Chapter Text
Cas sat up in a flash, his eyes wide. Like he was seeing ghost. Shit, maybe this was a-
“Dean?”
Dean wasn't sure how to react when he saw Cas, he looked far too, human.
Castiel stood up, slowly making his way towards Dean, as if he was some wounded animal and might run off at a sudden sound.
Cas kept his eyes locked on Dean.
“Chuck?” Cas asked, his eyes bloodshot, but Dean couldn’t tell if it was from the pot future Cas apparently now smoked, or tears welling up in his eyes.
“I can't-” Cas stopped walking, he clutched his hands into fists and pressed them against his eyes.
“No, no, no-” he whispered, “this isn't- I'm dreaming. This isn't-”
Cas fell to his knees, his fists still pressed against his eyes, muttering under his breath “this isn't real.”
Dean's confusion was now through the roof, “Cas?” he asked, walking a little toward him, reaching his hand out to place on his shoulder. But Cas flinched away.
“No.” he stated. Chuck grabbed Dean by the shoulder pulling him back, “This was a bad idea,” he muttered.
“No.” Castiel stated, louder this time.
“Dean,” Chuck turned him around forcefully, staring him straight in the eyes. “You have to leave, now.”
“No.” Cas stated again, louder.
Dean turned his head to see Cas, noticing the distress he was in, I just want to help. How can I help?
Chuck grabbed both of his shoulders blocking his view to Cas.
“Dean, you have to listen. Go back to the cabin okay? The one we were in before. I promise i'll explain everything when I get back.”
“No.” Cas was almost shouting now. His voice horse, his breathing calmed.
Dean couldnt contain his confusion and sadness any longer. “I don't unders-”
“Dean.” Chuck looked him in the eye, pleading. “Please.”
Dean nodded once, brushing past Chuck to get to the door. He glanced back, I'm sorry.
Then the screaming started.
It was the most awful thing Dean had ever heard in his entire life. Like a wounded animal that was in so much undeniable pain, it could do nothing but scream.
Dean clasped his hands over his ears, his eyes wide in fear and shock. Tears reaching his eyes and spilling onto his cheeks. He ran.
He ran out of the cabin that held those torturous screams only to find a crowd of people starting to gather outside.
“What the-” one of the men questioned.
Right. I'm supposed to be dead.
Another man approached him cautiously, dirt covered his dark face as if he had been hunting, his hair greasy and ruffled like it hadn’t been washed in months. Then, as if something hit a nerve the man punched Dean in the stomach. Dean doubled over, his knees hitting the ground.
“What did you do to him?!” the man boomed. “Someone check on Cas, Now!” he called behind him.
The man grabbed a tuft of hair from the back of Dean's neck, pulling to get Dean to look upward. He grabbed a familiar looking knife from behind his back, gliding the blade across Dean's cheek.
“Who sent you?” he asked raspingly.
Dean looked up into the mans eyes. He saw recognition there mixed with fear and pain. Dean tried to look at the handle on the knife, noticing the familiar markings. Ruby's knife.
“Where did you get that?” Dean questioned, focusing his stare on the knife.
The man pulled on Dean's hair harder, cutting lightly along his cheek. Dean hissed out in pain, he had no energy for snarky remarks let alone answering his dumb question. It had been a very long day. When the man saw that the knife had done nothing more than give Dean a mortal wound he loosened his grip.
“What the hell are you?” he mumbled in confusion.
“Jackson!” a woman belted.
Dean shifted his vision to where the voice was coming from, the woman from before, from the cabin.
“Release him.” she demanded as she strutted closer.
“He's a demon!” he hissed, dragging the knife over Dean's cheek once more. “I know he is!”
“He's not what you think.”
“Then, what, is he?!” he boomed.
The woman came to a halt in front of them both. “He's not from around here,” she answered calmly.
Jackson released him immediately. His hands shaking. The woman took his hands in hers, looking at him intently, trying to calm him down with touch.
“I know you were close,” she started, talking as calmly as she could, moving her hands over the handle of the knife.
“But this is far bigger than you understand.”
Jackson glanced at Dean, hurt clear in his expression. “He can't be here,” he whispered.
The woman took her finger, placed it under Jacksons chin, nudging his face to meet hers.
“Trust me,” she whispered.
Jackson let go of his grip on the knife, the woman took it, tucking behind her in her pants, then pulled Jackson into a hug.
