Archive of Our Own

Chapter Text

In truth, Silas was just relieved that after all this fighting, after all this bloodshed, Nohr and Hoshido finally believed in Corrin. He could see how much this war was straining Corrin. He’d lose sleep over it and pretend that everything was fine.

It wasn’t. Silas was no stranger to nightmares despite his general outward appearance and it seemed that shocked Corrin a great deal when he confessed to that. He didn’t delve into details, it wasn’t about him, he didn’t go to talk about himself, but he managed to get Corrin to talk about their nightmares. Silas was just happy to be there for his friend, even if he wasn’t quite sure Corrin remembered him yet. It was a painful truth that lingered between them, but Silas tried hard to let that show.

Often, it made him wonder what Nohr did to Corrin to make him forget about Silas like that. Knowing how they functioned, how cruel they were and could be, Silas couldn’t doubt anything. They were all possibilities as terrifying of a prospect as that was.

“You alright there Silas?” Corrin asked breaking him out of his reverie. “I don’t think I have seen you frown that hard before.” He joked lightly. Silas smiled and laughed waving off his concern as they walked to the dining hall.

“Just relieved that we’re all fighting one enemy,” Silas replied. “Though the tension is…”

Then Corrin’s smile was gone, and Silas silently cursed himself for bringing up such a sensitive subject again when that was the last thing Corrin needed.

“You’re right,” Corrin agreed solemnly. “They don’t trust each other, and I mean I get why, but…”

“I get it,” really he did. They had this conversation the other night when Corrin couldn’t sleep. “Have you spoken to Lord Xander or Lord Ryoma about it yet?”

Corrin shook his head, “I probably should though yeah? I’ve just been so caught up with everything. With Scarlet—”

Of course. Scarlet. That had hit Lord Ryoma in particular pretty hard. A part of him had wondered if there had been something more but really that wasn’t any of his business.

“You’re coming to the strategy meeting right?” Corrin asked abruptly.

“Yeah,” Silas replied shortly. If only for moral support because the army could honestly use a boost in morale. Though, some of the looks he got from the Nohrians made him wonder if he was even welcome there. He tried to be nice to everyone, but being branded as a traitor was frustrating. He had heard that from a few people since following Corrin.

He stood by his decision firmly. There were no regrets.

All he could really imagine was nearly being executed again, and this time for good reason.

Silas shoved those thoughts aside and put on his usual smile, it came easy. It never felt forced. He was generally an optimistic person, but some days he was just tired. Today was particularly long. It made Silas wonder what they were really fighting.

The march was long the next morning, that was what they determined if they went the direction they went. He remained particularly silent in the discussion. There wasn’t much to contribute in the meetings if you weren’t one of the royal family members or called upon. Silas reveled in the silence. It was a chance to regather himself.

His gaze caught Xander’s once and for a second, Silas feared that he had been called upon and hadn’t noticed, but it quickly shifted and the conversation kept moving in a heated debate between Lord Xander and Lord Ryoma. By his side, he felt Corrin shift uncomfortably and Silas nudged him gently to calm him down. Corrin’s gaze only met his briefly, but he visibly calmed down and began trying to calm the situation.

It was a good thing that they were all together, but there was so much they had to work through before it could even be considered a cohesive group.

It was obvious on the battlefield. There were accidents during the fight. Hoshidans who could have helped Nohrians rushed to their Hoshidan comrades who weren’t in need. Nohrians blatantly ignored a call for help from Hoshidans. It was a mess. Honestly, even the optimism in Silas couldn’t find a way to make it out to be better than it was. How were they supposed to even consider working together when Lord Xander and Lord Ryoma still had unbearable tension between the two of them.

They were united because of Corrin, but if they couldn’t put their differences aside, nothing would come of it.

“I’m going to try to talk to Ryoma,” Corrin said with a long sigh after they had sat in his treehouse for a while. “I think that’s what I need to do first. Then maybe have them both just talk it out together?”

Silas smiled, “I think they’re both very reasonable, you know? I’m sure if you talk to them they’ll listen.” You have that effect on people.

Corrin beamed, “You think so?”

“Of course,” Silas laughed softly.

“You know Silas,” Corrin began quieter than before suddenly seeming very subdued. Silas’s heart clenched and he suddenly felt nervous. “In truth, I’ve really only just met Ryoma. I don’t know him as well as Xander, and as much as I love Xander… I find Ryoma much easier to talk to.”

Silas didn’t really know what to say to that. It was no lie, Xander was a hard man. There was a permanent frown etched on his face and he held an air of superiority always that made him difficult to approach, even for his own siblings. Lord Ryoma commanded attention, but he had a friendly air about him that made him easier to talk to. Silas had several conversations with him since the union between the two armies. Silas had barely managed to utter a word to Xander since arriving here and he had known Xander since childhood.

He—

A part of Silas would like to think that maybe Xander remembered that childhood. There were times when Xander just looked as if he didn’t recognize Silas and if that didn’t hurt, Silas didn’t know what would.

“I’m sure that’s just how he feels he has to be Corrin,” Silas muttered trying to find some way to comfort Corrin. “I’m sure if it’s just you two he’ll be more open to conversation. He has a soft spot for you.”

“I’m sure of that,” Corrin grinned. “Thanks for listening to me Silas. I’ll go talk to Ryoma now.”

“That’s what best friends are for.”

Even as those words left his lips he began to doubt it. Corrin didn’t remember him. A part of him wanted to make Corrin remember him. Another part of him felt as if it was unfair to push himself onto him so much.

But Corrin nodded with that alluring smile, “Best friends.”

He left, yet there was almost a question hanging off that end of that as if he was trying to reconcile with that concept.

Self-proclaimed best friend, that’s how everyone thought of him when he tried to convince Corrin that they were best friends.

He follows him like his loyal dog.

What a kiss-up.

Nohrian traitor.

“Your strikes are more aggressive today, Silas,” Silas nearly fell off his horse upon hearing the voice and swung wide only for his sword to be parried. “I hadn’t meant to startle you, my apologies.”

Silas inhaled a sharp breath when he turned around to see Lord Xander standing before him with a practice sword out looking understandably surprised.

“Lord Xander,” Silas finally managed to speak. “I’m so sorry milord, I hadn’t meant to strike at you.” How utterly embarrassing.

“I gathered,” Xander said matter-of-factly. “Would you be willing to spar?”

How could he say no?

“Of course, milord,” Silas regathered himself and lost himself to the flow of the spar. He wasn’t at his best, he would accept that. He was probably at his worst. Xander noticed it and mercifully ended the spar before he could embarrass himself further.

“What is on your mind, Silas?” Xander had asked him after giving the spar a second try and Silas just couldn't bring the energy for it.

“Nothing, milord,” Silas answered. “Just a little tired.”

Xander hummed evidently not believing Silas, “Tired of what?”

People. Giving and giving and giving, and only receiving hate in return.

Silas decided that would not be the best answer, “The battle yesterday was a mess, Lord Xander. I spent much of it trying to help my comrades in need, that is all. I’m just recovering from it still.”

“The battle yesterday was a mess,” Xander nodded with a grimace. “Our people and the Hoshidans could not work together, as to be expected. Being thrust into such a situation and to mend relationships with your former enemy so quickly would be difficult.”

“Corrin was really concerned about that,” Silas admitted. “He plans on talking to you about it soon.”

