Chapter Text
There's nothing on the telly. She's sung every song she knows by heart, including the entirety of several musicals. She's even finished her book. Mycroft played the good husband and left the office to bring her lunch two hours ago, only to return to work. Her stomach has started persistently gnawing on itself.
After five days of bedrest from the worst cold she's had in years, Dani is sick of these same four walls. Groaning, she rolls to the edge of the bed and pushes herself up. She plods into the bathroom to quickly wash her face. Glancing into Mycroft's hamper reveals the shirt from yesterday. Pleased and comforted, she snags it. She shimmies into some leggings and buttons the shirt on her way to the kitchen, quietly humming another round of songs.
Five minutes later, she's still staring into the pantry, the collar of Mycroft's shirt bunched up under her stuffy nose. She rocks on her heels, wondering if the coiling in her stomach is anxiety, hunger, or boredom. She doesn't want to stand still, even preoccupied as she is with finding food. Her eyes flit from one corner to another. She's craving something. She just isn't sure what. Sighing, she starts to reach for the biscuits when a murmur of a voice reaches her. Frowning, Dani leans into the hallway and follows the voice to Mycroft's study.
"Of course," he's saying, "Tuesday then." She hears the frustrated clack of the phone being hung up and the creak of the chair as he sits back. Opening the door, she peeks in. He doesn't look up from his laptop, but she takes his silence as permission to creep in. She perches on the edge of the desk, watching his eyes flit across the screen. He's wearing his glasses, the gold-rimmed ones she loves on him. His chin is propped in his palm with the fingers tapping impatiently on his upper lip. She loves this look on him, relaxed, focused, down to his rolled up shirt sleeves, his coif of hair falling into his eyes and his tie loosened.
After nearly four years together, she's still struck by how gorgeous he is. Her sister always wrinkles her nose when Dani says that. He's got the kind of looks one has to get used to. She can admit that he became more and more attractive as she grew to know him. Now that she knows him almost as well as she knows herself, she can tell he's ready to call it a day and unwind with a glass of wine. The thought of him sitting in his favorite armchair, book in one long-fingered hand and glass in the other, with his glasses slipping down his nose and that expressive mouth turned down in a focused frown, god. It makes her want... It makes her want. Smiling slowly, she crosses her legs and waits.
Loving someone like Myc means she has to be careful about this sort of thing, careful and patient. Thankfully, marriage has taught her both of these. She might be able to tempt him this time, if he's in the mood to be tempted and distracted.
With a sigh, Mycroft closes the laptop and leans back to look up at her. "Yes, love?"
"Are you busy with anything important?" She shoots for a soft, innocent tone. He gestures lazily to the lack of papers on his desk. He blinks slowly, his wrists draped over the arms of his chair, his eyes narrowed in that soft smile he gives her when she's charmed him somehow. He reaches up and tweaks the edge of the collar she's still clutching.
"This is dirty."
She shrugs. "Smells like you. I thought you left for the office."
His smile widens and he relaxes further into the chair, crossing one elegant leg over the other. "I thought I may as well work from home. What do I smell like, pray tell?"
Dani's momentarily distracted. Mycroft's relaxed air is the coiled energy of a jaguar, waiting, assured, unflappable. Paired with the way his voice deepens around the question, it makes her stomach do a little shimmy. Doing nothing but sitting there, he tempts her to rough him up, to laugh into his kisses and disengage that wonderful brain, just for a few minutes. Food, she decides, can wait. Reaching over to push his leg down, Dani slides into his lap, smiling when his hand comes up to support her back.
Shuffling closer, she places a kiss on his collarbone and nuzzles into his neck, relaxing under the weight of his hand and the familiarity of his warmth. "Like ink and stationary, the good kind." She mumbles against his skin. "And leather. And whatever's in your cologne."
"Bergamot. Seems a common fragrance women find appealing."
"Mhm. That one's my favorite." She leaves a string of kisses along his jaw, feeling his chest tense when she rests her hand just above his heart. The steady rhythm kicks up, interested but wary, as he is about most things. Catching his ear in a light nip, she smiles at the hitch of Mycroft's breath.
