Work Text:
Kakashi joins ANBU at 14 after a spectacular fight in Minato sensei’s hokage office. The fight hadn’t been about Kakashi joining ANBU at such a young age despite what some might believe ( nobody in Konoha believes that Kakashi is young for anything though. Kakashi used to take pride in that). It hadn’t actually been about anything really.
Kakashi had stood with his head down in respect for his Hokage ( and most likely because he was too tired to keep it up) while beside him Obito seethed in anger and barely controlled fury and grief. Kakashi wished he would just punch him.
But Minato sensei was still that positive and optimistic loving idiot who believed that his students were good, kind and precious (Kakashi can count one who isn’t. He knows himself quite well) and wouldn’t let Obito do anything. He doesn’t do anything himself either though. Kakashi thinks it’s not a good trait for a Hokage to not do anything at all.
Obito finally snaps at their sensei, “ Why aren’t you doing something! He killed her sensei, I saw it with my own eyes. He killed Rin (angrily while tears fell from his single visible eye) aren’t you going to do anything to punish her killer! Doesn’t she deserve some absolution in death! All these years were you just pretending that you care about us!”
Obito shot words one after another meant to anger Minato and force him into action, to hurt Kakashi just because he wanted Kakashi to feel the agony he himself felt in his heart and his newly acquired three tomoed sharingan.
Minato calmly looked in Obito’s eyes, “ I loved Rin like a little sister to me Obito. I am as affected by her loss as you are. If I don’t cry right here right now it doesn’t mean I wont do it later in the safety of my own home. Right now however I am the Hokage of hidden leaf, I have to think about every single person in this village, I have responsibilities and I have more perspectives to see than you do. (Looking towards his youngest student) Kakashi recounted to T&I that it was Rin who deliberately jumped in front of him when he went to kill an IWA nin with his chidori. (Seeing obito trying to object) it was verified by the Yamanaka that he isn’t lying.”
Obito interrupted not caring about anything else, “ I saw it with my own eye sensei! He killed her. He killed her because she was going to be a threat to konoha in his fucked up mind.”
Minato while replying to Obito this time filled his voice with much more authority and reprimand, “ You saw what Kakashi saw in those moments and nothing else and you have no verification of your claims. Please quite your voice down Obito. Having said that (to Kakashi) Do you really wish to join Black ops kakashi? (Softly) please don’t consider it as a punishment or obligation from me either as hokage or as your sensei. I am giving you a choice here.”
Kakashi bowed his head even lower and Minato didn’t think it could be possible, he hid a sigh behind a small smile, “ I’ll be more than obliged to serve under your command in ANBU Hokage sama”
Well, there goes all the progress they had made in the last three years with Kakashi. Minato looks at the boy, and he’s still just a boy, just 14, the age at which genin are still learning new tricks to show up their comrades in battlefield. And Minato’s decided that this boy is ready for ANBU.
He is. Minato knows that and even if he didn’t know better, the Sandaime and the ANBU commander agreed. So young still.
“ alright then Kakashi. Go and rest some today. You’ll report directly to me tomorrow sharp at 9 in the morning and then be inducted into ANBU”
Kakashi just nodded and bowed and began to take his leave. From the door. It made Minato frown in concern for the boy who loves to use windows and is the reason Minato keeps his open always.
Obito whispered in anger in his former team mate’s direction, his voice filled with malice, grief and anger. Always so much grief.
“ I shouldn’t have saved you that day. Should have saved my eye so that you couldn’t even think of using that cursed Jutsu of yours”
Minato pierced Obito with a glare and the boy turned silent still seething in anger. He huffed and left the space without any other word not even caring when Minato called him back.
Seeing Kakashi standing their silently Minato tried to sooth the boy with his gentle tone, “ Don’t think anything of it Kakashi. You know he loved Rin. Her death and specially seeing it in such a manner without knowing the context has hurt him deeply. He’s in grief and just meaning to hurt you with his words. He doesn’t actually mean any of that Kakashi.”
Kakashi kept standing there without moving or saying a word and Minato, afraid for the health and sanity of the boy began to stand up when he spoke suddenly, “ I understand Hokage sama. I would really appreciate it if you could convey to Obito that I have this eye by his decree alone and he’s liable to take it away at any moment he wishes to do so.”
Minato shook his head vehemently and said with conviction in his voice, “Don’t think about it Kakashi. He wouldn’t do that! It’s a gift to you..he”
“ please just, (softly) let him know sensei” After that Kakashi just waited to sense Minato’s nod and left.
After few minutes of his leaving Obito once again entered the office and Minato looked at his older student and didn’t have the heart to either reprimand him or tell him what Kakashi had asked to convey. He stayed silent waiting for Obito.
“ I would like to Join ANBU as well Minato Sensei” Obito said trying to hide the indecisiveness from his voice in order to sound convinced and confident but Minato’s known these kids for 4 years now. Obito’s heart isn’t meant for ANBU like his own isn’t and Kushina’s isn’t.
Moreover Minato knew that this was coming. ANBU for a lot of shinobi is a stepping stone and if Kakashi is going to embark on that journey then how can Obito accept being left behind?
But obito was not being left behind. He was being spared. Obito is the image that his love wants to see in their unborn child and Minato would preserve it at any cost.
That cost apparently like many, he’s decided is going to be Kakashi.
He says slowly, his voice conveying his own resolution, “ No Obito. I am not going to allow that for you ( seeing obito meaning to interrupt) You are going to Train with me and spend time with me researching and seeing me work while not on your regular Jounin missions so that you can be ready whenever your time comes of becoming hokage.”
“Sensei…” Obito whispered not being able to say in words what he truly wanted to convey to his sensei. His relief and his grief alike.
Minato finally stood up from his position and marched to Obito and without a word hugged the boy tightly to his chest. Obito’s silent cries muffled in his chest and tears from his single eye dampening his hokage garb. But Minato doesn’t care. He can do this for Obito and he would, for Kakashi he’ll have to work harder.
“ we’ll get through this Obito. I promise. And we’ll fulfil the promise you made to Rin together. Also we are going to help Kakashi get through this (tightening his arms around the boy feeling him becoming tensed and angry) He isn’t at fault obito, but you’ll understand and forgive him with time. I know it. You have a big heart Obito and a burning will of fire, I don’t want to see it getting trampled in ANBU”
Both stayed silent on the unsaid matter of whether they wanted Kakashi’s spirit to darken in ANBU then? The answer will always be no but right now Minato needed somewhere for Kakashi where he’ll be able to keep an eye on the boy while also providing his grief and anger an outlet. Kakashi’s always worked his emotions through training and missions after all.
After that little moment between the sensei turned Hokage and the lost Uchiha both separated and Minato ordered his former student to take the day off and report back to duty the next day. Today all of them would spend grieving and shedding the last of their tears because tomorrow as is a Shinobi’s life they had to move forward.
In the other side of the village in the cemetery,
“Hey Rin, hmm…I am sorry I haven’t been here to see you earlier. It’s no excuse but the T&I wouldn’t let me go without full interrogation and it took a long time. Your peers at the hospital wouldn’t give me any painkillers so the recovery took a bit more time. Obito blames me as well you know. He’s right like many others so I don’t really mind. It’s really weird though how he only saw you at that moment and not before. Well I just have a few minutes before Obito comes back here. Minato sensei doesn’t blame me though. He’s always had high opinion of me, he’s a fool. He asked me to join black ops though so now I’ll be Joining ANBU from tomorrow. I’ll try and visit as often as i’ll be able to. Although I don’t think you’ll be lonely much with Obito and sensei visiting you.”
Feeling the distinctive chakra of his former team-mate Kakashi quickly masked his own chakra completely, without the sharingan Obito is a bad sensor. He then quickly wrapped up his talk with Rin.
“ just this I guess for today. Next time whenever I visit I’ll tell you some stuff about ANBU whatever I am allowed to anyways. Got to leave now. Obito’s here to cry at you. Take care of him Rin. (Softly) he wouldn’t let me.”
Kakashi left after that. Hid body already aching from the time spent in absolute tense condition with Minato sensei and from all the investigations, mind breach, chakra exhaustion, injuries he has gone through in 2 weeks since Rin died. He still hasn’t had a moment to himself to grieve and he supposed he didn’t really deserve it. Just 2 weeks and it already feels like Kakashi has aged up years.
