Chapter Text
Senku waited until everyone had gone to sleep and most of the lights were out before he braved visiting Gen. It would be potentially disastrous if someone interrupted, either on the way or while there. It was hard enough to keep one foot moving after another without someone diverting his attention.
When he reached Gen’s room, the doorway was dimly lit from the inside. Night owl that he was, it was easy to guess that Gen would be awake long after everyone else had retired.
Senku pulled back the leather curtain covering the doorway and peered in. He’d expected to find Gen mucking about with flowers or the multitude of tricks he hid up his sleeves. At the very least he expected to find him playing with his deck of cards, Senku had frequently walked in on him playing solitaire in the past.
Right now though, Gen was sitting on his bed idly pushing an empty bottle around the floor with his toes.
He didn’t notice Senku’s presence at all, too lost in his own thoughts. So Senku cleared his throat.
Gen looked up and, predictably, his expression pulled down into a frown.
“Well, if it isn’t Senku-chan. I’m surprised you remember where I live.”
Senku winced but didn’t comment.
“Can I… Can I come in?”
It was strange, asking for permission to enter Gen’s room. He was so used to waltzing in whenever he felt like it. Gen used to do the same. It only now hit him just how much he’d missed that.
“You’re half in already.” Gen rolled his eyes and got to his feet. “But whatever.”
Senku ducked under the curtain and felt it fall back into place behind him with a heavy thump. Even though he’d technically been invited in, he continued to stand in the doorframe, watching as Gen picked the bottle up from the floor and moved to place it alongside a few others on a shelf.
“Did you actually want something or did you just drop by to stare at me?”
“I, er…” This was way harder than Senku had anticipated, and he knew it wouldn’t be easy. “I just thought, well…” He sighed. “We need to talk.”
Gen snorted. “Yeah, no shit.” He turned to face Senku and crossed his arms. “So?”
He supposed it was best to be direct, especially when Gen seemed to be in no mood to put up with much of this.
“I’m sorry,” Senku blurted out, clenching his hands by his sides. “I’ve made things… difficult for the both of us and so I… I need to apologise for that.”
“Yeah, you do,” Gen agreed, his expression stonier than before. “I don’t even know what’s going on.”
“Yeah.” Senku nodded and averted his eyes. “I can explain.”
“You had better make it good.”
He wasn’t sure if he could. He knew he thought it was all pretty pathetic.
It was difficult to find somewhere to start but, while he knew it might sound like an excuse, he started at the beginning.
“You already know that I couldn’t see colour at all, for most of my life.”
“That wasn’t something I could control,” Gen interrupted. “I never- ”
“I know, I know.” Senku shook his head. “I don’t blame you for that, but it’s important. I just need you to understand that I spent my whole life thinking I might not have a soulmate in the first place.”
“But-”
“That’s not how it works, yeah, I know. But I didn’t until tonight. I probably should have looked into it, but I just… couldn’t. I know next to nothing about soulmates and that was a choice. A stupid one, in retrospect, but it’s too late now.”
Senku opened his mouth to continue but then closed it again. He gulped. He’d never spoken about all of this before, not to Yuzuriha, not to Taiju and not even to Byakuya. He’d barely even admitted it to himself.
“I always told myself that I didn’t care; that soulmates are illogical and unscientific and that most people never meet their soulmate anyway. But, yknow, not meeting your soulmate and never having one in the first place are very different and… well, I just couldn’t handle it.”
He took a shaky breath. “And I guess that’s why, when I found out that you had colour-sight before you met me… I didn’t question the idea of a one-sided bond.”
Senku chanced a look up at Gen then. He was still frowning, but it looked less severe. That was something, at least.
“I know I should have said something but just being around you… hurt. A lot. I don’t… I’ve never actually…” Senku ran his hands through his hair. “I’ve never cared about anyone nearly as much as I care about you, and the idea that I wasn’t supposed to, that you’d never feel the same… I panicked, I suppose.”
Senku trailed off and couldn’t think of anything else to say. If he thought getting it all off of his chest would make him feel any better, Senku was sorely mistaken. Now that it was all out in the open he was even more tense. Waiting for a response was agonising.
Neither of them spoke for a while, Gen just watching as Senku fidgeted under his gaze.
Eventually though, he let his hands fall back to his sides and looked away. “I believe you.”
Senku snapped to look at Gen, but he didn’t say anything.
“I definitely believe that you’d panic so much at emotional confusion as to completely regress. Not that I don’t understand that…” He sighed. “Need I remind you which of us has been pretending he can’t see colours for the past year.”
Senku felt his ears start to burn. He had completely forgotten about that, it had been so long that he’d stopped noticing.
“I guess we’re just lucky I had enough self-awareness to realise that I was jumping to conclusions. That really messed me up for a while.”
“Gen I-”
“You’re sorry, I know.” He rolled his eyes. “I know that wasn’t on purpose. But you can’t get upset at me for essentially the same thing.”
“I’m not upset with you,” Senku said, stepping forward to grasp Gen’s shoulders, forcing him to look back at him. Much to his relief, Gen didn’t shake him off. “I screwed up, and I would do anything to make it up to you.”
Gen raised an eyebrow. “Anything?”
Senku nodded. “If I’m capable.”
“You know, I’ve started to think there’s nothing you can’t do.” He smirked and leant in so close that Senku could feel his breath on his face. “Though you could always start with getting on your knees and begging for forgiveness.”
