Chapter Text
‘Harry, will you please get up alread – OH MY GOD!’
Harry heard someone squeal loudly as the door of his dormitory hurriedly slammed shut. He blearily opened his eyes as he fumbled around for his glasses. For a second, he felt strangely cold before he realised that his sheets had been wrenched off him and were all on the floor. Suddenly, it all came crashing down on him. Hermione, who had taken it upon herself to wake him up on weekends due to his tendency to oversleep instead of joining her early in the library to study, has just seen the bottom half of his body naked. Not normally one to forgo underwear in bed, he had decided to quickly masturbate the previous evening in an attempt to exhaust himself enough to fall asleep, and he did not bother to put them back on when he finished. It did not help, of course, that what Hermione had such a reaction to was not just his nudity, but to the rather painfully engorged erection that he was currently sporting.
Feeling thankful that he was at least all alone in the dormitory, Harry slowly got out of bed and grabbed the first bits of clothes from his trunk. As he got dressed, he was struck with the realisation that Hermione will probably be too embarrassed to meet his eye for the rest of the day. Groaning and cursing his bad luck, he ignored the urge to take care of his morning wood, he tried to make himself look as presentable as he could before making his way downstairs to the Common Room. As he entered, he immediately spotted her sitting next to the window overlooking the castle grounds. Although she was hiding her face behind a large book, her fingers were gripping it with such force that it looked like she was about to rip it apart. Deciding to bite the bullet, Harry grabbed a chair and sat down next to her.
‘Morning Hermione,’ he said brightly, in an attempt to avoid the potential awkwardness that he was sure will ensue.
‘Oh, hello Harry,’ she replied in a rather high-pitched voice. The book was still covering her face. ‘Did you sleep well?’ she squeaked out.
‘Not bad, I guess. You?’ he asked.
‘Oh, you know, the usual,’ she continued in the same high-pitched voice. She then took a deep breath and lowered her book. Her face was flushed scarlet and was trying to not meet his eye. ‘I’m really sorry, Harry,’ she stammered. ‘I didn’t think ... I mean, I shouldn’t have woken you up like that.’
‘It’s ok, Hermione,’ he said gently. ‘I’m over it, and you should be too. Ok?’ He suddenly smirked. ‘Anyway, I rather you got a look at my goods than some rabid fangirl like Romilda Vane,’ he said teasingly. Hermione’s blush deepened even more as she spluttered out another apology. Harry shrugged nonchalantly and waved it off. ‘Where’s Ron, anyway?’ he asked in an attempt to change the subject.
‘Oh, he went down with Lavender,’ she scowled. The reddening of her face had now lessened to some degree. ‘Ever since those two got back together, he hasn’t been hanging around with us much. Have you noticed that?’
‘Yeah, I did. Still, nothing wrong with him getting some snogging done, isn’t it?’
‘Well, I suppose not. I guess I wish he waited a little longer ... you know?’
Harry sighed inwardly. He knew exactly what Hermione was referring to. Sometime after the war had ended, Ron and Hermione had a good, long talk about their feelings for one another and they had both eventually agreed to start seeing other people. While Hermione was seemingly taking her time to actually date someone, Ron had wasted no time in sticking his tongue down Lavender’s throat again when they all started their eighth year back in September. Harry, who had gone through a similar thing with Ginny (albeit in a more gentle and mature manner), couldn’t help feeling a little sorry for Hermione.
‘I do,’ he said quietly. ‘Still, we can’t really do much about him, can we? Besides, we’re both in the same boat, remember? You’re not alone in this.’ He patted her hand encouragingly.
‘I know,’ said Hermione softly. Her eyes briefly met his before slowly raising the book back up to her face. Harry started to gaze out of the window. He smiled as he watched Hagrid strolling around the grounds. He reminded himself to pay him a visit when he next had a free period.
‘Why are we, though?’ said Hermione suddenly.
‘Excuse me?’ asked Harry, with some bemusement.
‘Why do you and I have to be in the same boat? Why don’t you and I go on dates with people?’
‘Well, I don’t know about you, but I’m not really in the mood to be mobbed by a band of rabid fangirls,’ joked Harry.