Like he aged when father had committed suicide. It’s always his fault after all. Then he hadn’t been enough for his father to hang onto and now he wasn’t strong enough to protect Rin.
Lost in his thoughts Kakashi didn’t really pay any attention to his surroundings but having the instincts of an active duty shinobi carved in his heart since he was just a child Kakashi’s body carried him through Konoha and its numerous intersecting streets to the Jounin Barracks where Kakashi lived in his little apartment. He’ll most likely be shifting to ANBU dorms, there’s nothing in here that ever made it seem like home anyways. That’ll have to come later though, right now he just wants some sleep.
He doesn’t get a whole lot of it as is par for the course these days. His sleep as it has been since Rin’s death plagued with nightmares.
He resorts to sitting on his futon with his arms wrapped tightly around his knees. It feels like getting a hug and Kakashi feels nothing as the pain from his arms where his finger nails are digging negates what he’s feeling inside.
In the last 3 years he had gotten too complacent. Developing and nurturing his friendships with Obito, Rin and even Gai. Going on lunches and dinners along with Minato sensei and Kushina san. It had felt like having a family, a home.
But hatake are cursed he shouldn’t have forgotten. Every last one of them had lost every single person they loved the most. His father lost his mother and even though Kakashi had been there he wasn’t enough.
It didn’t matter anyways. They were just tools. They were meant to serve the village to the best of their abilities or more and die trying some day.
Kakashi just has to do a bit more, give a lot more effort to atone for his sins. For being the White Fang’s son who started the war.
Bastard. Disgraced.
For taking Obito’s eye and leaving him behind thinking he was dead.
Sharingan thief Kakashi
For killing Rin.
Friend killer Kakashi.
He’ll atone for all his mistakes and serve Konoha. Make Minato sensei proud of him again and may be Obito will come around as well when he would know that Kakashi wouldn’t let anyone in his squad die. Not again. Not ever.
He puts a palm over his left eye which has started tearing up again. Kakashi is not sure whether it’s faulty transplantation or just Obito’s genes acting up. He presses his palm tightly over it. Obito doesn’t need Kakashi to see the future for him and he wouldn’t anyways want to see whatever Kakashi would end up getting into in ANBU.
Nobody, not his ANBU squad, neither Obito, nor Minato sensei for even once see Obito’s eye reflecting red in Kakashi’s head. His tilted Hitai-ate an ever present accessory of Kakashi’s and his name of Sharingan no Kakashi just becoming that. A moniker and nothing else.
Kakashi’s first mission in ANBU was a low level S-rank that even a capable Jounin could easily complete. But kakashi didn’t mind, he was happy to have been sent on a mission as it is. Besides showing obedience to his less capable leader is easier on a low level mission which goes bounds in making him easier to deal with in future.
Minato sensei just shakes his head with what kakashi thinks is a fond expression when his squad leader recounts the mission details and his feedback about his newest team member. It’s sobering to know that Minato sensei understands him so well.
Their next mission is a level higher but Kakashi is more than able to twist around orders without seeming too suspicious. This time Minato sensei gives him an amused look.
After next 2 missions Kakashi is asked by their commander if he would like a squad of his own and Kakashi agrees wholeheartedly but after a drawn out moment, his team captain taking a deep sigh beside him. Both more than happy to be rid of each other.
It’s around then that he understands why Obito’s been following Kushina-san like a shadow. She’s pregnant and they are afraid of the consequences of the pregnancy on the seal that’s holding the kyubi.
Kakashi confronts Minato sensei about it, confused about his sensei’s decision and part in this.
“ don’t you think that you should have waited a bit sensei(pointedly) with Kushina san?”
Minato sputters at his student’s entirely unexpected question. Kakashi speaks so less these days, their only conversations beside the usual reports limited to the time kakashi spends picking up the scroll for his next mission. And occasionally when Minato offers to visit Rin together. So this line of conversation is too bizarre for him.
Moreover, Kakashi is fourteen what does he know about these things?
“ I have read Icha icha. It’s a good book” Kakashi informs his sensei solemnly like he hasn’t just blown Minato’s head off and doomed Jiraiya.
“What? Did Jiraiya sensei give it to you? What wait?”
“ well of course. The last time he visited. I think you should have waited before attempting conception at least to research for a more potent seal for the kyubi”
Minato’s not really sure on what to focus his remaining brain cells at. On Kakashi’s apparent knowledge about conception through Jiraiya’s adult! Books or his student’s apparent lack of tact when practically telling his sensei off for having a child rather than congratulating him.
“ what are you saying Kakashi?” He asks tiredly instead.
Kakashi shrugs nonchalantly but from the tension in his slouching shoulders (and when did that happen?) Minato knows that he wants to say allot on the topic so he prompts the boy further,
“ well?”
“I just think that you and Kushina-san should have waited before anything. Or perhaps terminate now, that you are aware of the risk it posses.” Kakashi says waving his hand around in a casual manner.
Minato raises an eyebrow and asks softly, “ you mean to say that we should kill our unborn child because it’s too risky?”
“That’s not what I meant sensei. It’s just not conducive to current circumstances seeing your new post and the still undergoing port war repairs.” Kakashi replies in a more subdued manner this time.
Minato looks at Kakashi and he is unable to reconcile the little boy he saw playing with wild puppies once with the boy currently advising him to kill his own child.
“I have got Obito on her protection detail. You don’t really need to worry about it Kakashi. It was meant to be a secret anyways, I told you because I thought I had share my happiness with you. I am really sorry that you are unable to do that.” Minato tells the boy softly. His voice filled with grief for the little boy who used to come to his hip and fall asleep on his knee. Whom Minato had once thought, almost too long ago about adopting himself.
“I…I am happy for you sensei. It just doesn’t seem very practical to me” Kakashi says not willing to apologise for his comment but knowing well that he had overstepped some imaginary social boundary.
Minato smiles softly at the boy and nods before saying, already so tired so early in the day, “ that’s alright Kakashi. Let me and Kushina worry about our own child. (Hesitantly) you were leaving?”
Kakashi nods and with a bow leaves the office.
“That bastard”
Minato groans hearing the newly gruff voice of his teen apprentice.
“Obito” he says tiredly trying to infuse as much reprimand in it as he’s able. Which is apparently not sufficient considering he feels the same actually because Obito just scoffs and pushes himself from the wall and comes to sit in front of Minato.
“ you know I am right, right? That Baka just has too long a stick stuck up his ass and you are doing nothing to dislodge it”
Minato groans louder this time, Kakashi’s conversation still too fresh in his mind, “when did you guys grow up so much to use innuendoes and language like this? Where are my sweet little genin?” he asks mourning the loss.
“ well I have been spending quite a lot of time with Kushina-chan. She has very colourful language” Obito points out to his sensei happily.
Minato groans and finally gives in to the tempting action of banging his head on his desk.
Obito grins at his dramatic sensei, feeling light. However much he misses the high of going on real dangerous missions outside the village, this mission of guarding Kushina chan while she’s pregnant has been a boon for Obito.
He loves Kushina-chan like an older sister, she’s always supported him more than anyone else ever did. Not even Rin or Minato sensei in the early days when they were too blinded by Kakashi’s skills.
So looking after her and her unborn child makes Obito feel happy and content in a way he hasn’t felt since Rin’s death.
Kakashi’s paranoia be damned. Obito would protect that child with everything he has in him.
Kakashi is 15 and he feels like he should have died long ago. He’s 15 and he doesn’t have a home to go to because his father had said home is where someone you love resides. Kakashi is 15 and the tree branch from where he’s seeing Obito and Minato sensei spar is the only home he’s known in quite some time.
He falls asleep there. The branch digging in his back and his former team mates voices loud in his ears. It resembles comfort.
The comfort and peace doesn’t last for long as he is startled awake by a kunai thrown at his head. He immediately diverts it with a shuriken and looks around, already alert and ready for action when he finally hears the familiar voice,
“ Obito! I told you to wake him up not launch an attack on him!”
“ he deflected didn’t he?”
