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“Let’s play a game,” Nachi suggests, and Ashigara already feels an overwhelming sense of dread. Then, she remembers they’re in the classroom, and Nachi is capable of keeping things under control in front of the young Destroyers and Light Cruisers. “Since you all didn’t score too well in the reaction segment of the physical examination, I’ve invited my sister over to assist.”
Ashigara swallows down the because Nachi isn’t good enough to teach you, right, haha-- instead, she flashes what she thinks is a bright smile, because she knows perfectly well that Nachi is definitely good enough to teach them. This is just an aspect which requires something Nachi lacks.
The students look at Ashigara’s expression, twitching smile and uneasy eyes. And they immediately shudder in fear.
Already all to used to that reaction, Ashigara yells-- “Oi, what’s that for? I’m not that scary, you know! Sure, I stand taller than all of you, but--”
“No, no, it’s good if they’re scared of you,” Nachi suddenly says. Ashigara shoots a sister an incredulous look, and realizes Nachi has some sort of smirk on her face. “Have you ever heard of this game? ‘What’s the time, Mr. Wolf’?”
Hibiki, amongst the crowd of scared schoolchildren, shoots a glance at her sisters cowering in the corner before raising her hand coolly. “It’s a children’s game, isn’t it? Played in the west. The ‘wolf’ stands on the other side of the room, and the players are supposed to ask them what time it is. When the wolf says the time, we take as many steps as the time-- for 3 o’ clock, we take three steps to the wolf. When the wolf then says ‘dinner time’, we’re supposed to run back to the other side of the room while avoiding being captured by the wolf.”
Whispers begin to spread around the class, killing the silence and replacing it with a collection of noise. Shiratsuyu asks what does she mean, captured? and Harusame gulps with a Hyah, are we going to get eaten?! ...No, I’m not scared, Murasame, don’t laugh--
“Excellent, that saves me the trouble of explaining,” Nachi hums while patting Hibiki on the head. “Now, as you may have probably guessed, I’ve invited my sister to play the part of the wolf.”
Ashigara looks at Nachi. “What, so you just… want me to run after them? I have a meeting with the admiral soon, you know! How long will this take?”
“Oh, I’ve already informed the admiral. The meeting’s been postponed to tomorrow,” Nachi answers. The worst part is, Ashigara can tell her sister isn’t lying. “Besides, this is important. Both fight and flight are important aspects of battle. Speed isn’t of any use if you can only get in quickly and can’t maneuver your way out.”
Nachi does bring up a good point. “So, look at this classroom. The desks and chairs are still in the middle. Ashigara, please stand facing the blackboard. Now-- at sea, there will naturally be obstacles in the way. To simulate this, leave everything where it is. Whenever Ashigara turns around and begins to chase any of you, I want you all to try obstructing her and reaching the other side of the classroom without being caught in any way possible.”
Ashigara chokes. “What?”
“Remember, all’s fair in war. Use the terrain to your advantage. Do not make it your demise,” Nachi continues. “And remember, you all technically run faster than Heavy Cruisers. So if anyone really does get caught by her, I’ll want to see you after class for extra practice lessons at the docks.”
Upon hearing that, most of them freeze up. Of course, Hibiki simply nods, never quite losing that demeanor of hers. And another Destroyer decides to cause trouble too.
Asashimo smirks. “Well, I am the ace! I’ve been in this class the longest, after all. So, you all just need to follow my lead.”
The edges of Nachi’s lips twitch upwards in amusement. “You know, being in this class the longest isn’t a good thing. You should’ve graduated together with your sisters, but, well...:”
Asashimo chokes, while the rest of the class begins to laugh. “H-hey! Shut uuup! I’ll prove it! Kiyoshimo, Kasumi, they’re all the ones who depend on me! Fine, I’ll challenge you!”
Darting to the the other side of the classroom, she points at Ashigara, who can’t see her, since she’s facing the blackboard. “Hungry Wolf! I’ll definitely outmaneuver you!”
“Don’t underestimate me!” Ashigara flicks a piece of chalk from the blackboard, taking aim at the the source of Asashimo’s voice, and somehow manages to nail her in the forehead. “Victory calls my name, you know!”
That’s when the mood finally lightens up considerably, and even Nachi has to take a moment to laugh. “Nachi,” Ashigara breathes while Asashimo tries to brush the chalk off her face, “if they end up breaking my nails, I’m going to kill you.”
