Archive of Our Own

Chapter Text

Track One: Manic Depression

There’s a sense of sadistic beauty in destruction that Yoongi has never understood, but always appreciated.

He’d watched the replays of Hendrix setting his Fender Stratocaster on fire and smashing it against the stage in a state of horrified awe, being aware that a year’s worth of his rent was being obliterated against the floor with no sense of remorse. But it was almost mesmerising to witness, even through the glass of the TV. It was obvious why it became the ultimate power-move in the 70s and 80s rock scene: destroying the very thing that made you powerful to begin with. However, in 1996 when Yoongi trips over a lead and shatters his bass against an amp, it’s not glorious; it’s nothing but fucking tragic.

Yoongi sits at the back of the bar with a drained beer bottle in one hand and the other pressing a tissue against his split lip from where he also fell against the amp, watching his own band play without him.

‘You alright, bud?’ Hoseok appears next to Yoongi and hands him a beer and places the other hand on Yoongi’s shoulder. Yoongi removes the now-bloodstained tissue, and takes a large gulp. The alcohol gets into the cut and it stings a little, so Yoongi presses the scrunched up toilet roll back against his lip. The music is really loud. Is it always this loud on this side of the stage? Taehyung gives Yoongi a slight wave as he sings.

‘Yeah, I‘m fine, I guess.’

‘Okay, good. Because now I know you’re not dying, I wanted to tell you that that was the most beautiful thing I’ve ever witnessed. Nothing brings me more joy than watching you stack it.’

Yoongi hits the hand off his shoulder. ‘Fuck you, Hobi.’ He tries to spit the words out, but the tissue muffles them too much for them to sound threatening. ‘You obviously must have done the setup wrong. Taehyung’s cord was a health and safety hazard and my almost-death would have been on your head.’

‘No, you’re just a mess of a human being. That cord was secured tightly after Taehyung’s accidental lasso incident last month. You just got cocky with your movements.’

Yoongi can’t find it in himself to do as he normally would and argue to the death even though he’s fully aware he’s wrong. Instead he just ignores Hoseok and turns his attention back to his band. Over the past couple of years, he’d come to think both he and his bass line were the things that kept the group grounded. But now, as Namjoon covers the bass line on his normal guitar, Yoongi feels like he’s looking at a reality without him and he doesn’t like how ordinary it looks. Jungkook grins at him from behind his drum kit and Yoongi tries to return it, but it irritates the cut. Instead he just watches and feels the fear start to bubble in the pit of his stomach. This isn’t the end, he thinks as a way to quell it, I’ll be back soon, I can get her fixed.

‘Some things just can’t be fixed, Yoongi,’ Namjoon says as he places the paper bags on the scratched dining table. Taehyung and Jungkook lurch towards the food immediately, but start to retract slowly under Namjoon’s glare. ‘I know it meant a lot to you—’

‘That “it” is a “she”. Respect the dead.’

Taehyung leans across the table towards Yoongi and holds his hand. ‘Do you want me to light some candles? Say a few words?’ Yoongi stares at him for a few seconds before shaking Taehyung’s hand off and dropping his head onto the table.

The front door clicks open. ‘Hey, sorry I’m late! I had to work on a research study and—’ Jimin stops in the living room doorway and gestures at the table.

‘What the fuck is this?’

‘Dinner,’ Namjoon says as he starts to open one of the paper McDonald’s bags. ‘Yoongi is “too depressed” to cook.’

‘I wasn’t referring to that.’ Jimin runs his hands through his hair, eyes narrowed. ‘I was referring to…’ Jimin takes in the broken bass guitar on the table as Namjoon places Big Mac boxes around its body and Taehyung places lit tea lights up the snapped neck. ‘I’m referring to the mortuary slab Yoongi’s dead bass is placed on.’

‘I already said: dinner.’

‘It’s a goddamn wake,’ Yoongi mutters into the Ikea table below his face.

Jimin shakes his head in disbelief before he drops his bag and pushes an extra chair in between Taehyung and Jungkook. He places a kiss on Taehyung’s cheek as he settles down. ‘Is Hoseok coming?’

‘Work,’ Taehyung says as he dangles a fry over his mouth and lowers it in. ‘But I said we’d swing by Wetherspoons later to say hi.’

‘Yes please. We did another study on mice today and I need a glass of wine to forget the amount of feces I had to deal with.’ Jimin adjusts himself on the chair, the padding gone flat with years of use, and takes one of the boxes. ‘What even happened?’

Namjoon sighs. ‘We took Yoongi’s bass into that guitar place in town where we took Tae’s after the lasso incident, but the guy at the shop said it was beyond repair.’

‘He also said it wasn’t even worth fixing,’ Jungkook says through a mouthful of fries. ‘He said that fishing line nailed onto a plank of wood would make a better guitar.’

‘Can’t you just buy a new bass?’ Taehyung picks the tomato out of his burger and balances it on the bun of Jungkook’s.

‘Can’t afford it.’ Yoongi voice is muted against the table.

‘Well can you find a way for us to start playing again?’ Taehyung bounces in his seat. ‘It’s only been a week with no practice and I’m finding myself restless.’ Jimin rests a hand on his shoulder and he calms. Then he takes the lettuce of his burger and puts it in Jimin’s box.

‘Oh, he’s been a pain in the arse,’ Jimin remarks before throwing the lettuce at Taehyung’s head. ‘3am last night, shaking me awake wanting to go for a walk to watch the stars or some bullshit.’

‘And I’m assuming you told him to fuck off,’ Namjoon says, busying himself dividing the fries Jungkook has let live between the five of them.

‘Yeah of course I did,’ Jimin picks up his burger and lifts it to his mouth. ‘As I did up my shoelaces,’ he mumbles as he takes a bite.

Yoongi finally lifts his head and notices his breath has left condensation on the table’s plastic covering. ‘I can’t just buy a new one. Namjoon and I are barely covering rent as it is, and then we’re somehow paying to feed you three even though you have your own place. So I can’t just splurge money on a bass. Not one worth playing, anyway.’

‘A bad workman blames his tools,’ Namjoon says and takes a bite of a mozzarella stick.

‘You’re a tool.’ Yoongi sighs and starts dragging a fry through the pile of ketchup in the lid of his burger box. ‘It’s just got me thinking… I love our shitty band. But I’m twenty-five, for fuck’s sake. I’m twenty-five and I have no steady income or plan for my future. Seeing the price tags on those basses in the shop, I’ve realised that I can’t justify devoting this much time to music if it’s not bringing in any money.’

‘What are you saying?’ Jungkook says through a mouthful of burger.

‘I’m saying that either we start making actual money, or I’m gonna have to quit so I can focus on getting some kind of career. And you should probably think about that too.’

Jungkook huffs and goes to say something, but Namjoon moves the conversation on before he can retaliate. ‘Look I want to make money from this as much as you do. But, we’re fighting at least 20 local bands in even this shitty little city. And, yeah, although Bulletproof Boys being openly queer makes us stand out a little, it also loses us some gigs.’

‘Which is exactly my point! Exactly. I love our group, but...’ Yoongi has given up on his food after four fries and a small bite of his burger. He pushes it across the table to Jungkook. ‘I’ve tried so many different chord progressions, unusual lyrics… We’ve gone for posters and stickers on lampposts or whatever edgy shit musicians do nowadays. But no matter how hard we work or how many hours we dedicate to it, we’re not getting anywhere.’

‘When you put it like that, it doesn’t sound good for you guys,’ Jimin comments. ‘I might be able to find you gigs around the uni? But I’m not in the performing arts block as much as I was during undergrad.’

Everyone remains silent as they focus on their food instead of the deep tension in the air.

