Archive of Our Own

Chapter Text

Wai wasn't exactly sure when he had fallen in love with Pran.

Perhaps it was the time when he fought off those bullies trying beat up Pran, and the other boy had looked up at Wai with a most grateful expression, as though realising he wasn't alone for the first time since he transferred to the strange new school.

It could have been during the many nights they spent at each other's dorms, reading comics or studying together. Maybe it was the way Pran's eyes lit up when they discussed comic book lore, or the way Pran's voice was gentle and understanding as he guided Wai through some particularly tricky problem in their homework.

Maybe it could have been one of their many adventures in seeking out the best wonton noodle soups in the area. The way Pran's cheeks dimpled as he smiled enthusiastically over a well-done bowl of wonton noodles, or the endearing way he frowned when they failed to live up to his exacting standards; Wai was captivated by all of it.

Wai noticed everything about Pran, how he measured his chopstick to ensure they were the exact length, the puppy-like way he held his toast in his mouth while getting his schoolbag on, the intensity in his eyes when he was studying or playing sports; all these moments etched themselves in Wai's memory every single day he spent with the boy who had taken his heart.

When had Wai fallen in love with Pran? He couldn't pinpoint it exactly.

But when he had realised it? That he could.

Pran was naturally popular and drew the attention and affection from both the female and male populace of the school. Wai had often teased Pran mercilessly because of the gifts the other boy often found in his locker, something that flustered his friendly but shy friend.

That all changed when one girl had finally picked up the courage to confess to Pran directly. It was as though a monster had erupted in Wai's chest, clawing at him from within and urging him to punt the bitch off the school roof. Wai found his hands clenched into trembling fists and his teeth grinding so hard it felt like they might shatter.

When Pran had kindly turned down the girl, Wai was finally able to calm himself down. But it took him awhile to wrestle with the sudden realisation that he had fallen hard for his best friend.

That night, in Pran's room, it was like Wai was seeing Pran in a whole new light. The way his hair fluttered in the fan, how soft his eyes were as he read his book, lips curled into a slight smile at whatever he was enjoying.

Wai found it all breathtaking.

"You okay, Wai?"

"Hm?"

"You've been staring for a bit. Do I have something on my face?"

"No, no, you're perfect..." Wai realised how it sounded and quickly added in a teasing tone. "As always. Not a hair out of place."

He grinned as Pran scoffed. After a moment, he decided to ask Pran what was really on his mind.

"Why did you turn her down?"

"Huh?"

"The girl who confessed today. Why'd you turn her down? She's cute, and she likes you."

Pran look thoughtful for a moment. "She is cute, but I'm not into her that way. Better to turn her down then give her false hope, you know?"

"Not your type, then?"

"Something like that."

"So, what is your type?" Wai was half-hoping to hear Pran say someone like him. Instead Pran chuckled.

"I'm not really looking for a relationship right now, so my type doesn't matter."

Wai found that a little disappointing, but on the plus side, it meant that Pran wasn't receptive to anyone's advances for the moment. Nevertheless, it behooved the best friend in him to tease Pran.

"Really? That's a shame. You probably just broke the entire school's heart."

They both laughed for a bit before Wai decided to press a bit further. "Or maybe...there's someone else? Someone you already like?"

This time, Wai knew he was closer to the mark. Pran's smile froze, and a faraway look came into his eyes. He looked sad and wistful, and suddenly Wai wished he had never asked.

"Don't be ridiculous, Wai," murmured Pran softly, but it was clearly an automatic response. The sudden melancholic aura that radiated from Pran was more than enough for Wai to confirm that his best friend had feelings for someone.

And it wasn’t him.

That was the first time Pran unknowingly broke Wai's heart.

:):)

Wai was furious.

The assholes from Engineering had come to his bar while he was on the clock, and his boss had asked him to take care of their table. That in itself had been bad enough, but they had made his shift a living hell, knowing damn well he wouldn't be able to retaliate if he wanted to keep his job.

And of course, they took a video of it and posted it for the entire university to see.

Wai had been stewing at the bus stop with Safe and Louis when the bastards showed up, looking pleased with themselves.

"Hey look, it’s the bitch!"

"Want to get me a drink? Don't forget the ice!"

"Oops, I dropped my drink. Be a good bitch and pick it up."

"Yeah, you look good on your hands and knees. That's where you belong, bitch!"

Wai, already in a bad mood, snapped.

He couldn't remember it, but the CCTV footage confirmed that Wai had charged over and threw the first punch that led to the fight that demolished the bus stop.

It was humiliating, having to sit there in front of the lecturers, with Pran protesting the fact that the Architecture students alone were being penalised with having to rebuild the bus stop on pain of suspension. When Pran had agreed to help lead the project, Wai had immediately stepped up to help as much as he could.

And Wai really tried. He talked to the Student Officials, searched for sponsorships, got quotes, but there was no question that Pran was doing the heavy lifting. Wai spotted Pran on the cafeteria one day, looking tired. Feeling guilty, he got a coffee, placing it quietly beside him.

"Here," he said softly, pushing the coffee towards Pran. "You look tired."

Pran smiled a little. "Thanks. Any luck getting sponsors?"

Wai sighed. "No. Apparently a chance to put their brand on a university school bus stop isn't attractive enough for them."

"Ah well, we'll find something."

"I'm sorry."

Wai's voice was small and so unlike him that Pran paused, looking surprised.

"I'm sorry I got you into this mess," continued Wai, looking down at the table, unable to meet Pran's eyes. "I should have kept my cool and not let those bastards get to me. Now you're stuck with having to help fix my mess on top of everything else you have..."

"Wai."

Pran reached across the table, placing his hand on top of Wai's. The world seemed to stutter to a stop as Wai's breath caught in his throat and his skin burned at the touch.

"Yeah, I wish you hadn't been so hot-headed. But I don't blame you for getting angry. Those jerks bullied and humiliated you; anyone would have lost their head. I don't blame you for getting mad, but I wish you had come to me first."

Wai slowly looked up at Pran. His best friend's face was kind and filled with understanding. His heartbeat roared like thunder as Wai took in the sight of the oh-so-beautiful man who had taken his heart since they were in boarding school together.

"But you already had a lot on your plate," mumbled Wai. "The Freshy Music Competition, classes, Head Boy of our faculty...I didn't want to burden you."

Pran smiled, and his cheeks dimpled in that way that Wai swore would give him a heart-attack one day.

"It's fine, we're best friends, right? We got each other's backs. We'll figure this out, Wai."

With Pran smiling at him like that, Wai felt he could take on the world.

Even if his heart cracked a little at being referred to as 'best friend'.

:):)

As it turned out, Pran had been right. He had somehow secured funding to rebuild the bus stop from a company that focused on eco-friendly projects. But given that Pran had shifted the reconstruction to an eco-friendly concept, costs had been higher than previously estimated, meaning the company's funding would not cover the whole thing.

As they debated their options, including rebuilding the stop themselves, Wai noted the stressed and worried expression on Pran's face. He knew that look, it meant that Pran couldn't see a way out.

Wai hated to see that look on his best friend’s face. It didn't belong there.

He did have a thought, though it caused him great pain to even consider it. They could enlist the Engineering students' help. It was only right as they had been involved in the destruction of the bus stop too. But the thought of working with the bastards, not to mention their gloating faces if they asked for their help, it sickened Wai.

But seeing Pran at his wit's end? That was worse.

Wai quietly resolved to spare Pran and his friends the shame. He would go to the Engineering faculty and ask for their help himself. He'd beg if he had to. For Pran, he'd do anything.

So when Pat had shown up with the rest of the Engineering goons the next day, Wai was taken aback. He was even more taken aback when they offered their help to rebuild the bus stop. While he was inwardly relieved that he and Pran had been spared the humiliation of begging for their help, the smug, superior look on their faces was grating, as though they were bestowing a huge favour. As if they weren't also the ones who had demolished the stop.

But what grated Wai's patience above all, was the look Pat gave Pran. There was something there, some ulterior motive that he couldn't name, but he didn't like it. So, he glared hard at Pat, missing the hint of a smile curling at the corner of Pran's mouth as he stared at Pat.

):):

Pran was beautiful.

Playing the guitar, his angelic voice driving the audience into rapture, Wai had no doubt that Pran had just won them the competition. As for Wai himself, he knew that his feelings for Pran had deepened. He was hopelessly in love with his best friend.

His heart nearly stopped when Pran threw himself into Wai's arms when they were announced as winners. As they hugged, celebrating their victory, Wai saw the Engineers looking pissed off, especially Pat, who looked furious. It made Wai even happier.

He could have been more mature about it, but Wai couldn't resist gloating to Pat and his goons when they showed up at the bar. Korn had looked ready to fight, but Pat had stopped them, muttering something about not being in the mood.

Watching them slink out had been awesome, so Wai and his friends had more gusto in celebrating their triumph.

He honestly couldn't remember seeing Pran so happy and carefree. His best friend's face was flushed, laughing freely and his eyes sparkling, making Wai fall for him all over again. With the high from winning the competition, Wai finally found his courage. He decided it was time for him to confess his feelings for Pran.

So, when Pran staggered, having drunk a little too much, Wai immediately volunteered to take him home, knowing that this was his chance. He spent the entire ride thinking of what to say, trying not to get distracted by Pran's arms on his shoulders.

Trying not to imagine what it would be like to have them around his waist.

When they arrived, Pran stumbled a little as he dismounted the bike.

"I never thought I'd get to see the Pran Parakul like this," teased Wai as he dismounted to steady him. Pran chuckled at that, and Wai was thinking that he'd help his best friend up to his room, get him some water to help sober up...and then confess his feelings.

Whether Pran accepted or rejected him...Wai would deal with that when he came to it.

But all thought of confessing flew out the window when he saw Pat waiting at the dorm entrance. The other man's face was fiercer than usual, glaring daggers at them. Wai's hackles immediately rose, and he glared back.

"Come here."

The way Pat said it to Pran, there was something in his voice that was so authoritative, so possessive that it made fire erupt in Wai's stomach. How dare that son of a bitch talk to Pran as though Pran was his?

Wai immediately made to step in front of Pran, to shield him from Pat, but was stopped.

"It's okay," assured Pran. "I'll deal with him."

Wai knew Pran was more than capable of defending himself, but at that moment, he didn't want his best friend anywhere near Pat. Nevertheless, he gave in, allowing Pran to confront the other man.

The exchange that followed was confusing, to say the least.

Wai watched as Pat became increasingly unhinged, and Pran seemed to grow more...worried. He watched as Pran seized the front of Pat's shirt, whispering something.

"Why?" Pat's voice was loud, sounding angry but also spiteful. He looked over Pran's shoulder to glare at Wai. "Are you that scared of him finding out?!"

Wai was already walking forward but Pran quickly whirled around to stop him.

"Stay out of this!" Pat snarled as he gestured between Pran and himself. "This is between me and him!"

Pran whirled around to grab the front of Pat's shirt again, pulling him close to whisper something. Whatever it was seemed to piss Pat off further.

"Maybe we should just tell him!" Pat snarled, looking over at Wai again.

"Pat!" Pran sounded like he was on the verge of panicking, sounding frightened.

That made Wai move.

"Stop screwing with my friend!" Wai pushed Pran aside and punched Pat hard, sending the other man crashing to the ground. Pat immediately got up, eyes blazing but Pran was already there...stopping Pat?

Wai was a little confused by that, but he stepped forward to protect Pran, only for his best friend to turn and push him back.

"You stop it!" Pran sounded almost angry. "Just go home!"

He looked into Pran's eyes, seeing the upset and anger in them. He looked over at Pat, seeing the same emotions in the Engineering student's eyes. But what struck Wai most was that Pran was standing between him and Pat. Like he was shielding Pat from Wai.

Protecting him.

It made Wai's anger bubble over.

"What the hell's going on with the both of you?" Wai asked angrily. He saw how Pran pulled the mask of calm back onto his own face, hiding his true feelings.

Hiding from Wai.

"Nothing." Pran's voice was emotionless, deathly quiet.

Wai's eyes travelled between Pran and Pat, one now expressionless, the other seething with anger.

"You're sure it's nothing?" Wai asked quietly, his tone still angry, but there was a hidden plea in it. A plea for Pran not to hide the truth from him.

"Like I said," replied Pran. "It's nothing. Go home, Wai."

Wai stared at him for a long moment before wordlessly mounting his bike and riding off. He had no idea what had just happened, but he understood one thing.

Pran had lied to him.

He had looked Wai in the eye and lied to him.

Wai's heart broke at the thought.

:):)

“Yeah, she dumped my sorry ass,” whined Pran. “So, you guys have to keep me company and drink with me, okay?”

Louis and the other Architecture students might have bought that story of Pran being in a secret relationship with some girl, but not Wai. Not just because Wai was sure Pran would have told him at least, but because Wai knew for a fact that Pran was gay.

Not that Pran had actually told him that himself.

It was actually a pretty funny story. Auntie Dissaya had called Wai one day and invited him to join some event. After Wai had accepted, she had whispered conspiratorially and asked if Pran had finally asked Wai out. Wai had laughed it off, thinking nothing of it when she had asked if Pran was seeing any other guys.

Guys. Not girls.

Wai had been a little flabbergasted by that. Auntie Dissaya had then realised she had accidentally outed Pran to Wai. He had assured her that he was fine with Pran’s sexuality (happy about it, actually), and that he wouldn’t bring it up unless Pran told him. The truth was, Wai had always suspected it, but had never pressed the issue, willing to wait for Pran to tell him himself.

“I just assumed Pran had already told you, Wai,” Auntie Dissaya had said remorsefully. “You guys are so close.”

And now here was Pran, clearly lying to them just before Wai and the rest could launch their plans to beat the shit out of Pat. Wai had no idea why the Engineering student had come, but he was clearly targeting Pran and Wai didn’t like that one bit. But for whatever reason, Pran seemed intent on stopping them, so Wai played along.

Though a possible reason for Pran protecting Pat threatened to rise in Wai’s mind, he forced it away. He didn’t want to accept it. There’s no way that there was something going on between Pran and Pat.

Something that Wai wished he had with Pran.

:):)

Wai was confused.

Something had changed with Pran. Nothing that would be odd to the people around them. But to Wai, there was a new nuance in their interaction that only he was aware of.

It almost seemed like Pran was...flirting with him?

Given their long friendship, they had always been open with their affections. Mock kissing, hugs, arms thrown around each other's shoulders, a playful pat on the butt or sitting in each other's laps, these were all nothing new to them. But there was subtle difference in the way Pran dished them out now. So subtle that even Wai wondered if it was just a conjuration of his lovesick mind.

Every time Pran touched him, he lingered just a little longer than necessary. His hand placement might be off. For example, after congratulating Wai for getting his sports scholarship and preventing him from getting into a fight with Pat for kicking the ball at them, Pran had led him off the field. But instead of placing his arm around Wai's shoulders as was his usual custom, Pran instead placed his hand on the small of his back.

It was a decidedly more intimate area, and Wai had been unable to suppress the small gasp of surprise the touch elicited.

Then there were other things, Pran gently leaning a little too close when Wai asked for help in their assignments, or gently brushing their hands together when they talked, or even the extra sweet smile he gave whenever Wai helped him out.

It almost seemed like Pran was flirting, but given it was mostly masked in their everyday interaction, Wai couldn't be certain, and it was driving him crazy.

