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When I Find Your Heart Anew

Summary:

Written for the Swan Queen Week Midwinter 2014. Day five: Evil!Emma AU.

When Hook takes Emma and Henry back to the Enchanted Forest after collecting them in New York City, he is overcome by the Wicked Witch of the West who takes Emma and leaves the rest of them for dead. When a small group—theoretically led by Snow and Charming, but spearheaded by Regina—tries to rescue her, they find that the Witch has turned against them the only person they can’t kill: Emma herself. Desperate, Regina decides to sacrifice herself for the woman she gave up on once already.

Notes:

The only things alternate about this universe are that Emma’s heart can be removed and that this is so not how this storyline is going to play out, it might as well be an alternate universe altogether.

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This was not how it was supposed to go. Hook was supposed to collect Emma and take her straight back to the castle; he had known the roads were unsafe, why even attempt to travel the Enchanted Forest with a cargo as precious as Emma and Henry? The Wicked Witch of the West’s reaction had been swift and deadly; Hook, just barely clinging to life, many of his shipmates dead, Henry in a magically induced coma and Emma… Emma was lost to them now.

Regina Mills, the Queen, had not moved from the side of her little boy. When magic was involved, it was so much harder to heal the sustained injuries and the Witch—the Black Fairy—now reunited with her wand possessed some of the most powerful magic Regina had ever seen. She had tried every potion, had cast every spell, had attempted every remedy, but Henry would not awaken. She had kissed him over and over again, hoping for True Love’s power, but with the memories of her erased from his memory, her lips, her pain, and her sorrow meant nothing to him. Not enough to wake up, at least.

“Regina…” Snow’s voice was gentle, filled with pain, but it still stung—her step-daughter’s intrusion into the bright room feeling sacrilegious and disrespectful.

“What?” She questioned as she spun her head around, the heavy leather and lace collar of her dress creaking. She may have redeemed herself at least partially by taking them back here and assisting in fight upon fight against the Black Fairy, but with her son’s life on the line, she was still very much the Evil Queen. Snow White stepped back a pace, flinching from the venom in her tone.

“Everyone is here.” Snow answered her meekly, but there was fire in her expressive eyes and Regina took a steadying breath. Reeling herself in, she let her tense shoulders sag. She mellowed her voice.

“I will join you shortly.” She answered, and Snow studied her a moment. Perhaps she had planned to say more, but she eventually decided against it and left, closing the heavy wooden door behind her to leave Regina alone in the spacious bedroom in which her son lay virtually lifelessly. The only thing keeping him alive at this point was the spell she had placed on him, much like in Neverland. She squeezed his small, chilled, hand one more time before she stood, her dark and severe dress billowing about her as she left the room with purposeful strides.

It was time to plan the Wicked Witch’s demise.

Her entrance into the war room was impressive—as always—and Regina was sure that no matter what she did to redeem herself, at least half of the people in this room would flinch whenever she entered—especially when she still filled out the wardrobe of the Queen so well. The clothes that wrapped around her like familiar and well-worn armour were a comforting lifeline in the face of her rage. For once, she was plotting, though, and not being plotted against by the side of questionable good.

She expedited the planning phase as much as she could, trying not to take the wind out of the sails of the Charmings too much—they were in as much pain as she was, after all—but unwilling to listen to the drivel of dwarves, fairies, and werewolves. In the end, the plan was as simple as it was dangerous: Charming and Snow would take the bravest fighters in under the cloak of Regina’s magic, and they were not coming out without Emma.

The eve of battle, a small group gathered at the forest’s edge; Regina herself, Snow and Charming, Mulan, and Granny Lucas—all armed to the teeth—as well as Ruby stood ready to fight. Regina and Ruby did not need any weapons and while the others checked the last of their weaponry, Ruby and her shared a small smile of recognition. Both carried something in them with the potential to destroy—both themselves and others—and both had taken lives with their abilities. They knew the cost of using their power, and they were willing to pay that price if it meant Emma’s safe return.

