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It's been 46 years since Achilles Peleides has won his first championship; 37 years since he's won his last; 33 years since he's retired as a racing driver; 29 years since he's established a karting academy for children whose parents can't financially support their expansive dreams; 21 years since Chiron resigned and he took over as the Myrmidon team boss; 14 years since he turned his back to the racing world and moved to Australia.
14 years since he's first started the most important project of his life.
It's been 46 years, 138 days and 3 hours since Patroclus took his last breath, when a new video gets uploaded on Achilles' Instagram account. It's only sixteen seconds long.
The question 'Tell me why you feel the need to record absolutely everything?' is written in golden letters on a black background.
Like everything else in Achilles' life, the video starts with Patroclus. Or better yet, Patroclus' voice.
'It's obviously for the documentary I'm going to make in ten to fifteen years when Achilles is considered the greatest of all time.'
The question fades to black, and gets replaced with new words.
Lights Out - A Documentary
Out now
On all streaming platforms
Within a couple of hours, several million people follow the link in the caption, curious to see what a private person like Achilles Peleides has to share with the whole world.
The documentary starts just like the clip from Instagram, but then a clock is shown, counting back to the first race of Achilles' first championship season. There's a montage of all the highs and lows; The laughing and the yelling; The incidents and podium ceremonies; The tears and the trophies.
After it's done you can see Achilles sitting on a couch inside a living room. There's a screen next to him, angled in a way that makes it possible for both him and the interviewer to look at it. It shows a picture of him and Patroclus. They're standing in the paddock, he's not sure in which country, and he has an arm wrapped around Patroclus' shoulders. They're posing for a picture Diomedes was trying to take. A random photographer caught the moment on camera.
'There are those phrases,' Achilles explains, not taking his eyes off the photo. 'People love to use when thanking someone supportive after an accomplishment. I couldn't have done it without you. This win is as much yours as it is mine. You deserve just as much recognition. I always felt that those are a bit dramatic; More like a hyperbole or a metaphor. Then I met Patroclus, and for the first time in my life I started to understand. But after that first championship I wasn't able - wasn't allowed - to look at the public and say those things about him.'
'Why weren't you allowed?' A female voice behind the camera asks.
'Because it would've been more than a few platitudes.' Achilles explains, now looking directly into the camera. 'Because I wouldn't have won my first championship without Patroclus. Because he was the one driving the car in Abu Dhabi.'
There's a cut, and now you can see Diomedes, sitting in the trophy room of the Myrmidon Headquarters. The screen next to him shows a picture of him and Patroclus in Texas, dressed as cowboys, grinning like they've just won the lottery.
'No, I didn't know about it.' He explains with a sad smile. 'No one did. I just remember Achilles storming out of the garage and Patroclus following him. Everyone was on edge because we thought our top driver would refuse to drive the last and championship deciding race of the season. When the door to his drivers room opened a minute before the race started, the whole team was just relieved to see Achilles. But as it turned out, it was Patroclus wearing Achilles' racing gear.'
There's a cut, and now you can see Chiron sitting on a wooden bench underneath a tree. The greek sea can be seen in the distance behind him. The screen next to him shows a picture of him and Patroclus in his office. Patroclus is lying on the small sofa, seemingly telling a story with an excited smile on his face. Chiron, who's sitting on his desk, is trying hard to look annoyed about it.
'I blamed myself for many years.' He states, talking more to himself than to anyone else. 'I already worked with Achilles for so long at this point. I thought that I should've noticed; should've been able to tell them apart, by the way he got into the car or buckled up; By something, anything. But with time I've come to an important realization. They might have been very different, but where it mattered, they were so much alike. Two sides of the same coin.'
There's a cut, and now you can see Vania, sitting on the kitchen island of her home. The screen next to her shows a picture of her and Patroclus in a hotel bar. There are two ridiculously huge pink drinks with a ton of fruit and little umbrellas in front of them. They look delighted.