Because it was starting to cause small flickers of hope that he had mostly kept suppressed since that night after the Freshy Music Competition. That maybe Pran finally had feelings for Wai. That he had gotten over whatever was going on between him and Pat.

But Wai didn't quite dare to get his hopes that high.

:):)

Wai was on his way back to the Architecture play audition, thinking about the cute girl he had bumped into earlier. He hoped he might find her there so he could ask for her number. Wai still had feelings for Pran, but perhaps it was better that he tried to move on...

"Hey Wai! Nice timing!"

All thoughts of trying to move on went out the window when Wai caught sight of Pran, standing on the steps leading up to the audition hall. His best friend had a radiant smile as he waved at him, and Wai swore his heart would give out.

Pran bounded the steps towards him. "Have you eaten? Let's get dinner."

"Uh, actually..." Wai mumbled, still thinking about the cute girl from earlier, but his thoughts were becoming incoherent as Pran leaned close to him, allowing Wai to get a whiff of that scent that was so...Pran.

"Come on, my treat," said Pran, slinging an arm over Wai's shoulders and flashing him that dimpled smile that always did funny things to his heart.

As if Wai could ever say no to that.

So, he went along, Pran chattering about the play as he walked alongside. There was nothing out of the ordinary as they made their way to the noodle truck, just them joking around, talking about studies and the play. It was all normal.

Until it wasn't.

First Pran ordered food for both of them. That he remembered exactly what Wai liked wasn't unusual, having seen Wai order it a hundred times.

"Oh, you remember just how I like it?" teased Wai.

"Of course..." said Pran, and there was something extra in the way he said that, in the way he smiled that made Wai falter as his heart fluttered. Luckily, their food quickly arrived so Wai could hide how flustered he was by digging into his meal.

But it didn't end there. Pran asked for Wai's help to open a bottle of water for him, and in response to his confusion, Pran had pitched his voice low and even batted his eyes at him as he repeated his request.

There was no way Wai could say no to that.

Or even the part where Pran playfully stole his meatball and apologetically fed Wai one of his own. It was almost like they were boyfriends.

While Wai tried to wrestle down the surging hope in his heart, Pran suddenly reached over to him.

"You've got a little something here..." he murmured.

"What?" Wai asked stupidly. But before he could react, Pran was wiping the corner of his mouth with his thumb.

No, not wiping.

Caressing.

He was gently caressing Wai's lips, cheeks and chin, the motion gentle, almost sensual. It sent jolts of electricity down Wai's spine, and he barely managed to stop himself from shivering at the touch.

This was different, this was almost seductive.

The realisation that Pran was actually hitting on him made Wai's heart sing. And for one glorious second, Wai was going to confess to him, already imagining a tomorrow where he could finally declare to everyone that Pran was his-

And then it happened.

Wai saw the way Pran's eyes briefly shifted to the side. It lasted for just a split second, but it was enough to make Wai realise it wasn't for him. None of it had been for him.

Wai was absolutely crushed. He was certain if he looked in the same direction, he would see that fucking Engineering student that he had come to hate more than anyone else. So, he didn't. Pran may have denied him his deepest desire, but Wai could spare himself further torment by denying himself the truth for a little longer.

Pran was smirking as he glanced over to the side, as Wai bowed his head over his bowl of noodles, fighting back the tears in his eyes.

Perhaps Pran realised that something was wrong, because instead of just parting ways after their meal, he chose to walk Wai back to his dorm.

"Are you okay?" he asked, concerned.

"Why wouldn't I be?" Wai asked, his voice barely above a whisper.

Pran frowned. "You didn't finish your food, and you got all quiet."

Wai's eyes felt hot, and he rubbed them furiously, hoping to pass it off as sleepiness. "It's nothing, Pran. I'm just tired."

"You're sure?"

Anger surged through Wai, and for a brief second, he wanted to punch Pran. Or kiss him. Right then, he was just so torn between his anger and feelings for Pran that Wai was a complete mess.

"I'm fine," he replied, hoping Pran didn't notice the little hitch in his voice. The frown on his best friend's face told him otherwise. "You better get home, it's getting late."

"Wai, you sure-?"

"Good night, Pran," said Wai, taking a deep breath to calm himself. "Thanks for walking me back. Get home safe."

Before Pran could press the matter, Wai all but fled into his dorm.

Once the door to his room slammed shut, Wai broke. He leaned against the door and slowly slid to the floor, tears streaming down his face, biting on his knuckles to stop himself from sobbing out loud in case Pran decided to come up and check on him.

It hurt. His heart hurt so much at Pran's cruelty. Wai couldn't believe that Pran would use him like that. Yes, he had no idea about Wai's feelings, but Pran didn't seem the type to toy with people.

Yet he had. Unknowingly or not, it made no difference to Wai. He had made Wai feel that he had a chance, only to crush it in whatever fucked up game he was playing with Pat.

Wai leaned his head back against the door, letting the tears stream down his face.

Pran had unknowingly broken his heart many times in the past. But this was the cruelest yet.

):):

One good thing about the upcoming play was that it gave Wai ample excuse to avoid Pran by claiming he was too busy or tired. Whenever Pran remembered to invite him for hangouts, that was. Pran was so wrapped up in...the other guy, that he was spending far less time with Wai. It seemed that most times he didn't even notice Wai's absence. It was one thing to know that his feelings for Pran were one-sided, but now it also felt that Wai was losing him as a best friend.

They had always been Pran and Wai.

Now it was just Wai.

All alone.

Safe and Louis were his friends too, but they had their own connection, something that Wai wasn't a part of. Sometimes he felt lonelier when he was with them while they were lost in their own world. He didn't really feel it back then because he had Pran.

Once, Wai had missed Pran enough that he decided to pay him a visit despite still being upset at being used. But when he got there, he saw Pran getting into a familiar red Toyota.

Yeah, Pran wasn't even missing him.

It hurt.

So, Wai spent most of his time alone, missing but also resenting Pran. He felt cast aside and unneeded.

Unwanted.

So it was, on that fateful day, when Wai walked into the sound room, all the negativity he had been wallowing in had become a thundercloud, ready to break at any moment. He shook his head to clear his thoughts, wanting to focus on the task ahead.

"Where's Pran?" he asked the other guy in the sound room.

"I think he's down at the stage," the guy replied.

Wai nodded. Maybe that was a good thing: he was feeling ready to lash out at the slightest provocation. He could use this time to cool off-

"Hey, listen to this."

The headphones were shoved into his face. Frowning irritably, Wai raised it to his ear.

"-if I can't deal with this little thing, how can I be your boyfriend?"

The voice was obviously Pran's. Wai's heart clenched; who was he calling his boyfriend?

"What was that? What did you call me?"

The familiar voice sent rage surging through Wai like never before. He knew it as well as Pran's, only this voice had been a source of aggravation for him.

"Nope. You lost your chance." Pran's voice was playful. He had never sounded that way with Wai in all the years they've known each other, and that knowledge hurt even more, and stoked his rage to new heights.

Before he knew what he was doing, Wai had raised the volume so that the whole theatre hall could hear Pran and Pat's playful, flirty banter. He could see the people in the audience seats looking around in confusion.

In his mind's eye, Wai also saw the way Pran had flirted and touched him intimately before. How it had all given him false hope. How Pran had looked aside with that sickening, self-satisfied smirk, never realising that he had broken Wai's heart in the cruelest way possible.

How he had cast Wai aside for his Engineering boyfriend-

That knowledge, confirmed by Pran's own words, spurred Wai on. He watched as his hand moved seemingly of its own volition, almost fascinated as though he was observing from outside his own body...as though he wasn't the one doing it.

And the curtain dropped.

):):)

"Wai, wait."

The heartbreak in Pran's voice stopped Wai from running away. He turned to glare at his best friend. Pran looked almost as miserable as Wai felt, and the sight made his heart ache. It perfectly captured the crack in their relationship.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you," said Pran. "But I didn't have much of a choice because of how much you hate him..."

Pran trailed off, looking so forlorn. It made Wai want to hug him. Wai would have hugged him, if it weren't for the pain in his own heart.

Wai understood that what he had done was many times worse than what Pran had done to him. It was simple: Pran didn't know how Wai truly felt about him and had unknowingly toyed with and hurt Wai's feelings. In contrast, Wai had betrayed Pran by exposing his relationship with Pat to the whole uni. For outsiders looking in, Wai was the bad guy. Simple as that.

Even Wai felt that way once his rage had cooled off the moment he saw the shock and betrayal in Pran's eyes when the curtain had fallen.

"Wai! How could you do that?!" Safe demanded the moment he and Louis caught up with him.

"He lied to us!" snarled Wai so ferociously that both Safe and Louis took a step back.

"Yes, but-"

"He's been fooling around with Pat behind our backs this whole time," continued Wai furiously. "All those times he had to cancel on us, make excuses...it was all because he was hiding whatever this shit is with Pat!"

Louis nodded. "I get it. I'm pretty angry too-"

"But you just outed Pran to the whole university!" snapped Safe. "Yeah, it hurts that he hid it from us. But we all know why! And you just went and-"

"Shut up, Safe," growled Wai, understanding the magnitude of what he had done. But feeling angry was better than feeling ashamed.

"Don't talk to him like that!" snapped Louis, taking a step towards Wai but Safe stopped him.

"Don't you both start on each other!" Safe looked absolutely frustrated. "This whole thing is fucked up enough without you two fighting..."

"If you're just here to state the obvious, I'm leaving."

"Wai!"

Safe and Louis had not talked to Wai since then, which left him even more embittered by the whole situation. Now Pran was standing before him, looking heartbroken with sorrow.

"I have to forgive you, right?" said Wai bitterly, as if it was Pran who had knowingly been in the wrong. "If not I'm the asshole?" And he was. Wai knew that. Pran may have hurt him deeply, but he hadn't known. Wai knew all too well that if Pran had known the depth of his feelings, he would have never used Wai that way. He would have never done anything to give Wai false hope.

He might not have even been friends with Wai.

As it was now, they may not even be friends anymore.

"What else could I have done?" Pran was saying in frustration. "You're...so into this stupid rivalry between our faculties that you would have been against me and Pat being together! I didn't have a choice!"

The fact that Pran thought that Wai could have done something so devastating over something so petty hurt even more. It was a reminder of the gulf that had opened between them, like they both no longer knew each other.

Because of the secrets Pran had kept from Wai.

Because of the secrets Wai had kept from Pran.

"I knew I would have told you," Wai lied through his teeth. "Because you're my best friend." His voice broke a little, and he desperately hoped Pran didn't hear it.

Maybe Pran had, because he took a step forward, and looked like he was going to touch Wai in the way that always comforted him.

Wai took a step back and told the only truth he could.

"It freaking hurts."

And he walked away.

):):)

"Hey, asshole."

The sound of that voice immediately raised Wai's hackles as he turned to face the ponytailed asshole from Engineering. Korn looked extremely angry as he glared daggers at Wai.

"I want a word with you," said Korn.

"Too bad, because I have nothing to say to you," snapped Wai, turning to walk away.

"Don't you fucking walk away from me!" snarled Korn, grabbing Wai's arm. It said a lot about Wai's state of mind that he didn't immediately whirl around to punch Korn. Instead, he slowly turned, his expression cold.

"Get your fucking hand off me," he warned. Korn did but stepped closer so that he was face to face with Wai.

"What you did was shit," Korn said bluntly.

Great, him too?

"Yeah, so I've been told," said Wai bitterly. "What's it to you?"

Korn's ridiculously thick eyebrows furrowed. "In case you forgot, it was my best friend you also outed, jackass."

As if Wai gave a damn about Pat right now.

"Yeah? Well now you know he was lying to you too," he sneered, and Korn looked like he was about to start throwing punches, so Wai braced himself, ready to throw them right back-

"It doesn't matter."

Wai blinked.

"It was Pat's...and Pran's secret to tell. It was theirs, not anyone else's. They probably had reasons to keep it secret...I mean apart from the whole Engineering vs Architecture thing. Did you even consider that?"

Wai hadn't.

"You took that away from them and forced them into this whole mess. Don't you see that?"

Wai did, but he had been so hurt that he just couldn't...

Korn took a step closer. "I've always hated your guts. But one thing I did respect about you was that you'd always stand up for your friends. But what you did...was really low. You broke your best friend's trust by revealing their relationship before they were ready. And you wonder why Pran decided not to tell you in the first place? Seems to me like he was being smart-"

"Please stop."

Wai had meant to punch him. He wanted to shut Korn up by breaking his jaw. Instead, the ruthless truths that Korn had hurled at him had hurt far more than any blow the other man had inflicted on him in the past. To be reminded of the depth of his betrayal by Korn of all people had just torn Wai apart from the inside.

The look on Korn's face was one of total shock. At first, Wai wondered why. Then he blinked and realised a tear had rolled down his cheek. Horrified, Wai pushed Korn away, turning his face aside to wipe it.

"A-are you crying?" Korn's voice was just as shocked. "W-why-?"

"Don't," Wai's voice cracked. "Just don't." It was horrible, caught being vulnerable in front of his adversary. Clearly Korn hadn't been expecting it at all, and now looked completely lost as he stared at Wai in stunned silence.

"I...I just can't deal with you right now," muttered Wai as he stormed off, leaving Korn behind.

):):)

The worst thing about the whole ordeal was that Wai was still forced to be around Pran because of their schedule. It was hard trying to function normally with Pran giving him a hurt glance every now and then. Safe and Louis were still angry with Wai, but instead of siding with Pran, they had decided to sit the fence and wait for things to cool off.

Wai wasn't surprised, they've always hedged whenever they could.

But to make matters worse, Pran kept trying to reach out to him. He kept trying to extend an olive branch to Wai. Trying to save their friendship.

Pran was displaying all the reasons that Wai had fallen for him in the first place.

It made Wai truly regret what he had done. By betraying Pran, Wai knew that he was unworthy of not only Pran's love, but now he also felt unworthy of Pran's friendship.

So, he kept his distance.

It wasn't hard, because it hurt so much to see Pran's crestfallen expression whenever Wai rebuffed his attempt to reach out. But not as much as it hurt to see Pran and Pat together.

Pat had proven to be a good boyfriend.

With their relationship out, Pat had boldly stood his ground at Pran's side against all the opposition. He had been a pillar of support for Pran, relentless in his attempts to cheer up his boyfriend's melancholy at recent events.

That Pat's friends had stood by him was literally rubbing salt in the wound. Wai had proven that he was a shit friend, even though he had been mad with jealousy at the time. But the fact that Safe and Louis were keeping their distance from Pran simply because of the cold war between him and Wai was baffling.

It was grating to see that the Engineering gang were much stouter in their friendship. As time passed, they had even abandoned all pretense at hostility towards Pran and Pat's relationship and had even accepted Pran into their midst, openly teasing him and Pat when they were being lovey dovey with each other.

Which was often, as much as Wai tried not to look.

Of course, this all translated to complete hell for Wai. He was getting harassed by other students who were supportive of Pat and Pran. Some of them came to the bar where Wai worked and deliberately made things difficult for him. He was often 'accidentally' bumped into in corridors, received anonymous hate mail and once, someone put up posters with the word 'traitor' splashed across his face.

His own teammates on the rugby team were gunning for him. Wai was being tackled harder than anyone else, and at one point, he thought all his ribs had been broken after a particularly savage take down by Chang. Wai had hardly been able to breathe as he laid on the ground while the his teammates high-fived each other, except for Pat and Korn.