"Are you trying to distract me?" He asks.
Humming, she leans back and studies his tightly closed eyes, the flush rising in his cheeks. She curves her hand around his neck, meaning to pull him down to her but instead raking her nails through the curls at his nape. His breath catches again and she feels a shiver run down his back before his eyes open, the steely blue even brighter with the flush on his cheeks. His pupils flow into dazed black discs as he holds her gaze and the sight makes everything in her tighten in anticipation.
"Is it working?" She answers him, smiling.
His hand tightens on her back and he stands quickly. She clutches his shoulders, laughing as he lays her on the desk. Her heart kicks up and her blood rushes in her ears.
"You're determined to make sure I can never focus at this desk again, aren't you?" He says against her throat.
"My plan," Dani arches into him as his lips slide firmly down her neck, "maybe my plan was to drop by the office. See if I could distract you from your next meeting with the PM." He looks up from unbuttoning the shirt, grinning at the thought.
"I'll make sure Anthea never lets you in."
"Spoilsport." She mumbles as he leans in to kiss her. He laughs into her mouth and the feeling sends a shot of want and pure triumph through her core. It's not every day she can convince him to touch her like this. It's rare even, but he makes the effort. That it's so easy this time, well.. she's not one to question gifts. Reaching for the loosened knot of his tie, Dani lets him kiss her to distraction.
**
But as it happens, distraction has its consequences. She's missed two periods... She can do the math. One test and two little lines that cannot be, shouldn't be, but they're right in front of her. Two little lines and a morning of a miserable stomach settled by toast.
She's been involved in a high profile case, just managing to catch the killer with Sherlock's help last week. She was on antibiotics and sometimes it messes with the pill. That plus stress... she hadn't thought much of missing her last period and the one before was light, more like spotting. The absence of this one, the riot of her stomach, the unusual tenderness in her breasts... she puts one and two together and now these little lines are telling her that it still equals three. She should have noticed. She should have been more careful.
"Doctor." She whispers, scrambling out of the bathroom and rushing for her phone. She never went last time. She simply took a test and took its word. She was supposed to see them in a week when... when she lost everything. She won't make that same mistake this time. She can't.
Two days later, she's holed up in her mum's living room, sniffling through the last of her tears, her mum's hand gently brushing her curls.
"He won't want it." She mumbles, finally revealing the source of her grief. The baby, dear god, the baby, is implanted safely inside her uterus this time. Her doctor had looked at her, and she had jumped to the most terrifying conclusion: this one, like the last, would be an ectopic pregnancy. But her doctor smiled wide and her eyes gleamed and Dani realized that this is even more terrifying. A one in a million chance, with the pill thrown off by her medication and the egg somehow making it safely to its place without complication... it figures that a Holmes baby would find a way. She's terrified, ecstatic, hopeful.
God, she wants this baby.
Mycroft will be devastated.
"I didn't think you wanted kids." Her mum says.
Dani shakes her head. "I didn't think I could have any so I didn't want to want them."
"Mycroft may not be as angry as you think."
He has no interest in children, and with his work, he'll have no time for one. It's risky anyway. Her doctor wants her to take it easy from day one, no more running after Sherlock, no more venturing without a warrant into dangerous buildings. She'll go on bed rest early, but that's not a concern right now. This is her chance, her only chance. Mycroft won't want it.
She had arrived at her mum's just after dinnertime, her face streaked with tears, her hands clutching her belly as if she could feel the little bundle of life growing there. Her mum had pulled her in without a word and made tea, sitting her down and looking patiently at her hands.
"When did you find out?" She asked quietly.
"Today." Dani closed her eyes. "Mum, I don't know what to do."
It's after dark and Mycroft has already called, but all Dani could manage was to text him that she's with her mum. She can't bear to tell him. He'll be furious. But she has to go home eventually. Sitting up, she wipes her eyes and hugs her mum tightly.
"Thanks." She mumbles.
"Tell me what he says. I think I can take him."
