Chapter Text
It starts as a usual evening for the three of them—A-Yao sassing Mingjue throughout dinner, Xichen at first laughing at their mutual snarky teasing, inevitably taking A-Yao’s side, which all results in A-Yao on Xichen’s lap getting him so turned on he even disregards the dishes, deciding, so unlike himself, that it’s okay to clean them up the next day.
Mingjue would fuck A-Yao right there on the kitchen counter. Stuff him full of cock among the plates and the glasses, breadcrumbs and cutlery, so A-Yao has to be careful not to thrash about lest he break Xichen’s precious china. Maybe Mingjue would even use anything edible suitable enough as lube, take that little twink down a peg or two, mess him up a bit. But he can see Xichen starting to fuss silently about the post-dinner mess.
Mingjue appreciates him relaxing his clean-up rule for once, and doesn’t want him stressed during what should be mindless filthy fun. He knows those damned dishes would annoy Xichen right out of his mind if he had to look at them, despite having said it was okay to just leave it all until morning.
So Mingjue tactically suggests they move somewhere more comfortable. A-Yao, despite being horny to be fucked wherever whenever, is a clever little thing—aware of Xichen’s pedantry, and picks up on Mingjue’s cue right away. They practically race each other to the bedroom.
As Xichen undresses slowly, Mingjue swiftly tugs at A-Yao’s clothes until their little pet is naked, giggling at Mingjue tossing the garments to the floor. Just as Xichen opens his mouth to presumably protest about the mess, Mingjue quickly walks up to him, shutting him up with a kiss. In fast and careless movements, Mingjue proceeds to undress Xichen as well, while A-Yao, naked and tiny, leans against Mingjue’s back, wrapping his arms around his waist and unbuckling his belt. Xichen’s clothes end up joining A-Yao’s and Mingjue’s in a pile on the floor.
It’s surprising how Mingjue and A-Yao can work together when pressed with a common interest. Without words, without even a glance, unspoken understanding strong between them, they push Xichen onto the bed, where A-Yao straddles him, squirming against Xichen’s hardening cock, then brings his head down to kiss him, blocking Xichen’s view of the offending mess.
Mingjue chuckles to himself, then gives A-Yao’s bottom a loud smack before going down on his knees and pressing his mouth to A-Yao’s warm tight hole.
A-Yao moans, arching his back, lifting his hips to offer himself better to Mingjue’s tongue-fucking, and Mingjue grabs his waist to hold him in place. He wraps the other hand around A-Yao’s cock, stroking up and down. When Mingjue presses his little slit with his thumb, A-Yao shudders, whimpering into Xichen’s kisses.
Mingjue would want to stroke Xichen as well, but with how enthusiastically A-Yao is writhing he needs one hand to keep him in place, and due to the delicious size difference, A-Yao’s and Xichen’s cocks are a little bit far apart and Mingjue can’t grasp them with one hand. He could if A-Yao moved lower, but then Xichen would have to do without the kisses—and without A-Yao’s dimples in his face, Xichen would again have a clear view of the clothes pile on the floor.
Mingjue lifts his head, abandoning A-Yao’s sweet hole, eliciting a loud whine of complaint.
He gives his pert asscheek a soft teasing bite, then lightly slaps his little hole.
“Don’t cry, baby,” he says. “I’ll eat you out. But you have to be still.”
“Mhm,” A-Yao moans what sounds like a petulant plea, shaking his ass.
“Wanna be a good boy for me, baby?” Mingjue asks. “Huh? Then I’ll eat you out and prep you for Xichen? Will you be still for me, baby?”
“Mhm,” A-Yao confirms, freezing his hips in place.
“Good boy,” Mingjue praises, tapping his ass appreciatively before he lowers his head and gives his little hole a loud peck.
With A-Yao still, both of Mingjue’s hands are free, so he wraps one around A-Yao’s cock and the other around Xichen’s.
“Right,” he says. “Be still for me now, baby, okay? You move and I’ll stop.”
Xichen is disciplined, always has been, succeeding at all times to make his body obey, and even now, even with Mingjue stroking him expertly, he doesn’t move even a bit, content to share kisses with A-Yao, letting Mingjue do what he wants. A-Yao, however, is a different story altogether. He tries though, Mingjue will give him that. But his toes curl, the muscles of his thighs tense, and he whines desperately into Xichen’s mouth as Mingjue licks the rim of his puckered entrance and squeezes his cock.
