Chapter Text
“Gabe, look!”
Fuck. What now? He blinked his eyes open, pushed back a yawn and sat up straight. At his side, Jack’s torso twisted to look out of the train window.
“Was it worth waking me up?” He turned to look, unable to stop the second yawn.
Jack raised an eyebrow at him, typical bright smile in place. “You tell me.”
“It’s… corn.” Gabriel squinted, trying to catch an image as the train flashed through the fields. Going a couple hundred miles an hour, details were hard to make out. The sky was that scarily deep blue, with no clouds, mountains, or buildings in sight to break it up and make it seem real. Besides the sky, there was corn. Just corn. Fields of the stuff stretched in very direction, and when he turned back to gaze out the opposite window, he saw nothing but the same. Monotony.
Jack elbowed him in the side. “Yeah, and you know what that means?”
“We’re fed another day.”
At least it got a laugh.
“We’re almost there! Just another couple hours.”
“Hours?”
“Hey.” Jack winked. “I told you I lived in the middle of fucking nowhere. I wasn’t kidding.”
Gabriel snorted, not even dignifying him with a response, and slouched to close his eyes again. They’d been on the train for close to eleven hours at that point; cross-country. It was more comfortable than military transport, but then, it was also considerably slower.
He couldn’t help but take a peek after a few minutes, opening one eye and turning his head slightly. Jack’s smile was in pretty stark contrast to the glucose abyss into which he gazed.
Of course, Jack smiled at a lot of things for reasons Gabriel didn’t understand. Like Gabriel himself.
He straightened again after another hour, unable to get back to sleep. At least he isn’t glued to the window anymore.
Jack, who had been fiddling with his phone, glanced up and smiled at him. “Get any rest?”
“No.”
“You can use your hoodie as a pillow, you know.”
“I’m not taking it off.”
“Edgelord.” Jack muttered.
“Want to run that one by me again?”
Despite himself, Gabriel felt the corner of his mouth start to lift.
This was nice. He liked his job —was damn good at it, too— but finally getting some time off for just the two of them was incredible. He hated having to share, and Jack had too many friends in the squad.
Across from them, an elderly man glanced up from his portable gaming device.
“You boys military?”
Gabriel folded his arms, feeling the dull clank as the tags brushed across his chest. “Yeah. What of it?”
“Oh, I’m sorry. I don’t mean to intrude.” The man said. “I’m just curious. My daughter is in the military. What do you two do?”
Jack elbowed Gabriel again, shooting him the usual why do you have to be so rude look.
“It’s fine.” Jack said. “We’re in the ATU; The UN’s Anti-Terrorism Unit. They send us off to handle major attacks, usually in Europe and North America.
The old man nodded. “I presume there aren’t any nearby now?”
“Nah.” Jack grinned, ran a hand through his perfect golden hair. “Just some time off."
"And you're taking it here? It'd better be for a reason as good as mine." The old man fumbled in his pocket, pulled out a photograph and leaned across the aisle to hand it over. “Just coming to finally move in with my wife. It took a lot of work, since… well.”
Jack took it, moved it so Gabriel could see.
A humanoid omnic, one wearing a red-flowered hat and a sundress.
Ah. I can see how that causes issues.
Jack handed the photograph back. The old man relaxed after seeing that they didn’t begin a verbal or physical assault.
“Congratulations!” Jack said, just as the train mentioned something about their stop coming up. Earlier than expected, but Gabriel wasn’t about to complain.
“You boys have a good time, then.” The old man said as they gathered their things.
The train started up again almost the instant they stepped off, and it was out of sight in less than a minute.
“Hey, Jack.”
Jack turned, pack on his back and excitement plain on his face. “Yeah?”
“There’s nothing here.”
And it was true. There was a tired green metal-and-glass structure just big enough for a few people to stand under, a bit of concrete around that, and then… corn.
Oh. And a worn, admirably wide packed-dirt path leading through said hellscape.
“Don’t worry.” Jack said. “We walk a couple miles, get on a bus for another hour or two, then walk another few miles to my parents’ farmhouse.”
“You have to be fucking kidding me. Why didn’t you mention this before?”
Jack shrugged, something devilish flickering in his eyes. “You’d bitch at me like you are now.”
“Careful. There’s nobody around in a hundred miles. Nobody would hear you scream.” Gabriel warned.
Jack began to walk backwards down the dirt path, eyebrow raised and tone mockingly sultry. “Is that a threat, or a promise?”
With a heavy sigh, Gabriel began to trudge after. "You'll find out."
It wasn’t actually that bad, he had to admit. The late summer weather was nice, they had no obligations, and they were alone. The bus was vacant, and as most vehicles were, automated. They didn’t see another soul for the next couple of hours, and it didn’t change when they finally stepped down off the bus to see another dirt road.
“It’s not far now.” Jack promised.
“Thank fuck. Please, you have electricity right? Running water? Plu-“
“Gabe! It’s not the 00’s anymore. I promise there’s every modern amenity. Well. We don’t have good television. My parents don’t care for it.”
“Why would they?” Gabriel said under his breath as they began the last leg of their journey-- for a while.
They were both quiet for some time, Jack with a skip in his step and Gabriel with lead in his.
He’d offered to go to Indiana before LA; spend a week and a half at each, then fuck off to wherever they were sent next. Jack had been excited to show him where he’d grown up, corn and everything. Something about the land being great or whatever.
It was beginning to feel like a shitty teen romance movie.
Or maybe a horror movie. He glanced around at the corn. It was all considerably taller than him, and thick as hell. It made him feel slightly on-edge at all times, especially when he considered they had no real cover. At least he had his pistol ready in its holster.
He continued to trudge, and Jack continued to beam.
“Real excited to see the family then, huh?” Gabriel finally asked.
Jack’s smile faded, the light leaving his eyes just a little. “Um, yeah. I guess.”
This is different. “You guess?”
Gaberiel hadn’t heard Jack talk much about his family. There was the occasional offhand mention, but otherwise nothing. In fact, now that he thought about it, the only time he’d heard Jack mention his father was when some people in the squad had heard about Jack’s real name.
Many months prior
Stationed Military Base: Common Area
He glanced up from his phone as he felt somebody flop next to him, taking up the other half of the couch.
“Hey, Gabriel!”
He nodded back at Jack, not bothering with words. Jack didn’t seem to mind. He never did.
