Archive of Our Own

Hanguang-Jun is as aloof and unapproachable as the moon and twice as cold as a cloudless winter's night.

Or so the tales, that Wei Wuxian had heard during his travels, had said.

The description was beautiful, he had to admit. It evoked a sense of beauty and grace, of being far removed from the concerns of daily life; fitting for a war hero and the Chief Cultivator. For a man as beautiful as Lan Zhan was, inside and out.

But mostly it spoke of loneliness and endless cold in his opinion. Everything Lan Zhan wasn't and should never be allowed to be.

"Twice as cold as a winter's night," he repeated mockingly as he looked down at the man kneeling in front of him. "If anyone of your admirers could see you like this they would faint from shock, you know? The mighty Hanguang-Jun, patiently waiting for me, of all people, to decide what you're allowed to have."

The words sent a shudder through Lan Zhan's whole body. Aloof or not, he, too, knew very well what society thought of him. He'd borne the burden of their expectations for his whole life but now, that he had to no longer to do it alone, he could allow himself the luxury of letting go occasionally.

But, letting go was hard for him. So Wei Wuxian, in all his generosity, had offered his help. It had taken time and the help of Zewu-jun, but in the end the stars had aligned in the right way to give them this respite from an incredible exhausting daily routine that was slowly sucking the life out of the strongest person Wei Wuxian had ever known.

"You'll feel better after this, I promise."

Lan Zhan looked up at him. Wordless and, apart from a few very select people who could read him, expressionless. He looked so much like the younger version of himself who had once knelt in the Jin banquet hall, nearly forced to drink against his will before Wei Wuxian had swooped in and taken the wine in his stead.

But instead of being dressed in layer upon layer of white and pale blue he now was only wearing Wei Wuxian's bright red underrobe, already half undone. His hair, usually imprisoned in elegant pins and elaborate hairpieces, was only loosely kept back from his face, its singular adornment a filigree silver chain decorated with evenly spaced blue gem stones and tipped with a tiny lotus charm on each end. Wei Wuxian had carefully braided Lan Zhan's hair and threaded through it this morning. He had forced himself out of bed even earlier than usual, all to give Lan Zhan something to look forwards to during the day. One length of if fell over his shoulder and made him look even more relaxed and unlike himself.

Wei Wuxian had caught him fiddling with the chain when he thought himself unobserved a couple of times during the day. It painted an unexpectedly adorable picture. He needed to spoil his Lan Zhan more often like this, he'd decided. Lan Zhan liked pretty things, and Wei Wuxian liked seeing him so happy with his little gifts. Also, decorating his husband and making him even more enticing was just plain fun.

This playful version of him, so unlike the aloof Hanguang-Jun he presented to the outside world, was rarely allowed free reign. This, Wei Wuxian had learned, was who Lan Zhan truly was, deep down, when he permitted himself to be stripped of all the expectations the world, his sect, and his family put on him.

Bare, unadorned, indescribably lovely and unexpectedly needy.

His headband had already found its usual evening home around Wei Wuxian's left wrist while Lan Zhan's wrists were very loosely bound by a red hair ribbon. He, himself, was down to an underrobe in pure black - by Lan Zhan's request, because he liked the contrast between black and red. Otherwise, Wei Wuxian would have grabbed one of Lan Zhan's white ones.

He took a moment to appreciate the stark contrast between the black sleeve and the white ribbon wound around his wrist. Lan Zhan had, as always, been right. The contrast was lovely to look at.

As always, Lan Zhan had made very sure that the silver cloud motif was pressed against Wei Wuxian's pulse point before he'd tied it in place with an expression of utter contentment.

Some traditions must be observed, no matter that the rest of the night would go a completely different way from the usual.

"My savior," Lan Zhan had called him not long ago when Wei Wuxian had reminisced about that moment in the Jin banquet hall, followed by a quiet but amused: "I'm glad you remember. I have thought about this moment often, as well." His expression had been a little bit wistful.

Wei Wuxian, once he'd gotten over his indignation at being called out like that, realized what Lan Zhan was truly trying to communicate and immediately started to make plans to give him what he could only fantasize about before, setting in motion a chain of events that culminated in tonight. Tomorrow, too, but Lan Zhan knew little of those plans yet.

Back then Wei Wuxian had saved Lan Zhan from the evils of alcohol. Today he would be the one coaxing Lan Zhan into drinking it, under highly controlled circumstances.

But first... a bit of fun. He gently caressed Lan Zhan's face with one hand - with special focus on the spot normally taken by the cloud emblem - and smiled when his husband immediately tilted his head for maximum contact. At first, Wei Wuxian had been surprised at how tactile Lan Zhan was but, after thinking about it for a moment, he could have kicked himself for his stupidity. Of course Lan Zhan liked to be touched with tenderness and care! Who didn't? And his Lan Zhan, who had had so little opportunity for it, due to a disastrous combination of bad things happening and an introvert personality? Was practically starved for touch, something that Wei Wuxian had only slowly realized and that had almost broken his heart.

His new goal in life now was to endlessly touch and caress and spoil Lan Zhan with physical affection.

Lan Zhan, in turn, was a like a sponge, soaking it up. Or, to put it a little bit more poetic: He was like a flower turning towards the sun. Only, in this case the sun was Wei Wuxian and there was no danger of burning up.

It had taken him far too long to realize the truth behind Lan Zhan's defensive steps away from him, coupled with a sharp "don't touch me!" all those years ago. He still didn't know if he was supposed to laugh about Lan Zhan's helpless anger in the face of his then unasked for attraction to Wei Wuxian or if he should laugh at just how fucking stupid, blind and stubborn they both had been back then.

"Are you ready?" he asked softly. He got a slow blink and a barely discernible nod as his answer. "Tilt your heard back. No, no," he clarified when Lan Zhan leaned back too far. "Like this." He put his left hand on the back of Lan Zhan's neck and gently maneuvered him into the right position.

Lan Zhan and alcohol had… a complicated relationship, to put it mildly, and Wei Wuxian was very aware of it. Every day he was confronted with scar of the brand Lan Zhan had inflicted on himself while being drunk stupid, and Lan Zhan blacking out after more or less a single sip and going out for shenanigans before falling over like a stone were amusing as well as concerning at the same time.