Mingjue finds his responsiveness endearing, especially seeing him try so hard to remain in position and control the shivers running through his delicate slender body. A-Yao sounds so needy, whimpering into Xichen’s kisses, like he’s wrecked already.
Mingjue teases the gentle folds of flesh with his tongue, the touch faint and light, then sinks his tongue deep inside, as if trying to devour A-Yao, rubbing his chin along his smooth skin. A-Yao’s moans rise about an octave but, apart from the slight twitching of his buttocks and thighs, he remains more or less still.
Surprisingly, it is Xichen who makes them stop. He sits up suddenly, A-Yao on top of him, and lines his cock up with A-Yao’s ass.
“I want to feel you open for me, poppet,” Xichen says. “No fingers, just my cock.”
A-Yao whimpers hearing that and Mingjue chuckles at both of their eagerness.
A-Yao is such a pliant plaything in Xichen’s hands, allowing himself to be moved and positioned in any way he likes. He’s incredibly bendy as well, and while Mingjue manhandles him too, there is always a lot more softness to A-Yao’s movements when Xichen does it. Or maybe it’s because of the way he looks at Xichen, meek and docile, while with Mingjue, his eyes spark with defiant brazen flames. So that even if he does allow himself to be overpowered, it feels like Mingjue has had to work for his submission, while to Xichen, it is always given freely.
Xichen lubes up his cock, but before he can begin to push inside, Mingjue grabs A-Yao’s underarms and lifts him, turning him around.
A-Yao wiggles slightly, his back now to Xichen’s chest, legs spread around Xichen’s thighs, Xichen holding his hips, sucking little bites into A-Yao’s shoulder, murmuring some loving praise. Mingjue caresses A-Yao’s face and he looks up, blinking. He smiles sweetly—no doubt still under the spell of Mingjue’s tongue up his ass.
“I wanna watch your face, baby,” Mingjue says. “Have you whine in my mouth, see you feel every inch.”
A-Yao’s smile grows wicked for a moment before he gasps loudly as Xichen lowers him onto his cock. He moans as he sinks down, shuddering while being breached, and Mingjue cups his face, sucking his lower lip, delighting in the helpless little sounds A-Yao spills into his mouth.
“Yeah, there you go, baby,” Mingje murmurs. “Take that cock.”
A-Yao grunts through the effort, sliding down Xichen’s length, slow and focused, as Xichen moans in bliss.
“A-Yao, my love,” Xichen whispers, “You’re so warm, poppet, so tight for me.”
“Er-ge,” A-Yao pleads, dragging out the syllables, “Please be gentle. It hurts.”
Mingjue chuckles at the vulnerable act that Xichen loves so much, watching with amusement how A-Yao pouts and whines.
“Oh my brave pet,” Xichen says, gripping A-Yao’s hips firmer, pulling him down determinedly, further onto his cock. “My small delicate kitten. You’re being so good for me, my love.”
A-Yao gives an exaggerated whimper, “Er-ge, you’re so big. Please slow down. It hurts so much.” But he’s rolling his hips, face flushed, eyes half-closed in pleasure.
“Of course, my love,” Xichen coos, bucking his hips, filling A-Yao to the brim in one hard thrust. “I would never hurt my most precious pet.”
A-Yao has already started eyeing Mingjue’s cock and, trapped between the two of them, he doesn’t need his hands for balance. With Xichen behind him, holding him by the hips and Mingjue kissing his face and playing with his nipples, there’s nowhere for him to fall, so he wraps his hands around Mingjue’s length and starts stroking.
“Ah, yes, baby, good boy,” Mingjue praises. “Wanna kiss it?”
A-Yao hums in agreement, salivating already, then lowers his head, placing his elbows down on the bed, and opens his mouth readily. It is warm and wet and soft, and Mingjue starts thrusting deeper, making A-Yao gag. But he loves it, filthy little thing, because he looks up at Mingjue, all cheeky and smiling, moaning like a slut, as spit dribbles down his chin. A-Yao’s mouth feels like heaven, but Mingjue can’t wait to ravage his little hole.
Xichen, however, likes to take his time. So Mingjue supposes he could come now, face-fucking A-Yao, and be ready for another round by the time Xichen’s done and A-Yao’s ass already worked so open and loose that Mingjue won’t have to hold anything back, he’ll go absolutely feral.