Across from them, a couple of their squadmates just finished a game of chess. A few others had been watching, and now began to chat about the match.
“Oh, hey Jack!” Daniels grinned, sat back in his chair. He’d lost the match, but only by the skin of his teeth.
The winner, Remman, stretched in his seat. “You know what I heard?”
Daniels began to reset the board for new players, as was custom for the loser. “Whassat?”
“I heard that Jack’s real name isn’t Jack. It’s John.”
Beside Gabriel, Jack froze.
“It’s called a nickname, idiot.” Daniels said.
Remman scoffed. “Yeah, but it ain’t even on his tags. The commander introduced him as Jack. You’ve been holding out on us, eh?”
The last question was directed at Jack, who gave an uneasy smile. “Yeah. I go by Jack. Nobody calls me John. Do I look like a fucking John to you?”
Remman rolled his eyes. “I don’t look like a Greg. Doesn’t matter. Parents named me.”
Daniels gave an offhand shrug. “You seem like a Greg to me.”
“Thanks.” Remman said, voice edging into sarcasm. He stood and gave his chair to the next player. “But why so into this secrecy, John?”
Jack’s brow furrowed. “It’s not a secret; I just don’t like it. Don’t call me that.”
“Why? Oh, you’re from fuck-all nowhere, right. Named after your dad or something, John?”
“I said drop it.” Jack snapped.
Daniels shot Gabriel a surprised glance.
He was just as surprised. Jack didn’t really lose his temper– certainly not over something as banal as this.
“Not really surprising.” Remman joked. The man was good at chess, but truly an idiot. “I hear a lot of rubes have daddy–"
Remman squawked as Jack’s fist caught him directly on the nose, sending a spatter of blood across his face and him stumbling. The chess set clattered down hard, sending carefully arranged pieces flying as the table and Remman both tumbled to the ground.
"Call me John one more time." Jack suggested icily. He was gone before anybody could process it.
Everyone, even Gabriel, sat stunned for a moment.
He’d known that John was on the birth certificate, but not much else besides the fact that nobody called him that. Jack getting this worked up about anything wasn’t exactly… common. Over this?
Well. Not that Gabriel was one to talk, when it came to getting worked up over nicknames.
Gabriel stood, left just as the Captain was walking in to yell about the noise and mess.
He found Jack cooling down on the roof, where he always went when he was upset. Or bored. Or had any excuse to head up.
“Hey, Jackie. You good?”
Jack shrugged, refusing to turn and face him. “Yeah. Sorry.”
“I’m not the one you knocked clear to hell. Not that the bitch didn’t deserve it.”
Jack gave a noncommittal hum. “I may have gone overboard. It’s just a name.”
Gabriel reached over and patted Jack on the shoulder. “Names are important. And hey, you're not the only one with a name complex. The last person who called me Gabe got their ass kicked."
“I guess.” Jack sighed. Finally turned. “I dunno. Guy’s always been a prick though. Today was just the day.”
“Kinda jealous you did it first.” Gabriel checked his watch. “Wanna go grab some food from mess in a couple minutes? It’s almost lunch.”
“Sure.”
Present
Fuck. He never had gotten to punch Remman himself.
“Hey, Gabe? You’re zoning out.”
“Oh. Sorry. What’d you say?”
“I said I missed the land.”
Gabe focused back in. Jack was obstinately refusing to look at him, instead gazing into the corn.
“It’s alright, I guess.” He managed after a minute.
Jack shot him a glance. “You haven’t even seen it yet!”
“Is it different?”
Jack sighed. “Near the center of farmsteads. We have an orchard, some fields for livestock, a patch of forested land, a garden, and yeah… more corn.”
“Right. Livestock. You talk about cows a lot.”
Jack’s smile reappeared. “They’re so sweet!”
“I dunno. Don’t they like, try to maul you?”
“More people have tried to maul me than cows. Don’t get between a cow and its calf, and don’t fuck with bulls. You’ll be fine otherwise.”
“You’re a soldier. Your mauling ratios are off.” Gabriel squinted. Was that a fence in the distance? A break in the endless corn supply?
“Who’s the expert here?” Jack complained. “Anyways, we’re almost to the edge of a livestock field.”
“Great. Twelve more miles to your house, then?”
Jack winked. “About one.”
They continued walking.
“Gabe?”
“Yeah?”
Jack took another while before speaking again. “Thanks. For coming out here with me. It’s actually really great when you avoid the people. Its beautiful, and… well. You’ll see. It’s fun.”
“‘Course.” He said, fighting back a smile as Jack leaned in to kiss his cheek.
“I- oh!” Jack cut himself off and began to sprint down the road, getting over the livestock fence in a smooth one-handed leap and continuing.
Gabriel watched with mounting concern, stopping by the fence as Jack approached a small herd of fuzzy brown cows. They didn't look like the black-and-white mottled ones he’d always envisioned. Were those really just cartoons?
A cow broke off from the herd and approached cautiously at first, then sped up. He thought it was about to ram into Jack, but it slowed at the last second and butted him in the chest instead.
What the fuck.
He watched, concern fading into confusion and disbelief as Jack proceeded to hug and subsequently pet the cow. Cow.
Eventually, Jack headed back towards the fence and to Gabriel, the cow trotting behind like some oversized loyal pet.
“Gabe!” Jack gestured. “Come on!”
Gabriel eyed the cow. “I dunno.”
“Oh come on. It’s perfectly safe, I promise.”
After another minute of coaxing, Gabriel hopped the fence. He kept a damn close eye on the cow, though.
“This is Annabelle; my favorite girl! We grew up together.” Jack said, rubbing under the cow’s ear. “She’s the best.”
“How do you even tell them apart? They all look the same.” Gabriel said, keeping his distance.
“You get to know them, and anyways, you saw how she recognized me! They’re really very smart. And sweet. They’re basically big playful dogs. Come pet her! She’ll love you.”
“I’ll pass, thanks.” Gabriel said, edging away as Jack and the Cow approached.
“Come on, Gabe! She’s sweet. I promise.”
“You’re making a lot of promises.” He muttered.
He didn’t struggle, much, as Jack ducked behind him and took gentle hold of his arm, guiding his hand towards the cow.
Annabelle was soft, and Gabriel didn’t jump when she moved her head up to nose at him.
It wasn’t a flinch. It was… an aborted sneeze.
Yeah.
