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“Where the hell is it?”
“Where is what?” Kotetsu asked stepping into Barnaby’s bedroom, drying his hair with a towel, wearing Bunny’s robe.
“My white t-shirt, the one with the blue stripes on the shoulders. I can’t find it.”
“That’s probably because it’s at my place,” Kotetsu replied standing behind Bunny wrapping his arms around his bare midriff and burying his nose in his neck. Why did Bunny always smell so alluring?
“It is?”
“Mhm.” Kotetsu pressed a kiss to one pale shoulder. “I ironed it yesterday.”
“You don’t have to wash my clothes,” Bunny mumbled leaning into the touch.
“I have to do my own laundry anyway, I can wash a shirt or two more.”
“What else of mine is over there?”
“Next time you go to my place you can check your drawer in my closet.”
There was a moment of silence and the slightest stiffening in Bunny’s body but Kotetsu felt it anyway, how the tension slowly built. “I have a drawer in your closet?” Bunny asked, his voice carefully neutral. “Why do I have a drawer in your closet?”
Kotetsu shrugged glad that Bunny couldn’t see him, and tried to ignore his own feelings of unease and annoyance, at Bunny’s obvious reluctance. Kotetsu had more than once tried to bring up the subject of moving in together, and the discussion was shut down by Bunny every time they even got close to it. “I just noticed yesterday because I did all the laundry and stuff, and realized how much of it was yours. It just made sense to put them away instead of having them hanging around.”
“You should have told me, I could have gone and gotten them today,” Bunny replied easing up a bit, though the comment just served to fuel Kotetsu’s annoyance. Those little subtle comments Bunny made every time Kotetsu brought something like these up, were the ones that got on his nerves and even worse, worried him.
“I don’t mind. I have plenty of space and we are always switching back and forth from apartments. It’s good to have a few of your things over there. In any case,” Kotetsu quickly continued because he really didn’t want to have an argument, “aren’t we going to bed anyway? Why are you looking for clothes in the first place?”
“Because it’s December and winter is here and it’s cold.”
“It’s cold because you are standing in the middle of the room in your underwear,” he retorted, splaying his hands low on Bunny’s hips, his fingers teasingly going under the waistband. Bunny snatched the fingers away and turned to face Kotetsu.
“A moment ago you said that you weren’t up for it tonight.”
Bunny chided.
Kotetsu curled his lip. “A moment ago we were in the shower and you wanted to do something that I can’t right now with my leg.”
Bunny trailed a hand down Kotetsu’s body, stopping high on his thigh. “How is your injury?” he asked softly and Kotetsu smiled.
“The bath helped a lot with the pain," he answered truthfully and ran a hand over Barnaby's hair.
“Does it still hurt a lot?” Bunny asked, concern darkening his eyes and Kotetsu sighed. He took Bunny’s face in his hands, rubbing his thumbs over the cheekbones before leaning in to kiss him softly. He hated worrying him, hated seeing those brilliantly green eyes clouded with worry, the faint lines that formed between his brows. He wondered at times, how a man could be so obviously emotionally involved with someone, and yet be terrified of something as simple as a drawer.
“It doesn’t hurt too bad anymore, and it will be better tomorrow. I don’t even think it’s swollen anymore,” he reassured and moved the robe from his leg to look at it. He was right, the swelling had come down and all that remained was a nasty looking bruise. Barnaby trailed his fingers softly around the edge of the bruise, fascinated by the contrast of their skins.
“This is my robe,” Bunny suddenly noticed, taking hold of the lapels.
“Yes it is.”
“I wonder,” Bunny said, running his palm down Kotetsu’s chest, feeling the muscle underneath, “why I find it so arousing to see you wearing my clothes.”
“Do you now?”
“Mhm.” Bunny parted the robe, the loose knot undone easily, and kept exploring with his hand. The room was mostly dark, the light coming from the single bedside lamp and the window so that both of them were mostly just shadows. He pushed Kotetsu backward so he toppled onto the bed.
“Let me look at it,” Bunny said pushing the cloth out of the way and looked at his lover’s injury. Tiger had taken a bad spill earlier in the day falling from a second story. The suit and the last bit of his nexxt powers had saved him from worse damage, but Barnaby knew what falling from up high felt like. You might not necessarily bruise everywhere, but it rattled the whole body. He brushed the large bruise with gentle fingers and jerked his hand away when the leg quivered.
“It hurts worse than you are telling me, doesn’t it?”
Kotetsu shrugged and looked away. “It’s not like there is a lot you can do for a bruise.” At Bunny’s concerned and stubborn look he sighed. “Nothing is broken or badly damaged. The muscle and the tendon had been swollen so I feel a bit stiff. But the bone is okay, the injury is not that bad and the bath really helped. Now it's mostly just a bruise, I had the Doc at Apollon check it out to make sure. It will heal on its own.”
Bunny stretched out on top of him, straddling his good leg instead. “I don’t like seeing you hurt.”
“I know, I’ll try to be more careful.”
Bunny smiled softly at that. He always said the same thing; he never seemed to be able to keep his word.
“Okay. How about, I take care of you now, for a little bit,” he murmured and kissed Kotetsu, feeling the need to cherish him. Kotetsu smiled, embraced his lover and let himself be taken care of.
***
“You should have taken the day off.” Barnaby said the next day while they were leaning against the bike outside of the bank. A heist was in process, but the police and other heroes had arrived before they had which was fine by Bunny. The armor was as comfortable as armor could be, but it was still heavy and bulky and felt twice as confining if you were hurting. Kotetsu kept leaning on his "good" leg.