That’s a good plan , he thinks, speeding up, his cock bumping the back of A-Yao’s throat, until A-Yao pushes him away and out of the wet warm bliss of his mouth.
“Da-ge,” he pants. “Fuck me.”
Mingjue grins. “Yeah, baby, soon. When Xichen here is done, I’ll show you what real fucking’s like.”
“ Now , Da-ge,” A-Yao moans, bossy little thing. “I want it now.”
Xichen, having heard them, shifts, trying to slide out, but A-Yao doesn’t move from his lap, nor from his cock.
“No, Er-ge, please,” he says. “Stay. I want both of you.”
Xichen groans loudly to that, a visible shiver running down his body. “Poppet!” he exclaims, laughing, and bites A-Yao’s shoulder ferociously. “Such a naughty kitten.”
A-Yao smiles sheepishly, flashing his dimples, smug and playful.
“You really are a filthy little thing, aren’t you?” Mingjue says, climbing onto bed, between Xichen’s—and A-Yao’s—legs.
A-Yao is a size queen, Mingjue knows that well enough, and they have talked about this kind of scenario, where both him and Xichen would stuff his ass at once. Hell, they talked about it more often than discussing dinner plans or chores distribution. But Mingjue, despite all the other wonderful kinky shit they do, somehow always assumed double penetration was just a fantasy, sort of like fisting. Now, hit with the realisation that it is not a fantasy—perhaps fisting isn’t either?—but something that is going to happen within minutes, Mingjue’s mind short-circuits and his cock twitches, his heart swelling with love for their horny pet.
“My pretty little cock-slut,” Mingjue says affectionately, his fingers reaching between A-Yao’s legs, down to where Xichen is balls deep inside. “You hungry for more, baby? One cock not enough for you?”
A-Yao actually has the audacity to roll his eyes at Mingjue.
“You’re so predictable, Mingjue,” he says, sounding annoyed . Little shit. “I knew you were gonna say something like that, so unimaginative.”
Mingjue laughs, his finger feeling around A-Yao’s rim, caressing the tender flesh stretched so wide around Xichen’s cock, the delicate wrinkles of his puckered little hole spread smooth and flat around Xichen’s girth. The prospect of another cock, and Mingjue’s rather large one at that, fitting there seems entirely impossible. “Look at you, all mouthy. You’re asking for trouble, baby. And trouble’s what you’ll get. I’m gonna fuck you to a limp.”
A-Yao smiles his customer service smile, opening his mouth to spill more venom no doubt, when Xichen smacks his bottom sharply.
“Poppet,” Xichen warns. “Be good.”
Immediately, A-Yao reverts to his act. “Er-ge,” he pouts. “Da-ge was kinkshaming me.”
Mingjue laughs at that, and even Xichen gives a little snort.
“No, he wasn’t, my love,” Xichen says, smiling.
“See,” Mingjue teases, “Even Xichen knows.”
A-Yao pouts, and Mingjue leans down to kiss him. “Don’t whine, baby,” he whispers, his finger pressing firmer against A-Yao’s little hole. “That wasn’t me kinkshaming you. That was me kink praising you.”
Xichen hums in agreement. “Yes, my love,” he says. “Da-ge is a bit crude, but he loves how needy you are.”
A-Yao stops moving, and gives Mingjue an intrigued look, one eyebrow raised, amused smile dancing on his lips.
“Yeah,” Mingjue says, “I love that you’re so hungry for us, baby. That your little hole is so cock-starved.”
“You do?” A-Yao bats his eyelashes seductively.
“I do,” Mingjue kisses him again. “And I love that you’re being a little bitch about it.”
A-Yao laughs, and Mingjue choses that moment to slide his finger inside, right next to Xichen’s cock. A-Yao’s laughter turns into a gasp. He gulps, leaning slightly back, and looks down to where his little hole is struggling to take the extra girth. It does look pretty obscene. Mingjue’s cock twitches at the sight, and he wishes Xichen could also see it. Xichen can feel it though, because he moans, the muscles in his thighs trembling ever so slightly, and Mingjue can see that he is probably using all his restraint not to buck his hips upwards.
“Oh poppet,” Xichen groans. “You’re so tight. You’ll be so sore, my angel, taking both of us.”
Mingjue and A-Yao share a knowing smirk.