Xander simply nodded again, “Is that all on your mind?”

Silas wasn’t known for lying, but it came easily when it came to this, “Yes, Lord Xander. I appreciate the concern.”

Xander didn’t push it, but a part of Silas wished he had.

The next battle and the battle after that wasn’t much better and they were getting pushed back further and further. The arguments it spurred up in the war council were tense. No voice raised, but the stiffness in the two eldest sons and discomfort radiating off of Corrin and the other siblings made the hair on the back of Silas’s neck rise.

Someone stop them. Someone get them to calm down.

Because Corrin looked like he was about to panic. He looked miserable and Silas hated that look. It was the look he had when Silas had denied him so many things when they were children.

Who was he to stand in between the argument of two future kings though? He was a castle knight with one solely devoted cause.

But Xander used to be his friend—he thought at least. And Ryoma and he had shared several conversations that he would consider “friendly”. It still didn’t feel right.

“If I may,” Silas swallowed thickly when the room suddenly fell silent “I don’t think the problem lies with any one side.” He felt the eyes of every noble, of every worthy soldier that reminded him of his place at this table.

Corrin nodded, and Silas was hoping desperately that it meant he would step in. When he didn’t, Silas cleared his throat and continued.

“Despite any and all best efforts, both sides have been fighting each other on and off of the battlefield, and I mean that quite literally. Even now, I’ve broken up fights between both Nohrians and Hoshidans fighting each other in the middle of battle,” Silas tried to ignore the daggers being pierced into his back. “Both equally at fault. But I also feel as if they need a better starting point and foundation. Right now it’s fractured because of the past and tension between our countries, but…” Silas drones off and Corrin glanced at him with an eager expression before nodding.

“The leaders should be the first step to encouraging stronger bonds,” bless Corrin for stepping in. “It’s a partnership!”

But Xander’s eyes were transfixed on Silas as if he wanted him to keep speaking. There was nothing more to contribute, so Silas hoped he could fade into the background as Corrin took charge of the conversation.

“What were you about to say?” Xander said before they began sparring. “During the war council, you seemed to have had more to say.”

“Corrin summed it up actually,” Silas smiled because it wasn’t necessarily a lie.

Xander stared at Silas for a long while, “Is that so?”

Silas nodded and remained mute not trusting his voice to not betray him.

There was a long sigh before, “You’ve changed Silas.”

Silas froze momentarily, “In a good way or a bad way?”

“I can’t tell just yet.”

Xander carried on with the spar, but Silas couldn’t shake what Xander had said. How had he changed? Xander hadn’t seen him since his banishment so of course, Silas had changed. He had aged ten years.

But what did the crown prince expect from him?

——————-

“That was reckless Silas,” Corrin scolded with a frown deeply etched into his face. “You could’ve died.”

“I had to!” Silas reasoned. “If I didn’t then those villagers would’ve been killed by those faceless.”

“Charging in alone?” Corrin tightened the bandages more than reasonably needed. Silas winced and bit back a groan. “ If you had just waited we all would have been there in time.”

“No,” Silas knew he was right. He barely made it in time. “If I didn’t do what I did, we’d be burying those villagers.” Silas huffed when Corrin glared at him, “I don’t regret it.”

Corrin remained silent. He knew there was no arguing with Silas when it came to saving innocents. Silas did it for him though. That was his pledge to Corrin as his best friend. If Silas had charged in and saved them, and the villagers died, Corrin would have blamed himself and made himself miserable.

“Sorry Corrin,” Silas smiled softly. “But you would have done the same.”

Corrin smirked at that, but Silas could see the glistening in his eyes. He was trying not to cry. Gods, had he scared him that badly? “I would’ve, but that doesn’t mean you go do stupid things.”

“Rather me than you,” Silas replied casually. “We need you more than anyone right now.”

Corrin froze. Red eyes shot up to look at Silas and the knight wondered where he went wrong, “That’s not true. My life isn’t more important than anyone else’s.”

In hindsight, that was a bad choice of words, and Silas apologized profusely. It was a sensitive subject for Corrin. His importance in regards to everyone else. Everyone always regarded Corrin with an unreal level of respect, even the princes.

“Sorry,” Silas apologized again. Corrin shrugged it off and told him he didn’t need to apologize anymore, but Silas knew that he messed up. He never was great at giving advice or talking to people after hearing so many sob stories in one day. Silas wanted to be nice to everyone, but he didn’t know how to respond to every soldier’s woes no matter how hard he tried.

Well, not every soldier. He still got the occasional insult or traitor thrown his way, but he’s managed to block that out and keep smiling.

“Silas,” Ryoma smiled at him. “It’s a pleasure to see you.”

“Oh, hello Lord Ryoma,” Silas greeted with a slight bow. “Going for a walk?”

“Indeed,” Ryoma breathed deeply. “I need some fresh air.”

“Are you and Lord Xander…?”

Ryoma laughed heartily, “We are working things out slowly. I’m sorry for all the strain we’ve put you and Corrin under.”

“I’m fine—”

“No one in this army is fine when the leaders can’t work together properly, no?” Ryoma gave Silas a knowing smirk. “I appreciate you stepping in when you did the other day.”

“I didn’t say anything important.”

“You were thinking it.”

He was thinking a lot of things frankly. That was one of the more prevailing thoughts.

“You know,” Ryoma began, “you scared us today when you went charging in like that.”

Oh, “My apologies, Prince Ryoma,” Silas stuttered. “I hadn’t realized that it was going to be such a big deal.”

Ryoma laughed then, loud and boisterous, “You wouldn’t, you and your selflessness. Corrin was beside himself. The Nohrian siblings as well.”

He hadn’t expected that. Maybe, Elise, he didn’t know Leo all that well, Camilla was a worrywart, but mainly concerning her siblings and he knew Xander was always particularly hard to read. That came as news to him.

“Be more careful,” Ryoma had a way of calming Silas down. He smiled and nodded as Ryoma and he carried on their walk silently.

————————

“Do we really know what we’re up against?” Leo asked and all eyes were on Azura. It was rare that she showed up at these war council meetings. Azura was quiet, mysterious, but has loyally stuck by Corrin’s side. Despite his suspicions of her, she hadn’t done anything to hurt Corrin. He had no reason to act on such suspicions.

Azura remained calm and it was the same ambiguous answer. There was no way for us to fully expect anything that they were going to be fighting. At that point, they were going in blindly. No one was particularly confident about this turn of events.

Valla was hell.

It was obvious that no one was gaining a motivational boost from their predicament. Stress kept growing and the tension was miserable. The situation wasn’t hopeless. Silas tried to convince some soldiers of that. They were going to win. If they stuck with Corrin, everything would work out.

But they all claimed the same thing.

“Listen,” Silas persisted. “It’ll work out, but we need both sides to work together!”

The soldiers snickered, “Yeah, yeah, considering you left Nohr without a second thought, we’ll just ‘work together’! Fuck off, traitor.”

Silas tried to not let that bother him and kept going calmly, “This isn’t about me.” It wasn’t, so why did they keep turning the conversation to him? “This is something both Prince Ryoma and Prince Xander want. It’s what Corrin wants! We can’t win if we let each other get killed.”

A Hoshidan soldier huffed, “Let bygones be bygones? They killed our king!”

