Chapter Text
Izuku felt dizzy, maybe even delirious. He didn’t know what was going on around him, his surroundings blurred in an ombré of different colors. The colors almost looked as if they were melting together. If he was being honest, it was beautiful. Izuku wondered if he could spend all his time in this world. It was so different, so happy, so stress relieving. Why did it feel so much happier here than in the real world?
Izuku stumbled around his dorm trying to find his way around while in his state of intoxication. It’s not like he did this often.. right? He couldn’t really remember how many times he’d smoked marijuana or snorted cocaine. It’s not like it was that important to remember. To be fair, it was just one of those days. Though the term ‘one of those days’ is relative to almost every day in Izuku’s life. It’s not like he can help it though, he’s been addicted for years. Though nobody in UA has caught him yet, and he was determined to keep it that way.
The blur of colors zooming around his vision in front of him looked somewhat similar to his balcony door, and Izuku decided to go outside and get some air. He’s been addicted to drugs for so long that it didn’t affect him too much anymore. He could still think straight and get around, somewhat, but Izuku hoped that the effect of pure bliss never left him. He stepped (tripped) out onto the balcony and leaned over the railing.
He giggled as the wind whipped around his mess of green curls and tickled the tip of his nose. The stars were blurred together in the blackness of the night sky and Izuku wondered yet again why reality couldn’t be so peaceful like this. He slowly uncurled his fists from the balcony rails and sat down on the cold concrete of his balcony floor. Izuku drifted into a peaceful sleep after getting high for the fourth time this week.
Painfully opening his eyes in what seemed like only seconds later, he gasped for fresh air, feeling confused and lightheaded. ‘Jesus fucking Christ,’ Izuku thought as he slowly pushed himself up off of the concrete floor of his balcony. His head was pounding and he was sore all over.
‘You’d think I’d get used to this, huh?’ The truth was, Izuku never got used to the hangovers, but they were a small price to pay for the exhilaration the drugs gave him every night. He looked around until the sun blinded him and he hissed and fell back on the ground. Of course his day would have such a wonderful start like this. Of fucking course. He quickly looked to his right to check the time then realized he was literally outside on his balcony.
‘I’m such an idiot, how the fuck did I end up out here.’ He ran back inside and slammed the sliding door shut as hard as he could. He looked at his clock in dismay. It was 8:30 am. School started an hour ago.
“Shit, shit, shit, shit.” Izuku colorfully cursed as he tugged his uniform on and ran out the dorms. The trees and sidewalks all blended together in a fuzzy hue as he sprinted to the UA building. He could never even begin to describe a more horrible feeling than sprinting at 8 in the morning while in the middle of a god-awful hangover. His chest rose quickly up and down as he panted with sweat dripping down the side of his face. He finally made it to his class after what felt like years of running non-stop.
Izuku stared at the much too tall 1-A classroom door and almost fainted at the abrupt stop from his consistent sprinting. He sighed heavily as he begrudgingly opened the door. His hangover wasn’t doing him any favors this morning and he already knew he looked like shit because he felt like shit.
‘Did I forget my tie? Fucking hell.’ He opened the door to 18 pairs of eyes staring directly at him, some in curiosity, others in concern and worry, and one in cold anger. Oh, that was probably Aizawa-sensei. Yes, he definitely looked like shit, he concluded.
“Midoriya.” Aizawa stated simply, but with a resonant anger blended in nicely with it. “Why are you coming into class an hour late?”
‘Ahhh, fuckity fuckers, I forgot to decide on an excuse. I guess I could say I wasn’t feeling well… or maybe I should just be honest and say I woke up late. Or I could say I got lost.. wait that doesn’t make any sense, I basically live here. I couldn’t find my tie? That’s not a lie. Uhhhhh, oh god, how long has it been? Maybe I should-‘
“Midoriya! When I ask a question I expect an answer and not mumbling. Speak up.” Aizawa demanded with plenty of harshness in his tone.
His heart almost stopped at the harshness in Aizawa’s tone. With sweaty palms, he meekly stumbled over his words and with lots of tact, stated, “Uhm- I uh, sorry sensei.. I um got los- wait. I mean I woke up late. Yeah, that. Haha..”
‘What the fuck is wrong with me. I can't believe I almost said I got lost. I’m so stupid.’
“Right. Stay after class. I need to talk to you.” He said seriously, leaving no room for any argument.
“I wonder what’s wrong with him,” Izuku heard being quietly whispered by one of his classmates. They continued with, “Yeah he looks dead on his feet.”
“Did he get any sleep?”
“Man, I kinda feel bad for him.. getting yelled at by sensei sucks.”
“SHUT THE FUCK UP EXTRAS.”
“Jesus calm down Bakugo,” These snippets of conversation were only small bits of the gossip spiraling around the classroom that Izuku could even begin to comprehend.
“QUIET! I’m continuing the lesson now. Listen or leave.” Aizawa quickly shut the class up after that and the mumbles stopped.
Izuku sat down at his seat ignoring all the concerned glances and shit. His head spun as he desperately tried to pay attention to the lesson, but all he heard was incoherent half-sentences that barely made any sense in his brain. How the hell was he supposed to get through the rest of this week with no one noticing his obviously terrible state? Thank god this was the only class of the day. He reached down into his backpack to grab his notebook in an attempt to write some notes to look over later, but since he’s so obviously skilled at everything, he knocked over his backpack and everything spilled out across the floor in a splash of school supplies and other random trinkets.