Dean managed to pull himself away with the slightest amount of attention, taking shelter in the woods behind the cabins. He stumbled until he could walk no further, slumping against a trunk of a tree.He felt utterly hopeless, questioning why Zachariah sent him here in the first place. He drifted off to sleep with tears staining his cheeks.
A sudden movement startled Dean awake. Weight pressing against twigs on the ground, rustling of leaves. A figure was lurking behind some trees, watching him but not moving to come closer.
Dean stood up, his body tense, ready for some sort of attack.
“Who's there?” he asked the open air.
Silence.
“I know you're there! Show yourself!” he demanded, trying to keep his voice steady.
The last person Dean was expecting it to be showed himself. Cas.
Dean let his guard down, relief washing over him at the apparent false alarm of danger.
“Oh, it's just you.” Dean breathed quietly,
“Just me.” Cas answered, his voice quiet. “Is that a relief?” he asked.
Dean smiled, sitting himself back under the tree. “Sure, join me?”
Cas didn't move from where he stood. “I don't know if I can,” he whispered, not meeting Dean's eyes, not even looking in his direction.
“That's okay,” Dean muttered, leaning his head back against the tree, gazing at the stars above.
Dean drew his brows together I question. “Did you want something?” he asked, keeping his voice as calm as possible, human!Cas was very difficulty to read, Dean didn’t want to startle him.
“You've been out here for some time,” Cas started, gazing up at the stars just as Dean was, “Chuck explained some things to me.” Dean took this time to take in the version of Cas standing before him. He was different. Not wearing that awful trench coat for starters. His hair was longer, his eyes looked as if they had aged a considerable amount, his skin matching. His clothes worn, torn, old. Dean could swear the shirt was even his, boots too. Somehow, even his voice was different, not as tight or gruff as the Castiel he knew. It was like a completely different person was standing before him.
“I was worried you were a demon.”
“What?” Dean snapped out of his trance, “A demon? Why?”
Cas began picking at the lose bark of the tree he was leaning on. “Wouldn't be the first time.”
Dean jolted his gaze up to Cas' face. Cas met his stare, a sad smile on his face as he shrugged.
“I guess they thought it funny to torture me, you were the only way they knew how.” Cas moved cautiously, moving closer, just a little but closer never the less.
“Me?” Dean asked. Cas looked at him again but quickly looked away focusing his stare at the sky instead. Dusk was upon them, the stars shining brightly, soft animal calls filled the silence.
“Cas? How did I die?” Dean found himself asking.
Cas shifted on his feet, his eyes darting between Dean and the tree he was leaning on. He breathed.
“Why would you want to know that?” he asked, a sort of pleading in his eyes, trying to tell Dean he didn't want to talk about that if he didn't have to. It was a valid question of course. It wouldn't help at all, but Dean couldn't scratch the feeling that maybe it would help figure out why Zachariah had sent him here. So he repeated his thoughts aloud.
“It could help to find out why I was sent here.”
Cas' eyes widened slightly, a shimmer of fear creeping into the former angels frame.
“Zachariah?” Cas asked, fear mixed with hope, sounding like the Cas he knew. Dean smiled, his chest tightening at the familiarisation, an unfamiliar emotion creeping its way to the surface.
“The Angels?” Cas continued. “They're alive? They're here?” Hope over-clouding the fear, Cas took a small step forward.
“Wait,” Dean started, eyebrows drawing up on his face in confusion. “They're not here? You haven't spoken to them?”
Cas sighed, his body going limp, he began sliding down the trunk of the tree he was standing at, drawing his knees up to his chest once he hit the firm grass below.
“No,” he answered, “they're not here.” He buried his face into his knees.
Should I get up? Dean thought, I don't wanna hurt the poor guy if I get too close.
“Cas?” Dean asked, his voice quiet and quint.
Cas lifted his head, meeting Dean's eyes, his face began to screw up as if he were about to cry, his arms came round to wrap around his knees as if trying to pull them closer to himself, his eyes still holding Dean's stare. Dean felt as if Cas was staring into his soul. Cas smiled, his face still screwed up as if he were about to cry, but his face was taken over by a look of fondness.
“I've missed you saying my name like that.” he whispered, barely loud enough for Dean to hear.
Then, as if he caught what he just said he shook his head, breathing deeply.