“ Obito…” the reprimand clear in their sensei’s voice makes Kakashi smile so softly that his mask shifts even though his eye doesn’t crinkle.
“ alright alright. (Teasingly) don’t be so mad old man”
Minato sputters at his student and Kakashi seeing them from his position on the tree feels something tighten inside him. He misses these interactions. These little squabbles that seemed so troublesome then.
He misses Minato sensei’s supportive heavy hand on his head and he misses Obito’s fingers winding around his own which always made him feel so warm in his chest.
“ hey! What are you doing here anyways kakashi, were you sleeping on the job?” Obito asks suspiciously.
“ I did deflect your kunai didn’t i? A shinobi is never off duty.” As soon as he says that, even without seeing he could have guessed the epic eye roll obito gave and the disappointed but fond expression on Minato sensei’s face. Kakashi suspects Minato sensei feels fond because of obito though.
After his confrontation with Minato sensei last month they haven’t had their weekly visits to Rin or simply small tea chats. It could be because Kakashi’s been on back to back missions since then. But Minato sensei always took time out to visit Rin with Kakashi before.
It feels like Kakashi’s lost something yet again. It’s a familiar feeling and Kakashi’s trying to make himself understand that he deserves it because of all his sins and mistakes.
“Oye Kakashi, don’t just brag about rules sitting there, lets spar if you really wanna see my abilities with a kunai.” Obito shouted even though there’s no need for that with Kakashi’s sharp hearing.
Kakashi tilts his head, he’s more shocked than actually considering the offer. They haven’t sparred together since Rin’s death. There’s no option here.
Kakashi nods from his perch and drops down gracefully. His body even more lithe than ever before owing to his time with ANBU.
Minato sensei looks at him and says softly, “ hey Kakashi, you seem pretty tired. Aren’t you on mandatory leave because of your previous back to back missions?”
Kakashi gives his sensei a smile that crinkles his eye, “ I am fine sensei. (Looking at Obito and taking a bored stance with his hands in his pant pockets) standard rules sensei?”
Minato sensei takes a bit analysing kakashi and finding Kakashi isn’t really injured and might just only be exhausted from travelling nods while reminding his students, “ only Taijutsu for the first round. Then if it extends beyond 15 minutes, you are allowed ninjutsu. No heavy moves though” he warns strictly directing his gaze towards Kakashi.
Kakashi feels a sharp stab like pain in his heart at Minato sensei’s look but like every insult, every name he’s ever been called, every disgusting look he’s ever been given, he takes it in stride and nods towards his sensei.
Obito gives his former team-mate a smirk, carrying deep anger in his kind eyes, and says focusing his singular gaze on kakashi, “ prepare to be plundered Kakashi!”
Kakashi takes his stance across his friend and resolves giving this his best. Obito deserves nothing less after all. Even in his stance and his words Kakashi can see the difference in his once best friend.
On Minato sensei’s signal they both begin.
For 15 minutes they indulge in taijutsu, trying to land hits on each other. Kakashi however nimble and lithe lacks the strength and bulk Obito’s built up. So they match one to one. Obito’s hits landing harder and harder though not as frequent as kakashi’s.
He’ll surely be sporting a good many bruises tomorrow but it’ll be worth it. Kakashi smiles at obito as they enter a lock and manages to see the anger in Obito’s eyes being replaced by confusion. They both jump back to create distance.
Minato sensei shouts from the side “ 15 minutes are up! You can now use ninjutsu”
As soon as Minato sensei says that a smirk replaces the confusion and exhaustion from Obito’s face. He seems to stand up straighter. Kakashi observes this and tilts his head thinking that obito clearly has learned some new tricks if he’s so confident about this.
Kakashi shrugs, he’s known obito since the academy and knows he always reverts to using his fire affinity which is easy for kakashi to get around, he’s also aware that Obito’s been unable to create a jutsu of his own which he and sensei had been working on together previously, before Rin. Kakashi realises he can divide his life into Before and After Rin time periods. It’s not as funny as it could be.
Kakashi decided it’s better if he stays on defensive to see what obito has up his sleeve.
So they both come at a standstill as Kakashi waits for Obito to show whatever new he’s learned and Obito just keeps standing still, smirking in kakashi’s direction. After a bit obito bored, throws a fire dragon jutsu at kakashi which is easily parted.
Minato sensei huffs a sigh from the sidelines and edges his students to start the match because he has to leave soon.
So both of them come at a silent agreement and begin their attacks with all their might. Kakashi enters a series of jutsu and taijutsu he’s sure will land a hit on obito but it fails and kakashi is left confused. Obito grins at him cheekily.
Just to test his theory kakashi throws a blur of shuriken and kunai at obito following them with another series of taijutsu. He misses all his sure hits yet again.
Kakashi frowns and thinks at his sparring partner, “ are you somehow, phasing through those attacks obito?”
“What attack Kakashi?” Obito teases.
Kakashi tilts his head and without another word both enter in yet another set of moves.
By the end of it obito is smirking although he looks a little winded while Kakashi looks more irritated and confused than before. Obito is using his sharingan. Because it’s not any Jutsu that Kakashi’s seen before and he’s seen and learned about many. That’s why Kakashi understands now that Obito places a palm over his eye clearly to alleviate the ache from using it so much.
Obito sees his observing him and shouts in his direction clearly pricked about something, “ oye Kakashi! Don’t go easy on me you idiot. Use the sharingan if you really wanna do something here.”
Kakashi tilts his head and denies the request softly, “ I’ll pass. It exhausts a lot of my chakra and I would like to see more of your ability obito. (Wonderingly) is it from your mangekyo?”
Obito clenches his fist tightly angry that Kakashi would refuse to use his sharingan against him which just means Kakashi is taking him lightly and Obito doesn’t want that.
Once again they enter into a flurry of attacks. Obito landing hits after hits on Kakashi, nothing fatal but badly bruising sure. It satisfies something inside Obito’s heart.
“Hmmm…you phase through attacks but you have to become solid to land one. It’s a pretty decent ability.” Kakashi acknowledges wiping a drop of blood from his lips. The adrenaline rush from their most recent attack making him feel giddy. Plus he’s figured out Obito’s ability finally and he has a plan of action in mind.
“ you are wasting it being just a Jounin however, you’ll be quite useful with infiltration, information gathering, surprise attacks and assassinations of course. Ibiki’s training for that.”
MInato sensei who’s been enjoying the spar until earlier when obito grew more aggressive as Kakashi kept evading him through new tactics interrupts with an angry reprimand, “ stop that Kakashi.”
Kakashi just shrugs and with a series of hand seals moves towards obito yet again.
This time however the difference is every hit kakashi makes connects with obito, every intended punch, shuriken or kunai grazes him.
Kakashi conveys as they both jump apart after coming at a standstill yet again, “ the longer you are using your mangekyo the more you are getting fatigued. (Obito growls at him and means to move forward when Kakashi puts his hand up slowly) I however forfeit here. I no longer have the stamina to go on. (Smiling at obito widely) that’s something quite amazing obito (teasingly) though quite cowardly.”
Obito bristles and then shrugs and without thinking returns with a barb of his own as had become habit among them, it just comes out sharper that he intended, “ just wanted to have something for when you decided to use chidori on me.”
Minato gasps a sharp, “ Obito!”
And Obito replies in a churlish way that’s become routine now but never before, “ what? Didn’t you help me with it sensei?”
Minato wants to reply, wants to clear the air but Kakashi beats him to it. The boy wrings his arms and then as gracefully as he had before, he replaces his hands in his pant pockets,
“ mah, it’s quite understandable with my history I suppose. Good spar though. Gotta get going”
In the next moment Kakashi has shunshined away from the place and Minato directs an angry glare towards Obito, he doesn’t want kakashi to be even more isolated than before but all recent events and kakashi’s comments have made it quite clear that perhaps Kakashi joining ANBU had been too right a decision but from another perspective entirely.
The boy is excelling there. No doubt. He’s seen lord Danzou eyeing Kakashi whenever he’s been on his guard duty and it always sparks a kind of possessive and protective feeling in him that makes him inevitably snap at Danzou’s forever violent ideas.