Dani laughs and rubs her tired eyes, nodding. "I think he's a little scared of you so probably."
With tears in her eyes, her mum pulls her back in. "You always have a home here, Daniella. No matter what he decides. I know it's scary but this is what you want. Just..." she trails off, sighing.
"I won't run away this time." Dani says.
"Good. You can always come home."
"I know." Standing, Dani snags her coat and heads for the door, knowing if she looks back she won't leave. She has to tell Mycroft now or she'll never get it out before he realizes on his own.
Xerxes' bark echoes in the front hall, and he greets her with his usual exuberance but settles as he senses her unease. He follows her upstairs and to the bedroom, his nails clicking on the floor. She absently remembers that he's due for the groomer.
"Oh my god, you'd be so nice to my baby girl, wouldn't you?" She whispers, smiling before her words catch up with her. She blinks and straightens, horrified that she's already decided she wants a girl. She walks woodenly up the steps, closes the bedroom door and takes a deep breath. Mycroft looks up from his book, his brows furrowing. He sits up and sets his book and glasses aside.
"What happened?" He holds a hand out to her. Taking it, Dani sits on the edge of the bed and holds it in her lap. She takes a slow breath, counts to three. She has to say it.
"I... I went to the doctor. I was sick two days ago... threw up. This morning too."
"You didn't say." He shifts closer. "Daniella."
She looks up at him, feeling tears coming on again. "I'm sorry." She chokes. "I'm sorry. Oh my god, I don't know. I don't-"
He tugs her in quickly, wrapping her in his arms and tucking her head under his chin, shushing her. "Just tell me what it is. It's alright, we'll work through it. Just tell-"
"I'm pregnant." She blurts out, cringing, wishing she had found a better way to shatter every plan he had for the future. He tenses under her, his breath catching and holding. "I'm so sorry." She says.
"September." He says. The way it's always worked for them, at least it's easy to know when. She nods. He sighs heavily and settles back against the headboard. "Okay."
"Okay?" Leaning away, Dani studies his face. He's frowning, his brows pulled up in concern.
"Is it healthy? Are you safe?"
"What?"
He touches her cheek, his eyes flicking over her, checking her. "Is it safe, Daniella? To keep it?"
"You want to?" She can barely think around her relief.
He shakes his head, but it's not a no. He isn't sure what he's thinking yet. "I don't want children. I cannot guarantee that I would be a good father. But you want this. Or you wouldn't be so devastated."
"But-"
"But nothing. If I cannot stomach the thought of being a father, then I will leave. You and the child would be taken care of. The house is yours. I'm the one with the problem." She doesn't have time to be outraged before he continues. "But if you're willing to give me the time to come to terms then I may be able to accept it. Is that acceptable?"
"What? You... you'd leave us?" She jolts up, shocked and hurt by his offer, disturbed by how quickly 'me' has become 'us.'
"I have no place in a family, my love."
"We are a family, you bastard!" She smacks his chest. "We're a family of two, but we're a family! You'd do anything for your brother and your parents! You're a wonderful son with doting parents, and you don't know how to be part of a family? Stop it!" Her fear slips aside in the face of her anger. He doesn't react.
"Do you want this baby?" He asks patiently.
"Yes!" She blinks, her shoulders sagging, her anger dissipating. "Yes. Oh my god..."
"Then keep it. All I'm asking for is time. Of which we do still have some of. Alright?"
It's outrageous, infuriating, impossible. She should have expected nothing less. Nodding slowly, Dani relents. "Okay."
He leans in and kisses her softly. "I love you." He says, smiling.
"I'm still angry with you."
"Negative emotions aren't good for the baby."
"Get away from me," she manages to laugh. "You're impossible."
"You married me anyway." He laughs against her lips and then nudges her away. "Go wash up and come to bed. Have you eaten?"
"Yes, yes."
Standing slowly, Dani feels the fear return full force. She looks down at Mycroft, biting her lip, wondering if she can do this. He squeezes her hand and nods.
"You'll be fine. And no matter what happens, I'll take care of you. Alright?"
She nods slowly. "Okay."