Work Text:
Grunting moans ring out through the forest as a Honda Odyssey rattles with force in the distance. As you begin to zoom in, you see-
Ah, ah, ah! We'll get to the fun part later. As for now, you're probably wondering how I ended up in this situation. Let's start at where we met old Johnny boy and got our asses knocked out by some Mad Max wannabes.
After being knocked out in what could be considered the wasteland from Mad Max, Wade was definitely not expecting to find himself tied up against a very rugged and very angry Logan. It didn't even take a moment for him to realize why his partner in this little adventure is glaring down at him looking as if steam is coming out of his ears.
Wade is hard.
And not just the hardness he gets over tiny toy trains, or those tourist shops run by Asian women. He is as hard as the first time he saw that adorable little unicorn plushie in an aisle at his local Target. And it is pretty obvious that Logan has caught on as Wade's hard on twitches against his thigh.
" You've got to be fucking kidding me," Logan gruffs, eyes glaring daggers down at Wade. If Logan is trying to be threatening, it is working, just not in the way he's probably hoping. It becomes evident when Wade's cock twitches again, bouncing as the car's vibration rubs it even harder against his leg.
" Guilty as charged, but can you even blame me," Wade asks with a seductive chuckle, playfully moving his face closer to Logan's.
" You're fucking disgusting," Logan scoffs, turning his head away and trying his best to put as much space between them despite the bonds connecting them. Wade knows he shouldn't, but he only leans closer, rubbing himself harder against Logan's leg as he lays his head on his chest.
" Cut me some slack. You're a six three brick of meat and testosterone. Of course, I'd want a piece of that."
The next moment Logan's claws come out, and Wade is shouting in pain.
" Nicked it. Just got the tip with your little steak knife."
Wade still wouldn't be lying that it turns him on, only moving his head off Logan's chest to break the tension so the man wouldn't cut his whole dick off.
" Just shut the fuck up," Logan growls, turning his head away before retracting his claws.
" I agree with him. Could you not actively harass someone while I'm watching."
Wade perks up and turns his head, only to notice that Johnny boy himself is tied up right behind them.
" Quiet down. You're not the one who's tied against a buffed up Hugh Jackman."
" Who," Logan and Johnny ask at the same time.
Wade sighs, and shakes his head.
" Uncultured. The both of you."
" Look, whatever is going on between you two, can it wait till I'm gone?"
" There's nothing going on between us," Logan growls, getting more pissed off by the second.
" Ohhh, someone's being a tsundere. However, this isn't the right format for that type of content."
" SHUT UP," Logan shouts, kicking his knee up and managing to hit Wade right in the balls. Wade kneels over and ends up resting his head on Logan's chest again. It doesn't matter how many times he's split in half, sliced, stabbed, or exploded, a kick to the balls will always be the most painful and breathtaking injury he experiences.
" Okay, okay, I get it. No more flirting till after we're free from this," Wade gasps, managing to pull himself away from Logan and stay back while the conversation shifts back into the situation at hand, even as Wade's cock is still hard against Logan's thigh.
I know you've already seen this scene, so let's just skip to the good part, you little perverts.
They're already halfway into fighting each other, clawing and slashing the other with deep cuts as they roll around, in, and out of the Honda. It's almost funny if they weren't trying to kill each other. Still, Wade is having problems again. He hates to admit it
no I don’t
but he's getting hard from this. What started as a fight to the death has now, in Wade's mind, turned into a steamy hate/lust session. Except, Logan has no idea about it. Logan is still stabbing and tearing off pieces from Wade's body as he hopes he can shut the man up for good. Meanwhile, Wade, the masochist that he is, is growing ten times bigger like the Grinch, except it's his cock instead of his heart.
They're both in the back seat as Logan pins Wade down, claws stabbing into his shoulder as Logan growls down at him. Wade can't stop the light whine that escapes his lips, and Logan can tell that was not a whine of pain. It only takes a moment for Logan to look down and see the bulge in Wade's pants.
" Are you fucking serious," Logan growls, voice deep and dark, giving Wade a look that could kill if he could die.