“Nonsense, I won’t let a little bruise stop me from being a Hero,” Kotetsu replied and Bunny, to prove his point, gave him a light tap with his fist against Kotetsu's injured hip, who let out a choked scream.
“You are putting yourself through unnecessary pain.” Barnaby chided.
“I’m just a bit stiff in the morning,” Kotetsu muttered.
“It’s past lunch already.”
Kotetsu sulked and crossed his arms. “It’s really not that bad and in my defense, I went to the office to catch up on paperwork.”
Bunny gave him a look that spoke a million sarcasms.
“Well it’s really not my fault that a bank robbery is taking place right now, is it?” Kotetsu tried to defend himself. "Besides we are just standing here. The police are handling the negotiations and every other hero is already positioned. We are back up to the back up. Nothing is going to happen!" Kotetsu finished triumphantly, which was exactly when the windows on one side of the bank exploded, and the suspects jumped out and into a van in seconds.
“Follow them!” Kotetsu said already jumping into the sidecar, but Bunny grabbed just stood there.
“Wait,” Bunny ordered and surely enough, Sky High and Fire Emblem dashed passed them only seconds later. He let out a breath of relief. “They have an advantage over us. Let us free the hostages instead.” Barnaby suggested. He would gladly lose the points if
“But-“
“You want to save people or catch bad guys?” Barnaby asked.
Kotetsu sulked and sighed for two seconds. “Help people,” he replied, climbed out of the sidecar and jogged towards the Bank together with Bunny.
“Thank god you are here!” A young police officer told them as they arrived at the entrance, worry edging on panic clear on his face.
“What’s wrong?” Bunny asked looking around for any threats. Were there more robbers?
“There is a bomb in there,” the office said.
“What?!”
“The bomb squad is already on their way but we need to get all the people out.”
“We’ll help!” Tiger said already running inside and Bunny swallowed his own concern.
“Where is this bomb?” Bunny asked another officer inside.
“Under the second cashier counter, and right behind that is the hallway with all the hostages.”
Bunny nodded and surveyed the situation quickly. The hostages were bound, hands and feet, and blindfolded and it was obvious that untying them would take longer than just carry them around. He took one look at his partner and nodded, their message transmitted wordlessly.
“Everyone except the bomb experts leave the building!” Kotetsu ordered.
“You take the women and the children,” Bunny told his partner, activating his power and promptly lifting two men, one under each arm, running out before Kotetsu could complain. He did so anyway, but obeyed, knowing he had to save his one minute for the very end. Between hasty runs, they carried everyone out. Bunny had dropped off the last of the hostages and ran back into the bank watching relieved how the bomb expert carried out the now defused bomb out.
“All good then?” Bunny asked stepping closer to Kotetsu who leaned against the counter.
“All good,” he replied giving a thumbs up. “Told you it would be alright. Didn’t even use my one minute.”
“Well you can’t blame me for-“ he started and broke off. A beeping sound suddenly reverberated in the large room. “Is that-“
“-another bomb?!”
“We should-“
“Get down!” Kotetsu suddenly shouted, activated his hundred power and threw himself over Bunny, embracing him and tackling him onto the floor, just as the bomb exploded somewhere behind him. The last thing Bunny saw before he lost consciousness were Kotetsu’s worried eyes of fierce blue.
***
Bunny woke up and stared at the ceiling, grey speckled tiles, dim lights. He blinked a few times before turning his head to a side.
Hospital.
He squeezed his eyes shut trying to remember the last that had happened. Assignment, bank, hostages, bomb, Kotetsu-
He opened his eyes again and sat up. The motion made him dizzy and he noticed the now dull ache on the back of his neck. He lifted his hand and touched the back of his head, felt the pain as soon as he did. Head wound. The curtains were drawn around him so that he couldn’t tell if he was alone in the room or not. Where was Kotetsu?
He sat at the edge of the bed, his stomach queasy and feeling dizzy. After taking a few breaths, he gripped the table and pushed himself up. His head spun immediately, the pain increased tenfold, but still he needed to know. He reached out with his other hand towards the curtain, wanting to push it away but it seemed as if it danced out of reach every time he got closer. Suddenly the beeping of the machines next to him increased, the sound so similar to the one he’d heard before the blast, and his knees went weak.
He was unconscious before he hit the ground.
***
He opened his eyes, blinked a few times and stared at the speckled ceiling. He was back in the bed, his head didn’t hurt as horrible as before, but he still felt queasy. He turned his head to the side, this time, the curtains weren’t drawn. The bed to the right was empty, the bed to the left was not. He raised himself, sitting up to look over to the other bed.
Kotetsu.
He sat at the edge of the bed, his head swimming again, but this time he planted both of his feet firmly on the floor. Breath deep, stand up, walk. He ordered himself over and over until his body responded. He stood up on quivering legs, gripping the table with a sweaty hand, and took a step. Then a second, a third, and then his energy left him. He was so close, so close, but his legs were weak, and stumbling lowered himself in the visitor's chair. So close and yet so far.
He looked at Kotetsu. He was sleeping, or at least looked like it. He was exhausted from worry and pain. He lifted his arm, wanting to reach over the bed.
He fell asleep without noticing.
***
Speckled grey in muted light, again. Barnaby turned his head to the side saw Kotetsu’s sheet covered legs. Also, the visitor's chair wasn’t empty. He sat up again, feeling less achy and dizzy, but still very sleepy and tired. The movement caused the visitor to look towards him.
“Barnaby.”