“Don’t be like that,” Nachi laughs. “Look, we can go out drinking later. ...Rest of the class, follow Asashimo to that side of the classroom! Now, all of you, say together-- ‘What’s the time, Hungry Wolf?’”
While Ashigara mutters various furious things under her breath, everyone says, in unison, a chorus of childish voices and high-pitched tones--
“What’s the time, Hungry Wolf?”
---
Ashigara doesn’t know how she became a teacher.
Myoukou is an obvious choice, of course. Kind, motherly, responsible, yet also stern enough to become a foreboding figure when needed. She is the nameship of the class, always thinking about others, always nurturing, always approachable to those who have done nothing to incur her wrath-- she is, in all means, the perfect teacher.
Nachi is a rather unconventional pick, but she’s not bad either. She carries herself with the air of warriors long past, using words that have become archaic. “Kisama ga shireikan ka?” She probably knows that kisama has now become a piece of satire, a pronoun used to insult people, though once upon a time it was a word that gave the listener respect beyond what most would deserve. But Nachi doesn’t really care about little things like that. She says what she says, does what she does, and even if she does spend the night drinking too much with Jun’you and racking up the sake bill horrifically, she’s responsible enough to pay for it all herself. She handles children well, always telling them to think practically, taking lessons outside the classroom to make sure they can perform just as well in theory as in practice. In another life, she used to the flagship of the Fifth Fleet, after all. Yes, she’s just very practical, and that’s probably why she’s a good teacher.
Haguro simply works the best when she’s surrounded by little ones. Even if the warship in question is technically older than her, their reincarnations are still young girls who had their powers manifest early in their life, much earlier than the battleships or heavy cruisers. And even though realizing she was born with the spirit of a warship didn’t do much for her self-confidence, Haguro blooms around children. She doesn’t lose her stutter completely, but she smiles from ear to ear, not afraid to stand up straight and take their hands. She teaches with kindness, giving out sweets for right answers and worries for every single student under her care. She is also an excellent choice, because she is not afraid of children, and makes sure they are also not afraid of her.
Ashigara then thinks of herself, and decides the admiral probably dumped her in this position because all her sisters were teachers already.
It wouldn’t be unbelievable. After all, the admiral is a very forgetful person-- leaving the katsu Ashigara makes to grow cold as they focus on paperwork without eating, or even making Haguro cry when they forget to meet her for lunch. Sometimes, they leave Nachi to drink alone when both Chitose and Jun’you are busy, which sounds a lot sadder than drinking with company.
It would make sense that they simply didn’t have time to think of another place for Ashigara but the schoolhouse. They just don’t have time for her, after all.
This wouldn’t feel so bad, if they didn’t always make time for Myoukou.
“Ashigara, reporting for duty! Look forward to a victory report!”
“--Sister,” Myoukou begins, taking second position in the fleet. “Sometimes, I believe you come on too strongly.”
Ashigara blinks, accidentally taking her eyes off the sea for a moment. But she snaps back before she misses anything-- before anything snatches her chance at victory away. “What do you mean, Myoukou? Of course I do! I’m the Hungry Wolf, after all!”
Myoukou smiles at her sister, because no matter how many times she tries to remind Ashigara that the nickname isn’t a compliment, she just won’t have it. “If you say so,” she hums, reaching out to place a hand on Ashigara’s shoulder. The ring she wears presses against Ashigara’s shirt, and it makes her eye twitch. “But you should try to be kinder to your students.”
A pause.
Ashigara doesn’t turn to look at Myoukou. The rest of the fleet is not within speaking distance, currently patrolling the area as they begin to enter suspicious territory. “Is this,” she begins, “about the mission we’re on?”
Myoukou’s smile turns into a grimace.
“No, it’s just in general,” Myoukou says. “--I know Harusame was your pupil. It wasn’t your fault.”
“Never thought it was,” Ashigara answers quickly. She is no stranger to tragedy. Bringing death is her job description, even if it is only to the scourges of the sea. “It was a mission gone wrong. Nothing could be done. They followed every single instruction, but they ran into an enemy which our intelligence has never described before, and Harusame died. It’s a miracle that most of them even escaped.”
Ashigara doesn’t always talk so seriously, voice never reaching a crescendo. And as cold as she sounds, Myoukou knows that Ashigara means well. Her death was no one’s fault. She sunk due to circumstances that could not be avoided. So now, they are on a mission to combat that.
