Work Text:
When Jungkook chose to pursue his dreams, he was 13 years old. Jungkook was sad to leave his family and sad that he would not experience the affection of a parent. The affection of having siblings. Even though his family was anything but family. They did not feel like a loving family. His siblings were ok. He loved his siblings, but not his parents.
Jungkook is aware that his parents were praying to have a little baby girl, so they could dress her in pretty clothes. All the other things you would want in a daughter. They ended up with him.
Jungkook’s parents continued to take care of him. They kept a roof over his head, clothes on his back, and food to eat, but he did not get that much affection. His siblings had all the affections. He was just the unwanted child they had because it was too soon in pregnancy to abort. His parents made that information known throughout his life.
Jungkook thought that, since he did not have a parental figure in his life, his mind was subconsciously attaching itself to the closest one he had. This is where Kim Seokjin arrived. He is everything that you can have in a parent.
Jin is loving and caring for the ones around him. He knew when to be playful and serious in certain situations. Jin is the one who taught Jungkook how to be respectful to other people around him, along with his other hyungs.
He taught Jungkook to be confident about who he was and all other things that a parent should do for the child.
Jin makes food for the group when they are hungry; he nurses them back to health when sick and vice versa. Jin is, unconsciously, the mother figure to the entire group of Bangtan, but to Jungkook most of all. Jungkook did not have a parental figure until he met Seokjin.
Jungkook loves Seokjin.
-
“Thanks mom”
This word slipped. Mom.
The entire room is silent. Everyone’s eyes widened in shock. Jungkook held his breath. He did not really mean to say mom. It just happened. Every second, the room became quieter, and Jungkook’s stomach was going lower and lower. He had butterflies in his stomach, which was not good.
Everyone should have seen this coming. With Jungkook leaving home at 13. This is expected to occur at some point. Everyone besides Jin knew it was going to happen at some point in time. The time being right now.
This moment.
Seokjin sucked in a breath. “Mom?” He said quietly under his breath.
With how quiet Seokjin’s voice was, it was a surprise that everyone heard it. Even though the room was deadly silent.
Jin’s voice sounded so quiet and with no emotion once so ever.
Why did Seokjin’s voice sound so emotionless?
“Jungkook, I am not your parent. You do know that, right?” Jin asked after a couple of minutes. Jungkook flinched slightly, and this did not go unnoticed by everyone. Seokjin sounded cold and distant.
Where was the caring hyung he grew up with? Jungkook had never seen this side of jin hyung before.
It terrified him.
‘I am not your parent’
Jungkook knows that! He knows that.
Jungkook took too long to answer, so Seokjin continued to do so.
“You have parents jungkook. I don’t want or need to be your parent.”
‘He basically said he doesn’t want you.’ Jungkook’s mind whispered to him.
Everyone can see the hurt flash in Jungkook’s eyes. The hurt was visible on Jungkook’s face. Unintentionally, the younger’s eyes started to tear up, his breathing became faster, and his heart was pounding.
“Y-yes. I know that you are not one of my parents. It just…slipped. Im sorry, ” Jungkook mumbled with a heavy heart, tilting his head down to the floor. His hands began to tremble, clenching his fists.
Jungkook’s nails dig into his palms, making little crescent moons on his skin. Jungkook could not feel the pain of his fingernails digging into his skin, resulting in blood dripping down his fingertips and into the white marble floor.
One of his hyungs gasped and seemed to pull Jungkook out of his trance-like state. The younger one eventually felt the pain of his fingernail’s digging into his palms.
“Jungkook! Are you ok?” a voice asked him. Jungkook looks up at the voice. This turned out to be Namjoon. All of the other hyung’s faces were pinched with worry, as he looked around the room. Jungkook turned his face to the eldest hyung in the room.
Jungkook’s heart sank even more. His jin-hyung’s face was avoided with emotion, with the exception of his eyes. His hyung’s eyes looked so caring with his emotionless face. That caring look in Seokjin’s eyes soon turned emotionless, as he realized Jungkook was looking at him.
Finally, Jungkook looked down at his injured hand. He sniffed his runny nose and realized the wetness below his eyes.
He was crying.
Oh god.
“I’m fine,” Jungkook replied. He started rubbing his leaking eyeballs. “I’m going to tend to my injured hand.” With that said, the youngest of the seven hurried out of the room, trying to avoid everyone’s gaze.
They did not see Jungkook the rest of the night.
-
In the bathroom farthest from everyone in the dorm, Jungkook broke down crying. He could no longer hold his tears.
Jungkook sat on the toilet before his legs decided to give out on the bathroom floor. If you were outside the door, you could have heard the full sobs that Jungkook let out. He could no longer hold his sobs.
The boy put the palms of his hands on his eyes in an attempt to stop himself from crying. A small amount of blood from his hands was smeared on his face.
‘No one wants you’
‘Why would you think Jin-hyung would want you? Your own parents don’t want you!’
The young boy felt his heart shattering at the painful statements his mind giving him. He was rejected by his only parental figure. There was a sudden stab of pain in his heart, causing him to cry out. Falling onto his knees in pain.
The pain became more severe as it traveled to the stomach. For a few seconds, the pain stopped at his stomach and then started to travel up his throat and out of his mouth. The hands that were once on his eyes, were now covering his mouth.
Jungkook began to cough harshly in the silent bathroom. Each cough became more painful as he felt that something had started to travel up his throat and out of his mouth.
Once the harsh coughs stopped, Jungkook held his hands out in front of him to see what he had just coughed out. The sight before him made his stomach drop with panic and horror.
An irises petal.
Jin-hyung’s favorite flower.
‘Why did this have to happen to him’
Jungkook thought to himself, as he pictured his emotionless hyung’s face in his mind.
Why did he have Hanahaki’s disease?
-
