Chapter Text
I can go the distance
I don't care how far
Somehow I'll be strong
I know every mile
Will be worth my while
I would go most anywhere to find where I belong ~(Go the Distance, Hercules)
A green snake slithered in the high grass of a meadow. A young girl, black hair tied in a tight braid that swung across her shoulder to the rhythmic pounding of her horse's hooves, whispered a soft command to the horse to go faster. And faster. And faster still.
The wind stung her cheeks, and she thought that nothing could compare to the euphoria and freedom she was experiencing at that moment. Oblivious to the poisonous snake, coiling round and round itself, she continued to urge her horse on.
It all happened in a split second: The hooves came down too near the snake and, feeling threatened, it struck out and bit. The horse reared in pain, and Regina fell off of it. In the ensuing panicked and pained stamping and running, a hoof landed on Regina's stomach, hard.
In one blow, Regina forever lost her ability to bear children. She fell into unconsciousness.
"You see where your disobedience has led you?" Cora shouted at her daughter, enraged. Regina hardly seemed to hear her, she was sitting on her bed, shaking like a leaf.
"I told you over and over again that riding the way you did was unladylike, but you had to disobey me and go ride that horse, and the stupid beast has rendered you barren! What kind of man will want to marry a girl that can't bring him heirs?"
"Cora!" Henry interrupted fiercely, "This is not the time for a lecture!"
Cora stared in shock at her normally quiet and meek husband, but after a minute her face softened and she nodded.
"Sweetheart." Sitting down on her daughter's bed, she lightly touched her shoulder. "I'm sorry for shouting. Your father was right: it was out of place. I'm just so frustrated! There's nothing I would love more than to cure you right now."
"But you won't?" Regina asked.
"Regina, don't you ever listen to me? All magic comes with a price, you should know this. And what do you think the price is for giving something the ability to create life?"
"A life?" Regina asked.
"Exactly. A life."
"Since when have you been squeamish about killing to get what you want?" asked Regina bitterly.
"Not any life, Regina. My own." Cora answered firmly.
"Oh."
"But don't worry about this too much, darling, I'll fix everything. The man who found you and the servants who saw you will be silenced, no one need know about this incident. I shall ensure that your marriage prospects will in no way be affected by this."
At these words, Regina jumped away from her mother, almost as if she had been stung. "You think that that's what I care about? Who you get rid of so my marriage prospects won't be ruined? Go to hell!" And she ran out of the room before Cora could form a reply.
Cora sighed softly. "Why can't I reach my daughter?" she asked her husband mournfully, "Why does she keep pushing me away?"
Henry rolled his eyes, and left the room with a huff, leaving Cora alone.
Regina ran. She wanted to be as far from her mother and every other person in the castle as possible. She kept running when she reached the edge of her property, and didn't pause when she came to the edge of the forest that began near her home and stretched for miles beyond. It was only when she was so far into the forest that she began to worry about being able to find her way out that Regina allowed herself to sit on a fallen log and cry.
She always knew that one day she would be a mother. She was still young, but she'd already dreamed of having a little child of her own to take care of, to raise, and to love without limits. Some girls were simply meant to be mothers. Not all of them; God knew her own mother wasn't the type, but Regina had always known she would be a wonderful mother and had always wanted that for herself.
Now there was no hope of that ever happening, and Regina wept bitterly.
The crack of a twig made her head snap up. She had been hoping for complete privacy, and didn't want anyone to see her in her current state. She was feeling resentful towards the person who had interrupted her cry, until the person stepped out from behind a tree, and revealed itself to be a little girl.
She couldn't be more than five or six years old, and her eyes were red from crying. A tear fell from her eye and slid down her nose where it mingled with the snot the crying had caused. The girl lifted her sleeve to wipe helplessly at the snot, and the gesture was so childlike and messy that the knowledge that she would never have to deal with snotty noses and dirty diapers caused another sob to tear itself from Regina's throat.
Her sob must have set the little girl off, because she slid to the floor with a choked wail and for the next few minutes, the two of them sat one across from the other crying their eyes out.
Once her hysteria died down a bit, and it seemed like the girl's sobs were also losing momentum, Regina had the presence of mind to examine the girl. Her clothes spoke of a wealthy family which was surprising, considering that mainly peasants lived in the immediate area. The girl was obviously quite a ways from her home.
