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To your surprise, Lucifer slips your hand in his and pulls you through the crowd. Together you walk along the back wall of the ballroom, toward the patio doors, trying not to draw attention to yourselves. You feel a little guilty for leaving in the middle of Diavolo’s speech. The charismatic prince is giving his final address of the night, signifying the end of the school year, the end of your stay in the Devildom.
You look at the back of Lucifer’s head curiously. He hasn’t let go of your hand yet and he doesn’t say anything as he leads you to the end of the terrace, far enough that you couldn’t make out Diavolo’s words anymore. The two of you were alone. Nobody would dare miss the prince’s monologue… No one but you and Lucifer, it seems.
When his walking slows to a stop, you squeeze his hand questioningly, “What’s gotten into you?”
“I’ve been waiting all night to have you to myself,” Lucifer has a stern look on his face when finally turns to look at you, “You’re too popular with other demons.”
You chuckled, “Well, you’ve got my attention now. You’re the only one who would dare walk away from Diavolo’s speech. Do you think he’ll be upset at us?“
“Worry not. I’ve asked him to keep talking until we return. He could go on for hours about the exchange program’s benefits to balancing the three realms,” he smiled, “We have plenty of time.”
“You asked Diavolo to create a distraction?” a giggle slipped out of you at the idea, “Why Lucifer, if I didn’t know better, I might think you’re jealous.”
He gives you a sharp look. Maybe you shouldn’t tease him. Don’t ruin the moment.
You give him a warm smile, “I don’t mean to make fun of you. It’s very sweet and I’m flattered that you did this for me.”
A soft breeze blows through the calm night. Lucifer reaches over to brush a stray lock of hair out of your eyes. His hand lingers over your face.
After a pause, he rests his gloved hand on your cheek, “It’s your last night here. I want to speak with you before you leave, before it’s too late.”
Hearing his words, your heart ached. This is his final goodbye.
You lift your hand up to his face, mirroring his actions. You run your thumb across his cheek, waiting for him to continue. This will be the last time you are alone together.
Lucifer takes a breath as if he’s about to speak, but he exhales a soft sigh. His other hand moves to your waist, pulling you against him. He rests his forehead against yours, closing his eyes.
“We’re all going to miss you, so much,” he whispers. But he pauses, pulling his head back slightly to look into your eyes, “We don’t have much time left. I’ll be straightforward with you tonight.”
“I’ll lay myself bare before you, my walls torn down and my heart on my sleeve,” his deep voice rumbles, ”I will miss you dearly. I miss you already. Please, don’t go.”
His honesty leaves you stunned. You didn’t know what to say.
Lucifer lets you contemplate his words slowly. As your lips curve into a sad smile, he leans forward to close the space between your bodies once again.
Abruptly, you pull your head back before his lips could meet yours. You don’t need to look to know he’s anguished at your rejection. You know the same emotion is on your face. Instead, you bury your head in his neck.
You mumble your reply, “I’ll miss you too.”
Solemnly, he says your name.
Wrapping your arms around him in a hug, you murmur, “Don’t make this harder than it needs to be… Please, Lucifer.”
“Then I will only ask you one final time,” he arms tighten around you, “Will you stay-- Stay here in the Devildom, with me?”
“You know I can’t. You know it’s not a good idea,” you shake your head against his shoulder, “Nothing good can come of this.”
Tears start to gather in the corner of your eyes. You put a hand against his chest, separating your bodies. You try to step out of his embrace but he catches your arm, not letting you go.
“I will make it so only good will come of this: a union between us, a human and a demon; you, descendent of celestial blood, and I, fallen angel and Avatar of Pride. I will make it so nothing can get in our way.”
Conviction burns in his eyes. He has full confidence in himself. Lucifer, the Pride of the Devildom, can make anything happen.
But not this.
You don’t want him to make whatever ‘this” is happen.
Well, you do. But you won’t let him suffer like that. If you let this bond blossom, you knew he would be tied down to you, a mere mortal. He would spend the rest of his eternal life alone, mourning.
“Even if I stayed, this relationship is doomed,” your voice cracked as you spoke, “One way or another, it ends in heartbreak.”
You can’t bring yourself to meet his eyes so you turn away to face the palace gardens. His hold on you softens but he doesn't want to let you go yet. This is his last chance to convince you to stay by his side.
“I love you,” he declares resolutely, pulling you around to face him again so you can’t hide any longer, “Why do you reject me like this? Even Diavolo sends us his best wishes. We could be happy, together. Don’t push me away when I love you and you love me too.”