And as trying as it all was, none of it could compare to the pain of seeing Pat and Pran together. To see the soft smile on Pran's face whenever Pat was with him, to hear the way he laughed at Pat's jokes, or even the hidden happiness in his voice as he scolded Pat's friends for teasing them.

Wai felt so worthless at the realisation that Pran didn't need him at all.

):):)

"Hey, asshole. Dropped any curtains lately?"

Wai ignored Chang's voice, focusing on untying his rugby boots.

"You know, I think Safe and Louis are in a secret relationship," chimed in Mo. "Don't you want to out them too?"

Wai continued to ignore them, though his hands trembled a little. It was nothing new. He had been receiving this kind of treatment from most of his rugby teammates.

"You know, Mo? If we get together, we can always let this guy know," said Chang mockingly. "He'll save us the trouble of coming out."

"Oh, that's a good one, Chang. We-"

"Guys, that's enough. Knock it off."

Then there was also this. Korn had been getting the rugby guys to ease up on their ragging of Wai. It was...confusing to say the least. Wai would have thought that Korn would be leading the charge in putting him down.

"But-"

"Go on. Go get changed. We'll go for drinks after."

Wai listened as Chang and Mo headed for the changing rooms. In the corner of his eye, he could see Pat freely flirting with Pran. His heart clenched at the sound of his best friend's laughter.

"You could just apologise."

Sighing, Wai bowed his head as Korn sat down beside him.

"I mean, it's got to be better than you just wallowing here by yourself-"

"Shut up."

But of course, Korn wouldn't. "He's your best friend. You miss him, don't you?"

"Shut up."

"Yeah, you fucked up. But are you just going to hide from him? You don't think he's a big enough man to forgive you? You just have to make it right-"

"Why are you doing this? Why do you care?"

Korn stared at him steadily. "Because of what happened...when we last talked." He said slowly, and Wai tensed. "You feel bad, don't you? You knew what you did was wrong. Now you just don't know how to make it right." Korn touched him on the shoulder and Wai flinched. It was the first touch he had received from Korn that wasn't a blow of some kind. "Just...tell him the truth. Be the bigger man."

But that was the problem. Korn didn't know what the truth was, and why Wai could never tell Pran.

"Why do you even care if I make up with Pran?" Wai asked wearily. "What's it to you?"

Korn didn't answer, and Wai shrugged off his hand and stood.

"Just leave me alone, Korn."

):):)

Damn Pat.

Damn him a thousand times over.

He just had to be the bigger man and take a backseat to maintain harmony on the team. And now they were losing. Wai was doing everything he could to get the win, but as much as it wounded his pride to admit it, he just wasn't as good at Pat, plus his teammates did not like him.

It was almost a blessing when Chang went down, leaving the coach no choice but send Pat back in. Behind Pat's play, they were able to stage a comeback and were one touch away from taking the lead. As it was, Wai found himself with the ball for the final game-deciding play. Their opponents were converging on him, leaving Pat open.

It was simple, all he had to do was pass the ball to Pat and the game was theirs.

Yet for the briefest of moments, Wai hesitated. All he could recall were the times that Pat had done him wrong.

Cornering him and forcing him to call his friends to fight. Ganging up to humiliate him at work, where he couldn't defend himself without getting fired. All the fights and all the scrapes.

Drawing Pran away from him.

Wai didn't want to give Pat the ball and the glory.

But then, unbidden, he remembered what Korn said.

Be the bigger man.

Wai passed Pat the ball.

):):)

As everyone celebrated, Pat came to Wai, offering his hand.

Wai could feel Pran and Korn watching. This was his chance to show he could be the bigger person, to restore some measure of friendship with Pran. All he had to do was take Pat's hand.

Pat, who was Pran's boyfriend. The one who got to hold Pran's hand, got to kiss him. Got to do all the things that boyfriends do with Pran. The one who loved Pran.

The one who Pran loved back.

Jealousy burned in Wai's heart, and he walked away from Pat. He could feel Pran's eyes on him along with Korn's. He could feel their disappointment. The feeling sucked.

But why did disappointing Korn bother Wai too?

):):)

Wai was really in trouble now.

Scratch that, he was in danger.

The thug he had pissed off post-match had shown up at the bar where Wai worked. He had decided to escalate their early confrontation by going after Wai. Still feeling pissy, Wai had stood his ground and jawed at him.

Until the guy pulled a gun on him.

All the anger surging in Wai had immediately vanished, leaving only fear behind. Suddenly all he could think of was his mother, living alone in Chiang Mai, not knowing that Wai was on the wrong end of a gun. All he could think of was how he was going to die without ever making up with Pran because of his jealousy and pride...

"Hey...take it easy," pleaded Wai.

The guy looked angry and a little drunk, which was a bad combination. Wai thought of grabbing the gun and twisting it away, but he was too scared-

The door behind them opened, and the guy immediately lowered the gun to hide it, giving Wai the opportunity to flee.

He tried to tell his boss but was frightened into silence when he spotted the bastard watching him. Terror surged through him when his boss told him to serve the thug's table, but he had no excuse.

And they proceeded to humiliate him.

They did everything that Pat and his friends did, but this time, despite the similar helpless rage burning through him, Wai was kept meek by his terror. When he kneeled down to wipe the beer they had purposely spilled on the floor, one of them poured beer on his head.

Wai trembled with rage and humiliation but didn't dare to do anything. They were laughing at him, and he closed his eyes and grit his teeth to tough it out-

"Quit it, assholes."

No way.

No fucking way.

There was no fucking way that Pat and his gang were there, defending him. Yet there he was, Pran's boyfriend, standing up to the guy. Pat's friends didn't look too keen about getting into fight on Wai's behalf.

Except for Korn. The ponytailed idiot looked like he was raring to go, and that made Wai wonder why. But at the moment, all he could think at that moment was that Pat didn't know that asshole had a gun and was very much in danger.

And even though Wai was still incredibly jealous and resentful of Pat for taking Pran away from him, he didn't want anything bad to happen to his best friend's boyfriend.

"Pat, stop it," Wai urged, trying to separate them. It took some time, but eventually both sides backed down. The bastard with the gun had even seemed to forget about Wai. But he didn't like the way the punk was staring at Pat.

):):)

Wai wanted to warn Pat to stay away from him, but got called by his boss, P'Rai. The older man wanted to know what the fuss was about. Without the gun-totting's assholes eyes on him, Wai quickly took the opportunity to inform his boss about it. As P'Rai went to call the police, Wai headed back to the front of house, looking for Pat and his friends.

Who had gone.

Shit.

"Art, did you see where those guys went?" he asked his co-worker urgently, pointing towards the table.

"They left a few minutes ago."

Wai quickly glanced over to where the thug with the gun was sitting. His heart turned to ice when he saw the tables there were also empty.

Shit. Shit.

Outside, a gun went off.

Within seconds, Wai was sprinting out of the bar, running in the general direction of the noise. What he saw made his blood freeze.

Korn was cradling Pat, shouting in panic as Mo and Chang looked freaked out.

"Pat! Pat! Talk to me-" He cut himself off when he saw Wai. "He got shot! Wai, he got shot-"

Wai already had his phone out and was calling the ambulance, praying that he wasn't too late.

):):)

"Wai, wait up!"

"Are you okay?"

Before he could respond, Wai found himself engulfed in Safe and Louis' arms. Both of them hugged him tightly, making it a little hard to breathe.

"We heard someone got shot near your bar," explained Safe.

"And we came to make sure you're okay," added Louis.

"I'm fine," replied Wai. "Pat was the one who got shot."

Safe and Louis' eyes widened. That was clearly news to them.

"Look, I need to find Pran first," said Wai. "Have you seen him?"

"Yeah, he said he was going to get Pat something to drink from the café," replied Louis.

That was good. If Pran was out getting a drink for Pat, then his boyfriend must be doing alright. But when Wai saw his best friend in the café with a worried frown, he knew that was not the case.

"Hey," Wai greeted softly.

Pran looked up, blinking as he stared, like he couldn't believe that Wai was standing before him. Their fight echoed in the silence between them, and Wai waited. If Pran was going to reject his attempt to reach out, Wai would leave without a word and try again later...

The fact that Wai even thought that showed how little he understood Pran even after the years they've known each other.

"Hey," Pran returned, a hint of gladness glimmering through the worry in his eyes. It wasn't much, but it was an indication that he was accepting Wai's attempt to reach out.

"How's Pat?" Wai asked, sitting down across the table from Pran, Safe and Louis joining him.

Pran's frown deepened. "Physically, he's fine. The bullet didn't hit anything vital, or even hit him clean. So, he'll make full recovery from that." Pran did not look glad though. "But..."

Wai watched as Pran trailed off. "But?" He prompted.

Pran stared down at the table. "But the police recovered the gun from the scene. Pat's fingerprints were all over it and they're going to charge him with illegal firearms possession."

"What? That's ridiculous! That asshole must have thrown the gun-"

"Yeah, but Pat grabbed it during the brawl. The gun's not registered too, so Pat's prints are the only indication of possession right now."

"Is there anything I can do?" asked Wai. "I can testify to the police! I saw him with the gun first-"

Pran looked grateful, but he shook his head. "We're going to need to some hard evidence." He sighed and stood up. "I'm going back to Pat. I'll see you guys later."

Wai watched as Pran's forlorn figure left the café. For once, the thought of Pran and Pat together didn't make his heart twinge with jealousy. Wai was more worried about Pran getting hurt in all this. As well as the fact that he felt indebted to Pat for standing up to the thug.

These thoughts occupied Wai's mind as he headed for the bar after classes. It was funny, he had worked there since starting uni, but the place had menacing aura now. Wai's legs felt heavy as he entered it. The back of his neck prickled unpleasantly as he changed into his work uniform, feeling exposed and vulnerable. Even as he got to mopping the floor, the dark corners all seemed alive to him, and Wai couldn't help but fear that the thug might come leaping out the shadows with his gun. His paranoia got worse as he reached the area where the bastard had first pulled the gun on Wai. The fear made him sweat a little as he glanced around, knowing the area was clear but still feeling scared. Even the red glow from the CCTV camera seemed alive as it watched-

The CCTV camera.

All his fears forgotten, Wai tossed the mop aside and ran for the security room.

):):)

"Hey, did it help?"

Even on the phone's screen, Pran's dimpled smile was radiant, and Wai's heart stopped like it did whenever he saw that smile.

"Yeah, the police were able to track him down and arrest him," replied Pran. "No charges for Pat. Thanks, Wai."

"Sure thing," answered Wai before he took a deep breath. "Is Pat there?"

The phone shifted and suddenly Pat's face was on the screen.

"Hey," greeted Wai. "How are you doing?"

Pat grinned. "A little sore, but otherwise all good."

"That's good," said Wai. "Look, thanks for helping me out. But don't be so reckless again." He forced a smile onto his face for the next words. "My best friend nearly became a widow, you know?"

Pat laughed. "Alright, next time I'll just let them shoot your ass instead."

Wai chuckled reluctantly at that as Pat glanced off-screen at something.

"Oh, I don't think my wife finds that funny," said Pat, chuckling.

"Yeah, well..." Wai trailed off, his heart clenching at the reference. "Get well soon, Pat. I'll see you around, okay?"

"Sure."

):):)

Later in the day, there was a knock on his door. Wai looked up from his assignment and went to answer it.

It was Pran, and he looked deadly serious.

"We need to talk."

Pran sounded ominous, and it made Wai uneasy as he stepped aside to let him enter. As he swung the door close, Wai turned to Pran, about to offer him a drink-

"What the hell is wrong with you?"

Wai blinked, taken aback at the intensity in Pran's eyes. His best friend's emotions were swirling in those dark, soulful eyes that Wai would have gladly drowned in, but couldn't. So, he turned away, looking at the floor instead.

"What's wrong, Pran?" he asked.

Pran reached out, grabbing Wai by the chin, forcing him to look into those beautiful eyes.

"That guy pulled a gun on you," whispered Pran, his voice trembling. "Why did I have to see it in the video? Why didn't you tell me?"

"I...I didn't think it mattered," Wai answered honestly, surprised by Pran's behaviour. His best friend's eyes blazed at this, and he grabbed Wai by the shirt, pulling him close.

"Didn't matter?" Pran repeated incredulously. "Why the fuck would you think that? Wai, you could have been shot, you idiot! Why do you think that wouldn't matter to me?!"

"B-but I didn't get shot," Wai stammered, rattled by Pran's anger. "Pat did, and there was the whole thing with the police. I just didn't think that it was...important."

"How could it not be important?!" snarled Pran, practically shaking Wai. "Damn it, Wai! I could have lost you! It could have been you in the hospital right now! Or worse-"

Wai was startled to see that Pran looked almost tearful.

"I-I'm sorry," whispered Wai. "But...after what I did...I didn't think-"

"You think that I would have been glad to see you get shot just because of that?" hissed Pran. "You stupid fool. What you did sucked, but do you really think I'd want to see you bleeding out in the street-"

Pran pulled Wai into a hug, and suddenly, his own eyes were feeling hot and wet.

"I'd deserve it," Wai whispered, blinking back the tears that were threatening to fall.

"Shut up," Pran murmured. "Yeah, you broke my heart when you dropped the curtain, but it would have killed me if something had happened to you, Wai. I love you. You're my best friend."

Wai's heart broke again at that, but he returned the hug.

"I'm sorry," said Wai softly. "I'm so sorry for what I did, Pran. I...you didn't deserve that. I regretted it the moment it happened, but I was so hurt and angry-"

Pran pulled back, looking at Wai with those intense eyes that always took his breath away.

"Why? Why were you so angry? Was it just because I hid it from you?"

"That was one thing...but the truth is...I was jealous."

Pran frowned, looking puzzled. "Jealous? Why?"

Because I love you.

"Because you were pulling away from me," was what Wai said instead. "You were suddenly always too busy to spend time with me. You didn't seem to care that I wasn't around. I...I was lonely."

"Wai..."

Because I knew you were with Pat, not with me.

"So, when I heard you and Pat backstage...I got angry and hurt."

Because you sounded so happy with him. You were never like that with me.

"And when I realised it was Pat...after everything he and his gang did to me...I felt betrayed. And I lost my head..."

And destroyed any hope I had of ever having you.

Wai stared at the floor, willing himself not to cry. "But it doesn't change the fact that I betrayed you, Pran. I wrecked our friendship in the heat of the moment. And even when you kept trying to reach out to me after...I pushed you away out of spite."

No, not spite. Because I couldn't face the truth; that you weren't mine.

"I don't expect you to forgive me, Pran. But I'm sorry. I'm so sorry for hurting you-"

Pran pulled him into another hug. "I forgive you," he whispered into Wai's ear.

"You shouldn't," answered Wai, closing his eyes.

"But I do," replied Pran. "And I'm sorry too. I didn't realise that you were feeling neglected-"

"No, don't do that," said Wai. "Don't make it sound like you did something wrong. It's not your fault; you didn't know how I was feeling. I'm the one in the wrong here."

Pran's arms tightened around him, warm and comforting, and Wai couldn't stop himself from imagining what it would be like to be held not as Pran's best friend, but as his boyfriend. He buried his face into Pran's shoulder, inhaling the scent of his best friend that he so loved...

"Alright," said Pran. "Then you can make it up to me. How does that sound?"

Wai roused himself from his imagination. "Sounds good. I can do that."

"Good."

