Chapter Text
Manjiro Sano was everything that you desired and everything you couldn’t have. Despite being somewhat pretty with his shoulder-length black hair, deep black eyes and pale skin, he was nothing special. At least not as special as everyone painted him to be. While Mikey remained Toman’s leader and your superior along with Kisaki Tetta and Izana Kurokawa, someone like him should be grateful for earning even a simple glance from someone like you.
You were beautiful, smart, funny and rich, the perfect balance between evil and good, you liked to believe. Yet this wasn’t enough to capture the short man’s attention, it seemed. Everything pointed out that you weren’t the source of the issue in the dysfunctional relationship you maintained with Toman’s number one. But despite your confidence and success, you couldn’t help thinking that maybe you did miss something. Why else didn’t Mikey love you the way you did?
While this question haunted you and man after man disappointed you, you still found yourself chasing the black-haired man’s attention. Growing more and more desperate with each failed attempt. But Mikey did like you, he had told you once as he let you ravish his body in the confines of his bedroom. Yet he was still unable to open up to you, keeping you at arm’s length when he knew you craved and could handle more.
He wasn’t ready, he had told you. Your love was too much for him and his heart was too fragile to beat the way yours did for him, you had figured yourself since he was unable to speak about how he felt. Everything was a guessing game with Mikey, you realised and as much as you hated that, you couldn’t seem to put an end to this one-sided love.
You got up from your colleague’s bed, picking up the underwear and clothes you had discarded earlier as you got dressed. He watched you carefully, his violet eyes shamelessly studying your curves despite having you on top of him just a few minutes ago. You didn’t give him a single look once done though, fixing your makeup instead.
Ran couldn’t understand why you would choose Mikey over everyone and he didn’t think anyone else did. While he wasn’t jealous that thought was amusing to him. If you desired, you could even have him. Only a stupid man would pass up the chance to call you theirs after all and he liked to think he wasn’t one of them. Yet you hadn’t shown true interest in anyone except Mikey and it had been years already. Still, it was a little strange of you to share other people’s beds when your heart was taken.
“Saw you were getting cosy with Izana last night,” he said, with a smirk.
You chuckled.
“Of course, I’m trying to maintain a good relationship with my boss, after all,” you replied, innocently.
He laughed.
“I’m pretty sure sucking all of Toman’s executives’ dicks is not the right way to do that,” he pointed out.
“First of all, I’m more into making their assholes sore. But you know that better than anyone else, Ran. Don’t you?”
The man knew he couldn’t contradict you with the smile you wore and he wouldn’t bother doing so. He agreed instead.
“I’m just saying, Izana is probably not the one you want to use to make Mikey jealous. He might not appreciate that, you know?”
You sighed while making sure you hadn’t forgotten anything before leaving.
“I don’t know what the fuck made you think I cared about your opinion, Ran,” you replied, irritated.
“That’s cold. I’m just trying to help you.”
While it was true that Ran was the closest person to a friend you had in Toman, his advice was still unsolicited and it annoyed you to no end.
“Well don’t,” you told him with a fake smile. “You should know I hate when people think they are allowed to tell me what to do.”
The man sighed, used to your small outbursts by now.
“Right. Must be why Mikey won’t pay attention to you,” he taunted with a smile.
He chuckled as your eyes sent daggers his way.
“No. It’s because he’s fucking stupid,” you said, before making your way over to Ran’s front door, not even bothering to say goodbye.
The man didn’t mind saying it to your face. But he stayed quiet this time. Even though you were right, Mikey was fucking stupid to not give you what you wanted. Everyone could see it.
“Izana,” you moaned, hips moving forward, as the man’s fingers buried themselves into your warm entrance. “You’re such a good boy.”
Your praises had the blonde man thrust faster and deeper into you. How bold you were to make him your toy. Izana could feel your walls tighten around his fingers as your orgasm took over you, his name falling from your lips like a prayer. You pulled him into a kiss as the dizziness started to fade. It was always so passionate with Mikey’s brother. Izana gave you teeth and tongue while he moaned into your mouth.
“My turn now,” you said against his lips, pushing him off of you. “Get on your back, pretty boy.”
He smiled, eager to receive his reward. You straddled him, before kissing him again and you realised you could get used to this if you wanted. But as you kissed down the man’s toned chest and stomach and your lips wrapped around the head of his cock, you remembered this still wasn’t who you wanted.
No, who you wanted barely looked your way even when all the men sitting at the table you shared stared at you. But even then did any of them cared about you like you cared about Mikey? It was unlikely and that thought hurt you. Still, you maintained the conversation with Kisaki, getting more flirty with each sip of your drink. But both of you knew he wouldn’t fall into your trap. While being a respected member of the gang you had also recently earned a reputation for yourself. Not that you cared, nothing seemed to matter much those past weeks anyways.
Your hand wrapped around Kisaki’s broader one, directing it to your thighs then to your entrance slowly. He let you guide him, only lightly stroking your cunt through the wet fabric of your panties in the crowded bar Toman’s executives including you had decided to celebrate the good news discussed in the meeting previously held.
“Don’t you want to play with me a little tonight?” you whispered in his ear.
He chuckled.
“That would be unwise.”
“Scared of getting addicted?” you teased with a smile.
“Possibly.”
You wondered if Kisaki was serious for a moment, while it was lightheartedly that he answered you, you still couldn’t help thinking about what it would be like if he was.
“I wouldn’t mind,” you said, mindlessly, not feeling flirty or teasing anymore.
Kisaki’s hand left the space in between your legs, resting on your thigh instead, having noticed the shift in your tone. Then he chuckled.
“I don’t think I’m your cure to loneliness, [Name].”
You smiled at him, the sadness evident in your eyes, not because you expected him to be. No, because you realized no one here was. You liked that Kisaki was honest with you, he wasn’t exactly that type you believed. But you had yet to know all the people in this place, all of you were only work partners after all. There was no intimacy you shared with anyone.
“Guess you are right,” you told him, standing up from your seat.
You readjusted your dress and made your way to the balcony of the bar, apologising to the people you accidentally bumped into, a little tipsy.
For a moment you wondered if you truly loved Mikey or if you were just incredibly lonely. As much as it was easy for you to charm people you could never find anyone that could satisfy you. No one was ambitious enough to offer a love like yours it seemed. A few tears rolled down your cheeks, while you stood alone surrounded by people.
Until you felt a hand wrap around your arm, pulling you back gently. You turned around, not bothering to dry your fresh tears.
“What are you trying to prove?” he asked you, deep black eyes staring into yours.
You didn’t think Mikey, out of everyone, would follow you.
“That I’m lovable.”
He didn’t say anything for a moment, fully aware that if he wasn’t the cause of your pain then he was certainly the trigger.
“You are,” he reassured you. “Way more than anyone else here.”
You smiled, surprised by his words and a few tears rolling down your cheeks. Mikey brushed them away gently with his fingertips and you wondered if you weren’t imagining this moment.
“But that won’t change the fact that I can’t give you what you want.”
Of course.
You weren’t disappointed. You were just sad and lonely again.
“I understand.”
You didn’t. How could you understand? You wished Mikey hadn’t come to see you. That would have been less hurtful, you believed. You pushed his hand away, harsher than what you had intended before leaving. He didn’t follow you this time, not wanting to do any more damage. You made your way outside of the bar with more tears blurring your vision. You thought you were accustomed to loneliness, but Mikey reminded you that you weren’t.