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She burned a whole through the curtains, with that intense stare unbreakable and interminable to try. She was captured by the way they danced—bunching and releasing, then setting a pattern of waves, the wind determining its speed; like a silent wind chime, or those mills nestled in the foothills of Resembool that conducts electricity for the town. The magenta sea of fabric put her mind into a pleasurable limbo, taking away the unwanted thoughts that had kept her up all night.
First thing in the morning, Winry was supposed to head for the train station. She was supposed to see Ed off when his train arrives. Ed was supposed to travel out West, just as Al was already traveling back East.
When Al left, she and Edward were excited for him. They urged him to learn as much as he can, meet as many people as he could, see as much as there was to see. It was inevitable that his brother would follow the same path. He could never sit still—Winry knew this as well as she knew him. Of course, she was excited for him, too, but it wasn’t until the week before his departure that it truly dawned on her.
These past two years with the brothers spoiled her. She knew that the day would come when they leave again, and she completely supported their need for adventure, yet she couldn’t help but feel like a child with her beloved sugar snatched from her dimpled hands.
At least when Al was gone, she still had Ed, even if she missed the benevolent younger brother nonetheless. But, tomorrow, the elder brother was leaving as well.
No longer would she wake up to those hefty arms wrapped around her. No longer would she hear that unique voice piercing her ear when he was angry, or the added soft gruffness when he was sleepy. No longer would she glare into those poignant molten eyes that gleamed with undistinguishable heat. No longer would she feel her heart drum at the slightest touch, or the smallest affection, or the fury directed at him when he was being presumptuous. No longer would she deal with the termite of the house, the young man consuming every last bit of food that resided in the kitchen. No longer would she hear about what an idiot she was, until having the insult quickly compensated as she was pulled to his chest, nestled into a powerful and genuine embrace that made up for the words they didn’t speak.
The words they didn’t speak. In the past week, there were none. No words exchanged, except a simple “good morning” or any other casual speech that could be said between two strangers. Ed stopped sleeping in her bed, or doing anything for that matter that indicated they were romantically involved.
Not that they had gone past an open-mouth kiss that lasted a duration of a few minutes. Hell, they didn’t even label each other as girlfriend and boyfriend, and they tried as hard as they could to keep it secret from everyone, even though the Granny and Al had known for some time. In fact, their true feelings were never clearly stated, just assumed; there wasn’t even the simple “I love you”. Another thought for Winry to dwell on that night. Just how did he feel about her? She knows that he cares, but was her care deeper than his? Where were things going between them? Perhaps he’d meet another girl in Creta or Aerugo. A girl that was beautiful and foreign and loved the things he loved. A girl that didn’t nag him about his automail, or strike him with a wrench when she was pissed, or bicker with him over nothing from day to day. A girl that didn’t—
Creeeeeeak~
The sound of a door being nudged open interrupted her train of thought, which was followed by musically uneven footsteps.
Bu-bump
Clank
Bu-bump
Clank
Bu-bump—
The music pulled to a halt in mid-step. Once it did, it became so quiet in her bedroom that she could hear the soft breathing of the person standing beside her bed, their eyes burning into her blanket-covered back just as she did to the curtains. Her eyelids were half-lit, loosening their grip from the balcony door. She knew who was in her presence. But, for some reason, she didn’t want to acknowledge him, or let him know that she was awake.
A sigh penetrated the soft rhythm of breaths. From behind, she felt the mattress dip down, and a body roll onto it. Once the arms and legs settled comfortably, she continued to feel the gaze upon the back of her head, which barely peaked out from under the sheets.
Finally, a gruff, yet soft, bitter, yet sweet, hot, yet cold, voice spoke up through the silent darkness.
“Winry…”
She was pleased to hear that voice speak her name, no matter the circumstance. A feeling overwhelmed her and made her want to turn around, but she remained a corpse.
“…Are you awake, Winry?”
The blonde was unmoving for a second, and just as he was about to assume that she was asleep, she rolled back to face him, blue eyes forming crescent moons.
