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Julie doesn't know how to shut up. They've been friends for a year -as much as Effy has friends, that is- since the first time the girl sat beside her and started talking. Effy could have been put off, but she was the only girl in the class wearing lime and black stripes, a look Effy approved of. Twelve months, and Julie has never closed her mouth for more than a minute.
It should bother her. It doesn't, it's fine. The things that should bother her don't, the things that shouldn't do. Effy knows it's backwards, but everything in her life is reverse.
She could even compose a list of reasons why it's fine. She doesn't write them down, a pen is just another way of talking, and there's no sense in that. In defeating herself. But her head is full of lists, tumbling over each other for recognition. Everything in her head demands her attention, at all times. Which is a reason she doesn't mind Julie talking at her. Julie thinks/knows Effy's not listening, and doesn't really try to get her attention, just talks anyway. It's one voice that doesn't demand at her.
It's fine because Effy doesn't really like silence. At home there's bickering and snarking and placating, because none of the Stonems really like each other. At school there's lecturing, teachers and principals and moronic guidance counselors. And in the night there's music and the click of flashing lights. But those in between times, the times of traveling, it would be quiet, if it wasn't for Julie following beside her and chatting.
It's fine because it's not opposing her. So often people talk to try to change her. It's part of the reason she likes drugs so much, they make it harder to hear other's voices, and they make other's voiced ideas so much lighter, happier, better. Even sober, Julie's talk is mundane, never any revelations or strong opinions.
It's fine because they fit. Julie isn't Tony, not by a long shot. No one could ever fit with Effy like her brother does. But as much as Effy is Tony, Julie is Sid. A faithful sidekick, that would be a best friend if a Stonem was capable of having one. For every person that is broken into cruelty, another person is damaged into thinking they deserve it. Julie can ramble, because in the end she'll do what Effy wants.
And finally, it's fine because when Effy gets Julie in the right mood, her chattering turns into the most delicious dirty talk Effy has ever heard. Determined to be tabooless, unshockable, Effy's watched a lot of porn, read a lot of things. And still Julie can give her a thrill.
She doesn't ever seem to care where she is when she starts talking. Julie can lean over in the middle of a lesson about the Middle East and whisper "I wish I had three of your long skinny fingers up my cunt." Or on the bus, on the way to a midnight rave, "You think that old todger would want me to kneel on the floor and lick your slit? I won't though, there's spilled Coke there and I don't want to ruin my tights."
No one ever seems to notice. Everyone has become used to Julie's infinite chatter, so no one listens and no one hears. Except Effy.
They bus to the storage facility, Effy burning the paint off the metal rungs, Julie talking, getting her back for her look at the homeless guy by walking her fingers up her thigh and under her dress. They don't do anything in the shadows of the industrial buildings, there's time for that later.
The place is more empty than Effy had thought it would be. She'd wanted a rave, and instead she gets riding on the back of a forklift. Still, it's a hundred times better than being at home, playing boardgames as their parents try to pretend they've raised normal children. Julie's a bit pissed now at being ditched, but she won't be later, when the green hooded boy gives Effy enough free supply for the both of them.
Except it doesn't happen like that. He gives her the first pill as they're flying together, and before she has the chance to scam more from his pocket, they're being arrested.
They're in the van when he says it. "Does she ever stop?" And Effy shakes her head no and rolls her eyes, because she wants a hit. It's weed and E, or at least she thinks it is, and when has not knowing stopped her from trying anyway?
She doesn't need to look to know that Julie's hurt. Even if it doesn't stop the flow of words, she is. So Effy exhales, white smoke filling the air, then crawls across the rough floor to kiss Julie's thigh. The striped hose sticks to her lips when she starts to pull away, then Julie's hands are in her perfectly mussed hair, pushing her back down.
"I could keep your head between my legs forever, you know that Effy? Really, forget about work or classes, just have you licking away forever. Or maybe I could still graduate, you could just sneak under my desk and have at when Mrs Fromme is talking. Would you like that Effy?"
She would. She really fucking would. Her hands snake up Julie's skirt, trying to find the band of the hose so she can pull them down. Julie's probably wearing pants, but those can come off too, if only Effy can find the top of the hose.
"Woah," green hoodie mutters though, and the moment is broken. Effy's not high enough for this. She can't listen to the voices of the two boys commenting -because they will comment, if they're stupid enough to say woah at a hand up a skirt naked skin can only be much worse- without being far more insulated by drugs.
She moves back beside green hoodie in one fluid motion. She quirks a smile at Julie and lets her know without words -because Julie never needs anyone else's words, just her own- that this will still happen. Just...later. When things are easier. Because those are the modes that Effy has, Tony or Julie or High.