The Nohrian soldier looked stricken, there was no response for a second, then the conversation took a turn. “So what? Hoshido is fine!”

“This is not the conversation we’re having,” Silas tried to placate. “Listen, Nohr was wrong for that. The king was wrong for that, it’s unforgivable, but—”

“Now you’re disowning our king?!”

“Ha, look at Silas trying to be all ambivalent,” one of the Nohrians growled. “Fucking Nohrian traitor.”

“At least he knows that his king was wrong,” the Hoshidan soldier spat.

And then punches were thrown, and no matter how hard Silas tried to stay out of it and stop the fight, he got dragged in. The punch left his jaw bruised and feeling pretty miserable. It took shouting from someone else outside of the fight for it to stop. The other soldiers quickly sauntered off before the other could make it over.

“Silas, are you alright?” it was Xander who stopped it.

The knight rubbed his jaw and nodded, “Thank you for breaking up the fight Lord Xander. It got out of hand. I’m sorry that it happened.”

Xander’s brows furrowed, “What happened?”

Silas decidedly refrained from mentioning how he had completely disowned the king of Nohr—Xander’s father—but the man scared him and it needed to be faced. King Garon ruled on fear now, not so much respect, “It was just the debate on both sides trying to work together.”

The crown prince looked as if he wanted to add something. He looked frustrated and an unreasonable part of Silas blamed himself for what happened. It wasn’t like he brought the topic up, but they had dragged him into it as if he would choose sides.

“You should get your jaw looked at, Silas,” Xander’s expression softened briefly. “That bruise looks rather painful.”

Silas allowed himself a small chuckle, “It stings for sure.”

“Lord Xander?” a voice came from the dark. “Isn’t it late? Shouldn’t you be in your quarters?” Silas turned and watched as Laslow and Odin closed the distance between them. “Oh, Silas? You as well?”

“What are you doing out so late yourself, Laslow?” Xander looked between the two retainers. “You as well Odin?”

Laslow dodged the question and it was obvious Xander was used to it, “Silas, what happened friend? Have you gotten yourself into a fight?”

“Unfortunately, yes.”

“You should’ve called upon us,” Odin exclaimed. “I, Odin Dark, would have been able to stop the enemy—”

Silas appreciated Odin’s excitement, but he was honestly exhausted, “It was just a quarrel between some soldiers.”

“Just a quarrel” implied a lot though and Odin’s expression immediately fell and Laslow’s expression sobered from his usual smirk.

“This is quite a difficult situation isn’t it?” Laslow supplied in the silence. “We have to at least make a cohesive unit.”

“We do,” Xander grimaced and eyed the bruise on Silas’s chin. “We all have to make an effort, but if the effort will be met with force, I suppose I will have to talk to Prince Ryoma about this account.”

Well, it wasn’t a Hoshidan that actually landed the punch on my face. Actually, I disrespected the King and I’ve been branded a traitor nonstop since I came here; I’ve just confirmed that. If I was in Nohr and I said that, I would’ve been put on the execution block immediately.

Again.

But Silas can’t bring that up to Xander.

“It was both Nohrians and Hoshidans, milord,” Silas said simply.

“No surprise really,” Laslow shrugged and looked at Odin.

Odin nodded, “We’ve had to deal with a few of those ourselves.”

Laslow walked to Xander’s side, “It is late though. We can deal with those things in the morning.”

“Agreed,” Xander took a step back. “I insist you get that bruise checked out Silas.”

“Of course.”

He didn’t. In truth, he was too bone-tired to make his way to a cleric. The pain in the morning was enough to let him know that he probably should have taken those extra steps to be seen by the cleric. Silas groaned and made his way over, not without a few odd looks from those around him—luckily none of the soldiers from last night were there. Xander, however, he did run into and that was probably worse than the others because he distinctly remembers Xander telling him multiple times to go see a cleric.

Xander’s hard red eyes glaring at him from across the way was enough for Silas to get the message.

You should’ve listened.

He should’ve done a lot of things, but in his time, he had rarely listened. That’s why he was banished in the first place. Maybe that should have taught him something—nearly being executed is a life-changing experience. Apparently, it’s not enough for him to really think and listen though.

Elise gasped audibly when she saw Silas’s face and rushed to him before he even made it into the tent, “Silas, what happened?”

“Just a fight,” Silas shrugged and smiled a little at Elise. “Good morning Princess.”

“Morning!” she exclaimed noting the slip-up but actively gauging the damage. “Another one? Did you throw yourself in front of a faceless again?” It was meant to be a jest, but Silas could see the visible worry on her face.

“Not so soon after, no,” he laughed lightly. “Just tried to settle a quarrel between soldiers and got one in the face for doing so.”

Disappointment filtered onto her face, “Another one? Again? So soon?”

All the same questions he had.

“Yeah,” he mumbled as she began working on his face. “Slow progress.”

“Yeah,” she repeated with a hint of sadness that never really suit Elise and her bubbly personality. They settled into silence, mainly because Silas didn’t want to mess her up or add to his own pain.

Eventually, she sat back as if to admire her work and gave him a thumbs-up, “Looks great!”

“Thanks,” her enthusiasm was contagious, to say the least.

Silas kept his distance for the most part. He listened when people wanted him to, gave advice when requested. He helped with the chores around the camp to prepare for their march. His jaw didn’t hurt as much, so it was easier to talk to others, but Corrin missed nothing.

“Gods, Silas, what happened?” Corrin reached up to touch his jaw and stopped short with a look of shock. “Does it hurt?”

Silas tried his best to give Corrin a reassuring smile that he would believe because he never did in these situations, “Just a little quarrel. I’m fine though. Elise looked it over this morning.”

“Just a little—this happened this morning?” Corrin’s eyes widened. “How did I miss that?”

“No, last night,” the knight shrugged. “I tried to stop it, but, well, got hit pretty hard.”

“You just got it looked at?” the young man looked so concerned and Silas quickly tried to wave it off. “Silas—”

“Corrin, Corrin! I’m fine, I’m fine, don’t worry,” Silas chuckled despite the pout on his friend’s face. “Lord Xander showed up and stopped it.”

There was silence for a while. Silas could see the gears turning in his head. There was guilt etched into his face. He blamed himself for this, wrongfully so. This situation was tough for everyone, there really was no reason for Corrin to blame himself for this.

You can’t just mend this relationship when so many wrongs had been committed.

“Corrin, it’s not your fault,” Silas placed a gentle hand on his friend’s shoulder. “You aren’t responsible for everyone’s actions. It’ll take time for this tension to quell, but it’s not all on you. We’re all responsible.”

Corrin sighed wearily and gave a small smile, “I know, but—it’s just…” another heavy sighed, “I wanted everyone to come together and work together. I mean, Ryoma and Xander still haven’t made amends.”

“It’ll take time,” Silas insisted. “It’s hard to just forget everything that has happened. Have you spoken to Prince Xander yet?”

Shaking his head, he stood to look out towards where Xander stood, “Not yet.”

“Maybe start there,” Silas followed his gaze. “You don’t have to carry this burden on your own. Your siblings are here for you, I am, all the people that chose to follow you. Corrin, it’ll all work out.”

“Thanks, Silas.”

“Of course,” he grinned.