“See?” Jack said into his ear, voice low. “She likes you.”
Gabriel retracted his arm as soon as Jack released him. “Sure. If you say so, cow whisperer. Wait, how old is this fuckin’ cow?”
“Let’s see. She was born when I was about five… probably about seventeen years old. She’s getting up there, but she should have a few years left in her. She was the first cow I ever helped with the birth. Before that I only helped with pigs and such.”
“Wait, what? You were five and helping with…?”
Jack laughed. “Yeah. That’s normal out here, don’t worry.”
“Ugh.” Gabriel made a face.
They began to walk along the fence towards, presumably, the farmhouse. Annabelle walked alongside them, Jack’s hand resting on her back.
As much as Gabriel hated to admit, it kind of did act like a big weird dog.
A couple of minutes later, they approached a tree that had grown somewhat into the fence. Its twenty-foot trunk and twisting branches dwarfed everything in the surrounding landscape, casting a heavy shadow on the grass beneath it.
“Wanna take a break?” Jack asked, staring up into the branches
Gabriel followed his gaze, caught sight of some apples above them.
“Apple tree? Is this the orchard?”
Jack gave him a dirty look, the barest hint of a smile in place. “No. That’s on the other side of the house. This one’s just for shade and snacks.”
“Sure. They’re pretty high up, though.”
Jack rolled his eyes. By the time Gabriel blinked, Jack was fifteen feet up in the tree and plucking an apple from a branch.
So. That’s where Jack had learned his ridiculously good climbing skills. They’d come into handy during missions for certain.
Gabriel caught one apple, then another eight that followed.
“Hungry?” He asked. Jack flopped down, rested his back against the tree and patted the ground beside him expectantly.
Gabriel complied. Jack immediately moved to press their sides together, polishing an apple on his shirt.
“Here.”
Gabriel took it. Bit into it.
It was sweet, and crunchy, and nothing like store-bought. He hated how good it was.
“Thanks.” He realized he should say.
Jack hummed.
Gabriel watched with growing horror and vague amusement as Annabelle somehow maneuvered to lay her massive body down, resting her head on Jack’s lap.
“What the fuck?” Gabriel said.
“I told you. Big dog.” Jack joked. He picked up one of the excess apples, slid a knife from his belt, flicked it open, and carved off a chunk of apple flesh. He handed it to Gabriel.
“Feed it to her.”
“Jack. There’s not a chance in hell my hand is going near that mouth.”
“Geez, she’s not a goddamn carnivore, Gabe.”
He handed the chunk back. “No.”
Jack sighed, gave Annabelle the chunk.
The crunch was surprisingly delicate.
They worked through a couple apples apiece, and during that time, another few cows wandered over. They proceeded to lay nearby for the most part, and another even had the audacity to rest its head on Gabriel’s lap.
“Is this normal?” Gabriel asked. The fucking thing was heavy.
Jack handed him an apple, gestured to the cow. “They remember me, and it’s a breed of cow known for being a bit friendlier. Milk cows. Not meat cows. Just accept it. Now get your knife and be nice.”
“What is it bites me?”
“I’ll kiss it better.” Jack said dryly.
Well. There’s worse ways to die.
He dug out his knife and sliced off a chunk of apple, held it to the cow with the tips of his fingers.
The cow took it, gently, and managed to drip plenty of juice onto his pants.
“I didn’t know cows ate apples. I thought it was just grass and stuff.” He mentioned eventually.
“Really? Guess they didn't teach you cow diets. They love apples. You’ve seen horses and apples, right? Same thing. You just have to cut them up, otherwise it can get lodged in the esophagus. Trust me, shoving your arm down a cow’s throat is not fun.”
He was too scared to ask if Jack was speaking from experience. He already knew the answer.
He and Jack rested there for a long time, just eating apples, feeding the cows, and quietly chatting with each other. Jack eventually fell asleep on his shoulder, and when Gabriel noticed, he realized how sickly idyllic the whole situation was. Sitting under an apple tree in Indiana, animals laying around them and his closest friend breathing softly on his shoulder.
Yeah.
Jack woke up about an hour later, immediately going back to softly stroking the cow’s head. “Sorry, Gabe.” He murmured. His voice was still endearingly sleepy.
“I’ve said it a hundred times, but your skill in falling the fuck asleep is impressive.”
“My lack of insomniac doesn’t make me impressive.”
“Narcoleptic.”
Jack snorted, gently pushed Annabelle’s head off of his lap and stood. Held out a hand to Gabriel.
It took him a bit longer to get the cow off of him, but he managed, took Jack’s hand and stood.
“Now can we finally go?”
“I suppose.”
They continued walking, finishing off the last of the apples as they went. It didn’t take long for a large farmhouse and some other buildings to loom in the distance, a distinct patch of trees nearby. He glanced over, opened his mouth to say something, but realized instead that Jack was a few paces behind. There was an uneasy expression on his face.
“Second thoughts?”
Jack shook his head, sped up to meet him. “No. I just… never thought I’d be back. Willingly.”
“Then why the hell are we here now?”
“Well I never expected to meet you, did I? You make me want to share some of the happier moments of my life with you. Considering all the ones after I left here were already with you for the most part… that just left this.”
Gabriel didn’t really know what to say. He was usually good with words, but trying to be open with somebody was far more difficult than manipulating them.
He settled for a hum, leaning over to affectionately ruffle through and make a mess of Jack’s hair.
While Jack was busy cursing at him and trying to fix it, they came up on the farmhouse. Now that they were closer, he could see that it was three, possibly four stories tall. The ground level was perhaps three or more times the size of the upper levels, which likely only held one or two rooms apiece. While the building was at least eighty years old, it had modern touches that made it obvious it had been worked on and added to a quite a bit. There were a few cars and smaller transportation devices that were also quite old, but obviously well cared-for and saw plenty of use. He could see the edge of a garden poking around the back of the house, what looked vaguely like a chicken coop, and four barns of varying sizes scattered nearby. There was fencing in places, and it seemed as if it were in the process of being replaced. He couldn’t see anybody as they walked through the yard and around to a door on the side, but it was obvious that the place was well loved; both a home and a place of work.
They stopped at the door, where Jack, looking a bit nauseous, took a deep breath and opened it.
It was messy inside, but not unclean, with bits of people’s lives scattered about the kitchen they stepped into. Childrens’ and dogs’ toys, mostly. At the stove, an older woman with mousey hair in an apron worked on the finishing touches of some sort of pie.
