Chapter Text
Five years old. That's how old you were when you decided you were tired of the corruption and injustices suffered by the hands of greedy individuals on Earth, just having lost your pet ferret due to your family not caring enough to afford the proper medicare.
You remember sniffling and begging at the feet of the nurse. She merely stared down at you in disgust as a trail of snot cascaded down your face.
“Listen, I don't know why a little kid like you is here alone, but you don't have the funds, so we can’t take the little rodent in.” She drawled, letting her icy-cold gaze rack over your hunched, tiny body, which carried your beloved ferret. She eventually grabbed her nose bridge in frustration when she realized you weren't budging.
She muttered something incoherent, sighing for the umpteenth time, looking at you once more like you were merely trash.
The nurse, whom you’ve come to refer to as constipated face, reached for her back pocket and pulled out a walkie-talkie.
Your sniffling slightly ceased as you wiped the tears off your cheeks furiously, a gummy-smile dawning on your face.
Maybe she is calling for one of the vets to come!
“Hey, can one of you guys send security around the main entrance, we got a whiny kid holding a dead ferret that’s possibly hazardous. Thanks.”
At that statement, the smile immediately vanished from your face, almost like it was never there, and you started bawling furiously, clinging to the nurse's legs as you screamed for her to help your ferret.
“Please, nurse, he’s not dead yet! I felt his heartbeat.” You bellowed, hitting her knees with your small fists as your ferret lay on your lap, taking shallow, coarse breaths.
Onlookers looked at the scene in annoyance, only some looking sympathetic before their attention was drawn back to their screen, becoming fixated on their phone instead of the travesty in front of them.
Your throat had never hurt as much as it did that day as you pierced the hospital with wails of sorrow when the security officers roughly pulled you away from the nurse, who sent a gracious smile to security personnel.
Your ferret’s body clunked to the ground in a sickening thud as he shakily opened his eyes to see you trying to escape the grasp of the security.
The other security officer quickly put on some gloves and grabbed your ferret before rushing out as you felt your lungs unable to breathe any more air. Next thing you know, you went limp and roused awake at a police station where your irritated parents sat.
Your throat begged for water, feeling as though knives had scraped the inside raw, as you looked at the silhouette of your parents before willing yourself to see them properly.
Your father’s sneer in your direction gave you all the signs to know you were going to be having a sleepless night of reprimanding and verbal abuse. Truthfully, your parents never approved of your pet ferret, one you found on the streets when you were four.
However, no one could stop you from keeping the ferret, your only best friend in a world that treated you like an outcast.
You bit your lip to prevent yourself from wailing again as you recounted memories of watching Bambie with your ferret, a movie that was one of the ancient relics of Disney, playfully wishing he could talk to you and that maybe one day you could live in a world with lush foliage and kind creatures.
Mulling back to the present, you fought back tears, glaring at everyone in the room, vowing to one day escape this hellhole and make sure people never needlessly suffer the way you did.
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Awakening from cryosleep mimicked one of those dreams where you awake in a second, almost as if time didn’t pass.
However, five years did pass in this case, and you definitely felt the hunger and thirst of not feeding at all during that time.
Still groggy, your blurry vision steadily refocused to see rows upon rows of others awakening from their cryosleep, looking as though they faced death firsthand.
A dry chuckle left your mouth, salivating your cracked lips before your gaze focused on a figure wafting in the air near you. Noticing it was one of the on-site nurses, you held back a grimace as you remembered those unsavory events before forcing a smile on your face.
“Hey, I’m guessing you are just checking my vitals?” You said, voice still dry from the lack of moisture.
“I sure am! And you sound like you need some water and food.” The nurse replied back, handing you an assortment of snacks and a water bottle. You greedily gulped down the water till its very last drop and ferociously ate the food in a way that even made the nurse pause checking you to stifle a laugh.
“Slow down, kiddo; the food’s not going anywhere, and we don’t want you choking and dying already.”
You raised an eyebrow at that notion. Clearly, he has never felt hunger measurable to this. After licking the crumbs of the meal of your fingers, you swiftly made your exit amongst the crowd of others roused from cryosleep.
The nerves finally began to hit you as you felt your heart race, knowing you had finally achieved your dream of being on Pandora, a smile gracing you as you left the enclosure.
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The plane ride definitely triggered your motion sickness with its jerky motions and wearing that stuffy Exopack mask required to breathe left you feeling strangely claustrophobic.
Nevertheless, nothing could stop you from feeling awfully giddy to see the land you have studied for ages and envisioned seeing with your own two eyes.