————————

In horror, he watched as one of his comrades was knocked down as he was pinned by another one of these damn invisible soldiers. Silas pushed back as fiercely as he could to get to them, but from the corner of his eyes, he could see that finally strike and the cry of agony and blood leave their lips.

Damn it. Damn it. Damn it.

It wasn’t his responsibility. Their partner that was supposed to be covering their back had gone off on their own again. Silas ran his lance through the being in front of him and still made his way to check on the fallen soldier just to make sure that there was truly no life left.

“Silas…” he gurgled.

Oh. It was one of the men who had clocked him in the face earlier in the week. Shit.

Silas removed his fingers from his pulse point and plunged his lance through a soldier that was charging at him. They flew off their horse and Silas gritted his teeth as the horse nearly took him down. His horse bucked and he reacted quickly to try and calm it. The man was bleeding out and there was a highly unlikely chance that he would survive even if a cleric came.

Sakura rushed over and Silas quickly rushed to cover her to make sure nothing happened to her. He could see the tears budding in her eyes as she tried her best to heal the fallen Nohrian soldier and all Silas could think about was how Sakura shouldn’t be here—her youth and innocence shouldn’t be tainted like this.

She doesn’t deserve this.

Then again, who did?

The situation was getting dire, and Silas didn’t think he could let Sakura stay much longer, “Princess! We can’t stay here much longer.”

“But, I,” she stuttered and glanced back at the fallen soldier. He looked at the princess with pleading eyes.

“Princess, can you save him?” he asked eying the incoming enemies.

“I’m...I think I can,” despite the tears in her eyes, she remained determined.

Silas bit his lip because if something happened to Sakura—the princess of Hoshido—that was on him. Not only would that ruin Hoshido, relationships with Nohr, but he just wouldn’t be able to live with himself if he let something happen to her.

“We don’t have much time!” Silas shouted eyes darting across the land keeping track of familiar faces and making sure none of them are in need. “I can’t hold them all off forever and others may need you as well, Princess.”

Sakura bit her lip and nodded continuing her process. Inwardly, he groaned. This could end very poorly if he wasn’t careful. He had to constantly check to make sure Sakura was okay whilst being attacked himself and sooner or later they would be surrounded and Silas wouldn’t be able to do anything.

They couldn’t risk everything for one knight. It was too risky.

Silas winced as an arrow plunged right in between his armor on his shoulder. He swore under his breath and could hear Sakura’s cries, but he paid them no mind and turned his attention to the source of the attack. It was a pegasus archer. Of course. What he couldn’t reach.

“We have to go,” the knight insisted. “We’ll get surrounded at this rate!”

Sakura released a heavy sigh of defeat. She didn’t want to leave him, but Silas knew that when she came by, it was too late to save him. Sakura stood up, and Silas could see the tired and knowing look in his eyes as he helped the princess onto his horse.

“We’ll win for you. Your life won’t be lost in vain,” Silas murmured and told Sakura not to look back as he rode out of the center of the conflict.

Later, after the battle, Sakura would hold those same tears in her eyes as she tended to his wound in the medical tent, “I could have saved him.”

“Princess Sakura,” Silas sighed softly, “he was too far gone before you got to him. You tried, that’s all that matters.”

A single tear fell down her pale cheek and she blinked rapidly trying to cover it up, “I wasn’t strong enough.”

“Neither was I,” Silas admitted. “I learn that every time we go into one of these battles. But I fight to avenge the ones we lose. I fight to make sure their efforts aren’t in vain and others may live.”

Sakura nodded and wiped her eyes, “You’re right.”

Silas smiled with a gentle expression, “Let’s work hard together, Sakura.”

Her expression brightened and she nodded, “Let us. You’ll-You’ll let me know if you need healing right? E-Elise told me y-you spent the whole night with a nearly broken jaw.” Silas winced and should’ve known that the young princess wouldn’t be able to keep her mouth shut around her newfound friend.

“I will,” Silas nodded. “And it wasn’t that bad, I swear.”

“P-promise you’ll tell me?” Sakura held up her pinky and Silas had to laugh at the innocence of the action.

“Promise,” he wrapped his pinky around hers and wondered if Elise taught her that. It was something she had done to him before as well.

Silas should have anticipated the aggression from the Nohrians when he was on his own. Truthfully, he didn’t know why they pursued him. There was nothing to be talked about. He tried to save their friend, but he was too far gone.

“So you really are a traitor,” they grabbed his collar and Silas tried hard not to lose his temper. That wouldn’t do Corrin any good.

“I tried to help him,” Silas explained. “He was too far gone. He died a valiant death and it won’t be forgotten, but I’m not a traitor.”

And he saw the fist raise, “I’ll believe it when I see—”

“Hello gentlemen,” an almost too pleasant voice came from behind them. He recognized it and was instantly relieved to see the slight smirk trying to force its way onto his face. “Thought you learned your lesson the other night.”

“Get out of here Laslow—”

“I second that,” and Xander towered over them.

The soldiers straightened. All Silas could hear was a string of apologies and begging for what he assumed was mercy. There’s was no doubt in his mind that Silas really could’ve handled the situation on his own, but the last thing he wanted was to cause more trouble.

Laslow pulled Silas off to the side as Xander proceeded to lecture the soldiers. The retainer glanced back at the prince before continuing.

“You seem to have a knack for getting in trouble,” Laslow remarked.

“You’re one to talk,” Silas joked. Laslow smirked and then held a mock look of hurt.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about Silas,” the retainer laughed lightly and then sobered up slightly. “So why have you been getting in these fights, Silas?”

Silas shrugged because he didn’t know why he was the target—or rather he was aware of a reason, but not the logic behind it, “Some people just don’t like me.”

Laslow shook his head, “I find that hard to believe.”

“You’d be surprised,” Silas admitted. “I’m learning the hard way that I’m not particularly liked right now.”

“Well,” Laslow hummed. “Corrin has apparently voiced concerns to Lord Xander about the bruise on your jaw from before.”

“Well, he told me that he was concerned and it really wasn’t that big of a deal,” Silas groaned. “And how do you know that?”

“I’m his retainer,” Laslow replied as if that answered everything. “Either way, you really sparked a conversation between the kingdoms and this whole alliance.”

“Hopefully a good one?”

“A productive one.”

There was nothing more to add to that, but Xander apparently wasn’t done with him. Not that he was accusing him of anything, but it was obvious he was trying to discern why there was hostility towards the young knight. As per usual, Xander had asked him for a spar, that was typically how Silas knew that Xander wanted to talk to him. That was the way Xander could corner him into talking, even if that wasn’t the prince’s intentions. Of course, Silas wouldn’t deny the prince his wishes, and truthfully, Silas had missed their friendly spars. He had occasionally watched Xander and Corrin fight upon Corrin’s request—he had always wanted to talk afterward “like old times”.

But this time it was just him and Xander and Silas wasn’t nearly as frustrated as he was last time. Maybe he should have been considering it was a repeat of last events—but he was feeling particularly calm.

Xander of course noticed it, “You are doing better than the other day—more coordinated. I assume whatever was bothering you has passed?”

“Something like that,” Silas breathed. “I think I’ve just learned how to not let it get under my skin.”

That answer obviously sparked something in Xander and he stopped grooming his horse to look at Silas, “What was it, if I may ask? Rarely did I think anything bothered you to that extent.”