Ah, Kaede.
“Hello,” she said and walked to his bed. He leaned back against the pillows and watched as she rearranged his sheets. The act bothered him, the fact that she could see him like that, bothered him.
“He’s still sleeping,” Kaede suddenly said, as if reading his mind. “He should wake up,” she said determined, as if it depended on her willpower alone.
He opened his mouth to say something but the words somehow slipped through his mind before he could get a grip on them. She placed a small hand on his own, gripped it as if giving him courage. Why was that small gesture so terrifying? He wanted to yank his hand away. He didn’t want her to see him like this.
Suddenly, the beeping in the room accelerated, but this time it wasn’t on his side, it was coming from Kotetsu’s side. Kaede jumped up, raced towards her fathers' bed even as the room filled with people. A nurse pulled the curtains around his bed. He protested started to move, but all energy left him out of a sudden. His last thought was of Kotetsu.
***
Speckles on darker grey. It must be night. He turned his head, watched the bed, Kotetsu’s long legs, and next to him, Kaede.
He didn’t want to deal with it.
He went to sleep.
***
Speckles on light grey. Daytime. He sat up, so tired, so very tired. Why wasn’t he getting better? The chair was empty. He swung his legs over the bed, this time it was easier to stand up. He concentrated on the floor, left foot forward, right foot next. He took three, four, steps, and looked up. The bed was still far away. He frowned and looked back. It was as if he hadn’t walked at all.
“You should be with him.”
He turned around facing the voice. Kaede was standing there, next to Kotetsu’s bed. He wanted to be there, didn’t he? But he was so tired, so damn tired. He sat down, feeling exhausted and closed his eyes, trying to battle the fatigue back.
The fatigue won.
***
No speckles, just light. He blinked several times until the light shaped into a bright lamp. He sat up, swung his legs over the bed and stared at the other bed. Still tired, still fatigued, still exhausted. He just wanted to go over. All he wanted to do was go over and touch him. Why couldn’t he just go over and touch him? Why was that too much to ask?
“You have to reach him.”
He looked at Kaede standing next to her father’s bed. When had she come in?
“He can’t come to you, you have to reach him.”
Barnaby looked at her and then at the bed. She was right. Kotetsu couldn’t get closer even if he wanted to. He took a deep breath and stood up. Not dizzy, no pain, just tired. He shook his head. Fuck the fatigue. Four steps, that’s all. Four steps away from what he wanted the most. He kept his eyes on Kotetsu, still sleeping in bed. One step, two steps, breath, three steps, four steps.
There.
He reached out, his hand shaking, and gently laid it over Kotetsu’s open palm.
There.
He smiled through shaky breaths. He made it, he was there, with him. At last. His body shook with a strange feeling of other-worldliness, and something else, something he couldn’t name. But it was alright because his hand was in Kotetsu’s and everything would be alright now. Everything was always alright as long as Kotetsu was there.
He looked down to his left when he felt his other hand gripped in a much smaller one. Kaede was there, holding him or holding onto him, and looked at her father first before focusing on him.
“Talk to him.”
He opened his mouth but he words just wouldn’t form. He swallowed nervously, his hand in Kotetsu’s twitching involuntarily, the warmth of it comforted him.
“Call for him,” Kaede said, squeezing his hand and this time it did bring him courage.
He took a deep breath, swallowed and spoke.
“Bunny.”
***
Honey eyes.
That was the first thing Barnaby saw when he awoke.
“Bunny.”
Honey eyes and cinnamon skin.
“Ko-te-“ Bunny tried to speak but his throat was dry and his tongue felt thick. Kotetsu brushed a hand over his hair.
“Don’t worry, I’m here. It’s alright.”
Just then the door opened and a doctor followed by a nurse walked in. Kotetsu stepped away while they performed their checkup.
“Can you tell us your name? Follow the light,” the Doctor asked, testing his vision.
“Ba-Barnaby Brooks, what ha-happened?” Bunny said after he’d received water from a nurse.
“You don’t remember?”
Bunny shook his head, hissed at the pain at the back of his head. “The Bank, a second bomb?”
The doctor turned towards Kotetsu. “You said there was only one explosion.”
“There was just one,” he stepped closer again, taking Bunny’s hand in his. “You remember about it then?”
“It went off- you jumped over me- moron-“ Barnaby said frowning annoyed. Kotetsu smiled though his eyes didn’t quite hide his worry. He squeezed the hand within his own.
“Not that it did any good. The blast launched us across the room, I got thrown out of the window, you hit one of the columns, half the building fell on top of you. Your helmet-“ he stopped to clear his voice that had gone thick, “your helmet got smashed, don’t know if it was the blast, the impact, I don’t know, you were unconscious when I got to you.”
Bunny lifted a hand to his forehead. “But I woke- you were in the bed next-“ he turned to look at the other side. It was a single bed room, “-to… me…”
“You’ve been unconscious all this time, Mr. Barnaby,” the Doctor explained.
“How long?”
“Around 40 hours. But, you seem to be well on your way to recovery now. We will have to keep you for a while longer, however.” The doctor finished updating the chart while the nurse adjusted the medication and ordered rest for Barnaby.
The moment they were alone, Bunny fidgeted, trying to sit up.
“Be still,” Kotetsu ordered, gently pushing him back down.
“I’m fine-“
“You are not,” Kotetsu said a bit more forceful than usual and Bunny stopped. He looked at Kotetsu then, who was still standing next to him, his hand clasping his own. Was it just him or did he seem somehow older?
“Are you alright?”