"Would you like to tell me why you are crying, sweetheart?" Regina ventured gently, "Maybe I can help you."
"I-I'm" the girl hiccuped "I'm lost, and I can't ever go home."
"Don't think like that!" said Regina encouragingly "I'll help you get home."
"Even if I knew how to get home, I can't ever go back!" Insisted the girl stubbornly.
"Why is that?"
The girl shrugged obstinately and remained silent.
Regina sighed softly, before gathering her patience. "I'm Regina, what's your name?"
"Belle."
"That's a beautiful name." Belle was a pretty little thing, and Regina was of the opinion that she would live up to her name as she grew. She absently wondered if she herself would ever live up to the name her mother had given her, and if she even wanted to.
"And where do you live, Belle?" she asked.
"In my Papa's castle." the girl responded promptly. Regina stifled a chuckle.
"Care to be a bit more specific?" she asked, while wracking her brains for castles in the area.
"My Papa is Maurice," Belle answered, "and the castle is right near Avonlea."
Avonlea? That was half a kingdom away!
"So you were traveling here and got separated from the group?"
Belle shook her head emphatically. "No, I ran away from home."
How in the world had the child managed to get this far? "Belle, sweetheart, I want to help you, but I don't think I can without knowing more. Will you please tell me what happened?"
Belle examined her searchingly for a second. "I'll tell you what happened to me, if you agree to tell me why you were crying."
"It's a deal." Regina replied.
"And you need to promise not to tell on me." Belle added a stipulation.
"To who?" Regina asked.
Belle shuddered. "The clerics."
"I promise." Regina replied, becoming more curious. Perhaps this was not just a simple case of a little girl fighting with her parents and running away from home.
"I got angry at a boy and I think I killed him." Belle got right to the point.
Regina gasped. "You what?"
"It was an accident!" Belle protested. "He took my book from me and threw in in the mud, and I just got so angry at his stupid face, and wanted to hurt him for being so horrible, and suddenly there was a puff of smoke, and instead of a boy there was a rose there!" She reached into her pocket and pulled out a slightly crushed rose. "I kept it."
"That must have been terrifying," Regina crooned, and drew the girl close in a hug. "You don't need to be afraid, though. I know this must be very confusing to you, but what happened is that you accidentally used magic."
"I know!" Belle cried, sounding even more hysterical than she had been a second ago.
"This is a good thing, Belle," Regina tried to tell her. "If it was done by magic, it means it can also be undone by magic. You should actually be proud, that's very powerful magic for you to have used accidentally. My mother is a sorceress, and she's told me I have potential to become a powerful magic user, but I've never been able to do anything like that accidentally."
"I don't want to be a powerful magician!" Belle protested hotly "I don't want the clerics to get me!"
This was the second time Belle had mentioned clerics. "What clerics are you talking about?"
"They're the people who make you better." Belle told her. "If someone had been evil and has let the dark magic into their souls, they're the ones who take the evil out. They do it with flaying and scourges." The girl shuddered.
Regina closed her eyes in pity. She knew of the religion that claimed that magic users were people who had sold their souls to demons and had very drastic views about how to 'cure' such people. Accidentally turning a boy into a rose was scary enough, Regina couldn't imagine how much more terrifying the experience would be for a girl who had been taught that her magic was a sign she was possessed by a demon and needed to be flayed.
Regina wrapped her arms around Belle as tightly as she could without hurting her. Her heart went out to the little girl.
"Listen Belle," she whispered softly in the girl's ear, still hugging her "I'm going to help you. Like I said, my mother's a powerful sorceress. I can help you turn the boy back and keep it a secret."
"Will your mother teach me how to reverse what I did?" Belle asked, pulling back to look Regina in the eyes.
Regina grimaced at the mention of her mother. "I'll tell you what: I'll try my best to guide you based on what I've learned about magic from her. If that fails, and only if it fails, we'll go consult my mother."
Belle nodded, looking quite a bit cheerier.
"Now," Regina told her patiently. "Start by describing to me everything that happened, starting with turning the boy into a rose."