Silas figured most people thought that. He wasn’t considered an angry person, but sometimes he just felt…

Rage for some unknown reason. Pent-up emotions that he supposed he suppressed, but he was never quite aware of the source. Being called a traitor didn’t particularly bother him because he was by Corrin’s side, but sometimes it had just hit him—anger, irritation, a certain ire that he wasn’t sure why certain words made him really consider punching someone. But he had held back, for his sake, Corrin’s, Xander’s, and Nohr.

He’d apparently already given Nohr a bad name though.

“Silas?” Xander asked with concern laced in his voice. “If it upsets you, you needn’t answer. Though, it does worry me that something has bothered you so thoroughly.”

It was touching that Xander was genuinely so concerned for Silas’s well-being. He thought they had lost that connection when he was gone for 10 years.

“Do you think I’m a traitor?” Silas asked quietly, muffled slightly as he redirected his attention to his horse hoping to avoid the piercing and judging gaze of Xander.

Xander remained silent longer than Silas liked and felt like he had overstepped the boundaries by asking that question of the crown prince. Who better to ask if they thought you a traitor than the very person who could banish you once more?

“Is that what you think?” Xander asked after a moment. “Do you think yourself a traitor Silas?”

The younger man could hear the frown in his voice and tried not to wince, “No.”

“Why is that?”

Silas took a deep breath, “I followed Corrin because I felt like he knew what he was trying to do. It was never to hurt Nohr or Hoshido, it was to save both of them. I chose the side I thought would not only protect Nohr but everyone else as well.”

“Are those the words of a traitor?”

Silas spun around at that to really look at Xander and see what he was trying to do. His face was impressively neutral—he shouldn’t be surprised though. It was Xander for gods’ sake.

“They’re my words,” Silas answered carefully.

Xander smiled at that, “There you go. I don’t think you a traitor Silas. In fact, I thank you for believing in Corrin when I did not.”

Silas laughed, it came out bitter, tasted bitter, “Corrin doesn’t even remember me.”

“Yes,” Xander agreed. “I regret that—letting them do that to the both of you, especially you.”

“I disobeyed orders, I—”

“You were a child—eleven Silas. No child deserves to be nearly executed and then banished,” Xander admonished. “I didn’t agree with it then, I don’t agree with it now. Where did you go, Silas? You were missing for eight years and you left so quickly.”

Silas blinked, “I…”

What did happen?

He felt like he was going to throw up. He didn’t remember anything of those eight years. How come? Silas was pretty sure that he—

And then he—

Some woman helped him escape—

Escape what?

What the hell happened to him?

“Silas? Silas, are you all right?” when did Xander get so close to him? Since when did he need Xander to hold him up?

“I—yeah,” he breathed. “I just… I can’t seem to remember what happened. I thought I knew.”

There was confusion and worry marring Xander’s pale face, “Perhaps you took the banishment hard and blocked it out.” He paused, “In truth when I went to look for you, I found you nowhere. I asked your parents and they knew nothing.”

His parents. Even that drew up a blank. Did he go see them before he left? He’s pretty sure he did, but no part of his mind can bring up their interactions.

“It’s odd,” Silas leaned against his horse, pulling away from Xander, “I never really thought about that before. I remember everything before and everything after, but those 8 years in between? There’s nothing.”

And a part of him wanted it to remain as nothing.

“You must be tired,” bless Xander for reading the mood. “Do you want me to walk you back?”

Silas shook his head so fast he felt dizzy—dizzier than he already did, “I’ll be fine, thank you, Lord Xander.”

He nodded, though hesitant, “If you need to talk about anything Silas, I wouldn’t mind lending an ear.”

The younger man would’ve laughed if he didn’t think it so disrespectful, “Thank you milord, but I wouldn’t want to bother you.”

“You aren’t bothering me if I offered,” Xander said simply. “Come, let us return.”

Despite Silas’s earlier protest, Xander did end up walking him back to his quarter, not without Corrin and his ever-watchful eye noticing. The smile on his face was quickly switched with one of grave concern. He began to make his way over to them, but Xander held up a hand and shook his head. Corrin stopped, hesitated, and then simply nodded and Silas made it inside and weakly thanked Xander.

Xander said something about being checked up on by someone later, but Silas fell asleep in the middle of it.

Coldwater rushed all around him. He took a deep breath from the shock and instantly felt the cold water rush down his throat, shoot up his nose. He flailed trying desperately to get back to the surface.

“Drown the brat. Next time he should keep his mouth shut.”

“I thought we were supposed to keep him alive?”

“Then make him fear it.”

“Sir.”

The shock from the cold water left him in a near vegetative state. He shivered and stared blankly at the wall before being dunked again and again and again.

“Please stop!” he woke up shouting and Laslow looked down at him in terror.

“Gods, Silas?!” he shouted alarmed. “Are you okay?”

Silas gripped his shirt, took a deep breath, and nodded.

“Yeah,” he managed.

Laslow stared at him and then left. Silas thought it too simple. He assumed Laslow was there on orders of Lord Xander and maybe Corrin.

Slowly, he ran his hands over his face and released a tremulous breath. What kind of nightmare was that? Silas hated it. It physically hurt like he was the one that was just dunked in that water.

Laslow came back carrying a blanket, “You’re shivering friend.”

“Oh,” was all he could muster.

“Nightmare?” he asked. Before Silas could respond, he added, “If you wish to talk about it, I’m all ears. If not, I respect that too.”

Silas remained silent, not trusting his voice. Laslow took it in strides as he always did.

“Lord Xander requested me to check in on you every now and then,” Laslow confessed as he sat across from Silas. “You seemed a little shaken and he asked me to let him know if you were okay.”

“A little surprised he cares so much,” Silas muttered into the blanket. He was tired.

Laslow didn’t get riled up, “He surprises you a lot.” He winked at Silas. “I’ll go let him know you’ve awoken, but would like time alone.”

“Oh,” Silas’s eyes widened, “Thank you. That would be nice.”

Laslow smirked and left.

True to his word, Silas was left to his own devices for the rest of the day. Laslow came to tell him about dinner and Silas decided he would eat. Corrin luckily didn’t bring up his episode from earlier—he assumed it was based on Xander’s recommendation.

“We’ll be going into battle tomorrow,” Corrin did eventually say. “Will you be feeling up for it?”

“Of course,” he sounded like his old self now.  “Always by your side Corrin.”

Corrin grinned, “Always.”

He caught Xander’s curious gaze, and Silas mouthed a thank you. He simply nodded and resumed his meal conversing easily with Prince Ryoma. Maybe they were getting closer. Leo and Takumi, despite their banter, weren’t trying to kill each other. Camilla and her motherly ways seemed to make Hinoka slightly uncomfortable but they looked friendly. Sakura and Elise had already eased into that friendship with Elise’s optimism and Sakura’s kindness, they were easily the quickest to get along.

Even some of the soldiers were getting along.

They were making progress. They were getting somewhere.

“Everyone has scars. Let’s make sure these aren’t forgotten.”

And things quickly came crashing down.

————————

They made an obvious miscalculation of how dangerous the invisible kingdom—Valla—really was. He knew he shouldn’t have been eavesdropping, but Laslow and Odin sneaking into a room together and then hearing the shattering of glass was an indicator maybe Silas should check in on them.

But hearing the words, “They’ll all die if we don’t do something, Odin!”