For a minute or so, they did nothing but stare at each other, as if coherent sentences didn’t need to make an appearance. But they did. The eighteen-year-olds knew this very well.
“L-Listen, Winry.” Her name. Again. Heated shivers ran up her spine. “I… I’m leaving tomorrow, and I… I can’t leave u-under these circumstances, I mean…”
He sounded so unsure. Nerves screwed up his speech, and it took everything he had to keep eye-contact with her. Which didn’t work out very well. In fact, the entire time his pupils were dancing between the ceiling and her face.
“Shhh, Ed,” she shushed him, saving him the embarrassment. “You don’t need to say anything. I know.”
Truth is, she didn’t. She was merely afraid to hear something she didn’t want to hear.
Lying side by side, they took the next few minutes to look up at the ceiling, rested on their backs, which admittedly was an awkward few minutes, especially when Ed opened his mouth to say something, but could only work his jaw mutely.
A gust of wind suddenly made its way through the cracked sliding-glass door, which initially was opened to let air in. Now that it was late at night, however, the temperatures dropped dramatically, turning the room into an ice rink. She shivered involuntarily.
Huddling up in her blankets didn’t help much—perhaps due to the material. She even had her warmest pair of blue pajamas on, which consisted of sweats and a button-up, long sleeved, collared pajama top that was cuffed at the sleeves. It looked like plain light blue at first sight, but if one looked closer, they could see transparent, paper thin white stripes hidden in the design.
The material was too thin, however, in spite of how much of her body it covered, so it didn’t stand a chance against the cold breeze.
“Burr,” Winry sounded as she got up, hugging herself all the way to the balcony. She used most of her strength to tug the sliding-glass door shut, then headed to the closet to find herself something warmer. Unfortunately, half of her clothes were in the laundry. This somehow included all of her jackets, robes, and coats.
She grunted as she tore through articles of clothing, desperately search for a jacket. “Geez,” she whined. “What happened to all of my jackets? I need to go clothes shopping…”
Ed rolled his eyes and resisted a grin. “Shoulda thought of that before you did the laundry, huh?”
She scowled at his lack of sympathy for her. On the other hand, that was the first statement he’s made with depth in a week. Her lips lightly tugged up, but she turned so he wouldn’t see her, muttering a, “Shuddup.”
When she went back to grumbling and digging through her clothes, Ed heaved out a sigh. He sat up, beginning to take his own jacket off.
“Here, just have mine,” said he, the aggravated sigh still hinted in his tone and countenance, shrugging the white layer off of himself. After, he was left with a gray V-neck tee-shirt and pajama pants of a red plaid design; this, plus his golden locks left down and tossed messily over his broad back and shoulders, sent another heated shiver into the small of Winry’s back.
She blinked. And hesitated. “Are you serious?” She’s heard stories of boys lending jackets to their girlfriends as a sign of affection, although this seemed more like a ploy to get her to shut up.
“Why the hell would I offer if I wasn’t serious? Just take it before I change my mind, woman.” He gestured the limp jacket toward her until he became impatient and began jangling it.
Slowly but surely, she took the jacket and pushed her arms through the sleeves. As she hugged it to her form, she remembered that this was the jacket he had worn when he and Al came home from the Promised Day.
She slithered onto the bed, happy with the jacket and how it cut out the night’s chill. How was it that boys’ clothes were always warmer?
Pulling the blanket over her shoulder, she was about to fall asleep right then and there, but for some reason, felt inclined to break the ice between her and him. She scooted closer to Ed until her body wriggled against his, temple listing on his collarbone. When her ear pressed against his chest, she could hear the strong pulse of his heartbeat, which dramatically sped up as she closed the distance between them.
His soft exhales brushed against the angelic crown of her head. He was awkwardly still for a moment, but as she grabbed a fistful of his shirt, he was quick to wrap his arms around her. This was the embrace that she would miss so dearly. She would miss a lot about Edward Elric.
The young man’s lips parted, and he tried to say everything that was on his mind, he really did, but the words died on his tongue.
“I’m gonna miss you,” Winry suddenly murmured, barely loud enough for the human ear to hear.