‘What about jazz?’ Taehyung says and all the others can do is stare at him.

When he doesn’t offer any explanation, Namjoon takes one for the team and asks: ‘yes, what about jazz?’

‘Just… Erm…’ Taehyung waves his hands around each other, as if they will manifest the words he’s trying to find. ‘I’m not sure how to word it… But the way jazz works and how it doesn’t sound like other music.’

‘Of course it doesn’t. It’s a separate genre, Taehyung.’ Yoongi’s that his voice sounds frustrated, even though it’s not intended to be.

‘I mean more it’s like… Sway-y and the notes aren’t straight—’

‘Same,’ Jimin pipes in.

‘—and they make the music up as they go. Every song sounds different each time it's played.’

‘Oh!’ Namjoon leans over the table towards Taehyung. ‘You mean like… Jazz works with improvisation and swing rhythms. It even has its own scales.’

‘Different scales?’ Jungkook grabs a handful of Taehyung’s chips and shoves them in his mouth. As if Yoongi didn’t get him two burgers already.

‘Yeah. Jazz scales are different to normal ones. I can’t remember how and probably wouldn’t understand it even if I knew, but they’re the scales musicians will improvise in and what gives it its different sound.’ He adjusts his beanie, as if it will somehow align the thoughts in his head. ‘But I don’t know how jazz will help us, as great as it sounds.’

‘Sound, Namjoon. That’s my point.’ Taehyung says it confidently, but then recedes under everyone’s expectant gazes. He takes a deep breath. ‘Everyone has guitars, drums, maybe keys. But what if we… Jazz it up a little?’

They all take Taehyung in. Sometimes he will come out with random ideas like writing a song about how giraffes can be gay or that they should dress up as renaissance paintings for Halloween and they’re either strokes of genius, or end up with Yoongi having to call both the police and the fire brigade as Namjoon tries to extinguish a very much on fire Jungkook dressed as the Mona Lisa.

‘What are you thinking, Tae? I can see the cogs working from here.’ Jimin leans over to pet Taehyung’s hair, making it sway around his jawline.

‘Hey, Kooks.’ Taehyung’s hair is now sticking up in several places as he leans over Jimin to grin at Jungkook. ‘What about your brother?’

‘Oh..’ Jungkook puts Yoongi’s burger down on the table and picks at the sesame seeds. ‘I uhh, haven’t seen him in a while... What about him?’

Taehyung grins. ‘Jazz, Jeon Jungkook.’ He spreads his hands out. ‘Jazz.’

‘Why do you suddenly want more hours? You’re already full time and I thought you wanted time to focus on your music.’  Hoseok pours shots of vodka into two glasses and tops them up with cranberry juice.

‘Yes, Hoseok, I did.’ Yoongi holds a tray of dirty glasses in one hand, leans against the counter with the other. ‘But that was before the only thing that gives me any semblance of joy broke.’ Yoongi follows Hoseok round the bar as he places the drinks in front of two women. Hoseok gives them a wry smile and they start giggling.

His smile drops as he turns back to Yoongi. ‘Honestly, sometimes I regret giving you this job.’

Yoongi places the tray on the bar and the glasses threaten to topple onto the counter ‘Why? I work harder than anyone else.’

‘That’s exactly my reason. You ignore your health by heaping responsibility on yourself.’

‘Hoseok, I need those hours.’ Yoongi watches as a member of staff climbs onto a kick stool and strains to reach glasses on the top shelf. He gestures towards her. ‘Irene’s leaving in a few months, why don’t you promote me to supervisor? I’m basically doing that kinda work anyway.’

Irene gives a short laugh as she hops down from the stool with two wine glasses in her hand. ‘Yoongi, darling, if you get promoted in this place, you’ll never leave. Ask Hoseok. Has a degree, but has to dedicate his entire life to this place.’ She nods at Hoseok as she starts to pour rose into the glasses. ‘I’m only leaving to go to another location.’

‘Yeah, exactly. Music technician jobs are too unpredictable to live off of. Had to give up teaching dance because I got offered the promotion at this shit hole and it pays a lot better. Sorry for my language,’ he aims the last part at the two ladies sipping their vodka cranberries. The straw slips from one of their mouths. Hoseok places a hand on both of Yoongi’s shoulders and looks down at him. ‘I’ll give you five more hours a week, but that’s it. I know what you’re like, and that’s a human disaster.’

Yoongi goes to argue that he’s only a mild wreck of a human, but the doors swing open and raucous laughter fills the pub. He looks at his watch and sees 5:34pm flashing at him. Friday Crappy Hour, as Irene calls it. Three men in business suits stride in, joking about something that Yoongi assumes is either racist or misogynistic. He vaguely recognises them, but they all wear suits in different shades of brown, different styles of paisley on their ties. After a point, they all look the same.

‘God, Eileen, I swear you get hotter every time I see you.’ One of them says as he leers at Irene over the bar.

Irene doesn’t look up as she gathers pint glasses. ‘Do you want your usual, Adam?’

‘It’s Alex.’

She looks up at him them, with a smile that’s so sickly sweet, it makes Yoongi grin. ‘Sorry, Andy.’

Alex laughs and leans against the counter. ‘God, you drive me absolutely mad.’ He peers over the bar and looks down. ‘Especially in that skirt.’

Irene keeps the smile on her face and Yoongi wonders how Alex can’t feel how acidic it is. But she still adjusts her skirt so it sits slightly lower. The tension in Irene’s shoulders doesn’t suit her. She avoids Alex’s predatory gaze as she pulls one of the pints. Yoongi walks over to her side.

‘Irene, can you go on your break?’

Yoongi feels her relax against his arm. ‘My saviour,’ she whispers as she nudges him and hurries into the back.

‘Alright, Anton, you want all three the same?’

Alex watches Irene walk away, eyes trained low, then looks at Yoongi with a frown. ‘When will she be back?’

‘Not before the end of this transaction.’ Yoongi looks up. Overly-sweet smiles aren’t his style, but he has mastered the perfect deadpan. ‘So I wouldn’t bother waiting for her.’

Alex huffs and one of his friends joins him to lean on the bar. The man looks the girls beside him up and down and wolf whistles at her. She makes a face of disgust and turns to her friend, back to the man.

‘Why’d you do that to your hair?’ He points at Yoongi’s head.

Yoongi automatically brushes the platinum fringe out of his eyes. ‘Wanted to.’

He can feel all three of them looking at him now, taking in the hair and the piercings and the rose tattoos peeking out from where he’s rolled up his sleeves. It’s Friday’s Crappy Hour. He knows what comes next.

‘Hey, guys.’ Hoseok steps in front of Yoongi just as Alex’s friend opens his mouth to say something. ‘You wanna go take that booth in the corner? I’ll bring your drinks over to you when they’re ready.’

Yoongi and Irene can perform in front of customers and pretend to be unfazed as they have expletives thrust at them. It’s a skill you perfect when you’ve worked in customer service as long as they have. But Hoseok’s performance is impenetrable. His voice isn’t too sweet, but it’s not malicious. It’s the perfect tone to make the men think he’s on their side, but everyone else know that he’s going to kick their arse if he needs to.

Alex steps back a little bit, trying to regain his composure. He straightens his shoulders and gives a short cough. ‘I’m a paying customer. If I want to stand at the bar, I can. This is ridiculous, I was just being friendly to Eileen.’

‘Exactly, Alexander. You’re a paying customer so you deserve the best service we can offer.’ Hoseok’s smile doesn’t waiver. But the sarcasm is starting to seep into his tone now. ‘So if you sit down, sir, your drinks will be right with you.’