"I want to know why you enjoy it so much," Lan Zhan had confessed not too long ago and, coupled with his fond reminiscing about being almost being forced to drink, made Wei Wuxian come up with this little plan.

There were three full cups on a small table next to them, along with a shallow bowl filled with oil and a small plate with sweets. Two cups contained wine - both filled with Emperor's Smile but the cup meant for Lan Zhan contained far more water than actual alcohol. The third was filled with plain water, to be used later, just like the oil.

Wei Wuxian didn't have a concrete plan of what would happen after Lan Zhan drank the wine - he would decide that in the heat of the moment, depending on how Lan Zhan reacted and what he wanted and needed. Various possibilities flitted through his mind but he didn't settle on any of them.

Wei Wuxian was nominally in control of this evening, yes, but in the end Lan Zhan would be the one to decide what he wanted. Or, at least show Wei Wuxian what he needed with his expressions and body both and Wei Wuxian would do his very best to give him exactly that.

"Baby steps, Lan Zhan," he'd explained when that especially stubborn expression had appeared on Lan Zhan's face after noticing the difference. "We're going to get you used to it slowly. I want you to actually remember this, for once, and also to enjoy the experience. We both know you would do neither if I pour undiluted wine down your throat."

Lan Zhan was forced to concede the point but he wasn't happy about it. Not even a pointed reminder of all the rules they would be breaking got a rise out of him; he'd only looked at Wei Wuxian and simply said: "Nobody can dictate what we do in the privacy of our home, except ourselves."

He had really come far from his obsessive following of too many stupid rules and found his own personal code of conduct amongst the thousands upon thousands of unnecessary ones.

Wei Wuxian was so in awe of him and the man he had become and, at the same time, had become very adept at blocking out any thoughts about why Lan Zhan had been forced to grow out of his narrow worldview and change to such an unbelievable degree. If he concentrated on the incredible fondness he felt for Lan Zhan, he was in no danger of simply dissolving because of the words 'our home', which was an added bonus.

Alcohol was forbidden in the Cloud Recesses. But so were pets and, arguably, Wei Wuxian himself - at least according to the grumblings of some of the remaining Elders. Not even Lan Qiren paid them any mind these days and neither did anybody else important. Lan Zhan had long since given up on rules he couldn't see the reason for and ever since their reunion he had indulged Wei Wuxian in every way he could, often under the watchful and amused eyes of his brother.

The Lan sect had truly become better under Lan Xichen's leadership following the war and with the slow but inevitable passing of one Elder after the other. It meant less opposition for new ways and even Lan Qiren had allowed himself to bent to an unbelievable degree ever since the day Lan Zhan and Wei Ying had taken their wedding vows in the Cloud Recesses, right in front of him.

At the end of the day that man loved his nephews, supported them and gave them whatever he could Wei Wuxian had discovered to his shock.

That Wei Wuxian even had his own personal stash of Emperor's Smile in the Jingshi, always replenished as if by magic long before it could run out, was an open secret between the four of them. Five, if one counted Sizhui, who had just shaken his head with a smile and declared that he knew nothing about it when Wei Wuxian had asked him.

One of the bottles, the oldest one, was still untouched. It was the first one Lan Zhan had ever smuggled into the Cloud Recesses, back when he had still been deeply entangled within his grief.

Wei Ying's name was written on the bottle in the most breathtaking beautiful calligraphy he had ever seen.

"A memento. A promise", Lan Zhan had called it when asked about it, "I looked at it while calling out for you."

Such simple words, with such a world of meaning behind them. Such a deep love, unspoken for so long. For years Lan Zhan had been the only one to bear its scars, to remember, to wish for a second chance that he knew would never come.

He was becoming too maudlin, Wei Wuxian decided, and wrenched his wandering attention back to the breathtaking picture right in front of him.

He took a moment to commit it to memory - Lan Zhan, kneeling, his loosely bound hands demurely folded in his lap, looking up at him with an completely open expression, the back of his neck supported by Wei Wuxian's hand.

The light of the candles reflected in his eyes in a way that made them look lighter than they actually were, giving them an almost golden hue, and making him even more enticingly beautiful than he already was.

With his free hand he reached out and very nearly took the wrong cup because he was too busy staring at the ethereal vision in front of him. Lan Zhan blinked in amusement, clearly willing to drink whatever Wei Wuxian would give him, be it slightly alcohol flavored water or undiluted wine.

The power he had over Lan Zhan was exhilarating.

And, if he was being honest with himself, a little bit scary.

He knew what Lan Zhan wanted, what he had fantasized about for years, yes, but now, confronted with the beautiful reality of him kneeling and patiently waiting to be 'forced' to drink alcohol with the express purpose to allow him to lower his defenses…

There was responsibility in this, Wei Wuxian suddenly realized. The responsibility to make this as good and pleasurable as possible, to not invite even a single shred of regret into this experience.

Lan Zhan trusted him, with everything he was. Mind, body and soul.

He swallowed, hard, and had to take a moment before he could be sure that his hand was steady when he reached out to grab the wine.

"Open your mouth, Lan Zhan," he whispered, surprised at how rough his voice sounded.

Lan Zhan obeyed immediately. His eyes were still wide open and fixed on Wei Wuxian's face. His gaze never wavered, not even when Wei Wuxian held the cup against his slightly parted lips.

"Don't swallow right away," he instructed softly, "savor the taste, feel the burn in your mouth."

He couldn't really remember how he had reacted to alcohol when he had begun drinking it but Lan Zhan was so sensitive and unused to it that it would burn, Wei Wuxian was sure of it.

A slow blink was Lan Zhan's acknowledgement of his instruction as well as his final permission.

Wei Wuxian tipped the cup and fed Lan Zhan the entire contents in one go. He put the cup away and took a moment to gaze longingly at the still full one.

No, he told himself. He would take his wine today from Lan Zhan's lips, his mouth. He had no desire to dilute the taste of the barely flavored water.

