Chapter Text
Fuck the day the status quo and any stupid pecking order were created. It is these things that keep any of us from expressing our true selves. Why am I complaining about this crap? My name is Andy Biersack, I’m 16 and a sophomore in high school, and I’m in love with the most popular guy in school. Only problem? I’m the little outcast goth kid trying to make a band, and he is the most wanted, the most popular guy at my pathetic school.
I slam my locker as my dangerous thoughts come out again. I slink through the halls to the last hour of the day, awaiting the moment to escape this hell. The only good thing about this hour is he’s in it and since I sit behind him, I can glimpse at him without him knowing. I do that than pay attention to the teacher, because, I mean, come on. School is the last thing on my mind when I have a bigger future in my sight.
I slip into the room, just as the tardy bell rings, and slide into my seat, relatively unnoticed. Well, almost unnoticed, as I was assaulted with a horde of paper balls. All coming from the idiot juniors in front of me, and their imbecile ring leader, Matt, who sat and laughed like a hyena. The bastard has been making my life in school a living hell, as he sees me as the weakest kid in the jungle of a school. I’m not weak; I just choose not to stir up shit with the damn pecking order. Besides, all my band mates would kick my ass if I tried.
“Watch, as the pathetic goth tries to get away from the jocks. Fat chance.” Matt sneered, earning laughs from his lackeys and anyone else around him. He was second in command at this school, so, he had the second most amount of attention here, and I end up being the butt of his taunts and jokes every day. I rolled my eyes, pulling out my green, ratty, old notebook of my bag and pulled out a pen. I started to scribble down more chunks of lyrics of a song me and the guys would try and play later. We almost have our second song written, and Jinxx and Jake were working on the guitar parts already.
I was so focused on writing my lyrics; I barely noticed class starting and him walking in the room. Not that I pay attention in the class; it was Geometry for crying out loud. I hated math with a damn passion and just being in the same room as him was the reason I didn’t stab someone. Like I said, I was so focused on my writing; I didn’t hear the teacher call my name. Until Scout, a girl I was sort of friends with, hit me up top the head. I snapped my head up, and looked around. Mrs. Finch, our teacher, had a disapproving scowl on her face, which meant I was in some deep shit.
“Mr. Biersack, this is Geometry, not English. Put the blasted notebook away and pay attention. Mr. Purdy, will you please explain to the class the answer to this problem?” She asked Ashley Purdy, the most popular guy in our school, who answered like a dutiful student. He was the star student in any teacher’s eyes, unlike me, who was the bane of their existence. Maybe that was one of the reason I felt such towards him. But, it was unrequited love, since he was popular, and I was nobody. The reason I watched from afar and kept my feeling and inner turmoils to myself.
Ignoring the snickers coming from the section via jock, I pulled out my notebook again, and continued to blissfully ignore the teachers droning voice. I just let the lyrics flow out of me and appear on the page, filling it with the feelings I was feeling.
‘Never gonna change my mind/’
‘We can leave it all behind/’
‘Nothings gonna stop us/’
‘No, not this time/’
‘So, take your hand in mine/’
‘It’s our tonight/’
‘This is a rebel love song/’
For some reason, these lyrics spoke mountains about the love I held inside of me. It was like the words were trying to personify what emotions I trapped deep down inside of me. I closed my notebook and held it in my lap and shut my eyes. This is exactly what I felt, what relationship I craved; a rebellious one. Too bad only movies have happy endings and mine would just be another untold story.
I jerked my head up as the bell rang, signaling the end of school. I sighed, collecting all my stuff from my desk and quickly heading to my locker. I wanted to get out of here before I lose what control I had on my emotions. I open my locker, and caught the black wire mirror that almost fell out. I know it’s not normal for a guy to have a mirror in his locker. I really don’t give a flying fuck. I wear makeup, and I like to make sure it’s not smudge or running, so I don’t look like a fucking retarded raccoon.
I put it back up, shut my locker, and bolted for the door. I had to run to get to my car, and take off for home. The guys were coming over for a lyric and jam session in my basement. I drove a little faster, trying to get home as soon as possible. I was thankful it was Friday and I had a weekend to write and hang with my future band mates.
My alarm rang as loud and shrill as possible, telling to get my lazy ass out of bed. It was Monday morning, and I felt like utter shit. I spent all weekend working on songs, and working with the guys on rhythms, riffs, ect, ect. That also meant little to almost no sleep for me. I had written almost three pages of lyrics for the bit I started last Friday. Jinxx started on some guitar, while CC was messing with the drum beats. Jake was helping me and Jinxx. We didn’t have a bass player yet, so I would end up trying to come up with that myself later.