‘Come on, Alex.’ The man who hasn’t spoken puts a hand on Alex’s shoulder. ‘Not worth it.’

‘God, you fucking get the service you pay for in this place.’ Alex’s voice is audible over the growing volume of the pub. Yoongi’s heard the words he’s using enough for them to stop cutting into him. They just sting a little now.

Hoseok takes one of the beers, tips half of it out, and fills it with water. As he does the same with the others and places them on a tray, he turns to Yoongi. His customer service face has gone now, replaced with a look of concern. ‘You still want more hours?’

The front door clicks open and there’s loud chatter and familiar laughter from the hallway. The noise is stifled when Jimin and Taehyung see Yoongi and Namjoon sat on the sofa, staring at them.

‘Sorry, we thought you guys were asleep.’ Taehyung adjusts the cardboard box under his arm.

‘Yoongi just finished his shift, so we thought we’d watch something before bed.’ Namjoon turns down the volume on the TV. ‘Wait, you thought us being asleep was enough to justify you breaking in at 2am?’

Jimin walks into the living room and throws himself into the armchair, legs hanging over the arm. ‘We didn’t break in. We have a key.’

Yoongi hits pause on the remote and fuzz appears on the screen over the novel adaptation Namjoon insisted they watch. ‘We never gave you a key…’

‘Yeah, we know.’ Taehyung places the box down in front of the TV and sits on the floor as he rummages in it. ‘So now you’re not watching that, want to watch one of these instead?’

Namjoon leans over Taehyung’s shoulder and winces to see the VHS tapes Taehyung is sorting through. ‘And what’s that exactly?’

‘Nature documentaries,’ Jimin helpfully adds as he kicks off his shoes so they fall to the floor, and fling pieces of dried mud onto the carpet. ‘He found a huge box of them really cheap and I promised we could watch one when we finished our assignments.’

‘In our house? And not the flat you’re paying actual rent for?’

‘We don’t have a TV,’ Taehyung says as if it were the most obvious answer in the world. He finally picks a tape and slots it into the VCR. Orchestral music starts and the room is lit a shade of blue that shimmers with the waves shown on the screen.

‘Wait, is this about the ocean?’ Namjoon leans closer to the screen.

‘Oh, no you don’t, Kim Namjoon. Don’t you go and encourage them.’

Taehyung just grins at Yoongi as he slides next to Jimin in the armchair. How two grown men can fit side-by-side the wrong way in an armchair, Yoongi’s not entirely sure.

There’s a reflection of the reams of fish circling each other in Namjoon’s glasses as he stares at the screen. With his housemate lost to the hypnosis of sardines, Yoongi falls back in the chair and accepts that he’s not getting Jimin and Taehyung out of his house. He feels his muscles become heavy as he allows them to rest after a gruelling Saturday serving low quality beer and diluted cocktails. Yoongi watches a killer whale dipping below the surface as he tries to focus his thoughts on the documentary, though they insist on being elsewhere. The same place they’ve been in for the past 24 hours. He chances a look at Taehyung who now has a visibly tired Jimin leaning against his chest.

Taehyung catches his gaze. ‘You okay, Yoon?’

‘Yeah,’ Yoongi says as he turns back to the TV and watches birds circle above the water, waiting for a chance to dive.

‘Did you know that the birds rely on hunting dolphins to drive sardines closer to the water’s surface so it makes it easier for them to dive?’ Namjoon doesn’t blink as he recites the fact. ‘The ecosystem is so interesting.’

‘Yeah, nature’s fucking cool,’ Taehyung agrees.

Jimin gives a light smile as he picks up the hair hanging round Taehyung’s shoulders and starts to braid it. ‘Yoongi, stop looking at us if you’re not going to talk. If you’re jealous, just cuddle Namjoon. He needs it as much as you do.’ He gives a wry smile as he looks up from where his fingers are weaving Taehyung’s hair.

Yoongi sighs and gives in. ‘Taehyung, you’ve always wanted to be a teacher, right?’

‘Uh huh,’ Taehyung says, mouth slightly open as he watches a killer whale separate a seal pup from its mother. ‘Since I was a kid.’

‘How did you just… know?’

‘Same way you did about music.’

Taehyung's not looking at him, but Yoongi shakes his head anyway. ‘No, that’s not the same. You have a direct and concrete path. Undergrad, teacher training, and now you know you’re going to become a teacher.’

‘Only if I pass.’

‘Which you will, babe,’ Jimin says as he presses a kiss to Taehyung’s jaw.

‘Jimin,’ Yoongi says quietly so as not to disrupt the documentary for Namjoon. ‘What about you? Did you always know what you want to do?’

‘Hmmm, not really,’ Jimin considers. He takes the hair tie from Taehyung’s wrist and finishes off the plait. ‘I’m not sure I even know what I want to do now.’

‘But you’re doing a masters, right? Surely you have some idea.’

Jimin twirls the braid in between his fingers as he looks at the screen, but his eyes aren’t focused enough for him to be taking it in. ‘I know I want to do something in psychology. I was good at it in school, found it interesting enough that I wanted to carry it on, so I just did. You need a masters in psychology for your degree to be worth anything, so now I’m doing that. And once I finish my placement, I should be able to get a decent job out of it.’

Namjoon finally tears his eyes from the screen as blood from the seal pup leaks into the ocean around the killer whale. ‘Why are you giving the kids the third degree?’

‘I don’t even know.’ Yoongi presses himself further into the sofa cushions and closes his eyes. ‘I really don’t know.’

‘I can’t believe you’re making me eat at a Wetherspoons.’ The man opposite Jungkook looks around the pub as it bristles and hums with people enjoying their Sunday off. Jungkook was able to grab a table, but close to the bar so pub-goers have been accidentally knocking them and their table as they eat. ‘If you hate me and my taste buds that much, just tell me to my fucking face.’

‘I was helping you out, Jin. Plus I know the manager.’ Jungkook lifts a hand and waves at a red-haired man watching them avidly from the bar. Hoseok winks back at him before going back to serving. Jungkook shrugs and puts another piece of barely-unfrozen-lasagna in his mouth. ‘And it’s cheap innit,’ is all he can get out through his mouthful.

Jin makes a face of disgust as he watches Jungkook chew, mouth open. ‘Firstly, nice of you to assume that I’m paying. Secondly, I make enough money to upgrade to… A Pizza Express or something.’ He watches Jungkook rip off a piece of stale garlic bread and avoids his brother’s eyes. 'You know, you can't ask to meet me and then not say anything.'

'I have been saying things.’ Jungkook's words are barely discernible as he rushes his glass up to his mouth and take several large gulps of Coke.

‘Nothing substantial. I’ve been asking you questions but you’ve either ignored me or just said “fine” and shoved something into your mouth.’

Jin goes to continue, but Jungkook holds a finger up at him to wait until he's finished the glass. 'You know what, I've changed my mind. I might go for a pint,' Jungkook says as he darts for the bar, but there's a firm hand on his wrist.

'Jeon Jungkook, you've been ignoring my calls for two months now.' There’s no smile on Jin’s face as he stares  Jungkook down. ‘We’re going to sit down and we’re going to talk.’ There’s usually a laugh that underlies Jin’s voice, but it’s missing. That's why Jungkook sits back down without arguing.

'Fine.'

'If Mum didn’t keep me updated, I would have assumed you suffocated under a pile of empty Monster Munch packets.'

'Fine.’ Jungkook places the last piece of lasagna in his mouth and throws his cutlery onto his now empty plate. ‘What do you want to know?'

Jin leans back in his chair. 'Let's start simple: how are you doing?'

'Fine. How are you?'