Minato sighs. Even though he does possess the power of making Kakashi resign from the ANBU he doesn’t think it’ll be a good decision after all. However much the boy might be an introvert or of prickly nature he’s quite well respected among his peers and has even managed to make some friends from what Minato hears during the briefings from other ANBU.
Minato sighs and rakes his hand through his unruly locks, they are getting long yet again.
“ you are too kind towards him sensei. If he doesn’t understand that that fucking technique needs to go then he won’t leave it alone and keep killing comrades with it.” Obito remarks at him and Minato wonders why he even allows his former students to lecture him?
“ I don’t think it’s necessary obito. He hasn’t deliberately killed a comrade with it anyways. (Eyeing obito with a neutral expression) besides I think it’s safe unless you are going to take your eye back.”
“What the f..(Minato eyes him darkly so Obito groans and shows a hand for peace) hell sensei. Of course I am not. It was meant to be a gift and I am not going to take it back after I fought my entire clan over that decision. Hearing “ we told you so’s” from those pretentious bastards is not in my bucket list. By the way sensei he killed Rin having my sharingan with him.”
Minato sighs and wonders why his students are so emotionally compromised that accepting their care for each other is such a big deal.
“ you have to forgive him sometime Obito.”
“ I can’t sensei. T..that image is burned behind my retina and whenever I look at him I can see Rin dying and blue lightning flashing around her.”
“ it wasn’t his fault obito”
“ he’s the only one apart from myself I can punish sensei. Rin was ours to protect and he failed. We failed.”
After that Obito uses his newly developed Kamui and vanishes from there. An ability he had clearly hidden in his fight with Kakashi.
Minato is left alone and wondering when he would be able to pick up the pieces of his remaining team. Whether he’ll ever be or not.
He thinks of Kushina and their growing child. Of Kushina’s love for Obito and her hesitance about Kakashi’s ANBU status.
He thinks of the little boy he swore to protect when he found the little guy sleeping beside his father’s grave-stone.
He thinks of the team he cherished, loved and felt proud of with his whole heart. He remembers Obito entering konoha borders, closed off with wet cheeks with a dead Rin in his arms.
He remembers Kakashi, almost dead from chakra exhaustion and shock readily accepting the punch Obito directed at him.
Since that fateful day nothing has been okay but Minato thinks they are moving towards being okay again. It was Obito who had suggested the sparring session. It was Kakashi who had readily accepted defeat rather than continuing the fight to a terrible end.
Minato is beginning to light the fire of hope yet again.
It had all been for nothing though. The fire of hope extinguishes with the death of bright yellow and burning Red of konoha.
As they are taken away motionless and dead, the fire inside Kakashi dies too. He leaves the space without looking back. He doesn’t deserve Obito’s friendship, never did. It’s for Obito’s own good that the last connection between them is gone and hence they are both now free of any obligations. That day Kakashi turns to darkness that lingers in shadows of Konoha and doesn’t return.
However, As they are taken away motionless and dead, as the man Obito recognises from that spark of chakra vanishes into shadows yet again, Obito finds a will of fire, a brand new spark in his sensei’s and Kushina-chan’s stead. Their legacy. The orange little Bright light of Naruto burning like Konoha’s sun and obito hopes. Hopes for a better future. That day he promises he won’t let that burning orange fire extinguish ever.
Kakashi spends his 16th year oscillating between ROOT and ANBU. His heart too damaged and his blood boiling with rage. In the end he’s able to choose a path for himself but he’s not able to forget that he possesses such darkness within himself.
Obito keeps busy learning to take care of a young child and doing missions simultaneously while overcoming his own grief.
Those years are particularly hard and yet awakening for the two young shinobi.
Tenzou is just a boy, the same age as kakashi when he had joined ANBU but has been training for far longer under ROOT. Kakashi feels a connection with that boy who has never belonged anywhere. Who’s always been considered a poor imitation of someone, something desirable. Who’s always just been a tool.
Kakashi wants Tenzou to not be a tool. To be someone good, someone human on whom comrades would be able to rely on and wouldn’t hesitate to go back for. He spends the year he turns 17 training a Kouhai in everything he knows and in things he never bothered to care about. Tenzou is a much better person than Kakashi ever would be and somewhere Kakashi feels proud of that assessment. It’s also the first time in ANBU that kakashi becomes afraid of losing someone and not just because they are a comrade and their life is kakashi’s responsibility but because Kakashi has formed an attachment. What can he say, being called Senpai is a wonderful experience.
When Kakashi is due to turn 18 he hears Asuma and Gai discussing about a surprise birthday party and immediately puts in a request for a solo mission. Sandaime has been known to enjoy playing with his ANBU and sometimes lets Asuma and Gai tag along for milder missions.
Somehow both of them frequently end up with Kakashi’s unit making him feel frustrated and irritated (And not so much alone). It’s a bother.
So he puts in the request as sandaime’s new assistant glares at him, it’s Umino Iruka and Kakashi doesn’t mind. Iruka terrorises ANBU on a daily basis with his pranks. Kakashi (or rather hound) finds him quite amusing (and imaginative!) and they both are constantly on each other’s throats.
Kakashi doesn’t know any other way to interact with a potential friend. Not that he wants to be friends.
“Hound san it’s your 3rd solo mission request this month” Iruka points out unnecessarily, a touch of annoyance mixed in with concern in his voice. It’s the reason Kakashi likes Iruka and wants to stay away at the same time.
“ Maah, Umino San, you know how it is.” Kakashi doesn’t give any further explanation and Iruka gives him a look that promises future pranks.
“ let me remind you then, it’s your last request for this month. You will not be allowed to put any more solo mission requests for another month” Iruka begins to fill a form meticulously as Kakashi waves his hand.
He’s not worried about the threat. IT’s very rare for even ANBU to volunteer for solo missions and Kakashi’s known in the ranks to have gone on quite a lot successful ones. One way or another they fall on him anyways. It’s just about the timing of it.
Although it’s quite fun to see Iruka bristling and murmuring about it.
Kakashi is unable to help his fond smile. Iruka is a breath of fresh air in kakashi’s blood scented life. It makes the ache in his chest where Rin, Minato sensei and Obito reside bearable.
After minato sensei’s death Obito and Kakashi have only drifted further apart. Obito busy with raising a young child despite being only 16 and never having had parents himself and Kakashi pouring all his grief and anger into his missions. He was made the captain of team Rho that year.
Gai, who somehow knew about the change in status of kakashi’s standing despite it being a confidential thing had visibly been upset about it and proceeded to pester Kakashi to leave ANBU. Kakashi had feigned ignorance while worrying that Gai would leave, constantly.
Gai hadn’t and Kakashi hadn’t left either and they had just moved on because they both are fools apparently. Specially Gai. Unlike Obito.
Obito who never moved on from Rin’s death (much like Kakashi), who never could forgive him ( like Kakashi) and who lived his life ignoring kakashi’s existence in every way possible.
Kakashi thought of his own existence as merely being a tool for village as well. So yeah, Obito’s always had a good judgement about people.
Celebrating a tool’s birthday is just a waste of valuable time, energy, money and skill. They’ll be better off on a mission or at home relaxing before another. Kakashi would make sure that his friends don’t waste their rare free time and money earned through life threatening mission on a thief/killer/tool.
“Hound san?”
Kakashi is brought out of his morbid (practical) thoughts when Iruka calls for him. It seems like he had been calling for a while.
Kakashi rakes a hand through his hair and says in a bored way, apology laced in his tone, “ mah, you are so impatient Umino san. Are you that eager to send me on a mission?”
Kakashi pouts behind his mask even though Iruka can’t see him. He looks up after signing the papers Iruka had passed and the expression on Iruka’s face leaves him short of any word.
Iruka takes the papers away harshly and reprimands kakashi like he isn’t younger and barely a chunin, “ if it was in my hands hound san I would not send anyone on solo missions. Let alone you (kakashi feels indignant at that tone. His record is stellar!) who has a habit of coming back chakra depleted and always with life threatening injuries.”