“What year are you from?” Cas asked. His knees still drawn up to him but his arms loosening.
Dean breathed, shocked to find he had been holding his breath.
“Answer my question first.”
Cas shook his head, no. “I don't-” his face screwed up again, his brows tightening, his voice breaking. Dean stayed silent, waiting for Cas to collect himself. Calm himself down.
It took a few moments but Cas looked at him again, his face showing clear signs of heartbreak.
“I don't know-” he started, cutting himself again, taking a deep breath, looking away from Dean's face. “I don't know if I can talk about it.” He met Dean's gaze once more, “At least, not with you.”
Dean's stomach knotted. What the hell does that mean? Wait, that woman. What had she said about Cas and I about being practically married?
It clicked. Like a vase smashing on the ground. Shit.
“What year are you from, Dean?”, Cas' voice calm, as if he somehow knew the thoughts swimming around in Dean's head.
Dean couldn't breathe. In, out. In, out. Dean felt sick. He met Cas' eyes.
“2009,” he rasped out, barely. In, out.
Cas nodded, “I'm surprised it took you this long to figure out,” Cas said, smiling sadly, “It always did take you a while.”
In, out.
“I don't-”, he started
“I know. It's okay, you don't have to say anything.” In, out. “You told me, the other you, I know you know what i'm talking about. He said he wouldn't have admitted to it, but he knew it was there.” In, out. Cas smiled. “He told me he knew from the moment I stepped into that barn.”
“Stop.” Dean rasped, barely above a whisper. Cas didn't hear, too busy reliving the memory.
“He knew his life had changed forever.”
“Stop, please.” In, out. Dean was crying. Cas looked at him then, really looked. He moved his legs so he was sat on them instead of them being pressed against his front, Dean wiped the tears falling down his cheeks, Why is this happening? I'm supposed to be getting home, not having a chick-flick moment. Cas began moving slowly, inching toward Dean, as if he were some wounded animal that would skitter away. They kept their eyes locked to one another as Cas got closer. He didn't stop until his knees were touching Dean's, sitting in front of him. He gave Dean a sad but fond smile, reaching his hand up to Dean's face. Brushing the tears away. “Sorry,” Cas whispered, “I haven't spoken about you in a while, got a little carried away.”
“That's what that women meant wasn’t it? When she said we were married?”
Cas met his eyes, letting his hand fall to Deans knees. He smiled. “Something like that.”
Cas breathed deeply, gliding his other hand into his jacket, pulling out a prescription bottle. Unscrewing the lid he popped one into his mouth, like he'd done this a thousand times before.
“So you're on pills too?” Dean asked mockingly, a cocky smile reaching his lips.
Cas smiled again, “It helps,” he shrugged.
Dean pulled his knees closer to him, resting his face on his knees causing Cas to sit back a little, crossing his legs beneath him.
“You're different.” Dean stated.
Cas looked at him intently, “Good different, or bad?”
“Just,” Dean sighed, “I don't know. You smile as if you're happy but you still look sad.”
Cas shook his gaze, focusing on the grass next to him, picking at it then letting it fall through his fingers.
“I lost someone I care very much for, of course I'm sad.”
The funny feeling returned to Deans gut. “Me?” he asked, feeling bold.
“Who else?” Cas answered, as if it was the most simple thing in the world.
Dean brushed his hand over his face, breathing deep.
Why am I sat here with Cas? I need to figure out why I'm here. I should leave.
“Don't.” Cas murmured, “I know what you're thinking, please don't leave.” All traces of happiness vanished from Cas' expression, only sadness and sorrow remained.
“I only have a day left, I can't sit around doing nothing. I need to figure it out bef-”
“They want you to see what will happen.”
“What?”
Cas sighed. “At first I thought they wanted to stop us. But i'm not sure they really care about that. I mean, why would they?” Cas chuckled, but it did nothing to lighten the mood. “i think they want you to see what will happen if you continue to say 'No'.”
“To Michael?”
“And to Lucifer.”
“Why the hell would they want that?”
Cas smiled, pity covering the sadness. “Why wouldn't they?”
“So this?” Dean spoke, his mind racing, trying to make sense of what's just been said. He gestured to his surroundings. “This happened because I said no?”
“Yes.”
“Shit.”