'I'm good. Work is stressful as we’ve just taken on a new client and we want to keep them, so I’m having to put overtime into that. I actually have come straight from an impromptu meeting, even though it’s a Sunday. But my pay went up so I'm looking into a getting a new apartment.' He smiles. 'See? It's not difficult to say more than "fine". How's school going?'

'Taehyung wants you to play trumpet for our band,' Jungkook blurts out.

He's met with Jin's raised eyebrows arching over widened eyes. 'What? I haven't played since uni.'

'Yeah, I know but the band's really struggling at the moment and we could really do with something different. And Taehyung has been binging Louis Armstrong and it's getting to his head, also did you know that Louis Armstrong the singer and Louis Armstrong the trumpet player are the same person? Because Taehyung didn't until last week and—'

'Take a breath, JK. You're tiring me out.' Jin takes a sip of his drink and watches the bubbles move as he places it back down on the table. 'I can't believe you're still working on the band. You should be focusing on uni.'

'Oh, you played in the orchestra all the way through uni. Like that's any different.'

Jin rolls his eyes. 'That was a university organised thing. Everyone was a student and we were all doing it aware that it was a hobby. Your “band” is you and three of your slacker mates “trying to make it” isn’t the same thing.’

'Yeah, it is! You did it because you enjoy it, and I really just... I really fucking love my dumb band made up of my “dumb slacker mates”, and that's why I am focusing on it full time.' It takes Jungkook a second to realise what has fallen out of his mouth just as the last word has left.

'What? You can’t manage that and classes.’

‘I know that.’ Jungkook’s made his bed, so now it’s time to take a damn power nap. ‘That’s why I’m dropping out of uni.’

Jin rubs his forehead with his thumb and index finger. ‘That's why you haven't called, isn't it? Because you knew I would kick your arse.'

'That and you've been really busy with work, so it's not easy to get in contact with you. But yes, probably the weighing-burden of being a family disappointment etc etc.'

'Have you told Mum?'

Jungkook looks at the ugly pattern of the pub carpet. 'Not yet. I’m still doing the paperwork, I was just going to tell everyone when it’s all finalised. So you guys wouldn’t be able to try and change my mind.'

‘Have you even thought this through?’ Jin runs his hand through his hair so it’s swept off his forehead. It just means Jungkook can see the frown in his eyebrows more. ‘Without uni, you won’t get the little student loan you do get, so you need a full-time job. And you’ll have to move back home or even with me. Gigs aren’t going to pay enough for you to live in even in the shitty flat you’re in now.’

‘I don’t know, I’ll find something.’ Jungkook looks out into the bustling pub around them. People are sat laughing at each other over the table, taking sips of beers and making the most of not being at work. When Jungkook comes here normally, it’s on a weekday evening because the rest of the gang are normally working on weekends. ‘I’m just not happy at uni. The workload is so difficult and I was never interested in business management in the first place. Namjoon has said he’d take me on as an apprentice at the tattoo studio. Yeah, it’s not the band, but I can still do my art and have a stable job. Then I’ll just use the rest of my time to work harder to make sure the band succeeds.’

Jungkook can feel Jin’s gaze on him, but he can’t bring himself to return eye contact. Whenever he catches Jin’s eyes, he just feels immense guilt.

‘You really hate university that much?’

Jungkook nods. ‘Taehyung has tried to tutor me as like experience for his PGCE, and I have worked really hard at it but I just… I don’t think I’m cut out for academics. But I’m really good at performing, Jin.’

‘And modest.’ Jin dabs at his mouth with the cheap paper napkin.

‘Usually, yeah. But it’s the one thing I have.’

The crowd seems to be getting louder as the alcohol settles into people’s bloodstreams. Jin rubs at his forehead. ‘The band is failing, you said so yourself.’

‘Yeah, but I also think it could work. And I’m willing to put my all into it to make it happen. We just… need something…’ He sighs and watches a girl spill three pints down her front. ‘We need something different. Make us stand out.’

Without saying anything, Jin gets up and Jungkook watches him wade through the other customers to get to the bar. After some time in which Jungkook is pretty sure he quelled four panic attacks, he comes back with a pint of beer for Jungkook and a clear drink for himself.

‘What did you get? Water?’

Jin slips into his chair and Jungkook already regrets his question when he sees that Jin is trying to suppress a grin. ‘Tonic water,’ he only just manages to say with a straight face. ‘I’ve already got the… Jin.’ As he winks, Jungkook imagines ways he can use his straw as a garrotte. Instead, he sighs into the head of his beer.

'Look…’ Jin’s smile has disappeared now. Jungkook’s seen this facial expression before on his internship Jin’s company last Summer. Like he’s about to give a presentation to a board. ‘You care about this band a lot, right?'

'Honestly? More than anything else right now. But we’re not getting many paid gigs and labels don’t give a shit. Which is why Taehyung is going on about his "jazz" thing.' Jungkook embellishes his words with unenthusiastic jazz hands.

‘I lied,’ Jin says into his glass, ‘this has a double shot of gin in it.’ Jin downs his drink and slams the glass back on the table, causing the ice cubes to jump out. ‘So let's cut a deal.'

Normally, Yoongi feels a sense of satisfaction when their last notes bounce off of the breeze block walls. But, as the other boys turn to each other and nod in approval, all he can hear is his own out-of-tune bass note undercutting the chord. Taehyung holds his hand up for a high five. Yoongi eyes it up and down before he walks past him to place the bass back in its stand.

‘How are you getting on with the new guitar, Yoon?’ Namjoon shouts across the garage.

‘New? It’s in its late-thirties and hasn’t aged well. His wife left him for a hotter, newer bass that was way richer. In tone.’

Yoongi tries hard to fight the feeling of discouragement that threatens to weigh down his chest. As he’d played, he’d come to realise that the different strings meant he had to relearn how much pressure to use to get a clean note. The neck has a wider curve than his old one and he had to keep repositioning his hand. A slightly drunk Jungkook once described him as the most reliable member of the band, saying that he kept in time with Yoongi rather than them keeping in time with the drums. But with the amount of wrong notes he’d scattered throughout the song, he didn’t feel he deserved that title at the moment. So for now, he sits on the beat-up sofa he and Namjoon shoved against a wall and holds his head in his hands.

‘You’re being too tough on yourself again, Yoongi.’ Namjoon places his own guitar in the stand and comes to sit next to Yoongi.

‘I can’t get on with that guitar,’ Yoongi mutters as he rubs his face with his hands.

‘Look, we have no drummer today so it was gonna be difficult anyway. And you’re a good player and could master any guitar given to you and make it sound amazing. You did it with that trash pile you played for the last ten years.’

‘You take that back.’ Yoongi’s head shoots up and he points a finger at Namjoon’s face. ‘Meredith was the only woman I’ve ever truly loved. We made so many beautiful memories together. We trusted each other unconditionally.’

‘Who is Meredith?’ Taehyung takes a large gulp of water and wipes his mouth with the back of his hand. ‘Wait, is Yoongi going through a break up?’

‘We only broke up because she died.’ Yoongi slumps further into the sofa.

‘Wow,’ Taehyung says as he pats at Yoongi’s shoulder. ‘Tough break, man.’

Namjoon sighs. ‘You’re too trapped in your own head, Yoongi. We’re gonna make this work, okay? We’re gonna start making money and you can own all the bass guitars you like.’ Namjoon pushes himself to his feet and takes the water bottle from Taehyung's hand. Yoongi takes advantage of the space on the sofa and flops onto his side, arm between his legs.

The garage door clatters open and Namjoon sends the water bottle flying across the room accompanied by a loud yelp. Taehyung grins as Namjoon starts to curse under his breath.  Yoongi remains on his side and stares ahead, unblinking.