Hermione sighed exasperatedly. ‘I’m sure there’s a girl out there who would actually like getting to know the real you, Harry.’
‘I honestly doubt it, Hermione,’ replied Harry dully.
‘Well, I’m not going to sit around while Ron goes around snogging Lavender,’ she huffed.
‘Ok, but what are you gonna do?’ asked Harry. ‘Wait, don’t tell me.' he added, before Hermione could interrupt him. ‘You’re going to find McLaggen again and try and get him to snog you in front of Ron, right?' he suggested with a grin. Hermione gave him a dark look. ‘I still remember how freaked you were at Slughorn’s party,’ he continued, snorting with laughter. ‘Or are you really going to consider going for Zacharias Smith this time?’
‘Don’t be so annoying, Harry,’ sniffed Hermione. ‘This isn’t about making Ron jealous again. This is about me moving on with my life. If I’m going to do this, I’m going to date someone who is actually nice to me.’
‘Like who?’ smirked Harry. ‘Us blokes are all perverts, you know.’
‘Well, I never saw you get up to much!’ retorted Hermione. ‘Or have you been secretly snogging Romilda Vane in a broom cupboard?’
‘Don’t be ridiculous!’ scoffed Harry. ‘As if I’d ever do anything like that with her.’
‘Well, you were with Ginny for a while so I’m sure you got up to some stuff,’ said Hermione with a raised eyebrow.
‘Well, I mean we did snog sometimes, but we did actually talk about different things a lot of the time, you know,’ said Harry. Now that he thought about it, a part of him was a little disappointed that he and Ginny never really went further than kissing.
‘Well, that’s good. That means you’re nice and considerate with girls,’ said Hermione as she interrupted his thoughts.
‘I suppose so,’ shrugged Harry. ‘Guess that means I fulfil your one criterion, don’t I?’ he said with a smirk.
Hermione rolled her eyes. ‘Sure, like you’d ever want to snog me, Harry. Don’t make me laugh.’
Harry blinked. ‘I mean, I’ve never really thought about it but why did you have to say it like that?
‘Come on, Harry! It’s so obvious that you have a type,’ said Hermione pointedly. ‘You like pretty girls with straight hair that love Quidditch. I’m clearly the opposite of that,’ she said, as she gestured to her bushy mane.
‘Don’t be ridiculous. You’re as pretty as any of the girls that I’ve ever liked,’ said Harry, giving Hermione an incredulous look.
A faint blush coloured Hermione’s cheeks. ‘Well ... I mean ... thank you.’
‘And you like Quidditch enough to come and watch us play!’ went on Harry. ‘That still counts!’
‘Well, of course I’m going to watch you play, you idiot. You’re my best friend!’ retorted Hermione, her faint blush having left her cheeks. ‘Not only that, but you’re also a really exceptional flier. I remember Viktor telling me how impressed he was with the way you took on that Horntail!’
‘Yeah, I remember him telling me that back in fourth year,’ said Harry. He quickly recalled the memory of Krum telling him how much he had impressed him during the First Task of the Triwizard Tournament, and how he had felt a little smug that a talented international Quidditch player of Krum’s stature had paid his flying skills such a sincere compliment.
‘Well, it’s true,’ said Hermione kindly.
‘Talking of Krum, why not date him?’ suggested Harry. ‘He always seemed taken with you. Hell, he even cornered me once and asked me if you were my girlfriend.’
Hermione sighed. ‘Honestly, I just don't really see us working long-term. He's really lovely, don't get me wrong, but I never quite felt the exact same way that he did. I'd rather we'd just remain friends.' She fell silent for a moment. ‘Remember that banner we made for your first-ever Quidditch match?’ she asked with a small smile.
‘Of course I do!’ said Harry. ‘That was such a cool banner. Didn't you make it change colour?’
‘Yes, I did,’ nodded Hermione. ‘It was quite a tricky little charm, but I think I did it ok.’
‘It looked great, Hermione,’ said Harry warmly. ‘Learning new spells comes so naturally to you. The rest of us tend to need more practice than you.’
‘Oh, hush,’ smiled Hermione, as her cheeks turned a little pink again. ‘You’re still much better at Defence than I am. And I still can’t cast a Patronus Charm like you do. The way you do it is really something else!’
