Chapter Text
Steve just turned his most pitiful puppy dog expression upon Bucky, and Bucky didn’t even know what to do with it. He hadn’t even known that Steve had a pitiful puppy dog expression until it hit him dead center, right in his chest. How did his face even do that? He thought the babies were bad, but seriously? Right now? They had nothin’ on Steve Rogers. And those lashes! The US military needed to replicate those and deem them top secret because they were fucking dangerous as hell. Jesus, he really needed to keep Steve to Dr. Banner’s orders, but he had no idea how to say no to that face.
“Buck, I’m dying. I really want a hamburger. I’m serious. I can’t do bland shit anymore. I just can’t. I’ll lose my damn mind.”
“Steve, c’mon, be reasonable, okay? Dr. Banner said you needed to ease back into normal food.”
Steve’s lip pooched out even further. Bucky couldn’t decide if he wanted to kiss it, bite it, or cry to the heavens for fucking help, because Steve seemed to know exactly how powerful that plush, pouty lip was.
“I just want a bacon burger! Bucky, please! I’ve been in this hospital for eight days! We can pick it up before we head home! Good Stuff isn’t that far!”
Bucky’s head fell back against his chair as he watched Steve pull on his hoodie and zip it. Eight days was right. Two days of cranky. Two days of sass. Two days of bored bitterness, and now they were closing out two days of whining. Whining on a level that put even Bucky himself to shame. He was going to do everything in his human powers to never allow Steve to fall ill enough to land in a hospital again. Jesus.
“A hamburger’s bad enough, but you wanna put bacon on it? That’s shit for your stomach, Steve!”
“It’s local farm sourced! Highest quality ingredients and all made in-house by their oh-so-talented chefs!”
Bucky tried so hard not to snort loudly at Steve’s commercial announcer voice, but it was a lost cause. If Steve wasn’t such an amazing artist, Bucky would’ve thought he’d missed his calling as a radio talk show host… or an infomercial actor.
“It’s still greasy!”
Wait, what the hell was he doing? Steve had dropped carefully to his knees and was crawling over to Bucky’s chair. He wormed his way between Bucky’s legs and rested his hands to Bucky’s shoulders. If Bucky so much as twitched his hips just a little… and fucking hell Steve had a long torso! How had he missed just how lanky Steve must have been before he beefed up?
“Buck,” Steve murmured seductively, his voice at just the right pitch, “I swear I will go back to safer food for the rest of the week if you will just get me a burger. I probably won’t even finish it!”
He let his fingers drag lightly down Bucky’s chest. “I just want… a… taste…” he teased, bringing his palms to rest upon Bucky’s thighs as he leaned in seductively.
Fucking shit. Little asshole. How was he supposed to rebuff that?!
“No fries,” Bucky choked.
“No problem,” Steve grinned. “Share a milkshake?”
“Don’t push your fucking luck, Rogers.”
Steve’s grin just grew. Punk.
*^*^*
Bucky dropped heavily onto the couch while Steve went to wash off at least some of the hospital smell. Near the door, the babies were putting on their best appearance of behaving, but Rig was licking his chops expectantly.
“Forget it,” Bucky muttered at him. “I’m not even getting up from this couch… like ever…”
Eight days was a long time to hang out in a hospital chair. He’d come back to shower, change his clothes, and give the babies a little love, but that was mostly it. After he’d pulled several ninja stealth moves to get into Steve’s room after visiting hours, the nurses had basically given up and pointedly ignored his presence. The downside of his brilliance and tactical skill was that he hadn’t really slept much in the last eight days. Actually, he hadn’t slept much before that either, since he’d been keeping vigil over Steve at his apartment.
So tired didn’t even begin to cover it. He’d be lucky if he managed to crawl back to his own apartment. The dogs might have to drag him by his pant legs.
Bucky was already halfway through his burger when Steve came back and sat down beside him. Steve wasn’t that much better off than Bucky. He didn’t sleep well in hospitals, and who could blame him? Trying to get that 6’2” frame comfortable on that hospital bed was a ridiculous notion.
Steve stared at the black screen of his tv as he took a couple of bites of his burger. He chewed absently, partially zoning out just like Bucky… then he frowned and looked down. He slowly picked a mushroom from his burger and eyed it with a dumbfounded expression.
“It’s… a mushroom…” Steve swallowed the bite in his mouth and grimaced. “Why is it spicy?”
Bucky turned his head to look at Steve, then the mushroom. “What’d you order again?”
Steve looked over at Bucky, then down at the burger in his hand, of which there was about a quarter left. His finger shot out accusingly to point at the applewood bacon dangling from it.
“I ordered THAT!”
Bucky’s eyes widened. Sure enough, Steve had his steakhouse burger with cremini mushrooms, and he’d just sleepily devoured most of Steve’s coveted bacon burger. He looked up at Steve guiltily as he gulped down the bite in his mouth.