“Enemy detected!”
Haruna yells from their right, and Ashigara immediately make a sharp turn, Myoukou following in perfect synchronicity. “That’s it!” Ashigara points to the figure, floating in the sea with a backdrop of weaponry like black oil and skin so ghastly pale it looks like a ghost-- “That’s the enemy they described, right? What the admiral called ‘Harbour Water Demon’! Top speed! I said top speed!”
“Fusou isn’t that fast,” Myoukou reminds her sister, pointing to the aviation battleship struggling to keep up. But Myoukou then turns and accelerates faster than Ashigara, drawing power from a source that Ashigara will never have. “I’ll scout and see if there’s any backup around her. Reconnaissance seaplanes, liftoff!”
Italia immediately takes the right flank, while Kaga shoots off several Reppuu fighter planes to dominate the air. Ashigara mutters something about hoping the Italian girl won’t flee in the middle of the fight, which causes Myoukou to elbow her and remind Ashigara that Italia has been performing very well in their fleet.
Fusou catches up. Myoukou gets the report. Haruna readies her cannons.
“Only two enemies present! We’ve caught them off-guard-- but, what’s this?” There seems to be nothing alarming about this encounter-- the enemy planes that reacted to the sight of the Reppuu have ended up shot down with ease. Their smoldering forms splash into the water at Ashigara feet, and she already smells the victory. There’s no need to feel worry when Myoukou’s eyes widen at the report. “No, no, you’ve got it wrong. It must simply be another new enemy. ...A Destroyer, then. Yes, thank you. Return.”
Ashigara aims at the hulking battleship, because of course, it’s a huge floating mass of weaponry, who wouldn’t focus on it? “Barrage! Aim! FIRE!”
Everyone fires except Myoukou.
Ashigara notices this only after she’s spent a few rounds attempting to break through the Harbour Water Demon’s defences. In between the howls of Haruna will give it all she's got! and Please follow Italia!, she almost loses herself to the battle completely. “Dammit… it’s just soaking up our shots like no tomorrow! Guess there’s another hungry one on the battlefield-- hey, Myoukou?! Fire!”
She doesn’t think to ask Myoukou about the conversation she had with her reconnaissance seaplane. She doesn’t think much when Myoukou says, “There’s the reports of a Destroyer in the area. Keep distracting the battleship, and make sure to dodge its blows. I wouldn’t want any of us ambushed by this Destroyer.”
“It’s just a Destroyer,” Ashigara says in response. And Myoukou doesn’t say anything in return at all, simply dashing off.
Maybe it would have been better, if Ashigara simply turned her nose up and continued firing. If she was an bull-headed as she always was. But Myoukou is her sister-- and Ashigara isn’t stupid.
“There’s something up,” she hisses. “Kaga, Fusou! Continue attacking from the position I’m in now! If anyone gets hit, call me immediately!”
Just like her sister, she darts off before letting them reply.
The Harbour Water Demon tries to take aim at her, but Kaga faithfully catches it attention before it can blow their flagship out of the water. Ashigara runs across the water, never running quite as quickly as Myoukou but quickly enough to make a round across the battlefield and spot the figure behind the hulking battleship they were facing.
Myoukou’s cannons slowly turn to take aim at it, and Ashigara doesn’t have time to scream, that’s not a Destroyer.
And Ashigara would be wrong-- because it is a Destroyer. But it isn’t an enemy destroyer. It howls like a demon when Myoukou lands a direct hit, but then it chokes, and reaches for the sky, voice turning milder, sounding like a little girl, like a chorus of high-pitched voices--
(“What’s the time, Hungry Wolf?”)
“You weren’t supposed to see that,” Myoukou says, and Ashigara doesn’t even realize she’s taking aim at Myoukou until her sister gently puts a hand on the barrel of her guns. They stand like this, Ashigara’s cannons within point-blank firing range of Myoukou’s face, until Fusou phones in to everyone’s radio and screams that Haruna’s been hit. The Harbour Water Demon seems to go down, at least, but they need to retreat, right now.
“Ashigara,” Myoukou hums calmly, “I’ll take over as flagship. Say you’re injured. I’ll lead everyone back.”
“What the fuck,” Ashigara responds simply. “Did you even see what you shot? Sister, did you even see--”
“Stay calm,” Myoukou says. And then she shoots Ashigara in the knees without hesitation, causing her to fall before Myoukou hits her on the back of her head.