All in all, it was a sickeningly saccharine cliche of rural American life. He didn’t know whether to be disgusted or impressed.
It’s homey, but damn. Overwhelmingly so. The place gave him good vibes, he had to admit, though his home life detector was a bit wonky as he'd only had his grandmother growing up.
“You’re back early.” The woman at the stove commented. “Did you figure out what happened with the field anomaly?”
Jack swallowed. “Not quite. Hey, Ma.”
The woman, apparently Jack’s mother, jerked around with a loud gasp and her hand to her mouth.
“Jack! Oh my goodness!” She rushed forward and pulled Jack into a hug. It was almost comical, considering he stood a head over her.
What the fuck. Did he not tell them we were coming?
He stood there, arms folded, watching with a mounting feeling of awkward as she gushed over her son.
“Oh, it’s so good to see you, baby! You’ve grown!”
“Ma.” Jack sounded embarrassed.
“And look at that! You look like you could lift the barn!”
“Ma!”
“And you look so grown up!”
“Ma, I am an adult! Geez.” Jack managed to pull away, gesture over to Gabriel.
Jack’s mother seemed to notice him for the first time. “Oh! I’m so sorry. Hello. I’m Amy. You must be… Gabriel? Jack mentioned he was bringing somebody!”
At least they knew we were coming.
He stuck out a hand. “Yeah. Gabriel. Nice to meet you.”
She blinked, shook his hand. “Oh my. You must be so warm in that! A black hooded jacket in late summer?” She turned to Jack with folded arms. “Get him into something better suited for the weather, honey! He’s a guest! Your room is still where you left it. Go ahead and put your things away and come have some pie, okay?” She pulled him down and kissed him on the cheek. “It’s so good to see you!”
“Good to see you too, Ma. Come on, Gabe.”
Jack bolted, leaving Gabriel to follow in his wake.
They wove their way through parts of the house, eventually heading up two flights of stairs and down a short hall to the end, where Jack opened a door to reveal another set of stairs.
“Jack?”
“Yeah?”
“This the attic?”
“Best room in the house. May be biased though, considering it has all my stuff.” Jack must’ve caught sight of his expression, because he rolled his beautiful blue eyes and grinned. “It’s not like that. It’s a finished attic. Has the best view of the house. My sister was always jealous.”
“Your…”
Jack turned, glanced around, then pointed to a picture frame on the wall.
An idyllic family. Jack’s mother; Amy, about fifteen years younger. With her was a dark-haired, smiling man about her age; likely Jack’s father, a boy of about fourteen; spitting image of his dad, a light-haired girl of maybe ten, and another boy of about six. The youngest was obviously Jack, with those blue eyes and the messy blonde hair. He was missing a tooth, displayed front-and-center with a huge grin.
“Yup. Ma, Dad, Kenneth, Cora, and me. Ma and dad sleep on the second floor, Kenneth and Cora used to sleep on the third, and I had the attic.”
The photo was throwing Gabriel a bit off. It was a lot of information input at once. “You mentioned you had a brother once, but I had no idea you had a sister. You never talk about your family, you know that?”
Jack shrugged. “How often do you talk about yours?”
Fair point.
“Anyways.” Jack continued. “She pulled the same thing I did. At seventeen, she tested into a full ride to a college in New York. I think she visits on occasion, but as far as I know lives somewhere on the east coast. Works for some military tech company doing physics nonsense.”
“So your brother is the only one who stayed to work the… farm? Is that how you say it?”
Jack laughed, grabbed his hand and began to pull him up the stairs. “Yeah, that’s how they say it. Though, when I was telling Ma we were visiting, she mentioned he’d gotten married a few years ago. He probably doesn’t live here anymore.”
“I’m surprised you told her, considering her reaction when she saw you.” He said, having to duck under a particularly low bit of ceiling.
“I told her a few weeks ago that I may come visit at some point, and if I did, was bringing a guy named Gabriel along– but I didn’t… you know. Specify. I dunno how we want to handle that.”
And then they were in Jack’s childhood room. It was bigger than he’d expected, and the ceiling was high enough with the exception of above the long twin bed.
He rested his hands on his hips, turned in a full circle while Jack glared at him.
“Go ahead. Laugh. I’ll be in your room in a couple of weeks.”
“Yeah, but I wasn’t a fucking nerd.” Gabriel joked, pointing to an old avengers poster.
God, that has to be from the 10’s.
“Comic books are cool! Well. When you’re a teenager. And hey, I only used the internet for school. Not a lot of entertainment out here. I was stuck mostly reading comics and going outside to hang out.”
Fuck, Gabriel couldn’t even imagine that hell. Even being stone-cold broke, there were a thousand things to do in LA at any given hour, day or night. He and his buddies would trawl the city until the early hours of the morning, breaking into warehouses and scuffling at the beach and sneaking into movies and so much else, all in a single night, and no two were the same.
Until he’d left to join the military.
Posters covered the rough wooden walls, mostly comprised of comic book characters with the exception of one by the bed; A huge, beautiful map of constellations that nearly covered that wall.
Made sense. The first time they went on what he considered a real date, they’d ended up hiking into the mountains near the base. They’d laid down on a hill and talked for hours, Jack occasionally pointing out constellations and certain stars. As a city kid, Gabriel had never really seen the night sky like that. Even after he’d joined the military, he’d never thought to look up before he’d met Jack.
There was a bed built into the slope of one wall, next to a window that was large enough and nearly close enough to roll out of while asleep were it open. Besides that, there was a desk, a dresser, and a side table. Two doors; one slightly opened to reveal part of a sink, and the other closed. Likely a closet.
Wait.
The bedsheets were gray and very adult, but sticking out-
He grabbed the edge before Jack could stop him and pulled it into the light.
A full-sized, round Captain America Shield pillow.
He held it up, grinning at Jack’s mortified face.
“It’s soft.” Jack protested weakly.
“You’re-“
Cute
“Such a nerd.”
“I’m the farthest thing from a nerd! I grew up on a farm and now I fuck up terrorists for a living! It’s not 2011, Gabriel, comics aren’t nerdy!”
He threw the pillow at Jack.
“I know. I just think it’s funny when your face gets all red like that.”
Jack made a disgusted noise, threw the pillow back to the bed and followed it with his backpack.
Gabriel did the same.