Kotetsu smiled softly squeezing his hand gently. “A bit tired.”
“Did you get hurt?”
He shook his head. “Got rattled, have a few more bruises, but I had my hundred power on. I’m okay.”
Bunny sighed and closed his eyes for a moment. “I dreamt about you,” he said suddenly remembering.
“Oh?”
“I dreamt you were in the bed next to me. Kaede was there too.”
“Kaede?” Kotetsu blinked surprised.
“Why is that so surprising?”
“She was really here.”
“She was?”
“She was coming today, don’t you remember?”
Bunny frowned. “Oh right, Christmas shopping.”
Kotetsu rubbed a thumb over the hand. “She was so excited about going out with you. She saw the blast on the live feed and came right over, she arrived last night and was here until a few hours ago, when I drove her to my place so she could sleep for a moment. She was really worried about you.”
“Oh, I’m sorry…”
Kotetsu shook his head. “She talked to you the whole time.”
Bunny thought back on his dreams, tried to remember what she said. Had he dreamt it? Had he heard her? Had reality and dream merged in his unconsciousness? The questions were giving him a headache. It must have shown because Kotetsu leaned to kiss his forehead softly.
“Stop thinking and sleep.”
“I’ve been sleeping all this time,” he replied grumpily but closed his eyes anyway.
“Being passed out and sleeping is not the same thing.”
“Hm,” he sighed and when he felt Kotetsu starting to shift away, he gripped his hand. “Stay?”
Kotetsu smiled. “I’ll always stay.”
But when he moved to sit the visitor's chair Bunny tugged him back. “Stay closer,” he said almost petulant and when Kotetsu smiled this time it reached his eyes. He sat on the bed then, next to him, so that the blond could press his face against his side.
“Is this good enough?” Kotetsu asked but Bunny had already fallen asleep, his hand still gripping his own.
Kotetsu looked at him, the pale face going slack with sleep, the bandage thick around his head, so that the curls poofed out messily, hanging out in dirty lumps against the white sheets. He twisted a curl around his finger, feeling the uncontrollable urge to wash it, so that the hair felt soft again, like it should, wash away the dirt, the blood. He could still see it, the buried figure under all the debris, the shattered helmet, the blood. He swallowed several times before he let out a shuddering breath and closed his eyes.
“He’s alright. He’s just fine,” he said to himself, heard the tears in his own voice, and hoped the words would will away the images that kept forming in his mind.
***
The light was almost blinding and Barnaby blinked several times to adjust his vision. He looked at his hand, curled it instinctively when he saw it was empty. He was alone in the hospital bed. He sighed and closed his eyes again, thinking that maybe he should go back to sleep if he was just going to be alone. However, he wasn’t tired at all, in fact, he felt much better compared to yesterday.
He sat up and the movement didn’t cause him any pain or dizziness. Feeling bold, and antsy, he swung his legs over the bed, having a vague sense of déjà vu as he did, and slowly slipped down until his feet touched the floor. He gripped the table with a hand to steady himself, and let out a breath. He was about to feel victorious when the dizziness overcame him and it came with a curious loss of energy. He sat back down and closed his eyes, trying to stop his head from spinning.
There was a soft knocking before the door was opened and the nurse entered.
“Mr. Brooks- what are you doing?”
“Sitting.”
“You should be lying down,” she said and Bunny would have replied except he noticed the nurse hadn’t arrived alone. “There is a visitor for you.”
“Kaede,” he said surprised.
“Hello,” she said a bit shy, as if wondering if she was welcomed or not and Barnaby sighed inwardly. That was his fault too. “How are you feeling?”
“Better,” he replied and let the nurse fuss him back into the bed welcoming the distraction. Kaede stood near the door, flowers in her hand, and still not knowing if she should stay or go. “You brought flowers.”
“Ah, yeah,” she nodded and stepped closer. “I wanted to bring you something and- I mean- I know men don’t like flowers- but- I thought- maybe- and Dad-“ she stammered getting more and more flustered with every word and her nervousness for some reason calmed him.
“I like flowers,” he simply said taking the bouquet and brushed the petals with his fingers. “You didn’t have to bring me anything, but thank you,” he continued and when she let out a sigh of relief he smiled.
“The doctor should be here shortly,” the nurse said after she was done with the checkup and ordered him to finish all of his breakfast once it arrived.
“Kotetsu told me you arrived yesterday- the day before yesterday,” he said after they’d been left alone.
“Yeah I saw what happened. I mean, I was watching Hero TV I saw-“ she broke off, her hands gripping the sheet nervously. “You and Dad were inside and then the whole thing collapsed and they said Dad was okay but they couldn’t find you and- and-“ she broke off again, biting her lower lip.
Barnaby looked at her for a moment. She had been worried about him. This child who was still mostly a stranger to him, had been worried about him, enough to catch a train and travel from another town to come see him, had stayed at the hospital throughout the night.
The memory of his feelings in his dream shamed him now. He hadn't cared about her at all.
“I thought-“ she said, her teary voice hitching.
He was a moron. What kind of man was he if he could make a girl cry like that? What kind of man was he if he couldn’t offer her comfort? What kind of man was he, if he couldn’t understand that they were so much more already than what he had been pretending?
He sat up, moving closer to her, and reached out to pull her close. “I’m sorry,” he said and heard her give out a muffled hiccupy sound.
“I was so worried,” she mumbled against his chest and he stroked a hand down her hair.
“I know, I’m sorry, I’m okay.”
“Really?”
He smiled. “Really. So don’t cry anymore, please.”