---
“Please understand, Ashigara. You cannot tell anyone.”
The admiral’s office is cold and dark. Myoukou sits on the admiral’s seat, because she’s told the admiral go rest, please-- it is Myoukou’s wish. This is something only she can handle. “Ashigara, don’t look at me with those eyes. I won’t keep my own sister locked up in here. I just want to explain what you’ve seen.”
“Bullshit,” Ashigara hisses, but she doesn’t get leave the room. There are no restraints bounding her other than Myoukou’s words. Her knees are fine, of course-- they are sturdier than humans, and a few minutes in the docks was enough to fix it up completely. “Myoukou, you shot Harusame.”
“I shot a Destroyer Princess,” Myoukou says.
“I’m her teacher. I know how she looks like. Hey, do you know what the Destroyer Squadron reported?! Everything below her hip was blown off, and she sunk. Doesn’t that fit? It was her, Myoukou--”
Myoukou does not move. “Well, firstly, you need to understand she was attacking us.”
“Exactly! That means she must’ve been reprogramed, or something! Couldn’t we bring her back?!”
“Ashigara, do you think we have not tried?”
Perhaps that is all Ashigara needs to hear to understand.
She sags down on her seat while Myoukou explains everything else. From the mysterious origins of the Abyssal Fleet, to the creation of their own fleet. From the spirits of sailors long past comes power beyond scientific knowledge-- a power that lasts for centuries. The Abyssal Fleet sometimes speak, and they speak of memories time has forgotten. They are kind of like youkai, but powerful enough to command respect like kami, and they are neither bad nor good. They simply stake claim on the sea because it is all they know, these memories which keep repeating.
That is why they say, you will not pass. Not again.
And fleet girls are born from the spirit of warships, living embodiments of crews now lost. Whatever power stirred the Abyssal Fleet also brought about their existence, and now they are two forces of nature, just another thing as natural as the waxing and waning of the moon. Battles are like exorcisms, removing the target’s spiritual chains, making them sink without ever getting up like they did the first time. Maybe those spirits are then reborn into fleet girls-- it is something that cannot truly be researched.
But this is what they know. Just like the Abyssal Fleet, if they are destroyed, their grief might become so strong that they join the ranks of the very thing they were born to fight. But because there is nothing else other than spirits of warships that can fight the spirits of warships-- there is no other solution.
It is a simple concept. Ashigara understands. It’s all horrible beyond belief, but she understands.
“The admiral knows.”
“Of course,” Myoukou says. “They have all known for a long time.”
“And Myoukou-- you know.”
Myoukou’s eyes flit down to the ring on her finger, and Ashigara supposes that is explanation enough. “Now you know too, Ashigara.”
“...Maybe we should just tell Nachi,” Ashigara suddenly declares. “Or just tell the people who are sensible enough to take it. Yes, Nachi! Not Haguro, god no-- what about Nagato?!”
Myoukou shakes her head. “We are not to tell anyone else. It is on a need-to-know basis.”
“Well, isn’t this something we all need to know? Hey, if we tell this to everyone, they’ll be much more careful with their lives, right?! We can win--”
“Ashigara, no one needs to know this is a war that we cannot win.”
Ashigara stands up, jaw going loose. She opens her mouth to say something, but it all dies in her throat.
It is impossible to expect no ships will ever sink. Their admiral is astounding, but others are less so. When they sink, they come back as the enemy. They reclaim seas, pushing back the boundaries, but they always win some and lose some. The war has been going on for so, so long, and no one can see the ending in the horizon.
It makes sense now. This is not a war they aim to win. Everyone here is simply here to contain the enemy away from humans who cannot defend themselves. The enemy will never be exterminated, because they are the enemy.
Victory was never an option.
---
“I wonder which is worse,” Ashigara says. “To lose right when you think you’re winning, or to never have a chance in the first place.”
Nachi looks up from her book to blink at Ashigara, before going over and smelling her.
She immediately pushes Nachi away. “In case you’re wondering, you’re not going to smell alcohol off me! I’m not drunk.”
“I thought so. Though,” Nachi begins, “that just makes your somberness all the more mysterious.”
It is at this point which Ashigara lets out a halfhearted groan, because it would be odd if she didn’t. But groaning is the last thing she wants to do, when the only thing that comforts her now is silence, from even her own thoughts.
