Chapter Text
October 5 th - Six Months After The First Bomb
Five Months After Jake Griffin's Death
The teens
Raven
She didn't know where she was, or what had happened, but when her eyes opened, she knew one thing for sure, she was alive. Her brown irises welcomed the cold light of the room around her, the walls, which once probably were bright green colored, to symbolize spring and hope, now had turned almost white. The door was metallic, reflecting the buzzing light from the lamp attached to the ceiling.
Raven blinked several times, her eyes were burning, and her body felt heavy in the bed that was apparently supporting her. She tried to move instinctively, her body trying to regain control of her limbs. As soon as her arms had forced her into a sitting position, she felt it.
The pain.
It started to spread rapidly all over her spine burning and biting her flesh, her breath caught in her throat, and she tried to inhale and exhale deeply, but she couldn't, she tried to yell but her scream died in a knot that was closing her throat, preventing her from breathing normally.
What is happening? She thought.
And then it hit her, her mind ordered her legs to move, and she realized that the left one wasn't able to do that.
What is this? Her mind started to work fast around those thoughts.
Her heart was exploding in her chest, the pain in her back was atrocious, her eyes were filled with tears, and she was panting heavily.
What happened to me? Her mind cried out.
And then finally her voice freed itself and escaped her lips, a long scream flew into the silence around her. The cold room around her reverberated with it, and hot salty tears started to roll down her cheeks.
“Help me!” she yelled. She knew it wasn't a good idea to yell like that, she knew it well, but what was she supposed to do? The pain was unbearable.
Then was when the metallic door opened, and someone entered the room.
“We need help over here, Abby!”
Someone yelled, Raven turned her head toward the voice.
“What happened? Help me! I can't feel my leg, help me please!”
She sobbed, tears rolling frantically down her eyes, drenching the white blankets around her body. She hadn't yet had the courage to lift them.
“It's ok, we are gonna help you, it's ok.” the young man said. Raven shook her head, the pain was pulsing incessantly in her back, her eyes burning, her head spinning.
“Help me!!” she snapped, yelling with all the strength she had left. Then was when her body collapsed, her mind faded to black, her eyes closed, and she crashed on the bed.
Bellamy & Octavia
“You don't wanna do this son, trust me!” the soldier yelled, his voice heavy and dangerous, it reverberated in her head.
“Let her go, please, take me, but let her go!” Bellamy pleaded. She couldn't see him but she could hear his voice, he was suppressing a sob.
“No, leave him alone!” her mother said, her voice was so familiar, and yet the way it was trembling scared her to death.
“Follow me Ma'am.” the soldier ordered, and then was when it happened, heavy steps on the floor upon her head, then something crashed on the wooden panels, throwing dust in her green eyes.
“No Bellamy don't!” her mother yelled, then a gunshot, it was so loud and yet so fast, her brain registered it and deleted it in the same instant.
“No! You bastard! No!” her brother's voice roared to life again, and at that she curled up in a ball, hiding her head in her hands, her legs pressed against her chest like a protective shield. “You are a brave girl, aren't you?” her mother's words still echoed in her memory.
After several minutes spent with her palms pressed to her ears to shut off any noise, the floor creaked to life again, and then someone opened the panel.
“No!” she yelled, crying, already pleading for her life. “You are a brave girl, you are a brave girl.” Her mind kept encouraging her.
“It's ok O, it's me.” Bellamy's voice reached her ears. At that, she looked up instinctively. He was kneeling, offering her his warm hand. She took it immediately and he helped her out.
“Bell, what happened?” she asked, crashing against his chest, hiding into his familiar scent. He wrapped his arms around her.
“We need to get out of here, now!” he hissed, she looked up at him with a frown engraved between her eyes, he withdrew and started to move fast around the house, collecting everything he found on his path, throwing in a bag some food, some water, two jackets, a pair of shoes.
“Mum doesn't want us to use them, they are there in case of emergency, you can't take them.” she said, her arms wrapping her trembling body. Bellamy froze and looked at her. And at that moment she spotted the bodies on the floor, right in front of the door, behind her brother's shadow. The color of the shirt, the long black hair, the tiny shape. It was unmistakable.
“No...” she whispered, her voice cracking under the weight of her emotions, her mind started to spin, her eyes were already filling with burning tears, and her heart started to beat frantically. “No, please no...”
Bellamy took several steps toward her and then wrapped his arms around her. “I'm sorry O.” he whispered in her hair. Octavia said nothing, her breath caught in her throat, she started to sob, heavy tears rolled down her cheeks, her heart broke into pieces, and her mind was able to form just one thought.
No, no, no, no, no....please no.
Clarke
“This isn't a good idea.” she whispered while looking at the old man on the bed in front of her.
“I know, but it’s so good, and your mother doesn't want me to eat it, but if I'm gonna die, I want to have some chocolate first.” he said, smiling at her, he was giving her the puppy look, the exact one she usually saw on kids' face. Clarke bowed her head, hiding a smile.
“First of all, you are not gonna die, my mother will never let you die, trust me Conrad.” she said, smiling kindly. The old man chuckled.
“I would love that princess, but unfortunately we both know that I'm too old to survive this, and your mother needs all the supplies she can for the youngest.” he smiled at her, his voice calm. He knew very well what his fate was, and he wasn't gonna complain about it. Clarke felt her chest shiver in sadness.
Don't you dare start crying Clarke. She warned herself.