Wade sort of shrugs, laughing lightly and Logan stops his attack for a moment, still leaving his claws stuck in Wade.
" Do you get off on being in dangerous situations? Are you a fucking masochist?"
" No," Wade says sarcastically while obviously shaking his head.
" I can't fucking do this," Logan gruffs before retracting his claws and pushing himself away from Wade.
" Wait wait wait wait wait! Don't you think you could use another outlet to let out your frustrations? Old Wadey's been told he's got a nice, tight behind."
" You've gotta be fucking kidding me."
" Wait," Wade shouts with a pause before gripping his cock through his pants," They’ve also said I’ve got a pretty nice sword too.”
Logan doesn’t even react, already pulling away and trying to get as far away from Wade as possible. Wade sighs and wraps his legs around Logan's waist, keeping their hips trapped together as Wade almost begs," Look I'm really fucking hard right now, and I would really appreciate it if you could just hate fuck me at the moment."
" You want to be hate fucked," Logan barks in question as his face curls with anger and Wade almost cowers for a moment, but it's like Marvel God came down and blessed his Marvel Jesus son as Logan tears off Wade's mask. Wade is about to speak before claws suddenly stab through the top of his head. Not in his brain, but far enough back to manage to literally trap his skull against Logan's claws.
" Ooh, kinky," Wade hisses, feeling pain in his head, but almost loving how gruesome this is. Logan uses his free hand to unbuckle his belt, now kneeling above Wade as the man lays below him.
" This will get you to shut up for once in your pathetic life," Logan growls, freeing his cock from his pants and Wade can count on his fingers how many times he's seen a cock this big.
It's one. The answer is one.
" I didn't know the great Wolverine was packing like th-ack," Wade is cut off as Logan forces his cock into his mouth. Logan doesn't start gentle by any means, already using the claws in Wade's skull to force his head up and down on his cock. Wade starts seeing stars, absolutely proud of himself for managing to get this going. He's going to have a victory jerk when he gets back home from all of this. Still, even as he has no choice in sucking Logan's cock, he is still trying his hardest to make this the best damn blowjob Logan has ever received. He makes sure to relax his throat, loving how he feels like he's suffocating every time Logan's cock pounds against it. He moves his tongue around, suctions his lips, he even brings a hand up to Logan's balls and starts cupping them. Logan growls, but it's much more primal this time, almost seeming like an animal as he forces Wade's head up and down his cock.
" I should have done this ages ago," He laughs to himself, taking Wade's hand that is not currently fondling his balls and pins it above his head. He releases his claws from Wade's head and instead uses the palm of his hand to force Wade's head down as he fucks his mouth. Wade can't stop the gags now, the man's cock reaching so deep in his throat he can feel it in his ass. He needs Logan inside of him, he needs to feel that big Wolverine cock shoved so deep in his ass he's sent to Marvel Heaven.
Wade doesn't even realize when Logan finally pulls his cock from his mouth. His throat almost pulsing as if Logan is still fucking it.
" You wanted a hate fuck, you're going to get one," Logan growls, not even passing a second as he begins to take off Wade's pants, not even worrying about the buckle as he practically tears them off. Wade is surprised at how his shoes managed to stay after the brutal abuse his pants received, but he's not going to ask. Wade smirks up at him, blood running down his face, as the wound on his head now fully heals. Logan looks down at what he's working with and it's almost hurtful how he laughs.
" Hey, Old Wadey's been told he has a nice little Wadey as well," Wade remarks pridefully, and Logan only scoffs. The man just spits down at his hole making Wade jump a bit as the wet substance covers his ass. Logan preemptively stabs his claws into Wade's hip, pinning them down in case Wade is a jumper. Wade only hisses as he watches Logan push a gloved finger inside his ass.
" Oh what a gentleman you are. What are you gonna do next, buy me some roses and take me on a long walk at the beach?"
" You want me to prep you or not," Logan asks threateningly, shoving his finger deep inside Wade making the man moan from below him.
" Honestly, I'd rather we just skip to the good part," Wade laughs, wiggling his ass even with the claws stuck in his hip bone.