“Gabe, get that hoodie off. You’re going to get me killed.”
“No.”
“Aw, please?”
“No.”
Jack shot him that devilish look again. “I have some more summer appropriate clothes you could borrow.”
Gabriel raised an eyebrow.
“You’re very handsome, you know. I might make it up to you if I can actually see your arms for once.”
“...Fine.”
He threw on some of Jack’s “summer” clothes, consisting of a sleeveless tee and some shorts. He didn’t like being without his hood, but the way Jack looked at him was enough to allay that suddenly minor annoyance.
“C’mon. Ma’s waiting.”
As they went back downstairs, he figured it would be the best time to ask.
“So, uh, what are we going to tell your parents? Why are you so hesitant? Are they… not…?”
Jack sighed. “No, that’s not really the issue. They know I’m, um, I mean, you’re not the first guy I’ve been with.”
“...I’m not?”
Jack shrugged. “I thought you knew. I’m pretty sure I mentioned it sometime during my first few weeks in the squad. You probably weren’t paying much attention, considering we weren’t even friends at the time.”
“Well. Alright. So… what do we tell them?”
“They’re not dumb. I wouldn’t bring just a friend all the way to Indiana. I say we just do what we’ve kinda been doing. Not really say yes or no, but just say that it would be against regulations. Heavily imply, perhaps, but not say outright. Sound good?”
“Sure. It’s worked so far.”
“Great. Also–” Jack cut himself off, running his hand through his hair. It was a stressed running. Gabriel knew the difference.
“What?”
“Nothing. Ready for some pie?” Jack sped off before Gabriel could inquire further.
He’s acting so weird. I don’t like it.
In the kitchen, Jack’s mother was busy setting up a couple plates.
“Do you like apple pie, Gabriel? How about ice cream? Vanilla? It’s homemade.” She enthused, prodding at them to sit down at the table.
“Yeah. Er, yes please.”
“What do I call her?” He hissed at Jack. “Ma’am? Mrs. Morrison? Amy?”
Jack shrugged, seeming to be enjoying Gabriel’s struggle. “Any. She’s not picky.”
She set down two massive portions in front of them, took a seat across the table. “You never specified when you’d be nearby! You should really call, honey. You almost gave me a heart attack.”
Jack scratched the back of his head. “Sorry Ma. Just wanted to surprise you.”
She shook her head, smile in place. “Well-”
A voice came from behind them; older, male.
“John. You’re home.”
Gabriel noted how quickly the joy dropped from Jack’s face, and after flickering through fear and apprehension, settled on something more neutral.
Jack turned. “Hey, dad. Yeah.”
The voice belonged to the man in the photograph, a decade and a half tacked onto his tired features. Despite his age, he was in amazing condition. Probably had to do with all the farming or whatever.
“It’s good to see you. Now, who’s this?” Jack’s father asked, eyes flicking to him.
“This is Gabriel. We always partnered up in the ATU.”
“ATU?” John squinted.
“Oh, right. After I went through basic and a couple other things, I was selected for the Anti-Terrorism Unit. S-Squad.”
They didn’t know that? One of the first things Gabriel had done was call his grandmother.
“I see. Well, it’s nice to meet you.” Jack’s father gave him a surprisingly warm smile, shook his hand. “Any friend of John’s is welcome here.”
“Thank you.” Gabriel said. “It’s a nice place you have here. Very, uh, open.”
“Gabe’s a city kid.” Jack said. “He saw his first cow about an hour ago.”
“Shut it, Jackie.” He teased.
John and Amy exchanged glances.
“Want some pie, Honey?” Amy asked John.
“Yes ma’am.” John sat at the table with them, and as he did, a child of about three zoomed in through the door, laughing and screaming.
“Argghh! Get back here! I’m gonna get you!” A grown man sprinted through after the child, skidding to a shocked halt when he saw them.
“Uh. Hey, Jack.” The man said weakly.
Kenneth. I guess we know why there are so many kids’ toys scattered about.
“Hey.” Jack said.
“You’re, uh, looking… not shot.”
“Thanks. You too.”
Kenneth vaguely gestured towards Gabriel. “This…?”
“Gabriel.” Jack informed. “Buddy of mine from my unit.”
“Buddy.” Kenneth repeated.
“Yep.” Gabriel said. “You must be the older brother. Nice to meet you.”
“Likewise. You-“
“Daddy!” The three year old girl launched herself back into the room to tug at Kenneth’s hand, but halted with an open mouth when she saw them.
“Rebecca, this is Uncle Jack. I told you about him, remember? He joined the military.”
She stared at Jack, then back up at Kenneth, then at Gabriel. She pointed at Jack, then Gabriel.
Kenneth sighed. “The one on the left. Do you remember your left?”
Christ, the kid’s an idiot.
The little girl squinted, then toddled over to Jack with wide eyes. She made a gun with her hand. “Pew?”
Jack sighed, eerily enough in exactly the same way his brother just had. “Pew.”
She grinned, hugged his leg, then caught sight of a toy on the ground and wandered off with it.
“Kids.” Kenneth said. He seemed a bit unsure of himself.
“Heard you married. Tamara?” Jack asked.
“Yeah. She’s at home with the baby. We, uh, built another house near the orchard.”
“Congratulations.”
“Thanks. Well, I’ll see you at dinner I suppose. I should go make sure she doesn’t burn the place down. Nice to see you, and nice meeting you, Gabriel.”
Kenneth cursed under his breath as a crash came from the living room, and sped up.
It was all so normal; out of some hallmark movie or something.
“So, should we set up Ken’s old room for your friend, John?” Jack’s father suggested.
Oh boy.
Jack shrugged. “Nah, we’ll make do.”
A silence stretched on.
“Your bed is pretty small.” Amy said eventually.
Jack shrugged again, the tips of his ears reddening. “We slept in way worse places during some missions. It’ll be fine.”
“Well, what do you think, Gabriel?” Amy asked. “You’re the guest.”
“It’s fine with me. No need to go to any trouble on my account.” He said.
“It’s really no trouble. But, uh, I suppose… if you two… oh, Jack? Could you do me a favor?”
Jack perked up, obviously relieved at the change in subject. “Sure. What’s up?”
“One of the calves is sick. Your brother can’t figure out what’s wrong with her, and you always did have quite the knack for anything animal related. Would you mind taking a look?” Amy said.
“Of course. Barn?”
