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Frank can’t quite put his finger on what’s changed this time around, but things have felt different since Danger Days was released. The vibe on tour has been different. He’s been different. He and Gerard have been different.
Not bad different, not at all. Actually, in most ways, it's better. Things just seem to flow really well between all of them… the whole band. It’s just… easier. Frank doesn’t ever feel like he has to try too hard to make things work, they just click. It’s pretty amazing actually.
And with Gerard it’s hard to explain. It’s like everything finally fits. No drunken awkwardness, no dark angst, no longer them on a crusade against the homophobes all the time. It’s just… them. Like every time Frank crawls into bed with Gerard, it feels like when you put on your favorite hoodie just out of the dryer. It’s warm and soft and clean and always fits perfectly.
Well, maybe not always clean. That’s something about Frank that’s different. He’s always been a pretty clean guy, at least comparatively. Well, compared to how Gerard had been for years, everyone’s clean. But while touring for this record, cleanliness hasn’t really been something Frank has worried about so much. It could be the whole ‘dirty killjoys’ vibe. It could be that Gerard has rubbed off on him after all the time they’ve spent together over the years. Or maybe it’s some hormonal shift that’s making it so that Frank doesn’t start to stink as fast as he used to. He isn’t sure, but he can’t help but laugh on the third hotel night in a row that Gee offers him the shower first and he declines, because he just doesn’t feel the need. Then Gee comes to bed all clean and sweet-smelling because he uses girly shampoo, and for a minute Frank feels like everything’s backward.
When he feels Gee’s soft hands snaking up under his t-shirt and his mouth latches onto Frank’s neck, Frank sighs because everything fits. Even though it’s different, it’s still right. It’s just them where they are now. It’s not where they were before, but it’s good.
*_*_*
They have a run of festival shows in the summer and there is just no time at all to bathe. They go from one city to the next, sleeping on the bus and Frank feels like it’s been weeks since he’s seen the inside of a hotel room. He knows it’s probably only been three or four days, but it’s fucking hot and he’s been sweating like crazy and this time he really is starting to smell and it just feels like it’s been forever since he’s seen a real shower.
They have a couple of interviews before a show one day and are told that they’ll have a break in the afternoon before sound check and they can shower if they want to because this venue miraculously has showers in the dressing rooms. Frank weighs his options in the back of his mind all through the interviews. He didn’t sleep well last night and he knows if he skips the shower, he can probably get a nice nap in before sound check. He keeps trying to evaluate how rank he smells, but it’s hard to do that without actually sticking his nose in his armpit and he doesn’t feel like explaining his conundrum to the interviewers and the whole crew.
The other thing is that Frank looked ahead on the schedule a couple of days ago and knows that they have a hotel night coming up. It’s a hotel they’ve stayed at before and Frank is certain he remembers that the rooms have bathtubs. The idea of an actual fucking bath makes him sigh and his eyes roll back into his head a little bit just thinking about it. But what Frank is really looking forward to is taking a bath with Gerard. It’s something they did a lot on the U.S. leg of the World Contamination Tour because almost all of the hotels they stayed in had bathtubs. Sex in the tub became a routine for them, but they haven’t had one single opportunity yet this summer. The one other time they stayed in a hotel room with a bathtub, Frank had been fighting a cold and Gerard was just in a shitty mood and those two things combined are really not conducive to bathtub sex in the best of circumstances, and definitely not in the middle of an exhausting concert tour. Frank somehow feels that he is owed bathtub sex now, even if for no other reason than that he’s been forced to go without for too long. And, as absurd as it sounds, he just can’t see wasting a nap opportunity on a shower when he knows he’s going to get a bath in just a couple of days.
He takes a nap instead of a shower. It’s a great nap in his bunk, with Gerard cuddled up behind him, their hands clasped together, breathing in time with one another. Frank is almost asleep when Gerard shifts a little bit so that his breath isn’t hitting the back of Frank’s neck any longer. “No offense, Frankie,” he says, yawning, “But you kinda stink.”