Was not what he was anticipating. Then, Selena snuck up on him and Silas immediately felt as if he was in danger. Her eyes bore into him with nothing less than a disapproving annoyance.

“I thought you would be the last one to eavesdrop,” Selena fixed him with a glare.

“I heard something shatter and was going to check in on it,” Silas stood his ground. “I hadn’t intended on eavesdropping.”

Selena huffed, “Right, well, move along then.”

“Does it not bother you that Laslow just shouted how we’ll all die?” Silas raised an eyebrow.

She folded her arms, “Leave.”

Laslow and Odin’s voices immediately stop as if they realized that someone was standing outside of their door. Slowly, a purple eye peeks out of the door and then a blue eye appears just above. Immediately, the door shuts and reopens with Laslow tensely smiling at him.

“Hello Silas,” Laslow greets.

“Silas, what a grand occasion that we meet on this fine night,” Odin pushed past Laslow with his usual energy receiving a complaint from his friend.

“Hi,” he replied with eyes darting from Selena to the other duo. “Is everything okay? I heard something shatter”

Laslow laughed awkwardly, “Ah, yeah, sorry friend. Just a mug slipped out of my hand.”

Silas nodded, “Okay. Well, as long as no one is hurt.” Should he mention the whole “we’ll all die thing” or should he wait until he can get one of them alone?

Particularly Laslow as he didn’t intimidate him and he could understand him.

The look Selena was giving him let him know that he should just go and ask Laslow later. He wondered how much Lord Xander knew about his retainer. These retainers were suspicious despite their kindness.

So Silas bid them good night but failed to get a good night's sleep. Partially because Laslow’s words rang through his mind constantly, and the persisting nightmares. He still wasn’t sure of the source, but it made him miserable and he’s sure he looked just as miserable in the morning.

“Gods, Silas,” Corrin looked at him up and down, hands hovering just before Silas, “You look terrible. Did you even sleep?”

Silas laughed wearily, “It was a bit of a rough night.”

“Do you want to talk about it?” Corrin asked softly placing a gentle hand on his bicep. “Is everything okay?”

“Yeah,” Silas smiled trying to reassure Corrin. “Just a few odd dreams.” That he didn’t know how to explain because he didn’t know what they were or what was happening.

Corrin stared at him for a while judging him, trying to tell if Silas was lying. Silas would forever be grateful for Corrin accepting him despite the memories, but at that moment, he didn’t need this. Corrin squeezed his arm gently and gave a small smile.

“Okay,” he said. “Well, if you need anything let me know. You need people to listen to you too. You can’t shoulder everyone’s problems and not talk to others yourself.”

“I—thank you, Corrin,” he didn’t know why he was shocked at his concern, but maybe it was because he never really expected anyone to listen to his own problems. He didn’t really want to burden others, especially not Corrin.

So he remained silent and let Corrin go about his day and tried to seek out Laslow. However, every time he saw Laslow, he was either doing something for Lord Xander or with either Odin or Selena. It was shocking that he hadn’t caught him flirting yet, but he supposes that this has been stressful enough for him to know he shouldn’t do that now.

And then they were marching again before Silas even had the chance to ask Laslow what he meant. At that point, he feared it was too late to ask, but he managed to move up through the marching order to ride up beside Laslow who was following closely to Xander.

Laslow, to his surprise, didn’t seem alarmed by his appearance, “Greetings, Silas.”

“Hey Laslow,” Silas wondered if he wasn’t alarmed by his appearance because he didn’t think Silas would broach the subject near Xander.

He was wrong.

“About last night,” Silas began. “What did you mean?”

“About what?” Laslow’s face contorted into puzzlement.

“About us all dying?” Silas whispered because he couldn’t tell if Xander or anyone else was listening.

“You heard that?” Laslow gasped. Oh. He wasn’t even aware that Silas was listening in. “You shouldn’t eavesdrop!”

Silas shrugged, “What did it mean?”

Laslow opened his mouth to respond but was promptly cut off by the sound of someone shouting. A battle was incoming. Their conversation would have to wait. Silas could say that he was proud of the fact that so many of the soldiers were actively working together. It was no longer just Nohr and Nohr but Nohrians and Hoshidans working together. It wasn’t the whole army—he figured there would always be people who wouldn’t be able to work alongside each other, but it was enough that it made a difference.

Despite that, it didn’t seem like they were beating these Vallite soldiers any faster. In fact, they seemed to double every time one was struck down. They were faster, they were stronger and Silas stuck closely to Corrin watching his back as he watched his. This fight was a blur. There was so much blood everywhere whether it was his own or one of his fallen comrades, it made no difference—Silas just felt sick. He got lost in the violence because if he let his guard down he could die. Corrin looked exhausted and worn, but he kept going through with it.

They could never be fully prepared for these invisible soldiers if they kept growing at an exponential rate and they were falling faster and running low on energy. It wasn’t long before Xander ran up beside them calling out for Corrin.

“Corrin! We have to fall back!” Xander shouted over the screaming. Silas was grateful that he showed up because Corrin and he was being pushed back. “We need to regroup.”

“Okay!” Corrin gritted his teeth as he pulled his sword out of a soldier. Silas could see the grimace on his face. “You’re right! I’ll do the best I can, Silas spread the message!”

And Corrin was gone before Silas could even say anything.

“Corrin!”

“Silas,” Xander called. “Come along, it’s getting dangerous here.” Silas glanced back at where Corrin went briefly before nodding and following Xander as they cut down whatever was in their path. Xander regrouped with Laslow, and Silas couldn’t help but stare Laslow down. He knew something, but he wasn’t saying anything. Laslow caught his gaze but said nothing as he disappeared into the mess.

“Silas,” Xander sounded impatient. “No spacing out, we have to make a retreat.”

“Right, sorry milord,” he sounded like he had just been scolded by his parents, but he tried to shrug that off. The knight followed Xander’s instruction ignoring how many of his comrades had fallen—the count has to be immense, this was a terrible battle and they were caught terribly unprepared in a way Silas didn’t expect. He didn’t think anyone expected such a catastrophe.

The camp was miserable. The med tents were overwhelmed. Both Sakura and Elise were running around frantic. People were flying in and out of the tents. Irrepressible anger and defeat radiated in the air and everyone looked worn. Silas couldn’t count the number of people who saw him and just broke down, all he could do was give them a pat on the back and try to convince them that things would get better. Whether they believed it or not mattered little because they still smiled and thanked him before leaving.

“You carry a heavy burden on your shoulders,” Laslow appeared behind him. Before Silas could open his mouth to say something, Laslow held up his hand, “I know what you’re going to say—it’s about last night right?” Silas nodded, “It’s complicated. It’s hard to explain what Odin and I know.”

Silas mentally noted that he didn’t include Selena. Maybe it was a cover-up?

“Well, better start,” Silas took a seat. “I have time.”

“Very little, it would seem,” Laslow cocked his head to the side. “I notice how soldiers have nonstop come to you about their troubles.”

Inwardly he groaned, but he allowed himself a smile, “I like to be there for people.”

“For whose sakes? Their’s or Corrin’s?” how observant was Laslow?

“I do it for whoever needs it,” it was a half-assed answer, but it was true to an extent.

Laslow let it go, “We’re fighting a war that’s beyond us. I don’t even think Azura is fully aware of the scale.”

