Work Text:
Pete's POV
All of a sudden, I can't stand the sound of Dr. D's voice. The words he just spoke causing my head to spiral. "Bad news from the zones Tumbleweeds, it is with my deepest sadness that I announce this. Unfortunately today all four of The Fabulous Killjoys were ghosted inside the BL/Ind building. Don't let this discourage you from still fighting. They would want us all to carry on. Let's have a moment of silence for Party Poison, Fun Ghoul, Jet Star, and Kobra Kid, our fallen heroes." I have lost Mikey.
I feel sick, dizzy, and like the whole world is crashing down on me. My head fills with images of his face, his signature smirk, his eyes. My knees give in and I fall to the floor. Patrick sits on the floor next to me as Dr. D's voice starts up again, "I must now assign the duty of their body retrievals. The Youngbloods will head into battery city to bring them home to the zones. American Psycho, Soul Punk, Death Valley, and Young Volcano, we are counting on you." The words leave me in more shock. My crew have to go retrieve them.
"When you're ready, we'll get going." Patrick tells me as he goes to get Andy and Joe. He knows to give me a minute alone, because I'm unpredictable. I could turn on him if he was here alone with me, and I'd hate to do that to my best friend. I'm furious, distraught, and so fucking confused right now. Why would Dr. D make me go collect the body of someone who meant the world to me? That's just downright cruel.
I'm not even sure I can go through with it. I don't want to see him like that. I'd rather keep my last memory of him the way it is. Him telling me he loved me, and me telling him I loved him, just as he was about to set off on this mission. Our final kiss before he was dragged away by his brother. I'd rather remember him like that than laying lifeless. He made me promise that, if he didn't make it back, I'd carry on without him. I made that promise to him. So, that means I have to do this mission, not for Dr. D, not for myself, but for Mikey.
I stand up and head into the other room. "Let's go" I grab my bag and start heading out before anyone could respond. They soon follow me out though.
As I go to open the driver's side door, Andy stops me "Pete, you're definitely not in the right state to be driving." I'm also too dazed to argue, so I just step back and let him take the driver role. Andy is the calmest out of the four of us, it's probably best that he drives.
"That, and you're our best shooter. If we're heading into Battery, and it goes all Costa Rica, you and Trick will be able to take out anyone." Joe states, as he gets in on the passenger side, leaving Patrick and me to sit in the back. He has a fair point, but entering Battery is far more dangerous than in the zones. Less space to get away and far more dracs. Not to mention that the best four killjoys that ever lived are all dead after entering Battery mere hours ago.
Setting off at dusk, we are relieved to not encounter any dracs on our way into Battery City. We park in a dark alley at the far side of the tunnel. The tunnel we enter through leads to the most deserted area of Battery. Nobody lives on this side, well at least not above ground. One advantage that my crew has over The Fabulous Killjoys is that we were raised in The Underground. Mikey used to call me his "Ritalin Rat" because of it. We can enter Battery through the secret underground tunnels.
"So, we are entering through tunnel 6, but diverting through to 9. It will get us there quicker. Tunnel 13 is the only tunnel that leads to the BL/Ind mortuary. Killjoys have been using that tunnel for years to retrieve the bodies of the fallen." Patrick explains, pulling the tunnel map from his pocket.
I finally manage to speak up, "Trick, we know. We've navigated these tunnels more times than anyone else. I could find each tunnel blindfolded." I don't intend for my words to come out so viciously.
"Pete, I know you're hurting, but there's no need to get so aggressive. He was just clarifying the plan." Andy gives me a sympathetic smile, while also making sure I stay calm. I go to open my mouth to apologise but he cuts in "Don't you dare say sorry. Your mind is like a hurricane right now so you don't need to apologise. Just make sure you're aware of what you say ok?" I nod in response as we begin to exit the van.
The entrance to the underground is located in the walls of the tunnel. You have to knock six times in a sequence. To remember it, we made a joke about Christianity. Knock once for the father, twice for the son, three times for the holy ghost. The door opens and we head down to the underground.
People here know us by completely different aliases than our killjoy ones. In the underground, Patrick is Dr. Benzedrine, Joe is Horse Shoe Crab, Andy is Donnie The Catcher, and I am Mr. Sandman. We adopted our killjoy names when we first joined The Fabulous Killjoys in the desert. The aliases and masks help us stay almost anonymous to anyone from Battery City. We will only share our real names with people that we form strong bonds with.
I remember the day Mikey first told me his real name. I never thought I'd find the name Michael so beautiful until that moment. He laughed at my ridiculously long name, but I didn't mind. His laugh was rare. When he did laugh, it was like music to my ears. I choke back tears at the thought that I'm never going to hear that laugh again.