‘Well, I can’t let you be good at everything,’ teased Harry. ‘Where’s the fun in that?’
Hermione snorted in reply. ‘You’re such a prat sometimes, you know that?’
‘I know,’ he said with a wink.
Hermione rolled her eyes again as she closed her book and looked out of the window. Harry copied her and found himself marvelling at how nice the weather looked. He missed flying ever since he had lost his Firebolt when the Order had rescued him from Privet Drive over a year ago, yet he still hasn’t felt comfortable enough to replace the broomstick that Sirius had bought him for Christmas in his third year.
‘Do you really think I’m pretty, Harry?’ said Hermione quietly.
Harry looked at her puzzledly. ‘Yeah, of course. Why do you ask?’
For some reason, Hermione was not meeting his eye. ‘Um ... can I be honest with you about something?’
‘Sure. What’s up?’ asked Harry curiously.
‘Well ... I’m not sure how to best put this but ... well, I sort of had a bit of a crush on you one time.’ said Hermione quietly.
Harry stared at her. His throat felt like it had dropped in the pit of his stomach.
‘You’re joking, right?’ he said feebly.
‘No, I’m not,’ she said as her eyes narrowed. ‘And I’d appreciate it if you didn’t mock me.’
‘I’m not mocking you; I swear!’ said Harry quickly. ‘It’s just ... you really had a crush on me?’
‘Yes, Harry. Is that so hard to believe?’ said Hermione.
‘Well, I mean ... well, you never said anything!’
‘Well, of course I didn’t! I knew I wasn’t your type and I didn’t want to jeopardise our friendship just because I had a crush on you,’ she said with a shrug.
‘But ... Ginny told me how you gave her pointers on how she can relax around me so she can get me to notice her! And all that time you had a crush on me?’ he said incredulously.
‘Don’t be so dramatic, Harry. I didn’t have a crush on you ALL the time.’
‘Well, when did you then?’ he asked.
Hermione took a while to reply. ‘Honestly ... I’ve always had a soft spot for you ever since I’ve known you,’ she admitted. ‘Although, if I had to pinpoint it, I think it started around fourth year. You and I had gotten a little closer since Ron and you were fighting and ... well, it just happened, I guess,’ she continued with a soft blush.
‘And when did you move on from me?’ asked Harry bewilderedly.
‘Well, it’s a bit of a long story,’ sighed Hermione. ‘I started giving Ginny advice about you and boys in general during that summer before our fourth year. I had gotten to know her a lot more by that time, and I could tell that she genuinely liked you for who you are. I didn’t have strong feelings for you at the time, so me helping her out in order to get your attention wasn’t something that I had an issue with. It did complicate matters a little later on when I realised how much I liked you though, but I couldn’t really do anything anyway since you obviously had a crush on Cho. That fact alone always held me back from telling you how I felt about you, although I did seriously consider telling you in our fifth year, but I changed my mind early on because you were still really into Cho, and I knew that Ginny wasn’t really over you even though she was dating Michael Corner at the time. And obviously, I knew Ron liked me, and I really liked him as well, despite him acting like a complete prat sometimes. And when I started to notice how much more confident Ginny was being around you, and how obvious that you were starting to like her too ... well, with everything that was happening at the time, you of all people deserved to feel a little happy for once.’
‘Ok, but you still haven’t told me when you actually gave up on me,’ pointed out Harry confusedly.
‘Well, I guess I officially gave up on you when you told me and Ron that you kissed Cho,’ she said quietly. This admission was like a slap to the face for Harry. Now that he thought about it, Hermione did seem a little clinical when she was asking him about his kiss with Cho back in their fifth year. He had chalked up her upfront attitude as a way to lessen his embarrassment. Instead, she did it to help her mask her own disappointment.
‘Anyway, that’s when I decided that I was wasting my time,’ she continued. ‘I had already started to force myself to move on from you before that time either way. I always knew that my chances with you were slim. I mean, I did wonder what it would be like to go out with you, but I never let myself get carried away, so it didn’t really hurt to move on from you.
Harry stared at her dumbly. ‘But ... why me? I’m sure there are better guys out there than me for you to go out with,’ he said feebly.
