Work Text:
Oh, man, she is something. She is many things. Oh, hell, she’s all of the things.
You knew from the moment she yelled at you on Trollian that you were a fool for her.
…Well, okay, you feel that way about everyone you meet. Well, not everyone. Just the mass majority of them. As for everyone else, you’re happy to at least pretend you feel that way about them if it means you’ll get any sort action coming your direction but WHATEVER, THAT’S NOT IMPORTANT RIGHT NOW.
The important part is Meenah Peixes, once Heiress to the Beforan throne, is something, and human God almighty you wish you could have just a tiny bit of it.
You met her—as you implied before—on Trollian. Quite by accident. You know, you were just scoping out a few chatrooms, talking to a few people about magic embarrassingly enough, and scoping random profiles to find any cute/sexy/hot/all of the above trolls online. Which, considering you were pretty much open to anyone even then (especially since you were into that embarrassingly fake thing called magic), meant basically any person who was online. And, of course, you found her quite unceremoniously, though it didn’t click that she was the Heiress until you saw her typing in all caps.
CC: G-ET T)(A FUCK OUTTA MY C)(AT WINDOWS BUOY
Oooh, man was she an angry one. Well, is. And she never stopped giving you grief, nor has she stopped now. Of course, she wasn’t the first to give you grief, and she wouldn’t be the last to be sure. But what made her grief so special to you—so worth the struggle, though a struggle it may be—was that out of everyone who had the gall to attack you for romantic advances that you honestly think everyone should feel obliged to receive from royalty like yourself, she didn’t go for the one thing everyone else attacked.
You could see that swarm of messages now. “Wizard nerd,” “magic freak”…so many cruel words for a sensitive soul such as yourself. You can of course understand why those people would say those things (especially now that you have renounced your faith in magic), and it did help give you a good list of people who were just unequivocally awful in every way.
But Meenah…she was different.
Yeah, she cursed and scowled at all of your romantic attempts, but she never attacked you for that one thing. Magic. Of all the easy things that could be used against you at that time, she instead attacked you for most everything else instead.
Hey, maybe it’s a little cheesy. But you liked that about her. And to this day—even after renouncing your faith—you still like that about her.
Well…that, and some other things, if we get what you’re dropping. And as she struts her something down your way, you can’t help but positioning yourself in front of her to say hi.
“Hello, Meenah,” you begin, so very nonchalantly and cool-like. “Howv vwould you like to—“
Her fist smashes into your face, and you’re immediately on the ground. She just steps over you like you’re nothing.
“Not havin’ it today, Cro,” she says, walking nimbly off.
Man. The minx. She’ll be the death of you, you’re sure.
…Well, aside from her blowing you and everyone else up that time during the game.