He pressed his lips against Lan Zhan's closed ones in a attempt to steal some of it but didn't deepen the kiss like he usually would.

"You can swallow," he said finally when he realized that Lan Zhan was waiting for his permission. The realization sent a stab of arousal through his whole body.

"Savor it," he whispered before withdrawing again. "Feel it burn down your throat and into your stomach." He gently squeezed the back of Lan Zhan's neck and watched in fascination as he swallowed the wine down audibly. Even in something normal like this Lan Zhan managed to exude an elegance that was breathtaking.

All the time his eyes stayed open and fixed on Wei Wuxian with a single-minded determination what would have been scary if it wasn't so damn addicting.

"Close your eyes," he instructed and watched in fascination as he was once again obeyed without the slightest hesitation. He tried to move his hand away but Lan Zhan made a tiny, barely discernible but clearly protesting, sound and so Wei Wuxian gave him another squeeze to reassure him. "Shh, I'm here." He pressed the fingers of his free hand against the pulse point at Lan Zhan's throat.

The long chain that Wei Wuxian had commissioned for him - and that Lan Zhan had incorporated into his hairstyle one way or the other every day since the moment he'd received it - brushed against his wrist and he playfully batted it away to get better access.

Lan Zhan tried to move away out of instinct but Wei Wuxian easily held him in place. Lan Zhan didn't want to flinch from his touch and had communicated his unhappiness about his body's reflexes in regards to tenderness more than often enough. By now, Wei Wuxian was used to holding him in place when their playing around got into those particular directions.

Lan Zhan's breathing was slow and steady but his heartbeat was noticeably faster than usual - a clear sign of excitement. Lan Zhan was so good at not giving any outwards signs of his physical state but Wei Wuxian had learned to read the tiniest of signs.

"Shh", he repeated, while gently stroking the side of Lan Zhan's neck. "Your heart is racing so much, Lan Zhan, after barely a sip. It's not worth that much excitement."

Lan Zhan opened his eyes just enough to give him an unimpressed look before closing them again. "Mn."

It's not only the wine that excites me, Wei Wuxian translated, but decided to do him the favor of not mentioning it.

"How does it taste?" he asked out loud. After a moment of deliberation he went down onto his knees in front of Lan Zhan. He was still holding his head immobile with one hand and monitoring his pulse with the other.

In answer Lan Zhan licked his lips and leaned his head back even further, trusting Wei Wuxian to hold him steady. The gesture, that made his hair and the chain threaded through it cascade down his left shoulder and back, was slow and sensual and enough to fully wake up the long-simmering arousal that had been thrumming through Wei Wuxian's body since the moment Lan Zhan had gone down on his knees right in front of him.

Lan Zhan was always a vision of beauty and grace but never more so as when he gave himself over into Wei Wuxian's care. He absolutely had to lean in to steal another kiss from those tempting lips.

"I shouldn't take advantage of you when you're in a state like this."

Even while saying those ridiculous words he was busy pushing Lan Zhan back until he could lower him slowly to lying down. Lan Zhan followed his prodding without a hint of protest - or even surprise - and only sighed in contentment when he was arranged on his back.

Wei Wuxian squeezed the back of his neck one last time before withdrawing his hand after making sure that Lan Zhan was lying down comfortably. His hair was fanned out beneath him which made him look even more unfairly beautiful, and Wei Wuxian couldn't resist the temptation to snag a strand of hair twined with one end of the chain. He idly twisted it round his fingers. Another vaguely protesting sound that made him smile followed.

"Still okay?" he asked. Lan Zhan shouldn't be feeling any effects, not after just a few drops, but still…

A slow nod was Lan Zhan's answer, followed by an even slower blink. "Tastes good," he murmured and licked his lips once again. With his right hand he touched the hem of the red robe and looked at it as if he was seeing it for the very first time.

Wei Wuxian grabbing one of Lan Zhan's white underrobes and parading them around the Cloud Recesses was nothing new, these days, but the reverse was a special treat reserved for nights like this.

Now, Lan Zhan was exploring the fabric as if he was wearing if for the very first time. His careful and thorough examination made Wei Wuxian smile while he attempted to beat his fondness back to a level that didn't threaten to make him explode.

No matter how little actual alcohol was in the water, it had still affected Lan Zhan. Wei Wuxian would have laughed at him, but his imagination was busy throwing a nightmare scenario at him where Lan Zhan was forced to drink in public.

A tiny shift of Lan Zhan's body brought his thoughts swiftly back from those paths better not travelled. It would never happen anyway. He was always there to keep Lan Zhan safe from the evils of alcohol - he would drink it by the jug just to keep Lan Zhan from being forced into taking in a single sip.

Lan Zhan couldn't stay on his back for too long, especially not on the hard floor. It wasn't worth the inevitable pain and seizing up of damaged muscles, even though Lan Zhan would suffer through it willingly and silently. Wei Wuxian cursed himself for not planning this better but apart from hefting Lan Zhan up and carrying him to the bed - which would totally destroy the mood he was going for - there was nothing he could do. Getting some bedding and then getting Lan Zhan to roll onto it was an even worse idea.

They would make the best out if it, he decided, and tomorrow he would have one reason more to coddle Lan Zhan.

Instead, he went for the direct assault and pressed one hand against Lan Zhan's neck, over his pulse, and the other against the unmistakable proof of his arousal that was brilliantly framed by the red robe.

"So alcohol makes your horny then?" he asked in the most teasing tone he could muster.

In answer, Lan Zhan's hand moved at the speed of light to snatch Wei Wuxian's and pressed it down against his hardness. He moaned softly at the stimulation it brought.

"And shameless," Wei Wuxian added, mostly for his own benefit. He so loved seeing Lan Zhan unrestrained like this. He got a pout in return and the expression on Lan Zhan's usually stoic face made him laugh out loud. "Don't worry," he said quickly, "I'll take care of you." To prove that he wasn't making empty promises, he squeezed rather roughly. Lan Zhan's cock filled out his hand so very nicely, and Wei Wuxian loved feeling the unmistakable proof of Lan Zhan's want for him. No matter how well he controlled his expression and his breathing, he could never control this.