'Known about it?' Vania asks with her eyebrows raised to her hairline. She tries hard to look stoic, but there's a tear rolling down her cheek. 'Let me tell you, once I die, the first thing I'm going to do in heaven is find Patroclus and kick his ass. It's been almost fifty years and I'm still mad at him for coming up with this stupid plan... For dying just like that.'
The camera cuts back to Achilles.
'Racing is considered one of the most dangerous sports,' The female voice says. 'Patroclus was a well known and respected driver in the junior categories. But he never drove the newest Myrmidon car, he had no real life practice. Why would he have risked that much for you?'
Achilles smile turns pained, his eyes are back on the picture of himself and Patroclus.
He doesn't answer. Instead you can hear the others answering the same question for him. Their answers are played after one another, even though the wording is the exact same.
Because he loved Achilles more than anything.
There's a cut, and now you can see Christos sitting in between historic cars in the Myrmidon museum. The screen next to him shows a picture of him and Patroclus outside of the headquarters. Patroclus is sitting inside an older version of a Myrmidon car, while Christos is standing next to him, giving him two thumbs up with a bright smile on his face.
'I would've let him drive any car.' Christos says matter-of-factly. 'Without hesitation. It's no longer a secret that we prepared drivers in order to take over the team after Achilles' first championship season, and one of them was Patroclus. Even with this huge gap in his racing career resume, he was one of a kind. Quick, hard working, amazing perception. I know that he would've won championships if he would've had the opportunity. I'm glad he got to do it at least this one time.'
The camera cuts to Achilles.
'I can already hear the complaints.' He laughs softly. 'That they should scratch my first championship from the history books. That I should've gotten disqualified for life. But I don't care. I never did. Well, maybe I did care a little bit about the opinion of one person.'
There's a cut, and now you can see Hector sitting in the trophy room of the Trojan Technology Center, the vice champion trophy of the infamous season is placed right next to him.
'I know that this whole documentary will be a huge shock for a lot of people,' He explains with a fond smile. 'But I'll be honest with you, non of this was surprising to me. I started to get confused by lap nine, suspicious by lap fifteen, and sure that it wasn't Achilles in that car by lap twenty-one. And then the accident happened. I know everyone was saying that it was a miracle that nothing serious happened to him, but I wasn't buying the story. When I read the statement about Patroclus' passing all the pieces fell into place.'
'You're not angry about it?' The female voice asks. 'It could've been your championship.'
'No.' Hector says, shaking his head with a frown on his face. 'To both. I know that every racing driver should believe that they're the best, and that they're the one to end up victorious, but I knew that this wasn't my race to win. Patroclus was Achilles' secret weapon, so even if Achilles had decided to drive that day, Patroclus still would've been in that car with him. This was never about who was actually sitting in the car, but about their conjoined knowledge and support for each other.'
The documentary goes on for two and a half hours.
After they had come clean about the true story of Abu Dhabi, the championship and Patroclus' death, Achilles finally got to tell the world about their love.
Chiron says that he had known from the very start; From the moment Achilles walked into his office on the day of their introduction, and looked like he wasn't sure if he wanted to stare at Patroclus or the next best wall. He tells them about Patroclus not being able to shut up about Achilles, and how it was them against the world from the moment they had met.
Diomedes proudly recalls setting them up on a date in France. How he had known about Patroclus ability to speak french, and Achilles inability to hide his infatuation should he ever find out the same thing.
Vania begrudgingly admits that it took her longer than Diomedes to notice, but once she did, she couldn't fathom how she had missed it for so long. Every time one of them told a story, it didn't take long for the other to tell one that sounded suspiciously familiar. It was weird that Achilles gained excessive knowledge about Australia and its wildlife, just for Patroclus to come back after summer break with millions of pictures of him and kangaroos.
Christos laughs until he has tears in his eyes while retelling the time he caught Patroclus writing ridiculously corny text messages to someone who 'was definitely not part of the team' but weirdly enough always in the same time zone. He also caught them making out in their car in the parking lot once, but kindly chose to ignore it. Instead he accidentally honked a few times while getting into his own car, just to remind them of the existence of the outside world.
