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Tod knew he was shaking.
He stepped forward, right up to the barrel of the gun that Black was aiming at his face.
"Go ahead," Tod goaded, his throat tight, burning from the refusal to cry more than the tears that were already pooling in his eyes. If Black did it, if Black killed him now, then it would prove that their friendship means nothing to him anymore. That alone would have killed Tod, so at least the gun would've done it before his own heart did the job.
"If you can."
+++
Eight years ago.
"Black, stop! Stop!" Tod desperately pulled at his friend's arm. "The teacher's coming."
"You fucking touch my friend again and I'll fuck you up." Black jabbed his finger in the upper classmen's face. The senior who had thought he could prove himself tough by daring to pick on the rich kid. Now he lay on the floor curled on his side with blood leaking slowly from his nose.
"You're fucking crazy!" The guy spat, but he didn't retaliate.
Tod managed to drag Black around the corner before the clacking heels he could hear storming down the hallway came across his friend beating another student to a pulp.
Black shook off Tod's grip and wiped his forearm under his nose, checking for blood. When he saw none he scoffed. "Asshole didn't even punch me properly."
Todd was silent as he walked next to Black on the way to the canteen, where he'd been heading before the senior stepped into his path. Black would probably get detention since it was the first time he'd gotten into a fight in their new school. White had been gone for two years and he was the only person Tod had seen Black get into fights over. Until now.
The only person he had seen Black get protective over.
Until now.
Tod smiled and kept walking.
+++
A year ago.
Black is impassioned, pacing the room as he raves to Tod about his mom and a case he discovered she'd had a part in sweeping under the table. His tattoo makes appearances from under his shirt sleeve now and again, and Tod wants to lick it.
He makes a comment - one Black doesn't want to hear - half because he means it and half because he wants to rile Black up. Black turns to him with a dark gaze and Tod responds with a smirk.
"What?" he twirls his cocktail glass slowly, letting the liquid get close to the edge but refusing to let it spill over. "You know I'm right."
"But we can change things Tod. There have to be more people out there like us who want to get rid of men like Tawi. Who want to make a difference. With your resources we can get the word out there."
"And what are you all going to do? Punch him until he changes his mind?"
"Fuck off Tod. If there are enough of us out there making our voices heard they'll have to take notice. We'll make them notice us."
Black has been hot-headed and passionate as long as Tod has known him, which was a long time. If he heard of anyone bothering White, and sometimes Tod, he was throwing a punch at their face seconds later, impulse control be damned.
Whereas Tod would've had his dad pay the school to have the bully kicked out. Much more effective, in his opinion. And he didn't like getting his hands dirty.
Recently, Tod's dad had passed away, leaving him everything. His money, his influence, his power. All handed to Tod on a platter.
And he wanted to use it to help Black. He really did. He saw the way that the weak and powerless have been trampled on by men like Tawi time and time again. Men who used their power to squash those who weren't like them. Used them as pawns in their capitalist schemes, denied them rights when it didn't benefit the conservative rich.
Nowadays when he and Black met up, the discussion always inevitably turned back to what injustice Black had heard about from some of his other law classmates and what resource pool Tod could sink money into. There were of course times when they didn't agree. And times when Tod pretended not to agree so he could feel the same unusual fire creep up his spine when Black leaned over him and argued so passionately he was almost yelling, his hand gripping the leather back of Tod's chair.
This feeling was new. But Tod didn't hate it.
+++
10 months ago.
The first time something they organised together made a difference, they drank until they could barely stand. They were in Tod's penthouse, as always, sprawled on one of his many sofas. It would be wrong to say that Black was smiling, but he looked happy. Tod could tell.
Until Tod said something stupid - he doesn't remember what, only that it shattered their joyful serenity like glass. Black shoved him as hard as he could, which wasn't very hard at all in his inebriated state, but Tod's own state meant that he wobbled and tipped off the sofa anyway.
"Stop saying shit like that. Of course it's making a difference."
There was Black being his overly stubborn self again. Never listening to what Tod had to say.
Tod flailed out with a leg and kicked Black where he could reach. Black leaned forward to push his leg away and fell right onto the floor on top of him. They shoved and pushed at each other. Irritations left festering under the skin coming to light all at once. Tod's shirt was missing half its buttons, falling open halfway down his chest. Black had blood running from his lip, a matching smear stained Todd's elbow. He was going to have a black eye to match his hangover in the morning.
Eventually, when his coffee table had taken a hit and a decorative art book had landed on Black's foot, they fell into a state of quiet. Tod was hovering over Black, who had his legs curled up between Tod's thighs from where he had pulled his feet up with a hiss. Black's expression didn't shift as he lifted a finger and trailed it down Tod's chest left visible by his tattered shirt.
Then Black got up from under Tod and gave him one last kick in the side before laying down on the couch and passing out.
+++
6 months ago.
Black has found himself a gang. Realised he had some shared interests with some guy in his classes who introduced him to his friends.
Tod doesn't care. They've hardly spoken.
Black moved into his own place. Claimed he didn't need to be freeloading off Tod any more. Tod doesn't care.
He looks himself in the mirror as he gets ready for a gala with the rest of Bangkok's 1%. He traces a finger down his chest until it hits the fourth button down, the first one actually holding his dark maroon shirt closed.
He doesn't care.
+++
4 months ago.
