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Your name is Karkat Vantas and love is in the air every-fucking-where you look around. Not meaning to be a sour pussy that you usually are, but you think all these motherfuckers should get a room, for fuck's sake.
It seems like every single one of your friends is in a relationship now, which leaves you completely alone. Even that weed-head that is your best friend has a date -- and guess what?! She's your fucking childhood crush! Your other 3 good friends also have their Valentines, which, to be honest, you still can't believe. Maybe Kanaya and Rose weren't so much of a shock but Sollux and Eridan and John and Vriska sure were.
Yet again, here you are, the fuck alone in this sea of lobsters finding their lobsters. It wouldn't be so bad if it wasn't for the fact that all of them seem to be very excited in playing matchmaker!
What will you do?
======> Karkat: Abscond
Haha just kidding! Of course you can't abscond.
Even with all your efforts, your friends are too convincing for you to flee (and by convincing you mean that these assholes are an endless well of shameful stuff you've done and are just simply blackmailing you). So that's why you see yourself in the worst case scenario ever: in a double blind date.
======> Karkat: Be on a date.
Now this is the only option available for you. It's a Friday night and it's almost time for your double-date. You surely want to kill everyone for this extraordinary idea. With a sigh, you exit your shower. You try to tame your wild brown hair, but it seems really against smoothing, and you can't help but relate. If you could, you still would not comply with all this stuff.
"Karkat, it will be a fancy dinner, so dress up!" You remember your African American friend telling you, and of course she would conveniently have a tuxedo exactly your size! Insert fucking shocked audience gasps here! You roll your eyes at the memory. Fucking really, Kanaya?
Well, good thing it was indeed a beautiful tuxedo. It was made with a silk satin fabric in the lapel, and rayon in the rest, fitting perfectly on your shoulders, tightening a little on your waist. The pants where made of the same fabric and they were slightly tight, so your "awethome ath" would be visible, as the asshole hacker said. The inner shirt was black, and the tie was a deep red, almost matching the color of your unusual eyes.
That reminds you of when you were little, and how your classmates always spread shitty rumors saying you were a demon. You used to say you'd like to be one, so you could send these fuckers to fucking hell and make them suffer. But you aren't a demon, and you can't send anyone to hell (your friends should be thankful for that), although you are just about to go to hell yourself. Without knowing exactly why, you choose your best perfume and put it on. That's when you hear a horn outside -- your ride is here. Yes, you do have a license and yes, you do own a car, but Gamzee and Terezi wouldn't let you drive yourself.
Everybody (including you) knows that you wouldn't go if you had to drive there. You try to smooth your hair once more, in vain, then grab your wallet and keys and leave. It's gonna be a long, long night.
======> Karkat: Be the first one to arrive.
When you arrive, you ask for the reservation under the name of Lalonde. Since she was the only one who knew everyone in this date, she made the reservation, which would be easy for everyone involved in this fucking idea. They tell you no one of the other 3 people arrived yet, and ask if you'd like to wait. You say you prefer to go and sit already and thank them with a forced smile. You sit down and are tempted to drink some wine, however you stop yourself. You know you can't handle your liquor so well, and these nooksuckers are probably going to make a toast, so you'd better save your liver as much as you can. You stick with water instead.
Given the local your table is placed, you can see pretty much every person who enters in the restaurant without them seeing you. You are glad the majority of them aren't your peers in this date. Suddenly, a pale young man with platinum hair enters. His tuxedo is almost the same as yours, which maybe is a sign you're in this together. You feel sorry for yourself, ‘cause this boy surely dresses it better. You know that this date will suck.
He is headed towards your table and the next thing you notice about this boy is that the poor thing is blind. It shouldn't make you feel better, but you do. You don't have much time to think, since the stranger is already at your table.
"Sup." He says.
"Hey." You answer, standing. He holds out a hand, and you’re impressed by how he can tell your location. Blind people surely are amazing. You take that hand into yours and shake it.
"Dave Strider, it's a pleasure" he says in a monotone voice.
"Karkat Vantas, same." You answer, in a similar tone. You can feel that, just like you, he's not really interested in being there, which is kind of a relief to say the least. You two sit down and proceed to have an amazing awkward silence. You sip from your glass, and Strider raises one of his eyebrows, as if he knew the content of your glass and was just judging you. Blind people sure are amazing, you think again.