“Yes.” Jack’s father said. “She’s with the mother, still. Let us know if you need help separating them.”
“Nah, I’ll get Gabe to help me.” Jack said, collecting everybody’s dishes to deposit into the sink.
I will?
Fuck. Not more cows. Hadn’t Jack specifically told him not to get between a mother cow and the baby? Calf? Whatever.
Later that night, they all sat around the massive dining table in a room adjacent to the kitchen.
He, Jack, Jack’s mother and father, his brother, his brother’s wife, the little girl, and a baby in a high chair. The meal was the most awkward for he and the brother, apparently. Everyone else spoke freely.
“So, Gabriel.” Amy asked eventually, probably taking pity on he and his silence. “Where are you from? Jack mentioned something about a city.”
Gabriel hesitated. “Uh, LA. Los Angeles. California.”
“Oh! That must be so nice. I hear the beaches are lovely.”
“‘s nice. Lot of tourists in the summer though.” He said.
“I imagine. I’ve seen pictures, and it seems quite beautiful.”
As long as you stay out of the inner city, sure.
“So, how did you and John meet?” Jack’s father asked. “He said you’re in the same unit. Are they not large?”
Jack shot him an apologetic look. Gabriel shrugged. “Yeah. He joined the S unit, which is the smallest AT unit. Maybe twenty of us. You know. ‘Cause it’s the most elite.”
“Oh, really?” Kenneth said. “That’s pretty cool. So you’re really good at that… military stuff, then?”
Jack shot his brother a puzzled glance. “I guess, yeah.”
Gabriel snorted. “Yeah. Jack’s actually pretty amazing. Second best in the squad, after me of course. Considering we’re in the S unit of one of the more intense lines of military work… I’d consider that really good at military stuff.”
Jack rolled his eyes. “You wish I was the second best. I could totally take you.” He joked.
“One-v-one me, behind the dumpster after school.”
Jack laughed.
“I didn’t realize you were really into it that much.” Kenneth said, wrestling a butter knife out of his daughter’s hand.
“I’m sure he’s not that impressive.” Jack’s father dismissed. “What sort of things do you do in the ATU? Did you just stop attacks, or as well actively hunt them down?"
It took Gabriel a moment to realize what Jack’s father had just said. It threw him off guard, just a little.
...what?
He glanced over to Jack, who was staring down and poking at his pork with a blank expression
He’s not even trying to defend himself. And what the hell does this asshole know? He’s probably never even seen a hint of combat.
“...no. Like I said, Jack’s pretty amazing. Impressive falls under that umbrella. You-“
He glanced over as Jack elbowed him in the side, mouthing drop it.
John Morrison shot him a curious look, then shrugged. “I don’t mean to insult you, Gabriel. I have no doubt that you’re quite the soldier. I’m sure people just slip through the cracks and get into the impressive squads, or whatnot. Though-“
A cell phone rang. Kenneth answered.
“Yeah? Oh, damn. Er, I mean, darn.”
“Daddy said a bad word.” The toddler whispered to her mother.
Kenneth hung up. “Sorry Ma, I gotta run. The Lewis family’s water line broke. I need to return some tools I borrowed.”
Jack’s father finished off his cob and stood. “I’ll come with you. Our water line had some issues earlier in the year, so maybe I can help.”
The two departed, and soon after, Jack excused the both of them as well.
Once back in Jack’s room, he turned and grabbed Jack by the lapels. “What, you’re just going to sit there and let him talk about you like that?”
Jack jerked away. “Shut the fuck up! I know when to pick my battles, okay?” He snapped. “It’s not worth it.”
“I dunno, it seems pretty fucking worth it to me. Your own father is-”
“You think I don’t know? I lived here for nearly eighteen years!”
Gabriel went to snap back, but instead took a deep breath. Jack was obviously getting worked up. Yelling at him wouldn’t help.
“Jack, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to…”
“It’s fine.” Jack took a step back, seeming a bit embarrassed. “I… Yeah.”
“Has it really always been like this?”
Jack shifted uneasily, his gaze wandering. “It doesn’t matter, Gabe. I’m sorry. I really hoped we could avoid this.”
He stepped forward, took Jack’s hand and pressed a kiss to the back. “It does matter. Jack, why didn’t you ever tell me?”
Jack tried to pull away, but Gabriel kept a tight hold on his hand. “It’s really not a big deal. My dad and I don’t get along. That’s it.”
“Sure looked like more than that. He was all friendly; seemed glad to see you. What the hell is his problem?”
“He’s not the one with the problem. I am. Listen, it really doesn’t matter. Let’s just go out and do something.”
“Not a chance. I’m worried about you.”
Jack tried to pull away again, and failed.
“Gabe, c’mon. I really don’t want to bother you with all this. Okay?”
“Bad excuse. Not a bother. Not okay. What the fuck do you mean by saying you’re the problem?”
Jack very nearly slipped away, so instead, Gabriel pushed him and tumbled both of them onto the bed. Pinned him down.
“Talk to me, Jackie.”
“Can’t you just leave it alone?”
Gabriel gave him an unimpressed stare.
“No.”
Jack sighed. “Okay. Here. My dad is a pinnacle of the community. He’s a great guy; he’ll help anybody who asks. The entire town loves him. He’s a great husband, and a great father. My brother and sister adored him. I’ve never heard him say a bad word about anybody ever. Except, well, me. I don’t know what I did. I don’t have a single memory of him, not even in my early childhood, ever telling me I’ve been anything halfway better than adequate. If my brother accomplished something, he got a smile and ruffled hair and, ‘that was tough. Good job!’. I would be lucky if he even acknowledged I did anything. Of course, if I fucked up, he would be all over that. Hell, even him telling me it’s ‘good to see you’ today was so weird.” Jack sounded miserable. “It’s just me, I guess.”
Gabriel was flabbergasted. “And your mother never said anything?”
Jack shrugged. “No. She’s a great Ma, don’t get me wrong, but… no. She was really the only one who was nice to me, though. Well. Except my sister, but she was always studying in her room, so we didn’t talk much.”
“Jack. Eighteen years?”
“It’s not that bad. My dad was a bit of a dick. That’s it.”
“Did it ever get physical?”
Jack hesitated, and in that moment, he had to restrain himself from tracking down Mr. John Morrison and handing his ass to him.
“Only rarely. He was more of an emotional abuse kind of guy.”