Belle complied, sniffling a little throughout the story. "I was reading a book on my way home, and he just walked up to me and took it out of my hand. He's a lot taller than me, so I couldn't grab it back. He looked at it, and asked me how I could read it when it didn't have any pictures- he's such a stupid-head," she giggled a bit. "Anyways, he threw my book in the mud, and I felt so so mad, and he didn't even realize why I cared about the book, and that just made me even madder, and then suddenly there was purple smoke, and when it cleared away there was a rose where he was standing. I just knew it was him."
At this point in the story tears began running down Belle's face again. "I picked him up, and I just got so scared thinking about how I'd killed him, and how mad Papa would be, and how the clerics would whip me for being evil and using dark magic, and I just wished I was as far away from home as possible, and there was more purple smoke, and when it cleared I was here, and then I saw you. You were crying." she added as an afterthought.
That explained a lot about how Belle had managed to get here all the way from Avonlea, Regina mused.
"Alright." She told Belle, trying to sound as confident as possible, "one of the most basic facts about magic, and one that your own experience can back up, is that magic is fueled by emotion. If you're untrained in magic, and can't use it easily, the thing you need to do is focus on your feelings, because they're what caused the magic to respond to you. Your magic turned the boy into a rose as a reaction to your anger, and brought you here as a result of your fear. Now I want you to concentrate on an emotion that will turn stupid-head here back into a little boy. Think about how worried you are about him, how sorry you are for accidentally enchanting him, and how scared you are about him going missing. Just take a deep breath, take your time, and concentrate on those emotions."
Regina watched in trepidation as Belle listened carefully, and then closed her eyes and scrunched her little face up in concentration. She knew that what she had told Belle was true in theory, but having no experience with using magic herself, was unsure how much help she could really be.
To her immense relief, though, a few seconds later there was a puff of purple smoke, and where Belle had placed the rose on the ground, there now lay a handsome little boy, looking a bit rumpled, but none the worse for wear.
He rubbed his eyes slowly and then looked around. "What's going on?"
"What do you remember?" Regina asked him.
He eyed her suspiciously, but then his eyes fell on Belle. "Belle and I were playing together, and then there was suddenly purple smoke, and the next thing I know- I'm here." He turned to address Belle. "What happened?"
Belle looked as panicked as a deer caught in a huntsman's gaze, and shot Regina a pleading look.
"What happened was magic," Regina told the boy. "I am a very powerful evil witch and I have brought you here with magic."
The boy's mouth dropped open, and he scrambled away from her. "What are you going to do with us?"
"Well, I was going to bake you in a pie and eat you," Regina replied casually. "But luckily for you, your little friend here has made a deal with me to save you both. Uhhh- if she manages to cook me a meal that tastes even better than little-children pie, I will let her go in exchange for the recipe."
She turned to Belle. "You- come with me to my house, where you will cook for me. You-" she turned to address the boy again, "stay here and wait for us to come back."
She began marching away, and Belle quickly followed her, pausing only to turn around to call to the boy: "Don't worry Gaston, I'm sure my apple turnover will be far far better than any pie!" and with that she ran to catch up to Regina.
Regina stopped, though, to eye the boy- Gaston. There was a good chance he'd try to run away, and she didn't want to even think of how much trouble tracking him down would be. "And don't try to run away." she told the boy. "I cast a spell on you while you were unconscious so that if you try you'll turn into a slug. Just sit still until we get back."
They trotted away quickly until Regina was sure they were out of the boy's hearing range. Then, she stopped, and leaned against a tree, facing Belle.
"Thank you so much, Regina!" Belle exclaimed "Now when I get home, no one will know about the magic!"
"My pleasure, love." Regina told her warmly.
"Can you believe what a dummy he is?" Belle demanded, "I can't believe he said we'd been playing together, when he had actually been bothering me!"
Regina hadn't the heart to tell her that Gaston's 'bothering' as she called it, probably meant that the boy had a crush on her. Instead she turned to more practical matters. "Now, all we need to do is wait about half an hour, I doubt he knows how much time making an apple turnover actually takes. When we go back, I'll declare that the meal was delicious and that I'm letting you go. I'll tell him to close his eyes while I cast the spell, and then you just take as much time as you need to summon up the emotion to go home. All's well that ends well."
