Chapter Text
Perry sat up in bed, coated in sweat. No more sleep for him tonight. He looked around his room, the only light filtering in from the hall. Ever since he’d first moved in with the Flynn-Fletchers, Linda had always insisted on leaving the light on in the hall in case he needed to use the restroom. Shaking his head to clear it of the fog, he swung his legs out of bed and slipped on his fluffy teal sweatpants. Lawrence had bought them for him his first year here as a gag gift on Christmas because they matched his hair.
Enough of that, he tells himself. He checks his phone on the nightstand. No notifications, thankfully. 3:09 am. Again. He stands slowly, stretching his limbs. The black t-shirt he threw on the floor is still there, so he picks it up and slips it on. Grabbing his phone, he silently creeps down the stairs in order to avoid waking the kids.
By now, he’s learned where the squeaky floorboards are in the house. 6 years of living in a single location and having to sneak out for work at odd hours will do that to you. The darkness covering the house is warm and full, like a soft blanket. Peaceful. He knows where the pictures hang, where the cracks in the paint are, even where the spiders like to build their nests. This is the longest he’s ever stayed in one location. He hopes he and the kids won’t have to move soon.
Barefoot, he slides into the kitchen to start a pot of coffee. He won’t be able to sleep anymore anyway, he might as well get some paperwork done before the kids get up and see him. Maybe he can make them a nice breakfast. He sits alone at the dining table as he waits, pulling out his phone and scrolling through the apps for a bit. Nothing new. Nothing ever seemed new to him, ironically. He was a secret agent and had done so many things and yet recently, nothing seemed exciting. He barely managed to get through the days anymore. The stubble on his chin was growing out and his hair was unkempt, not just from sleeping.
The pot dinged and he quickly rushed over to silent it. As he stood by the back window getting his mug filled, he felt something was off. Training kicking in, Perry started listening. Silence. He looked around without making it too obvious.
Nothing. But he couldn't shake the feeling that something was seriously wrong.
He spared a casual glance out the window. The moon was full, it’s light bathing the backyard. He could clearly see the whole outline of the old tree that the boys made all their inventions under last summer. Even their favorite spots to sit as they contemplated their next project. But Perry saw it, just the littlest glint.
A phone behind the tree, in the moonlight. He should have known this would happen.
Fighting the wave of panic overcoming him, Perry came up with a quick plan. Taking his cup of coffee and leaving it on the table, he tiptoed to the boys’ room, making sure to avoid the windows. The door opened silently. Moving over to Phineas’s bed because it was closer to the door, he gently tapped his nephew’s shoulder a couple times.
Phineas’s bleary eyes opened, a small hint of surprise in their depths, masked by sleep. “Un-” Perry plastered one of his index fingers to the boy’s lips and the other to his own. Don’t speak. Young eyebrows knitted together and he nodded slowly. Wake up Ferb, pack your backpacks with 3 changes of clothes. Don’t make a sound. Meet me by the garage door in 5 minutes. Get your shoes.
Phineas looked a little concerned, but he didn’t have time to elaborate. He moved on to Candace’s room, silently thankful that she slept with a full change of nightclothes on. He moved to the bed and tapped her awake as he had Phineas just moments before. “Ugh, Mom, just five mo-”
Index finger to her lips. Her eyes snapped open, startled. Pack some clothes. No electronics. Put on your shoes. Grab Ducky Momo. Don’t make a sound. She opened her mouth again and he waved her off of it. Meet me and the boys by the garage door in 5 minutes. Avoid the windows. Remember, no noise. Now she looked downright frightened and he truly felt bad. But if he didn’t get them out now…
Perry didn’t finish that thought. They didn’t have much time.
He slipped back upstairs and grabbed his own backpack, stuffing it with 2 shirts, a pair of pants, some underwear and socks, and a tube of toothpaste. He slipped on his sneakers and at the last second, grabbed his extra hat - the one without fancy gadgets or trackers, his very first hat - and stuffed it in the back of his shirt. He left his phone on the nightstand and rushed back down the stairs, taking extra care to avoid the windows. He couldn’t risk them seeing him. He noticed his abandoned coffee on the table and momentarily felt regret at not finishing it. Damn it, now is not the time. He quietly opened the door to the garage and grabbed out everyone’s helmet. Then he took the tarp off his old bike. Perry looked at it for a moment, the realization striking him that he didn’t remember how much gas was in it. It had been three weeks since he had last used it.
He heard a slight scuffle of shoes and saw the boys both standing in the light of the moon to the entrance of the garage, slightly hunched so as not to be seen by the window. Candace? Perry signed. Ferb pointed back towards the bedrooms. He handed each of the boys their respective helmets and peeked down the hall to see Candace creeping ever so slowly towards him. He waved at her, gesturing for her to hurry. She scuttled along a little faster until she passed the window and reached the garage, at which point Perry softly shut the door and handed her the helmet. “Uncle Perry, what-” Perry waved his hands again, calling for silence. I’ll explain soon. Dangerous here. They can hear us.
The blood drained from Candace’s face and the boys looked visibly frightened, especially poor Phineas. Candace, closest to the handlebars but sit backwards. Ferb, against her chest. Phineas, against Ferb. All of you face backwards. The kids did as he commanded without a word. He straddled the bike last, taking Candace’s hands and clasping them around his middle. He finally signed, Whatever you do, don’t look. Trust me. Leave it all to me, just don’t open your eyes. Keep focused on my shirt. The kids nodded grimly, looking terrified.
He felt Phineas and Ferb wrap their arms around him too. Candace squeezed as close as she could against them. They were as ready as they could be. He pressed the garage opener on his bike and roared the engine to life. Before the door had even lifted all the way, he sped out of the opening and off into the street.