The joke fell flat.
“And what about your brother?”
“...He’s mellowed out.”
“From?”
Jack shrugged. “Being a dick. There’s not a lot of entertainment around here. He and his buddies… well.” He pulled up his shirt, revealing the scar on his lower chest Gabriel had seen a thousand times. A puncture wound. “My brother’s friend, Finn, was the worst, but they were all horrible. All of them years older than me.”
Gabriel brushed his fingers across the scar. He’d seen it before, but he’d always assumed it had been from Jack’s military time, before he’d joined the ATU. In retrospect, it was far too old for that.
“What…?” He started.
“I was, I dunno, nine or so. They had to have been around fifteen. I had finished up my chores, was about to head to my treehouse when they wandered nearby and saw me. They seemed bored. By that time, I knew what that meant. I tried to run, but they cornered me in the south barn. His buddies pinned me down, he grabbed a pitchfork. They taunted me for a while while he poked at me. Eventually, his hand slipped. Stabbed me pretty bad. Dad had to drive me to the medical center in town, all while yelling at me that I should’ve been more of a man and fought back or something. That’s just one time.” Jack gave a humorless laugh. “You’ve asked me before how I’m so damn good at the base courses and climbing. Yeah. I had a lot of practice.”
Gabriel didn’t know what to say. “Jack.”
“I know, I know. You don’t have to say anything. I’m just sorry it came to this.”
“No, that’s not- I just don’t know why you didn’t tell me about any of this. I mean…”
“I told you. I didn’t want to- I don’t want you to think I’m-“ Jack jerked up, opened the window. “Fuck this, let’s go to the roof.”
“What?”
Jack shot him a grin. Gabriel could tell he was trying for his usual devilish look, but all he saw was a mask. Guilt.
“The roof, Gabe. I did it all the time when I was a kid. Great place to stargaze and hang out.”
Gabriel shrugged, finally acquiesced in letting Jack up and clambered out onto the roof with him.
It was initially a steep climb up, but the years of house additions left plenty of strangely shaped roof patches for them to relax in. They kicked up their feet on some sloped paneling and watched the first few stars come out.
“You’re gonna love the sky here, Gabe.” Jack said. “It’s even better than those mountains out by the old base. There was still a ton of light pollution there.”
Gabriel hummed, wrapped an arm around Jack’s shoulders as usual.
Unlike usual, Jack stiffened, even made as if to flinch away. He seemed to catch himself however, and snuggled in as usual.
He sighed. “You aren’t okay, Jack. Is there something else you want to tell me?”
“No.”
Gabriel knew he shouldn’t push, but then again, he wasn’t a nice person. Or a patient person. He’d already been far more delicate with Jack than he’d be for anyone else on the goddamn planet.
“Jackie. It’s okay, you know. I’m not going to think any less of you.”
Jack didn’t say anything, but Gabriel heard his breath hitch. Not in the usual good way.
“Why can’t you just leave it alone?” Jack said miserably. “I just wanted to show you around. Maybe pick some blackberries. Introduce you to Annabelle. Show you the night sky. The good stuff. We don’t need to get into the bad. I’m fine.”
“You’re not fine, Jack. You forget that I actually know you. I guess you aren’t used to that, but guess what? I care about you.”
He leaned in to kiss Jack’s forehead, but Jack flinched away and sat up out of Gabriel’s arm before he could.
“You can’t promise you won’t think any less of me. You don’t know what I’d say.” Jack whispered, wrapping his arms around his knees and gazing into the paneling.
Gabriel sat up, but didn’t try to touch him. “I already promised, and I stand by my words.”
“You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me, Gabe, and I’ve been a selfish idiot.”
“I somehow doubt that. You know, we can leave at any time. There’s nothing they can do.”
Jack took a deep breath. “Yeah. But fuck them. I’m going to show you everything I want to show you.”
Gabriel reached out, rubbed Jack’s cheek with his thumb.
“Jackie. It’s okay.”
“I don’t know whether to love you or hate you. You’re so good at manipulating people. Especially me.”
Gabriel laughed under his breath. “As if you don’t do the same to me. Listen, Jack. I love you. I’ve dated a few people before, but you’re the only person I’ve ever said that to. Give me some credit.”
Jack didn’t smile, or even look at him. “I- I know. I’m sorry. I should’ve told you a long time ago. You deserve to know, considering we’re… but, like I said, I’m selfish.”
Gabriel wasn’t sure as to what they were talking about anymore. About Jack’s dad? His brother? Something else?
After a long minute of silence, Jack sighed. It was too dark for Gabriel to see his face anymore.
“I told you about my Brother’s friend. Finnley. Finn.”
“Yeah.”
“Most of my brother’s friends didn’t bother me unless they were all in a group and just looking for something to do. He was different. About… six or seven years older than me, I guess. He’d pick on me whenever he saw me, even if nobody else was around. When I was ten… things got worse. He-“ Jack swallowed. “I… really don’t know how to talk about this, Gabe. I’ve only ever told one other person.”
“I guess tell me like you told them.”
Who in the world did he tell? He couldn’t imagine him telling his mother, or god forbid his father.
“There would be liberal tears if I did that.” Jack snorted halfheartedly.
Instead of replying, Gabriel rubbed his shoulder, rested his hand there in a way he hoped was comforting.
“He started to, I dunno. Get sexual.”
Oh. Gabriel realized. Yeah. That makes sense. When we first got together, he was so hesitant. I thought it was because I was the first guy he was with, but I guess… He felt a bit guilty, now.
“Jackie.”
Jack continued, as if he was just trying to spit it all out at once and never deal with it again.
“Started when I was ten. When I was about fifteen, I punched him so hard I knocked a tooth out. He never touched me again. It was hell during those years, though. I always had to be careful. I could be digging up dead corn plants in the middle of the field and a hand would just appear on my shoulder. I could try to run or fight, Sure, but hell. I was a kid. He was so much bigger than me, and usually faster. He’d just pin me down and do whatever he wanted, always talking about my hair or my eyes or saying what a cute kid I was. The worst part is that my brother knew. He didn’t care. In fact, sometimes he’d set me up. ‘Hey Jack, go down to the east barn. You left your sweater.’. And I’d get there and Finn would be there and then it’d be too late. I guess I was just lucky that he never did any real damage, because it wasn’t like I could tell anyone. Dad would just yell at me for not being enough of a man or whatever and blame me. Ma would tell dad. My brother already knew. He was apart of the problem. My sister? Well… I didn’t want to bother her, and it’s not like she could’ve done anything anyways. Even if I could make it to the doc’s by myself, I was very much a minor. He’d call my dad. Between my family and Finn and everything, I probably would’ve tried to kill myself if I hadn’t had Ethan.”