She thinks of the Abyssal Fleet, and she imagines how it must be like, to be so full of grief and regret that you end up destroying the one thing you have lived to protect. To relive memories of pain over and over rather than have peace in a promised afterlife.
Nachi pats her on the shoulder, and puts a bottle of sake in front of her. Ashigara looks at it, then Nachi, then grabs it and dunks the whole thing down.
“Not all at one go, it’s going to burn your throat,” Nachi says. But she doesn’t move to stop Ashigara. It’s fine if they’re drunk for a while-- they’re warships, they don’t get hangovers. Besides, school has been called off, since no one can concentrate while Harusame’s death is still fresh in their minds.
Ashigara finally chokes when she’s gone through half of the battle, and then she coughs it all over the table. It splatters over the wooden top and her own skirt, both rice wine and spit. Ashigara takes in a deep breath and wonders exactly how pathetic she looks right now.
“To answer your question,” Nachi finally says, “I believe that losing right when you think you’re about to win is the worse option. After all, it’s impossible to never stand a chance. Not even a slight one.”
For a moment, Ashigara wonders what would happen if she just told Nachi. If she just told her that the war they are fighting is futile. That victory does not really call her name.
Instead, she just turns to the bottle, and takes another huge gulp. Nachi does not pry for answers, does not seek an explanation for her sister’s state. She simply opens another bottle.
And for the first time, Ashigara takes up Nachi’s offer of drinking together.
(It will be the last time.)
---
Sometimes, in sorties, Ashigara thinks. About pushing forward. About pushing too far, and sinking. How that would be like. Whether she would be reborn, remembering what has happened.
She doesn’t think about victory. She doesn’t yell her signature phrases. Haguro stops sometimes and asks if she’s alright, in which Ashigara always say she’s fine. Ashigara has always been known to have mood swings, so everyone else simply steers clear on instinct, perhaps not even realizing her change in demeanor.
Now, she understands why her sister says she comes on too strongly. But, in hindsight, Ashigara misses being able to shout all she wants without a care.
---
The entire base begins to whirr to life once the admiral announces a major operation to reclaim part of their seas.
“Now that I think of it, it’s a good they they don’t know,” Ashigara says to Myoukou a little too loudly. Myoukou does not seem worried, though-- because Ashigara always been known to make little sense in the first place, so her conversations aren’t something people eavesdrop on. “If they knew this entire operation was just a ruse to trick everything into thinking we’re making progress, they wouldn’t work even half as hard as they are now.”
Myoukou looks up from the reports she has to finish as the secretary ship, and gives some sort of great sigh. “So, is that an excuse for you to slack off?”
“Just so you know, sister, I’m not slacking off! In fact, I’m working incredibly hard myself! I’ve even fried a hundred katsu for everyone to eat!”
And that’s when Myoukou gives a laugh, the realest laugh she’s had ever since Ashigara uncovered the biggest secret in the world. Once she hears it, Ashigara laughs too, because perhaps mulling in the despair of it all isn’t the life for her. Maybe she can move on, even with this knowledge. After all, Myoukou could.
She packs dozens of lunches for everyone going off sortieing at sea on the first day. She gives one to Nachi and Haguro, before waving them off when dash away, leaving ripples of water in the docks.
Drinking is distracting because it burns, and it takes Ashigara’s mind off everything else. This constant preparation for a seemingly useless operation has lost some of its shine, but it’s distracting enough, and when Asashimo runs up to her asking when lessons will begin again-- so I can move up sooner!-- Ashigara thinks she can probably live like this.
---
The news first comes in whispers, then in shouts, then in the form of Haguro barreling down the hallway with tears in her eyes, and it’s a miracle she can even see where she’s going when she grabs onto Ashigara.
“Nachi is gone,” she chokes, and Ashigara does not say anything until Myoukou draws them both into an embrace.
It happened all too quickly. Myoukou has looked over the reports. Nachi, while fighting, was brought down to heavy damage. But because they were already so deep within enemy territory, and if they retreated now, it would be ages before they had another chance like this. So Nachi offered herself up as bait while everyone else struck down the enemy’s core and reclaimed the area.
The mission was a tactical victory. The admiral is not sure if it was a strategic one.