Kakashi tilts his head to the side confused and points out helpfully to the unaware chunin, “ but I always manage to accomplish the task perfectly. 100% success rate (kakashi is not proud because only he and Sandaime knows what horror half of those missions were. But it is a good record)”
Iruka gives him a look which Kakashi is unable to place. He’s seen the same look on Sandaime’s face sometimes. It was there when Sandaime limited the solo missions that an ANBU could volunteer for.
“ I hope that you don’t treat your comrades the same way you do yourself Hound-san.” Iruka mutters and waves at Kakashi impatiently. There is a long line waiting behind him.
Kakashi nods and shunshins away not willing to face anyone he knows in that line. Iruka had to be one of those.
The ones who believe that shinobi lives are worth more than the mission or the task given. Kakashi agrees sometimes. He does. He never lets a mission come in between a comrade’s life.
But he also believes that people like Kakashi, essentially trash but valuable tools also exist. And they are there just for completion of missions, for protecting konoha, for serving the village as much as they can for as long as they live.
Iruka is wrong. Kakashi will take as many undesirable missions as he can because that’s what his function is.
Kakashi leaves on a three week long solo assassination mission two days before his birthday. He doesn’t have the heart to face either Gai or Asuma.
It’s Naruto’s birthday and although Obito thinking ahead had already asked his friends for help(along with Mikoto-san who just one week after the Kyubi disaster invited herself in Obito’s little apartment), he still has to purchase a lot of stuff which is fine, he can delegate, but somehow in his excitement about Naruto turning three ( three!) Obito had forgotten to purchase his gifts.
Well, he has already bought a few but more never hurts and Obito never got many gifts in his own childhood and thus he wants to spoil the kid rotten.
So he’s walking absentminded along the streets of konoha, his focus on the list in his hand when he suddenly walks into the person walking on his left to avoid a hoard of children, the lack of the vision on his left making him unable to stop the impact on time.
His reflexes though are quite well honed and he thinks the person might be a civilian as they simply go down and are prevented from face planting only because obito grips them around the waist.
The person gasps and obito’s worried that he’s somehow managed to still hurt the guy moves ahead and turns around to face the guy while still holding the person.
It would be an understatement to say that Obito was shocked to see his mysterious victim as Kakashi.
It’s been almost 15 months since Obito saw kakashi in a meeting of all the elite Jounin of konoha. Well the one Kakashi did bother to attend. There have been 2 more after that and Kakashi’s been absent from both.
He looked better then to say the least.
Now, he looks pale. Ashen almost and Obito can see that he’s favouring his right upper body while limping on his left side. He’s clearly recently back from a mission and badly injured.
The hospital was 2 blocks back however. Obito feels concern and instead lets his anger take over,
“ oi kakashi. The hospital is in the opposite direction.”
Kakashi looks at him, his one visible dark grey eye dazed and hazy looking, he asks softly,
“ o..ob..obito?”
Obito sighs already feeling his concern increase. He doesn’t know why though. He doesn’t care about the bastard at all!
“ yeah. Hospital opposite direction kakashi. Focus.”
Kakashi nods, apparently so tired and exhausted that he’s even unable to control his movements, he tells him tiredly, “ I know. Wouldn’t give pain killers. Town edge, a clinic.”
It takes Obito a bit to understand the half formed sentences and actually accept their meaning. He asks sharply, grabbing the man’s arm tightly,
“ why so?”
“Hmmm, oh…hmm….they accused me of seeking medical attention for drugs. Hokage signed off on it.”
Swaying Kakashi manages to take out a slip of white paper from his pant pocket (jet black, stained with dark red just below the knee on his left side) and hands it over to obito.
It’s a official letter from the hokage ( minato sensei’s stamp on it) stating Kakashi is not to be given any heavy pain killers in view of the evidence of drug seeking behaviour submitted by the hospital.
It’s utter bullshit! Kakashi has a drug problem? What the hell?
Obito frowns at his former friend and asks, “ you are clearly injured however, how can they refuse treatment if..”
Kakashi shakes his head and he’s swaying almost dangerously, Obito puts his arm around Kakashi supporting the lean man,
“ they do, without painkillers. (Small voice) just wanted some this time…it..umm…it’s umm. I am sorry.”
Why the hell is Kakashi apologising to him? Well, if it’s because he’s making Obito late for Naruto’s birthday then it’s fine he thinks.
He looks at Kakashi and the man clearly is in no condition to even walk a mile let alone ten and obito sighs, his bleeding heart surging and releasing protective instincts. He holds kakashi securely and says to him in a soft tone,
“ it’s alright. I am taking you there. You’ll feel a bit of change in atmosphere though. I am going to use my mangekyo here.”
Kakashi suddenly grins at him ( as much Obito can see from the crinkling of his eye and the stretch of his mask) and says, “ hmm..hmm…I have heard. Impressive.”
Obito forces the blush down and in order to hide himself from Kakashi’s dazed uninhibited rambling immediately takes them to edge of town where he remembers seeing a clinic long ago.
The doctors and nurses at the clinic take deep sighs after looking at Obito’s luggage and beckons him inside towards a gurney. He places Kakashi on it who tries to grip his arm but suddenly stops and retreats. Obito tries his best to ignore the action and any feelings he has about it.
The doctors and nurses present there are quite familiar with Kakashi and one of them shows Obito to the waiting room and obito sits.
It’s only after few minutes that he realises suddenly that he’s staying there to see how Kakashi fairs. It’s a sobering thought. He hasn’t felt anything other than anger for Kakashi in a long time.
Damn his bleeding heart.
Although he has to accept (however much he doesn’t want to) that seeing Kakashi after so long and in such a bad condition has shaken something loose inside Obito. Something dark and inky that’s only now started to leave Obito’s insides as his love for Naruto grows and as he forms new friends and relationships.
The better rapport he’s been able to build with his clan (well mostly Mikoto-san, Itachi, sasuke and Shishui) has also played a big part in bringing Obito out from the darkness which was left inside him.
He wonders whether Kakashi ever found something or someone who managed to bring him out of his own darkness. He remembers Gai and his persistent attitude towards being Kakashi’s rival (more like best friend) and Asuma and Kurenai often mentioning Kakashi’s name here and there.
Obito’s never paid any attention to those conversations before, trying to ignore everything related to the guy who took the conscious decision of killing Rin and abandoning a small child. Now he wishes he had.
After almost an hour when Obito’s finally sent a summon to Mikoto san letting her know about his current predicament the Medical ninja finally comes out from behind the door where they had taken Kakashi.
The medical Ninja looks at Obito and an expression of shock comes over him which he quickly dismisses giving sharp orders to some other junior medi-nins before approaching Obito. He asks in a suspicious tone,
“ are you waiting here for Kakashi? I have never seen you before”
Obito is feeling irritated enough to reply to the suspicious man in a faked innocent tone, “ neither have I you medical-nin san.”
The medical ninja sighs and rakes his hand through his blonde hair before murmuring, “ that brat always gets on my nerves and makes my manners turn abysmal. (Obito fully agrees and a smile graces his lips, the man focuses on Obito yet again and this time tells more softly) I am sorry about that Obito-san. Yes, I am quite aware who you are it’s just that usually Kakashi comes here alone or one of his comrades drops him off.”
Obito feels a sharp clenching in his gut and he is unable to place the reason, he just nods to hide the unusual pain and asks in a neutral manner, “ how is Kakashi? He looked quite banged up there.”
The medical ninja sighs and waves at Obito to follow him as he moves in the direction of Kakashi’s room, obito wants to tell him to stop, he doesn’t really want to visit kakashi, he’ll be just as much happy to receive any information and leave. His legs however follow the man without thinking and obito feels helpless.
They enter the room and there is Kakashi lying on bed, looking vulnerable and somehow incredibly lean under the blankets which are covering him. He looks sad even with his eyes closed and Obito un-thinking moves towards his right side to take a better look at him.
The medical ninja picks up kakashi’s chart and starts outlining everything that’s wrong with the man,
“ the most troubling thing is the Chakra exhaustion really, and the damaged chakra pathways around his right arm which will both take a while to heal. He also had 4 busted Ribs on his right side, a fractured radius on his left side and a fractured femur also on his left side. Apart from some other nicks and lacerations. All things considering pretty standard for him but quite painful.”