Frank just smiles to himself and pulls Gerard’s arm around him a little bit more tightly.
*_*_*
Frank bounces on his heels in the hotel lobby while they get checked in and wait for their room keys. Gerard is sitting on a chair looking like he would fall asleep right there if Frank wasn’t standing next to him, holding his hand and swinging his limp arm around as he fidgets with anticipation.
Gerard stops Frank’s frantic movement with a firm hand on his hip and Frank looks down to find Gee looking up at him with a puzzled expression. “How do you still have so much energy?”
Frank shrugs, smiling. “I don’t know. Just happy to be sleeping in a bed tonight, I guess.”
“Are you sure you’re gonna be able to sleep? You drank like, six cups of coffee on the bus.”
Frank’s smile widens. “Oh, I’ll be able to sleep. Later, though. Not right away.”
Gerard raises an eyebrow as a knowing expression begins to dawn on his face. “What are you up to?”
Frank pulls Gerard up to standing because he can see their tour manager walking toward them with room keys and whispers into his ear, “You’re just about to find out.”
Gerard looks curious, but doesn’t say anything as they ride the elevator up to their floor, still hand-in-hand. The elevator ride seems to take forever and Frank is still bouncing a little bit, he almost feels… anxious? But that’s crazy. In his sex and shower-deprived state, he’s obviously made this ‘bathtub sex’ event into a bigger deal in his mind than it needs to be. The butterflies in his stomach start to settle when he feels Gerard begin rubbing his thumb in tiny circles over the top of Frank’s hand. He keeps doing it as they walk down the hall and by the time Frank is having an altercation with the room key card because he can’t seem to turn the handle fast enough to open the door while the light is still green, Gerard has planted his forehead on the side of Frank’s head and is saying, “Shhhhh,” into his ear. Frank can’t explain it because he hadn’t actually been talking, so he didn’t need to be shushed, but Gerard’s breath in his ear and that little sound makes him feel more grounded than he’s felt in days. He takes a deep breath and tries the door key again. This time he gets it open.
Gerard lets go of Frank’s hand as they walk into the room, dropping their bags and turning on lights as they go. Eventually Gerard asks, as he always does, “You want the first shower?”
Frank shakes his head, but doesn’t say anything.
Gerard walks over to him and takes his hands. Looking at him seriously as he says, “Frank, I love you, but… you smell… bad. I would really like to have sex with you tonight, you know, since we have a nice big bed and all, and it would really mean a lot to me if you would shower first.”
Frank doesn’t answer right away, which Gerard must take as a refusal, because he turns Frank to face the bathroom and gently pulls him toward it, saying in a quiet, soothing tone, “We’ll shower together, kay?”
Frank feels himself starting to nod as they walk into the bathroom, hypnotized by Gerard’s tone and the calming way in which he’s rubbing his hand up and down Frank’s back. He stops short and shakes his head when he sees the bathtub, though. “No.”
“Frank, why not?” Gerard sounds genuinely concerned now.
Frank turns to Gerard, allowing him see the massive smile that’s grown on his face. “We aren’t going to shower, because we’re going to take a bath.”
Gerard finally notices the bathtub and quickly says, “Oh!” returning Frank’s smile.
They don’t waste any time stripping and Frank gets in first. He likes to feel the water filling up around him, adjusting the temperature and adding more bubbles to make it perfect. Gerard likes to wait and get in once the tub is full. He sits on the edge of the tub with just his feet in and closes his eyes, sighing as the room fills with steam.
Frank starts to get hard, just sitting there watching Gerard. He begins stroking himself slowly. “Open your eyes, Gee. Look at me.”
Gerard does and he gasps a little bit when he sees how hard Frank is already, his own dick twitching at the sight, and Frank smiles. There’s nothing quite like knowing you’re wanted. Not that Gerard would ever try to hide it, but it’s still nice. Since Gee’s been sober, Frank has never had to wonder if the feelings he expresses are really sincere. Gerard’s always been a ‘heart on his sleeve’ kinda guy. Frank loves that.