“I’m not crying,” Kaede muttered after a moment and Barnaby smiled fully at her teary bravado.
“Okay,” he said and released her when she moved away. Sure enough, her eyes were dry. Red and puffy, but dry.
“Okay,” she repeated with a nod and brushed her hands down her clothes. “So, how long are you staying here?”
“The doctor will say, though I would rather leave as soon as possible. I don’t like hospitals,” he added at her curious look. “How long are you staying?”
“I have to go back today, I’m supposed to be at school.” Her petulance endeared him.
“I’m sorry we didn’t get to do any Christmas shopping.”
“We could still do it later…” she said looking at him hopefully.
“Yes, we will,” he promised firmly.
“As soon as you get better, deal?”
“Deal. By the way, how did you get here today?”
“Oh, I came with Dad. He had to do some sort of paperwork downstairs. He was with ouhm, Mr Lloyds? I don’t know, he told me to come up ahead.”
“Ah I see,” he replied and pondered a moment before he continued, “how is he really? I asked him but… you know him.”
“He’s okay, you know, just a few cuts and bruises but…” she trailed off uncertain.
“But?”
She seemed to wage a small battle before giving in. “That night, he was really worried, kind of panicking. He didn’t leave the hospital until yesterday when he dropped me off at the apartment. He was so worried because you wouldn’t wake up. He didn’t say anything but…” she shrugged.
Bunny brushed a hand over her hair. “Don’t worry, I won’t tell him you told me.”
They were interrupted by a knock on the door and then Kotetsu promptly walked in. “Good Morning!” He greeted cheerfully, opening the door wide and stepping to a side to let the nurse walk in with a tray. “I brought breakfast!”
“Dad, don’t be so loud.”
“Ah I’m sorry,” he apologized stepping towards the bed, placing a hand on Bunny’s shoulder. “How are you feeling?”
“Good,” he replied and looked at Kaede feeling at last, at peace. “More than good actually.”
“Really or are you just saying that.”
“Dad!”
“I’m really feeling good,” he gave Kotetsu a glare, “and hungry.”
“Then eat, while I go drop off Kaede.”
“You have to go already?”
“Yeah, but I can get to the train station on my own, Dad, I got here on my own didn’t I?”
“Yes, and you will never do that again,” Kotetsu chastised and Kaede rolled her eyes.
“Let him drive you to the station, otherwise, I won’t hear the end of it,” Barnaby interceded, doing his best to sound put out.
The teen sighed defeated. “Fine,” she said entirely unhappy by it.
Bunny smiled and stroke her hair again. “Have a good trip home. We’ll go shopping once school is over.”
“Okay, get well soon. Tell Dad to take care of you properly.”
Barnaby looked up then, his eyes warming as they met Kotetsu’s.
“He already does.”
***
“I’m leaving.”
Kotetsu raised his brows as Bunny crossed his arms trying to look menacing while he squinted at the doctor and the nurse applied fresh bandages to his head. The hair poofed out around it.
“Mr. Barnaby, I strongly advice against it.”
“What is going on?”
“Mr. Kaburagi, maybe you can talk some sense into your partner.”
“I doubt it, once he makes up his mind, nothing can change it back.”
“Mr. Kaburagi, though Mr. Brooks has improved greatly, it is still inadvisable for him to leave the hospital.”
“I passed all the tests.”
“Could I talk to you, outside?” Kotetsu asked the Doctor, already stepping out. “How is he doing, really?”
“As I said, he has improved vastly, surprisingly so, but he suffered a serious head injury and it shouldn’t be taken lightly.”
“But he is getting better right?”
“He is but-“
“And he could go home today?”
“I strongly advise against it, and even if he does, he is not to be left alone.”
“Listen, Doc, he doesn’t do well in hospitals. He’ll recover much better at home, and he wouldn’t be alone. How about he stays for the rest of the day, and release him in the evening. Do tests or something, make sure he’s good enough to leave, he’ll just fight you otherwise.”
The Doctor eyed him for a moment and then shook his head. “Alright, but at even the slightest symptom he comes back here.”
“Promised,” Kotetsu said grinning.
“I’m only agreeing because recovery does indeed depend greatly on comfort. I will give you detailed orders regarding his care.”
“Anything you say Doc,” Kotetsu agreed and then stepped back into the room.
“I’m leaving,” Bunny repeated still squinting and looked overall like a cranky child.
“If you pass all the tests, and the Doc thinks you can handle in-home care, then yes.”
Bunny narrowed his eyes. “You are suspiciously agreeable. What are you planning?”
“I’m not planning anything. I’m not a big fan of hospitals either. If you aren’t comfortable here, there is no point in you staying here.”
“What’s the catch?”
Kotetsu smiled softly. “The catch is, that you can’t be alone, so I’ll be taking care of you. That’s not negotiable.”
Bunny made a strange expression then, one Kotetsu had never seen before, something between embarrassment and relief, and fiddled a bit with the sheets. “Okay.”
Kotetsu raised his brows surprised. “Okay?”
“What, did you change your mind already?” Barnaby asked sulking and it made Kotetsu feel better.
“Of course not,” he said taking Bunny’s hand. “I’ll be leaving after lunch then, to pick up a few things before we go to your place.”
“You don’t have to- I mean- your place…is…fine,” Bunny stammered feeling suddenly embarrassed, but he wanted comfort and warmth and feeling safe, and he didn't feel that way in his apartment.
Again Kotetsu was surprised. “Are you sure? My place has stairs and wouldn’t you feel more comfortable in your own apartment?”