Regina waited for the full moon to stand proudly in the sky before arching a single eyebrow. After so many battles together, they did not need words. Ruby nodded and with determined fingers, she undid the binds of her cloak. Watching her shift was a magnificent sight, and Regina smirked as she turned to the castle, the group rallying around her. Ruby’s canine form pressed into her leg a moment as she growled darkly in her throat.

Indeed, Regina though as she eyed the dark castle that had once been her home but which had been overtaken by the Wicked Witch. It is time to go home.

Their intrusion into the castle was as swift as it was deadly. Snow White and Widow Lucas were still master archers, and Ruby’s speed and stealth overtook her enemies before they even knew what was happening. From the darkness of the courtyard, Ruby’s yellow eyes settled on her and the vision of blood dripping down soft fur was enough to inspire the bloodlust in Regina. As Mulan and Charming fought off anyone who got close enough to the archers and her, Regina did what she did best: kill. And because she did it in name of the woman she loved, she had no qualms about it.

The fireball that ripped the door to the throne room from its hinges could be felt all the way down the hallway, and Regina smirked as she passed through the fading flames. The Wicked Witch was right where she had expected her to be… and at her feet sat Emma Swan, perfectly unharmed, perfectly unmoved. Regina had not expected that—expected her--not here. She had expected the blonde to be locked up in some dungeon, not seated by the throne as the Black Fairy’s lapdog. Visions of their tearful goodbye paralyzed her a moment, but Snow White’s arrow zooming by her wretched her mind away from the intense pain.

The arrow should have pierced the heart of the Witch, but before it could reach its goal, Emma jumped up, her sword appearing in her hand as if by magic, and swatted it away. Regina only now realized that the blonde was dressed for combat, in grieves and a breastplate, and that the usually shining emerald of her eyes was dead.

The Wicked Witch smiled deviously at her the moment Regina connected the dots, and strong eyes battled. This was not her Emma. This version of her belonged to the Witch. Their nemesis had taken the heart of the woman Regina loved beyond life itself, and as soon as she realized this, she was flooded with memories of her mother, how literally heartless she had been, and what it had caused her to do.

“Watch out for Emma!” She called while everyone else was still catching up to the fact that Emma had just saved the life of the Wicked Witch of the West. It was just in time, too, because Emma hoisted her sword effortlessly into a proper fighting stance as she crossed the small divide between her and the group, a wicked smile on her features—a smile that broke Regina’s heart.

It was Mulan who stepped up to stop the blonde fighter, and their swords clashed dangerously. Mulan was a good fighter, and while Emma seemed to have improved her technique—especially for someone who most likely still had no memories of her time in the Enchanted Forest brandishing a sword—Mulan would have been able to best her effortlessly. Yet, Regina could see the panic in the Asian warrior’s eyes as she parried another blow; this was a fight Mulan could not win, regardless of her skills, because Emma could not be hurt. She was protected by the love her attackers had for her.

Regina realized that they had lost this round; with the Wicked Witch there to counter all her magic, and with an undefeatable foe on the attack, they simply could not win. At Ruby’s short bark, she tore her eyes from the Black Fairy and saw the guards pour in from the hallway. They were too late; they had lost the element of surprise.

Mulan cried out in pain as Emma’s sword drew blood, and Charming jumped between them, pleading with Emma to stop, to reconsider. Regina realized there was nothing to reconsider for Emma; the Wicked Witch had her completely in her power. As the arrows and bolts bounced off of an invisible shield that had come up in front of their green-skinned foe, the Wicked Witch laughed, and Regina spared one more moment to take in Emma—the woman whom she now knew had been her destiny from the beginning. She had seen it when she had fainted; memories of a life unlived washing over her. A long life, together, raising Henry and healing each other. Giving that up had been the price of the curse; her price to pay—and she had. Yet, with the blonde woman so close yet so far away—knowing what she did now—this moment hurt worse than saying goodbye to her before. Now, she was not leaving her to her own happy ending; now she was leaving her to a life of servitude.

Charming sagged to a knee, sword falling from his grip as he eyed the blood that gushed out of his gut. Snow cried out and rushed towards him as Ruby flew past them with complete disregard for her own life. Her considerable weight caused Emma to stumble and fall, but Regina could see the hand that reached for a dagger at Emma’s belt. Ruby would not move off of Emma, she knew; not unless Ruby was dead. A few more minutes, and Charming would not survive. Mulan lay unmoving on the stone floor. Regina spared herself only one more moment.

