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This. This was it. This was the day. The day Phonegingi was going to burst. He needed to lay these god-forsaken reptilian hellions somewhere, but where? He was broke. No money, not even a penny or a piece of lint, seeing as how he doesn't wear clothes. He didn't have many birthing locations on hand but he sure did know somewhere he was always, no matter the circumstance, welcome! The Funfair! Moist (yet funfair protected) dirt hole or not these babies were being waterbirth-style shot out of this poor creature's swollen cloaca. Who in the godforsaken fuck was going to help him in these trying times? Well, a pathetic, cowardly, stale-smelling wimpish shell of a man(?) of course! How, may you ask? Well, you'll have to wait, you impatient ungrateful dunce! Insults aside, this lizard thing was in need of an urgent egg dislodging. Quickly Gingi scuttled up from his makeshift bed inside his extremely worn down and broken tent and (painstakingly) waddled to the nearest bench.
His first plan was to find an unsuspecting victim. In Gingi's very narrow line of sight, he could see 3 possible midwives. A runtish snot-nosed goblin-looking child-thing, wearing a blue dirt-stained hoodie. Although he’s made children do many other things, making them help him lay eggs completely naked on the bare ground was not something he was prepared to experience, nor did he think this imp would have 2 dollars to spare to get him into the wretched neon seizure-inducing carnival. Pass. Next was a beautiful, silky, feathered angel. Gingi was considering this lucky contender until he noticed that it was most definitely, absolutely, a swan. He wasn’t sure if it was possible for a swan to make money, nor help deliver multiple egg children, but he made sure to note it as a possibility and to try another day. Next. This is when Ging spotted eyes on the most underwhelming manlet almost halfway sunk under the musty pond water. He’s the one! If he doesn’t get so incredibly scared by Phonegingi’s ugly mug that he immediately tosses his wallet at Ging for his own protection, he could at least rob the scrawny sod easily enough.
“AUUURGRGHGHGHHG PHONEGOD WHY ME FBEUBLUHBGHBLUGHBHGH PLEASE” The poor sheboy shrieked. If Ging wasn’t listening close enough, he would’ve thought that another swan was loose. Ging slowly approached the soaking wet man, “May I have some money o’ ye swanne’d one?” He queried. “PLEASE CAN YOU BLUGHGHG;UBLGUGH PLEASE HELP ME BLGHGHGHGBGLUBGGLGHGHGBLGUGB” “Hmm. I don’t know. Can I? Depends on your salary, my good pal.” “I- JUST. GLBHGH I’LL GIVE YOU WHATEVER, MY HOME, MY FIRST BORN, MY WALLET, I’LL PUT YOU ON MY WILL (which doesn’t really mean much), ANYTHING, I’M JUST BLHLLBGHGH I’M DROWNING RIGHT NOW GGBBHHLHGGB A SWAN PUSHED MY FRAIL, WEAK, NOT-SWIM-TRAINED BODY INTO THIS 1 FOOT DEEP POND AND I CAN’T DHGHGJFJGHJ SWIM” He pleaded, gargling thickets of water as he paddled against a non-existent tide. “Ok!” Phonegingi put his slimy leg under the shallow water and pulled out the screeching body. “Gee, I should be a lifeguard! Now give me your money I am heavily pregnant and about to bescumber all over this children’s park.” Ging demanded. “Ok, ok. Fine, just. Just. Give me a second. I saw my meaningless life f-flash before my eyes. I-I need to recover.” He whimpered, gripping onto the green grass with white knuckles, shivering. “Wait. Is your wallet… perhaps. In your pocket?” The scaly monstrosity asked, crossing his arms. “Fuck.” The human (debatable) sighed. He rustled through his jean jacket pockets, but nothing. Next, he checked the barely functional pockets on his tight straight-fit women's jeans (size 8) to no avail. Both Phonegingi and the stranger slowly turned to look towards the pond and there, in all its leathery glory, was the wallet. Sopping wet and at this point, done for. “Phonegod. Out of all people it had to be Randy Jade bestowed with this absolute shit luck. If it wasn’t for that dumb la..” Phonegingi stopped listening to his incessant bickering, he had a goal and he was going to achieve it. “Get up whatever your name is! We’re going job hunting!” “Huh-” And with that, Randy and Phonegingi were on their way!