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There’s a wetness to his breathing. Atsushi can hear it even in his own ears, can feel the way it rattles in his lungs as his chest contracts around the shard of stone impaling him. It hurts, with each and every breath, in some distant sort of way. There’s a copper tang on his tongue, in his nose, spreading on the floor in his lopsided line of vision.
”I’m dying…”
It’s a far away thought, muffled under the cotton of exhaustion that clings to his brain. He’s dying but not fast enough for his regenerative powers. Atsushi recognizes that his ability is keeping him alive in the way the pain goes sharp then dull then sharp like it’s trying to remind him that he’s alive.
Stupid, stupid boy. Running off after the perpetrator, getting separated from Dazai, falling into the trap of maze-like paths in this temple, all were the actions of a stupid kid. Him. Finding the Rebirth cultists had been easy, dealing with their strange gifts wasn’t. As evidence by the stone in his chest.
A low moan escaped him as a particularly ragged breath aggravated the wound, sending pain all too clearly for a moment before fading. He should pull the shard out ran through his mind again. But he was so tired, he couldn’t pick his hand up to do so. He could barely move his gaze from the strange circle etched on the ground.
There are places where the Veil between this world and the next are thin.
So strange… He could almost feel a thrumming in the air. Like a plane before take off. Maybe… maybe that was because he was dying… The sensation of his soul leaving his body… A whimper left him, fear creeping in as he watched blood, his blood, pool into the edges of the circle.
Places where Spirits of the Lost might step through.
’I don’t want to die…!’ The thought screamed inside him as Atsushi started trembling. Pants left his lips, fingers clawing at the ground beneath him as hot tears ran down his cheeks. “I don’t… I don’t want to die… Someone… help... Someone, please… Please… Dazai-!”
“Oi.”
Purple-gold eyes snapped open as fingers touched his hair, solid and warm. Atsushi finally found the strength to lift his head to stare.
Fire. The man was crowned in fire; the light of the setting sun from one of the broken windows turning his red hair ablaze, casting an unearthly glow in his blue eyes. Atsushi waited for fear to come at the sight of this being, this man of light and flames. But as the man knelt more to his level, fingers brushing through white strands, Atsushi felt only calm reassurance radiate through him.
“You’re Dazai’s subordinate?” The man asked, tone calm and soothing. Atsushi could have sobbed in relief; maybe he did if the broken noise that came from him was anything. A quiet ‘easy now, it’s okay’ came from the stranger as he looked him over, a frown tugging at his lips before he nodded to himself.
Burning blue eyes locked with his, “You’re doing well, Atsushi. Just hang on a little longer.”
The man made to rise, clearly intent on leaving. Fear rose again, driving him to reach up for the man, catching his brown coat. (Weirdly familiar but not) “W-wait.. Please don’t…” The word strained out, hoarse and raw as Atsushi felt tears gather in his eyes again. I don’t want to die alone…
He couldn’t meet the man’s gaze anymore, only sense the sadness rolling off him as he shifted, gathering the young man in his arms. Atsushi leaned into the hold, choking on his own blood and sobs, clinging for all his worth. A low hum rumbled in the man’s chest, a hand stroking down his back, not even caring for the blood that was no doubt soaking him and his coat.
“Hush, hush now. I’m going to get him and then I’ll be right back. You’re dying but you’re not there yet.” He assured, pulling away to offer a calm smile and cupping his face, “It’ll be okay.” A promise sealed with a gentle kiss to the forehead. Atsushi let his eyes close, feeling gentle arms lay him down and then nothing.
He wasn’t sure how much time passed between the man leaving and coming back. He only knew that one moment he was alone, the next there was a gentle hand on his shoulder shaking him once. “Wake up, Atsushi. He’ll be here in a moment.”
Dully, he forced his eyes open, blinking slowly as things refused to focus for a moment before clearing. The man was kneeling over him, that smile in place and he… couldn’t help but twitch his lips up to make. “Thank… you…”
He was so tired, everything hurt in a distant way, but at least the man’s touch was gentle and soothing, keeping the fear away with ease. This wouldn’t be such a bad way to go, he thought. But there was still one question lingering in the back of his mind...
“Why?”
The smile shifted slightly, calm still but sadder. The man pulled his hand from silver locks (when had he started touching them again?) as he breathe words into the still air between them. Duel colored eyes widened, bloodied mouth opening to comment as a different voice rang out.
”Odasaku?!” Dazai. Frantic.
"Odasaku, where-?! ATSUSHI!" Ah, there was fear too.
Atsushi blinked, the fire-crowned man stepping back as bandaged arm reached out, new voices joining Dazai’s in their high panic frenzy. But he couldn’t make them out, the words turning into a muffled sea of noise as his vision slanted, the fire fading out as darkness claimed him. The man’s last word alone drumming in his mind.
I don’t want him to go through that pain again.