Ashigara does not cry. She does not ever cry, because any tears she had were used up in her past life. In the battle, Haguro managed to pull through and snatch a victory by landing a devastating critical blow on the enemy flagship, but it is not a victory to her, and Ashigara wonders why she didn’t treasure the exhilaration that comes with fighting for all you believe in. The thirst for victory is gone, and she hates the taste of defeat for different reasons than before.
She tastes defeat because if she had told Nachi what would happen if she died, perhaps her sister would have chosen to live. Perhaps her sister would not have chosen such a death, dying ‘honorably’, only to come back and haunt the living. Yes, Ashigara closes her eyes and thinks of her sister’s corpse opening its eyes and rising up to destroy them. She thinks of mismatched limbs popping back into unnatural shapes. She doesn’t know what kind of ‘grief’ makes an Abyssal ship operate, and whether it would happen to Nachi as well. She doesn’t want to know.
Nachi died thinking she had led others to victory when in actual fact, she has lost. That is the worst outcome of all-- to not even be aware that you have made things worse.
Of course, no one else thinks that. The enemy base is defeated, and they now have a significant increase in access to enemy territory. The scales are tipped to their sides-- Ashigara wonders how long it will take before the scales tip back to the enemy. After all, the fleet girls have lost a marvelous soldier, and the Abyssal fleet has gained one.
Every fleet returns safely, and when the news gets to everyone, they drink. It isn’t even Jun’you or Chitose’s fault. No, they all hear what has happened and simply come to an unanimous decision. They all need this, this burning liquid that is not fuel, this drunken laughter, this celebration for a life well lived and a sacrifice they will never forget. Perhaps in another life, Ashigara would be bawling her eyes out along with Haguro, but she does not. Her grief is different, now, grief mixed with some indescribable feeling of dread, and it is not that she does not cry; she cannot cry.
When she finishes her cup, she simply slumps in a chair and doesn’t move. She sees Asashimo coming closer with a sake bottle, but she doesn’t raise an arm to greet her.
“Yo, teach,” she says, uncapping the lid. “...Sorry. For what happened. Do you want me to pour this for you?”
“Who the hell even gave that bottle to you,” Ashigara groans, imagining her students getting drunk while everyone else isn’t sober enough to stop them.
Asashimo fills up Ashigara’s cup. “Hey, we’re not drinking! I mean, Hibiki is, but she’s Hibiki, and she never ever gets drunk.”
“Go and stop her, then!” Ashigara shoves Asashimo away with the heel of her foot as a reflex action. “--Sorry. I just can’t stop her now, so…”
“Nah, nah, I get it,” Asashimo says. “Hey, teach… no, Hungry Wolf. Any of us might die at any time.”
Ashigara processes the statement, and then wants to yell at Asashimo for saying something so blatantly obvious, but Asashimo continues. “So, if there’s anything you want to say to anyone here, you’d better say it now! Maybe while we’re all too drunk to remember!”
“I knew it, so the Destroyers are drinking too,” Ashigara mutters. But then she looks at Asashimo, who tries to force a wide grin, and she manages to smile back.
When Asashimo leaves, she thinks over her words. She wonders what she has to say.
Then, she lifts up her cup and dunks everything into her mouth at one go.
---
When Ashigara wakes, she smells of alcohol, and everyone else is gone.
Her limbs ache, but at least she wakes in a bed. Though it’s odd, how no one forced her to wake up and take a shower. She gets up, opens the door, and realizes she can see no one around.
She walks, then she runs, then she shouts for everyone she knows. She runs down the hallways, slaps herself to make sure this isn’t a dream, but she can’t find anyone at all. Every single room is empty, every patch of the floor still has wine spilled everywhere, and everything looks hastily vacated. Like something scared everyone off. And Ashigara is struck by some kind of primal fear herself. She calls for Myoukou, Haguro-- Nachi--
Tossing the door of the admiral’s office open, she sees Myoukou facing the wall.
“You’re awake,” Myoukou says before Ashigara can open her mouth. And there is finally something truly angry in her eyes. “Do you see what you’ve done?”
Ashigara stands up straight. “What? I don’t understand, why is everyone gone?”
“Not everyone. Your students, they’re all still here, waiting for you to wake up. Haguro too, bless her soul-- but she won’t even look at me now. Ashigara-- this was a horrible idea. I can’t believe it.”
“What? Myoukou, you’re scaring me, I--” Ashigara stops.
Then she takes a deep breath before saying, “I told them. Didn’t I?”