You're still stuck in that 'should I talk or should I hush' when two girls approach your table. The shortest wears an avocado green dress that goes more or less to her knees. The other one, wears a black with green dress, being the green little spots made of something that looked like glitter. Both of them had green eyes. The tall one had wavy long black hair and the short had ginger bob hair. They were both really beautiful, but you can't help staring at the male right in front of you. More than ever you are pitting Dave for being blind. Dave and you stand at the same time, greeting the ladies.
"Hi, I'm Nepeta Leijon!" says the excited ginger lady.
"Jade Harley" Says the other, a little less excited.
"Karkat Vantas" You greet, trying not to sound as bored as before.
"Strider. Dave Strider" The blind says, with a smirk and you don't know how but you can *feel* he just winked. You have to try really hard not to roll your eyes.
The girls sat down and all of you ordered your meals and that glass of wine you're really glad you didn't ordered before. All the other three are engaged in some sort of conversation while you are peacefully eating and drinking. Sometimes Nepeta tries to strike a conversation with you, to which you answer as much as you can -- which, to be honest, isn't that much. You're really more interested on your stroganoff than anything else right now.
"Say, Vantas" Dave gets you out of your trance. "What do you do for a living?" You look at both Jade and Nepeta and, by the look on Jade's face, you notice Dave just cut her off from whatever she was saying to talk to you. It's kinda... weirdly astonishing.
"Hm... My family owns a petshop so...I work there. Washing dogs, cats, taking care of fish, stuff like that." You say with a slightly frown. It's a litle embarassing, but both girls seem to like it very much, once they proceed to ask you as many questions about dogs and cats as it is humanly possible. Dave just chuckles with their enthusiasm and you can swear you feel his gaze on you. Maybe just one glass was enough to make you drunk?
In the end, you find out that Dave is a DJ at a local nightclub, Jade works in a flower shop and Nepeta is a part-timer at the next city's kindergarten. You were led into talking more and more and that makes your head spin. You were never really good at social interactions, but after the third glass of wine you open up a little more. You even start to tease Dave for the way he's starting to talk with a slightly Texan accent, for which he just respond by teasing you by the way you are smiling and laughing a little too loud. You just flip him off and the girls giggle. Oh yeah, you had almost forgotten they were there. As they get up to go to the restroom, you are left alone with Dave again. His shaded eyes are on you, and you can't help but blurt out.
"It must be though, man."
"What?" He says, clearly confused.
"Being like you... You know, a friend of mine is the same. It must suck." Dave pauses. He has no idea of what you're talking about. Then it seems to dawn on him.
"Oh! Well, you get used to that. It's not that difficult, besides, chicks seem to dig it, you know?" He says, and you can tell he just winked again
"I don't know why someone would dig and disability"
"Wow, rude man!" He says, still monotone as ever, but with somewhat of a frown "Being albino is not an disability!" You pause.
You process this new information.
You prepare yourself for the most smart remark ever.
"What?"
"What?" he says, as confused as you.
"Aren't you blind?"
"Why the hell do you think that?!"
"The shades!" And at that, he cracks a smile, and chuckles lightly.
"Man! Sensitive eyes!" and he chuckles a little bit more, which causes you to blush. Not because he looks really adorable while doing that, but because you were really dumb to jump into conclusions.
"Oh. Yeah, hum... That makes sense, yeah." You say, embarassed.
"Vantas, you sure are funny man!" He says, wipping some tears off his eyes.
"Fuck you" you mumble. The girls come back and you order dessert.
After that you split and pay the bill. Nepeta and Jade decide to share a cab since they're heading the same direction. Nepeta hands you a piece of paper, and Jade hands Dave one. As you look down, it's their respective phone numbers. For some reason, you feel a little pissed off because of the other two, but you still smile for the little girl in front of you, thanking her and wishing a good night. She bounces and gives you a peck on your cheek. Jade does the same to Dave, then with you, and both of them enter the cab, waving you two goodbye.
You look at Dave and find that he's facing you, with eyes that you know now can see. You avert your eyes, scratching the back of your neck. Dave whistles for a cab, and before it parks, he asks you
"So, where are you going?" You think a little, mapping your way back home.