“So? Are you gonna help me with this last task? The last wish of a man condemned to death?” he said again, smiling at her, his face warming up her heart. Clarke nodded, trying to suppress a sob. “Don't cry princess, your smile is so beautiful, you should smile more” Conrad said and Clarke chuckled.
“Ok, ok, you got me, I will bring you some chocolate.” she said, standing up from her chair. The old man's smile grew brighter.
“That's my girl! Be careful, your mother would literally kill me if she finds out.” he chuckled. Clarke laughed sadly and left the room.
She walked toward the storage room where most of their supplies were left, a watery smile on her lips. “You should smile more.” his words circled in her head, and a new heaviness settled in her heart, one she didn't know how to lift.
“Hey Clarke, you're ok?” Monty's voice reached her and she turned back. He was sitting on a chair, reading an old worn comic book, his black hair falling on his dark almond eyes.
“Yes, I just... talked with Conrad.” she admitted, bowing her head, toying with her fingers. Monty smiled.
“He asked you for some chocolate, uh?” he whispered, one eyebrow raised. Clarke looked up, blushing.
“You know about that?” she asked, lowering her tone in case her mother was around, Monty chuckled.
“Oh yes, he asked me too sometimes, and trust me, I would love to help that man... but your mother scares the hell out of me when she gets mad.” he said, hiding his worry behind a grin. Clarke chuckled.
“Oh yes, she can be scary and she definitely knows that.” they both burst out laughing at that, then he looked at the end of the hallway.
“Go now, your mother isn't here, I'll cover you.” he whispered. At that, Clarke sneaked inside the storage room and took one little chocolate bar from a blue box where she knew they still had some.
“Got it?” Monty asked her in a whisper. “Yes.” she said back, then stepped outside the room, closing quietly the door behind her back.
They shared a knowing look and walked toward Conrad's room. Then was when a scream invaded the quiet hallways.
“Help me!” it was coming from a room to the left, where she knew a new patient was located. Suddenly Jackson was rushing inside: “We need help over here, Abby!” he yelled.
Then her mother appeared from around the corner, running toward the screaming patient. Monty started to approach her.
“Hey, what do you think is going on there?” Clarke asked. Monty shook his head. “I have no idea.” he said, frowning.
“But don't worry, your mother will take care of it. Now go and give the man the chocolate he deserves.” he smiled, Clarke nodded and entered the room, casting a last look to the hallway, where now a defibrillator was being pushed inside the room.
“Hey princess, is everything alright out there?” the old man asked her as soon as she was inside again. Clarke nodded, closing the door behind her back.
“Yes, someone needs help but my mother is already there” - she said - “and look what I have here.” she added with a smile, showing him the chocolate bar. Conrad smiled back.
“Oh princess, you are so good to me.” he said, already stretching out a hand to take it, but Clarke withdrew it before he could reach it.
“I'm gonna give you a piece of it, just a piece, we don't want you to get worse, now do we?” she said, pointing her index finger toward him. Conrad pouted like a little kid.
“Ok... but you will not take that away, right?” he asked her as she broke a slice into pieces. “No, but I will check how much you will eat. If you feel sick then my mother will know who helped you. She knows Monty is too afraid of her to do something like that, and Jackson surely would never do that, I mean, what kind of doctor would do that, right?” she quired, offering him the sweet square of chocolate.
“Oh you're right, I don't want you to get in trouble.” he said, sniffing at the chocolate in his fingers. “This is heaven.” he sighed and Clarke smiled, sitting heavily on the chair.
“My mother loves it too, she always loved chocolate, just like dad.” she whispered, wrapping the silver foil around the rest of the bar.
“Great parents if you want my opinion.” he smiled kindly, biting at the dark sweet. “This is good.” he whispered, a content expression blossoming on his face. Clarke smiled back, her heart growing with a warm feeling.
“I'm glad you like it.” she murmured. Conrad nodded, looking at her.
“Hey princess, you're ok?” he asked her while taking another bite. Clarke blinked and then nodded, but the old man frowned.
“Don't lie to me girl, I know you, what's wrong?” he asked, sitting up and straightening his back, swallowing the last bite of chocolate rapidly. Clarke sighed.
“It's nothing... and it's everything...” she admitted in defeat, staring at the gray floor at her feet. It was so dark, but the window was broken, and since they couldn’t risk patients getting the flu, the soldiers had heavy wooden panels fixed over them. It was sad to not even have a view of the sun in there. It was always so gray and cold, but after all, outside wasn't any better.
“I'm so sorry, Clarke.” he said suddenly and she looked up.
“It’s not your fault, Conrad.” she said, smiling sadly, and the old man sighed heavily.
“I know, but I feel responsible. You are so young, you shouldn't be living this hell, we should have offered you a better future. And your father didn't deserve that... and your mother is always doing so much for us. That woman is an angel.” he said, looking at her with his black deep eyes, which seemed to be carrying thousands of stories coming from a past she had never had a chance to see. Clarke smiled and bowed her head toward the floor.
“We should all be better, but apparently... the human race can't do better. And about my father... I know who to blame for that, and that for sure isn't you.” she said, looking at him again, Conrad smiled sadly. “Don't let anger grow into you kiddo, you deserve more than that.” he eventually said, sharing a sad smile with her.
They fell silent after that, him quietly savoring his chocolate, she silently studying the floor of the room, trying to escape that world spinning around her, even if just for a moment.
But the hardest thing there, was to forget about the war around because it was all life was about now.