‘Honestly, there really aren’t Harry,’ shrugged Hermione. ‘You’re a really wonderful person. Aside from the fact that you’re intelligent and courageous, you also care so much about the people that you love. I’ve always considered it a privilege to be your best friend.’ She gave him another small smile before adding ‘And ... well, it doesn’t help that you’re also quite good looking. You’re quite a fanciable guy’.
Harry’s mind was spinning. Out of nowhere, he briefly recalled the conversation that he had with Ginny just after Dumbledore’s funeral, and how Hermione had given her advice to loosen up so that Harry would start noticing her. Never in a million years would he have ever thought that she did all of that because she just wanted him to happy with a girl that she thought was best suited for him. Yet why didn’t Hermione feel comfortable enough to tell him about her feelings for him? Had he completely overlooked her femininity to the point that she had to force herself to get over him because he was constantly making her feel like she was not enough for him?
As he ran through the moments that he shared over the years with Hermione, he couldn’t fathom how he had never picked up on the small hints that Hermione was giving him. The kiss on the cheek at the end of their fourth year, her constantly enthusiastic hugs, the sheer glee she exhibited when she thought he was made a prefect in their fifth year.
Maybe she thought it would be fun if you two got to have a little alone time together, said a little voice in his head.
‘And based on what I saw this morning, you’re clearly very ... um, well developed, if I do say so myself,’ ended Hermione as she blushed deeply; her last comment breaking Harry’s stream of thought.
‘Well, thanks.’ mumbled Harry. He felt his face turning warm at the thought of Hermione seeing his erection not even a half-hour ago.
‘You know, I actually feel a little relieved,’ said Hermione brightly. ‘I never told anyone about my feelings for you. It feels good to just let it out, you know?’
‘Mhm, sure.’ Harry was having a hard time focusing on Hermione’s words and felt himself concentrating more on her body. While it’s true that Hermione is not known for being athletic, she nonetheless had a lovely slim figure, and what Harry always suspected to be a nice chest. It’s not that he had never noticed these physical aspects about Hermione before but, prior to this very moment, they're not anything that he had ever really lamented on.
Still, no chest can ever beat the one that Susan Bones has, sniggered the same voice in his head.
To his horror, Harry felt his dick slowly stirring. He forced himself to think of anything that can distract him. He focused on a combination of his Aunt Marge, Umbridge and Ron’s nauseous farts after a particularly large meal. To his relief, he felt his dick settle down.
‘Do you want to head to the library, Harry?’ asked Hermione gently. ‘It’s just that I do have a lot of work to do, and I know you do as well’.
Harry nodded. ‘Sure, I’ll just go and get my things.’ He forced himself to not flee upstairs as a myriad of smutty thoughts threatened to expose themselves again in the form of another throbbing erection. As he entered his dormitory, he took a deep breath and sat down heavily on his four-poster bed.
How did I never notice? he asked himself furiously. What am I supposed to do now? He felt a stab of panic. Is this going to change anything? He forced himself to calm down before continuing to lament.
She liked me, he thought. She liked me, but she never said anything because she assumed I’d never like her back. But it’s not a problem, because she doesn’t have any feelings for me anymore. He paused to consider for a moment. For some reason, this thought made him feel a little disappointed. Ignoring this, he pressed on. Besides, she was probably just venting about how Ron had moved on from her so quickly. He felt a small prickling of anger towards his best friend. She deserves someone better than us. That much I know for sure.
Finally feeling a little less conflicted, he grabbed his bag and checked to see if all his books were in it. Feeling content, he straightened up and slung the bag over his shoulders as he made his way back down to the Common Room. Hermione, who was still sitting where he had left her, beamed at him as he descended. Harry felt a jolt in his stomach.
'Ready?' asked Hermione eagerly, as she made his way towards him.
'Impatient, are we?' joked Harry feebly, his mouth suddenly feeling very dry.
Hermione snorted derisively. 'Come on, we've already wasted enough time as it is. And I'm sure you'd like to grab some breakfast first.'
As she made her way in front of him to push open the Fat Lady's portrait, she lightly brushed against him. Harry stiffened in response. Inexplicable as it may seem, he was starting to realise that he could not stop admiring just how utterly beautiful Hermione Granger is.