Belle sighed with relief, before perking up a bit. "You still owe me something."
"Oh?" Regina said, arching her eyebrow.
"You said that if I told you why I was crying, you'd tell me why you were."
Regina sighed. She intended to keep her promise, but she wasn't sure just how suitable the subject was for a girl of approximately five or six years old. Would she be able to understand?
Pushing away her misgivings, Regina told Belle of her accident and ensuing injury. She told her of the discovery that she would never be able to bear children. She told her of the secret dreams she had harbored, of a little boy to love and call her own (she would have named him Henry after her own father). As she talked to Belle, she could feel some stray tears escaping her eyes, though she didn't burst out crying again.
When Regina finished, Belle stared at her solemnly, looking for a moment far older than her age. "You know," she finally said, "I've never had a mother. She died before I could remember her." The sweet little girl trailed off, leaving the conclusion to that trail of thought implied.
It was so innocent, so heartfelt, that Regina couldn't tell her what she should have. She couldn't bring herself to tell Belle that she was a stranger and they hardly knew each other, or that it was unhealthy to substitute a young woman who lived half a kingdom away for her mother. Instead, she pulled Belle into her arms, and buried her face in the girl's soft hair.
They walked back towards Gaston holding hands, parting them only once they were within the boy's field of view.
Six years later
"Regina!" Belle's voice was sunny and happy, but the smile dropped from her face as she got a closer look at Regina.
Regina had been sitting huddled on her bed, wishing Belle would find an opportunity to visit tonight, and she smiled softly at Belle's appearance in the usual puff of purple smoke that heralded her arrival.
Belle was a sharp one, though, and hadn't missed Regina's distress. "What's wrong?" she asked, coming to sit beside Regina on the bed.
"Remember Snow?" Regina asked.
"Yes, you saved her life." Belle's voice was warm with pride.
"Her father, King Leopold, came to visit us. He said that he'd been looking for a long time for a wife but wasn't able to find one who loved Snow and wanted what was best for her. Once I'd saved Snow's life he decided that I should be his new wife."
"And what do you think of him?" Belle asked.
"Kind, but foolish." Belle was the only person other than her father that Regina could speak so openly to. "I don't think he could make me happy."
"So you won't marry him then?" Belle said, sounding more hopeful than sure.
Regina snorted. "Don't be naive, Belle. Do you really think my mother would allow me to refuse?"
Belle had never met Cora, but she had heard enough from Regina to have her measure. "No." she shook her head, "I suppose she wouldn't."
"I don't want to marry him, Belle." Regina said softly and with so much sadness in her voice it nearly broke Belle's heart. Feeling for once like the adult in their relationship, Belle petted Regina's hair gently, trying to comfort her.
If Regina's eyes hadn't been clouded by tears she might have recognized the look on Belle's face. She might have seen how the furrowed brow that meant she was deep in thought gave way to the straightened shoulders and bright eyes that signified stubborn determination.
"You should run away."
Regina huffed a laugh. "You think my mother hasn't any safeguards against that? Spells to alert her when I try to run, spells to keep me from going too far? I tried to run away once as a teen," she smiled bitterly "I didn't get very far."
"I'll break the spells!" Belle told her eagerly, "I'm constantly improving my magic, especially now that you got me those spellbooks! I could do it, I'm sure of it!"
Regina looked as if she didn't want to hope, but couldn't quite help it. "Do you really think you could do it?"
Belle nodded earnestly. "I'm positive."
Regina sighed wistfully. "I've always dreamed of being free. Of living the way I want, without needing to worry about being lady-like or pleasing anyone but myself. It always seemed like a dream, though. Not something to actively pursue."
"It doesn't have to be just a dream!" Belle protested, "Let me help you! Just in case, give me a few days to read up on some things that might help. I want to make sure your mother won't know or suspect anything. Just pack a bag and be ready to leave at the drop of a hat. I'll be back within the next few days."
Regina agreed, and Belle smiled proudly, happy to be of help to her closest friend, before popping away in the usual purple cloud of magic.
Regina smiled softly, torn between utter excitement and fear that their plan was too good to be true. She shook the fear out of her mind though, and concentrated on making plans to pack.