“I want to sleep in your bed,” Barnaby said earnestly and felt his face grow warm at Kotetsu’s blushing face. He hadn’t really meant it that way.
“I-ah-okay, if you want to, then my place it is. Do you want me to go pick something up from your place?”
“No that’s alright,” Barnaby sighed and leaned back against the pillows, closing his eyes. “Half my stuff is over there anyway, isn’t it?” He added with a soft smile that made Kotetsu go soft inside.
Kotetsu's heart did a lovely slow roll in his chest and he felt like melting. “All your favorite shirts are,” he said overwhelmed with feelings and glad that Bunny wasn't looking at him.
“There you go,” he mumbled before drifting off to sleep, his hand still in Kotetsu’s.
***
“How are you feeling?”
“If you are going to be asking me that every 5 minutes I’ll just go to my place,” Bunny replied surlily as they stepped into Kotetsu apartment. “And I can walk on my own,” he repeated for the tenth time, shaking Kotetsu off and making a point of crossing to the living room slowly, but on his own.
Kotetsu clenched his jaw but let him go on his own. There was no point in aggravating him, and he had indeed walked very well on his own all the way. He closed the door and walked to the kitchen, a grocery bag in his hands.
“Do you want to eat anything?”
“I’m not hungry.”
“Alright then let me just put these away and-what the hell do you think you are doing?” Kotetsu demanded when he noticed Bunny taking the first step of the stairs.
“Going upstairs,” Bunny snapped back, holding onto the rail while Kotetsu rushed towards him. Bunny was pissed off. He was annoyed at his own weakness, at the feeling of helplessness he’d had ever since he’d awoken in the hospital at that constant worry Kotetsu had been carting around. And fueled by that annoyance, he took another step, but something went wrong. He stumbled and the world spun dizzily. But before he even registered what had happened, Kotetsu was already there, holding him up in his arms.
“Stop it, damn it, Bunny,” Kotetsu said angrily and Bunny tried to shake him off.
“Let go, you are just overreacting-”
“You could have died,” Kotetsu suddenly shouted and his hold on Bunny’s arms was almost bruising. “I thought you died,” he sobbed and the memory came rushing back. The image, the blood, those horrible fifteen seconds it had taken him to get to Bunny, to check his pulse and the fear, the paralyzing fear had come back tenfold. “Damn it, Bunny,” he said choking up on the last word, and Bunny watched as this man, this strong man who had weathered everything, who’d faced his own death with more aplomb, was fighting back hot tears that had him hiccupping out sobs.
“I thought I had lost you,” he said in a shaky voice, lowering his head onto Bunny’s shoulder, not releasing his grip. Bunny was silent for a moment, feeling once again a fool. He knew, didn’t he? He knew exactly what it was like to feel his partner slip away from his fingers. Hadn’t he cried bitter tears himself? Hadn’t he shook with the unbearable pain of losing him? Hadn’t he felt as if something had broken and wilted inside of him when Kotetsu had closed his eyes that one time he’d been in Bunny’s arms?
“I’m sorry,” Bunny said softly and wondered if he’d ever really stopped feeling that fear because that’s what the problem was, wasn’t it? That horrible fear that felt like icy spikes in the belly, that paralyzed the body and froze the soul. Even now, after all they had been through, he was still terrified. “I’m sorry,” he repeated and wound his arms around Kotetsu, leaning his cheek against his head.
Kotetsu let out a shuddering breath, finally easing up on his grip and lifting his head to face him. “Do you have any idea what it’s like, having to just sit there and do nothing, nothing, except wait?” He wondered stepping back to look at his hands. “This power I was born with was worth nothing while you lay in the hospital. These hands could do nothing to fix you, I could do nothing to help you, except sit next to you and wait and hope. I could do nothing.”
“Kotetsu-“
“I won’t lose you.” he suddenly said determined, clenching his hand into a fist. “I won’t let you go. Do you understand that?” He asked and Bunny understood that they were talking about so much more than injuries.
Bunny nodded and stepped closer taking Kotetsu’s face in his hands. “I do,” he said. “I won’t either,” he added and rested his forehead against Kotetsu’s. Kotetsu let out a breath and swung his arms around Bunny, burying his face in his neck and finally giving in to the impulse he’d had for days, pulling him close to him.
“Bunny,” he said, that single word carrying a million feelings, a thousand messages and Bunny embraced him back so that there was nothing between them.
“Me too,” he simply said and both of them stood like that at the foot of the stairs, one holding onto the other, steadying each other.
“Let me take care of you,” Kotetsu murmured running his hands down his body, pressing a soft kiss against his cheek, “Let me always take care of you.”
“I can do that,” Bunny replied just as quietly and then Kotetsu was stepping away slightly. Bunny
felt his legs being swept away from under him, and when his head stopped spinning he noticed Kotetsu was carrying him now.
Princess style.
Bunny turned his head and curled his lip at Kotetsu, who was smiling. “This is your idea of taking care of me?” He asked and Kotetsu nuzzled his cheek.
“You have no idea, how long I’ve been wanting to do this.”
“Taking advantage of an invalid is not very heroic, old man,” he retorted cuddling closer.
“Carrying your injured partner is totally heroic,” Kotetsu argued, sounding more like his usual self.
Bunny sighed trying -and failing- to sound put out as Kotetsu carried him up the stairs. He rested his head against Kotetsu’s shoulder and closed his eyes, opening them only until Kotetsu laid him carefully on the bed.
“You should sleep,” Kotetsu said trailing his fingers over Bunny’s cheek.
