Chapter Text
Lyanna felt like being sick. She’d never felt such sorrow, rage, and fear all at the same time. Sorrow that her boy, the only piece of Rhaegar left in this world- aside from the young woman next to her, holding her hand and looking like she was battling the same emotions as herself- was at the Wall, about to vow his life away. She didn’t understand. She knew that she and Ned had issues, she knew that her boy was not treated as he should be, that he was treated as no child should be, but she’d still thought he loved Jon. Yet it appeared he loved his whoremongering stag friend more than his own family. The Honourable Ned Stark had tricked them all. It was quite the shock.
“Is Arthur certain? What will be done?” she couldn’t bear to think of her boy at the wall, alone with rapists and thieves.
Oswell responded quickly, “He’s certain, I’m certain, that’s what everyone around Winterfell was saying. Ned Stark is readying to welcome Robert and resigned to becoming his Hand, preparing to leave for King’s Landing, likely taking his younger children with him. I wouldn’t be surprised if he betroths Sansa to that golden shit of a prince, no doubt Baratheon still dreams of tying your houses in marriage. The a week after the raven arrived, Jaehaerys left for the Wall.”
She knew she never should have let her brother take her son. But what was she to do? She was half dead after the birth and Ned had sworn he’d take good care of him and raise him in Winterfell as she had been. In exchange he would allow her, Rhaenys, Oswell and Arthur to live in Greywater Watch. Rhaella, Viserys, Daenerys and Gerold Hightower had had to flee to Essos. Ned said they couldn’t hide them, even in the swamps of the Neck. Not with their bright silver hair. Not when Robert knew that those Targaryens yet lived. It was pure luck and good planning by Rhaella and Varys that they’d been able to clear out the treasury. With that money, they’d be safe. At least that was their hope. Lyanna never would’ve allowed him to take Jae but Ned had agreed to allow Arthur to come with Jae to Winterfell, under the guise of being ‘Jon Snow’s’ uncle. It was obvious why Ned wanted her son. He wasn’t worried about Jae’s well-being, he was worried about Robert Baratheon and wanted to ensure Jaehaerys wouldn’t take back his rightful throne. That he wouldn’t be raised to take it back. Arthur had told her how her son was treated, how he was denied the lessons Ned’s trueborn son received. She’d been told how the fish and her septa denigrated him. She couldn’t believe Ned had allowed it, but when Lyanna and Arthur had complained he’d said, “It’s necessary. It wouldn’t look right if my lady wife doted on my bastard.” Which was all well and true, but she didn’t need to dote on him. She just needed to leave him alone, not belittle him, nor try to turn his cousins against their supposed bastard brother. Ned could’ve put an end to it, he was the lord, with how that fish was raised she would obey. At least he hadn’t told her the truth about ‘Jon Snow’. Catelyn would cut off her boy’s head herself and send it to Robert.
Everything had gone wrong, right when it seemed to be finally going just right. The children had received direwolves and Lyanna had taken it as a sign from the gods. Then it’d all gone to shit. Jon Arryn died and the Whoremonger King was coming with his poisonous golden queen, and Ned had thought it best if Arthur wasn’t there to antagonize him. Ned had sent him back to Greywater for the duration of the Baratheon visit, Arthur couldn’t have known that was just an excusea to get Jae to the Wall without Arthur’s interference.. By the time Arthur had turned back to Winterfell -for reasons Lyanna didn’t know and was wholly grateful for- a few days after he’d departed, Ned’s “brother” was about to arrive and her son was gone.
Arthur had immediately sent Oswell back to inform them and set off after Jaehaerys. She just hoped he’d be in time. That he’d stop him before he could swear himself to the Watch. There were only two ways out of the oath: death and soulmark, and there hadn’t been an instance of soulmarks since the Conciliator and the Good Queen. Her baby brother had wanted to go to the Wall as well, when Ned had returned to Winterfell with his ‘bastard’ and her bones. Arthur had saved him from that fate, told him the truth and Benjen had gone to White Harbor to squire for a Manderly. He was now a man grown, with a wife and child and another on the way. Lyanna had convinced Ned to ask three boons from Robert, he deserved them, after all, for his service in the War of the Usurper. So Ned had asked for and been granted a pardon for Arthur, allowing him to accompany Jae to Winterfell, she had wanted a five year pause on taxes from the North but with the state the treasury was in, that wasn't possible. Instead Ned had gotten the approval to rebuild Moat Cailin with 15% of the North's crown taxes for a period of ten years. The final boon was the right to build thirty ships for a new Northern Fleet, ostensibly due to fear of the Ironborn getting bolder. Though, Lyanna supposed that wasn’t actually a cover for Ned, he really only wanted those things to defend against the Ironborn, not to prepare the North for war in case Jae was found out and needed to be protected. She hoped she was being unfair and was wrong about all of it, but she was running low on hope.
Lyanna looked out the window of the sitting room, to the Weirdwood beyond. She turned away, quickly, it seemed her gods had abandoned her. She’d go to pray later, beg them to protect her family, her son. Right now she needed to be with those she loves and who loved her in turn. Jyanna had just pressed a mug of tea into her hand and Lyanna had barely noticed. She looked up in time to see Howland walk over to squeeze her shoulder in comfort. He only wanted what was best for Jae too. Everyone in this room did. Ashara sat on the couch, Alaric’s head in her lap, stroking his dark brown hair. He was six and ten now, a man grown, but even men needed comfort. She knew tomorrow he'd deny it ever happened. He was usually the one trying to take care of and protect the others. Especially his mother. Alaric looked similar to Jae, if you ignored his build, eyes and straight hair. Both had the long faces of the Starks and both had the beauty of their other houses in spades. Both the Daynes and Targaryens were known for such. Mix it with the wildness of the North and they were even more handsome than Rhaegar. Something Arthur would’ve teased him about mercilessly.