“Yes,” Myoukou finally rasps. “You told them everything. A big portion resigned on the spot. Many others simply fled. The admiral has been called up to the government to explain what has happened. Everyone knows now, Ashigara.”
Myoukou’s fist is clenched so tightly that Ashigara wonders if her sister’s nails will draw blood from her palms once she unfurls her fingers. The ring is still nested on her hand.
“...I see,” Ashigara breathes, barely able to keep herself calm. Or perhaps she’s calm because she doesn’t yet comprehend what she’s done. For a moment, there's silence, before Ashigara lets out something between a grotesque laugh and a guttural sob. “Then… I suppose the seas have been lost forever.”
“Not yet, not yet!”
Asashimo walks into the room, slamming her fist on the wall to gain the Myoukou sisters’ attention.
Ashigara turns to the Destroyer, who only gives her a curt bow. “Teach-- I’m proud of you. That kind of secret isn’t one you’re ever supposed to keep. It’s better to know.”
Myoukou looks incredulous for a moment. “You’re taking it well… but is it really better? To know this conflict will last for the entirety of our lives, and beyond? To know what we can become?”
Ashigara shakes her head. “Now you know, we can’t win this war…”
“Do you guys even know what victory means?”
Asashimo grabs the both of their hands.
“In my first life, I died in a suicide mission,” Asashimo declares. It takes a while for Ashigara to realize that Asashimo isn’t smiling. “That’s what I call a loss. I did all that I could, but there wasn’t even a difference. It was all, pow pow pow! And nothing else. Everything ended. That’s what futility means, too.”
Then, she drags the both of their hands, pointing them towards the docks that lie beyond the admiral’s window. “But we’re making a difference, right? Sure, it’ll last forever till we can think of some other way to fight the Abyssals… yeah, yeah, that’s sad. But since we’ve been fighting, they haven’t ever encroached onto the mainland. We’ve claimed enough of the sea to protect major shipping lines. Right, I know, now and then they get it back! But when we fight, we get it back too. And even if we’re our own enemy, while we still can, we push them back and protect the people back home.”
Before allowing the two of them to say anything else, Asashimo then pulls their hands together. “Not everyone’s gonna resign, you know. All my sisters are staying. I know you’ll stay too, right, teach? And Myoukou. I’m pretty sure I knew you in our past lives, teach-- you wouldn’t ever give up without a fight. Riiight?”
Silence.
Then Asashimo says-- “So, the two of you need to pull yourselves the fuck together.”
“Who taught you that word?!” Ashigara’s response is almost instantaneous, and that’s when Myoukou finally laughs again. “I mean-- yes… I suppose you’re right.”
“Of course I’m right, I’m the ace,” Asashimo hums smugly. “By the way, you did. Last night, when you were yelling.”
Ashigara mutters something unintelligible while Myoukou tries to stifle her own laughter. It’s funny, not just because of everything that’s happened, but the fact that Myoukou isn’t the one giving the passionate speech right now. Asashimo lets go of their hands. “You know, teach-- and Myoukou-- I think I knew you both in my last life. You wouldn’t give up without a fight, right? It’s not like everyone’s gonna resign! My sisters are all staying. The Kongou sisters are begging the government right now to be nice to the admiral! Kiyoshimo knows allll the battleships, so I’m sure she’ll convince everyone else.”
“That’s true,” Ashigara says, and for once, she is smiling without weight. For once, it does not matter what happens, once they die-- what matters is their actions now, and every life given to protect the seas.
Nachi died for this. Perhaps it wasn’t a complete loss after all. If she comes back, barrels aimed towards the Naval Base-- then Ashigara will fight for humanity in her place.
Myoukou wipes something away from her eyes. Tears? “Of course, things will be harder now.”
“We’ll get used to it,” Asashimo waves off, and then she turns to Ashigara.
“What’s the time, Hungry Wolf?”
Ashigara walks forward, and it is on her own accord. Something builds up inside her, something new and yet incredibly familiar. She straightens her back confidently, flicks her hair back, and feels the shine of the sun.
(“To answer your question,” Nachi finally says, “I believe that losing right when you think you’re about to win is the worse option. After all, it’s impossible to never stand a chance. Not even a slight one.”
Now, Ashigara understands that Nachi was right. The truth is out, and it seems like this is the biggest victory she's earned yet.)
“It's time for a sortie! Battle... VICTORY is calling for me!”