'Hey, I'm back!’ Jungkook’s voice is quiet compared to the noise of the shutter, which is a rarity. Normally the clattering of the metal panel is inaudible under the sound of him and Taehyung yelling loudly about some random topic. Bonus points if Jimin is with them. But this time his voice is soft, almost shy. He leans his skateboard against the wall and stands with his hands in his jean pockets.

'How was lunch with your brother?' Namjoon asks, as Taehyung starts to yell Jungkook’s name as if to make up for the unusually quiet entrance and traps Jungkook in a hug that looks painfully tight.

'Erm, I actually...'

A man steps around the corner of the doorway with a black case in his hand and comes to stand next to Jungkook. The boys never need to dress nicely, so they don’t. In this household, jeans that don’t show half your thigh are considered “formal wear”. So the man’s tailored, grey business suit may as well be a fucking ball gown in the context of their garage. There are even press lines visible in his shirt under a sky blue tie. Yoongi last saw their iron when Jungkook was using it as a makeshift dumbbell when his gym membership ran out.

Yoongi pushes himself onto his elbows to get a better look. As the man looks around the garage, his furrowed eyebrows are striking in the same way Jungkook’s are when he’s focused on something, or lost in the heat of a performance. There’s a similar slant to their noses.. But where Jungkook is slouched as he pulls his signature black hoodie tight around him, the man stands slightly taller, and adjusts his blazer against the heat that’s been trapped in the garage.

The man twitches his head to the side before he speaks, and Yoongi recognises it as a habit he's come to associate with Jungkook when he’s nervous or stressed. The man coughs and adjusts his demeanour. He gets taller, broader somehow. There’s a smile on his face which feels more like a friendly smirk. 'I'm Seokjin. Jungkook's older and more attractive brother. But please call me Jin.' He winks. Yoongi winces.

Nobody responds at first. Namjoon’s eyes flit between the two of them, as if he’s playing spot-the-difference between the faces of the brothers.

Yoongi allows himself to take in Jin’s face and something flips in his stomach. He’s good with words. He has years’ worth of notebooks, filled with hastily scribbled lyrics, piled up in the back of his wardrobe upstairs. But when he takes in Jin’s face, there’s an innate feeling in the pit of his stomach and Yoongi can only translate that emotion into “Jin’s face really pisses me off”.

Jungkook kicks at Jin’s leg with a knock-off Timberland which leaves a dust mark on his suit trousers. ‘Half-brothers. I’m equally as hot, just in a different way. Hot like my dad.’

Jin gives a short “ha!” and scoffs. ‘I think you just negated any allure you have by referring to your dad as “hot”.’

             Jungkook has only mentioned a few things about his brother over the last two years. Like how they freed the neighbour's chicken’s during Jungkook’s two week vegetarian phase, or how he used to bring Jungkook armfuls of snacks when he was studying for exams, or the time he stole their parents' car to pick Jungkook up from a party and they crashed it into a McDonald’s sign. But Yoongi is struggling to pin the image of that Jin onto the man in front of him. All he can feel is a deep sense of anger that he can’t quite pin the source of.

Taehyung grins and holds his hand out to Jin, who shakes it. 'Lovely to see you again, Mr. Seokjin, I'm Taehyung. I don’t know if you remember me, but we’ve met a few times when you’ve visited our place.’

‘Tae, I know who you are. There’s no need to—’

‘I’m Jungkook's best friend, roommate, and partner in crime.'

'Wait…’ Jin stares Taehyung down. ‘That’s different from the last time you recited that introduction. For the love of God, I really hope you don’t mean that last one literally.’ Jin tries to drop Taehyung’s hand, but Taehyung seems reluctant to let go.

'Oh, no! That was just one time.'

'That house party at Halloween,' Namjoon reminds him.

'Okay, twice.’ Taehyung leans in and places his hand beside his mouth as if it will shield his words from Namjoon. ‘That he knows of.’ He winks.

Namjoon tuts and gives Taehyung a light shove out of the way. He's the only one who can really match Jin in height, but Namjoon very much fits in with the aesthetic of their garage in his yellow-flannel shirt and beanie pushed over unwashed hair. Jin emits an entirely different aura — one of salaried-employment maybe. Yoongi lies back down and places his forearms over his eyes.

'Hi, I'm Kim Namjoon. I'm the lead guitarist and frontman.'

'I, erm, can’t say I know much about rock but… Isn't that normally the lead singer that does that? Who’s that?'

Taehyung waves. 'Yours truly.'

Jin nods slowly. 'Okay, yeah. Yeah, that makes sense now.'

It goes quiet. Yoongi moves his arms to see what's happened and finds four pairs of eyes looking back at him. Then it dawns on him that he’s the only one who hasn’t introduced himself. He sighs and pushes himself to his feet and feels so small now he’s stood in front of Jin, who blocks the April sun so he's mostly a silhouette to Yoongi. Yoongi is quite grateful for that; he's not sure how easy it would be for him to talk if he had to look directly at Jin’s annoying face.

Yoongi offers his hand. 'Yoongi. Bass.'

Jin takes it and gives a firm shake. 'Seokjin. Marketing.'

'Jungkook. Tired of this conversation,' Jungkook adds as he finally walks into the main garage and looks around. He coughs and shuffles on his feet. ‘So, Jin has agreed to help us.’

Taehyung’s eyes go wide, a large grin takes over his face. ‘Really?! You’re going to play trumpet for us?’

Namjoon turns to Jungkook quickly. ‘Wait, your brother is a trumpet player? How come you never mentioned this?’

‘I just did, didn’t I?’ Jungkook shrugs. ‘We both did music growing up, but he stuck with classical and I moved onto rock. His style of playing was never relevant to ours, so I just… never mentioned it.’

‘We have a deal, though.’ Jin’s voice is deliberate, each syllable clear and annunciated. ‘I will come and help you guys out as long as Jungkook goes back to university.’

There’s a silence. Everyone slowly looks at Jungkook who has stilled and curled in on himself.

‘We had a long discussion about that, though.’ Namjoon changes his normally friendly tone to match the firmness in Jin’s as he walks towards him. ‘It wasn’t an impulse decision he made; we spent at least a month talking it over with him and weighing everything up. And we decided that his health and happiness is more important than his education.’

‘Oh, and I totally agree.’ Jin softens his tone, like a compromise. ‘Which is why I’ve said he only has to finish this year and then he can work out what he wants to do after that. But he doesn’t have a job lined up, or any career path in mind, and a degree will help him with that when the band doesn’t work out.’

‘Excuse me?’ Yoongi’s outburst forces Jin to look down at him again.

‘Oh, shit, sorry!’ Jin holds his hands out towards Yoongi, as if to calm him down. ‘If. If the band doesn’t work out.’

Yoongi knows it was a slip of his tongue, but the kernel of anger in his stomach grows slightly. He glares at Jin for a second before rolling his eyes and walking towards his guitar.

Namjoon ignores Yoongi and continues to talk. ‘Okay. I can’t say I totally agree, but it does make sense. You only have a few months left, Kooks, yeah?’

Jungkook gives a small nod. ‘Yeah. Final exams are June.’

Namjoon rubs at his chin as he stares at the floor. ‘Okay, that’s only two months. We do this because we love it and money shouldn’t really matter, but unfortunately we live in a capitalist society that doesn’t accept “love” as a currency. So if there’s any chance we can do this and make money off if it…  So if you’re able to help us achieve that, Jin, and Jungkook is okay with going back… I think we can try it.’