“...Ethan?”
“My best friend since we were toddlers. He’s the only one who knew and believed me about all that nonsense. We did pretty much everything together. He’s, uh, also the guy I dated for a couple years, but I broke it off eventually when I decided to leave for the military. About a year before I actually left. He’s a real genius, loves astronomy and stuff, but has no ambition at all. He could probably be a talented astronomer or something, but he’s content to just… farm. I dunno. I owe him my life for just being there for me, but, I wish he’d do better for himself.”
“Y-“
Jack barreled on. “I’m just sorry, Gabe. I should’ve told you a long time ago. I just-” his breath hitched again, and Gabriel realized he was in near-tears. “You’re just so fucking perfect. You’re confident and stupidly handsome and an amazing leader and soldier and I’m just a mess. I’m absolutely pathetic and I can’t even- even-“
And then Jack broke down into sobs, not even fighting when Gabriel gathered him into his arms and held him.
It was a world away from the confident, cocky, grinning soldier Gabriel had fallen for out in the field, but he’d never loved Jack more than now.
A good ten or so minutes later, Jack finally calmed down enough to breathe normally.
“I’m-“ Jack began.
“Don’t you dare apologize.” Gabriel warned. “It’s okay, Jack. It’s okay. I’m the one who’s sorry. I had no idea. But listen. You’re not pathetic, you’re not a mess, and you’re not ruined or tainted or anything if that’s what you’re trying to say. If anything, I think you’re amazing. You came out of a fucking horrible childhood and managed to be the best man I know by a mile. I love you, okay? It’s going to be fine. Thank you for trusting me.”
It was funny, Gabriel reflected later that night in Jack’s bed.
He’d been thrust onto his grandmother as an infant by druggie parents who he’d never seen again, grown up in inner-city near-poverty. Yet, his childhood had been happy. His grandma was a great woman. He’d gotten into his fair share of trouble, sure, but it had been a great childhood.
Jack had been born into a great family on paper. Two happy parents, siblings, relatively wealthy, near a peaceful town, on thousands of acres of farmland- and yet, his childhood had been absolute hell.
And they’d both ended up in the same place.
Just went to show, he supposed.
He woke up to a cold bed that morning. Jack didn’t seem to be around, so he stretched, threw on some more of Jack’s ‘summer-appropriate’ clothes, and went downstairs.
“Oh, Gabriel! Good morning!” Amy beamed at him, back in her apron and working on a couple packed lunches.
“Morning.” He said. After last night, seeing any of Jack’s family left a bad taste in his mouth. The mother was by far not the worst, but really, those who were silent in child abuse were just as complicit.
“Care for some breakfast? Jack is out feeding the chickens right now, I think.”
“Sure.”
After he mowed down far too many pancakes and eggs, he went out to try to find Jack. The morning was bright and cheerful, and somehow peaceful despite the general air of business. A strange feeling, considering there was again nobody in sight.
He wandered around the chicken coop, then looked around back to one of the barns. He paused when he heard a voice.
“-Just wanted to say it.” Kenneth’s voice finished from inside the barn.
Gabriel moved back into the shadow as Jack replied.
“Great. What do you want me to say? All’s forgiven?”
Should be be eavesdropping? No. Was he about to?
Duh.
“No.” Kenneth said reluctantly. “I still figured I should apologize. It’s not going to make your childhood any retroactively better, but… I do regret it. Ever since I had kids, I realized I was probably the worst sibling of all time.”
“That award is definitely within your reach.” Jack said dryly.
“I know. I don’t expect you to forgive and forget or anything, but just remember. My kids had nothing to do with it.”
“Wait, what? Excuse me?” Jack sounded incredulous. “Are you insinuating that I would take it out on your kids?”
“Well-“
“Well guess what? I’m not a fucking monster that would stoop to hurt a child. That’s you. That’s dad. Fuck you, Kenneth. You can shove your fucking apology.”
Gabriel skirted the side of the building, made as if he’d been walking towards it.
Jack stormed out of the barn, darkened face breaking into a smile the instant he saw Gabriel.
“Gabe! Hey, you’re awake!”
“Hey Jack. Your mom said you were feeding chickens or whatever.”
“Yeah, I went for the pigs after. Get enough sleep?”
“Maybe.”
Jack chuckled. “We can get you in a nap later.” He hesitated. “Gabe. About last night-“
Gabriel held up a hand. “It’s okay. You don’t need to say anything.”
Jack relaxed. Gave him a small smile. “Ma said she’s making a cobbler. Asked us to go pick some blackberries. You down?”
“That sounds sickeningly rural. Let’s do it.”
They took four-wheelers down a couple miles to some berry patches near the woods, and spent a few hours messing around and throwing berries at each other. They were blackberries, but even the bitter edge was considerably less than store-bought.
With the sun and the light wind and the beautiful scenery-- and Jack, it was an amazing day. Jack even seemed to have forgotten about the tense issues of last night, now laughing and poking fun at Gabriel and smiling in that way he did that Gabriel loved so much.
He could see why Jack wanted to come back, despite the people.
“Hey, Gabe!” Jack suddenly hissed, crouching down. “Look!”
Gabriel glanced near the woods where Jack was pointing. A fox paced near the edge of the trees, sniffing around a patch of mushrooms.
Holy shit. A real fox!
Oh no.
“We don’t have to kill it, do we?” He hissed back.
Jack sent him a startled glance. “What?”
“...no? It’s not a threat to the chickens? I have no idea how this works!”
Jack shook his head, smile back in place. “Nah, unless it proves itself a threat. I just thought you’d like to see it.
I did.
“It looks soft.” He confessed.
“They are. We have some pelts laying about if you want one.” Jack said, standing back up.
“Not a chance.” Gabriel said.
“Coward.”
They spent that night on the roof again, looking at the stars and enjoying the cool night air. Despite everything, it was truly quite beautiful.
The next day they went out to the corn fields, as Jack’s father had asked them to investigate a broken fence about a mile down the road. They weren’t in a rush, so they decided to take their time and walk.