Work Text:
*i cant see me lovin nobody but you playing in the background* I can’t believe how many times i’ve listened to this song. It’s been a couple years since this whole “apocalypse” has started, I think that I'm 19 if I'm correct with how long it's been since this whole thing started. I wish i could say I have been alone this whole time, but luck just doesn't follow me, I was only 15 when this started, so i can remember what life was like before this all started but i guess that doesn’t matter anymore. Laws don’t have meaning anymore as far as i’ve seen, people barely act like people, more like the geeks and that's saying something since the geeks, or walkers as i've heard some people call em’ , eat people. Anyways, you’re probably wondering who I am , am I right? Who’s journey you’re following, well my name is Harper, I’ve been walking for a week, going south. I’m from DC but that shit was not safe anymore and i’ve always wanted to see the south. I had a car, so i guess i did get lucky for a little bit, but i guess that ran out.
Back to the now, i guess i should find a place to rest for a bit, i guess the next town i go to is the place i’ll rest. It’s been a while since I've gotten a good night's rest. I think I saw a sign about a town ahead? I guess I'll see.
Negans POV
These fucktards can’t do anything right without me being right there showing them exactly what to do. I just wanted to get my fuck on with at least two of my wives at some point today but i guess thats a hard fucking no. Dwight better stay the fuck away from me or he’s gonna get real close and personal with god ol Lucille, he probably thought i was about screw Sherrys brains out. I mean when has Dwight needed help on a goddamn run, that’s why I gave him these kinds of responsibilities. “Well what the fuck are we waiting for numbnuts?” I’m pissed as shit, i shouldn’t be here i should be balls deep in Amber . “Dwight, you and Fat Joey go check the blue house on the end of the street. Kevin and David, yall go check the pharmacy, and me and good ol Lucille here will go check this grocery store, meet back here in an hour.” They all nod and shuffle off, dumbasses. I head over to the grocery store, i hear a couple of moans and shit moving around, guess I can take this fucking aggression off on a couple of these dead fucks. As soon as i’m about to go i hear bodies drop on the inside, shit kinda sounds like someone is using a bat, or at least something like it. Huh. I peak inside and then I see her, shes gotta be 5’2 she’s a tiny lil thing that much is very obvious, looks young as fuck too. Can’t lie she looks very fucking hot, I should go introduce myself, she either has a group so i can take half THEIR shit or she at least is alone and can come back with me and i can wife her ass UP.
“HOLY FUCK , and here I was thinking i was the only one in the apocalypse with a goddamn bat as a weapon, fuck i gess i shouldn’t just assume, cause you know that does don’t ya? Makes an ass outta you an me! And no one makes an ass outta me even myself. Well i guess i should introduce myself, see doll my name is Negan and I would very much like it if you back to my place with me and my guys, we ain’t bad, we got food, we got beds, and you can stay safe, you won’t have to deal with these dead fuckers ever again, how about that?” Now this girl is either a fuckin mute or shes just in shock, why the fuck is she so quiet, i thought i saw her mouth moving when she was bashing those dead fucks heads in. “ uhh.. Are you serious? You have a community?” She kinda looks to be in fucking shock, but goddamn is she tiny, she looks like she hasn’t ate in weeks , “Yeah doll i’m serious, you should come with us, you can get yourself a nice meal, a shower because no offense doll” that got me a scoff “but you smell like the dead themselves.” She blushed the prettiest pink i think i have ever seen, “but you don’t even know my name? Which is harper by the way, and like i could totally be like a lunatic and just like everyone. Which i fucking won’t but should you really just invite whoever back?” well shit I mean i guess she does have a point, but she’s aboutta learn real quick not to question my fucking decisions.
I can already tell that this girl is gonna be a fun as fuck, shit i haven’t had anyone talk to me like that since the very beginning of this fucking nightmare. I’m just staring at her, gotta give her a good scare, she don’t know anything about me, and i could do anything to her, not that i would, im a monster but not that much of a fucking monster. “Well now doll, usually i wouldn’t let anyone talk to me that way but seeing as how i like you i guess i can let that slide. Now doll this right here is Lucile,” before i can get anything else outta my mouth, she starts laughing like i just told her the funniest goddamn joke in the apocalypse, now that shit just pisses me off.
Harper POV
I just could not hold back my laughter, like JEEZ i thought i was the only person that was crazy enough to name their bat. I look up at him and oh shit he looks hella pissed “
Look Negan was it? I was just laughing because i thought i was the only one to name their bat, I named mine Elias, after my dad, the last good thing i had in this fucked up world, ya know?”
I can see that he understands. “
Well shit doll, if i didn’t know better i would say that you were the female me, and whooo wee wouldn’t that just be the best thing. But as i was saying before this here is Lucille, and she likes to get bloody, she will not hesitate to bash your head in, me on the other hand would hate to see that happen, as you just so happen to be hot as fuck, but in front of my men you WILL not talk back to me like that is that understood?”
I didn’t even know he was right in front of me until i looked down, god he is the most attractive man i have seen since this shit show has started.
“ I uh, I understand, sorry about that i dont think ive interacted with anyother fucking person in god i think like 5 months. But i can assume you wanted to check this place out, i’m gonna be honest i didn’t see anything but if you wanna check again go right away bossman.”
I think this will be good, i can finally have a place to sleep without looking over my goddamn shoulder every two seconds.