Yoongi wants to say something, a snide remark or sarcastic comment, but remembers that it’s Jungkook’s brother. Instead, he tries to place the image Jungkook had created of Jin onto the suited man in front of him, not Seokjin From Marketing who exudes an energy of arrogance. Yoongi bites at his lip and goes to adjust the tuning of the bass. It doesn’t deserve a name. Not even pronouns.

‘Okay, good. I’m glad we’re on the same page.’ Jin walks over to the sofa and places the case down. The side of it is adorned with various stickers from orchestras and wind bands. But the most noticeable is a large holographic one in the centre that reads “musician at work: stand back in awe” and it just cements the feeling Yoongi has had from the beginning: Jin’s a bit of a prick.

‘So shall we get this started?’ Jin says as he flicks open the locks on the case.

‘Wow,’ Taehyung says as he watches Jin take the trumpet out. ‘I’ve only seen gold trumpets before.’

Jin lifts the instrument out of its case and the April sunlight coming through the doorway catches on the silver of Jin’s trumpet. As Yoongi looks up as subtly as he can, he takes in the pattern engraved onto the pipes. Plant stems trail down from the mouthpiece and gradually bloom out into lilies that engulf the trumpet’s bell.

‘When I bought this,’ Jin’s voice is quiet as he turns the instrument over in his hands, ‘I was planning on going professional. I saved up for years and made sure I got the best one I could. She’s top of the range, and I feel like I’ve neglected her.’

‘You call her a she?’ Namjoon comes and joins the huddle forming around Jin. ‘That’s funny because that’s what Yoongi—’

‘Can it, Joon.’

Jin plugs the mouthpiece into the instrument and blows through it wiggling the buttons. It’s not musical. In fact the noise reminds Yoongi of a steam train firing up.

‘I uh,’ Jin says as he takes the trumpet away from his mouth. He sounds almost shy now. ‘I haven’t played in a while. Just on and off for the past few years. You know, with work and everything.’

‘You should have heard him when he was at uni,’ Jungkook adds as he moves to sit on the stool behind his drum kit and turns from side to side. ‘His orchestra loved him so they’d give him these solos where the rest of the orchestra just accompanied him. Cornettos, they’re called.’

‘Concertos, dipshit.’

‘Yeah,’ Jungkook blinks at Jin innocently. ‘That’s what I said.’

‘Glad five years of violin lessons paid off, Jungkook.’

Taehyung sputters and almost falls over one of the guitar leads. ‘Violin, Kookie?’ He clings onto the mic stand. Yoongi can see his shoulders shaking. ‘Seriously?’

Jungkook throws a drumstick at Taehyung that he narrowly avoids. ‘Shut up or I’ll strangle you with my bow as you sleep.’

Jin goes to lift the trumpet back up to his mouth, but stops when he realises everyone else is watching him, waiting. He moves it away again. ‘I am about to play for the first time in three years. I’m only going to warm up, but I would like to be able to sound like shit without you guys watching me.’

They all turn away and try to busy themselves. Taehyung does awkward vocal warm ups in the corner. Namjoon starts to talk to Jungkook about uni again, who just watches him with large, shining eyes. Yoongi pretends to rub at one of the many scratches in the paintwork of the bass as if he has any chance of getting rid of them. They all hear Jin play a note. It’s piercing to the ears of someone used to the strum of guitars, but there's still a distinct fuzz around it. It seems to wobble and Jin says a sharp “fuck” before trying again. The note is clearer, closer to what Yoongi understands trumpets are supposed to sound like from the few jazz songs he’s begrudgingly let Taehyung show him.

Jin jumps between different notes. The others can’t pretend to be busy anymore and all turn to watch as his fingers move into various positions. It sounds like the classical music Yoongi skips past immediately on the radio. It feels foreign. It echoes too loudly around the breeze blocked space.

Taehyung’s jaw drops slightly as Jin starts to play again. The others struggle to pretend to be busy, But Taehyung is mesmerised by Jin’s fingers as they deftly move the buttons to get various notes. Although Yoongi can’t share the sense of awe that Taehyung has been overcome by, he can’t deny that it’s interesting to watch. It’s like catching a glimpse of someone speaking a foreign language in public and being unable to tune their unusual inflections and words out as you pass them. But at the end of the day, it sounds like the classical music Yoongi skips past immediately on the radio. Jin’s last notes are too loud in the breeze blocked space.

‘Okay, I think I’m warmed up. You wanna start?’

‘Erm, yeah…’ Namjoon says as he turns from Jungkook. Taehyung is still staring at Jin, eyes trained on the trumpet. He goes to open his mouth, most likely to bombard him with questions, but Namjoon ushers a quick “come on” and pulls him towards his guitar.

‘Okay, cool. So it probably makes more sense to have you come in during the chorus? Taehyung will signal when he’s singing the last line of the first verse. Chords are C, D, E minor, G. You can improvise around that, right?’

‘No. Not really.’ Jin looks around himself, stood at the side of the setup. ‘Don’t you have any music I can work from?’

Namjoon tilts his head. ‘Oh… we didn’t prepare any. Taehyung said you did jazz, and we know jazz trumpeters are pretty chill with improv.’

‘I’m not a jazz trumpeter.’ Jin blinks at him. ‘ Actually, I’ve actively avoided jazz because improvising scares the shit out of me.’

‘Well what did you even do then?’

Jin turns sharply to look at Yoongi, a tiny glint of disbelief in his eyes. ‘Jungkook already said: orchestras.’ His syllables are sharp, each sound crisp. ‘I can only really play from sheet music. Never composed, never really improvised. But if you give me a full piece of notated music, I do it fucking well. I just need the notes to bounce off of first.’

Yoongi groans. ‘Jungkook, did you really bring in someone who doesn’t play jazz… to play jazz?’

‘What? I never said jazz, that was Taehyung. And I didn’t think Jin would need music.’ Jungkook adjusts himself on his drum stool. ‘When you did solos at concerts, you didn’t have music.’

‘Yeah, that’s because when you’ve played the same piece a hundred times, you can play that shit without thinking.’

Taehyung drops his gaze, big smile gone, and adjusts his microphone stand in silence. His movements are slower.

‘Look, I’ve said I’ll help and I guess… I can try and push myself out of my comfort zone.’ Jin blows through his instrument and inhales deeply through his nose. ‘I’ve done some improv years ago so let’s see what happens, I guess.’ He walks into the side of the room covered in their cords and various instruments. He comes close to Yoongi, who takes a few steps to the side. Jin watches him and their eyes lock. The movement had been a unconscious one, but Yoongi can’t back down now. He looks at Jin and is forced to take in a face that feels distantly familiar and feels anger start to simmer in his guts. Jin gives him a small, sarcastic-looking smile and looks back to Namjoon who is reading through the lyric sheet.

‘What are the chords again?’ Jin asks as he adjusts himself on his feet.

‘Err… C, D, E minor, G.’ Namjoon speaks to Jin over the sheet, but his eyes seems to watch Yoongi muttering expletives to himself. If Jin hears, he doesn’t acknowledge them.

Jungkook counts in and they start to play. It’s the same song they’ve played a million times, but the notes seem more structured, stricter to the beat and tone that normal. It’s either as a way to impress Jin or to make it easier for him. Yoongi imagines it’s a mixture of both. As Taehyung sings the cue line, Jin takes a deep breath and brings the instrument to his lips. The notes cut harshly through the hum of guitars and hits of Jungkook’s drums. But it’s not just the tone which Yoongi expected. None of the notes slot into the chords from the guitars and instead sit uncomfortably on top of them. One by one, they drop out until it’s just Jungkook’s drumbeat. He cuts off the sound with one hand around his cymbal.