Achilles' part is the longest. At the beginning he struggles a bit, doesn't seem to know where or how to start.
'No memories?' The female voice behind the camera asks in a teasing tone, trying to break the tense situation.
'Darling,' Achilles says, looking at Patroclus' picture with a fond smile on his face. 'I am made of memories.'
He tells the world how great and kind Patroclus was, despite the cruel strokes of fate he experienced early in life. How he never gave up, and believed in fighting for what is right. How he made Achilles a better person. That it's only thanks to him, he started to support young children in karting, and worked with so many Australian wildlife charities that they now consider him an honorary citizen. He talks about the hardship of not being straight in a world like theirs. He shares their ritual of meeting up on Patroclus' death day. Chiron, Christos, Vania, Diomedes and Achilles, going to the same restaurant in Spain they used to plan the takeover of their team.
The documentary ends with a side by side of two pictures of them in front of said restaurant. The first with Patroclus over 46 years ago, the second from last year. It hurts Achilles to see how much they have changed. How they have gotten older, with gray hair and wrinkles all over their faces. It's a terribly stark contrast to Patroclus, who never got the chance the change.
'When I crashed in my second season,' Achilles voice explains. 'My mother wanted me to stop. The price you're paying for your fame is too high. I thought that I could prove her wrong; that I could be happy and famous. And for one season I was. Thanks to Patroclus. I know our time was limited, but I would give everything - every trophy, every award, every single championship - for one more day with him. That's the kind of person he was. And I'm happy that I can finally tell the world about it.'
At night Achilles lays in his bed and reads the comments about the documentary. People are shocked to say the least. There are reaction videos, and Achilles is moved to see how many people are crying over their love story. He's not sure why he's surprised though, a few months after Patroclus' death, people found out where he was buried, and it only took a couple of days until his gravestone drowned underneath hundreds of bouquets, candles and handwritten letters.
Achilles thinks about all the things he didn't tell the world; The things he considered too private; The parts of Patroclus' he still wants to keep to himself.
He never told anyone that the tablet he's currently using to read comments, is still Patroclus' work device; that the pin is still the same.
He never explained the smoking to anyone. How he couldn't live without cigarettes and strawberry candy every hour of every day of the first and second season without Patroclus. How he still had to do his newly found ritual every night and every morning during the third, because climbing into an empty bed and waking up alone was still too painful. How he only did it during non-race-weeks during his fourth, when there was nothing to keep his mind occupied. How he picked his sunset tradition back up during the fifth, but still had to have a cigarette and candy, because he wanted to feel like his boyfriend was celebrating with him. How he finally managed to stop during the sixth, only doing it on days when the feeling of missing Patroclus got too unbearable.
He never admitted that he still owns their appartement in Greece. That he never had the heart to sell it. That it still looks exactly like it did the morning they left for the last time.
He knows how that sounds. Like he lived a life in grieving. But he didn't. He had a beautiful life, with amazing friends and colleagues,and the racing career of his dreams.
He just never loved anyone even remotely close to how he loved Patroclus. So it was impossible for him to let go of the one place that was theirs. It was too easy to step inside the appartement and imagine him being there; Asleep on the couch, flipping pancakes in the kitchen, or brushing his teeth while dancing through the bathroom.
It was no surprise for anyone when Achilles decided to move Patroclus' grave to Australia. After all it's what he had promised him. He couldn't spent his retirement abroad while leaving him behind.
49 years after Patroclus died, Achilles takes his last breath. He gets buried right next to his love, in the country they'd spent their happiest moments together.
It's an open casket funeral, and racing fans all over the world talk about his black suit with the Myrmidon-golden tie. A loyal racing driver to the end.
They don't know that Achilles didn't choose this. He couldn't have cared less what he would be wearing the last time anyone could lay eyes on him.
The only thing of importance is the silver zippo lighter with the tiny strawberry engraved on it, in the inside pocket of his suit jacket; Resting right over his heart.