The blonde man sighs again and Obito feels nausea building up inside him hearing that it was apparently pretty standard for Kakashi to come home this banged up. Obito doesn’t remember the last time he actually suffered chakra exhaustion on a mission. Although thinking about it, kakashi’s suffered the problem with his chakra levels ever since the Kannabi mission. It’s something they never talked about before as Kakashi focused on just increasing his reserves.
Obito looks at Kakashi and feels a serious urge to reach out.
“ he’s pretty out of it because of all the painkillers.” The medical ninja says, almost challengingly.
Obito looks at him and realises that the man is expecting Obito to go running to the hokage, Obito feels anger bubbling inside him, “ I am not going to reprimand you for giving someone clearly in need the required treatment. In fact I would like to sincerely Thank you for taking care of him despite the Hokage’s orders.”
The man relaxes marginally and nods before offering softly, “ I am Yoshiko taminara. Head of this clinic. And those orders are absolute shit. Kakashi has never shown any inclination towards drug abuse (angrily) I could even say that he actually shows..” The man stops himself in time and gives obito a sheepish smile, “ I am sorry. It’s not often someone comes here and actually stays with Kakashi.”
Obito feels that clenching sensation again and it makes him unbearably angry. He…he‘s not worried about Kakashi. Kakashi lives his life like he wants to and Obito doesn’t have a say in it. Anyways, he doesn’t like the man at all.
He feels a slight movement by his hand and looks down to see kakashi’s two fingers reaching out to him, his thumb closed around his other two fingers. It’s the standard unison sign after a duel and Obito finds himself twitching. Wanting to grip those fingers and never let them go. His heart wanting to provide comfort and companionship to someone he’s shunned for so long now.
May be he could invite Kakashi ( or simply transport him) to Naruto’s birthday party?
He looks down when he feels a soft touch around his fingers and finds kakashi gripping them softly in his. It’s such a innocent and trustful gesture that obito is left choking on his grief and sadness.
As soon as Kakashi takes a deep breath and seems to slip into a deep sleep Obito activates his mangekyo and leaves.
He’s a bleeding heart but he’s also a coward sometimes. He’ll…he’ll let Gai know about Kakashi so that he can check up on the bastard.
He doesn’t visit Kakashi after but he does find a wrapped gift box and a small card along with it with a simple “ THANK YOU” in kakashi’s beautiful handwriting the next day mixed in with Naruto’s birthday presents.
Obito closes his eyes tightly and stores the card away in his pocket. Naruto doesn’t care who gave him the set of shuriken shaped crayons because he’s just ecstatic about it and busy flaunting it among his little buddies and Obito doesn’t mention anything either.
Gai gives him a soft acknowledging nod when they see each other next.
Obito just feels like somebody stepped on his heart and refuses to leave. (It’s kakashi, Obito’s sure but doesn’t acknowledge).
Kakashi is 19 and hasn’t had a vacation in years. The last time their ANBU commander insisted on Kakashi taking a mandatory leave, kakashi requested for an A rank mission from the mission desk before his leave could be sanctioned. He spent four days of his week long leave on the mission and the rest in the hospital.
Their ANBU commander now makes sure to file a direct order under proper documents before actually giving them. Kakashi stands by his reasoning that it’s clearly because of him that someone improved their paperwork habits.
Genma and Raidou both stand by that Kakashi’s just a pain in the ass and nobody should mess with him. It’s a blanket understanding among ANBU at this point.
So, yeah, vacation, holidays, free days, leaves whatever you had like to call them. Kakashi has those because this time all the paperwork was filed to the point and Iruka refuses to ignore anything that comes from the ANBU san who leaves him sweet pineapple every time Iruka sets a good trap.
Kakashi knows they all are just against him and want to get back at him for various unknown ( known kakashi!) reasons.
The free time he has as a result seems more like punishment. Too much time to think, dream and ponder.
He visits the memorial stone early in the morning when he knows Obito would never be there ( sometimes after a particularly gruesome mission Kakashi likes to visit in the evening when Obito is usually there talking softly to little Naruto) and he has to leave only after an hour because just when he had been handed his orders for a leave, Gai had intercepted him and they had agreed on a challenge.
Kakashi feels like this is clearly an intervention from his well meaning not-but-friends.
Because even though Genma, who’s been a part of the rag tag group of Gai’s friends and was also in Gai’s genin team ended up joining ANBU, he did so only recently (apparently at a more appropriate age than kakashi) and with him he has brought a sense of playfulness (?) to the ANBU.
Kakashi likes to call it lack of discipline but he’s no one to talk about that so he supports Genma in his own unique manner.
Having said that he’s also pretty sure it was Genma who proposed this intervention seeing they had their last mission together and by the end of it Kakashi had been so severely exhausted and chakra depleted that he hadn’t even remembered the last leg of their journey. Along with Tenzou most likely. His kouhai is a worry-wart.
So kakashi is free, with time for bad thoughts and challenges with Gai.
And apparently it’s today that Obito’s decided that he had like to visit Minato sensei and Rin early in the morning.
He watches from his periphery as Obito strides towards the memorial stone, his steps sure and confident. Kakashi thinks about leaving, thinks about about that day almost an year past when Obito for all purposes helped him and showed him concern and suddenly he falters.
May be they can still exist in a space together even if apart.
Obito without faltering or stumbling (like he used to do so often in their early years) comes and stands beside Kakashi.
It takes Kakashi sometime to keep his breathing regular because he never thought they had be able to stand beside each other ever again. Almost shoulder to shoulder, in solidarity for their beloved fallen comrades and loved ones. It gives Kakashi peace and leaves a deep ache in his heart.
It’s obito who breaks the silence between them after a bit, “ Kakashi”
Kakashi doesn’t know what he can say to that so he just tilts his head slightly, acknowledging the other man’s presence. Obito continues clearly affected but willing to let Kakashi’s lack of social niceties slide in favour of saying whatever he’s here for,
“ There are talks of Itachi and Shisui being assigned to ANBU”
Kakashi knows well how close Obito is to both of them. They are the only ones among his cousins who accept Obito and his ideologies. He also is quite aware of both their reputation. Kakashi nods his head softly because he knows even if he doesn’t really agree. Itachi’s too young. Shisui is too but Kakashi had already placed that bar too low.
“ both having Sharingan they’ll most likely be placed under your command for their initial missions.”
Kakashi twitches but doesn’t react any further.
Obito continues regardless,
“ I don’t want any promise from you here. I just want you to know that if anything happens to them under your command, (softly yet with promise of threat in his tone) anything at all, I don’t think I’ll be able to control myself like before.”
Kakashi just nods. Not willing to promise anything to Obito but willing nonetheless to protect someone precious to his former friend with everything he has got.
Obito gives a nod as well and turns around to leave, he says not looking towards Kakashi,
“ don’t turn them into trash Kakashi. They have good courageous hearts, both of them.”
Trash.
Kakashi’s been trash his entire life and he knows they are as much useful as any shinobi is but he thinks what Obito means is that he wants his cousins to remain human.
Kakashi’s never been good with keeping his promises.
Obito grips his dark hair feeling frustrated and angry with himself.
Trash.
He called Kakashi trash and he didn’t even react at that. Obito knows himself well enough to determine that he used that word just to get a rise out of Kakashi. Just to aggravate him and hear him promise Obito that he’ll be keeping his cousins safe.
His cousins. His dear young wonderful cousins who are too talented and intelligent for their own good. Too young for a world in darkness that is ANBU.
Oh god. Obito feels so conflicted with himself. He..he shouldn’t have said that to Kakashi.
But. But, his cousins need someone to protect them. Someone to keep an eye on them and Obito only knows Kakashi. They are too young.
Just like Kakashi used to be. Look where that got him. Cold blooded Kakashi.
Obito doesn’t want them to join ANBU but it’s not in his hands when the clan has decided that they must and Itachi and Shisui are nothing but loyal to Konoha and the Uchiha.
Obito wonders where does that line lies where they have to decide between the two. He hopes they never have to look for it.
He hopes for once Kakashi can keep his not-promise.
Kakashi is 20 and a failure like he’s been for the past 15 years.
