Chapter Text
Jin was distracted. It was a rough day for him, he was getting upset over an honest mistake but he couldn't get over the screams in his mind.
The situation was simple, he was working this morning and a customer called him ma’am. That's it, trivial, right? Except no, cuz suddenly he was doubting everything and kind of having a meltdown. He was in class, he was supposed to be paying attention, and he was trying to! He was so desperately trying to listen to his professor but his mind was racing and he couldn't focus, all he could think about was the fact that even now, 11 years on testosterone, 11 years since beginning transition, he Still Didn't Pass. And he wanted to brush it off, it was an honest mistake, it was, people mistake cis people for the other gender sometimes too, its whatever, the person apologized and corrected themself a few seconds later so obviously, obviously he passed, but that wasn't what his brain remembered.
He let out a long sigh as his peers started packing up. He followed suit, he would have to message one of his classmates, see if she could send him the notes. He pulled out his phone and grimaced at the flamingo pink case, the one that he loved dearly, with pretty pink peonies, the one his lovely boyfriend Namjoon bought him ages ago, because he knew that Jin would love it. Today though, he couldn't bear to look at it, not that he could just take off the case, because the phone itself was a rose gold and it wouldn't help any, so he just glared as he quickly messaged his boyfriend.
Aster: lovebug? Are you busy rn?
Jooniper: no, I just got out of work. Wanna come over angel?
Aster: is that ok?
Jooniper: ofc angel, you know I wouldn't offer if it wasn't
Aster: ...yeah. Um, could I steal one of your hoodies?
Jooniper: always :)
Aster: thank you bug, see you soon, love you <3
Jin pocketed his phone, finally, and then remembered that his hair was a bright pink too. Yes, he looked amazing, he was stunning, he is attractive, he looks great and he loves how he looks. He loves his bright pink hair, and his beautiful pink phone case, and his skinny jeans that make his legs look incredible. But right now he wanted to crawl out of his skin and hide away from it all. He grabbed his backpack, slinging it over his shoulder, out of sight. He wanted everything out of his sight at the moment, it was too much. He marched to his boyfriend's house, blocking out everything around him, he just needed a hug and a hoodie that would swallow him whole.
~
“Hey there angel how was yo-oof”
Jin cut off his boyfriend by barrelling into him. Namjoon stayed there, unmoved by him, hugging Jin back tightly. Jin loved his hugs, tight and very nearly suffocating, and oh so comforting. It was just what he needed. He always felt small and cherished in Namjoon’s arms even though they were nearly the same height. Namjoon's hand went to Jin's hair, running through it, in a comforting gesture, but he h a t e d his hair right now, he didn't want his Joon seeing him like this, so he pulled away. Namjoon let him go, looking at him confused and concerned. Jin walked inside, set down his backpack by the door, did the same with his phone, wanted the offending items away from him. He then looked back at Namjoon who closed the door, with a pleading look.
“Your hoodie?”
Namjoon smiled at him, going to the couch and picking up a. Pink hoodie. It's one Jin had gifted him. It was sweet. It was, it really was, but he was on the verge of crying at the thought of wearing it. He shook his head and Namjoon only looked more confused. He looked at his boyfriend, his beautiful boyfriend and started picking it up. Jin was closed up, his arms clamped over his chest tightly, he had been pushing his hair out of his face every time any hair fell, reflexively, and the panicked look he had at the hoodie. Oh. Oh fuck.
Namjoon frowned softly, rushing into his room and switching the hoodie out for a deep blue one. He tugged it onto Jin and he giggled at the action. Joon then swooped up Jin into his arms, and cuddled him safely and Jin felt better already. He wrapped his arms around Namjoon, smiling finally.
***
“What does that mean?”
Jin was frustrated. He didn't want to explain himself to a friend of a friend. He was 17 and he had been doing it every day for a year basically.
“It means I’m a guy”
“Oh. ok, why’d you make it sound so confusing?”
Jin stared at Namjoon, he hadn't had this easy of a coming out ever, there had always been more confusion, more frustration. But Namjoon just accepted it, like it was so obvious. He liked him. Jhope had some nice friends.
~
“Can you bring me a heating pad Joonie?”
Jin was suffering. He had started testosterone shots recently, and he hoped that the periods would stop sooner, but they didn't and he was in so much pain. He just wanted his joonie to hold him tight like he always did and make him forget about the world.
“Mhm! Do you need painkillers? Or any junk food?”
“No, I'm fine on that stuff. Thank you Joonie, you're the best I love you”
“Love you too angel”
***
Namjoon had been there for Jin, has always been right where he needed him. He was jins everything, his always. He loved him more than anything, Joon was one of the few people he let see him like. Well like this, mopey and sad and wanting to get swallowed by the earth. Namjoon knew just what to do to make jin feel better, it was like his second nature. He had been there for his worst dysphoria days and he just fixed everything. Jin didn't know how he just walked into his life and was perfect for him, he truly was a gift.
Namjoon slipped away for a few moments and Jin was already pouting. He stopped when he heard the kettle come to life. He grinned at that, he knew his bug was doing what had become a sort of ritual. Namjoon wasnt great at mixing drinks of any kind, if they wanted coffee or alcohol, Jin was the go to, but Namjoon made the best fucking cup of tea. He also always had little tea cookies to go with it and it was the most comforting thing for Jin, other than Namjoon himself. He was excited when Namjoon came back with tea and cookies and turned on Netflix to play a stupid romcom that would probably make Jin cry. Jin loved his boyfriend so much, cherished him with his every breath, and hoped one day to marry him.