Upon landing, you wistfully closed your eyes and once again imagined how the lands would look and inhaled, visualizing the array of scents present in the forestry of the serene Pandora before you were stirred back to reality by the sounds of men yelling for you to hurry it up.
Huffing in annoyance, you feigned an apologetic smile to the military officials and ebbed your way off the plane.
Wow, this is for sure not the Pandora I imagined… You thought, wincing at the sounds of loud construction and scrunching your nose in disgust at the pollution already formed by humans here.
Thankfully, you knew this was just where the main base was located and where humans inhabited, as most spots of Pandora had not yet been infected by the turmoils of human greed.
You watched a plane land where people dressed in military uniform or camouflage left, most looking intimidating and burly, some even having the audacity to throw their cigarette butts on the ground.
You simply turned your heel around, avoiding the armored vehicles fifty times your size, eyeballing everything like a bad car wreck you can't take your eyes away from.
In turn, your lack of awareness led to you tripping on some random stray piece of metal. You let out a shriek of shock, closing your eyes as you braced for impact, already cursing at your clumsiness.
However, you landed on something relatively cushiony, yet your muscles still ached as some did land on a hard handle. Musing at your stupidity, you heard someone groan underneath you.
Opening your eyes, you made eye contact with your savior, a guy with short, dirty brown hair and eyes that looked bemused but also pained at the position you placed him in.
You soon realized you were staring at him like a creep as he sent you a confused expression. Embarrassed, you plucked yourself from his lap, using the handle from his wheelchair to ground yourself before you apologized, keeping your head down.
“I am so so so sorry; I can’t believe I wasn’t watching where I was going, and sorry for staring at you like that. It must’ve made you uncom-”
“Woah, Woah, don't worry about it; we all are still a little out of it from that plane ride. No hard feelings here, and I can say that you definitely got me feeling more alert now.” He said, giving you a goofy smile under his exopack mask.
“Names Jake Sully, what's yours?” The man, now known as Jake Sully, good-naturedly asked, politely ignoring how you were still out of it, slightly staring at him.
You snap out of it, biting the inside of your cheek as you feel your heart race when you give him your name. You had no idea why your body was reacting this way, but you figured it had to do with the nerves of being on Pandora.
You and Jake both converse idly, following the crowd of people, figuring out that both of you were part of the Avatar program, with you internally smiling in gratification that you had someone you knew there.
When you were completing your arduous years of training, all your buddies ended up dropping out or were deemed unfit for the standards to have a na’vi counterpart.
Exchanging more pleasantries with Jake, you both found yourself on a tour of the building, holding back a yawn at the boring nature of it.
Within it, Jake was momentarily pulled aside to talk about the military strategy used, something that always bore you to death and thought was unnecessary. Frankly, you hoped these humans would gain some sense and realize that colonizing this planet would also cause it to deteriorate like Earth.
As Jake exited, you exchanged glances with this tough white-haired military guy with a gruff expression. His blue eyes narrowed on your form, sending a little salute your way as you held back a gag.
You were hoping he was just being friendly, and he soon escaped your mind as you saw Jake send a smile your way.
Rejoining the tour group was still very tiresome, but at least it didn't have any creepy old man in it.
You suddenly became acutely aware of your surroundings once more when you passed a restricted laboratory, where the guide discretely nodded his head to the two of you as your indicator to pass.
Jake and you both shared a glance, both looking like curious, mischievous dogs as you neared the laboratory.
Taking a few cautionary steps inside, wincing at the sound of your footsteps echoing, your eyes widened as you marveled at the sights that reflected your ecstatic pupils. Even Jake looked at a loss for words when seeing tanks full of na’vi.
They are gorgeous, You thought as you ran your fingertips on the glass exterior, the size of your palm dwarfed by theirs. The Na’vi had silky, azure skin that held a tiger-striped pattern of depth mirroring a dark twilight night.
Light spots kissed their skin, resembling freckles. They were also massive creatures with magnificent long manes and tails. All in all, they were deadly creatures, and although this na’vi had five fingers and five toes on both hands/feet, they looked nearly identical to the natives of the Omaticaya clan.
With your mouth still gaped in wonder, you barely registered a person nearing you before they clamped their fingers on your shoulder, jolting you back to reality.
I really need to get my head out of the clouds, you vowed.
“Hey, just wanted to say these avatars cost trillions, so you might not want to touch the tank while they are developing.” Said a geeky-looking man with brown hair, his eyes looking stern but his voice quivering.
You gulped in nervousness and sent him a shaky smile.