“It hurts so much, Er-ge,” A-Yao whines. “My little hole is too small for both of you. I will be absolutely ruined.”
Xichen groans. “Oh my poor precious pet. You will be utterly destroyed.”
Mingjue chuckles at their usual game, but when he starts pushing another finger in, it’s as tight as he’s ever felt A-Yao be. He tries to spread his fingers a little and A-Yao whimpers, sounding so weak and helpless that Mingjue worries it might be too much for him after all. But when he looks up at Mingjue, his expression is that of disarmed fondness, the one he usually only serves to Mingjue after he’s been well and thoroughly fucked. Mingjue melts a little, yet again overwhelmed with affection and gentleness for the precious little twink.
“Aw baby,” he teases, knowing full well A-Yao will likely bite his head off, “Look at you going all sweet on me, and I’ve only got two fingers inside you. Wait till I shove my cock in right next to Xichen, how sappy you’re gonna be then, huh?”
Sure enough, A-Yao snorts, immediately schooling his expression to that of annoyance. “Fuck you, Mingjue,” he huffs.
Mingjue laughs. “Like I said, baby,” he whispers, his other hand caressing A-Yao’s cheek. “Little bitch A-Yao is my favourite A-Yao.”
“In that case,” A-Yao says, moaning at how Mingjue’s fingers are spreading him even more, “I might turn it up a notch.”
“Do your worst, baby,” Mingjue says, then bites A-Yao’s lip, feeling it twist into a smile between his teeth. “Getting railed within an inch of your life, I expect nothing less from my snarky little cock-slut.”
A-Yao keeps on grinning even as Mingjue pushes the third finger in, but the pitch of his whine does get higher. Mingjue goes wild hearing it, imagining how sweetly A-Yao will whimper when it’s his cock, right next to Xichen’s, splitting him around that impossible stretch—Mingjue’s never been this horny. Even Xichen, always so composed in the face of A-Yao’s allure, can’t seem to restrain himself any longer, and groans like a mindless beast, rolling his hips upwards, his hands on A-Yao’s ass squeezing handfuls.
“Precious pet,” Xichen murmurs, slapping A-Yao’s bottom, “your poor little hole.”
Mingjue is a little unsure of the logistics of the act, but he keeps working his fingers in next to Xichen’s cock, and it seems to be going really well. For all three of them. A-Yao is moaning, his face flushed, eyes half-closed, already looking wrecked, as Xichen and Mingjue establish the rhythm that works for both of them inside that unbelievably tight heat. As lewd and filthy as it seems, Mingjue feels that it is at the same time somehow tender, intimate, that this is the closest the three of them have ever been. Then he chides himself a little for being a sap, giving A-Yao a wink when he catches his blissed out gaze.
“Da-ge,” A-Yao whines.
“Yeah, baby, what’s the matter? Tell me what you want?”
A-Yao softly caresses the length of Mingjue’s cock, the faint touch making it throb. “This,” A-Yao pants.
“You sure, baby?” Mingjue asks, and not to tease. “You’re still so fucking tight.”
“I don’t think fingers can get me looser than this,” A-Yao explains. “Besides, I’m kinda impatient.” He gives a wickedly delicious grin, then pouts. “Oh, poor little A-Yao, so small, so tight. And Da-ge’s cock is so big.” He makes big pleading eyes. “It won’t fit. You’ll just have to fuck me open. Force your way inside.”
Xichen groans, shuddering, then grabs A-Yao’s hips to make him stop moving for a moment before he slams inside with more force and starts fucking vigorously. Mingjue also almost comes on the spot hearing A-Yao’s words, and he’s not even that susceptible to his whiny poor abused little pet act. At least not to the extent Xichen is.
Mingjue tries to play it cool. He slowly pulls his fingers out of A-Yao and grabs the lube from the nightstand.
“Yeah?” he says, slicking his cock up slowly. “That’s what you want, baby? Me to tear into you?”
A-Yao smirks. “That’s exactly what I want.”
“Aw, baby,” Mingjue coos. “It’s gonna hurt so bad. You’ll cry.”
“If I do,” A-Yao says, licking his lips, grinding on top of Xichen, “then you’ll just have to give me something other than cock to cry about.”
Xichen is better at this than Mingjue, but if pain is what A-Yao wants, pain is what Mingjue will deliver. He chuckles, pinching A-Yao’s nipple, making him hiss. “Yeah? Want me to hurt you, baby? Slap you around a bit?”