Wei Wuxian squeezed again.

He got a beautiful, loud gasp for his efforts, and Lan Zhan even pushed up into his hand. Wei Wuxian pressed him back down with a disappointed click of his tongue. "Stay still," he commanded.

"Wei Ying."

Oh, was that a whine? Wow, just a few drops and all of Lan Zhan's defenses were totally down.

"Do you want me to ride you, Lan Zhan?" he asked. Lan Zhan was already in the perfect position for that, after all - Wei Wuxian would only have to get their underrobes out of the way he could sink down…

A tiny shake of Lan Zhan's head a strained "no" made him stop from his efforts of getting his present out of its fabric wrapping.

"No?" he repeated full of disbelief. That was new. And Wei Wuxian hated it. Lan Zhan denying him? When he was so clearly hard and desperate for it?

As if he could he his thoughts Lan Zhan grabbed his right wrist hard enough to leave bruises. His eyes were open and he clearly was fighting to communicate through the haze of arousal, alcohol and his usual difficulty with words.

"I want you inside of me," he finally forced out.

Oh.

All of Wei Wuxian's spiraling-out-of-control thoughts came to a screeching halt. A dozen teasing replies came to his mind but one look at Lan Zhan's burning ears made him reconsider. He gently brushed the loose hair aside to see them better and smiled as gently as he could.

Okay. This was Lan Zhan's show, after all. He'd just forgotten about it for a moment in the haze of his own stupid want whenever he was confronted with Lan Zhan's hardness. He switched directions quickly, not at all unhappy about where this was going.

"Everything my husband wants."

Lan Zhan didn't seem to have heard him but stared up at him with a strange expression.

"Back then," he began, and it was clear that every word was an uphill battle for him, "when I was kneeling in the Jin banquet hall…" he stopped with an expression of helpless frustration.

"… when Jin Zixun, that idiot, tried to force you to drink," Wei Wuxian helped him out. He once again put his hand on Lan Zhan's pulse point and gently stroked the soft skin beneath his fingers. "And I swooped in to rescue you." He half-expected an indignant huff but Lan Zhan surprised him by fully relaxing his body and letting his head fall to the side until it was cradled by Wei Wuxian's hand.

"I wished you would just take hold of me," he whispered. "Watch me drink the wine and then gather me up in your arms and bring me far away."

And have your way with me.

Although unspoken, Wei Wuxian still heard the words clearly and swallowed hard. The idea that Lan Zhan - Hanguang-jun - wanted to be rescued at any point in his life was hard enough to take in, no matter that it was from something silly like a cup of wine. The fact that he wanted to be swept away by the Yiling Patriarch of all the people in the world…

"You still want that, don't you?" It wasn't a completely new realization, just one Wei Wuxian had never put into words before. "For me to gather you up and take you away. Protect you from the world. You don't need it but you want it."

A miserable nod was Lan Zhan's answer to that. He wasn't ashamed, not exactly, but it was obvious that he wasn't completely at ease with the idea either.

It now was Wei Wuxian's job to get him there.

"Make you mine," he hissed, trying for the tones he had used back then, so full of righteous anger and sheer fury at the unfairness of the world, and just like that the doom and gloom mood retreated back into the shadows where it belonged. "Put you down and keep you there."

This time, Lan Zhan's nod wasn't miserable but eager. Wei Wuxian could work with that.

"Okay," he murmured, more to himself than Lan Zhan. "I can do that."

But without the righteousness or the fury. Both of those had no place here. Neither in this new life of his nor between Lan Zhan and him.

The underrobe was already almost undone and it only took a few moments to get Lan Zhan's arms out of it. It made a rather poor bedding, comfort-wise, but visually it was striking to see Lan Zhan spread out on the red fabric.

He really needed to get some red fabrics and decorate their bed so he could arrange Lan Zhan like this while keeping him comfortable for a long time. A whole night maybe?

Lan Zhan on his back, completely spread out, every part of him easily accessible and just waiting to be teased and played with before being fucked - there was truly nothing else comparable to the rush of power and sheer naked want that image evoked in Wei Wuxian.

Nobody else would ever see him like this and that made it even sweeter.

The red ribbon, only loosely wrapped round his wrists, had fallen away completely so Wei Wuxian took it and wrapped it around Lan Zhan's right wrist, a mirror to the white one around his own. They had claimed each other this way during their wedding night - and countless times afterwards - but it still gave Wei Wuxian a special thrill to see Lan Zhan all wrapped up in his signature color.

"You are beautiful," Wei Wuxian praised absently while tracing the line of a whipping scar that dared to sneak over Lan Zhan's shoulder and almost down to his collarbone, "but never more beautiful than when you are under me. I need to put you on your back more often."

A slow blink and a barely discernible, but very pleased, smile was Lan Zhan's reaction. There was so little time for playing around like that - a quick press against the wall and being bent over a table was nothing new for either of them but Lan Zhan, in particular, liked to be teased and played with.

Lan Zhan had no patience for drawn-out foreplay when he was on top, and Wei Wuxian didn't want to be strung along like that either, but, to their surprise, they had found that their needs and wants totally flipped as soon as they switched positions.

Wei Wuxian found, to his surprise, that he didn't mind drawn-out foreplay when he was the one who got to actively do it; while Lan Zhan was perfectly happy lying there and taking whatever Wei Wuxian decided to give him.

For a moment, it irked Wei Wuxian that Lan Zhan had denied him a quick release but now he was looking forward to tease and eventually fuck his husband.

Lan Zhan shivered under the caress and let his thighs fall open a bit more; a silent offer for Wei Wuxian to kneel between them. He was hard, painfully so by the looks of it, but one wouldn't guess from his relaxed posture and even expression. Lan Zhan truly was far too good at hiding in plain sight.

He took his time to kneel comfortable between Lan Zhan's thighs and teased him by running a single finger up and down his cock. He got a beautiful full-body shiver and quickly swallowed moan for his efforts and smiled sweetly.

Lan Zhan shivered once again at the implicit threat of being teased until he begged for mercy and resolutely turned his head to the side.