“I’ll keep that in mind.” You say, orbs returning back to the tank, although slight trepidation was present. He reminded you of the expensive price tag associated with the avatars, raising your concern once more.
His look shifted from slight disapproval to endearment as he viewed the tanks with you.
“Amazing, aren’t they? And sorry if I was a little uptight with you. I just don’t want any risks to happen.”
“Ah- don't worry, you prevented me from having my fingerprints over this person's avatar tank.” You said light-heartedly, thoroughly looking at the person. He appeared to be a scientist and spoke in a dorky manner.
Cute, you thought as you sent him a wry smile. He sputtered a weak, unintelligible response as you started humming, looking at the avatars.
“Also, what’s your name? I’m just asking so I can let you see your own avatar if you want to; it’s alright if not, but-”
You cut him off by telling him your name, announcing it in a bemused manner as he spins around, speedily looking for your tank.
“Now that you know my name, I think it’s only fair I know yours too.” You say randomly, causing him to pause in his tracks.
“My name’s Norm Spellman; you can just call me Norm, though,” Norm said, definitely more confidently than before as he was focused on the task at hand, eyebrows furrowed in concentration. You made a mental note to remember him as he seemed trustworthy.
Finding your tank, you noticed Norm spotted Jake, with Norm’s eyes almost bulging out of his sockets and enthusiastically saying how similar Jake looked to Tom.
Although Jake didn’t go into vast detail, he did tell you about Tom and how he came to be on Pandora, but you didn’t press for more as you saw his wounds still went deep.
You sent a measly wave to Jake, who sent a cheeky smile back your way, as Norm quickly pointed to where your tank was before refocusing his attention on Jake, who looked apprehensive at meeting a stranger who knew his brother so well.
Swiveling your head back to the tank, in complete serendipity, you felt an instant, ethereal connection to your na’vi form. It clearly resembled you but had a more feline, angular face with your body more lithe and sturdy than before.
You felt intrinsically connected, this innate drive to transfer your consciousness to the na’vi almost immediately. You could only imagine how Jake would feel, as he seemed mournful over his legs' paralyzation in combat.
With his na’vi form, he could finally experience the joys of movement again, sink his toes into the dirt, and feel himself once more.
While looking, your ears were piqued by the conversation between Jake and this female who seemed to be belittling him. You didn’t mean to eavesdrop, but your hearing was too focused on that to stop it.
“So you just figured you’d come here, to the most hostile environment known to men, with no training of any kind, and see how it went? What was going through your head?”
You knew that berating voice a little too well. Dr. Grace Augustine is one of the head instructors for the Avatar program. Although you two rarely interacted, you heard her voice often as she would reprimand trainees. One even dropped out due to her.
“Maybe I was sick of doctors telling me what I couldn’t do,” Jake replied steely, eyes locked with Dr. Grace as heated looks were exchanged. Norm looked like a fearful bystander trying to cool down the interaction but miserably failing.
We caught each other's eyes, and he sent you a look, pleading for some assistance. You sent a wary smile back, feeling sweat bead down your neck.
While you never had a problem with challenging authority, you worried that stirring up too much trouble may cause you to get kicked out of the program, but you reassured yourself that they spent too much money on you for them to do that.
Stifling your nerves, you faced your worry head-on by introducing yourself to Dr. Grace.
“Nice to meet you! I just want to say I am a huge fan.” You started, voice slightly wobbly before embedding a cheery intonation.
She looked exasperated at you interjecting the conversation, about to go off on you before she took a swig of her cigarette, pondering as her brown orbs wandered to yours.
Amongst this all, Jake sent a grateful nod your way, eyes still filled with an intensity that caused a shiver to rack your body before you locked eyes with Dr. Grace again.
“Listen, I don’t want you dawdling here; tell me you at least did the Avatar program.” She muttered, exhaling cigarette smoke that slightly grazed your nostril.
Your nose unintentionally scrunched in disgust, nostrils flaring as cigarette residue reminded you of pollution back on Earth, and it also smelled really shitty.
She gave a lazy smile to you at your reaction.
“Sorry kid, my addictions’ a pain in the ass; I can't even stop it at Pandora.”
Half-chuckling in response, you tell her your name and avatar experience.
Despite not being completely impressed by your experience, she deems it adequate and walks away in a rush, Norm in tow, muttering about god knows what as Jake releases a sigh he seemed to be holding for a while.
Although you tried your hardest, you were never the best at the training you did, but you could attest that you had the wit and determination to do what was right, something you felt no one else had there.
Jake scooted closer to you, tired eyes looking up at you.
