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"I've always wanted to do this," I whispered in his mouth. My drunk mind couldn't think of anything other than getting lost in him.
"I usually control myself when we're hanging out, but every time we drink together..." I inhale deeply, set on confessing everything I feel.
"I'd imagine crawling in your lap and kissing the hell out of you, and sometimes, when I'm alone, I think of you and me making love." He took an audible gasp, but I continue. "I imagine what it feels like to be with you in physical ways. I imagine what it's like to be beneath you, over you, on you. I couldn't stop no matter how hard I try." I don't stop talking; words coming out my mouth like vomit.
"Bel-"
"And I like you." He went still. "I've liked you for a very long time but I hid it from everyone because our friendship matters to me the most, but not now. Now, I want to follow my emotions. Now, I want to kiss you and for you to kiss me back. I've waited years to be this close to you, so please," I inhaled, felt the tears prickling my eyes, "if you don't like this, push me away. Push me away anytime and I'll stop-leave you alone and never bring this up again."
Then I kissed him. I kissed him with all the longing, care, and love I had for him. I poured all my emotions into his mouth. I offered myself to him, but he sat still and never returned my passion. I almost sobbed with the agony of it all. Heartbroken and disappointed, I pulled away, ready to get up and leave him with my dignity intact when he snaked an arm around my waist and held me firm.
"Don't go," he said with a fierce conviction. I stopped, sat still upon his lap. His eyes boring onto mine like a predator watching its prey, and he looked undeniably sexy-he's never looked to determined. His lips are plump and wet. His grip around my waist is strong and tight. And at that moment, I knew, that if I didn't have him now, I'd regret it for the rest of my life.