" Gladly."
Logan instantly removes his finger, using his free hand to position his cock at Wade's entrance. For a second, there's a hesitance, both Wade and Logan can feel it. It doesn't mean anything as Logan quickly proceeds to shove his cock in full force. Wade lets out a pleasured scream, the pain and heat he feels making his body tingle like when a foot falls asleep, or is cut off.
" Fuck, you should have told me you were this big and I wouldn't have thought about being the top instead," Wade moans, watching as Logan pistons himself in and out of his tight hole.
" Can you ever just shut the fuck up," Logan yells, using his free hand to grip around Wade's throat. Wade lets out a short gasp as his airway is cut off. Logan has a strong grip and Wade can't even get a gasp of air. Wade almost wishes he wasn't immortal so that he could wear the bruise this is gonna cause for weeks. He loves the fuzzy feeling he's starting to get, his head feeling empty as all the oxygen depletes from his body. Wade believes he did it on purpose, but at the exact moment Wade feels like he's going to pass out, Logan hits his prostate, straight on and with a force that has Wade choking out a scream with the air he has left. Logan finally loosens his grip for a moment and Wade almost passes out from the sudden air intake.
" You sure know how to fuck a guy," Wade gasps out, moans nonstop as Logan continues to pound into his prostate.
" But if you really wanted to shut me up, I have a better idea," He says as he wraps his arms around Logan's neck and pulls the man closer to him before crashing their lips together. Surprisingly, instead of pushing away, Logan loosens his grip even more as he begins to kiss him back. It's all teeth and tongue as Wade tries to fight for dominance. He may look like an idiotic, fucked up bottom, but Wade fucks. Logan has probably just never seen another cock before which is why he laughed, it's definitely not because Wade is small. So he's done the whole dommy toppy thing or whatever so he should be able to take control of this kiss even while being fucked mercilessly.
Turns out, Logan does not like that. Logan shoves his tongue deep inside Wade's mouth, taking up the space as spit builds between them. Wade is holding on for dear life as Logan fully consumes his body, thrusts growing quicker as he now fucks Wade's throat with his own tongue. It's better than anything he's ever felt before and he cannot let this stop. He brings his legs up to Logan's waist, fully wrapping himself around the man as their chests press together. Wade can only imagine what the man would look like with his shirt off, and imagine he does. They cling together almost like animals and it almost seems accidental when Logan's claws extrude from the hand around Wade's throat, shooting straight into the already destroyed seat below them. Logan also finally removes his claws from Wade's hips as he grabs at his cock instead.
" Fuck," Wade gasps out against Logan's lips. Logan finally pulls away as he begins to stroke Wade's cock. Wade knows he's close, he's so close, and he can tell Logan is as well. They're both panting at this point, Logan's thrusts hard and uneven as Wade loses himself in the pleasure. Logan almost seems to remember Wade's masochism as he pulls his claws out from the seat and away from his throat, only to drag the sharp claws down his stomach, just enough to make him bleed. Wade twitches and suddenly he's coming with a loud scratchy moan. Waves of white splash onto his already healing stomach as Logan continues his erratic thrusts. Logan also helps pump his cock a couple more times before bringing both hands to Wade's waist. Wade almost feels like a sex doll as Logan pretty much fucks him onto his cock, grunting before letting out a growl. Wade feels as the warm cum spills inside of him, filling him up until it begins to leak down his ass. For a moment they just sit there, taking in what just happened as their post nut clarity begins to sink in.
" You know, I really thought you were gonna have a weird Wolverine looking dick."
" WADE!"
Aaaand that is it everybody. We fight each other, we get out of the stupid void, we have a lovers moment of sacrifice where I get to see Logan's beautiful chest, and now we live happily ever after. I'm a sucker for a happy ending.
P.S. We totally have sex all the time now.
P.P.S. I've totally gotten to top him, he just doesn't know it yet.
P.P.P.S. Doesn’t that sound funny? ppps? It’s fucking hilarious.
P.P.P.P.S. Bye!