Chapter Text
"Caring is not an advantage Sherlock"
This statement keep repeating itself in his head as he sat looking at his guest.
He couldn't help but care even though he knew and was taught better.
There on the chair opposite him was the object of his affection. He was there sitting in his living room composed, elegant and as breathtaking as he has always been unaware of the damage he was causing to his host.
He has loved him for as long as he could remember and now it was as if his feeling were intensified.
He looks at him again memorizing everything about him like he has done a lot in the past. The way he walk, sat, talked and the sound of his voice. He was currently talking but Sherlock could not hear what he was saying buried in his thoughts.
He had tried so hard to bury these feelings in the past failing so tragically. He has now come to terms with his feelings and the fact that there were going nowhere, but at times like this, he wishes he had listened to his brother when he said caring isn't an advantage.
"All lives end. All hearts are broken. Caring is not an advantage Sherlock." He heard his brother's voice in his head reminding him just how much caring sucked.
"Sherlock, are you even listening?" He was pullout of his thoughts by the question.
"Hmmm, you were saying?"
"If you are not interested in what I have to say, Sherlock, I should leave."
That was the last thing he wanted but couldn't help himself with the word that he uttered next.
"Then leave," he said angrily.
He didn't miss the hint of surprise on his face but he continued either way.
"What you have to say is obviously boring me, that is why I keep getting lost in my thoughts. So it's obvious I don't want to hear it." He added
"I will take my leave then."
He watched him stand up, adjust his clothing, pick up his coat and put it on.
"Tell him to stay" his mind cried at him but all he does is watch him take his umbrella and walked towards the door.
"All I wanted to do was fix our relationship sher." He heard him whisper but he says nothing.
"Goodbye brother mine." He added
The moment Mycroft walked out the door, it was as if he was stabbed in the heart. It hurt so much he wanted to cry.
So he stood up and walked straight to his room to cry his eyes out without anyone walking in on him and questioning him.
"Why can't I just be nice to him." He whispered to himself.
"All I do is push him away."
He stayed in his room all day crying till he was exhausted and slept off.