“What are you, fucking stupid, damn Deku?! Do you need a fucking babysitter for every goddamn second you’re alive? Jesus, get your shit together. You look fucking ugly, like you got into a train wreck or some shit.” Katsuki kindly screamed in his ear as small explosions popped and sparked in his palms, visibly showing his anger if you weren’t brave enough to look at his wrinkly face. Izuku slightly giggled to himself at the thought of Katsuki’s wrinkly face.
“THE HELL ARE YOU LAUGHING AT?! I’LL BEAT YOUR ASS, SHITTY DEKU!” Katsuki fumed and brought his hands up to Izuku’s face in a threatening manner.
“That’s quite enough. Bakugo, get back in your seat. Midoriya, pick up your school supplies, please, and stop disrupting my lesson. You’re already in enough trouble as is, problem child.” Aizawa stated smoothly, again leaving no room for interruption as the entire class moved their gaze away of whatever the fuck just happened between Midorya and Bakugo, back towards their teacher.
Unfortunately, after Izuku begrudgingly picked up his spilled supplies and gathered himself, he had nothing to distract himself from his aching head and body. Katsuki only made it ten times worse. ‘Thanks a lot for that, dickwad.’ He thought to himself, progressively becoming more pissed off at him.
God, he could really use a smoke right now to get his mind off of the constant pain the hangover caused him. He knew it was such a bad routine and habit, but having a smoke during a hangover always made it feel so much better in the moment. He was such a disaster, but he’s always been like this. Recently, it’s just been a lot harder to hide as he becomes more addicted to the feeling of the high either from drugs or other methods. Honestly, he was willing to try anything as long as he could feel the peaceful feeling of bliss.
He thought back to how this even started, and how he even got himself stuck in this shit anyways. He thinks it’s been going on for around two years, but he’s not really sure. All he knows is that he started after getting into UA, around when the USJ incident ended. Things were really rough back then, he had so much pent up stress, anger, and emotions he couldn’t even begin to understand with absolutely no way to release them. His relationship with his mother began to diminish, as she tried to force him to choose her over hero work and putting himself in danger to save others. She was selfish about it, and very manipulative as well. He knows she meant the best for him, but the way she went about it was truly awful. To pick between his mother and his dream was an impossible task, and she knew it. After that, he knew he needed a way to release everything he was feeling and escape from this reality he was unfortunately trapped in.
During a train ride to UA, he overheard some sketchy looking young adults speaking in hushed tones about something he couldn’t quite hear. He listened in, and eventually realized they were talking about selling drugs, but couldn’t find any buyers easily without getting into trouble. He had never thought about drugs before in his life, and was always firmly against it, but that picture-perfect perspective slowly began to crumble into nothing as he continued to listen. This would be the best way to get his mind off of all the stress and depression caused by everything around him, he hastily decided. Everything started with just one conversation with a bunch of random sellers, and it was smooth sailing from there. He wasn’t sure why they trusted him so easily, but he guessed they didn’t care because he had the money and had no personal connections to them. His first high was arguably the best experience he’s ever had in his entire life. It felt like— someone’s rough hand shaking his shoulder? That doesn’t sound right.
“—doriya! Midoriya! Can you hear me? Class is over. You’ve been zoned out for a while.”
He vaguely registered Aizawa-sensei’s voice over the chaos in his mind. That was certain,y not a fun way to be pulled out of a daydream.
“Midoriya.”
“Sensei?” Izuku replied curiously. He almost forgot he was supposed to stay after class to talk about whatever it is Aizawa was worried about. That man is always worried about something, maybe he needs some pills too. That thought brought a small smile to Izuku’s face. Gosh, he always cracked himself up.
“—there’s something wrong. I’m just trying to give you some time to talk to me about it without all the commotion.”
“Huh?” Izuku replied, clearly with a lot of careful consideration.
“What? Were you not listening to me, Midoriya?” Aizawa looked very concerned. It made Izuku chuckle a little on the inside. Why would anyone care so much about him?
“Sorry, I think I’m just a little distracted right now. Can I head out? I’ve got a massive headache and sleep waits for no man.” He tried to lighten the mood a little, desperately hoping this would allow Aizawa to send him on his merry way. He wasn’t actually planning on getting any sleep, but he needed an excuse to leave.
Aizawa sighed heavily, “Alright, clearly I’m not getting anywhere with you today, but I expect answers about your recent strange behavior. You haven’t acted this way before, so you can understand why I’m concerned. My students’ health will always be my first priority. You’re free to leave, but I expect you here before class on Monday to explain to me what’s going on.”
“Thank you, Sensei. Yeah, I’ll try to be here before class, I guess. See you later.” Izuku trudged out the door, not caring that his final words were laced with disrespect. He was so tired and done with everything that just happened; and was ready to finally light a cigarette and call it a day.
Aizawa stared at his student as he carried himself weakly out of his classroom door, wondering where he went wrong. He had a lot of things to work on if his own student couldn’t even bring himself to trust him and tell him what’s going on. He sighed again and realized how badly he needed a nap.