“I will destroy you!” She promised Zelena, and as the dark laugh of the Witch washed over her, so did the swirl of magic as a purple cloud engulfed them. The room faded, and the cold darkness of the night washed over them as they materialized in the forest. They were all there, Regina noted with relief, and two quick spells later, both charming and Mulan were being helped to their feet, both pale as sheets from the experience. A blood-covered Ruby joined them in her red cloak, and sought comfort with her grandmother. No one spoke, and the only sound in the group came from Snow, who awkwardly clutched to her husband as she sobbingly made peace with the shock of what had just transpired.

It was Mulan who joined her as she stared at the castle in the distance, giving everyone a few more moments to adjust before they would have to move. They exchanged a look—the look of lovers separated from those whom their heart belonged to—and they understood wordlessly the pain the other felt. Regina knew what she had to do now, and she would do it alone.

They made it to the castle with only minor incidents—the biggest one in the form of Snow White, who had all but attacked her in her grief, shouting at her to explain why she had not taken Emma with them as they left; why she had left her there, with her. Regina tried to explain magic, how teleportation required consent, but knew that Snow White did not really care. She had lost her daughter, again, and just like Regina’s heart, Snow’s was shattered as well. Regina left her in Charming’s care and went to visit her son.

As night fell again, she pressed a soft kiss to Henry’s forehead and once more took in his beautiful face. She would do anything for him, she realized; her little prince. She would do this; give him back his mother. With a wave of her hand, purple clouds engulfed her and when she rematerialized, she came face to face with the Wicked Witch, who had obviously expected her.

“You are brave, Regina,” the green witch complimented from her throne, “…but your emotions always made you weak.”

Regina almost didn’t realize the extent of the ruse in time. She barely managed to turn around before the sword penetrated the soft leather of her corset, and then slid on to pierce lenient flesh and tissue. Emma was so close, so agonizingly close, and Regina’s pain-filled brain nearly forgot to execute the plan—the plan which was desperate, and stupid, but it was all she had. As she grabbed Emma’s sword arm and pulled it harder against her—causing the sword to cut deeper, protruding from her back as the blood dripped down sickeningly from the blade—she reached into her own chest with a groan that was too quiet for the violence bestowed upon her.

She heard the Witch move behind her now, but she didn’t care. She let go of Emma’s sword arm and wrapped the freed hand around the back of Emma’s head before tearing her own heart out of her chest.

“I love you…” She whispered as Emma searched her eyes, trying to understand what was happening. The blonde gasped as Regina groaned and forced her heart—her shining, beating, thumping, heart—into Emma’s chest before pressing her lips firmly against Emma’s. For a blissful moment, she could feel her lingering love soar, but then a numbness crept in and overpowered her completely. Her lips fell away from Emma’s and she watched passively as Emma’s eyes lit up and her hand flew off of the handle of the sword as if it was red hot.

“Regina…” The blonde whispered reverently, but the sound meant nothing to her anymore. Instead, she turned, not caring about her injury, not caring about anything but the purpose she had imprinted upon herself.

Today, the Black Fairy would die.

The green woman’s face was contorted, but with the loss of her own emotions, she had also lost the ability to interpret those of others. ‘Anger’, perhaps, or ‘fear’; not one of the positive ones. The terms meant little to her now.

“Go, Emma.” She spoke blankly as she pulled the sword from her body with both hands, letting it fall to the floor with a clash. She could hear the blonde hurriedly run off; the Wicked Witch’s hold over her broken now her heart had been replaced. She hoped Emma would get out on time, because the smell and electric feel of magic was slowly filling up the room as both witches geared up for battle.

It was a brutal one, and Regina knew she was losing the second she started. Without fear, though, or love, or regret, Regina would fight to the bitter end—an end that was coming anyway because of her injury. She gave as good as she got, but still found herself on hands and knees, panting against the dizziness she had been left with after her body had been flung into a wall—or maybe it was just the blood loss. It didn’t matter; she was only staying alive at this point because she wanted to give Emma time to flee. After that, she was taking everything with her; this castle, the Wicked witch—she would destroy it all in one big bang.