"Yeah, good."

Pran kissed Wai on the cheek. "I love you, brother. Don't you ever forget that."

The warm lips and the tender words shattered Wai's heart, but he forced himself to smile.

"I love you too, Pran," he whispered, knowing that Pran would never know the true depth of his words.

):):)

Wai congratulated himself as he cheered alongside his friends. Pat was walking up the stairs to Pran, loudly declaring his love for Wai's best friend in front of the whole Architecture faculty. Safe and Louis both threw their arms over Wai's shoulders as they cooed.

The pain that bloomed in Wai's heart as Pran and Pat fist-bumped was now a familiar sensation. He was still jealous, but Wai had accepted that he could only ever be a friend to Pran, so he sucked it up as he applauded the scene.

As though he wasn't hurting inside.

Later, Pran sought him out, inviting him for a hang out. He even brought Wai a Japanese crepe, filled with so much sweet goodness that Wai knew he'd need to work it off in the gym later.

"So, what's up?" asked Wai as he took a bite.

Pran looked at him shiftily. "I thought it's time that we all properly made peace with each other."

"Peace?" Wai frowned. "What peace? I already apologised to Pat about the curtain, and I'm okay with you two dating."

That last part wasn't a lie. Wai was okay with Pran dating Pat. He had accepted that the Engineering student made his best friend happy in ways that Wai never could.

It didn't mean Wai was any less jealous, but he wasn't angry about it anymore.

Or so he told himself.

"I'm not talking about Pat," replied Pran as he led Wai over to a table.

"Then who-?"

Wai froze. Seated beside Pat was Korn. They both locked eyes and stared each other down before Korn nodded his head in greeting. Wai didn't return it.

Pat and Pran were looking between them nervously. "We thought you two should clear up any bad blood between you," Pran suggested.

Bad blood indeed.

Wai had hated Pat because of the whole Engineering-Architecture feud, and later really hated him because of the whole thing with Pran. But the one who had been a true thorn in his side was Korn. It was always Korn who had led the others in tormenting Wai. It was Korn that Wai always sought out in their fights.

And yet, Wai had noticed how Korn had eased up on him since their initial confrontation after the curtain incident. He had noticed how Korn actually stood up for him, getting the others to ease up in their punishment. Now that Wai thought about it, his interactions with Korn had been much more civil since then.

It was confusing.

That Korn was actively trying to make peace with, even joking around with Pran in teasing Wai, effectively threw him off-balance. It was confusing Wai.

"Korn, can you walk Wai home?" Pran asked as they were getting ready to leave an hour later.

"What? Why?" demanded Wai.

"You attract too much trouble," chided Pran. "I need someone to keep you out of it."

"I don't need someone to walk me back!" protested Wai. "I can handle myself!"

"You handling yourself got me shot, remember?" Pat said cheerfully.

"That's low," complained Wai. "Besides, if I'm a trouble magnet, what do you call this guy?" He jerked his thumb at Korn, who grinned widely.

"Hm...that's actually a good point," admitted Pran.

"Hey!" Korn protested, but he was laughing.

"Two negatives make a positive," replied Pat. "It'll be fine. Korn, keep Wai out of trouble, okay?"

"No problem," said Korn. "The only person allowed to kick his ass from now on is me." He threw an arm around Wai's shoulder, winking at him. "Let's go, baby."

"Don't call me baby, asshole!"

):):)

Once the initial joking had passed, Korn had grown quiet. His presence walking at Wai's side was disconcerting. All their previous interactions had involved them fighting, arguing or talking. To have Korn so quiet beside him was almost nerve-wracking.

"So...this is me," said Wai when they finally reached his apartment building. "I guess...thanks for walking me back."

Korn smiled. "Almost sounds like we were on a date."

"You wish," said Wai, with no venom in his voice at all. He turned to leave.

"Wai, wait."

He turned back to Korn, who was shuffling his feet and staring everywhere except Wai's face.

"What is it?" asked Wai.

Korn glanced at his face and looked away again. "I just want to say...thanks for calling the ambulance that night."

"Oh," Wai wasn't sure how to respond to that. It hadn't felt like anything special, just the right thing to do. "You don't need to thank me for that. I mean, you guys could have done that yourself-"

"But we didn't," replied Korn. "We were panicking too much before we even thought about calling. It...it could have been bad."

Wai shook his head. "The bullet didn't hit anything vital, so Pat would have been fine either way-"

"Yeah, but we didn't know that at the time," snapped Korn. "We thought he was dying in our arms, and you called the ambulance...so just take my thanks, damn it."

Wai scoffed, though he smiled a little at that. "Fine. You're welcome. Well, good-"

"I'm sorry too."

Feeling like the day was never going to end, Wai turned back to Korn. "Sorry for what?"

Korn was looking at him now, his gaze steady and determined. "About what we did to you at your work."

Wai stared in disbelief. That had been the last thing he expected. Korn flushed and turned his gaze back to the ground.

"It...that was a shit thing we did to you," Korn continued. "It was low and cowardly, taking advantage of you when you could have lost your job if you retaliated. And...all the things we said about it after..."

"What brought this on?" asked Wai.

Korn looked up at Wai briefly before looking away again. "I saw what that guy was doing to you and thought he was a real creep...then it hit me that we did the same thing to you. It was like looking in a mirror and well...I didn't like what I saw." He sighed. "And since Pat and Pran are together, we should make peace with each other...so I wanted to do this right." He looked up at Wai again. "So...in the spirit of our new friendship...I'm truly sorry for what I did to you."

Friends?

With Korn?

It was shocking that Wai didn't object to the idea outright.

Instead, he smirked and folded his arms across his chest. "Just because Pat and Pran are dating, it doesn't mean we have to be friends."

Korn grinned that familiar, cocky smile. "No, I guess not. What about boyfriends?"

Wai chuckled. "Slow down, tiger. You haven't even bought me dinner yet."

"I can take you now, if you like?"

That made Wai laugh. "I have work later. But...thanks, Korn. For the apology, I mean. I appreciate it."

Korn smiled sincerely and held out his hand. "Friends?"

Wai took it, not quite believing that after over a year of endless fights and all the recent drama, they had gotten to this point.

"Friends."

):):)

"Wai, what the hell is going on with you?"

P'Rai crossed his arms, anger and disappointment rolling off him in waves. Wai bowed his head, ashamed. He just had a nightmare of a shift, where it seemed that everything had gone wrong. The worst part was that this had been going on for the last two weeks.

"I'm...I'm sorry, P'Rai..."

"If it was just one or two things, I could let it slide," continued his boss. "But it seems like you can't get anything right lately!" The older man sighed. "I think...maybe this job's not for you..."

"No! Please, P, I need this! I'm sorry, I just have a lot on my mind now! I'll do better, P, I promise!"

P'Rai hesitated at Wai's plea.

"Please, P," Wai continued. "You know I'm a good worker. It's just...I've been having a tough time and it's been bugging me. Please, P'Rai, give me one more chance.

The older man softened. "Alright, one last chance," he said. "I understand if things are tough for you, but you can't bring this with you to work. If you fuck up this badly again...I'm sorry but I'll have to fire you." P'Rai sighed. "You know what, take tomorrow off and get your head right." He paused. "Maybe talk to your friends."

Wai gave a grateful wai. "Thank you, P'Rai."

His boss nodded. "Go on. Get out of here."

His day did not get better as his bike refused to start, stuttering despite his attempts. It was only after several tries that Wai noticed that the fuel gauge was empty. The thought of having to get petrol and come back to refuel before he could get home was the last straw.

"Fuck!" roared Wai, kicking the wall of the alleyway where he had parked. He sat on his bike, burying his face in his hands, taking deep, shuddering breaths.

"Tough night?"

Wai looked up, surprised to see Korn there.

"What are you doing here?" asked Wai.

"For a drink," replied Korn, pointing back at the bar.

"I didn't see you."

"You seemed like you were having a tough night. I didn't want to bother you. I was counting the number of drinks you spilled though."

Wai laughed bitterly at that. "Sorry you had to see that."

Korn took a step closer. "Something wrong with your bike?"

"Out of fuel."

"I see. Come on."

Wai looked up again. "What? Why?"

Korn looked puzzled. "You need fuel, right? I'll take you."

"You don't have to."

"I want to."

"Really, Korn, you don't-"

"We're friends, aren't we? Let me help you."

When Wai hesitated, Korn offered his hand. "It's okay to need help, Wai. You don't have to go through everything yourself."

Still, Wai hesitated. Snorting irritably, Korn took Wai's hand and pulled him over to where he had parked his own bike.

"Thanks," muttered Wai, taking the helmet Korn offered him.

"Actually, do you want to get something to eat? You look like you could use it."

That sounded wonderful to Wai, but still, he hesitated. "But then, the fuel-"

"Tell you what: I'll take you to get something to eat. Then you can come rest at my place, since it's nearby. We'll leave early tomorrow morning to get your fuel and I'll bring you back here. How does that sound?"

It sounded good. Way better than walking alone by himself at night while carrying fuel. But still, Wai hesitated. Not least because this was Korn, with whom he had been enemies not so long ago. But now, Korn was freely offering his help like it was nothing.

Like they had been friends forever.

Seeing Wai's hesitance, Korn smiled. "Is it so terrible for me to help you? Come on, I thought we're starting off on a fresh slate?"

For the first time in a week, Wai smiled. "Okay. Thank you."

):):)

Korn took Wai to a roadside stall. As they waited for the food to arrive, Wai wondered what to talk about with the other man. Fortunately, he was spared the effort.

"I have to say, that was the worst service I've ever seen from you. And that's including the times when it looked like you wanted to poison our drinks."

Wai huffed a small laugh. "Don't make me regret not doing it."

Korn chuckled before he grew serious. "So, what was going on? What put you off?"

"It's nothing, Korn. Just a bunch of things happened, and it's been bugging me."

They both fell silent as their food arrive. Wai couldn't stop himself from scoffing down the meatballs and broth, not realising until then just how hungry he was. He tried to ignore the way Korn was looking at him.

Like he was concerned.

"You...you looked spooked at work," said Korn at last, making Wai pause. "Like you were scared of something."

"Yeah, you'd be spooked too if some asshole pulled a gun on you at work," Wai said without thinking, only realising it when Korn's eyes widened. "Shit, I didn't mean-"

"So that's it?" Korn asked. "You're scared something like that could happen again?"

"No. Forget about it," said Wai, staring down at his soup. Korn rolled his eyes.

"Wai, you don't have to act tough all the time-"

"Fine," snapped Wai. "Yes, I'm scared. If it happened before, it could happen again. I keep thinking that he might have escaped the police and show up again, and this time I wouldn't be so lucky. I'm scared to go the quiet areas of the bar, where I can get cornered. I'm scared someone could just pull a gun on me right in the crowd. I don't feel safe there. There, you happy?"

Korn didn't look put off by Wai's rant. It was as though he knew the angry tone was merely a shield to hide his vulnerability. It was almost comforting yet disturbing to see understanding in Korn's eyes.

"Why didn't you talk to anyone?" asked Korn. "Pran, Safe, Louis?"

Wai crossed his arms and looked away.

"You can't possibly be that prideful, Wai."

"I outed my best friend because I was mad he kept his relationship a secret from me," said Wai bitterly. "So yeah, I think I can be that prideful."

That should do it. That should provoke anger out of Korn and force him to leave Wai alone. He can handle the fuel situation for his bike himself, he didn't-

"Is that what this is about?" Korn's voice was soft. "You're still beating yourself up over that?"

Wai...had not expected that. He slowly turned to face Korn, genuinely surprised. Korn was frowning at him, not with anger but with true concern. Wai wanted to run away, but Korn's eyes pinned him to his seat, leaving him frozen.

"You already apologised to them, didn't you?" Korn asked. "They forgave you, didn't they?"

"Do you really think apologising makes up for what I did?" Wai asked. "That Pran and Pat forgave me at all just proves that they're good people. It doesn't take away that what I did to them was shit." Wai sighed. "Lately...I just feel like I don't deserve to be Pran's friend."

And I definitely don't deserve to love him.

"But you're doing your best to make up for it, aren't you?" Korn pointed out.

"Can I ever truly make up for betraying my best friend?"

Silence.

Wai sighed, staring down at his food, his appetite gone. It was a lot, revealing that he had been traumatised by the gun incident. He knew keeping it bottled up wasn't doing him any good, but after restoring his friendship with Pran, Wai didn't want to just unload his problems on him like the old days. Wai felt like Pran shouldn't have to deal with his mess after what Wai did.

"Well, since you're already talking to me...you can unload on me."

Korn's voice was kind, and it genuinely shocked Wai to hear him speak like that. He stared up at the Engineering student, mouth slightly open. Korn had a cautious smile on his face.

"If you're having trouble forgiving yourself now...just come talk to me," said Korn. "I'm not exactly a wise guy, and I can't promise I'll have any answers, but I'll listen to you. Help you take a load off." When Wai still stared in stunned silence, Korn continued. "As for your problem at work...tell you what, I'll come to the bar on your shifts whenever I'm free. That way, if you're ever feeling scared or overwhelmed, you can just come to me. If I'm not in, just call me. How does that sound?"

"W-why are you being so nice?" Wai asked, astounded by Korn's offer. "I-is there something you want from me?"

Korn snorted. "We're friends now, aren't we?"

Friends.

Wai had thought that their new label was simply perfunctory. Something they slapped onto each other in response to Pat and Pran's relationship. Wai hadn't thought that it actually meant anything to Korn.

But apparently, he was wrong about that.

Korn was waiting patiently for his response.

"You...you'd really do that for me?" asked Wai. "After everything in the past?"

The Engineering student shrugged. "It's in the past, Wai. Yeah, we beat each other up before, but now we're friends. So, let's just be better than we were, yeah? Now, do you like my idea or not?"

Wai couldn't stop himself from smiling. "Yeah, that sounds good. Thank you, Korn."

Korn stared at him. "You know, when you smile for real, you're actually kind of pretty."

That flustered Wai. "What do you mean, 'pretty'? I'm not a girl, the right word is 'handsome'!"

Korn grinned. "Don't you know? You and Pran are listed on the university's Pretty Boy fan page. Apparently, you're an 8 out of 10 on the prettiness scale."

For reasons unknown to himself, that made Wai's face heat up.

"Oh wow, you're actually prettier when you blush."

"Stop calling me that!"

"Nope, I think that's my nickname for you now: Pretty Boy."

"Asshole!"

"Yeah sure, that can be your nickname for me."

"Korn!"

They both couldn't stop themselves from laughing, briefly lifting the melancholy that had been surrounding Wai.

):):)

"Wai, your boyfriend is here."

Frowning, Wai looked up from his food into Louis and Safe's grinning faces. Beside them, Pat and Pran were also chuckling.

"He’s not my boyfriend.”

"Hey, Pretty Boy."

Korn dropped into the empty seat beside him, throwing an arm around Wai's shoulder. Safe and Louis hooted teasingly as Wai rolled his eyes, although his cheeks felt slightly warm.

"Asshole," he muttered without real heat. Korn's grin made him smile though, and he turned back to his food.

"Wait, so when you said liked someone in Architecture, you meant Wai?" Pat said excitedly, making Wai look up again.

"He's not my boyfriend," he retorted, trying to ignore the interested look on Pran's face. "He's just being dumb."

"You know, considering it wasn't that long ago you both were at each other's throats, you guys look pretty comfortable with each other," commented Safe.