‘Oh, fuck!’ Jin’s outburst echoes around the room, sharper than any of the notes he’s played today. ‘I forgot that the instrument is in B flat and you’re all in C. I forgot to fucking transpose.’

Yoongi lets out an exasperated sigh before he can catch himself and Jin turns sharply to face him. The striking eyebrows Yoongi noticed earlier are pushed together. Yoongi tries to soften his face to convey that it was an automatic reaction and not on purpose, but the weight of Jin’s glare makes Yoongi feel like it’s too late.

Jin closes his eyes and exhales. ‘Look. I tried, but you can’t just expect me to come in here and improvise without any kind of guide music. Do you know how difficult that is?’

Namjoon places his guitar down and comes to slot himself between Jin and Yoongi. He does it calmly and tries to make it look natural, but Yoongi senses that Jin is just as aware that it’s to separate the two of them. ‘Sorry, Jin. I guess we are so used to improvising ourselves that we didn’t really consider how that would work for you.’

‘Yeah, Jungkook said you were a good player so we just kind of relied on that.’ And yet again, Yoongi’s words fall out of his mouth before he can filter them.

Jin leans around Namjoon to stare at Yoongi, rendering the barrier Namjoon attempted to create futile. ‘I am a good musician. Or, well, I used to be a few years back. I just expected some kind of guide.’ Jin’s words are aimed directly at Yoongi now, who lets his guitar hang from the strap around his neck so he can cross his arms over his chest.

‘Erm, none of us really read music,’ Taehyung says tentatively. A sliver of his voice catches in his mic so it bounces around the garage. ‘Namjoon and Yoongi can a tiny bit. We just read tab or go off of the chords.’

Jin presses his free hand against his forehead and pushes his hair off of it. ‘Okay, so we’re speaking different languages, aren’t we?’ He sighs. ‘As lovely as…’ He chances a glance at Yoongi. ‘Most of you guys seem, I should actually be working on a presentation for Monday and just came here as a favour to my bratty brother. You guys have a good evening, but I’m going to have to go.’

Jin walks back to the sofa and places his trumpet back in its case. It makes a sharp noise as he slams the lid down. He takes confident steps towards the door.

‘Jin, wait!’ Jungkook holds out a hand towards him. Jin turns around immediately at the sound of his voice. ‘Love you,’ he says and blows him a kiss.

Jin blinks at him for a second. ‘Go die in a hole,’ Jin says as he blows one back.

They watch him walk down the driveway, but nobody says anything until a minute or so later.

‘What the fuck, Min Yoongi, was that?’ Namjoon strides towards Yoongi. ‘I know you have a short temper, but you normally don’t slip as easy at that.’

‘Look, his face annoys me.’

Namjoon stares at him and crosses his arms. ‘Really? That’s your reasoning?’

Yoongi knows how dumb it sounds. He knows that he was unreasonable. But he also hates being wrong, so he just nods.

Namjoon is about to start what Yoongi assumes will be a lecture, but is distracted as Jungkook pushes himself up from his drum kit and walks between the two of them.

‘Kooks, where are you going?’ Namjoon raises his voice so Jungkook can hear them as he walks out of the garage door.

Jungkook turns to face them and walks backwards as he talks. ‘I’m going to get my dumb fucking brother before he cuts me out of his will.’

And as Jungkook turns to run down the street, calling Jin’s name and “you big fucking loser”, Yoongi lets the anger pulsing around his body cover the small pang of guilt sitting in the bottom of his stomach.

‘Hey!’ Hoseok waves at them all as they walk in. ‘You guys are earlier than usual, rehearsal go alr—’

‘Double whiskey, Hobi.’ Yoongi leans against the bar so his head is facing down. The hairs on his forearm stick to the residual alcohol on the wood.

‘Oh...’ Hoseok looks to the others, as if they can give him an explanation just through shared glances. ‘So, wasn’t a good one today. You still mourning Meredith?’

Taehyung audibly suppresses a laugh.

‘Yeah, he was in a mood about that anyway.’ Namjoon wipes the sweat from his forehead. ‘Then we had Jungkook’s brother come along to play trumpet with us today, and then Yoongi’s grumpy arse pissed him off. Jungkook went after Jin, but I think he’s going to come along later.’

‘Okay…’ Hoseok looks at the rest of them who are hovering around the bar, not really sure where to look. ‘You guys take the normal booth, and I’ll bring your usuals to you.’ He glances at Yoongi. ‘Apart from the diva here. Who I’m going to give alcohol now before he starts whining again.’

Yoongi, whiskey firmly in hand, slots himself in the booth next to Taehyung, who is talking animatedly about something, but Yoongi can’t bring himself to pay enough attention to work out what. Only these arseholes could bring him into his own place of work on a rare Sunday off.

'So what do you think of him?' Taehyung seems to be asking both of them, but Yoongi notices Taehyung’s eyes flit to him.

'He looks a lot like Kooks,’ Namjoon answers instead when Yoongi wrinkles his nose and takes a large sip of whiskey. ‘But... I don't know, from the stories he told us, I expected someone different. Someone that matches Jungkook’s personality. Like Kooks is shy when you first meet him, but he’s a menace once he gets comfortable. Jin is…’

‘A cockhead?’

‘No, Yoongi, I was going to say “confident in himself”. The guy turned up in a suit, for fuck’s sake.'

'I've met him a few times before…’ Taehyung says as he adjusts the purple velvet sweatshirt he found in a bin a few months back. ‘Normally they go out for dinner with their parents, but sometimes Seokjin comes round and plays video games. He's nice.'

Yoongi scoffs and they both turn to look at him. 'What?'

'I literally said "he's nice" and you made a face.' Taehyung winces at him.

'I... I don't know.' Yoongi crosses his arms. 'I know I was out of line, but so was he. And even before that, he just had an arsehole vibe from him. He turns up here looking like — '

'Like he's taken good care of himself and buys formal clothes that actually fit?' Namjoon raises one eyebrow at Yoongi.

'Yeah exactly! What a prick!’ Yoongi slams a hand on the table making Taehyung drop some of his beer.

‘Yoongi, why do you feel so strongly about this? I know he pissed you off, but so do most people.’ Namjoon smirks at Yoongi over his beer.

‘Because–’ Yoongi starts, but realises his tone is loud and harsh and that’s giving Namjoon exactly what he wants. So he takes a deep breath and another elongated sip of whiskey before starting again. ‘Look he's a classical musician, right? They're always dickheads. Just because their parents paid through the nose to get someone to teach them “Every Good Boy Deserves Food”. You can’t just buy talent. Fucking wankers.’

'Wait, didn't you use to take piano lessons?' Namjoon smirks.

'Yes, but I’m a wanker with talent.'

Namjoon nods. ‘I know. I’ve walked in on you too many times. Impressive.’ Yoongi can feel Taehyung’s shoulders shake as he tries to hold back giggles.

'Oh, fuck you guys.'

'Talking of fucking guys…’ Hoseok appears with three pints on a tray. ‘Are we just going to ignore the fact that Jungkook’s brother is really hot?'

Namjoon splutters. ‘What the fuck?’

Taehyung hugs himself as he bends over laughing.

‘How do you even know what he looks like?’ Namjoon wipes beer from his face as Hoseok sits next to him.

‘He was in here earlier with Jungkook for lunch. I undercooked Kook’s lasagna on purpose, hoping he would complain and I’d have to spend more time with his brother.’

‘God, you’re so chaotic.’

‘Thank you, Yoongi.’ Hoseok winks as he sets the three beers on the table. ‘But he is a very beautiful man.’

'Oh, he really is.’ Taehyung draws a face into the condensation on his own beer glass. ‘You should see Jimin whenever Jin’s at ours. He just glares at him.’