“Fuck yes,” A-Yao moans as Mingjue smacks his thigh. “Harder.”
Mingjue obeys, giving him a sharp slap on his inner thigh, the skin reddening instantly.
A-Yao shudders, closing his eyes. Mingjue moves closer, lining his cock up with A-Yao’s little hole.
A-Yao grabs Mingjue’s hand, guiding it to his throat. Mingjue grins, wrapping his fingers around that thin elegant neck. He doesn’t squeeze, simply holds firmly enough to be snug, just the way A-Yao likes it. But Mingjue is impatient to fuck in and, in order to tackle that challenge carefully, he will need both hands. So he lets go of A-Yao’s throat, to which A-Yao whines in loud complaint. Brat.
Mingjue spreads his arms, raising his eyebrows, and laughs.
A-Yao snorts. “Is that how you hurt me, Mingjue? Is that how you make me cry? Withholding and denying?” Even his movements betray annoyance and impatience—he’s jumping up and down on Xichen’s cock, picking up pace.
“Don’t be a prick, baby,” Mingjue says, waving his finger at him. “Or I’ll fetch the belt.”
“Fetch a dildo too, while you’re at it,” A-Yao seethes. “Cause that might be the only way I’m getting dp-ed, given you also don’t know what slapping around means.”
Mingjue laughs, but Xichen gives A-Yao’s ass a vicious smack.
“Poppet,” he chuckles. “If you want the belt, ask for it nicely. Don’t be rude, my love, or I’ll stop this and give you the cane.”
A-Yao’s eyes light up for a moment at the mention of the cane, then quickly he collects himself and pouts, but before he can say anything, Mingjue presses a finger against his mouth.
“It’s okay, babe,” he tells Xichen. “I got it.” He grabs A-Yao’s jaw with one hand, leaning down, to bring his face closer. “You want it harder, baby? Was I too soft for you?”
“Yes,” A-Yao says, the S sounding muffled and slushy through his squeezed cheeks.
Mingjue finds it too adorable. Not for the first time he thinks of a tiny kitten hissing at a dog ten times its size. He smiles, giving A-Yao a loud peck.
“What my baby wants, my baby gets,” Mingjue says, releasing A-Yao’s jaw, and launching an attack on his nipples instead.
He pinches, hard and mean, then flicks them with his fingers, pleased to see A-Yao smile. Mingjue wants to smack his ass, but the position is weird, so he settles for a couple of sharp blows to his thighs and whatever area of A-Yao’s bottom he can reach, eliciting a blissful moan from the snarky little brat.
Now, A-Yao’s riding Xichen is more horny and sensual than irritated—he loves the rough treatment.
“Yes, poppet,” Xichen praises. “Such a good boy.”
Mingjue shoves a couple of fingers in A-Yao’s mouth, who sucks readily, slurping around them, his gaze on Mingjue wanton and needy. He smacks his ass a couple more times, then takes his fingers out of A-Yao’s mouth and slaps his cheek lightly.
In a second, the delicious playful look is gone from A-Yao’s eyes. He freezes, mid-movement, and blinks.
Mingjue expects to be berated for not even being able to slap him hard enough, but when A-Yao still doesn’t move, or say anything, Mingjue realises something is wrong.
“Baby?” he asks.
A-Yao opens his mouth, but no words come out. He’s staring ahead but not seeming to actually see either Mingjue in front of him, or the room, or anything. He doesn’t seem present at all.
Xichen can’t see A-Yao’s face, but he can see Mingjue’s, and given that A-Yao has gone rigid on top of him, he probably concludes something is not quite right. He and Mingjue exchange concern looks.
“Baby?” Mingjue whispers. “You okay? You wanna…”
A-Yao shuts his mouth, pale and wide-eyed, with a look of utter fright on his face. Shit.
“A-Yao?” Xichen says. “Is everything alright, love?”
“What’s the matter, baby?” Mingjue asks. “Is it staircase? Wanna safeword? Yeah?”
The mention of staircase seems to bring A-Yao back. He blinks, snapping out of his daze, and gives a weak nod. Xichen immediately pulls out.
They both reach for A-Yao, but he wiggles out of their arms and walks to the bathroom, closing the door behind him. They hear the lock, then the faucet running, then A-Yao shouting a painfully loud and frustrated fuck .