"Yeah Wai, you're practically on his lap," added Louis.

Wai glanced at Korn and saw that the other man was, indeed, sitting very closely, his leg and body practically leaning against Wai's, not to mention the arm around his shoulders.

"Don't sit so close," he said to Korn. Instead, Korn leaned closer.

"Nope."

"Why not?"

"I want to show the entire university that we're friends now. No more wars between Architecture and Engineering."

"Don't you mean 'boyfriends'?" teased Pat, and Korn laughed.

Wai couldn't stop himself from smiling. Korn had been going out of his way to show everyone that and Wai were no longer fighting. Where before they had only ever fought upon coming into contact with each other, now they were practically joined at the hip. Korn had taken to walking with Wai everywhere on campus, spending time with him whenever they were free. Some of the more hard-headed seniors had called Korn 'the Architect's dog' but Korn had merely barked mockingly in response.

As for Wai, after the initial discomfort of having Korn all up in his space, found that he liked having the Engineering student around. Korn was exuberant, a nice foil to Wai's quieter demeanour. He was freer with his affections, never hesitating to touch Wai on the shoulders, or ruffle his hair, or pinch his cheek. It was nice.

What was nicer though, was that Korn had kept his word and showed up at the bar whenever Wai was on shift. He couldn't believe it at first when he saw the familiar ponytail and thick eyebrows sitting at one the tables near the counter. Thinking it was merely a coincidence, Wai had kept his distance, trying to focus on his work. But when the fears were starting to get to him, Korn had been there.

"I told you to come to me if it's getting too much for you," Korn had said, his voice gentle.

"I-I thought..." Wai had stammered, but Korn had shaken his head

"Come on, you need this job, right? Deep breaths and relax. I'm here for you. Just look for me if you're feeling freaked out "

And it had worked. Having Korn around gave Wai an anchor of sorts. When the paranoia and fear started becoming too much, Wai would look to where Korn was sitting. The Engineering student would be watching him, a small smile on his face as he nodded encouragingly.

I'm still here. You can do this.

Somehow, having Korn helped Wai keep his fears at bay. The first time Korn had been unable to come, he had called Wai just before his shift to joke around with him, which greatly lifted his mood. Wai would receive texts from Korn as he went on with his shift, and just knowing that there was someone thinking about him...it made things easier for Wai.

Before long, Korn would send Wai to work and pick him up whenever he was available. And somehow Wai just fell into it, getting used to hanging out with Korn for a quick bite after work, and occasionally sleeping over at each other's places.

Naturally, their friends had noticed the growing closeness between them. Hence, the endless jokes about them being a couple. Wai had gotten so used to it that it didn't even phase him anymore, while Korn had simply went along with the joke, playfully flirting with Wai in front of their friends.

"Are you sure you and Korn aren't dating?" Pran had asked one day as they were looking for sources in the library.

Wai sighed. "We're not. We just hang out a lot."

"Could have fooled me," said Pran. "A lot of people think you two are an item, you know?"

"Why so curious? Are you jealous?" Wai teased, though his heart twinged a little with hope.

Pran chuckled. "I'm just saying...it wouldn't surprise me if Korn actually liked you."

"Of course, he likes me; we're friends now."

"I mean romantically, Wai."

The thought hadn't even occurred to Wai, and he wasn't going to entertain hypothetics. He shrugged dismissively. "If he did, he had plenty of chances to confess to me. But he never did, so I guess he doesn't like me that way."

It was Pran's turn to shrug. "Maybe there's a reason he hasn't. Confessing isn't always so straightforward, you know?"

Wai froze. There was something in the way Pran said that that made Wai wonder if he somehow knew the secret he had hidden for years. He glanced over at his best friend, but Pran had turned away, reaching to pick up another book.

"Anyway, I'm glad you two are getting along so well," said Pran. "I'm just saying that if it turns down that Korn does like you...don't panic, okay? Keep your mind and heart open."

"Why would I panic?" Wai asked, affronted, and Pran laughed softly

"I'm your best friend, Wai. You're not exactly smooth when it comes to matters of the heart."

Another nice thing about Korn being so close with him now, was that it didn't hurt so much for Wai to see Pran and Pat being in love with each other. Yes, his heart still ached when he saw Pran showering Pat with affection and vice versa, but it ached a little less when Korn was there to distract him. The ponytailed idiot had a way of turning Pran and Pat's PDAs into a sappy joke that always made Wai laugh. The laughter always helped to sooth the pain in his heart.

Wai couldn't even understand why he and Korn had fought so much in the past. It was a waste he thought, that one year they spent being enemies, knowing that they could have had this wonderful friendship a lot sooner if they hadn't been so stupid. With Korn, Wai felt seen and understood in ways that he hadn't before, not even with Pran.

It made him happy.

Unfortunately, he would soon realise that Korn saw and understood him all too well.

):):)

Like he had so many times since they had become friends, Korn dropped Wai off at his dorm.

"Thanks, Korn," said Wai, clambering off the bike and handing Korn his helmet back. He checked the time. "It's pretty late. Do you want to sleep over? Your apartment's far from here-"

"Actually, there's something I wanted to talk to you about."

Wai smiled. "Is this what you've been thinking about all night?" Their friends had all came to the bar that night, having a raucous drinking session. Wai couldn't help but notice that Korn had been much quieter than usual, not even teasing Pran and Pat when they were being all lovey dovey.

"You could tell?" Korn asked.

"Yeah, usually you'd be begging me to save you from the sight of Pat being such a lovesick puppy," joked Wai, glad that he was now able to joke about Pran and Pat without feeling like his heart was cracking.

Korn chuckled before he grew serious. "Actually, that's what I want to talk to you about."

Wai cocked his head in curiosity, waiting as Korn took a deep breath.

"You know I'm not exactly subtle, Wai. So, I'm not going to beat around the bush. I'm just going to ask you directly," he looked Wai in the eye. "Are you in love with Pran?"

Wai's heart stopped. His face froze. His lungs stopped working. Every fibre of his being had come to a complete halt.

Korn waited, but Wai said nothing, too shocked to say anything. That seemed to be enough for Korn.

"Shit...so it's true?"

Still nothing from Wai, and Korn was looking discomfited.

"I...I was still wondering why you always looked a little uncomfortable whenever Pat and Pran do their thing. Then I remembered Pat saying something about him wondering if you and Pran were a thing before...all this. Then the whole thing with the curtain...how upset you were when you found out about them, it seemed like more than just you being angry that Pran didn't tell you, you know? So, it just hit me-"

"Shut up."

Wai's voice was soft, barely above a whisper. Korn looked into his face; his expression becoming stricken when he realised how upset Wai was.

"Shit, Wai," he got off his bike and went to him. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-"

Korn's hands were already reaching to touch Wai's shoulders, to offer him comfort, but he jerked away.

"Don't touch me."

"Wai, I'm really sorry. I didn't realise how much this was hurting you. It's tough, watching someone you lo-"

"Don't fucking say it."

Korn froze. He seemed to be struggling internally, as though he wasn't sure if he should keep talking or just leave it. Wai didn't know which could be worse: letting Korn plough on or letting him just walk away now that the other man knew his long held secret.

"If..." Korn said slowly. "...if you're scared I'm going to tell, then don't be. It's not my place to do that."

That was indeed one of Wai's deepest fears. But it was nothing compared to his paranoia suddenly making him wonder if this was the reason that Korn had been so nice to him: to get close enough to find Wai's deepest secret so that he could get him where it hurt the most.

Wai hoped that wasn't true. He didn't want to believe that Korn could be capable of such a thing.

It would kill him.

"But...Wai...it's okay to be in-" Korn hesitated when Wai's eyes flashed. "...to feel for him the way you do. It's not wrong-"

"Stop talking, Korn," Wai said softly, his voice breaking. Korn clearly heard it, because he tried to reach out again.

"Wai-"

He turned away, not wanting to see Korn's pity. It made him feel so pathetic and vulnerable. He ran to his dorm, ignoring Korn calling to him. He slammed his door shut and locked it, slumping down on the floor. Wai's whole body was trembling, and he just felt so vulnerable.

There was knocking on his door.

"Wai? I'm sorry for upsetting you," Korn sounded panicked. "Please, let me in."

"Go away, Korn."

"Don't shut me out. Please, Wai. W-we don't have to talk, just let me be there for you."

Wai buried his face in his hands, wondering why Korn was still being so kind now that he knew Wai's secret. He didn't need to pretend anymore.

But he's not pretending, is he?

"Please, just leave me alone," Wai pleaded.

"Wai...please..."

But Wai didn't answer, staying silent as Korn kept knocking and calling to him. It seemed to go on forever before it abruptly came to a halt. The silence that followed was deafening, oppressive, pressing onto Wai from all sides.

Slowly, Wai curled up into a little ball on the floor, trembling.

All alone.

):):)

Korn wasn't at the bar when Wai's next shift came around.

Wai wasn't surprised. He hadn't seen Korn for the last two days, or anyone else for that matter. Keeping himself locked in his dorm saw to that. If he looked gaunt and haggard, his boss said nothing, merely raising an eyebrow when Wai clocked in.

As he began to set up the tables, Wai glanced at the place where Korn normally sat. He wasn't expecting Korn to come, not after what had happened.

Wai had probably pushed him away.

He tried to tell himself it was okay, but his heart still ached at the thought.

As his shift ground on, Wai realised that he wasn't okay at all. His paranoia was surging in full force. Only this time, it wasn't just gun-totting thugs lurking in the shadows, but also Pran, storming in and confronting Wai about his feelings. Wai couldn't help thinking about the look of shock on Pran's face, or disgust and maybe anger.

He was still able to barely focus on work, but Wai knew it was a matter of time before he fucked up. His hands were shaking so badly that he had to keep clenching them in a futile attempt to make them stop. Time and again, Wai kept looking over to the table where Korn usually sat, but he wasn't there.

Korn with his soothing presence that helped calm and steady Wai. When had the ponytailed man become such a vital presence in his life?

And suddenly Wai couldn't bear it any longer. He pulled out his phone, hoping to see a reassuring text from Korn.

Nothing.

Swallowing, Wai opened his chat with Korn. He wondered what to type. Should he just ask Korn to come? Would it sound like begging? Would it sound like he was missing Korn? Because it was all true. Wai was missing him.

A big hand landed on his shoulder, making Wai jump.

"Look alive, Wai," said P'Rai. "Your boyfriend's here."

Not even bothering to deny the label, Wai's head turned so quickly, he might have given himself whiplash.

Korn had indeed arrived, looking haggard and tired. But he was there, and Wai suddenly felt calmer. He made his way over to Korn.

"Hey," he greeted softly.

Korn looked up at him. "Hey," he returned. "I'm sorry I'm late. But I had assignments due, and it took forever to settle. I was going to text you, but I accidentally left my phone in Mo's bag. And the traffic was so shit today-"

"You came," Wai's voice was soft, full of relief and a hint of disbelief.

The other man looked bemused. "Well, of course. I promised I'd be here for you, didn't I?"

"I-I didn't think you would...after what happened..."

Korn stared down at the table. "Yeah, I'm sorry about that. I'm sorry I didn't reach out to you the past two days...but I thought you might need some space..."

"I'm sorry too," said Wai. "It's just...you caught me off guard..and I just..."

"It's okay, Wai," Korn patted him on the shoulder. Wai couldn't stop himself at the touch. He leaned over and hugged Korn. He felt the other man stiffen in surprise, before relaxing, wrapping his arms around Wai.

Wai didn't know how long they stayed that way before P'Rai was standing behind him, clearing his throat.

"Look, I'm all for young love. But could you keep it strictly outside of your working hours? You have a job to do, Wai."

"Sorry, P," said Wai, letting Korn go and blushing a little. The way Korn's hands lingered on his waist comforted him though, and suddenly, Wai's shift didn't feel so awful anymore.

):):)

The familiar smell of noodles and meatballs from their favourite post-work stall wafted between them, the silence comfortable. Wai took his time, slowly savouring the meal. He was aware of the way Korn was staring at him, but it didn't feel uncomfortable. He knew Korn wanted to talk and was gathering his thoughts. So, Wai waited, already able to guess what the other man wanted to talk about.

"So...how long have you had feelings for...you know?"

Wai slowly chewed his food to buy himself some time. He had never talked about his feelings to anyone, having kept that secret close to his heart for years. He wondered if he should share, potentially leaving himself vulnerable again.

Korn lowered his eyes. "Sorry. You don't have to answer if you don't want to..."

The way the other man deflated softened Wai, just a little. Perhaps it was time he opened up and shared.

"Since school."

Korn looked up again, looking surprised. "That long?"

Wai nodded. "Yes."

"And you never confessed?"

"Pran had a girl confess to him that he rejected back then," explained Wai, stirring his noodles. "When I asked him why, he said he wasn't interested in a relationship at the time. And...I think he was in love with someone else."

"So, you kept it to yourself this whole time?"

"Yeah...I was going to confess after we won the music competition," Wai shrugged. "But then Pat happened."

"Pat?"

"He was there when I sent Pran home. I'm not sure what exactly Pat said, but Pran was looking all panicky...and I jumped in. Nearly got into a fight with Pat...would have gotten into a fight if Pran hadn't stopped me. That was the first time I suspected something going on between them."

"The first time? What else happened?"

"The beach trip. Pat was aggravating me and the other Architecture boys with the way he kept going after Pran. I...wasn't sure then, but I knew I didn't like it. So, we were going to teach Pat a lesson-"

"Hang on," Korn's expression had darkened. "You were going to gang up on him?"

"Yes," Wai answered calmly. "We thought he had bad intentions for Pran-"

"Don't you think that's cowardly? A bunch of you attacking one guy?"

"No more cowardly than what you guys did to me," shot back Wai. Korn flushed, bowing his head as he stared back. The spectre of their past fights hung heavy between them: how Korn and his gang had cornered Wai in that alley and forced him to call his friends for help or fight them all by himself. The humiliation they had inflicted on Wai while at work. Though they were now friends, the past still haunted them in some way.

"You're right," Korn acknowledged. "For what it's worth, I'm-"

"You've already apologised for it, Korn," Wai cut in, his tone gentler. "Let's just leave it at that."

Korn smiled and nodded gratefully. "So, you said you were 'going' to teach him a lesson?"

Wai nodded. "Pran stopped us. He came up with some bullshit story about him getting dumped by a girl and asked us to drink with him. For me, that confirmed that there was something going on with him and Pat. I just didn't know what." He paused. "Or maybe I already did, but just didn't want to face the truth."

"How did you know Pran was lying?"

That made Wai smile. "Pran is a master at deflecting, but he's a shit liar. Plus, there's the fact that Pran is gay."

"You sure about that? Maybe Pran's bi?"

Wai rolled his eyes. "Oh please. I'm bi. Pran is about as straight as a Twisties."

"How could you be so sure?"

"His mom accidentally outed him to me. And even before that, Pran never even glanced at any of the girls that threw themselves at him. He didn't even blink at that Namtan Tipnaree bikini pic, and that is one fine woman..."

"Oh yeah," agreed Korn.

"Plus, there was also the time I borrowed Pran's shower and caught him staring at my abs while I was drying off."

Korn chuckled. "Can't blame him. You have fine abs."

That made Wai blush a little. "When did you see them?"

"Sometimes when we fought, your shirt would ride up your body and...well, I can appreciate a fine body as much as the next guy."