“Oh shit, Stevie… I’m so sorry!”
Steve’s eyes narrowed and Bucky quickly held out the last three bites to him. “I forgot what I ordered… but uh… here…?” He hastily swapped the burgers as Steve silently fumed and pouted.
“Hey, you said you just wanted a taste anyway,” Bucky deflected as he practically turned away from Steve to start wolfing down his intended burger before Steve murdered him in cold blood. Just for good measure, he pushed the nearly-full toasted marshmallow milkshake toward Steve with his fingertips.
“Here, pal. You can have the whole milkshake, okay?”
“I am so killing you once you fall asleep. Your dogs won’t even care because I’ll feed them Malnati’s twice a week.”
“That’s really hurtful talk, Stevie,” Bucky mumbled past another mouthful of swiss and onion straws.
“We haven’t even had sex yet, and you stole the hamburger I’d been dreaming about for three days,” Steve grumped. “I’m breaking up with you.”
“We aren’t even official yet,” Bucky frowned. “How can you break up with me if you never got with me in the first place?”
“Shortcut,” Steve harumphed. “Task management.”
“Stevie,” Bucky whined, “I’m not a task!”
“No,” Steve allowed after a couple of seconds, “you’re a menace.”
“Menace?!”
“Yeah.” Steve bit into what was left of his burger and groaned, the whole time keeping a guarded side-eye upon Bucky. “I’m blaming you for Rig’s food thieving!”
“Whaaaat?” Bucky could only gape at Steve. “I did not teach him that!”
“My burger will be avenged, Buck. I just wanted you to know.”
“Stop sounding like Lana del Rey and finish your food before I take it back,” Bucky growled, and silence befell them as they continued to eat with tense, feral, food distrust hanging heavily between them. Even the dogs were watching them carefully. Someone had to drop something at some point, right?
“I can’t believe you know who that is,” Steve snorted suddenly.
“Clearly so do you,” Bucky grunted past his next to last bite of burger. “M’not bringing you a trash can if you have to throw that back up.”
Steve just smiled at him as he slurped obnoxiously at his milkshake. Bucky secretly mourned its loss.
“Yes, you will.”
“No, I won’t.”
“Yep.”
“Nope.”
Steve leaned in close. “You like me. You braved dragon breath for me. You’ll bring me one.”
“Go fuck yourself,” Bucky huffed as Steve bumped into him.
“I’d rather fuck you,” Steve whispered coyly, but Bucky quickly shook his head in spite of his cock’s sudden interest. Thank god he was half asleep sitting up, otherwise he’d already have Steve halfway to the bedroom.
“You are not puking bacon burger on me in the middle of sex,” he stated firmly. “Even I have my limits.”
“Awww,” Steve grinned, voice still low. “Kink for another time, then.”
Dear lord, how could this kid be so perky on so little sleep? God help them both when they were both rested and healthy.
“Uh… Have some pity on me, Steve. I’m barely staying vertical right now.”
Steve’s expression softened dramatically as he brushed a crumb away from the corner of Bucky’s mouth. It was a sweet, fond smile that curved his lips as he nodded.
“Yeah, you’ve been taking such good care of me, you haven’t done much for yourself,” he murmured, suddenly serious. He wordlessly held the milkshake at an angle so all Bucky had to do was lean a fraction toward him to take a drink.
“How are you with midday naps?”
“Soldier, Stevie,” Bucky mumbled back, his eyes riveted to Steve’s. “‘Can sleep anywhere, anytime.”
“Oh, well then my bed should be a piece of cake…”
Bucky smiled wearily. “Right now I don’ think I can manage anything other than falling into a pillow.”
“Good,” Steve chuckled as he stood up and offered Bucky his hand, “‘cause I don’t put out until after the first date anyway… and you promised me thief-free dining.”
His smile slowly spreading wider, Bucky stared at Steve for a long moment, just drinking him in as best as his sleep-deprived brain could manage before taking Steve’s hand. Cuddling up with Steve for a ridiculously long nap sounded like fucking paradise.
Once they cleared the food wrappers and bags away from dog reach, Bucky followed Steve into his bedroom. They kicked off their shoes, and ditched their jeans; there was enough summer warmth coming inside to make cuddling with too many clothes problematic even for a person just getting over being sick. Steve shucked his hoodie and climbed in, leaving the sheet and comforter turned down. Bucky climbed in behind him, and even though Steve was a little taller, they still fit together just fine. Bucky wrapped his arm around Steve’s waist and nuzzled into the back of his neck.
“You stink,” he sighed contentedly.
“Thanks,” Steve sighed back.
It was all Bucky heard before he essentially passed out, a soft smile still upon his lips and Steve still clutching his hand.