"Hmm... I live near the park, so I'm heading downtown first, yeah"
"The club where I work at is on the way, mind to share a cab?" He asks, stone-faced. You consider your options. Sharing would be nice.
"Yeah, sure." And you two enter. Inside the cab, you two talk about your mutual friends, and you get to find out that John is Dave's best friend.
"What a small world!" Dave says
"Yet I never run into Beyoncé" is your answer, to which causes Dave to chuckle again
"Nice quote, bro" he holds out a brofist to you, and you bump it with a fist of your own.
"Anyway, so you're the asshole John always talks about" you start, getting back to topic.
"And you must be the motherfucker who steals my best bro sometimes" he throws back
"Yes, that's me." You say, somewhat proud of that. You know he rolls his eyes at that.
"413 Night Club, sir" the cab driver says.
"Oh well, it seems it's time for us to part, Princess."
"Fuck off already, Strider" You say, but it's not a bitter remark. He catches your hand in his, giving it a light kiss, and it's your turn to roll your eyes.
When he's halfway outside the car, he looks back to ask you.
"Would you like to go inside and hear the sickest beats ever while looking at how awesome I am doing that, Princess Grumpy?" You look at the clock. Almost midnight. He looks at it too, and grins. "Oh, do you have to be home before midnight?"
"Shut the fuck up, Strider. Ok, I'm in. But it's all on you." You say, and you both go into his working place.
======> Karkat: Get wasted.
No, you're not getting wasted tonight. Even though Dave keeps asking the barman to give you all kinds of drinks, you just dismiss every fucking one of them.
It's true that you're alone at the bar, but you're surely having a good time. Dave is a great DJ, you can't deny that. It's not long before some people from both genres, completely drunk, start
hitting on you. You just tell them to go to hell and fuck themselves, which works every time. You've never liked clubs exactly because of this, and you thought of going home at least 10 times, but whenever you looked at Dave you gave up. He looked like a god up in the booth, and it got you stuck in place. It was around two when you accepted one of the drinks the barman, Jake, handed you. He promised it was a weak one, and it tasted like it. You didn't feel much difference, thankfully. It took another hour or so for Dave to get down. He got a drink that Jake handed him and drank in one go; it surely wasn't water, nor any normal soda or energy drink, but you don't say a thing.
"Are you done for today?" You shout. Dave put some record to play when he went down.
"Yeah, pretty much." He doesn't shout, but you can hear him fairly good. "I just have to wait some more minutes until my shift is indeed over. Will you wait for me, Princess?" he smirks.
"If you weren't paying for my ride back, I'd say I'm not." You sigh and he looks puzzled. "Well, I did say it was all on you." You shrug, sipping from a bottle of water you asked Jake.
"You're such a smartass, Vantas..." Dave says, emotionless. "But I like that" This comment throws you off a little bit and you just don't know how to answer. You nod. Dave excuses himself and goes gather his things. After around 10 minutes he's back and you go out the club. You can't deny you're a little dizzy, not because of the drink but because it's almost 4am and you're tired. Also, social interaction and fricking loud music are a bonus. You can feel a headache starting to build up, and you're surely getting grumpy -- you always get like this when you're sleepy. A cab pulls near and Dave opens the door for you, bowing.
"Thanks, Prince Charming" you say, your voice dripping with sarcasm, and you make sure to show him your middle finger. He chuckles and gets in with you.
The ride back is quiet, both of you clearly tired. It doesn't take long before the cab driver announces that you're home. When you're about to get off, Dave does the same thing as before: holds your hand in his and gives it a kiss.
"See ya, Vantas."
"Yeah, whatever" you say, pissed. You need sleep as soon as possible. You shut the door and, before the cab goes away, Dave rolls down the window and tells you.
"Hey, Vantas, don't forget to send me a message so I can have your number." And you can tell he has just winked at you again. The cab drives off, and you're a little puzzled.
"How am I supposed to text this fucker if I don't even..."
You stop. It's only then that you feel a piece of paper on the hand Strider was holding. In it, you have some numbers and a name written in red crayon. Yes, crayon, of all things. "xxx-xxxx - Prince Charming" You roll your eyes, but also feels a small smile in your lips.
Maybe that idea your friends had wasn't that bad. Maybe if you were a demon you wouldn't send them to hell, or at least not right now.
And maybe, just maybe, even demons can fall in love.