"Oh no," Wei Wuxian admonished him immediately, "no hiding." He gently turned Lan Zhan's head back until they could look at each other again. "I'm not going to miss even one of your expressions and blinks." He shook his head in fond amusement. "I knew I should have given you more wine, to make your even more pliable."

"Please," Lan Zhan whispered and licked his lips in anticipation.

The gesture almost killed Wei Wuxian on the spot but he gathered what remained of his wits and, after a moment of deliberation, he tipped his finger into the remaining, undiluted, cup of wine.

"Be careful what you wish for," he whispered back.

He took his time as he painted Lan Zhan's lips with the wine and watched him lick first his fingers and then his lips clean in fascination.

"More," Lan Zhan demanded.

"No." Wei Wuxian put his now wine-less finger against Lan Zhan's lips. "That's enough for you." He anticipated the retaliating bite and let Lan Zhan have it. He leaned forward for a kiss. "I want you conscious and able to fully feel me inside of," he murmured before taking Lan Zhan's mouth in an almost brutal kiss and giving him no chance of protesting. "Okay?"

I want you to enjoy and remember this, he thought but he had enough self-preservation instinct to not say that out loud, in fear of being bitten more and not in the really fun way. Lan Zhan could be a real menace in that regard, but Wei Wuxian wouldn't want him to be any different.

He had resigned himself to live with the biting a long time ago.

Lan Zhan blinked at him, lazy like a satisfied cat, but at the same time he took Wei Wuxian's hand and pressed it against his erection.

"Fuck me," he said quietly. Clearly, the wine had lowered his inhibitions if he was able to speak his mind so plainly but not only his ears became red after the words hat been uttered.

Wei Wuxian, as always on the rare occasions he got to see it, was utterly charmed by the blush on his beautiful face. A flustered Lan Zhan also turned him on like not much else.

"Okay," he said - more to himself than Lan Zhan. "I hope I can be as good as I was in that fantasy of yours."

Lan Zhan's unimpressed face clearly communicated what he thought about that particular self-doubt.

"Wei Ying." There was a touch of impatience in his voice, and Wei Wuxian knew better than to tease him further right now.

Lan Zhan was able to easily take two fingers at once but Wei Wuxian was on a mission here. So he made a show of dipping his fingers into the bowl with oil waiting next to him and took the time to just circle Lan Zhan's entrance with a feather light touch, without even penetrating him. He got a slight gasp of delighted surprise for drawing things out like that and smirked in response.

"Are you sure you want me to stop playing with you?" he asked sweetly. He got an unimpressed look for that but Lan Zhan shifted a bit to allow him better access.

Wei Wuxian took his easy victory and indulged them both for a little while before easily slipping inside. After only a moment he slipped in a second finger, afraid that Lan Zhan might not get enough stimulation for it to feel good otherwise.

Lan Zhan was tight and hot inside and Wei Wuxian could have spent an eternity or two playing with him like that. His irregular breathing, his unconscious squirming, and the tiny moans, interspaced with barely discernible pleas, were just too much fun.

Later, when Lan Zhan was a wrung-out, oversensitive mess still begging for more with his eyes, Wei Wuxian would put his fingers into him again. Maybe. For now, the time for foreplay was over and Wei Wuxian could be just as ruthless as Lan Zhan when chasing his pleasure.

Just as Lan Zhan was about to whine his name again Wei Wuxian pushed into him. Hard and with one thrust until he was fully inside of him, just the way Lan Zhan liked it.

There had been a time, at the very beginning, when Wei Wuxian had been scared to take him like this, too afraid of hurting Lan Zhan, despite his steadfast assurances that he wanted it like that.

There had never been any doubt that he couldn't take it. Wei Wuxian had, too, after all, but still. In the beginning, despite their obvious lust for each other, they had been so afraid that their wants might not be compatible, after all.

What a silly thought. As if there was any aspect of life where they were not. They had learned together what they liked and needed, playing around and experimenting until they could divine what the other wanted after one quick look in the middle of a crowded street.

A breathless gasp was all that Lan Zhan allowed to escape now but his eyes closed in pleasure. He shifted up until his ass was almost in Wei Wuxian's lap, allowing a bit more movement and deeper penetration. To reward him, Wei Wuxian grabbed his wrists and pressed them against the floor to keep him pinned in place as he fucked him.

A sharp "no!" was all took to stop Lan Zhan's attempts to wrap his legs around Wei Wuxian's waist. He was still far away from being able to come, Wei Wuxian knew, and desperate for any stimulation that might help him get there.

"Just take it," Wei Wuxian told him and smiled in satisfaction when a particularly brutal thrust made Lan Zhan hiss in half pain, half pleasure.

"That's what you wanted, isn't it?" he continued. "Me taking you away and having my way with you."

There had never been a chance for them, back then, they both knew. Lan Zhan had still been too proud and stubborn to give in and Wei Wuxian had been too eaten up by resentful energy - as well as rage and plain hunger - to have any sexual urges whatsoever.

The only thing that had always been there was the affection between them, even when they both had thought it was hopeless.

To this day, Wei Wuxian was glad Lan Zhan's face was the last thing he ever saw in his first life, even while he hated himself for inflicting pain like that on the man he loved and who loved him in return.

Still, it was nice to think about might-have-beens in another, better world where he was able to be with Lan Zhan so much earlier.

He leaned down to whisper directly into Lan Zhan's ear: "I would have taken you away from the Jins. Wrapped you up in darkness and brought you somewhere safe. I would have stripped you of your mourning clothes, spread you out like a feast, and taken my pleasure from your body. Afterwards, I would have wrapped you up in black and red silk, claiming you on the outside, just as thoroughly as on the inside and paraded you in front of the whole world to show them all who you really belong to."

Lan Zhan clenched sharply around him at that and Wei Wuxian grinned and squeezed his wrists hard. There would be no bruises he knew, at least none that would stay for longer than a few hours at the most. Wei Wuxian was too weak and Lan Zhan's golden core too strong for bruises that lasted longer but it didn't matter. Lan Zhan's body was already permanently marked by Wei Wuxian in countless ways.