Patrick stops in front of me, "We're nearly at tunnel 6, but we can take a break if you need." I didn't even notice how far we had gotten cause I was so lost in my own head.
I shake my head immediately "No, we need to do this now. No breaks. I need him home." My voice cracks slightly and the boys all hug me.
"If it's too much for you, we can retrieve them while you stay outside." Joe places a hand on my shoulder. "You're not alone, Sandman. We are here for you." I thank them, and we head towards Tunnel 6.
As I already stated, I could navigate these tunnels blindfolded. We get to Tunnel 13 and the secret entrance to the mortuary fairly quickly. We sneak in, looking around before moving into different sections. Surprisingly there's no guards at all, but we know that Dr. D must have gotten another group to attack nearby as a distraction. He announced to the Young Renegades that he had a mission for them, and we all know how chaotic the two leaders of that crew can get. They are good at distractions, so it's most likely them.
We find the door with the sign saying "Ray Toro, Gerard Way, Frank Iero, Mikey Way." They know their real identities now, and it makes me extremely angry. I feel violated for them. I don't realise how long I've been standing at the door until Patrick speaks up "You don't have to go in, you can stay here if you want to."
"I have to do this. I need to do this. For him." I push open the door and we step into the room. It's cold and dark, a huge contrast to the hot desert. Four tables are lined up with the body bags on them, names written on cards placed on each bag. But the bags are empty.
"Why are they empty?" Joe questions, looking at the name cards. "They were definitely in these bags."
"I can answer that." Patrick holds up a folder. "Medical records. As a medic, it was my first instinct to read any records that may be held." He hands me a piece of paper. "Take a breath before reading."
I take a deep breath and look at the paper. I start reading out loud. "Gerard Way, by the alias of Party Poison, Frank Iero, by the alias of Fun Ghoul, Ray Toro, by the alias of Jet Star, and Mikey Way, by the alias of Kobra Kid are all to be destroyed TONIGHT." My hands begin to shake. "You don't think they've already..." I can't even finish my sentence. My throat closes up. I can't bring him home. I can't bring either of them home.
I immediately break down into sobs. Andy and Joe leave the room to stand guard. This time Patrick can be in the room alone with me. I'm too weak to turn on him now. "I'm so sorry, Psycho." I know he wishes he could use my real name, but in missions he must refer to me by my alias. "We can still retrieve their clothes. We can put their masks and guns in the postbox." He gestures to the jackets, masks, and guns in the corner.
My instinct kicks in, making me go over and pick up Mikey's jacket. I hold it close to me. "It still smells like him." I force a smile. I don't know why but I suddenly start pouring my whole heart out. "I didn't know how I was gonna react to seeing him dead. I wanted to remember him as I last saw him, before the mission. My last memory of him being us telling each other that we loved each other. But now, now that he's definitely gone, I kinda wish I did see him dead. Just so I could see him one last time. Hold his hand one last time. Kiss him goodbye, and know it was the last time. Maybe then I would be able to let go, but now I don't think I ever will."
I take a breath, reaching into my pocket for a small box, "I was gonna ask him to marry me. I stole this on our last looting mission." I open the box to reveal a platinum ring. "I also stole a second one for myself." Patrick looks at me sympathetically, but also slightly confused. "I know we don't do weddings in the zones, but I wanted to feel an even stronger connection to him. That was the only way I could think of. I was gonna ask him before the mission, but I held off. I should have done it there and then, then he would have died knowing I wanted him to be mine forever." I fiddle with the ring in my hand "I wanted to place the ring on his finger before we buried him, so we'd be connected, even in death." I place the ring back into the box, then back into my pocket. Patrick moves over to sit with me in the corner, he throws an arm around me. He gestures for me to carry on "He was my world, Punk. I couldn't see my future without him in it. But now I'm living that future without him in it."
I cry into his shoulder for a little bit until Joe bursts in. "I'm so sorry, Psycho, but we've gotta go now. Volcano and I just heard some dracs heading this way" Patrick and I are on alert in seconds. All four of us immediately grab the Killjoys' rayguns, and add them to our holsters, as we take out our own rayguns. I throw all the clothes and masks into a nearby bag, and we make a run for the tunnel.
We make it to the van, and head back out to the zones. I cry all the way back, hugging Mikey's jacket like it's some magical item that could bring him back. I take in his scent, reminding me of when we said goodbye, not knowing it would be forever. When we get to the diner, it's much more quiet than usual. No Frank running around causing chaos. No Gerard trying to get him to calm down. No casual conversation between Joe and Ray about afros and guitars. And worst of all, no Mikey to hold as I cry myself to sleep that night. Only his jacket and a mind full of memories.