“Shit,” Mingjue swears as he scrambles to the bathroom door. He knocks. “Baby? Open the door. Let us in.”
Xichen gets off the bed, his face worried, and walks over to where Mingjue is standing like an idiot in front of the locked bathroom.
“A-Yao,” Xichen calls softly. “Open the door, sweetheart. Let’s talk.”
Silence.
Mingjue looks at Xichen, desperately scanning his face for a sign that he knows what to do, that he’s got it under control and that it will be fine. Xichen however, while not as bewildered as him, seems to be doing just the same.
“Ah fuck,” Mingjue curses, rubbing his chin. He knocks on the door again, louder this time. “A-Yao? Baby? Open the door, come on.”
When again the only sound coming from the bathroom is the water in the sink running, Mingjue gets restless. He considers kicking the door open. He takes a step back, preparing, but Xichen grabs him roughly by the arm.
“What on earth do you think you’re doing?” he hisses, dragging him towards the bed, away from the door.
Mingjue shakes Xichen’s hand off and glares at him. “You gonna give me shit about the fucking door ?”
“ Not the fucking door , Mingjue,” Xichen whispers, anger seeping through despite obvious intent to appear calm. “Just think for a moment. If he’s locked himself inside, what do you think will happen when you open that door by force? Don’t make this worse than it already is.”
Mingjue scoffs, his temper rising. “So you’re saying it’s my fault? And now I’m making it worse ?”
Xichen takes a deep breath, composing himself, then gently but firmly guides Mingjue to sit on the bed. “I am not saying any of this is your fault,” he explains, squatting in front of him. “I would never say that. Or even think that. I am only pleading with you for patience.”
Mingjue chews his lower lip, frowning, but he lets Xichen talk.
“So instead of us having this pointless argument now...” Xichen leaves it unfinished.
“I know, yeah,” Mingjue sighs. “You’re right. Okay. What do we do?”
But Xichen doesn’t seem to have an answer. He gets up and walks to the bathroom again.
“A-Yao, sweetheart,” he coos, “Please open the door.”
“For fuck sake,” A-Yao shouts from behind the door. “I am fine. I’m in the fucking bathroom , so let me… you know, have some fucking privacy.”
Mingjue walks over, annoyed now. “Bullshit,” he barks at the closed door, but when Xichen gives him a stern disapproving look, he continues in a softer tone “Open the door, baby. Come on, this is really dumb.”
Xichen, again, pushes Mingjue away. “A-Yao,” he says. “It’s okay, we will give you some time alone, if that’s what you need. But there’s no need to go through this on your own. We’re here for you, sweetheart.”
A-Yao doesn’t respond.
Mingjue feels he is being suffocated by the silence that falls on them. His body vibrates with impatient anger, but most of all, he feels helpless. He doesn’t know what to do to make this right. He knows he would do whatever it takes, but A-Yao is not giving him a single clue. And Xichen also seems at a loss.
When Mingjue takes another step towards the bathroom door, Xichen practically drags him outside of their bedroom.
“Mingjue,” he whispers. “Why don’t you let me handle this?”
Mingjue is a little offended. He knows Xichen probably is better at sorting this out, with his calm patient manner, but he still feels a bit snubbed.
“Hey,” Xichen rubs Mingjue’s shoulder, giving a little reassuring squeeze, “I know how you feel.”
“Oh do you really?” Mingjue asks, shaking off Xichen’s hand, his tone mocking, full of disdain. He hates himself for taking out his frustration now by being difficult with Xichen, but he can’t help it.
But Xichen, endlessly understanding, doesn’t take it the wrong way. He brings Mingjue’s hand to his face and kisses his palm. “I think I do, yes.” He cups Mingjue’s cheek gently. “Maybe a workout? To de-stress a bit. And I’ll coax him out by the time you’re back.”
Mingjue nods. Xichen is right. Mingjue trusts he will handle it. He grabs his sweatpants and walks to the end of the hallway, then shuts himself in his home gym slash home office.
He throws the sweatpants on the floor, not even sure why he got them, then, with all his helpless fury, he attacks the punching bag. He hits and hits and hits, until his fists hurt. Then he kicks and spins and jumps furiously through the movements of his usual workout routine, practising the forms until he’s out of breath. Then he goes back to the punching bag and beats it some more. By the time he’s thoroughly exhausted, he is sweaty and aching all over. It must’ve been almost two hours. He uses his discarded pants to wipe the sweat off his face and chest, then takes a deep breath and goes back to the bedroom.