“No. You don’t,” you take his hand off your arm. Stepping away, you spit out the next words, knowing they were lies, “We are enamoured; we are infatuated with one another. But you don’t love me. There can be no love between a human and a demon.”
Lucifer’s breath catches in surprise. His eyes widen in shock, as if he’s been slapped. His lips tighten into a thin line, displeased.
You turn away, you can't bear to look at his hurt expression.
Standing apart from one another, your words hang in the air. As the silence rests heavily, neither of you speak. Faintly, you hear muted laughter coming from the ballroom behind you. You know you’re running out of time.
Finally, you turn back towards him. His eyes meet yours as if he’s been watching you this whole time. His face has returned to a mask of stoicism. But you notice the bit of tension in his jaw, the small wrinkle in his brow, and the slight twitch of his nose. He’s suffering.
The grief upon his face strikes at your heart. You know you were being cruel, renouncing feelings for you. Your words hurt you just as much as they hurt him.
This is how it must end. Nothing good will come from a relationship between an eternal being and a mortal.
Tears are spilling down your face now. You step forward into his arms again, this time you’re taking the lead. Your hands cup his face and turn it towards you.
Through blurry tears, you memorize the features of his face, the point of his nose, the softness of his lips. His face, crestfallen and melancholic, will be burned into your memory for the rest of your life.
You lean in to leave a soft peck on his lips. You don’t need to say anymore. You know he understands what you mean.
I adore you. I yearn for you. We can’t be together, but I will always cherish you. I will remember you for the rest of my short human life. I hope you will remember me fondly some day, centuries from now, and smile in retrospection of this year we had together.
He pulls you closer to him. The light pecks on your lips turning into deeper kisses filled with possessive longing and regretful sorrow.
It’s too soon when you pull away. You bury your head his chest and grip him in one last hug, making it count. Looking at him through your wet lashes, you see his eyes are damp as well.
Taking a deep breath, you pull yourself together. As you approach the doors to the ballroom, you look back to Lucifer once more. Your eyes land on his lips, mouthing a promise you will never hear.
You close your eyes and hurry into the castle, making your way to the bathrooms before anyone registers your tearful face.
Diavolo sees you return alone, without his most trusted confidant by your side, and he knows what’s happened. His speech ends to fervent applause from his party guests. With a slight nod to Barbatos, the prince slips away to his private quarters.
He finds Lucifer lounging next to the fireplace with a bottle of demonus in his hand and no glass in sight. Diavolo resists the urge to stop his friend from taking a swig directly from the bottle. Instead, he takes a seat and waits for Lucifer to speak.
Sighing, Lucifer grabs two glasses for him and drinking buddy. He appreciates the silence Diavolo allows him. It’s some time before he’s drunk enough to speak.
“I know she’s right but it saddens me all the same,” the fallen angel says it softly. It’s not often that he expresses his emotions like this, vulnerable to whoever was listening. He continues to ruminate, looking for the right words to say.
The prince is patient.
He’s done all he can for his closest friend, giving his favor and good wishes, promising his support for this unusual pairing of their realms. He wishes he could do more to grant Lucifer happiness but even Diavolo knew where to draw the line with his schemes and merriment.
It isn’t his place to mettle in the affairs of star-crossed lovers.
“I don’t intend to see her off tomorrow. You’ll have to open the portal for the exchange students’ departures.”
Diavolo isn’t surprised. He gives a slight nod, “If you’re certain.”
“I am,” Lucifer finishes the last of the drink before speaking again, somber, “I will not be stepping into the human realm for the rest of this century… or more.”
“I’ll delegate those tasks to some of your brothers,” Diavolo hums in thought, “Will you be alright tonight?”
Lucifer looks up from his empty tumbler at his prince. It’s the first moment of eye contact since they started drinking, “I doubt I’ll be all right for some time. But this will not stop me. The world continues; it will not slow for anyone. In time, I will be all right again.”
Again, Diavolo is not surprised. A lesser demon would collapse under the pressure of heartbreak, defeated and broken.
But Lucifer is pride. He is dignified in his vulnerability. His emotions are honest and true. His feelings do not make him weak; carrying the weight of them on his shoulders, he will stand taller than before. He is not ashamed.
The love between you and Lucifer is ill-fated but not wrong. His affection is unrequited but not to be scorned. He was rejected but he is not ashamed to yearn for one such as you, a human with no match in heaven or hell.
He is proud to have loved you, the only one worthy of access to his demonic heart.
He knows that no time or space can erase the year you've spent together.
For that, he is proud.