Chapter Text
Exhaustion and thirst. That is all Ellie feels as she keeps running as fast as her legs can take her. Growls and screams behind her compel her to never stop yet her body is on the brink of collapsing. There has to be somewhere to hide. An old abandoned factory could be it. Those usually have infected inside too, she remembers but still tries her luck. It seems she'll get her rest after all, the rooms are empty - except for the dead bodies covering the floor. Lately she finds no one. It's been three days since her last hometown was overwhelmed by a horde. Nobody made it. Nobody except her obviously. Ellie sighs as she remembers Riley and her aching need to know when will her turn be momentarily comes back. The next day she keeps pressing forward, trying to get back to the place she once called home but hasn't seen in 15 years. Someone must have made it, Ellie keeps telling herself but there's a sinking feeling she's wrong. Everywhere she goes, everywhere she looks there's only infected. And her fears aren't unfunded because as she reaches Jackson she finds it broken and covered in spores. Not a single soul remains. Ellie's knees fail her and she falls to the ground, observing this last haven turn into another nightmarish city. No, no, no, not here too, Ellie cries in silence. If she were to see Joel right now she'll surely run to hug him - she still misses him - but she'll probably yell at him too.
Look, look what you condemned me to, this is what awaited me, no Dina, no JJ, no you, no Maria, no home, no one made it, it's just me Joel, was it worth it? Ellie keeps crying though she feels something is looking at her. She turns to the side but whatever it is runs away. It's hard to tell what it is but Ellie can tell it's small and skinny. Perhaps it's a stalker. If that's what it is, it once was a kid. This only makes her feel more lost. She then looks in front again and sees a figure coming towards her. A big part of her is telling her to run but if Jackson fell what remains? I'm alone, absolutely alone, Ellie is shaking in fear but she's ready to rest forever. If Dina isn't here then what's even the point? Perhaps it finally is her turn. The tall figure gets nearer and Ellie laughs sardonically as she identifies it. It's only fitting you'll be my ending, Ellie thinks and even if it's her she's sorry Abby turned. Saving her all those years ago and letting her go, all the fights and all the tears only for her to end up like this...
Ellie could come up with a suitable poem for their last moments but the figure is now running towards her. Ellie lowers her head, getting ready to be mauled, maybe bitten several times or even torn to pieces. Instead she's grabbed by her shoulder, lifted and shaken by the powerful hands of Abby as if she were nothing but a leaf.
"Wake the fuck up, you idiot, and run!" Abby yells.
Ellie gasps and sits. Her forehead is covered in sweat. She looks to the side and even touches her partner. Relieved to notice Dina is alive and well she sighs and passes a hand over her face. Dina stirs and moves to the side, she opens her eyes and looks at her.
"Bad dream?" Dina asks, this has happened before, they are used to this.
"Yeah, sorry," Ellie swallows.
"Don't be, just talk to me," Dina sits and observes her. She knows her wife enough to understand that something is bothering her.
Ellie sighs and chooses honesty, "is just… the same dream but worse… and how it ended… it was weird."
"In what way?" Dina caresses Ellie's back and in her infinite patience decides to stay awake to listen to this nonsense.
"Well you know… it's always the same… me… running, alone, can't find anyone, hopeless but in this one I'm older, much older and I was… away from here and trying to come back but then," Ellie covers her face with her maimed hand, she's on the brink of tears. It was just a dream but it felt so real, so ominous, "Jackson was… gone, everyone dead and… I just…" Ellie sobs and Dina holds her.
"It's just a dream," Dina reminds her, "we always check the perimeter, I installed new traps, I'll keep us safe," she reassures her and in part it works. Ellie starts calming down, her tears stop and she holds Dina closer. There's safety in Dina's competence. If there's someone she can trust is Dina. "You won't be alone, babe," Dina insists and almost makes Ellie cry again. "But tell me what else bothers you…"
As always, Dina just knows her so well it's almost spooky, Ellie sighs and gets ready. It might have been just a dream but somehow she feels guilty for having to mention her again. "I saw something coming, right when I discovered Jackson all covered in spores… I thought it was an infected but as it came to me… as I surrendered it shook me and told me to wake up…" Dina nods and Ellie looks at her, she feels miserable for what she's about to say but says it anyway, "it was Abby."
Dina looks away and takes her hands from Ellie. She holds herself as she breathes in and out very slowly. Ellie swallows and waits. "Did she try to hurt you in that dream?"
"No, she… saved me?"
Dina looks at her and Ellie isn't certain what is going on in her head. "Well… you did release her that last time…" she holds Ellie's hand, "sorry I just… everything that happened… it's been five years since all that but-"
"Babe, I don't blame you, I'll never blame you for getting annoyed or angry that I remember or name her…"
"I'm not expecting you to pretend nothing happened," Dina points out, "I just… I guess I'm tired of how much she took from you… how much you got consumed in it."
"I know…"
"I just want you here with me and JJ."
"I'm not going anywhere, I swear…" Ellie holds her tightly, "I love you."
Dina's arms rest to her side but slowly she hugs her back. "I love you too… but I meant what I said to you years ago… I'm not doing this again. Ever."
"I won't put you through that, I don't want to leave. Never again," Ellie swears and hopes one day Dina will believe in her.
Her wife sighs and nods, she seems tired but she still caresses Ellie’s hand. “I guess it’s good that… in this dream at least she, uhm… she was good to you.”
“I don’t know if I would put it like that,” Ellie furrows her brow, “she called me idiot .”
Dina chuckles, “honestly after all that you two went through that’s almost a compliment.”
Ellie shakes her head and smiles weakly, “yeah, maybe.” It’s been years already yet it somehow still feels weird to be able to make light of this woman that once filled all of Ellie’s mind.
“Let’s go back to sleep,” Dina suggests. Ellie nods, kisses her and hugs her. Right here in her arms she finds peace once more and sleep comes more easily.
Dina is right, it was just a dream.