“Thanks back there; I would’ve snapped if she kept probing.” He said with a sigh, rubbing the back of his head in fatigue. Looking closer at Jake, you noticed he had eye bags.
Everything must be hard to understand and adapt to, you thought as you gripped his wheelchair handle in solidarity with his feelings.
“No problem, I did what anyone else would do then.”
He chuckled a little before sneakily smirking.
“C'mon, don't be humble. I know you saw Norm stammering like a baby there.”
At that, you also smirked, chuckling under your breath which didn’t go unnoticed by Jake.
“See! Even you can’t deny that!” Jake said, his laughing causing his sleeve to roll up slightly, revealing more of his prior concealed tattoo. You felt your eyes immediately glued to it, heart thumping, when Jake’s irritatingly smug smile filled his face as he noticed where your attention was fixed.
Raising his sleeve even more, you felt your pupils dilate as you looked back at his cocky smirk; you swiftly turned your head, willing yourself not to look back.
Hearing a conversation outside about going in the pods, you say something haphazardly to Jake and quickly leave, steam simmering from your ear as you hear him chuckle.
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Going into the pod that would transfer your soul from human to na’vi definitely felt like a bad acid trip, with the slight nagging worry that things would go wrong exemplified when you felt a searing pain at first.
Then a bright blue light filled your vision with everything fading as you felt your body feel numb then light.
Waking up was even wilder, as white dots filled your vision with two people hovering over you in oxygen masks, looking more like shadows than humans.
Willing your aching body up, you finally took notice of your size and skin color. Everything was wonderfully blue, almost like that blue girl from Willy Wonka's factory.
“Can you hear me,” said one nurse, who was flashing an irritatingly bright light in your eye. You barely comprehended what they were saying before you let out a shaky yes.
Despite feeling somewhat like an imposter in this body, you were glad your voice stayed the same as it helped reassert that it was actually you.
You were asked to perform some basic motor control tests, wiggling your toes and twisting your arm, the tingly sensation dying down at every movement performed.
After an unbearably long time, you were led to the actual Pandora you dreamed of. Quickly changing into a crop top and cargo shorts, you let your feet sink and be one with the soil.
The dirty was warm, wet, and felt healthy, with life pulsating on it, and the sun brightened your mood even more, if that was possible.
You felt your mouth naturally move upwards, truly smiling for the first time in a while, with your na’vi fangs glinting in the sunlight.
Nothing could damper your mood, not even when a ten-foot na’vi came crashing into you. Falling to the ground, you shut your eyelids in shock before opening them to come in contact with the most stunning pair of amber eyes.
Although a na’vi, this was unmistakably Jake’s, his face only inches from yours, his tail slightly brushing your thigh, his happy grin showcasing his fangs.
The tail continued to move, igniting a trail of goosebumps as you gulped before giving a toothy grin to Jake, who rolled over, giving you space before tilting his jaw to you, looking shy yet assertive.
“Sorry, but this is so amazing. I can’t believe I can walk, run, just live again.”
You returned his sentiment with enthusiasm, though your voice still quivered at the closeness you shared before, your body longing in the loss of his heat.
“No, I understand completely; this is truly enlightening.”
He shot you a grin that made your heart skip a beat before he looked back to the sky, outreaching his hands as if he wanted to touch the constellation.
“Your na’vi form was also a sight to behold, so I couldn’t stop myself from coming here.”
Before you could respond, a voice bellowed.
“Think fast!” A na’vi said, throwing fruit to the both of us, both of us catching it, albeit Jake more gracefully.
Sinking your teeth in it, you let the fluid dribble down your chin as the flavor blossomed in your mouth. Your eyebrows shot up at the unique flavor, eyeing the na’vi who gave it to us.
It was Grace, and you smiled gratefully at her as Jake looked blissfully eating the fruit.
“Make sure to clean up and stay healthy; lots of money is on the line here; get some rest soon too.”
With that, Jake and you messed around a bit more, though you couldn't forget how his light eyes bore through me. We even played a little basketball with Norm before we decided to call it quits.
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The thrill of being a na’vi never subsided, and you found yourself still having nerves in your sleeping area, daydreaming of the exploring to occur tomorrow, pausing your musings when you heard Grace lecture Jake.
“Don’t play with that. You’ll go blind.” Grace started, and you turned your head around to look at Jake close the queue at the end of his braid nervously, cautiously ensuring it was fully closed.
You hold back a laugh at that old wives' tale, deciding that it is finally time to go to sleep. Your breathing evened as you felt yourself drift to dreamland, unaware of a certain avatar looking at your resting figure.