I rolled out of bed, and scrambled around for some clothes. This ended up being a pair of my black skinny jeans, a ripped KISS tank and black arm warmers, even though it was November. I stumbled into my bathroom; attempting to fix the rats nest I called my hair. After I had managed that, I went to work on my makeup, which took like ten minutes. Compared to my hair which took a fucking forty minutes to tame and style.
With all this done and over with, I headed to school, even though I wanted to crawl back into bed and sleep. I forced myself to stay awake as I drove the five minutes to school. I somehow ended up being early, which was a first. Surprisingly, I was the first one to show up. I always came to school late, no matter what day or type of weather. I parked my car and walked to the stair in front of the doors, sitting down near a pillar. I was out of sight, so I thought I was safe from the jocks who loved to go “Goth Hunting”. I was wrong as hell.
I was suddenly grabbed and pushed against the stone pillar I was leaning against. I was dazed for a moment, and when my vision cleared, I was stunned by who my assaulter was. Ashley Purdy, the #1 kid at our school, was the one holding me by my tank collar. His eyes were hard as stone, and had a pissed look hiding in them.
“You just have to torture me, don’t ya?” He growled, his grip tightening on my shirt. I was a little taken aback, even frighten, by this. I never saw this kid get mean, or angry with anyone.
“What are you talking about?” I shouted, struggling, trying to get away from him before he rearranged my face. I had no doubt in my mind that he could do it, either.
“Walking around, dressed like that! Taunting me, and everyone, with your bloody flawless skin and fucking perfect body. On a normal day, it’s bad enough, but then you have to go and dress like this” He snapped, pushing his body up against mine, and this freaked me out even more.
“Why the hell do you care? I’m nobody, god damnit! You barely know I even exist, you asshole. So, let me fucking go!” I shouted, squirming like mad to get my body away from his. He growled like an animal, and pushed his body even closer to mine. I was practically flat against the pillar and couldn’t move any more than an inch.
“You have no fucking idea how much I want you. Ever since you moved to this school, I’ve been fixated on you. Your flawless skin, your beautiful hair, your damn perfect body. You don’t know how much it tore me apart that I couldn’t date you because it would be ‘wrong’.” He snarled, his face inches from mine, and my breath came out in gasps. It was impossible for me not to feel attracted to him like this. Another reason I wanted him, and because of the closeness, I was having a hard time thinking.
“I fucking doubt it. You barely look at me, and you laugh along with your little jock buddies every time I’m the butt of their god damn joke. Don’t fucking lie to me, just to string me along to get a good laugh.” I hissed at him. He forced his face even closer to mine, which I didn’t think was possible at the moment.
“I hate doing that to you! If it wasn’t for the scholarships and collage shit riding on my sports performances, I would have already been at your side. I have to fight the urge to go and protect you from the assholes I have to call ‘friends’. I’ve been through hell everytime I had to watch you get the shit kicked out of you. I’ve been in love with you since I saw you and I’m such a bastard that I can’t protect the one I fucking love.” He sighed angrily, resting his forehead against mine.
“You..love me?” I whispered, tilting my eyes up to look at him. He was like six inches taller than me, and this position didn’t make it any better. I watched him open his eyes and look at me, his hazel eyes boring into my icy blue ones. His lips twisted into a smirk and then, suddenly, I felt his lips on mine. I stood there for a second, before melting into his kiss. I push myself into him as he deepened the kiss and wrapped my arms around his neck. Ashley pulled back and smiled, before dropping his head.
“You idiot. How could I not? You’re the most genuine kid at this hell hole school. And I wish you could be all mine.” He whispered into my shoulder, where he had laid his head.
“I can be. We can be together, no one has to know.” I whispered, knowing this idea was stupid as shit and that he wouldn’t agree to it. He lifted his head up, and looked at my face.
“You know what? Screw the status quo. I want you. I want to be able to kiss you whenever I want. To protect you from the bastards I am forced to associate with. To display proudly, and show the world you’re mine and no one can have you.” He said confidently, pulling me into his chest, and wrapping his arms around my too slim body.
“Do you really want to give up what you worked so hard to get?” I asked seriously, pulling back a bit to look at him.
“Yes, I fucking am. The world can go fuck itself. I’m feeling rebellious.” He smirked again, and I looked down. Which had my line of sight at his stomach, and I could see his tattoo. OUTLAW was scrawled across it and I smirked myself. It fit him so well.
“You can be my little rebellious outlaw then.” I said, smirking at him when he raised an eyebrow at me.7
“And you are my rebellious outcast then. And no one is going to change my mind about that.” He said, smiling instead of smirking. He then leaned down, and for the second time that morning, he kissed me. I never wanted it to end. The world can go suck a monkey’s left nut. I had my rebel love now, and that’s all that mattered to me.