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Dear Binx,
I hope you are faring well after last night's masquerade ball. You were a stunning sight- truly, your skills in craft are unrivaled, and your dancing abilities were both unique and captivating. Your cha-cha slide was not the only glimpse of the material plane that I was lucky enough to have last night, and I must offer my gratitude to you for offering me a bite of your apple. Not in a sexual way I remain at a loss for words, unfortunately, to describe the sheer magnitude of my appreciation for your generosity. For both my exquisitely made outfit and the warm memory, I thank you.
Those words, for now, must suffice, as I have a pressing matter to discuss with you regarding our mutual friends. I speak of Rue and Captain Hob, for you see yesterday Hob saw fit for me to imbibe a mind-reading potion before our rendezvous in the tailor's shop, and as such I was able to skim the surface of both of their thoughts. Forgive me for my bluntness, and for gossiping in a manner most ungentlemanly, but I fear that our friends' happiness may lay in the balance. Rue is in love with Hob. Hob likely returns the sentiments, yet believes his feelings unrequited.
I feel myself compelled strongly to act on their behalf, yet completely lost as to where to begin. I thought, perhaps, I would put the issue to you. Binx, if I may be so bold, I believe you to possess the great practicality, wisdom, and kindness necessary to assess this situation. What, if anything, are we to do to ensure the happiness of our star-crossed friends?
As your knight, I am yours to command however best you see fit.
Please leave your response with my uncanny hound. Grandpa Dog will fetch your letter back to me.
At your service,
Andhera
~~~~~
Dearest Andhera,
If you're fucking with me, I will un-knight you by smacking you in the head with that paper tube. I must admit, I definitely caught a vibe from Rue during the hedge maze, when we first entered one another's trust. But to know it was the beginnings of love? I admit I'm impressed that Hob's tactical plan backfired so elegantly.
We absolutely must do something. Hob and Rue's collective powers of repression are enough to tear a hole into the material plane. As their allies and friends, we are duty bound to ensure their wellbeing, are we not? I have no doubt that those two are exactly what the other needs. I can just imagine Rue's cutting comments to the Goblin court now, reprimanding their treatment of Captain Hob, just as Hob surely will fiercely defend Rue from any mistreatment from their own unscrupulous court.
I wonder if mere proximity will do our work for us, here. Perhaps another intimate gathering of the four of us will enable them to speak their truest hearts?
My knight, here is your first quest: send both Hob and Rue an invitation to your rooms under the pretenses of a classic brunch and scheme session. I believe we would easily be able to make our excuses away from the table and hide ourselves in a convenient closet to then eavesdrop on their ensuing conversation.
I admit this may not be the most foolproof plan. Though I was flattered by your description of me, I am truly blind when it comes to matters of the heart and utterly oblivious to the subtle machinations of the socially adept. Nevertheless, like you I am eager to help our friends realize their shared amorous attentions.
See you later for brunch!
x
Binx