Silas furrowed his brows confused by the ambiguity, “You’ll have to explain further Laslow. She told us that the Vallite soldiers were dangerous from the get-go.” Though, he did have to admit that she hadn’t told them that they could get so strong.

Laslow picked up on it and stared at Silas straight in the eyes oddly unemotional for him, “Are you telling me that you were fully prepared for the numbers to double as one went down? Were you aware of how much stronger they got the further we went?” There was a pause before he blinked and resumed his normal disposition, “We’re in a dangerous predicament Silas and a change has to be made.”

A deeper frown formed on Silas’s face, “Why aren’t you telling this to Corrin or Lord Xander?”

With a small wink and a mischievous grin that had cracks in it bloomed onto his face, “You’re the one who was eavesdropping,” despite the jest in the statement Silas could see that he was exhausted, “I, uh... I’m planning on telling him tonight. I intended on telling him last night, but… he was busy discussing things with Lord Ryoma.”

“So late into the night?” Silas arched an eyebrow at that. “You’re a night owl.”

“I am,” he agreed. “But when I returned to him, he had already retired for the night and we were marching before we knew it.”

It was a weak argument, but he couldn’t tell what else had stopped him from telling Xander about it. He figured maybe it had something to do with his past that was an ever prevalent mystery.

“Well… just tell him,” Silas felt like he was pleading. “Kind of important.”

Laslow laughed, “That’s an understatement.” Before Silas could argue with him, he smiled somberly, “Don’t push yourself too hard.”

And he fled just as quietly as he entered, ever light on his feet. He was truly a dancer if what the rumors said were true. He had never caught him in the act, apparently, he did it in the dead of the night.

As he exited the tent, Silas was reminded once again about just how bad the fight was. This was a loss. They got hit hard and it was ruining morale. He couldn’t fix everyone and he knew the clerics were growing tired and they were low on supplies.

As he passed Corrin’s tent he heard the muffled sounds of his distress. Silas’s heart clenched and he was about to enter when he heard another familiar voice.

“You are not at fault,” it sounded like Ryoma. “Corrin, you couldn’t have known—none of us could have.” There was a soft sound from Corrin and Silas realized he had been crying. Why hadn’t he called him? “Corrin,” Ryoma’s voice softened. “Corrin, please look at me…”

“But Ryoma,” he stuttered.

“ Corrin,” his voice firmer, “you can’t blame yourself for this. We will be better prepared next time, but this isn’t on you. Trust me, no one blames you.” He took a deep breath, “Prince Xander and I blame ourselves for this. This is a lot for one person and we’re trying hard to work together and encourage the soldiers to as well.”

“But it’s not…”

Silas shook his head and decided to walk away. It wouldn’t do him any good to just hover around and listen in. If Corrin ever wanted to talk to him about it then he could. The knight went about his day, checking in on the clerics if they needed any help and gathering more supplies for them. He made errands to get more staves, but supplies were low and they wouldn’t be able to go to battle like that—it’d be suicide. There was no hiding how useless Silas in fact felt. There were so many people down and injured that Silas just felt nauseous. There was so much to do, but so little time.

Seeing everything made Silas realize what they were really getting themselves into and he wonder if this much blood would have been shed if they kept the battle between Hoshido and Nohr. There was no love for this war—but he didn’t think it would get that bad. He noticed soldiers looking like they wanted to defect and the only thing keeping them there was their love for the royal family.

He wiped the sweat off of his brow.

Grey.

The world seemed extremely grey for whatever odd reason. Even when he eventually found his body sitting in front of the table with bright lights and people laughing despite the obvious ache they had, it all seemed very grey.

Probably because it was all superficial and Silas could see that well.

“I’m a night owl, but I do get sleep Silas, thank you very much,” Laslow whined when Silas caught him after dinner.

Silas snickered, “I’ll believe it when I see it.”

“Oh, so you want to watch me sleep now, eh?” Silas’s eyes widened in offense at Laslow’s words as he winked.

“Why would I want to do that?” Silas rolled his eyes. “Why would anyone?”

Laslow gasped in mock offense, “How dare you? Do you think I’m not attractive in my sleep? I promise I don’t snore.”

“Well, that’s one perk,” Silas sighed.

Silas fell silent after that and just walked beside Laslow.

“I told Lord Xander,” Laslow updated him eventually when he noticed Silas’s change in mood. Then he paused as he stared Silas up and down, “You’re working yourself into the ground friend.”

Silas gave a light smirk, “Appreciate the concern, but don’t try to change the topic.”

Laslow laughed and it wasn’t as forced as the one from before, “Alright, alright. He said he’ll tell Prince Ryoma and have a conference with everyone plus Azura to see if she knows anything.”

“Wait, what exactly did you tell them?” Silas asked. “Because if it’s what you told me, that’s not much to go off of.”

Laslow waved him off, “Come to the war council meeting tomorrow and you’ll figure it out. I’m too tired to re-explain everything.”

Begrudgingly, he acquiesced, “Well, thanks for the chat and...update.”

“You looked like you could use a distraction.”

That was true.

“Also,” Laslow stopped Silas. “I know you’re trying to be considerate, but if you collapse in the middle of the battlefield you’ll be of no help.”

Silas looked at him in puzzlement, “What are you talking about?”

Laslow pointed to Silas’s shoulder, “You were favoring your right arm today when you were sparring.”

“You noticed?” Silas asked shocked.

“I notice a lot of things,” Laslow looked past Silas, “Get it checked out before more people notice.”

The knight turned around to see what he was looking at. Then he noticed Prince Xander and Prince Ryoma talking to one another. They looked surprisingly less stressed than Silas thought they would.

“Do you want me to at least wrap it for you if you won’t go to the medical tent?” Laslow asked with a sympathetic smile.

Silas chuckled awkwardly as he drew his eyes away from the duo, “I can do it myself, no worries.”

Laslow only shook his head and dragged Silas away.

Silas thanked him when he was done because it did feel a lot better. With a “take care”, Laslow sent Silas on his way because apparently, Laslow had duties to take care of. Silas figured that meant dancing into the dead of the night but decided to leave it be.

————————

“What do you mean there’s a bigger threat than Anankos?” Azura looked severely perplexed and more than a little concerned.

“And how would you know this?” Takumi asked.

Silas didn’t miss how Odin and Selena were letting Laslow do all the talking despite how frequently he looked at the others for guidance. Perhaps he had a special connection with the two of them that let them communicate without words because the number of shared looks he had seen were outrageous.

“That’s not to say that Anankos isn’t the reason that we have a threat bigger than him,” Laslow glazed over Takumi’s other question as if he hadn’t asked it.  “Anankos has had a lot of time to build up power, to build up more defenses and we’ll have to watch our backs.” Laslow looked everyone over for a second, “Anankos could be anywhere in truth.”

“Do you think he’s read our movements because of that?” Leo asked. “Is that why the last battle went so…abysmally?”

“Possibly,” Laslow shrugged. “That and a combination of just the fact that the army is getting stronger than we can keep up with.”

Odin finally spoke up, “We just can’t go head first into battles as we have.” It was rare that Odin spoke plainly and that’s how everyone knew that this had to be taken seriously. “Not that we haven’t planned before, but now we have to.”

“We can’t predict their movements though,” Takumi huffed. “We practically don’t see them until they’re right on top of us.”