Senku blinked. He wasn’t sure if Gen was being serious. It seemed pretty demeaning, and the thought of doing it put Senku’s teeth on edge. But it was also very Gen, and if that was what it would take he’d do it. If it made Gen happy, Senku would rip his pride in half and set it on fire.
So, Senku knelt down.
“Wait, huh?” Gen watched in bewilderment as Senku gently rested his forehead against Gen’s waist.
Senku took a deep breath, one hand clutching onto the hem of Gen’s haori. “I’m sorry,” he said, so quietly that he wasn’t sure that Gen could hear. If he raised his voice much more though, he was worried it would break, and he wasn’t sure how much more shame he could deal with at that point. “You deserve so much more than I’ve given you.”
He jumped when he felt Gen’s hand on his head. “You’re not wrong.” Then he crouched down too, so they were face to face. “But also, I was kidding.”
“Yeah, I suspected.” Better to have done it than take the chance though. And then, when Gen finally smiled at him for the first time in months, it was all worth it.
“I never expected you to do something like this.” He chuckled. “You really are desperate, aren’t you?”
“Well, yeah,” Senku said, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. “I love you, of course I’m desperate.”
Gen sputtered and his face blossomed bright red. He pouted. “You’re making it really difficult to stay angry.” He pushed back Senku’s hair and smiled. “I’m really mad at you, I swear.”
“I know, I would be too,” Senku said, leaning forward into Gen’s touch. Where their skin met burned pleasantly and Senku couldn’t remember how long it had been since they were this close. Even before, they’d never been quite so… intimate. “But maybe you won’t stay mad?”
“Maybe.” Gen’s smile softened as he ran his fingers through the length of Senku’s hair. “Although I have many conditions before I’ll even consider it.”
“Which are?”
“Well for one you’ll have to up my cola supply. I demand at least twice as much.”
Senku laughed. “That’s doable.”
Gen moved so he was sitting on his knees, so close that their legs were touching. “And I want more blankets. And warmer clothes. And a more comfortable bed. It’s getting cold and I demand comfort. Also the second you can, you're building me a bathhouse.”
“I can do that. You’re hardly the only person that wants an onsen.”
Gen hummed and nodded. Then he moved forward to lay his arms across Senku’s shoulders. Senku felt his face break out in a blush but he didn’t move. “And I demand overt preferential treatment. What’s the point in dating the chief if I don’t benefit from it?”
“Having my unconditional love and affection?”
“Hmm.” Gen looked up to the ceiling as if in contemplation. “Nah, I want to be spoiled.”
Senku shook his head but grinned. He already knew there was nothing in this world he would ever refuse Gen. “Then I’ll spoil you rotten.”
“Good.” Gen leant forward so their foreheads were resting against one another. “Although I definitely also want that love and affection thing.”
They sat like that in silence for a while, eyes shut, simply basking in each other's presence. This was what Senku had thought having a soulmate was supposed to be like, this was what he’d always anticipated. He had also thought that it was pointless and something he was comfortable living without, but he was so wrong it was hilarious. Now that he had it, this was something that Senku would kill to never give up.
He opened his eyes and watched Gen’s face, letting himself really appreciate how beautiful he was. The soft lines of his cheeks, the delicate curve of his nose, the way his eyelashes fluttered as he blinked.
Without thinking, Senku lifted his hand to Gen’s face and ran his thumb against his cheek. Gen opened his eyes in response and Senku stared back.
He had wondered what he would do when he finally met the eyes that had left him in a world without colour. He had thought he might hate them, hate whoever they belonged to. But right now, staring directly into them, staring at the brilliant, beautiful person they belonged to, he could feel nothing but pure adoration.
“So,” Gen said, a small smirk rising to his face. “How long are we going to sit like this until you finally kiss me?”
Senku needed no further invitation. He pushed forward until his lips met Gen’s.
It was strange. Senku had never kissed anyone before and it was obvious that Gen hadn’t either. Neither of them knew what they were doing, but every second that passed, every movement they made, felt simultaneously electrifying and downright serene. As Gen curled his arms around Senku’s neck, pulling him forward so their chests were flush, Senku thought that nothing in his life had ever, and would ever, feel quite so right as this did.
But, as all good things must, the moment had to eventually end. As inexperienced as they both were, they inevitably had to surface for air.
They returned to a comfortable silence and Senku gently stroked Gen’s cheek as he caught his breath, delighting in the sensation of Gen playing with the hair at the base of his neck.
But then, try as he might, Senku couldn’t suppress the yawn that passed his lips.
“Tired?” Gen said, a statement more than a question.
“Apparently.”
Senku wasn’t surprised, it was late and he’d been working himself to the bone for the past week. Now that he was allowing himself to relax, to indulge in something truly good, his body decided it was time to shut down all at once.
“Stay.” Gen was so quiet it was barely a whisper, but Senku heard. “Here, tonight.”
It was music to Senku’s ears. He nodded.
Silently, they got to their feet and collapsed onto Gen’s bed. Gen reached up to turn out the light and plunged them into darkness as they wrapped their arms around each other, tangling their legs together like it was how they were always meant to be.
Lying there was almost surreal, Gen’s head tucked beneath his chin as they lay so close that Senku could feel Gen’s breath tumbling down his chest, that he could feel his heart beating under his embrace.
If it didn’t feel so real and wonderful, Senku might have thought he was dreaming.
At the very least, he knew that if it meant he could stay like this forever, Senku never wanted the sun to rise.