Oswell was trying to cheer up Rhaenys with his dark wit but Rhaenys looked like she didn’t even know he was there. She just stared straight ahead, rubbing Balerion. The fierce cat eventually hissed at Oz and he ran away with his tail between his legs, muttering about demon cats and what a nice pair of slippers they’d make. As if that cat would ever let Oz or anyone not Rhaenys catch him. She’d never admit it but that black furball scared her as well, and though Oswell was joking, she wasn’t sure he was actually wrong about the demon bit.
Jyanna and Howland must’ve left the room, she hadn’t even noticed. Had no idea how long it’d been since they were here, except that her tea was no longer piping hot but nicely warm. She took a sip, just to go through the motions and was surprised by how good it tasted. The crannogmen were known for their herbs and medicines, as well as they were for their poisons and their magic of the earth. She wouldn’t be surprised if this tea was supposed to help her in some way, mayhap calm her down? She wished she could sleep. It would make the time from now until she knew what had happened to by quicker. It seemed better than just sitting in the worthless pain and regret.
She’d failed Rhaegar, he’d loved all his children fiercely yet all their plans to protect them had failed and only two remained and sweet, brilliant Elia was lost as well. Lyanna herself had survived by the skin of her teeth and only because Ashara disregarded Rhaegar’s order and sent Starfall’s maester to the Tower of Joy. Rhaella would’ve died too if not for the healer Varys sent with her or Lucerys Velaryon smartly abandoning the fleet to an upcoming storm and moving Rhaella, Viserys and the treasury to Starfall. That’s where they made their plans before dividing the treasure and going their separate ways.
She still didn’t know how all of their planning had crashed into dust. She had suspicions but no proof. She only knew that their letters to her father and brothers had never arrived. That someone had either made up seeing her be kidnapped or knew the truth and lied to Brandon anyway. She knew their plot to get Elia, Aegon and Rhaenys out went up in smoke. Forcing Elia to stay behind, forced to part with her daughter. It was either all of them or only Rhaenys. Aerys kept a close eye on Aegon and despite him disliking Elia, Aegon looked like a ‘true dragon’ and was prized. Elia knew Aegon was at least safe from Aerys, Rhaenys was not, she was too Dornish in Aerys’ eyes, a weak halfbreed. None of them had thought to worry much about enemies without.
They had known Ned would never countenance the killing of an innocent woman and her babes. If only he had gotten there first. Lyanna may be angry at Ned right now, but she had known he’d not stand for that. She was right, Ned was furious and disgusted. But not enough to stop loving Robert and seeing him as a brother. Baratheon had smiled and called his nephew’s brother, and who they thought was his sister, ‘dragonspawn’. Robert and Jon Arryn had cared not a whit that Elia, kind Elia, was raped by a monster that had her infant son’s blood and brains on his hands, before cleaving her almost in two. If they had disapproved at all they would’ve at least killed the Mountain and Lorch, even smarter would have been to give them to Prince Doran. Tywin Lannister would have handed them over easily in return for his daughter as queen. Their non action was tacit consent. Who could love men that would do such a thing?
Worst of all, she’d failed her son. If she ever saw him again, would he scorn her? Could she ever make up for the love and care he’d lacked growing up, for letting him be treated in such a way that he thought a brotherhood of rapists and thieves was his only escape? How could he, when Lyanna couldn’t forgive herself? Lyanna would prefer to suffer his hate, than never see him again as he froze on the Wall.
She knew Rhaenys blamed her, if only in part, for her not being able to grow up beside the only brother left to her. Even worse than that is what Rhaella would do. Rhaella was polite to Lyanna and loved and supported Jae, even from so far away, but she resented Lyanna for her part in the downfall of House Targaryen. Lyanna supposed it was easier to resent her gooddaughter than her dead firstborn. Something Lyanna couldn’t begrudge her for, she’d likely be the same. Rhaella would never forgive her for losing Rhaegar’s only remaining son, as well as their best hope for retaking the throne.
Viserys could become their king, he’d have to if Jae had taken the black. The problem lay in his temperament. Viserys was too entitled, too arrogant. He at least loves his family, though he could do without me, i’m sure, but at least he didn’t transfer his dislike of her onto his nephew. Rhaella had seen to that. Lyanna was grateful she had survived for many reasons, reigning in Viserys and teaching him to be an asset to their family was only one of them. Viserys had high hopes and studied often so he could benefit them the most. Lyanna was sure he’d be in a rage when he learned of this. He’d want to immediately start taking heads. He had a touch of his father’s temper, but luckily not the madness.
Lyanna’s eyes had finally started to droop. That sweet smelling tea had done what Jyanna had hoped it would. Lyanna would need to thank her profusely.
Just when Lyanna was about to stand and go find her bed, Rhaenys finally spoke up, “All we can do is wait and pray, Mother Lyanna.” Then she walked over and grabbed Lyanna’s hand, dropping her cat to the floor, her eyes were fierce, and her face set in determination. “And all those that betrayed us will pay, Winter is Coming, with Fire and Blood. We will remain Unbowed, Unbent, Unbroken.”
Lyanna couldn’t muster a shred of sympathy that those words, that threat, was levelled at the only big brother remaining to her. If he stood in their way or betrayed them again she’d send him to the Wall like he’d done to her son. If he fought against them, his only recourse would be death. Lyanna had her pack, her son, her step daughter, her goodmother and Rhaegar’s siblings, Arthur, Ashara and her son, Alaric, the only piece of her wild wolf brother left to her, the Reeds, Oz and Gerold and the only true brother remaining to her, Benjen. She’d never hurt her nieces and nephews, but their mother and her house would have no mercy and unless their father rejoined his actual family, neither would he.