"You were perving on me in the middle of a fight? What a creep."

Another chuckle from Korn before he grew serious again. "Go on, what else made you sure about Pat and Pran?"

Wai grew sombre. "It's a little painful to talk about..."

"Oh. You don't have to if you don't want to."

"Well, I've never talked about this with anyone...it's kind of cathartic," Wai sighed. "It was two things, actually. First, I noticed Pran growing distant and more secretive. We used to talk about everything, you know? Suddenly he was deflecting my questions about what was going on with him...and suddenly he was too busy to spend time with me...I was feeling lonely."

"What about Safe and Louis?"

"Those two have their own thing. Sometimes I actually feel lonelier if it's just me with them. It was fine when Pran was always around. But then..."

"He wasn't," Korn finished.

Wai nodded. "He wasn't. Not anymore."

"And the other thing?"

"When Pran did hang out with me...he was weird. He was almost flirting with me...at times he was actually flirting with me. Imagine what that did to me, what with my feelings for him."

Korn inhaled. "Shit. You must have-"

"Felt hopeful, yeah. I didn't want to believe it at first. I kept telling myself I was imagining it, but I still couldn't help it," Wai swallowed, thinking of that night at the food truck. "And when I finally dared to believe it...that was when I realised that it wasn't for me. Pran was using me to make Pat jealous, or something like that."

Korn's eyes were full of sympathy. "That was crappy of him."

"Yeah, I guess," mumbled Wai. "To be fair to him though, if he had known how I felt, he wouldn't have done it. But he didn't...so yeah."

"Is this why you...did what you did?"

"Well, it definitely didn't help. When I heard Pran backstage, confirming that he and Pat were together...I was so hurt by everything that happened and really fucking jealous....I just snapped. You know what happened after that."

Korn was silent for a long moment. "It all makes sense now. Why you did that."

Wai shook his head. "It doesn't make what I did okay."

"No, it doesn't. Still, I'm sorry you got hurt, Wai."

The understanding and compassion, coming from Korn of all people, made Wai want to cry. He took a mouthful of noodles to stop himself.

"So, after everything that happened," he continued once he got himself back under control. "I don't feel like I deserve to confess to Pran. Not when he's so happy with Pat. Not after I betrayed him."

"Wai..." Korn's voice was gentle, and Wai couldn't help but marvel how they had gone from cursing each other out to talking in soft tones, filled with understanding and empathy.

"You can't be so hard on yourself," said Korn. "You already apologised to Pran and Pat. They already forgave you. You stopped Pat from going to prison, for fuck's sake. You have to stop beating yourself up and try to forgive yourself. Give yourself a chance."

Wai shook his head. "I don't know if I can do that."

"Don't you think Pran should understand you better? Don't you deserve that much?"

Wai looked up at Korn, a lump in his throat. "I'm scared, Korn. I'm trying to accept that I can never have Pran romantically...I'm scared if I tell him, I might lose him as a friend. Pran's a good guy; he might get worried about leading me on and keep his distance...I don't think I can take that."

He watched as Korn processed what he said before nodding slowly. "I guess I get that," he said. He slowly reached over the table and took Wai's hand. "Thank you for sharing this with me, Wai. I promise I won't tell anyone. I won't even bring this up anymore, unless you do first."

Wai's eyes suddenly felt hot, and he looked away.

"Thank you, Korn," he whispered.

):):)

It was late when Korn dropped Wai off at his dorm. He looked up at the building, thinking of his room, where his bed waited for him, cold and lonely.

He looked back at Korn, who was watching him curiously.

"D-do you want to come up?" Wai asked. "It's already pretty late, and I have some beer. You can stay the night."

Korn nodded. "Sure."

After the deeply personal talk earlier, they had nothing left to say. But the silence was comfortable as they sat on the floor side-by-side, drinking. Once the last bottle was placed into the bin, they were both pleasantly buzzed, but not drunk.

Wai looked over to Korn, wondering if he should offer his bed and take the couch, or ask Korn to share the bed. Instead, he shuffled closer over to Korn. The Engineering student silently wrapped an arm around Wai's shoulders and pulled him close. Wai closed his eyes as his head met Korn's shoulder, his whole body leaning against the other man.

And they stayed that way, drifting off to sleep together.

When Wai woke up the next day, Korn was still holding him, his head resting on top of Wai's.

And Wai felt warmer than he ever had in his life.

):):)

After that night, something changed between Wai and Korn. They were much closer, and their jokes had become less crude, and turned into something more like gentle teasing. Korn was touching him as freely as he did before, only now Wai was leaning into the touches.

Their friends seemed to have notice the deeper intimacy between them and had doubled down on the boyfriend jokes. Where before it had merely irritated Wai, now it raised a flutter in his heart.

Sometimes, Wai began to wonder if his feelings for Korn were changing into something more than friendly.

But such thoughts were quickly dismissed whenever his heart still twinged to see Pran and Pat together. Wai's feelings for Pran hadn't changed one bit. The difference was that now Korn seemed to be actively working to shield Wai from such displays. He'd pull Wai away to go see something random, or teased Pat relentlessly until the other Engineering student retaliated. He'd do his best to distract Wai from Pran and Pat displaying their love.

There was a time when Wai would have felt insulted at being treated so. Now though, he appreciated Korn's efforts, as futile as they were.

As the days passed, Korn became a constant and welcome presence in Wai's life. Sometimes Wai couldn't understand how they had ever brawled with each other; the idea of ever hurting Korn now an unpleasant and alien concept to him

):):)

As his shift wound to a close, Wai was still anxiously checking his phone.

Still nothing.

Pran and Pat had gone missing for days, and all attempts to reach them had failed. Auntie Dissaya had called him and asked if he had seen Pran, but he had no idea.

Sighing, Wai typed out yet another text.

Pran, where did you go? Why can't I get through to you? Is Pat with you? Are you guys okay? Please reply when you see this. Your mom's worried about you. So am I

He sent it and went to clock out. Once he had gotten changed, Wai exited and found Korn waiting for him like he always did. Not ready to leave yet, Wai went to the bar to get them both drinks.

"It's been a while since you actually drank here," commented P'Rai as he poured out the beers. He grinned teasingly. "Do I finally get to see you and your boyfriend be sweet together?"

Wai smiled, too accustomed to the comments to be bothered by it. "Korn and I are just friends, P."

"Well, I don't think that's all he wants to be," remarked Wai's boss, sliding the beers over to him. "Here you go. And don't even try to pay; this one's on the house."

Wai paused, his hands just about to reach into his wallet. "But-"

"You've been doing good work, so this round's free," said P'Rai firmly. "If you want more, your boyfriend can pay for it. Go on!"

Shaking his head with amusement, Wai thanked his boss and took the beers over to Korn. The other man was also looking a little worried, checking his phone frequently.

"Nothing from Pat?" Wai asked, setting the beers down in front of Korn, who shook his head.

"Nothing," confirmed Korn, taking a huge swig of beer. "Oh, I needed that." He turned his attention back to Wai. "How are you doing?"

Wai shrugged, trying to appear nonchalant. "I'm fine." Probably trying too hard, because Korn snorted skeptically. "Okay, I'm not fine. I'm worried about Pran. It's not like him to just disappear without telling anyone. Even his mother doesn’t know; she's panicking."

Korn nodded. "Yeah, Pat's mom called me too. It sucks I couldn't answer her."

"W-why do you think they didn't tell us?" Wai asked, his voice small. Korn seemed to sense Wai's distress and patted him on the back.

"It probably has nothing to do with us, you know?" said Korn. "They didn't say anything, so we can't jump to any conclusions. Let's just hope they're okay, and trust that they'll tell us if it's important."

Given Wai's own experience on that matter, he still had doubts. Nevertheless, Korn's words comforted him, as did his warm presence. And suddenly, Wai didn't want to give that up for the rest of the night.

"Korn, can I stay over tonight?" He asked. He flushed when Korn looked a little startled at the request. Usually, they would invite each other to sleep over at their respective places of their own volition, this was the first time either one of them had asked to actually stay over.

"I-I mean, it's fine if I can't...but-"

"Wai, of course you're welcome to stay over," said Korn, smiling warmly, and the sight of it made Wai's heart flutter...exactly the way Pran's smile did.

):):)

Wai wondered about the way his heart fluttered at Korn's smile earlier. Was he actually developing feelings for the other man? Somehow, the thought was surprising, yet it wasn't. Wai had grown comfortable with Korn in ways he never had with anyone else.

Not even Pran.

Were his feelings for Korn becoming something romantic? Or perhaps he was starting to love Korn platonically? Wai wasn't sure, but for some reason the uncertainty didn't stress him out. He decided to not obsess over it, and just take what he had with the other man as it was.

Beside him, Korn shifted in his sleep. Like so many times before, they were sharing the bed. It had become something completely normal to them. They were completely comfortable in each other's personal space. But right now, with Pran and Pat mysteriously disappearing without any word, Wai was feeling a little abandoned.

And a little needy.

He wanted Korn to hold him. It was another thing they sort of did regularly, but it always spontaneous, never conscious. Wai wondered if he should just snuggle up to Korn and hoped the other man would respond, or just ask him outright?

"Wai? Are you sleeping?"

Korn's sleepy voice startled him, and Wai found himself looking into the other man's eyes.

"Sorry, did I wake you?" Korn asked.

Wai shook his head. "No. I'm having trouble sleeping."

"Me too," said Korn. He sighed. "I guess I'm just really worried about Pat...and a little ticked off he didn't say anything to me."

"But what about what you said-?"

Korn chuckled. "I guess I'm a hypocrite. What I said was as much for me as it was for you."

Wai smiled a little at that. "At least we can wait together."

"Yeah."

Unconsciously, Wai shuffled over a little closer to Korn, just wanting to be nearer to him even if he can't hold-

"Wai? Could you hold me?"

Korn's voice was small, almost shy in the dark room.

"Are you sure, Korn?" Wai asked, just as shy.

"Yeah...being closer to you...makes me feel at peace."

Wai's face felt warm, and he was glad it was dark, so Korn couldn't see him blushing. Without a word, Wai snuggled up to Korn's side, wrapping his arms around the other man. Warmth bloomed in his chest when Korn's arms wrapped around him in return.

Slowly, Wai's worries and melancholy faded away, and sleep gradually took both as they laid together in bed, safe and warm in each other's arms.

):):)

At last, the whole story.

Wai, Korn and Ink sat and listened as Pran, Pat and Pa told them everything.

It was honestly quite the story, something fit for a lakorn. The family rivalry, the parents forcing the kids to compete from childhood. Pran falling in love with Pat and being forced to leave school for daring to befriend him, them meeting again years later and Pat realising he loved Pran too. Them daring to be together despite all the odds stacked against them. Their parents finding out. Pran and Pat fleeing to the beach side village and briefly living out their fantasy before coming back to face reality.

"Shit," Korn muttered. "So, what are you guys going to do now? Are you going to break up?"

Wai hated the way hope flickered in his heart at the thought. He felt incredibly selfish and was ashamed of himself. He was almost glad when Pran squashed the fleeting hope almost immediately.

"No," said Pran, holding Pat's hand. "Pat and I have gone through too much to give each other up now. We're staying together...but we need your help."

"Last time, we tried keeping it from everyone and it didn't turn out so well," said Pat, and Wai flushed when Pran's boyfriend's eyes flickered to him for a second. Korn's hand was suddenly on his knee, warm and reassuring, and Wai took comfort in the touch. He also saw that Pran had noticed and was eyeing them curiously.

"So," continued Pat. "We decided to keep a few people in the loop to help us out. People we trust. You guys."

"Of course," said Ink immediately. "We're here for you. Right guys?"

"Absolutely," agreed Korn as Wai nodded in agreement.

"So, you knew about them this whole time, Pa?" asked Ink.

"They never told me, but I caught them a few times. Honestly, you guys suck at hiding," said Pa.

"Hey!"

Laughter filled the room.

):):)

"Thanks for dropping me off, Wai," said Pran as he dismounted the bike.

"No problem," replied Wai, taking his helmet back. They were both outside Pran's house. Auntie Dissaya had insisted that Pran spend the next few weekends at home to help him recover emotionally, though truthfully, they suspected that she didn't really believe that her son had broken up with Pat.

"And thanks for agreeing to help us with this," said Pran sincerely.

Wai shook his head. "You don't need to thank me for that. I owe you guys, remember?"

Pran touched Wai on the shoulder, and it took all his willpower not to flinch at the touch. It was like brand burning through him, threatening to unlock the full depth of his feelings.

"Wai, you don't owe us anything," said Pran. "You fucked up, you made up for it, and you owned up to it. It's all good. Don't hold on to this anymore, okay?" He patted Wai on the back. "If you're going to get along with Pat, it should be because you want to. Not because you feel like you owe us, okay?"

Wai nodded slowly, though he didn't fully accept it. "Was it Pat this whole time?"

"What?"

"In school, I asked you if you were in love with someone? You never answered me. Was it Pat?"

Pran smiled. "You still remember that? Yes, it was Pat." He sighed. "He was the reason why I never accepted anyone's advances. I was trying to get over him...I guess I never did."

With those words coming from Pran, Wai accepted that his best friend would always just be that: his best friend. Pran would never love him romantically. Wai thought the acceptance would give him peace. Instead, it left him saddened, bitterly resigned to his fate.

But like he had for years, Wai hid it behind his mask.

"I'm glad it worked out for you," he said, his words sincere, even though it felt like his heart was bleeding. "You deserve to be together after everything you went through."

"Well, it didn't exactly work out," said Pran, chuckling. "We're conspiring to hide our relationship, remember? But thanks Wai. I'm glad you're on-board this time. I feel bad about leaving you in the dark last time-"

"Don't," said Wai earnestly. "Don't dwell on that. Let's just leave it at I fucked up, and we're all just trying to be better now."

Pran smiled, the dimples that Wai so adored appearing in his cheeks. "Deal." Pran paused before his smile turned into a cheeky grin. "Speaking of deals, what's the deal with you and Korn? You both seem even closer than before."

"We're just friends, Pran."

"Bullshit, Louis and Safe are just friends. Mo and Chang are just friends. You and Korn...no, there's something there, I'm sure of it!"

"Goodnight, Pran."

"Wai!"

Wai started his bike and rode off, leaving Pran behind laughing.

):):)

Time passed by quickly. Between helping Pran and Pat hide their relationship, hanging out with Korn, the countless meaningful conversations, Korn still trying to shield and distract Wai from Pran and Pat's love and just the everyday life of a university student, a year had passed.

And now they were having a small early celebration for Pran's birthday. His family wanted to go on a trip with him for his actual birthday, so the rest of them were celebrating early.

It was just Wai, Korn, Ink, Pa and Pat, singing 'Happy Birthday' as Pran blew out his candles.

"Thank you, guys," said Pran, beaming as they applauded and congratulated him.

"Happy birthday, P'Pran," said Pa, hugging him around the waist. "P'Ink and I got you this."

"It's a new Polaroid camera," said Ink, as Pa handed the gift over. "I know you like being able to arrange your pictures by hand, so this should come in handy."

"Wow, thanks guys!"

"I got you this," announced Korn, handing Pran a bottle of whiskey. "The guy who sold it to me assured me it's a good one."

Pran whistled as he studied the label. "Wow, you weren't kidding. Thanks, Korn. Now, I know you didn't buy this just for me, so why don't you get some glasses so we can share this?"