Blood settled on his cheeks. He wanted to reciprocate the comment, but without sounding corny or too mushy. “Erm… yeah…”
A sad pause was exchanged. She looked up at him with those round oceanic orbs, speaking a little clearer the second time. “Won’t you miss me?”
He was awestruck by the way her eyes bored into his, and all of a sudden, his countenance became hardened and serious.
“Of course,” he said—very coherently, at that. His eyebrows lowered, pulling together with a sort of emotion rarely seen on the lad. However, she didn’t buy it, starting to look away in disappointment of such a short answer. She would need more reassurance.
“…Win, I’ll be thinking about you just as much as I think about Al. There won’t be a moment that you’re not on my mind,” he claimed with a solid voice. To his surprise, no stutters intervened. “I swear by it.”
She forced herself to smile, releasing his shirt but keeping her hand rested on his side. She didn’t realize that it was the side with the pink mark forever embedded from Briggs. “Yeah.”
With that, she snuggled her face back into the pit of his chest. The feel of his muscles against her plush, albeit athletic, curves was like no other. It was odd—the mismatching texture of his legs. One felt flexible and burning, while the other felt hard as steel and frigid as ice. It was the only cold part of him, numbing her feet when they slept curled up together in sleep; because of this, Edward always noted to keep his automail as far from her as possible.
He wanted to say so much. His whole life, he had been falling for this girl, but even after they had broken the ice with their actions, he remained unable to truly “confess”. A clean-cut confession wouldn’t do the trick, though. He needed to promise her. He didn’t know what, but he knew that it had to be something infallible. A promise to drive him home after his journeys in the West. He had made promises to the people he loved before, and he always kept them.
“Winry...” he started, mustering up whatever courage he had left. When she didn’t respond, he said her name again. Nothing.
She was asleep.
With a sigh, he looked defeated. Might as well follow suit. He put his arms around her once again, nuzzling his nose into her hair. After a while, his eyes grew heavy, and he slowly lulled into a dreamless slumber.
XXX
They walked, side by side, soles scraping against the unpaved earth. Yes, they walked. And they walked.
And walked.
The morning itself wasn’t awkward. Mr. Elric and Miss Rockbell were back to their usual selves, arguing over what he packed and if he packed enough, him whining about her nagging, her gripping about him lagging. His childhood friend always had that quality—a motherly quality, if you will—that vexed him to no end, but melted his heart a little.
The walk, however, was like waking up to a hangover and a naked stranger in your bed.
They moved forward with stiff legs, spectacles daggered into the road ahead. Only occasionally would Ed glance into the sun with squinted eyes, or Winry stare sheepishly at her balled-up hands.
The only thing to breech the uncomfortable silence was the sound of cicadas buzzing. The only thing to ease their nerves was the springtime greenery surrounding them. Winry hugged her (or his) sweater to her form. She had forgotten that she put it back on this morning; Edward didn’t seem to have a problem with it. Neither of them made an attempt at conversation, although, the words he wanted to say were tickling his lips the entire time.
Time was passing. With each step, seconds were wasted. It was do or die; by the time that the train station came into view, he decided that dying wouldn’t be so bad.
XXX
“I’ll give you half of my life, so give me half of yours!”
…
“You’re such an idiot. I’ll give you all of it.”
…
“You’re so incredible! You knocked equivalent exchange flat on its butt in just a few words!”
…
“Thanks for cheerin’ me up.”
…
“Come home soon.”
…
As he slowly released her, Winry pulled him back in, hands bearing his cheeks, so sweetly pressing her lips to his. Heat rose to his face. It took him a moment until he gradually returned the kiss, eyelids flickering shut. They may have practiced this many times, but it sure felt like their first. Maybe not quite as awkward as the first, but the sparks and unfamiliar territory were the same.
Just before he leaped onto the train, the receptionist caught him mid-step and held up a camera. Edward’s grin practically ate his countenance—yes, that signature grin—as he swung his suitcase over his shoulder for the picture.
The wind was just right.
Fin