“I’ll sleep better if I’m not smelling like a hospital.”
“Is that your way of asking me to undress you?” Kotetsu asked amused and Bunny pouted.
“I can do it myself but someone insisted on taking care of me,” he said but Kotetsu was already unbuttoning his shirt, unbuckling his belt, removing the trousers. Within minutes he had him under the sheets.
“Anything else?”
“The bed is cold.”
“It will warm up soon.”
“If I wanted to sleep alone in a bed I’d have stayed at the hospital,” Barnaby said with a pout.
Kotetsu grinned and quickly got rid of his own clothes before climbing into the bed and dragging Bunny close. “Anything else?”
Bunny was quiet for a moment, trailing a finger absently over Kotetsu’s arm. “You haven’t even greeted me properly since I woke up.”
Kotetsu blinked puzzled. “Greeted?” He wondered and Bunny looked at him and he recognized that face immediately. It was one of the first Bunny-expressions he’d learned over the past year, one he found endearing and very hard to resist.
“Ah, greeted,” he said and with a finger under his chin, tipped Bunny’s head back. “Welcome home, my Bunny,” he whispered close to his lips, before pressing them against his own in a soft and tender kiss. Barnaby closed his eyes and curled his fingers around Kotetsu’s wrist.
Home, at last.
***
Barnaby woke up feeling for the first time since his hospital stay, like he’d actually rested. The sun was falling in his eyes, as it usually did in Kotetsu’s apartment, but his head was pillowed on Kotetsu’s warm chest that rose in the slow rhythm of sleep. He shifted slightly closer since he was feeling cold, and sure enough, Kotetsu’s arm circled his shoulders to keep him close. He looked up at him and as he’d guessed, he was still asleep. Unable to resist, he pressed a kiss on his jaw, and then left a trail of them down his neck until Kotetsu stirred.
“Hello,” Bunny greeted and smiled when Kotetsu sleepily rolled them to a side to embrace him closer.
“Mornin’” he mumbled closing his eyes and burying his nose in the blond locks. He’d missed that, he’d missed having Bunny in his arms and through his sleepy brain came the memory as of why they had spent the last days apart. Even the vague memory made him apprehensive enough to pull him closer.
“I missed this,” Bunny echoed his thoughts and the statement so unusual from his partner, had Kotetsu opening his eyes.
“Did you?”
Bunny nodded against his chest, his finger tracing idle patterns on the warm skin. “I don’t sleep well if you aren’t here with me,” he confessed and Kotetsu lifted his brows in surprise. Bunny rarely talked about things like that, about feelings that involved the two of them.
“I take it then, you slept well?”
“For the first time in days,” Bunny sighed cuddling closer. “I’m feeling much better too, before you start asking,” he added with a slight sulk and Kotetsu smiled.
“Really?” He asked and rolled so that he lay on top of Bunny, holding himself up on his hands to peer down at Bunny, who narrowed his eyes trying to focus his gaze.
“Yes, really, I’m even hungry.”
Kotetsu grinned, lifted a hand to tuck away an errand blond curl. “Is that a hint?”
“It’s not a hint, I’m blatantly telling you I want breakfast.”
Kotetsu laughed and leaned down to place a soft kiss on Bunny’s surly lips. “You want something tasty or nutritious.”
“You know, they aren’t mutually exclusive.”
Kotetsu seemed to be ignoring him though, as he made up his mind. “I think pancakes would serve well. Heaps of pancakes,” he said and stood up.
Bunny’s snide remark was lost however as he noticed Kotetsu’s torso. There was a large bruise mottling the flesh over the ribs. “What the hell happened?” He asked and sat up as well, moving to the edge of the bed. Kotetsu looked down and cursed under his breath.
“Well, there was this explosion…” he started and sighed at Bunny’s no-nonsense face as he stood up. “It’s really not that bad, just a bruise-“
“It’s not just a bruise. Did you break any ribs?” He wondered and trailed his fingers lightly over the purple flesh, making Kotetsu hiss.
“Nothing is broken, just bruised. Please don’t worry,” he pleaded and took Bunny’s hands in his own to lift them to his lips. “I’m fine, honest. You don’t have to worry about me.”
“Of course I don’t have to, I do anyways, you moron,” Bunny said lowering his forehead onto Kotetsu’s. “You really aren’t fit to be on your own.”
Kotetsu smiled pulling Bunny’s arms over his own shoulders. “I keep telling you that I need my partner,” he said teasingly.
“I’m starting to believe it,” Bunny replied and there was nothing teasing in his tone. The odd seriousness of the statement threw him off slightly but then Bunny shook his head slightly and kissed him.
“I’ll go shower.”
“I’ll shower with you then.”
“Didn’t you promise me pancakes?” Bunny asked as Kotetsu pulled him into the bathroom.
“I didn’t promise anything. Besides you need someone to wash your hair.”
“Believe it or not, I have been doing that on my own for a while now.”
“You have a head wound that needs to be tended too. Stop being impossible already and let me take care of you.”
Bunny was going to protest longer but then Kotetsu was stepping out of his boxers and into the shower and really what was the point of arguing if he could share a shower with a man who had such a magnificent ass?
His lust turned tender, however, when he saw that in spite of what he’d said at the hospital, Kotetsu had indeed stopped by Bunny’s apartment to bring several of his personal hygiene items, like his hair products and favorite body wash. Bunny smiled. The man really couldn’t follow any orders, could he?