They don’t talk for a few moments as Frank continues stroking himself. They’re content to just look at one another, communicating without words. Finally, Frank nods toward their bag of toiletries that Gerard brought in. “Pull out that shower gel I like, the one with the aloe vera in it. It doesn’t sting me.”
Gerard rummages around until he finds the soap Frank requested and hands it to him. He also pulls out shampoo and conditioner and then finally, now that the tub is almost full, settles himself into the water facing Frank. They arrange themselves straddling each other with Frank’s legs on top of Gerard’s. Frank immediately moves to pick up the shower gel, intending to squirt a bunch of it on his fingers and sit up to begin preparing himself, but Gerard grabs it away from him.
“Hey!” Frank squawks.
Gerard bats at his hands and pushes him to sit back again. “First hair. I think there’s something living in yours.”
Frank thinks that’s crazy because he’s been keeping his hair so short this summer. Even when it’s greasy, it doesn’t really show. But he lets Gerard wash his hair anyway. He uses the nozzle from the faucet to wet Frank’s head, soaping it up and then rinsing it quickly before picking up the conditioner. Frank balks at this. “I don’t need conditioner, Gee, my hair is too short.”
“Shut up,” Gerard says, kindly, shushing him. “I’m doing this.”
Frank sighs dramatically at the apparent waste of time, but allows Gerard to pour conditioner on his head and in about fifteen seconds he understands, because Gerard is massaging his scalp. He’s digging in with the pads of his fingers and finding a rhythm that makes all the tension that Frank hadn’t even realized he’d been holding, drain out of him and he sighs. He hears Gerard make a contented sound and Frank opens his eyes in time to see a look of pure devotion on his face. It’s gone as soon as their eyes meet, but Frank is content just knowing it was there.
After a few minutes Gee finishes the massage and rinses Frank’s hair. Frank returns the favor, taking his time to wash Gerard’s hair and massage his scalp with the conditioner. When he sees that look of pure bliss on Gerard’s face as he digs in his fingers a little roughly the way he knows Gee likes, he smiles and feels his heart swell. He thinks he probably looks like a lovesick lunatic right now, but he doesn’t care. Gerard is the only one who’s going to see and he obviously gets it.
After he’s rinsed Gerard’s hair, Frank finally gets permission to begin preparing himself. The logistics of this are little tough, but after trying it many different ways, they’ve figured out a way that works for them. Gerard helps prop him up so that he’s got one ass cheek on the side of the tub, with Gee holding up the other. Frank’s thigh is sort of lying on Gerard’s arm that’s holding him up and Frank holds onto his shoulder with one hand, the other hand free to prepare himself with. With his free hand, Gerard squirts a liberal amount of the shower gel on Frank’s fingers and then rubs his palm up and down Frank’s side as he watches. He’s always liked to watch this part. He watches as Frank’s ass swallows up his fingers in anticipation of Gerard’s cock. Frank pushes them in as far as he can, fluting them and scissoring them, and eventually hitting his prostate. Gee’s eyes flicker up to Frank’s face to take in his blissed out expression at the sensation. After Frank’s got three fingers in, he knows he’s ready. He doesn’t want to be any more open than this. He wants it to burn a little bit when he sinks down. He wants to really feel Gerard filling him up, even if it’s uncomfortable at first.
Frank pulls his fingers out and Gerard lowers him down into the tub and waits with Frank’s ass hovering just over his dick. He looks at Frank for confirmation and doesn’t let him down until he sees Frank’s tiny nod. Frank’s breath catches as he feels Gerard’s length begin to fill him. It’s too much, but it’s the best kind of too much. Gerard lowers him down slowly, but steadily, and doesn’t stop until he’s seated fully. Frank’s as full of Gerard’s cock as he’s ever going to be and it takes a few moments of Gerard running his fingertips up and down his back before he catches his breath and says, “Move, move,” a bit desperately.