Korn grinned broadly. "You know me so well." He shot off to find the glasses.

"Happy birthday, Pran," said Wai softly, handing his gift over.

"Thanks, Wai," Pran smiled warmly, and Wai despaired as his heart fluttered helplessly at the sight. He watched as Pran unwrapped the gift. "Oh wow, Wai..."

It was an album filled with pictures and cards from their school friends. Not just from their school, but from Pran and Pat's too.

"I thought it would be nice if you had wishes from some of the guys from way back, and I asked them to share any pictures they had. Ink and Pa helped with the guys from your school."

Pran set the album down and hugged Wai. He closed his eyes, breathing in Pran's scent as he returned the hug. Wai's heart thundered in his chest as he fought down the desire to imagine that the hug was anything other than just a friendly one.

"Thank you, Wai," said Pran, stepping back. "It's a wonderful gift. I really appreciate it."

Wai smiled back, drowning in Pran's soft, soulful eyes like he always did-

"Baby, it's my turn."

And the moment was gone when Pran turned away to beam at Pat, who proudly gave his gift.

Wai had accepted that Pran and Pat belonged together. He had accepted that he and Pran would never be together. The knowledge helped dull the pain he felt when they both freely showcased their love. It helped soften the razor-sharp feeling in his heart to a soft ache.

Still, the aches hurt. And sometimes it got too much.

Like now.

Watching Pran and Pat lose themselves in each other eyes, retreating into their own little world, Wai turned away. Knowing he wouldn't be missed from this point onwards, Wai let himself out of the room and headed to the roof where he hoped the cool night air would help him gather himself.

The rooftop was deserted, and Wai leaned against the railing, watching the city lights twinkling. He sighed. He had tried so hard to move on from Pran over the last year. He had tried dating other people, only for all his attempts to fizzle out when they all inevitably realised that he wasn't really interested. Wai had even made an ill-advised attempt to pursue Pa before Ink had threatened him with a painful death with her eyes alone.

Despite all his attempts though, Wai still found himself yearning for Pran, no matter how hard he tried not to. It was frustrating for him.

"Hey, what are you doing up here?"

Wai smiled a little at the familiar sound of Korn's voice. Leave it to Korn to come looking for him while he was wallowing in his melancholy.

"I didn't think anyone would notice," Wai said.

"I always see you, Wai. You know that."

Wai nodded. "You do," he agreed.

Korn joined him at the railing, watching the night sky. The cold night wind blew across Wai's bare shoulders, and he shivered, regretting his decision to wear a singlet.

Without a word, Korn's arm wrapped around his shoulders, warm and welcome.

"Thanks," Wai said, feeling a little bit better. Korn hummed in acknowledgement and Wai leaned against him a little, taking comfort in the warmth. They stayed that way for a moment before Korn cleared his throat.

"Wai...I know I promised that I wouldn't bring this up unless you did first, but you know I've been watching this whole time. And I'm sorry, but I have to know: do you still have feelings for Pran?"

A sigh escaped Wai as he closed his eyes. Of course, Korn had noticed. He seemed to see Wai more clearly than anyone else ever had. It was what Wai found comforting about him.

It was what vexed Wai at times.

But he answered Korn truthfully. "Yes."

He felt Korn looking at him. "Still? After all this?'

"Yeah."

"Wai...what you're doing to yourself...it's not healthy."

There was a lump in Wai's throat. "I know that," he whispered.

"I know it's hard, but you have to try to let go of this. You're just making yourself miserable," Korn's arm tightened around him. "You deserve to be happy too, Wai."

"Do you think I'm not trying? I can't help it that I keep comparing the people I've been dating to Pran."

"You're just trying to replace him, that's why. It's not the same as trying to get over him. I'm sorry for saying this Wai, but how do you think Pran would feel to know that his happiness is making you miserable? That he's making you miserable?"

Wai's heart turned cold, as though squeezed by an icy hand.

"You wouldn't," he whispered, giving Korn a wounded look. The other man frowned for a second before his eyes widened as he realised what Wai was thinking.

"No! Of course not! I wouldn't do that. I won't tell Pran. Come on, you know me better than that."

Relief flooded Wai. "I'm sorry," he murmured. "For a second there, it sounded like you were threatening to tell."

"Dumbass," Korn said fondly, making Wai chuckle. "I wouldn't do that to you." He squeezed Wai's shoulders affectionately. "What I'm saying is that you shouldn't go out looking to replace Pran. You should be trying to find your own happiness. Someone you'll love because it's them. Someone who'll love you for you."

Wai closed his eyes again, wondering if he could ever do that. Beside him, Korn's voice had grown soft as he said the next fateful words.

"Maybe someone...like me, Wai."

Slowly, Wai's eyes opened, and he turned to face Korn.

Korn, who was looking at him with a most tender expression. Open, vulnerable, his eyes soft as he looked upon Wai's face.

Hopeful.

"What did you say?" whispered Wai, stunned.

Korn removed his arm from Wai's shoulders, taking his hands instead.

"Wai," said Korn, his voice so soft, yet it made Wai's heart thunder just like it had when Pran had hugged him. "I like you. Hell, I think I love you. You...you're amazing, don't you know that? In all the time I've known you, I've seen you at your worst, and I've gotten to see you at your best...and after you told me your whole story...it just made me respect you so damn much, you know?"

He reached up to gently touch Wai's cheek, and Wai didn't pull away. "Except for that curtain thing, you've been amazing in supporting Pran and Pat. Most people would have just stayed away or gotten so jealous they'd try to ruin things. Not you, you've been there for them even though it's been hurting you so much. I've seen how you keep smiling and supporting Pran...and damn it, Wai, you have no idea how beautiful that all makes you."

"But Wai-" Korn's voice broke a little. "-seeing you so sad...it's been killing me. I can't stand seeing you like this anymore. I...I want to make you smile. Not because I'm distracting you from Pran and Pat. Not because we're just friends. I want to make you happy. I want to see you truly smile, hear you really laugh. Because you deserve someone who cares about you, Wai. You deserve to be happy. Will you give me a chance? Will you let me try to be the one to make you happy?"

Wai stared into Korn's eyes, honest, hopeful and shining with love. No one had ever looked at him that way before, and it scared him.

Hadn't he known? Wai had known for some time, that Korn's feelings for him had been growing into something more. Yet, somehow, Wai had kept the truth from himself, telling everyone and himself that he and Korn were merely platonic in their relationship.

And now Korn had shattered that illusion, offering Wai his heart. Offering him a chance to make him happy.

The thing was, Korn had already been making Wai happy. No one had made him smile and laugh as much as Korn did. The times he had spent with the other man were the ones where Wai's heart ached the least about Pran. Sometimes, Wai didn't even think about Pran when he was with Korn.

Maybe...with more time, Wai might have even fallen in love with Korn.

But now, Korn had confessed his feelings right in the aftermath of Pran unknowingly devastating Wai's feelings, and the spectre of it hung heavy between them.

Because now Wai didn't know if he'd be accepting Korn's love because of Korn, or because of another desperate attempt to get over Pran. It would haunt all his subsequent interactions with Korn. Wai feared that he'd start to see Pran in everything Korn did.

Wai couldn't do that to Korn.

Korn deserved better than that.

"I-I can't, Korn," whispered Wai, his eyes hot and to his horror, he realised he was on the verge of tears.

"W-what? Why?" Korn whispered, sounding devastated.

"Because you deserve better than this," Wai said, a sob threatening to rip free from his throat. "You deserve someone who wants to be with you. Not someone who's still pining for something he could never have. You deserve better than me."

"But I want you," said Korn, trying to pull Wai closer. "P-please, Wai...I lo-"

"Don't say it," pleaded Wai. "Please don't say it again."

"I love you, Wai," Korn continued, inexorable, and the words were like a blow, forcing the tears to fall from Wai's eyes.

"You can't," he sobbed. "You shouldn't. Because I'll just see Pran no matter what. You don't deserve that. You deserve better than me, Korn."

Korn cupped Wai's face in his hands. Even through his tears, Wai could see that Korn was starting to cry too, but his expression was determined.

"What if I don't care?" whispered Korn, his voice fierce. "I'll help you get over him, Wai. Just give me a chance to do that. Let me do it. Please, I'm begging you."

Wai pried Korn's hands away. "You said it yourself," he whispered. "What I'm doing to myself isn't healthy. You're absolutely right. So, I can't let you do the same thing. It would be wrong of me to let you do this."

"But you'd let Pran do this to you?" Korn said softly, but he sounded angry now, and it made a little anger flare up in Wai too.

"Pran doesn't know that he's doing this to me!" cried Wai, his voice breaking as he tried to inject the anger into his words. Instead, he just sounded broken. "Do you think I could live with myself knowing that I'm doing the same thing to you? No, Korn. I'm not letting you do this. I care about you too much."

Korn grabbed Wai by the shoulders. "I don't care, Wai. Please. Let me-"

"No, Korn," Wai struggled to get away, but Korn seized him around the waist, trying to pull him closer. "P-please...d-don't do this, Korn. Let me go. Just let me go. Please, let me go!"

Wai punched him. It was a pathetic facsimile of all the punches he had thrown before, yet it stopped Korn in his tracks. He stared at Wai in shock, and Wai slowly reached to touch the spot he had punched. It wouldn't even leave a bruise, yet Wai knew it had wounded Korn more deeply than any other blow he had ever given the other man.

"I'm so sorry," Wai sobbed brokenly, and he fled the rooftop, leaving Korn behind.

):):)

The aftermath of the rooftop incident would haunt Wai for weeks to come. He had completely withdrawn from everyone, leaving his dorm only for classes and work. He mostly ignored all attempts to reach out to him, answering questions and texts with only the most necessary responses. Wai could see his friends growing concerned about him as he no longer hung out with them.

It was a good thing that he had also finally gotten over the trauma of the gun incident at work, because Korn had also stopped coming. At first that had led to some teasing by P'Rai and his colleagues about Korn and Wai having a spat, but whatever they saw on Wai's face had quickly made them stop. Luckily, he was still able to work well, though he had gotten some comments about him being much colder.

Pran also tried to reach out to him. Wai appreciated that his best friend wasn't too absorbed in Pat to notice him this time around, but Wai had gently, but firmly rebuffed all attempts to get him to talk. He had mostly used the upcoming exams as an excuse, because Wai did have a scholarship to maintain, though he was already one of the better-performing students in class.

And Korn...Korn hadn't tried to reach out to him. Wai told himself it was for the best. But he missed him. Wai missed Korn so much that the pain of the other man's absence was almost physical. But Korn's confession, and the feelings he had for Wai was too frightening to face. So, Wai stayed away, even as his heart ached for Korn.

After the exams were over, Pran had invited Wai for dinner at his parents' house, but Wai had refused, using work as an excuse even though P'Rai had given him the week off.

So it was, Wai found himself sitting alone on his couch in the dark, wallowing in his misery. Missing Korn, pining for Pran and hating himself. He thought of drinking, but he was out of beer and couldn't be bothered to go out and get some.

How long Wai stayed that way, he didn't know. But a sudden knock on the door broke through his melancholy.

"Go away!" Wai called out without thinking.

"So, you lied to me about having work," Pran's voice replied from the other side of the door. "I couldn't believe it when I called P'Rai to ask. Open the door, Wai. My mom packed some food for you."

Wai's stomach growled at the thought of Auntie Dissaya's cooking. "Just leave it by the door, I'll get it later."

"I'm not some delivery guy, Wai!" Pran retorted indignantly. "Open the door, we need to talk!"

"No, we don't. Go away."

"Last warning, Wai. Open the door."

"Or else what?"

There was a click, and Wai's door swung open.

"You gave me a copy of your key, idiot," said Pran as he entered, switching on the light. Pat followed him in.

"This is trespassing," whined Wai and Pran rolled his eyes before concern filled his face.

"You don't look good, Wai. What's going on with you?"

"Nothing."

"Bullshit."

"Rude."

Pran sighed. "Look, how about you just eat first? We can talk after that."

"I'm not hungry and I don't want to talk."

Pran looked like he was about to leap over the couch and strangle Wai. He took a deep breath to calm down.

"Alright, you're not hungry," Pran said slowly. "I'm going to go put this food in the fridge and when I come back, we're going to talk, whether you like it or not."

"I'd like to see you try," Wai said with a weak sneer.

Pran growled. "Don't test me."

Wai listened as Pran stalked off to the kitchen. Another set of heavier footsteps moved until they stopped just behind Wai.

"You know," Pat's voice was amused. "I'm glad to see you have a gift for pissing Pran off too. Gives us something in common."

If only Pat knew.

"Why are you here? Did you have dinner with Pran's family too?"

Pat scoffed. "As if. I just picked him up after he was done. He was worried about you and wanted to check up on you."

Wai felt ashamed of himself.

"Look Wai, I know we're not exactly close," Pat sighed. "But Pran's right, you know? You don't look well. And...I guess I'm worried too. You're special to Pran, and that's enough for me to care about you too."

Wai didn't know how to respond to that. "I...thanks for that, Pat. But really, I'm fine."

"To quote Pran: 'bullshit'."

They both shared a small laugh over that before awkward silence descended between them.

"Is it Korn?" Pat asked slowly.

Wai immediately tensed up.

"He's not doing well too," Pat continued. "He's been a wreck since Pran's birthday. At first, I thought you guys had broken up-"

"We can't break up if we were never together, Pat."

"Yeah, he told me that," Pat paused. "So, you guys were never a couple? We were all so sure-"

"Korn and I were just really close. That's all."

"Well, it definitely seems to be something more. Did you guys get into a fight then? Is that why you guys haven't been around each other lately?"

"Something like that," muttered Wai, inwardly worrying about Korn.

"Maybe you guys should make up, then? You're both not handling...whatever this is, very well. Seems to me like you need each other."

"It's not so simple, Pat."

"Why not-?"

But they were both interrupted by Pran storming out of the kitchen. His eyes were blazing, and Wai immediately knew he couldn't snark his way out of whatever it was that had pissed Pran off.

"What the hell is wrong with you, Wai?" Pran thundered.

"W-what? What did I do?"

"Your fridge is fucking empty," Pran continued, stalking toward Wai. "I checked your cupboards too: fucking empty. You don't have a single scrap of food in here!"

Pran grabbed Wai and lifted his shirt. He proceeded to touch Wai's body, running his hand up and down Wai's stomach and ribs, making him cry out in panic.

"Pran! Stop! What are you doing?!" The touch sent waves of fire through his body, and he struggled to make Pran stop. Pran did, standing back and staring at Wai with both anger and worry.

"When was the last time you ate, Wai?"

Wai opened his mouth to answer but then closed it again when he realised he couldn't give Pran a definitive answer. Between the exams, the mess with Korn, pining for Pran, Wai barely remembered anything about food. He could vaguely recall some biscuits here and there, but nothing really filling. Now that he thought about it, Wai realised he was feeling physically weak.

"Has it been that long?!" Pran exclaimed furiously. "Why the fuck are you doing this to yourself, Wai?! What is wrong with you?!" He turned to Pat. "Pat, could you please go serve the food out? We're making this idiot eat, right now."

"Y-yeah," Pat hurried to obey, looking all too glad to get away from a furious Pran, who turned his attention back to Wai.

"Wai," Pran's voice was gentler now. "Please...talk to me."

"It's nothing," mumbled Wai.