The shower took twice as long as it should have and there was a lot more groping than washing going on, but in the end, even Bunny had to admit that a long shower full of caring and fun did wonders on injured men. Kotetsu tended to the wound, blow-dried his hair (Bunny told him he did it wrong) and added a fresh bandage.
When they stepped back into the bedroom, clad in loosely belted robes, Bunny stopped on the threshold, fisted his hands on his hips and turned towards Kotetsu.
“You said I had a drawer.”
“What?”
“Before, you said I had a drawer. Which one is it?”
Kotetsu blinked surprise and gestured towards the chest of drawers. “It’s ah, the second from the top.”
Bunny stepped towards it, slid open the drawer and pursed his lips. “Hm.”
“What?” Kotetsu asked weary, not knowing what Bunny was all about.
“This won’t do.”
“What won’t do?”
“That drawer. It’s too small. In fact, the bedroom is too small for the two of us.”
Kotetsu stared at him completely confounded. “Huh?”
“And though I really don’t have any furniture, I need more light in an apartment.”
“Huh?” Kotetsu repeated dumbfounded.
“So we’ll have to look for something else,” Bunny concluded closing the drawer and walked towards Kotetsu who still stood at the door looking bewildered
“Also, this place is too small for the two of us. I’d need a proper office for once, plus more storage and a work-out designated area and of course,” Bunny stopped in front of Kotetsu to run a finger down his chest, “a room for Kaede for whenever she comes to visit.”
Kotetsu stared at him wondering if it was a dream, if Bunny was playing with him. But Bunny was looking at him and behind the bravado, there was nervousness reflected in his eyes. “What,” he cleared his throat, “what are you saying?”
“I’m saying that if we want to start the new year in our own apartment, we’d best start looking now,” Barnaby said, confidence betrayed by the uncertainty he hid by looking away.
Kotetsu grabbed his arms, squeezed them as if trying to make sure this wasn’t some sort of hallucination. “You want to move in together.”
“Yes.”
“As in live together, the two of us, in one place.”
Kotetsu slightly contained excitement was so adorable, Bunny couldn’t stop the smile. “That’s what moving in together usually entails.”
“Are you sure?”
“I wouldn’t be telling you otherwise.”
“I mean,” Kotetsu rubbed the arms for a moment as if debating whether to continue or not. “The last times I brought it up you were… I didn’t think you wanted to.”
Bunny swallowed down his nerves. The least he could do was try to explain himself to the man who had been nothing but patient with him. “This… thing we have,” he started and waved a hand between them, “most of the times, I don’t even know what to do about it. I’ve never had this before, I’ve never felt this before. And just when I think I finally got the hang of things, something happens and I realize I really don’t have the hang of anything at all.”
He stepped out of Kotetsu’s embrace as if needing the distance to say the words. “You know everything about me. You are the only one who knows all there is to know, the only one I trust to know. And you are the only one who really understands why I didn’t want anybody else in my life. You understand the pain that comes with loss.”
“Bunny…”
“But I look at you and I wonder, you know? How can he still have such close friends? How can he still have all these people in his life, and not be terrified of losing them? How can he be so brave and strong and cheerful? I’d ask myself that even as I admired you for it. And then when we started… this thing we have now, I was terrified that I wouldn’t be as strong as you are.”
Bunny ran a hand through his hair, trying to clear his thoughts. “I guess I never stopped being afraid because I kept holding back, didn’t I? That’s why you forced me and Kaede to spend time together. That’s why you forced me to do a whole bunch of things. And gave me a drawer.”
Kotetsu stepped closer, feeling the need to touch him, even if it was just a soft caress against a hand. “I never meant to really force you. I just... I just thought that maybe deep down you wanted it too and all you needed was a little push to take the last step.”
Bunny smiled and entwined their fingers and looked at their joined hands. “You push really hard sometimes.”
“You are a very stubborn man.”
Bunny let out a small laugh. “I thought if I kept holding back, just a little bit, I could maybe make it on my own if I had too. This stay at the hospital made me realize that I’m wrong on two accounts. I can’t really reach you if I keep holding back and-“ he stopped to look up, straight into the golden eyes, “-I really don't want to live without you anymore.”
Kotetsu felt his heart give two hard knocks against his ribs. He had known some of this, had felt the subtle distance between them, and had decided that he’d never ask for more if Bunny wasn’t able to give more. Bunny couldn’t possibly understand what that confession meant to him. He took Bunny’s face in his hands and kissed him, in an almost desperate attempt to transmit all his feelings.
“I can’t do without you. I really can’t do without you,” Kotetsu said embracing him. “You are wrong if you think that it doesn’t scare me,” he murmured pressing his cheek against his head, feeling the bandage underneath, as if reinforcing his words, “but I’m just no good without you. I even tried once, didn’t I? And I got kicked out of the house by my own daughter.”
Bunny blinked surprised and moved away to look at Kotetsu. “You… ever since…” he trailed off. Kotetsu shrugged as if it wasn’t important at all and Bunny didn’t know whether to hit him or kiss him. He ended up doing neither and lowered his brow onto Kotetsu’s. Yeah, he didn’t have the hang of this man at all. “I’m still terrified,” he said and Kotetsu moved back and tipped his head up with a finger.
“Me too. So we’ll do like we always have. I’ll be your partner, you’ll be mine, and together we’ll figure it out together.”
“Okay,” Bunny agreed and rested his head on Kotetsu’s shoulder. “I hope we’ll have good luck modes,” he added and made Kotetsu laugh.
It wasn’t going to be easy, Bunny thought as Kotetsu tumbled them onto the bed. But then again, nothing worthwhile having ever was.