“You were never a match for me, Regina. Never.” The venom in the Witch’s voice passed her by without a second thought; she couldn’t be hurt now. She just needed the Black Fairy to come a little closer… close enough to touch. As more insults trickled from finely shaped lips, the distance closed more and more. Regina couldn’t keep her weight up anymore and sagged to the floor, turning her head enough to watch the Witch’s feet come closer.

Just a little more.

The sound of steel scraping over stone rang out through the room in sharp contrast to the deadly silence that had settled in-between whispered words of spite, and then the feet slowed to a halt. Something landed with a thud just out of Regina’s field of vision and she scraped her head over the cold stone to look at it. As the Black Fairy’s body landed heavily next to her on the floor, Regina stared into wide open and lifeless eyes; the Wicked Witch of the West was dead, decapitated, and Regina looked up to find Emma standing over her, chest heaving, bloody sword in one hand, a pulsing heart in the other. With a smile, Regina closed her eyes. It was done.

“No no no no, Regina, don’t die. Don’t… not now. Come on, heal yourself. I know you can do it. Heal yourself, damn it!” Emma was crying now, running her hands through Regina’s hair as she pulled her head onto her lap, turning Regina’s body around so she was lying on her back and looking up at the vaulted ceiling.

It took a while to figure out why Emma wanted her to heal, but she lifted her hand over the wound regardless. Emma was right, with the Wicked Witch dead, there was no need to die anymore. Icy blue light radiated from her hand a moment as flesh reknitted and organs mended. Her skin stitched together and she let her hand fall.

“Done.” She announced blankly, staring up into green eyes that dripped tears onto her face. Blonde curls danced over her forehead as Emma leaned down and pressed a kiss onto her lips, an awkward move for sure but one she managed to pull off. Regina let herself be kissed before asking the sole question on her mind… “Why did you come back?"

“I think… I love you too, Regina.” Emma whispered, and Regina frowned.

“You remember?” She questioned, but a tearful Emma shook her head.

“No, but you do. Please, take your heart back. I have mine here. Make it right.” Emma pleaded and Regina struggled to sit up. Emma helped her and Regina prepared herself before plunging her hand into Emma’s chest. She was really drawing on her reserves now, fatigue setting in.

Forcing herself to focus, she pulled at the heart, feeling elated as it gave way under her fingers easily. Before long, she held it in her hand, observing it objectively and finding it far less dark than the last time she had looked upon it. Emma pushed her hand towards her chest, and Regina forced the organ into it, gasping as emotions flooded over her, straining the already feeble hold she had over her sanity. Tears came to her eyes as she looked upon Emma, who sat heaving on the cold floor, heart still in hand. Carefully—fingers shaking—Regina extracted it from her fingers and with a loving smile, she pressed it into Emma’s chest.

Once more, the numbness faded from Emma’s eyes as she gasped with the sensation, but instead of love, it was replaced with confusion. It shattered Regina, but she still reached from Emma’s hand.

“Do you remember what you just felt for me? What I feel for you?” She questioned and Emma nodded. There was an urgency in Regina; a warning that they needed to hurry, because if they waited too long, Regina wouldn’t have the energy to get them home—and they needed to get home because Henry was there—oh God, Henry. Panicking now, she tried not to rush Emma into the next step towards healing Henry—and her own heart.

“Do you trust me?” Regina asked, trying to keep her voice soothing, and again Emma nodded without reservation. With a reassuring smile, Regina slowly leaned forward. Emma flinched back a little when she realized she was about to be kissed, but then relaxed into it, letting Regina brush their lips together gently. With her aching heart in place, Regina could feel her love soar through her system, fill every part of her and before long, she cupped Emma’s cheek and brought them harder together. She kissed her with her entire being, with every ounce of her love, and smiled when Emma ripped her head away, tilting it back as a startled sob tore from her. The shockwave that came from her rattled the glass in the windows and caused the few surviving smaller objects in the room to tip over and fall. Regina watched and waited, a soft but slightly apprehensive smile on her features.