As he approaches, he finds Xichen stepping out. Mingjue stops as Xichen pulls the door closed, but not shutting it completely.
“Did you have a good workout?” Xichen asks, a gentle smile on his lips.
“I had...a workout.” Mingjue clutches the sweatpants in his hand, hardly daring to ask anything. But Xichen’s smile and calm air reassures him. “Is he okay?”
“Yes, he seems to be fine now,” Xichen confirms. “He’s sleeping.”
“What the fuck was all that about, babe?” Mingjue asks, finally feeling some relief.
“It’s…” Xichen places his hand, warm and tender, on Mingjue’s chest. “He didn’t know he’d react like that.”
“I feel like shit, babe,” Mingjue says. “I’d never… You know.”
“I know, love. I know,” Xichen comes closer, pulling Mingjue into a hug. “We couldn’t have known. He himself didn’t know. But it’s okay now. I promise. We talked, and he’s asleep now.”
Mingjue breathes in the smell of Xichen’s hair, feeling his tense muscles relax in Xichen’s arms.
“Did you cry?” Xichen asks.
“No,” Mingjue lies.
He hears Xichen give a soft chuckle, holding Mingjue tighter. When he lets go, they kiss. Slow and gentle and soothing. Mingjue wishes to disappear inside that kiss, to fall asleep and wake up a year later, when all this is far behind, or yesterday, to make everything happen differently.
“Did you clear out the dinner mess?” Xichen asks. “The dishes and—”
“Fucking hell, Xichen,” Mingjue cuts him off. “Of course I didn’t do the fucking dishes. I was—”
“No, no,” Xichen soothes him, “I didn’t mean like that. I want to do them. That’s why I asked.” He caresses Mingjue’s cheeks, giving him another kiss. “I could use some de-stressing too.”
“Right,” Mingjue whispers. “Sorry, babe. Didn’t mean to snap.”
“I know,” Xichen tells him. “It’s okay.” He whispers into Mingjue’s mouth, “I love you.”
Mingjue holds him tight, whispering to his ear, “I love you too, babe. So much.”
Xichen smiles, taking a step back. “Right, I shall go clean the kitchen. You go stay with A-Yao. Let him sleep. Just be there if he wakes up. And call me if...anything.”
The bedroom is completely dark. Mingjue slowly walks up to the bed where A-Yao is lying curled under the duvet. Mindful not to wake him, Mingjue half-sits half-lies, leaning against the headboard. It’s chilly, and he’s naked, post-workout sweat already dry on him, but he doesn’t dare to cover himself, not wishing to disturb A-Yao.
He closes his eyes, breathing deep and trying to ignore the cold, when the duvet moves and a hand reaches out, touching his forearm.
Mingjue looks down and is greeted with A-Yao’s eyes open so wide that it’s impossible he was asleep.
“Hey you,” Mingjue whispers. “What’s up?”
A-Yao smiles at his stupid question. “You stink.”
“Yeah,” Mingjue says, stretching. “Didn’t shower after my workout. The bathroom was off limits last time I checked.”
“Fuck you, Mingjue,” A-Yao says, but it is tender, and through a chuckle. “Come, you must be cold.”
Mingjue gets lower down on the bed, making himself more comfortable, finally getting under the duvet. “Sorry about the smell,” he says.
“Mhm,” A-Yao whispers, pressing closer to him. “It’s okay. I like how you smell.”
“How you feelin, baby?” Mingjue asks, embracing him.
A-Yao shrugs. “Okay, I guess?”
“Mhm. Why’d you fake being asleep?”
“Didn’t want Xichen to worry.”
“Yeah, makes sense,” Mingjue says. “I guess I’m fine to worry though?”
A-Yao smiles through a soft exhale of breath. “You’d worry more if I was asleep and didn’t talk to you about this till morning.”
Mingjue kisses his forehead. “Clever.” He slowly strokes A-Yao’s back. “So, what happened? How are you really feeling?”
“I’m really feeling okay now,” A-Yao says, nestling closer, hooking his leg over Mingjue’s thigh. “I just freaked out. I didn’t know I would.”
“I’m sorry, baby,” Mingjue says. “You know I’d never—”
“I know,” A-Yao is quick to reassure him. “I know. It’s not your fault. Please don’t feel bad.” He sighs. “And I’m sorry I locked myself in the bathroom. I just...I felt stupid. And embarrassed. To freak out like that.”
