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“I don’t get it, we won the love live. I was able to sing with all of them in the biggest stage, and yet…”
She has been in this state of mind throughout the day, and she was certain it wouldn’t let her sleep. Despite accomplishing their main goal Kanan was still feeling uneasy, precisely because it was the last thing they set to achieve together, and now the time has come for them to pursue their own goals. She thought she had come to terms with that, but something was holding her back
“And yet, I don’t want to part ways with Mari again”
It wasn’t easy seeing Mari leave the first time, despite being what Kanan thought at that moment it was best for her. The first few days were filled with doubts and regrets until she eventually convinced herself it was the right thing to do. So when Mari came back, rather than being happy, an inner conflict between whether she made the right choice or not arised. She tried to keep her distance, sometimes a bit too aggressively, because she didn’t want to confront the possibility that maybe she was wrong.
Lucky for her Mari didn’t back down, and on one rainy day, all their feelings came out to the surface in the form of a well earned slap and a heartfelt apology hug.
Now more than ever, Kanan regretted her decision the most. Having Mari back in her life after so long made her realize how much she loves her, if only she didn’t push her away she wouldn’t have lost 2 years of her company. Knowing that Mari was just hours away from leaving made her yearn for those years.
“How ironic, now that she is leaving by own decision I just want to grab her hand and never let it go”.
Just like the circumstances of this farewell were different, Kanan knew she couldn’t allow the same mistakes as last time, so she decided to visit Mari and tell her how she was feeling. She wasn’t doing it to talk her into staying, after all they have different goals and they must chase them, she simply didn’t want to leave anything unsaid.
“There’s only one thing I have to do dad, but don’t worry, I’m ready for tomorrow”
Mari hung up the phone and went back to the balcony, hoping to see a light shine from the pier one more time. She wanted to talk to Kanan, and even thought about going to her place instead, but she figured that if anything was happening tonight it had to be on that pier.
“Our last moment together has to be there”
It didn’t take long for Mari’s wish to come true, she was so happy to see her there again, but she was also nervous. 2 years ago she failed to convey her feelings, however, now she would make sure to say everything that was on her mind, hoping that Kanan felt the same way.
“Mari, sorry for coming so late”.
“Don’t worry about it, right now time is the last thing that matters. Is everything ok?”
The melancholy in both or their tones was evident, but neither of them bother to hide it, because this was a moment of honesty.
“The truth is, I can’t sleep tonight. I thought I was ready to start a new journey without you, and even though we spent this year together, it still feels like you just came back to my life”.
“Kanan…”
She couldn’t hold her tears any longer, she wasn’t trying to. As she was crying she rushed towards Mari and hugged her, something that took the blonde by surprise, but she embraced her strongly with tears rolling down her face.
“I know we have to go, but I wish we could stay like this forever, I wish I didn’t drive you away 2 years ago. I’m sorry for being selfish Mari, but I don’t want to lose you again”.
Kanan and Mari stood there for a bit without saying a word, as if they were trying to permeate the warmth they were feeling so it could stay forever. Mari eventually broke the silence, seeing as how Kanan was going through the same as her, it was time to remind her of a very important fact, some words that have kept Mari at ease ever since she made the decision to travel to Italy.
“Kanan, thanks for everything. I don’t know what would be of me if you didn’t sneak into my house when we were kids, if you didn’t convince me to become a school idol, if you didn’t care so much for me that you threw away your dream, if you didn’t look for what is best for me. We have shared so much together and I’ve come to depend on you, but just for a little while, it’s time for us to have our own experiences”.
Mari broke the hug, she noticed a bit of resistance from Kanan, but when they finally split and looked into her eyes she could see a heartbreaking sadness in it. She approached her to take a tear off the cheek and then continued.
“I feel the same way as you Kanan, I don’t want to leave you. But just like the first time, we’ll meet again, and when that day comes I promise you I’ll stay by your side forever”.
“But…”
“Or did you forget those words already?”
Mari turned around, closed her eyes and remembered that moment in the boat, just before she took off on her helicopter 2 years ago. She looked back at Kanan, and with big smile on her face said:
“Even if we are apart, I won’t forget about you”
Kanan’s eyes widen up, a sudden realization hit her like a bolt of lightning. She certainly wasn’t in the right state of mind to remember those words, let alone tell them to Mari one more time, but the fact that she brought them back erased any fears Kanan had. As long as they never forget those words, they will always find their way back to each other. She wiped any tears left, opened her arms, and to reassure Mari she was fine, she answered with a smile of her own and said:
“Give me a hug”
“She has never looked so beautiful” Mari thought. That brightness in Kanan’s face that made her fall in love was there again, never has it shined as strong as it was now. Mari slowly walked towards her, dumbfounded by her smile, and hugged her back. Nothing more needed to be said, so they stayed like that for a while. No more sadness, no more worries, just a hug between two people who loved each other, who were ready to live new adventures by themselves, and more importantly, who would one day reunite to stay together forever.