This time when emerald eyes set upon her, they were filled with emotion—emotion as bright as when they had said goodbye. For a moment, they just looked at each other, hands gripping together as they shared a widening smile.

“I didn’t realize—not until you were looking at me like that and it was too late. You knew… when did you know?” Emma asked breathlessly.

“The vision. It wasn’t just Henry I had to give up; that was your assumption. It was the both of you: my happy ending.” Regina admitted, her voice breaking in the onslaught of emotions she appreciated much more now, now she was aware of how it was to be without them. Emma smiled at her and was about to say something when realization hit.

“Oh God! David, how is he? Mulan? I-What did I—” Emma’s eyes went wide with panic and Regina untangled one of her hands to cup her cheek.

“Emma, Emma! They’re safe, they’re fine. We got out in time to save them. They are probably in the castle right now, resting. It wasn’t your fault, so don’t even start blaming yourself.” Emma’s eyes were watery with tears and Regina smiled at her with all the love her tired body could muster.

“They’re fine.” She repeated, imploring Emma to believe her, and slowly, Emma relaxed under her hands. Perceptive eyes traced her face, and Regina looked away, not used to so much attention—and certainly not with worry in the eyes that scanned her.

“How are you doing?” She asked genuinely concerned.

“I’m fi—” she couldn’t complete the lie. Not with Emma. “…I’m tired.” She admitted. Emma nodded and looked around her. As she froze, Regina followed her gaze. In the door opening stood a few guards, staring at them, weapons at hand but unsure how to proceed now the Witch was dead. With all the strength and poise she could muster, Regina scrambled to her feet, a fireball at the ready.

“Get out of my house!” She growled more bravely than she felt herself to be at the moment. If they were to attack, it would mostly be Emma fighting them off, she realized. One by one, the guards scanned the Queen, their previous ally now standing protectively in front of her with her sword at the ready, and their boss decapitated on the ground. The tension lasted a moment longer, before they backed away slowly, never losing sight of the women until they rounded the nearest corner. Emma snorted and even Regina couldn’t suppress a smirk as she extinguished the flame in her hand. Sagging a little, she realized they really needed to go; her legs were about to give out under her. Emma’s form stepped protectively into her space and Regina wrapped an arm around her shoulders as Emma’s came up around her waist to steady her while enjoying their close proximity.

“You look good in that getup.” Emma commented cheekily, and Regina couldn’t stifle a laugh.

“You don’t look too bad yourself, white knight.” She sassed, indulging herself a moment longer. She leaned up to press a soft kiss on Emma’s lips and marvelled at the fact she could do that now, that Emma—her Emma—was back. Then, with a flick of her wrist, she brought them home.

Needless to say, the shock of having the Queen and the Savior appear together in the war room was great—especially because Regina collapsed the second they arrived. Arms were drawn on the blonde, who gently put Regina down before holding up her hands and explaining in short order what had happened.

When fright gave way to relief and joy, the reunion was postponed until Regina—who had awoken again by that time—was helped into a seat. While most of the joy was directed at Emma for being back—restored memory and all—Regina got her fair share of praise. Ruby was the first to appear at her chair, placing a solid hand on her shoulder and squeezing gently. She lifted her own hand to cover Ruby’s for a moment without taking her eyes off of an overcome Emma. The others followed, sometimes with outright praise, sometimes with reluctant words or gestures—it didn’t matter. Emma was back. To the side, Mulan was trying not to appear affected by the reunion and Regina’s heart went out to the young woman, but she smiled as Ruby sauntered up to her.

Waking Henry was a simple affair now Emma was back; a lingering kiss on his forehead was all it took—again—and while his memories were still gone, Regina knew she would win him back eventually. He would grow to love her again, just like he had done as a child. She would break his curse in due time and until then, he would always be her little prince. He was kind to her, even with his altered memories, and accepted the knowledge that she was his mother, too, with the resilience of youth. She watched him now as he practiced his sword fighting with David, and wrapped her arms tighter around Emma’s waist as she sat in her arms on a nearby bench. New evil would arise; they all knew that. For today, though, she accepted the small blessings; Emma’s love, a moment of reprieve, and her son—healthy and happy—back in her life.