"It's not nothing. You're freaking me out here," Pran sighed. "Should I call your mom? Maybe she can talk some sense into you..."

"That's low, Pran," Wai protested, giving Pran a wounded look, but his best friend was unmoved.

"No. You hiding away and killing yourself is low," said Pran furiously. "Is it...is it Korn? Did something happen with you guys?"

And Wai snapped.

"Why does everyone assume it has something to do with Korn?! We aren't boyfriends! We just care a lot about each other, but that doesn't mean anything has to happen between us to get us all depressed! It's like nothing can happen to me unless Korn's involved! I'm more than just my friend you know-"

Wai's rant came to an abrupt halt when Pran reached out to wipe the tears streaming down his face. Pat had re-entered the room and was watching with wide eyes.

"So, it is Korn," said Pran gently, and Wai broke down in his arms, sobbing.

"I miss him," sobbed Wai. "I miss him so damn much."

Pran rubbed Wai's back gently. "What happened? Did you guys fight?"

"Worse."

"What could be worse?"

"He..." Wai choked on his tears, trying to get the words out. "Korn said he loved me. He wanted us to be together."

"Oh, Wai," sighed Pran. "Isn't that wonderful? We all could see that he did, you know?"

"I rejected him."

"Why?" it was Pat asking this time. "Don't you love him too? We were all so sure-"

"Yes, I love him," sobbed Wai. "That's why I rejected him."

"Wai, you're not making any sense-"

Wai knew he was venturing into dangerous territory but was unable to bring himself to care anymore. "Because I'm in love with someone else!"

Silence hung heavy in the room. And Wai was acutely aware that this was the closest he had ever come to confessing to Pran and was already rallying to protect himself and their friendship.

"W-who?" asked Pran softly.

"I-is it Pa?" Pat guessed.

"It doesn't matter who," croaked Wai, sniffling into Pran's shoulder, realising the irony of it all. "What matters is that I can never be with that person. And it won't be fair to Korn if I'm still not over hi- I mean, that person."

"Maybe you should give it a try with Korn," suggested Pran. "Maybe he's exactly what you need."

Pat moved closer, putting a hand on Wai's back. "Yeah, meeting someone else is usually the best way to get over unrequited love."

"I've been trying...I've been trying to meet other people, but it never worked out..."

"Korn's not other people, Wai," Pran pointed out gently.

"Exactly."

"What do you mean by that?"

"Korn actually loves me...and I love him...which is why I can’t just be with him. I don't want to use him to get over someone else. I want to be with him because I want to, and I can't be sure of that while I'm still in love with this other person..."

Silence followed Wai's words.

"I guess...that makes sense," said Pran, sighing. "I don't agree with it, but I get where you're coming from, Wai. But in any case-" Pran pushed Wai back and lifted his face. "-starving yourself isn't going to help anyone. You must take better care of yourself, please?"

Wai wiped his tears. "Okay."

"Good, come and eat. It'll make you feel a little better."

):):)

"Hey there, pretty boy, can I get you anything?"

Wai looked up at the older man smiling down at him. Even through the dim lighting of the bar, Wai could see he was very attractive.

"Maybe you can," said Wai, inviting him to sit beside him.

"I'm Earth," said the man, settling down on the stool beside him.

"Wai."

"That's a nice name."

After his meltdown in front of Pran and Pat, Wai realised that all his repressed feelings were getting dangerously close to slipping out. He might even accidentally confess to Pran if he didn't do something about it.

So, Wai had decided to forego the romance. What he needed as Louis had once crudely put it, was to fuck it out.

And Earth looked like he really wanted to fuck him out.

That was good enough for Wai. He had gone to a bar far away from all his usual spots to avoid meeting people he knew, dressed a little sexier than his usual wont to catch some eyes.

From the way Earth eyed the glimpses of his bare chest through his shirt, it was working too.

Wai flirted with the older man, putting on a shy, innocent facade that seemed to excite Earth even more. He tried not to flinch when Earth reached up, slipping his hands under Wai's shirt to gently caress his well-defined pecs.

"You are a sexy one," Earth purred. "I'd love to find out just how sexy you can be..."

"Who's stopping you, P?" Wai asked, his voice demur but his eyes bold.

A fire lit up in Earth's eyes. "Want to come to my place?" he asked, his voice heated.

"Why go anywhere?" Wai asked, jerking his head towards the bathroom. "We can have fun a lot more quickly over there."

"Kinky little minx, aren't you?" growled Earth. "Why don't you let me have a taste first...?"

The older man leaned in, and Wai closed his eyes, trying not to flinch away, waiting. As Earth's lips gently brushed against his, Wai imagined that it was Pran's instead...or Korn's...

"Get away from him."

Wai's eyes shot open. He turned in shock to see that it was, indeed, Korn standing in front of him, flushed and furious.

"Who the hell are you?!" demanded Earth.

"I'm his boyfriend," growled Korn, glaring at Wai. "You are in so much trouble."

Wai had been about to deny the label but quailed under Korn's furious gaze.

"Shit, why didn't you say you were already taken?" Earth backed off. "I don't mess with people's boyfriends. Jeez..."

Without another word, Korn grabbed Wai by the hand and pulled him out of the bar, even as Wai struggled.

"Korn, let go-"

"We're leaving."

"But-"

"I'm taking you home."

"I don't want to go home-"

"Were you going to have sex with that guy?!"

"Korn, you're hurting me!"

Korn immediately released Wai's hand, which was already reddening from how tightly it had been gripped earlier. Wai cradled it in his other hand, watching as Korn looked contrite over what he had done, but still angry. They were both standing outside the bar, out on the empty street.

"I'm sorry," said Korn. "But...what the fuck were you thinking?!"

Wai shrank before Korn's anger.

"I...I confessed my feelings for you," continued Korn furiously. "And you rejected me because you said you were scared that you'd just be using me to get over Pran! So your solution is to let some random asshole fuck you?! You're a scholarship student, Wai! You're supposed to be fucking smart!"

"No feelings involved!" snapped Wai. "It would have just been physical. To help me forget!"

"That is the stupidest thing you've ever said!" snarled Korn. "Letting some random fucker who doesn't give a shit use you is right up there in the 'stupidest ideas' column! We're going home!"

"You can't make me!"

"I can and I will. If you go back into that bar, I'm going to call Pran and tell him about your plans to become a fucking whore!"

That hurt, and all the more so because it wasn't far off the mark. Wai felt his eyes prickling with unshed tears.

"That's blackmail," he whispered. "That's low."

Hearing the hurt in Wai's voice, Korn's tone became gentler. "There's nothing I wouldn't do to protect you, Wai. Please, come home."

Wai gave in and watched as Korn hailed a taxi. He allowed the other man to shepherd him into it, sitting beside him in sullen silence. He resisted only briefly when Korn took his hurting hand, before giving in, allowing him to massage it.

"I'm not a whore," muttered Wai, wincing a little as Korn's strong fingers pressed into his hands.

"I know," agreed Korn. "That's why I couldn't let you act like one."

"How did you know I was here?"

Korn hesitated. "Pat told me about what happened. He said that Pran was worried you might try to do something stupid. So, I came by to check on you...and I caught you just as you were leaving. I followed you."

Wai stared at Korn. The other man looked very haggard, like he hadn't gotten much rest. His hair wasn't tied up in his usual ponytail, hanging loose and lank around his face and shoulders, leaving him looking like an emaciated corpse. Pat had been right, Korn looked like the days since the rooftop incident have been just as hard on him as they have been for Wai.

"You look terrible," said Wai. Korn chuckled softly, giving Wai a bleak look.

"Not as terrible as I felt when I found out you told Pran and Pat that you loved me too."

Wai didn't know what to say to that, and the rest of the taxi ride passed in silence.

):):)

Wai looked up at the apartment building where the taxi dropped them off. It was Korn's dorm, not his.

"I thought you were taking me home?"

"My home," said Korn. "I don't trust you not to do anything stupid right now, and it's easier for me to keep an eye on you here." He held out his hand. "Come on."

Korn's apartment was the same as it has been the last time Wai had been there, but there was something different. It was subtle, but it hung heavy in the air, leaving him tense, almost nervous. It radiated off in waves from Korn, who was staring at him with frightening intensity.

"What?" Wai asked, almost scared. At the sound of his voice, Korn stirred, blinking as though he was coming out from deep thoughts.

"You said you love me," said Korn softly. "And I love you. So, let's just be together, Wai-"

"I told you, Korn. It wouldn't be fair to you-"

"You think it would be fair for me to watch you sleep around with random strangers?!" Korn almost shouted, taking a step towards Wai, who stepped back in alarm. "How do you think I'd feel watching you give yourself up to people who don't know how wonderful you are?!" Another step forward for Korn, another step back for Wai. "People who just want to use you. Who don't give a shit about you?" Another step forward, another step back. "People who have never seen your pain. People who don't know just how strong you are? Damn it, Wai! Tell me, would it be fair to me to have to see all that?!"

Wai's back met the wall, and Korn's hands shot out, bracketing him up against it, trapping him. There was a manic blaze in Korn's eyes as he looked at Wai.

"Tell me, Wai. Would it be fair for me?" Korn whispered, but the intensity in his gaze made Wai tremble.

"Korn...you're scaring me."

"You know you have nothing to fear from me," said Korn softly. "But I'm so scared for you, Wai. I'm so scared you're going hurt yourself with all this pain over Pran. So please, let me help take away your pain."

"But...Korn..."

"If you're going to go down this path," continued Korn. "At least do it with someone who gives a damn about you. Someone who cares about you." He leaned in; his face so close to Wai's. "Someone... like me."

And Korn kissed Wai. It was urgent, hungry and desperate, without a single ounce of tenderness. It was filled with repressed emotions, making Wai realised that Korn's feelings had been boiling under the surface for a long time and had finally found the outlet it so craved.

When Korn's tongue forced its way into his mouth, Wai whimpered, his hands on Korn's chest, trying to push him off, or merely trying to steady himself. All Wai could focus on was how good it felt, yet how wrong it was. Like he was betraying both Korn and himself for allowing this to happen.

"Korn, stop!" Wai pushed him back. "W-we can't."

"We can," said Korn heatedly. "You were going to do this with someone else. Just do it with me."

"Wait, no-"

But Korn was already wrestling Wai into the bedroom, shoving Wai down onto the bed. Wai looked up at Korn, both aroused and terrified as the other man ripped off his own shirt and stripping off his pants, leaving him in his boxers. Wai could see it straining with Korn's erection.

Korn reached down to undo the buttons of Wai's shirt.

"Please..." pleaded Wai. "Please don't do this."

Korn halted. Hands inches away from Wai's shirt.

"You could stop me, if you want," whispered Korn. "You're strong enough to do that, you know?"

Wai knew he could. He and Korn were almost similar in physical strength, the Engineering student perhaps just a shade stronger. Wai knew if he was determined enough, he could have easily stopped Korn from proceeding. But it wasn't a question of physical strength. Wai could only see the shocked look on Korn's face when he had been punched on the rooftop. Wai knew he could never bring himself to hurt Korn again, even half-heartedly.

And a part of him did want Korn to do this to him, but the part of him that deeply cared for the other man, the part that was still in love with Pran, kept screaming that this was all wrong.

That they would both end up getting hurt if this went any further.

Taking Wai's silence as permission, Korn slowly peeled off Wai's shirt, exposing his pale skin before peeling off his pants, baring Wai's well-toned legs and leaving him in nothing but his underwear.

Which was bulging with Wai's own arousal.

Wai's breath hitched when Korn's fingers hooked just under his boxers, preparing to pull it off. But he didn't. Korn was staring at Wai, an inscrutable expression on his face.

"Wai," said Korn softly. "If you don't want this, tell me. And I'll stop. I swear I will. Just tell me to stop."

He was going to. Wai was going to tell him to stop, but under Korn's desperate gaze, he faltered. Instead, Wai gave a small nod.

And Korn pulled off his underwear, leaving Wai completely bare and vulnerable.

"You're beautiful," Korn whispered. "So beautiful." He captured Wai's lips in another heated kiss, plundering his mouth with his tongue. And though he wanted to, Wai resisted from melting under Korn, still feeling like what they were doing was wrong.

Korn drew back and pulled off his own boxers, revealing just how fierce his desire for Wai was burning. Wai watched with wide eyes as Korn retrieved a bottle of lubricant from the bedside table. Korn position himself between Wai's legs, pausing as he stared down at him, making Wai tremble.

"Wai," said Korn softly. "If you want me to stop, now's the time. Tell me now. Because once I get started, I don't think I can stop. So please, tell me now."

He could see Korn's honesty warring with his raw desire for Wai. And Wai knew Korn would indeed stop if Wai asked him. But Wai could see Korn trembling with need, need that Wai himself was trembling for, despite his trepidation. And Wai knew he couldn't say no to Korn, but he knew the other man wouldn't continue without his explicit permission.

And Wai, so lost in his own despair, gave in.

"Do it," whispered Wai. "Take me, Korn."

Korn's eyes were wide with disbelief. "Y-you're sure?"

"Yes."

Korn descended on Wai like hungry beast, capturing Wai's mouth in yet another heated kiss. And Wai surrendered himself to Korn, letting the other man take whatever he wanted.

"I'll make you forget about...him," Korn whispered between kisses. "I'll make you happy, Wai. I promise."

And Wai tried his best, he tried his best to give all of himself to Korn. But to his despair, everything he had feared came true. As Korn took him, moaning Wai's name, the desire-fueled hoarseness of his voice turned into a softer, melodious tone. The rough touches of Korn's hands turned into long, slender fingers, delicately dancing across Wai's skin. The hot, burning kisses became tender, loving ones. Instead of Korn's desire-filled face, Wai saw a beautiful smile, with dimpling cheeks. And instead of the burning gaze coming from dark eyes under a pair of fierce eyebrows, Wai saw soft, brown eyes, soulful and penetrating him to his core.

Korn finished with a cry, and stayed on top of Wai, still sheathed within him, trembling.

"Fuck," whispered Korn, his voice cracking. Wai could hear the tears behind them. "I-I couldn't do it, could I? I couldn't make you forget..."

Wai turned away, his own tears streaming down his face. "I told you, Korn...it's no use. I'm too fucked up."

In the moment they had both climaxed, Korn had thrown his head back, crying out Wai's name. But Wai, in that same climactic moment, had cried out Pran's.

Not Korn's.

"You should forget about me, Korn," sobbed Wai softly. "Find someone who'll appreciate you. Someone who's not a lost cause."

"I don't care," said Korn heatedly. "I want you. I'll win you over, somehow. You can pretend I'm Pran until then-"

"Korn, that's fucked up-"

"I don't care, Wai," whispered Korn fiercely. "I love you, and you love me too. There's hope for us. You're just too hung up on Pran now. It's just going to take time. I'm not giving up on you."

Korn pulled out and laid down beside Wai, holding him.

"Use me," whispered Korn. "Pretend I'm Pran. One day it's going to be me you think of, I promise.

Wai started crying in earnest. "Korn...don't...don't do this to yourself."

"I don't care, Wai," whispered Korn, kissing him on the temple. "I don't care. One day, it's going to be me." His arms tightened around Wai, warm and comforting.

But no longer welcome.

"I love you, Wai," whispered Korn.

And Wai quietly cried himself to sleep, hating himself for pretending that it was Pran that was holding him, not Korn. He was truly a lost cause.

But perhaps, Wai told himself before sleep took him, this was all he truly deserved.