“We’ll have to work around that,” Selena said plainly.

“ How ?” Leo looked irritated.

Xander sighed, “They may not know, but the information is valuable nonetheless.”

“We don’t even know the threat,” Hinoka commented. “They said something bigger, but not what.”

“What we do know,” Laslow looked to Hinoka, “is that sometimes faces of the past may show up.”

“What does that—”

“As I said, Anankos has eyes everywhere,” Laslow continued an oddly empty expression on his face. “Where it be Vallite soldiers lingering where we can’t see them, or another matter entirely. He knows our weak points. Some more obvious than others, he has no problems with playing dirty.”

Hinoka scowled, “This is very vague.”

“But enlightening nonetheless. They’ve given what they can, Hinoka,” Ryoma said patiently, but he was frowning intensely. “We have to work with that. Corrin?”

Corrin nodded at the trio, “Thank you for the help you three. If you know anything else, please tell us.”

Laslow bowed slightly, “Of course.”

Silas simply stared, confused because he didn’t think that clarified much more than what he had heard before. Yet, it was enough for them to have to put their next moves into action—whatever that was.

“Silas,” Xander called out to him. Silas stopped, shocked that he was being called upon by Xander. “Are you well?”

“Uh, yes sir,” he replied nervously.

Xander chuckled, “You’re not in trouble. I just recalled Laslow mentioning an injury.”

“Ah, haha,” Silas nodded. “It’s much better, thank you for the concern.”

“Of course,” then the topic abruptly shifted. “What do you think of everything Silas?”

Silas laughed, “If only I knew. I don’t know what we’re even fighting anymore.”

Xander smirked, “Frank.” Silas blushed a little at that. “I agree though, I don’t know either. However Laslow, Odin, and Selena know that information is beyond me, but regardless, we have to thank them for telling us.”

Silas frowned, “It’s kind of concerning that they know so much and we don’t know how.”

Xander remained silent for a while as they continued to walk. Silas vaguely noticed that they were heading to Xander’s quarters. He supposed that he didn’t feel like sparring today after yesterday’s battle. The knight couldn’t blame him.

“Perhaps,” Xander admitted. “But I trust him with my life. He has yet to do anything to make me doubt that despite not knowing much about him.”

“I trust him too, I suppose,” Silas confessed. “I just can’t help but wonder if maybe he had gotten himself involved in something that else and it’s too dangerous for him to reveal the true secrets, you know?”

Xander’s face remained carefully neutral, “I hope that he will tell me if that was the case. Speaking of which, Silas, what did you think about Laslow’s final statement—about Anankos being everywhere?”

So that bothered him too? “At first, I thought maybe he was talking about Anankos having eyes everywhere because this is his domain, but now… Now I’m wondering if he was referring to a traitor.”

“You too?”

“You thought the same?” Silas almost sighed in relief that he wasn’t the only one. “I want to believe that’s not possible, but still… I don’t know anything anymore. We’ve gotten stabbed in the back a few times. Not to put a bad name to Corrin’s trust, but…”

“I know,” Xander opened the door. “I know.” Silas hovered awkwardly outside simply peeking in afraid of crossing a boundary despite the obvious invitation. Xander looked back at him expectantly. “Well, don’t stand there all day. Come in.”

Uncertain, he walked in. He wasn’t sure what this was. It was odd to be invited into Xander’s quarters. This was something he might’ve done as a kid if Xander didn’t mind. But they were grown now and Xander had a status to uphold.

“Come, take a seat Silas, I have tea,” Xander was oddly casually. He took off his armor and it was a rare sight for Silas.

Slowly, he sat, taking the tea with consideration, “Lord Xander, if I may?”

“Certainly, what is it?”

“Why have you invited me here?” Silas took a long sip from the tea and it reminded him of his childhood.

Xander smiled as he stirred his tea, “I simply wanted to speak to you Silas. It’s been a long time since we’ve really had a conversation.”

Silas tried to hide his shock, “Really?”

This time, the crown prince laughed, “Is it so shocking? You’re an old friend Silas, yet I feel like I don’t know you anymore.”

“Oh,” that made him pause. “You said I changed… how so? In a good way or a bad way?”

Clearing his throat, Xander took a moment to seemingly gather his thoughts, “When I said that Silas, I was thinking back to the young child that used to run freely around with Corrin in the Northern Fortress and when we used to talk back then, and I look at you now… well as war does, that innocence is gone.” Silas’s breath caught, “A part of me wondered what those eight years being banished did to you, and I worry about that at times. When I saw you as a castle knight once again, I questioned whether you were still the same Silas I knew or if you had changed drastically.”

“And?”

“You’re still the same,” Xander smiled, but it seemed melancholy, “though, like Corrin, you bear a burden on your shoulders you shouldn’t for someone so young.”

Silas laughed at that, relief flooding him. He didn’t know why it concerned him so much about what Xander thought about him. It might’ve when they were younger, but so much time had passed, it shouldn’t have mattered.

“I feel like I’ve aged fifty years with this war, milord,” Silas admitted.

Xander's smile brightened, “I think we all do. Let us be honest, this is more than all of us bargained for.”

Calming his laughter, Silas spoke in a small voice, “I’m glad I didn’t disappoint…”  

“You couldn’t really,” Xander supplied staring straight at Silas. “Perhaps it would be better if you didn’t work yourself into the ground, but, regardless, you’re still the same boy from before with those ridiculous cowlicks.”

“X-Xander!” Silas stammered. “They’re—I can’t help them.” Then, he noticed the slip in titles and felt a panic flow into him, but the prince quickly waved it off.

“We’re friends, Silas,” he said calmly. “Don’t worry.” Silas nodded slowly because it didn’t feel like he should be allowed to. It didn’t feel right to cross that boundary. “But you’re still the same, Silas.”

“Well, that’s a relief,” Silas confessed.

Xander looked up from his cup, “I didn’t realize that was such a concern of yours.”

Releasing a long sigh, Silas set his cup down, “I guess it stemmed from Corrin not recognizing me. A part of me wondered if any of you did—if I was even the same person that you used to be friends with.”

“None of us forgot about you Silas. I never did,” Xander began. “In truth, when you were banished, I went to look for you, but I couldn’t find you. As I said earlier, your parents didn’t even know where you went.”

“They—” Silas’s breath hitched. “I guess I left so quickly…” But Silas didn’t remember what happened. If Xander went to his parents, but they didn’t know where he was, where did he go?

“I’m just glad you’re okay,” Xander concluded remembering the events from the previous time they discussed this.

Silas let the conversation carry on from there. Whether there were silences or if they were fully engaged in one odd conversation or another, it was refreshing. A change of pace that Silas needed and he felt Xander most definitely needed.

Corrin eventually stopped by as he noticed their absence. It was like old times and Silas relished in it. Corrin was feeling a lot better about everything and that made things not seem so bad at that moment.

Silas wondered what made Xander want to relax so much. It was out of character for him to spend so much time without bothering to do work. Eventually, of course, he did begin pulling out his paperwork, but his multitasking skills were incredible and for a few moments, Silas envied him. That diligence to do paperwork when they weren’t even near Nohr made Silas cringe, but a part of him assumed it was therapeutic for Xander.

It made him go back to a normal routine where they weren’t worried about invisible soldiers jumping them.

Silas really missed his old life at times.