He doesn’t understand why he had been assigned a mission to lead 3 chunin nonetheless in retrieving a scroll on some secret sealing technique. The mission was way below kakashi’s usual ones but he had agreed because Iruka had been assigned to it and apparently the Sandaime trusted Kakashi to protect his precious one.
Kakashi thinks as he carries Iruka’s unresponsive body inside the borders of their village that perhaps Sandaime should stop placing his trust on a mere tool and start with trusting humans. With treating them as humans.
Although, Kakashi thinks looking at Iruka as he places him on a gurney, it’s not entirely his fault either. Iruka’s stubbornness goes beyond pranks, filing and paperwork.
Also, Kakashi recognises a damn good fuinjutsu user when he sees one and Iruka clearly even at his age and rank is one of the best. Well, that thought actually clears a lot of things about this mission for Kakashi.
While kakashi had only been gone for a very short duration he realises on his return that Itachi’s been offered a team of his own.
It’s after that mission that Iruka decided he had be better off being an academy teacher and Kakashi found out after some digging of his own that Itachi’s apparently a ROOT agent.
A failure.
Kakashi is 21 and he senses everything falling apart. For once he doesn’t want the responsibility, doesn’t want to be the trash that everyone just throws away without a second glance.
Doesn’t want to be a betrayer, a traitor along with a thief and a killer.
Kakashi turns his head down unable to face Obito’s furious gaze, “ Root operates under Danzou, Obito. It..it’s not somewhere one can go uninvited or without conviction. (Pointing out so as to make Obito understand him) it’s almost treason to join ROOT, it’s against the Hokage.”
And it should make Obito understand, make him considerate of Kakashi’s choice here but Obito’s angry and afraid of loosing someone precious to him, he’s frustrated with a system that allows such things to happen in their village. He retorts scathingly to someone he’s known this is what has always mattered most, who has nothing but this,
“ what does it matter to someone like you?”
Kakashi jolts back and looks at obito before asking softly,
“ someone like me?”
Obito doesn’t back down and sneers once again, his body shaking with his anger and grief, “ yes! Someone who has absolutely nothing in life except one mission and then another! Why does this matter to you so much! Why are you not able to think about those kids who are willing to give their lives, their innocence, everything they are just to protect this damn ungrateful village!”
Kakashi looks down because he has nothing to say about those kids who called him senpai like Tenzou, whom he protected and depended on having his back in the field likewise, whom he taught so much and in turn learned so much from. But he looks up after a minute because he does have something to say to Obito, a person he had considered a friend,
“ because they have you to think about them Obito. You’ll make sure they get everything they deserve, that every heroic deed of theirs would be acknowledged. That is a Shinobi’s life Obito. Sacrifice and hardships. You are right Obito, I have no one. Will you make sure that I won’t just always be remembered as trash? Will you insist on placing my name on that memorial stone? Will you make sure that the future generations know that the white fang’s son gave his life for the village and not being a traitor? (Sadly) or will you just pass by that ugly grave in the empty hatake compound without looking back? (Softly) I have always been trash Obito, I want the chance to be something more.”
Obito laughs and laughs. Angry, grief stricken, afraid, and betrayed. He…he had thought Kakashi would jump at the chance to repay his debt.
“ you are a selfish bastard Kakashi. You always have been. You have always just wanted for yourself. You have never had someone to want something for them.”
Kakashi hurt at that comment replies vehemently, “ I am not seeing you stepping forward Obito! You have no right to read the riots act to me if you are not willing to do it either!”
Obito looks at kakashi for a moment and then closes his eyes trying to dispel the image from his head, he replies to his once best friend, no longer having the energy or the desire to hold anything against him, “ I will. I was always going to even when I prepositioned you Kakashi. I can’t let someone else take that entire burden. But I suppose I must. Mikoto san will take care of Naruto with me gone.”
Obito mutters a few more things but Kakashi stands there not listening anything beyond Obito’s determination to do this one thing for someone he considers precious to him. Obito’s ready to give up on his dream of becoming the Hokage, he’s ready to be labelled a black stain in Konoha’s history, he’s ready to become a martyr or a missing nin just to protect those two boys and his clan’s name.
Those boys who were Kakashi’s responsibility when they joined ANBU and kakashi failed them.
Kakashi looks up and Obito’s giving him a smile, a sad forlorn smile, he says softly,
“ I guess I really had no right to ask that of you anyways Kakashi. I am sorry about that. (Standing straight) This is a goodbye then Kakashi.”
And kakashi’s jolted awake. Obito is his precious person and Kakashi can’t let him do this. Obito is also precious to Naruto who is Minato sensei and Kushina-san’s legacy. Obito has friends and family and precious people who would fight for him and his safety and his honour. Obito has Itachi and Shisui who Kakashi is sure wouldn’t let Obito do this sitting quietly. It makes his own decision easy that all he has to really do is write a letter for Tenzou and Gai.
“ i..I’ll do it Obito. (Not willing to meet obito’s gaze Kakashi keeps looking down) if you do this then Itachi and Shisui will only come behind you, would always resent konoha and everyone residing here. They are quite young and even though beyond their years I think your sacrifice will hurt them enough to harbour malicious intent towards the hokage. I..i think it’s only fair if someone without such attachment takes on this responsibility. You’ll just fail at this like you do at most things anyways Obito”
Obito is silent for so long that if Kakashi couldn’t feel his chakra or smell his distinctive odour, he would think Obito had left after getting his way, he says softly after a bit,
“ Kakashi? Are you..this will not be easy Kakashi.”
Kakashi just waves a hand at him and replies in an almost casual tone, “ mah obito, all the more reason for me to take up the mantle here…”
Obito looks down, he wants to protest, wants to rail at Kakashi that what happened to his conviction from before, what happened to being someone important, someone precious but he cannot. He had come hoping to convince Kakashi but having done it has left a deep hole in his chest. He’s also quite aware that Kakashi’s assessment about his cousins is correct. He takes a deep breath and decides that for once he would think without his emotions coming in between.
“Alright. Alright. Hmm…we…we have to protect the kids though. All the kids.I..they are playing no part in this. They are innocent and..”
Kakashi tunes out Obito’s blabbering already thinking about the things he’ll have to take care of before embarking on this last ever mission for konoha one way or another. The execution of everything would have to be absolutely perfect.
“You fucking bastard! You killed all those kids. Are you fucking insane kakashi! Those were innocent kids! We…we talked about this! KAKASHI!”
Obito dives forward in anger and grief with the innocent faces of those little kids imprinted on his mind forever as his sharingan spinned. He should have known Kakashi would do this. Would never do something just because he was good or being altruistic. The fucker had wanted to do this! Might have even been involved with Danzou all along!
Obito angrily thrust his kunai forward but it’s instantly blocked by kakashi who replies coldly,
“ you are too soft Obito. They had to die. The whole clan had to die. Now all the people left are you and those kids and that weakling woman. Come on out..come on little menaces.” kakashi sneers by the end of it.
“ I am not letting you touch them kakashi! Were you working for Danzou all along? Were you the traitor who told him about Shisui and his plan? I trusted you!”
Kakashi shakes his head laughing menacingly, “ you shouldn’t have Obito. I live for myself and myself alone. He promised me another sharingan and I couldn’t resist you see.(coldly) they all have to die Obito. Whether you die first or you do last doesn’t matter to me”
With that Kakashi promptly forms the signs for chidori, his right arm buzzing with the cry of the thousand birds.
Obito, angry and devastated activates his mangekyo as well. The intent to kill growing strong within him. He’s been practising his kamui relentlessly for years now, he couldn’t save Minato sensei and Kushina but he will save his precious people now.
Kakashi is thrown into a tree behind from the impact of the attack and Obito follows with the momentum of his throw. His hand placed securely on the kunai lodged deeply into kakashi’s side, various fuma shuriken scattered about them.
He looks up in anger and betrayal not wanting to face Kakashi but needing to look his former friend in the eyes. What he sees makes Obito’s hand tremble over the kunai forcing a pained gasp from Kakashi who’s breathing is already heavy.
He slowly softly gives Obito a smile. His only visible grey eye hazy and clouded. One eye only.
“Yo..you didn’t…didn’t uncover t..the sha…sharingan while using chidori”
“I must have forgotten obito” Kakashi tilts his head to one side, the smile still present in his one visible eye.