"Seems that you like the idea of being claimed. Inside and out. Clothes I choose and put on your body, wine I fed to you in your stomach and my seed dripping out of you because you're so well used that you can't keep it inside anymore."

He stole another kiss before he let go of Lan Zhan's left wrist. He blindly reached for the cup and painted Lan Zhan's lips once again with undiluted wine. Lan Zhan stared up at him, wordless, pupils blown wide with pleasure and sheer stupid want.

"You like to be used," Wei Wuxian repeated and this time Lan Zhan not only tightened around him but also whimpered. His eyes closed, not in denial but helpless, instinctual, surrender.

"Yes." An admission and a plea both, spoken so softly it was almost lost between the noise they made.

Wei Wuxian could draw out the fantasy even more, he knew, paint a picture even more vivid and detailed than the one his few words had sketched out.

Another time.

Not now, not with Lan Zhan moaning, panting and whimpering every time Wei Wuxian pushed into him. Not with Lan Zhan, drunk on wine and pleasure, desperately trying to stay still and just take what he was given.

Wei Wuxian grabbed his wrists even harder and fully pressed him down on the floor to reward him for his compliance. He once again took his right hand away but Lan Zhan didn't move. He only hissed when Wei Wuxian wrapped his fingers around his cock and squeezed.

"You're doing so well," he praised, fully aware the words, coupled with some quick, harsh strokes, would push Lan Zhan over the edge for good.

Wei Wuxian would have loved to fuck Lan Zhan all through his orgasm and beyond that, to watch him transform into an over stimulated mess begging for mercy, but the truth was he could never hold out much longer than Lan Zhan himself.

They came at almost the same time, with just enough delay for Wei Wuxian to appreciate the beauty of Lan Zhan finding his release, before he was overwhelmed by his own.

He fought for his awareness and kept enough of it to not collapse like a log onto Lan Zhan. He went for a controlled fall instead and ended up with his head pillowed on Lan Zhan's chest without even slipping out of him. He was curled up rather uncomfortably but too wrung out to really care, let alone do anything about it. His right hand was free but his left was still holding on to Lan Zhan's right. Out of the corner of his eyes he could see the white and red ribbons lying together in a puddle of silk. The picture made him smile.

Lan Zhan sluggishly moved to intertwine their fingers, to be able to hold on himself.

He could feel the contentment radiating of Lan Zhan, and it kept the guilt of crushing him into the hard floor at bay for the time being.

Lan Zhan held on to his hand with a single-minded stubbornness as he was wont to do - Wei Wuxian had stopped thinking about why he did that every time he could a long time ago out of sheer self-preservation for his sanity.

Now, Lan Zhan was a relaxed, blissed out mess under him, and Wei Wuxian wasn't feeling much better. A slight shift to ease the tension in his back and his cock slipped out of Lan Zhan's body - a quiet, unhappy sound was Lan Zhan's only reaction. Wei Wuxian hated it and moved enough to be able to press a kiss against the ugly branding mark on Lan Zhan's chest.

"I'll be inside of you again soon enough," he promised. "I'll feed you wine whenever you want, I'll fuck you whenever you want - just tell me what you need." He swallowed hard. "Please," he added. He knew how hard it was for Lan Zhan to articulate his desires.

The Second Jade of Lan. Strong, gifted, respected like few others and beautiful beyond words. And still Lan Zhan deserved so much more and Wei Wuxian was determined to fulfill each and every one of those deeply hidden desires Lan Zhan had brutally suppressed for almost all of his life.

"I'll give you everything you want."

"I already have everything I could ever want."

Wei Wuxian laughed at that, to keep the tears at bay. "Then you're selling yourself under your worth. By a lot."

"Mn."

"Seriously. Just tell me what you want and I'll find a way to give it to you."

No verbal answer but Lan Zhan wrapped his left leg around Wei Wuxian's to keep him in place. The implication was clear, and Wei Wuxian once again swallowed down the tears of fondness that threatened to overwhelm him.

He pressed another kiss against Lan Zhan's skin, on the spot directly over his heart.

"I can carry you to the bed and clean you up," he offered. 'Cleaning up' meaning that he would play a bit more with Lan Zhan's body without the urgency of getting off.

Wei Wuxian couldn't tolerate it, but Lan Zhan, despite being so sensitive to touch - or maybe because of it - loved some careful teasing after he'd been fucked.

Sometimes it lead to another round, but most often Wei Wuxian just fingered him for some time before cleaning him up.

"You can put me into your clothes anytime you want," Lan Zhan said eventually. "I'd love to be wrapped in fabric that smells of you, knowing that something that has lain close to your skin now covers mine." Wei Wuxian could feel as well as hear him swallow. "I am also not opposed to your other proposition."

Other proposition? What the hell? It took Wei Wuxian a moment to remember his insane ramblings but when he did it was his turn to whimper.

"Please, don't talk like that. You'll kill me, Lan Zhan," he whined helplessly.

The mental of image of Lan Zhan in red and black, fucked open and with traces of Wei Wuxian's come on the inside of his thighs, assaulted him and he whimpered as his spent cock valiantly tried to rise again.

'Tried' being the operative word here. Lan Zhan had wrung him dry for the time being.

Lan Zhan, as always, was as merciful in this as he was with anything else. Which meant totally merciless.

"I'm yours to use as you wish. Feed me wine, dress me in your colors, take and mark me for all the world to see. I wish to be known as yours," he declared in the same tone he used to speak out his rulings as the Chief Cultivator.

Wei Wuxian's poor heart had no stamina for this, so he just pressed his face against  Lan Zhan's chest.

"You'll be the death of me," he murmured.

Lan Zhan shifted them around until they were both lying on their sides, facing each other. A slight grimace what all that betrayed the pain in his back.

"Don't talk like that. Please," he requested in a much smaller voice and Wei Wuxian, dumbstruck at the sudden change in mood, nodded wordlessly before he leaned in to kiss Lan Zhan in apology.

"You're so good to me, indulging my every whim." I don't deserve you, he almost added but he didn't want to sour Lan Zhan's mood further. A faint frown showed him that Lan Zhan has heard his unspoken words anyway.