“No, baby,” Mingjue says, rocking him in his arms. “Don’t feel stupid. It’s nothing to be embarrassed about. Thank god for Xichen. I’d have kicked the door open. Made it worse. Talk about stupid.”
“You big brute,” A-Yao whispers, then gives Mingjue’s nipple a soft kiss. “But yeah, thank god for Xichen, clever enough for two, as you and I are both stupid.”
“Nah, baby,” Mingjue says. “You’re not stupid. These things happen. It was a...natural reaction.”
“I felt…” A-Yao pauses, swallowing a gulp. “I don’t know why. It didn’t hurt or anything. It was just… I felt like I was dying. Being torn to pieces.”
“Aw, baby.” Mingjue holds him tighter, burying his head in A-Yao’s hair.
“Like all around me, the whole world was crumbling,” A-Yao continues. “I didn’t see you, or feel Xichen inside me. I only saw dark and blood and dust, and felt like my whole body was being cut, then suffocated, or crushed beneath a heavy stone. It smelled like blood and incense and rain and death . Like the world was disappearing. I never felt anything like that before.”
Mingjue doesn’t know what to say. He just holds him.
“It was so vivid. I felt it so deep,” A-Yao says. “In my soul.”
“Shit, baby,” Mingjue says. “That sounds rough. We won’t do that again.”
“No, we won’t.” A-Yao shakes his head. “Now we know. Thank you, by the way, for seeing me. For seeing I was off. I couldn’t say the safeword. I… Thank you.”
“Sure thing, baby,” Mingjue says. “Of course. You were really out of it, yeah. It was clear. Even without you safewording.” He nuzzles at A-Yao’s ear. “Did you tell Xichen? About how it felt?”
“No,” A-Yao says, sounding sad. “Don’t tell him, please.”
“Why not?” Mingjue is surprised, as he usually feels he’s the one on the sidelines, with A-Yao and Xichen telling each other everything.
“I’ll tell him tomorrow. I didn’t want to make him… He was so patient, he tried so hard. And I was already embarrassed, and feeling stupid. I thought I should make it easy for him, so I told him my father used to slap me and then I pretended to fall asleep.”
“Oh fucking hell, baby,” Mingjue groans. “Why’d you… Did he really use to slap you?”
“Well, a few times, but that’s not why I freaked out.” A-Yao looks up at him. “I will tell him. Tomorrow. I just… We talked and I was calm, and I will be calm again tomorrow when I tell him. I just...need to cry it out first.”
“So you waited for me.”
“So I waited for you.”
Mingjue nods. “Okay then.” He shifts, wrapping more of himself with a duvet. “I’m here, baby. I got you.”
They lie embraced in silence for a while. A dry , tearless silence.
“No?” Mingjue eventually asks.
A-Yao sighs. “No.”
“Should I, I don’t know, coddle you?” Mingjue asks. “Want me to slap you again? Sorry, it’s a stupid joke.”
A-Yao smiles. “You’re such a prick, Mingjue. I love you.”
Mingjue bites his lip. A-Yao doesn’t say that easily. Or often. He feels his own eyes swell with tears. Well, at least someone will be crying it all out.
“Next time I see your father,” Mingjue says, “I’ll smash his fucking head in.”
And that’s what does it for A-Yao. He looks up, swallows hard, his chin wobbly, and blinks.
“Mingjue,” he manages before his voice breaks.
“I know, baby.” Mingjue squeezes him tight. “I know. I got you.”
A-Yao presses his face to Mingjue’s chest and sobs as Mingjue rubs his hand between A-Yao’s shoulder blades, feeling his chest hair slowly soak up A-Yao’s tears. He lets him cry, holding him tight, rocking him gently, whispering some soothing loving nonsense, kissing his hair.
After some time, A-Yao’s sobbing subsides, but Mingjue keeps on comforting him, tender and quiet, until A-Yao, warm and snug and small, falls asleep for real. Mingjue himself is already dozing off when Xichen returns. He feels the mattress shift slightly, as Xichen gets into the bed, then snuggles closer to them, wrapping one arm over A-Yao. Mingjue moves his leg to touch Xichen’s calf, and Xichen, in response, smiles at him in the dark. They are warm. Together. And they sleep.