Work Text:
It was Just My Luck that I would somehow get this job. I became an officer so I wouldn't have to deal with this but what do I get an assignment in the middle of nowhere looking for an artifact of some kind and they didn't even bother telling me what it was.
But I'm getting sidetracked. I should at least tell you my name right, wait you know what no instead. I'll just say my rank so whoever finds this accursed log won't be able to tell who it was made by and arrest me for treason. oh almost forgot my ranks lieutenant don't forget it.
Now where to begin how i ended up in this situation or after well because i have the time and whoever reads this is likely wanting all the juicy details i got stuck hunting for this artifact for the truly noble reason of i was nearest to the guy giving the orders who could make me do it that simple. Now they may have been an inquisitor but that doesn't really matter seriously they get an order from lord vader for them to personally see to it and just make me do it while sending up my location and a holo. I swear it made me actually want to just defect for a second but I'm still here without a promotion. I might add with minimal blood loss so that's fun.
Now i got sent away with nothing but a little freighter which was more than i was expecting honestly there was still at least half of it functioning when they gave it to me really who needs a fully functioning life support right… I do, I seriously need life support to breathe you idiots. I swear being sent on any sort of mission in this karking empire is practically a death sentence.
But I got down to the planet's surface as easily as I could with only half the landing gears still functioning. And that's when the real trouble started because when i made the mistake of putting the ship into low power mode but it refused to come online which caused so many issues down the line.But i pressed on because even if i couldn't get the ship back properly online i could still get a rescue as long as i completed the mission actually you know what let's talk about that the fact you can't actually get any sort of rescue if you don't complete the mission. Honestly I know we're expendable in the grand scheme of things but this kind of protocall just makes it sound like we don't exist in the first place.
But let's get back on track, so i started attempting to get to the coordinates in which i would find the ruins of some temple? I don't know but Honestly at the time i thought getting there would be the hardest part i was so wrong. Thing is I might sound whiny but the problem of where they built this accursed temple is that the ground opened up into absolutely massive chasm’s every few steps. It took me hours just to find a place to land really who would even think of living here the only redeeming quality was that the plant life at least seemed tame. Another time of me being overconfident in the fact the day could not get any worse. I legitimately wonder why so many planets produce vegetation that just so happens to A.Bite at people B.Attempt to poison people And last but most certainly not least C.Releases swarms of carnivorous insects ,That last one made me question my sanity Thankfully i was not its target Sadly i had to watch something being eaten by swarms of flying carnivorous insects.
So after learning the important lesson of staying away from any large plant life I made my way through the terrain over the course of about 4 days to the temple. Along the way I managed to escape a giant armoured amphibious creature. Climb a 24 meter cliff covered in what seems to be poisonous no flying insects. I have never been more thankful for the thick gloves I grabbed anymore than that nightmare of a climb And finally reached the temple and promptly found the very recognizable form of a nexu sleeping right in the middle of it. Now for most people they would just have permission to roll over and die but if i stopped at this point i was mildly sure the emperor himself would torture my soul for eternity. So I did the logical thing. I climbed up a pillar and pulled out a vibroblade screamed like a banshee had the nexu promptly sprint over to where I was and then I jumped.
On top of the nexu and drove the blade hilt deep into its eye now of course i couldn't get off scotch free that's just not how the galaxy works so i got a incredibly fun part of my abdomen with a new gift a almost 13 centimeter long claw gouged into it. Now thankfully the nexu was dead hooray but i also had to deal with the horrors that was the inner temple with an absolutely massive claw stuck in my side... Joy. Now i may have misremembered the next part a little due the blood loss but i'm pretty sure that when i went into the inner temple it and i am being completely serious here stopped being an underground temple and instead some sort of open sky weird art sculpture thing in the middle of the ocean. But as life will never be easy it also happened to have some sort of massive golem guardian. Now the thing didn't talk but it certainly moved... with its fist’s... into my abdomen... where the wound that i spoke of before resided now i regarded this a sign that things weren't going to be getting any easier.
So i had to go the long way round which included some sort of jumping puzzle in what seems to be space a regular moving puzzle that was extremely heavy and lastly a sheer completely smooth cliff thankfully i still had the nexu claw and i could just stab it and use the walls on either side of the cliff to hold myself up while i climbed. Thankfully there was nothing after this but what i think after all that a blue cube for an artifact is not worth it.But after i took it it was like a hadn't even taken a step after entering so that was nice. I quickly commed my superiors for a rescue and proof of mission complete and promptly passed out. I don't remember much after that because of the blood loss. Apparently when they found me they thought i was a corpse and only took me because they had to send my body back home boy did i surprise them when i woke up.
So here I am recuperating in the medbay That inquisitor actually got killed on a mission while hunting some what are they called? jedee oh well at least vader didn't kill me for “harming the artifact”. Well guess this concludes my absolutely horrible week end log.