"You deserve it," Lan Zhan said simply. "Everything you want and that I can provide I will give to you. I will find a way for anything else, as well."

Wei Wuxian laughed shakily. "You've given me plenty, Lan Zhan. Your home, your body, your love," he choked up in the middle of his recital and fell silent.

Your endless devotion.

One end of the chain was falling over Lan Zhan's shoulder, and he absently wrapped it around his finger and tugged. Lan Zhan easily went with the movement and allowed himself to be pulled in until his forehead was resting against Wei Wuxian's shoulder.

Wei Wuxian pulled and pushed until he was the one lying on his back and Lan Zhan was half on top of him. With one hand he grabbed the red underrobe and draped it over both of them to ward of the nighttime chill.

There were no more words after this. Wei Wuxian mindlessly stroked Lan Zhan's back, over and over, feeling each and every one of Lan Zhan's scars through the thin material and traced the most prominent of them with his fingertips. Lan Zhan couldn't feel much of the caresses, he knew, but the repetitive motion was nonetheless soothing for both of them. He could sense that Lan Zhan had withdrawn into that special place he tended to go sometimes. A place deep inside his mind where not even Wei Wuxian could follow him into, where he found peace and comfort when the world got too overwhelming.

Ripping him out of there was a cruel thing to do, Wei Wuxian had learned. He already knew Lan Zhan, inside and out, there was no reason to push further.

"Lan Zhan, I'm going to move us," he announced quietly, afraid of startling Lan Zhan with sudden movement. A tiny nod was his only confirmation and assurance that Lan Zhan retained some shred of awareness of his surroundings.

He smiled, once again overcome with immense fondness and love.

Lan Zhan, when he was exhausted and felt safe enough to fall into this state, became pliant in a way that would be concerning if it didn't happen so seldom and only between the two of them.

Wei Wuxian gently and carefully coaxed him into a sitting position and held the third and last cup, filled with plain water, against his lips.

"Drink," he commanded softly. It was too late, and they were too wrung out to eat something properly, but he wanted Lan Zhan to have something apart from alcohol before they retired. He fed Lan Zhan a small piece of candy before grabbing one for himself, followed by more water. He would make sure that Lan Zhan ate properly tomorrow. He had been looking forwards to a whole day of taking care of him like that ever since their plans had fallen into place, a few short days ago.

Lan Zhan complied without even a hint of resistance, earning himself a kiss and more praise before Wei Wuxian pulled him upright, intend on leading him to the bed. But as soon as they were standing Lan Zhan swayed and collapsed against his chest. His eyes were closed and his arms loosely wrapped around Wei Wuxian's shoulders. He was in no condition to even take a few steps.

"Oh, Lan Zhan." He concentrated on keeping his voice low. "I've really wrecked you, hmm? Don't worry, I'll take care of you for once."

His husband was tall and muscular - but so was Wei Wuxian. With a new golden core so weak that there was barely any chance of making something out of it he had concentrated on building up his physical strength so that he could at least be somewhat Lan Zhan's equal again. His hard training paid off in moments like this, when he got to carry a drowsy Lan Zhan around.

Lan Zhan, as usual in moments like this, let himself be picked up without a fuss and more or less melted into Wei Wuxian's hold. He sighed contently and hid his face by pressing it against Wei Wuxian's neck as he was carried to bed.

Wei Wuxian was once again careful and slow as he arranged Lan Zhan on his back. "Shh," he soothed him when he made an unhappy sound at being positioned like that. The red robe was still under him. "Let me clean you up and then you can shift to lie on your side."

Lan Zhan had come so far from sleeping on his back, no matter what. Wei Wuxian was proud of getting him to admit that it hurt and that it was okay to find another, better position to sleep in, damn the rules to hell.

These days, Lan Zhan tended to sleep on his side, often with Wei Wuxian behind him, holding him, although they switched, depending on their mood and needs.

Tonight Lan Zhan was the one in need of being held together. No matter how admirably he had held up, this fulfillment of an age-old fantasy - as well as allowing himself to be so vulnerable - had taken a lot out of him. Now it was Wei Wuxian's job to hold and protect him until he could rebuild the walls he needed to be able to function.

He gently brushed a strand of hair out of Lan Zhan's face. "Ready?" he asked softly.

Lan Zhan wordlessly and obediently spread his legs. This was something Wei Wuxian needed to do after fucking him: To make sure that he was okay. Also, it was fun to play a little bit more with such a beautiful, responsive body like Lan Zhan's.

He teasingly traced Lan Zhan's soft cock and grinned when it filled slightly at the contact. He didn't expect much more, but it was nice that his touch could elicit any reaction at all so soon.

"You're so good to me," he praised and took Lan Zhan into his mouth. He played around for a few moments but it soon became clear that Lan Zhan was as wrung out as Wei Wuxian himself felt. He let him slip out of his mouth and gave one last lick to the tip before sitting up again.

Lan Zhan looked at him with barely open eyes and a slight smile on his face. The lightest touch to the inside of his thighs encouraged him to spread them open more, once again giving Wei Wuxian full access.

He hissed softly when Wei Wuxian pushed two fingers inside of him, gently stretching him further and teasing his inner walls.

"Too much?" In answer, Lan Zhan clenched around him, as if to keep him inside. Wei Wuxian laughed. "Okay, message received."

It had been so long since the last time they could indulge each other and play around like that. Lan Zhan's beautiful responsiveness threatened to take his breath away.

Lan Zhan closed his eyes again and allowed his body to fully relax. Wei Wuxian fingered him bit longer, teasing and stretching him in the hope to keep him open enough overnight to be able to take his cock without preparation in the morning.

"You're so slick with oil and my seed," he said eventually. Lan Zhan shuddered at the words. "Can you feel it dripping out of you?" To illustrate his point he withdrew his fingers and made sure to spread the mixture on the inside of Lan Zhan's thighs. "You're totally open now, unable to keep anything inside of you without help."

He watched in fascination as Lan Zhan soundlessly repeated "without help" while looking at something far beyond anyone else's perception. There was the faintest trace of tears in his eyes but Wei Wuxian knew they weren't from pain but pure exhaustion and overstimulation.