“Why would you do this! You lied you piece of shit! You have been lying all along! You killed those kids! Kids Kakashi!?” Obito knew why. He KNEW! And he couldn’t reconcile it with everything that he had thought, that he’s been thinking to make himself ready to face this moment.
He wasn’t ready at all. Kakashi made him prepare.
Kakashi just shrugs wincing slightly.
“ you never meant to kill Shisui and itachi and sasuke. But you killed all the others kakashi. Why?!” Obito conveys his theory. His voice choked on realisation.
“ you knew what had to be done…what…what I had to do but also that I wouldn’t be able to” he continues further. His tone gaining confidence because he knew he was right but his voice getting subdued.
“Ma..Maah Obito…you have always nee..needed the right motivation.(pained) I am sorry about the kids obito.” Kakashi replies softly, his words ending up with a deep rattling wet cough.
Obito sees something wet staining kakashi’s mask and he hesitantly moves his other hand forward, catching Kakashi’s hazy gaze for consent before lowering the Wetly stained mask. His fingers gaining a red tinge.
Blood has escaped kakashi’s mouth, dripping steadily down past his lips and Obito is reminded of the scene almost six years previous. This time with Rin’s face in front of his eyes, her lips moving, her gaze wide but determined.
Obito gasps, shaking his head. That’s..he looks at Kakashi again and says vehemently, trying to sooth the worsening ache in his heart,
“ This is what Rin did. She…she came in front of you herself..that..only that moment was painful enough for you to activate your sharingan and call for help. Call for me..b..but i…i..”
Obito meant to remove his hand gripping the kunai from Kakashi’s side but Kakashi gasped, his body jerking as he brought his arm around to grip Obito’s over the kunai.
“D..don’t let go Obito…j..just for a bit..i..so.something to tell you”
Obito breathed, panicked and feeling afraid and empty, he nodded and promised to his friend, “ I won’t…I won’t Bakashi..”
“Y..you are right Obito. Bu..but I’ll still always be res..responsible for her death. Not..strong enough…i..wasnt..strong..”
Obito shook his head vigorously not able to entirely let go of his grief but his anger deflated after so long being in confines.
“NO. It..it wasn’t your fault! She chose to sacrifice herself.”
A sob tore itself out of Obito’s throat and he said even more persistently,
“ don..dont let her sacrifice go in vain in your self pity Bakashi..”
Kakashi looked at him then. His one visible eye trying to find something in Obito’s and when he apparently found it he smiled that soft smile again,
“Hmmm…Bakashi…”
“Yeah…you stupid bastard. You played with my emotions to make me attack you so that I could get over my anger! I know now! And I am not going to let you die bakashi! Not until we have had a chat..no..i..i need to apologise…too for what i..” Obito’s voice trailed off as kakashi’s rapidly cooling palm tapped a finger on his warm one.
“I…it’s ok Obito. I..i think for on..ce I did what tou-chan would have done. What he…gave his life for shinobi to understand. I..would have volunteered anyways..o..obito. They are the future of Konoha obito.”
Obito shook his head trying to deny everything. He said pressing his palm against the heavily bleeding wound on kakashi’s side,
“I..i am gonna take you to hospital kakashi. Or call for medics…yeah..hang on Baka…hang..
“T..the eye…your eye..it..ummm (coughing wetly) it’s stored in a special chakra enclosing and tissue preserving seal in..my apartment. Get it obito. (Tiredly) g..get it and use it…” Kakashi informed. His voice weakening but level.
“Wha…what? Why? Are..are you not…” obito shakily moved his hand and pushed Kakashi’s hitai-ate up.
“Si…since when?” Obito asks shakily, his one eye comically wide and focused on the scarred socket where his own eye used to be.
“Hmm…w..hen..joi..ned…ANBU”
“Why?”
“Maah…Ob.Ito y.you..gave it to me..to see the future in….your stead. All I ma..managed to ma..make you see was Rin’s death. I..i..couldn’t after that. You see future better than me obito. Brighter. A..and I..I couldn’t spoil…it w..with what I saw.”
“Bakashi..you…you absolute bastard!”
Obito moved forward hastily not caring about the mess that blood made over his own Jounin attire. He hugged kakashi’s slight and weak body close to his chest taking care to press the bleeding wound tightly as he whispered,
“ don’t you leave me you stupid idiot. Don’t! You…you took Rin from me…you are not allowed to go be..before I punish you for that…Bakashi..”
Obito called softly at the end feeling kakashi’s body leaning even more weight on him.
Kakashi just hummed softly before replying,
“ i..i am sorry Obito. I..i won’t e..ever be ..a..able to atone for that. And this”
“ d..don’t you dare say that. I forgive you..you hear me…I do..i do Bakashi. Stay with me…stay with me please.” He pleaded with his only remaining team-mate and his friend.
Kakashi however just shook his head, his silvery white hair matted with blood grazing Obito’s chin softly. Obito gripped the man tighter, not daring to move much but antsy with the lack of motion. Kakashi coughed and Obito tried to avoid the obvious wet sound and feeling of it on his damp shirt,
“ i..can do this obito…atone for all my sins. I..i have to.”
Then obito felt the body in his arms grow heavier and he slowly pulled kakashi a bit back so as not to dislodge his arm which was probably keeping kakashi alive but he had to at least see his face.
What he saw turned his blood cold.
Kakashi was smiling, a soft serene smile present on his blue, oh so blue lips. The blood staining his lips mixed with foam.
The idiot. The fucking idiot. The self sacrificing moronic idiot.
Obito heaved in a gasp, choked on his own tears and slumped on his knees with Kakashi’s body held securely in his arms.
The..the..absolute bastard. The..man who killed Rin.
His eye shed tears uncontrollably and Obito didn’t bother wiping them even when other shinobi, other ANBU appeared beside him.
His friend. His best friend. The little boy who wore a shuriken patterned scarf and took Obito’s breath away in practice.
“Uhmm…Uchiha san?”
The boy who lost his eye for him. The boy who accepted the sharingan as the gift it was and made it his. Made it his even when it only gave him trouble with his hatake bloodline not suitable for the chakra drain of a permanently active doujutsu.
“Uchiha san, we have the medics with us. Are you injured as well?”
Obito didn’t pay any heed to the medics as they swarmed around him. He just carefully and lovingly replaced Kakashi’s mask. Trying to preserve that one bit of the boy who lost everything.
The boy whom Obito dismissed, hurt, called a traitor, a friend killer.
The man who gave his life for a clan that always treated him worse than dirt beneath their shoes and for a village that decided to sacrifice him and use him as a tool at every turn.
Obito cried and he couldn’t stop the harsh sobs even if he tried as he held the younger man securely in his arms. He didn’t let the ANBU pull him away when even the medics declared him dead. He couldn’t let go.
He didn’t care that Shimura Danzou called him a weakling for crying over a traitor’s corpse. Because Obito was not crying for a traitor.
He was crying for his best friend. He cried for the shinobi who gave all 21 years of his short life giving everything to the village that called him a traitor at end. He cried for the harsh reality that their world had become for treating a loyal shinobi as a traitor. As trash.
Obito, when the time came, when he became stronger and gained students that rivalled the strength of all 5 hidden villages combined, when he took his post as The Hokage after exposing every dirty detail about danzou.
Then..then he would tell the world that for a clan’s respect and ego they sacrificed a true shinobi. A dear friend regarded as friend killer. A loyal konoha shinobi called a sharingan thief. A boy with a pride filled countenance who committed suicide with a serene smile on his face.
Only when Obito managed to bring peace in the Shinobi world, only when he could trace the names of Hatake Sakumo and Hatake Kakashi along with other heroes will he stop the anguished cry of his beating heart.
He would meet Rin then in the afterlife. She would be as beautiful as ever but Obito’s heart would beat for someone else then, cry for someone who is unable to understand still that he’s more than trash, more than a killer, a thief. That he is loved and precious and has been that from the moment he decided that he wanted to live his life being precious to somebody.
Obito would take a Kakashi clad in a beautiful navy yukata (contrasting so wonderfully with his own white one) in his arms and call him precious because kakashi’s always learned better with words.