Bathtub sex is hard. It really is. There’s not enough room for Frank to be up on his knees, so he really has no leverage at all to even try to help set the rhythm. What ends up happening is Gerard sits back as much as he can and pushes Frank’s ass back some so there’s room for him to move back and forth, shifting in and out while Frank just holds on tight to Gerard’s shoulders and goes with it. He tries to help some and his ab muscles are always sore as fuck the next day, but Gee still ends up doing most of the work, holding Frank’s thighs up as he thrusts as deep as he can. Gee never complains, though, and always refuses when Frank asks if he wants to try it differently.
It always takes longer to get a good rhythm going this way, but once they do, it’s perfect. Once things click into place, Gee is hitting Frank’s prostate on every upstroke and Frank wants to close his eyes at how good it feels. He doesn’t close his eyes though, because he doesn’t want to miss a second of this and can’t take his eyes off of Gerard’s face- his intense concentration as he moves and the way his brow furrows as he focuses when he shifts minutely to take a hand off of Frank’s thigh and begin stroking his length slowly. It’s a slow stroke, always too slow at first, but Gee does that on purpose so Frank won’t come too soon. After all this time, they both know how to work each other’s bodies perfectly to drag sex out for as long as possible so they can savor it.
Gradually Gerard’s strokes increase their speed at the same time as his thrusts in and out of Frank’s ass start to get more erratic, the rhythm faltering. Frank’s thinks Gee must be exhausted by now. It’s okay though, because Frank’s ready to come anyway. He clenches his ass around Gee’s cock and feels him falter again, speeding up his strokes even faster on Frank’s cock. Frank leans forward and plants his forehead against Gee’s, whispering, “Do it. Make me come. Come inside me Gee. Come on.”
Gerard gasps and Frank brings one of his hands down from Gerard’s shoulder to help jerk himself off. They stroke him together for about five more seconds and then that’s it. Frank comes all over Gerard’s belly and chest, his ass muscles involuntarily squeezing around Gee’s cock as he comes. Gee keeps stroking him through it and in just a second he comes too, gasping out, “Fuck Frank, fucking love you, Frankie.” He devolves into random, breathless panting and sighing as he comes down.
Frank lets himself fall forward on top of Gerard. His face plants into Gee’s shoulder. Gerard leans back and the change in angle makes his cock slip free of Frank’s ass. Frank can feel some of Gerard’s come sliding out of him after and it always feels extra weird in the water. He’s never sure if being in the tub should make him feel more or less dirty about it. He doesn’t really care, though. He’s had so much of Gerard’s come inside him; he’s beyond caring what it feels like after. So long as he can lie on top of Gerard as he comes down, and feel his arms around him, stroking his back in his post-orgasmic bliss, little else matters.
They lie together in the tub until the water goes cold and they both start shivering. They take turns toweling each other off before they land in bed, naked and warm and clean. Familiar and perfect.
Gerard lands with his head on Frank’s chest and Frank runs his fingers through his hair, trying to undo the crazy tangles and smiling at how the color has faded from an intense bright red to a soft strawberry color in just a matter of weeks. The dye faded faster this time and Frank is sure it’s because Gerard’s been washing his hair too often. He laughs softly to himself over that because if someone had told him back in the Warped Tour days that he’d one day think Gerard washed his hair too often, Frank would have told them they were crazy.
Gerard makes a questioning sound at Frank’s giggles, and Frank says, “Shhh,” with a finger over Gee’s lips. “I just love you, is all,” he says.
Gerard nods and mumbles, “Okay, love you, too.”
Frank thinks, yeah, they are different. Different than they were on Warped Tour or Projekt Revolution, or any other tour, and different than they’ll be in the future, but it’s okay. For right now, they fit just like this. This is how they are for today, and that’s just fine.