He needed to figure something out about that, he decided. For the future.

He traced Lan Zhan's rim again, barely putting the tip of his finger in. One last caress and he pulled away, cruelly ignoring Lan Zhan's protesting whine.

"Shh, it's enough for now. You'll be sore enough in the morning as it is." Especially after Wei Wuxian had fucked him again, not that Lan Zhan knew how soon he would be taken again. It wasn't something they had done before and Wei Wuxian was looking forwards to his reaction to being fucked first thing in the morning, while still feeling used from the night before.

He planned to put Lan Zhan on his hands and knees for it and the thought alone was almost enough to arouse him again.

Almost.

He wasn't that young anymore, after all.

He grabbed the clean, wet piece of cloth he had prepared beforehand. By now it had dried out a bit and was damp enough to be of use for cleaning up without having rivulets of water ruining their bedding. He spared a minimal bit of spiritual energy to warm it up before wiping the traces of their lovemaking from Lan Zhan's skin. An already fading bruise on his left hip, right over the last trail of the longest whipping scar, made him smile in satisfaction.

He had done that. Marked Lan Zhan thoroughly not only with his come but also on his skin.

He gently wiped away the traces of tears before leaning in for more kissing. Lan Zhan barely responded, apart from a pleased hum and the faintest chasing when Wei Wuxian withdrew again to admire his handiwork.

"Mine," he whispered as he traced the scar and the bruise. Even the brutal scarring, in its own way, was a mark the Yiling Patriarch had put on Hanguang-Jun. He put some pressure behind his light touch to encourage Lan Zhan to close his legs before maneuvering him to lie on his right side.

If one looked very closely, there was a scar on Lan Zhan's right leg, where it had been broken so long ago. The injury had fully healed decades ago but due to the lack of proper care when it had been fresh not even Lan Zhan's formidable spiritual energy had managed to prevent it from scarring and sometimes, when the weather turned cold and damp, he had a limp, so slight only Wei Wuxian could even tell it was there at all.

Lan Zhan's body was a battlefield of scars, a constant reminder of what he had not only endured but survived, a testament to his immense strength in body and mind both.

They were beautiful, an integral part of Lan Zhan that made him the man he was. Still, Wei Wuxian hated them even more than he loved them and longed to be able to take them away. Lan Zhan should only ever have lived a life in comfort, loved by all, without any pain or misery whatsoever.

Lan Zhan was still half-lying on the red robe. Wei Wuxian shifted around until he could grab the part he was kneeling on to wrap up Lan Zhan fully in it. Lan Zhan tugged at the hem and drew it tighter around himself with a contended sigh.

The sight was adorable.

"I'll find a way to let you wear my clothes without anyone else noticing," he promised. "Something red or black, carefully hidden beneath your white and blue." He was so happy that Lan Zhan now wore blue again, sometimes even in the darker shades previously only seen on his brother. "You'll have something of mine against your skin every day." He absently fiddled with the cloud emblem of the ribbon securely tied around his wrist and adjusted his own black robe that was threatening to slide off his shoulder.

He wasn't sure if Lan Zhan had even heard his words or if he had already quietly slipped into sleep.

Wei Wuxian let him be and began to carefully untangle the filigree chain from his hair. Exhaustion was hitting him hard by now and his fingers were almost too clumsy to do it but he persevered and finally held the silver chain in his hands. Not even a single hair had been sacrificed. He carefully put it to the side - he would braid it into Lan Zhan's hair in the late morning, after their lovemaking, a very necessary bath and breakfast, and after Wei Wuxian was conscious enough to actually do more than stare blearily into the world.

He leaned over to whisper directly into Lan Zhan's ear, knowing that the chances of being heard were slim. "Tomorrow you'll be all mine, remember? It's your day off from being Chief Cultivator, your brother promised to take over for the day because you need to rest." He took Lan Zhan's hair and quickly put it into an rather messy braid he let fall over Lan Zhan's left shoulder. That done he pressed a kiss against his temple.

"I'll take good care of you. In every way. Tomorrow you'll be mine and mine alone."

He looked forward to that. He hoped they could find the time to play some music together. He had been working on a new melody, an answer to Lan Zhan's love confession to him, and was eager to show it off and see how Lan Zhan would incorporate the guqin into it.

They would spend the day wrapped up in each other, not thinking about anything but their pleasure, doing whatever they wanted. A perfect day, long in the planning since Lan Zhan's duties were threatening to crush him and it was killing Wei Wuxian to have to watch helplessly as the man he loved faded away right in front of his eyes.

Wei Wuxian had been diligent in not only fulfilling Lan Zhan's deepest wish tonight but also to thoroughly tire him out in an attempt to give him his first deep sleep in far too long. Wrapping Lan Zhan into his own clothes, claiming him in every way possible, feeding him wine and reminding him who he ultimately belonged to - all that had been carefully designed to allow Lan Zhan to let his guard down, to slip into that special place where he could find the solitude he needed, to fully relax and allow him to let himself be pampered by his loving husband.

"All mine," he repeated as he laid down behind Lan Zhan and put an arm around his waist to hold him in place. He couldn't resist made a quick detour down to squeeze Lan Zhan's soft cock gently before putting his hand low on his belly.

Lan Zhan, definitely deeply asleep by now, responded by pushing back until his behind was pressed against Wei Wuxian's crotch, needy even while deeply asleep. With that movement he gave Wei Wuxian enough space to slip his right arm underneath his neck. He knew he would curse himself for that later, when his arm would be asleep and hurting from the weight, but he was willing to pay the price.

"Greedy," Wei Wuxian accused him, his own eyes already closed. The last candle still alight had flickered out by its own only moments before. He pressed his face against Lan Zhan's neck and inhaled deeply. "Tomorrow," he promised drowsily, already more than half-asleep, his left hand still possessively splayed over Lan Zhan's midsection.

The last thing he vaguely noticed was Lan Zhan's left hand reaching up, seeking out his right and once again entwining their fingers, red and white silk once more ending up tangled up in each other as well.