‘Why? Does he hate him?’ Hoseok tilts his head to the side.

‘Na, just gets angry that he’s not the hottest person in the room.’ Taehyung dart his eyes to his beer as he sips at it. ‘I mean even Jin’s not that hot,’ he mumbles into the glass.

‘Jin’s okay looking, I guess.'

'Oh piss off, Yoongi,' Hoseok takes a drink of his own beer. ‘There’s nothing wrong with acknowledging that a man is beautiful.’

‘Shouldn’t you be working anyway? Go and do your fucking job.’

Hoseok winks. ‘I’ve decided that if I have to let people take cigarette breaks, I’m gonna take a break to take another legal drug.’ He takes a couple of large gulps before he speaks again. ‘I’m the manager. I can do what I want. Which, right now, is getting you to admit that a man is hot.’

'Look, I'm just saying he obviously thinks he's more attractive than he actually is. I don't want to fuck Jungkook's brother.'

'Good.' Jungkook appears next to Yoongi, who lets out a small yelp and immediately hits at Jungkook afterwards. 'I don’t want any of you fucking my brother.’

'Not an issue,' Namjoon raises his hands, pint still in one.

'Your brother is really fucking hot, Jungkook.’ Hoseok slips out of the booth again to let Jungkook in. But it just makes it easier for Jungkook to stab an elbow into his side. ‘But! I value your friendship and wouldn’t act on it.’

‘Thanks,’ Jungkook says warmly as he slides into the booth.

Hoseok turns around to wink as he walks away. ‘As much as I would let him wreck me.'

Jungkook makes a face of disgust. 'You're vile!’ He shouts across the pub. ‘You’re lucky you give me free drinks or I’d hop over that bar and dunk your head in the ice machine!’

Jungkook downs the rest of Hoseok’s beer, and then there’s silence. At first Yoongi thinks it’s just in contrast to the shouting, but then he notices the other two glance at Jungkook then back to their own drinks.

It’s Namjoon that breaks first. ‘Are you sure you’re okay with carrying on with uni?’

Jungkook shrugs. ‘Not really. But if it means Jin is happy to help out...’

‘That’s not a good enough reason to go back to something you hate, Kooks.’ Yoongi’s tone is low, quiet.

‘Honestly, at lunch, Jin made some decent points. It sucks, but it’s only two months and then I can quit for good if I want. And we still get Jin to help.’

‘Is he even still willing to help us? You know, after…’ Namjoon looks at Yoongi, but darts his eyes back to Jungkook when Yoongi meets his eye. ‘After today.’

‘Honestly, I told him not to worry about coming back. I’m not sure I would.’ Jungkook looks out into the pub around them. As they wait for him to respond, he quickly turns around with a large grin on his face and grabs Taehyung’s beer and starts to down it. Half of it is gone by the time Taehyung is finally able to wrestle it from his grasp. ‘But yeah, we talked about it after I caught up with him.  He said he made a deal and he’ll stick to it as long as I do.’

‘But is it worth him sticking to it?’ Namjoon rubs at his eyebrows. ‘I don’t want to upset him again like we did today.’

‘What do you mean “we”?’ Taehyung says as he throws a pointed look at Yoongi next to him.

Yoongi sighs as he gives up his resolve to not be part of this conversation. ‘Look, I know today was slightly my fault.’

Namjoon scoffs.

‘I honestly don’t think it’s going to work, even outside of what happened today. We’re going to have to put time into helping Jin play that we should really be putting into our own playing. And brass in rock music seems like a dumb idea.’

‘You know who else uses brass in their music?’ Namjoon leans forward against the table.

They’re quiet until Yoongi says, ‘oh no, oh don’t you dare say Earth—’

‘Earth Wind and Fire. And there’s a reason they’re one of the greatest bands of our time.’

Taehyung claps his hands together. ‘Yeah! Brass just sounds good. It really adds to any song.’

‘Look,’ Yoongi can feel himself losing his patience. The harshness is seeping into his tone again. He makes an effort to hold it back. ‘Just because you’ve suddenly “found yourself”,’ he accentuates with air quotes, ‘through jazz music doesn’t mean you need to bring us into it. We don’t need brass or jazz, we just need to work hard.’

Taehyung presses a hand to his chest, eyes full of hurt. 'We all need jazz, Yoongi. Even if we don't know it yet.'

Hoseok appears again with another tray of drinks and pushes himself back into the booth, sandwiching Jungkook in between him and Namjoon. ‘Please tell me you guys are talking about Jin and how beautiful he is. Because I have a lot more thoughts to add. Number one—’

‘His possible beauty is negated by the fact that he’s a total cu—’

‘Yoongi, that’s my brother!’

‘Oh, nice to see it runs in the family then.’

‘Look, it wasn’t my fault he came along! If you’re gonna be a twat to someone, make it Taehyung. It was his idea!’

Taehyung looks at the finger Jungkook is pointing at him, mortified. ‘Look, I was the only person to make a suggestion! If you guys don’t think it will work, then we’ll just drop it. But at least I said something in the first place.’

‘I mean, I wasn’t there, but…’ Hoseok looks at Yoongi and Jungkook who are still glaring at each other. Taehyung runs his finger around the rim of his glass. ‘Look, you guys have been struggling for a while now. And it’s not a lack of skill or talent. God, I’ve done sound setup for so many bands but you guys are the only ones I’ve kept in contact with. But from what I’ve seen from the circuit, I think you just need something different to force people to pay attention. Then your talent is what makes them stick around.’

Namjoon nods. ‘Taehyung had a really good idea, actually.’

Jungkook almost spits his beer out, but saves himself. It just dribbles down his chin instead. ‘He did? I thought we all agreed that bringing my brother into this was a disaster.’

‘Disaster can be good though, sometimes.’ Hoseok starts drinking his beer, and Yoongi is incredibly glad he’s not working a shift under Hoseok today.

‘Hoseok’s right. We’ve got so set in our ways and rituals, that we’ve just kind of… Stagnated.’ Namjoon claps his hands together and the movement jostles Jungkook, who does spill beer this time. ‘We’re going to make this work. Nietzsche said—’

The whole table groans.

‘Nietzsche said,’ Namjoon raises his voice over the noise, ‘that you have to have chaos within yourself to give birth to a dancing star. And maybe Jin completely disrupting everything we know and his music being so drastically different ours will be what helps us shine.’

They all look at each other, then back down at the table.

‘I was right?’ They all look up to see Taehyung pointing at his chest, large smile. ‘I came up with the solution?’

‘Yeah, you might have, Tae.’ Namjoon gives the smile he does after one of them masters a part they were struggling with, or if one of the kids come up to him with some lyrics they want to try.

Yoongi scowls. ‘Yeah or you could have also just put the final nail in our second-hand coffin.’

‘How… How does that even work?’ Taehyung’s eyes are wide.

‘At the rate you’re going, it was probably yours the first time round.’

‘Min Yoongi!’ Hoseok gives him a sharp kick to the shin under the table. ‘For fuck’s sake, stop threatening to murder the kids. If we can’t afford a new bass for you, we can’t afford three funerals.’

‘Maybe Jungkook’s brother can pay for it. His suit probably cost more than my rent.’

‘God, Yoongi,’ Namjoon groans, ‘why do you care about Jin and his fucking suit so much?’

‘Probably because he wants it on his bedroom floor,’ Taehyung says and he leans over and high fives Jungkook as they both let out loud “wahey”s. Hoseok smacks the back of Taehyung’s head with the drinks tray.

Jungkook’s face falls into one of horror. ‘Wait, why did I high five you for talking about Yoongi wanting to bone my brother?’