Black met some girl when he was out protesting. She preforms interpretive dance or something.
According to Black's drunken voicemail she tastes like strawberries.
Whereas Tod has recently decided he prefers the taste of power.
+++
Two months ago.
Black knew. Tod could tell by the fist flying at his face. He ducked and punched Black in his sternum, who recovered with a kick to Tod's left knee, the one he'd injured playing football as a kid. Todd stumbled and his men caught him and pushed him into the back seat of the car idly waiting in the middle of the parking garage he'd been calmly waking through before Black came flying at him.
"You piece of shit! You're just like him! YOU'RE JUST LIKE HIM!" Black was screaming as the last of his security team dragged Black away from the car. The car was already pulling out of the garage as Tod caught the image of Black standing still in the spot where Tod's men had dragged him to, away from the car. To the untrained eye he looked calm, but Tod could see the faint movement of slow breaths in Black's shoulders, backlit by the building behind him. He was a seething dark mass of anger and Todd knew it was only because he was a few steps away from his car that he walked away from this with only an aching knee.
Usually Black would be more cunning, catching his enemies where they couldn't run. Next time Tod knew he wouldn't be so lucky.
He makes the call.
Less than 30 seconds later he calls the number again.
"Don't kill him."
He hangs up.
+++
One month ago.
"Black might seem like a bad guy on the outside, but he's actually a good guy." Tod looks at Black's prone form lying on the hospital bed. White is standing concernedly beside him, trying to piece together fragments of his brother's life.
"I'm not surprised his friend likes him."
His smile hurts.
+++
A few days ago.
Tod knew it was Black pretending to be White the second he walked into his penthouse. His heart tightened. Nerves?
He knew why Black was here.
He knew it all too well, that's why he had pored his own drink before adding the pill to the canter of whiskey.
And yet, when he had Black held under water, when he was so, so close to getting rid of someone who would only be a pest in his way, he couldn't. His heart tightened again. Guilt?
The image of Black going limp underwater was blurred by his tears.
Fuck.
Tod pulled him out.
+++
Now.
"I've got somewhere to be," Black drawls, lowering his gun. As if this whole thing suddenly bored him.
Tod tried not to show his relief, but the feeling was so strong it felt like it consumed every part of him.
Black couldn't kill him.
"Where?" Was all he could say. If he tried to say more all his intended words would inevitably warp into stay, stay, stay.
"I'm on standby for White and his Scooby Gang. I'm sure they'll need my help sooner rather than later." Black made sure the safety latch was in place and secured the gun in his jeans.
The sudden absence of adrenaline left Tod feeling like he was on a high. As Black moved to walk around him Tod stepped to his right and stopped him with a hand to his chest. Black looked up at him under his lashes, refusing to submit and tilt his head up to face him.
"Think about it Black."
"Think about what?"
"You know what, you asshole. Us." Tod wanted to end the sentence there. "Us working together. As fun as this has been, I don't want to keep doing this with you. We want the same thing. You want the power to bring Tawi to his knees and I'm so close to getting it."
Black didn't move. "I don't trust you."
"But for some reason I still trust you." Tod couldn't catch the honesty as it crawled up his throat. "You tell me what to do and I'll do it."
That got Black moving. He pushed forward and shoved Tod back, again and again until his back hit the bar counter. "And how do I know you won't turn around and use it against me, huh? Use it against all of us little ants?" Black was right up against Tod, punctuating every word with a finger to Tod's chest. "We're getting somewhere, I promise you. This scheme tonight is going to turn the tides. You could be the one with the power after tonight, and why should I let you? What makes you different from Tawi, huh? What do you have that he doesn't-"
"You. I have you." Tod stared down at Black, whose near yell was abruptly cut off by Tod's calm confession. They're still pressed together, Black's index finger still pressed painfully into the skin above Tod's heart. Tod could feel the tears spring into his eyes again as he stared into Black's, but fuck it, he meant it. Fuck it, he wanted it.
A second passed before Tod felt his head get violently yanked downwards and Black's lips crushed into his. Suddenly the adrenaline from before was back, yet born anew. This time they weren't trying to hurt each other when Black's nails clawed under Tod's shirt, or when Tod bit the curve of Black's shoulder.
Yes, this was it. Tod knew it, he had known it. This was it.
Tod grabbed the back of Black's thighs and lifted him, spinning so their positions were reversed. The bar counter was too high for Black to sit on and still have Tod's tongue in his mouth so instead it was cutting into his lower back. He grunted at the jab of pain as the gun pressed into his spine when Tod pushed closer up against him and retaliated with a bite to his lower lip.
And then Black's phone rang.
Tod knew he would answer it, no matter what. It could be White. So he moved to focus on Black's neck as Black took the call. After a tense few minutes where Tod strained to hear the speaker on the end of the line and Black mostly answered with grunts or single words, Black hung up and slid his phone back into his pocket and pulled Tod's face up in a way that almost gave him whiplash.
"It's time to prove it."
"Prove what?"
"That I can trust you."
Tod released Black's thighs and set him down in a way that could be considered gentle compared what they'd just been doing, but still allowed him to slide a hand over Black's thighs and ass. He looked at Black and Black looked at him. This was it, their turning point. Their us moment.
Us against them. Not us against one another. Not any more.
Tod nodded.
"Tell me what you need me to do."
+++
The end.