“Yes.” Despite what he'd just realised, they smiled. Cas began staring again, he shuffled closer, resting his chin on his hands, his eyes skimming Dean's face.
Dean blushed, turning his had away. “What're you doing?”
“Memorising.” Cas stated, a small sad smile lifted his cheeks as his eyes continued scanning.
“Why?”
“Because you'll be leaving tomorrow.”
Dean glanced at Cas' lips, just for a brief second, as if he was trying to come to a decision in his head.
“We were together right?” Dean asked, a lump forming in the back of his throat, his stomach doing somersaults.
Cas' face relaxed. He stopped scanning Dean's face to look into his eyes.
“Yes.” he whispered.
“Married?”
“Practically.” Cas smiled, the memory filling his brain. “There was a ceremony.”
“A ceremony?”
“Well,” Cas chuckled, “There weren't exactly any priests around to do it properly.”
“Right.”
“You remind me of him.” Cas stated, his eyebrows drawing together, scanning Dean's face once again.
“Yeah?”
Cas nodded, his breath slowing, his pupils dilating, his eyes lingering at Dean's lips.
Dean gulped. “You know I'm not him though, don't you?” he whispered.
“I know you're from different time lines,” Cas stated “but it doesn’t mean I feel any differently.”
Dean tried to shuffle away slightly, his back hitting the trunk of the tree. This isn’t him. This isn't my Cas. He's high. He's lonely. He doesn’t want me, he wants his Dean.
Cas placed a single finger on Dean's lips, “You're over thinking,” he whispered. His face so close to Dean's the hunter could feel his warm breath on his face.
It took all of Dean's inner strength to put his hands on Cas' shoulders, nudging him away, giving them breathing room.
“You don't want me.” Dean spoke, “You don't want this, you're just high.”
Cas shook his head. “The pills, the drugs.” he gulped, “They help clear my head.”
Dean shook his head this time, using more force to push Cas away. “I don't believe you.”
Cas placed his hands on top of Dean's, using very little force to remove them, placing them on Cas' waist.
“I know you.” Cas stated, staring intently at him. “I know how you used to think, act.”
Dean could do nothing but stare, his inner strength dwindling, only he didn't want to use it to push Cas away. He wanted to bring him closer.
“I remember how scared you were when we first kissed.” Cas whispered, his face close to Dean's once more. “I remember you told me how much you wanted me but you were too scared to take it.”
Cas was now merely an inch away from Dean's lips, but he didn't move any closer, wanting Dean to make the last move.
“I remember you telling me you didn't deserve me.” Dean's eyes were now totally transfixed on Cas' lips, his breathing quickening, the feeling in his gut now becoming unbearable.
“You got it wrong, Dean.” Dean's eyes met blue. “It is I who doesn’t deserve you.”
Dean lurched forward.
Cas took a while to realise this was actually happening, he finally had Dean again. His strong hands held the hunters face, Dean's hand coming up to the back of Cas' neck to tug on the stray hairs. Cas let out a low growl, pushing Dean gently against the bark of the tree. Moving his mouth to the lobe of Dean's ear, biting it. Dean was done for. Pressing harder against the softness of Cas' lips.
Dean was expecting the kiss to stay rushed and hard, but after Cas took control he slowed it down. The pressure of his lips turning soft, yet continued to stay passionate. Dean tilted his head just slightly, opening his mouth, just a little. Moving his body closer, oping his legs to manoeuvre them either side of Cas' waist.
Cas slowed the kiss down, the sloppy make out now small soft pecks of lips. Opening his eyes, Dean had no idea why he hadn't done that with his Cas. They exchanged smiles, soft, heart-warming smiles, and just sat there in each others embrace. Their foreheads touching, their bodies entwined, sitting amongst the trees and under the stars.
Dean had never felt so relieved in his entire life.
Of course the moment couldn't last forever no matter how much either of them wanted it to.
Chuck came running through the trees a few hours before dawn, ranting on about some search party that had returned, Dean had no idea what the hell he was going on about but followed him anyways, Cas trailing behind, their hands entwined.
“So that's it it? That's the Colt.” the women from this morning asked one of the guys that had obviously been on the search party. Dean recognised them but couldn't place their names.
“Dean this is Risa,” he gestured to the women, now he could finally stop calling her that in his head.
“Benn, Stuart.” He gestured to the other two, Benn hovering over the Colt, his greasy brown hair tied up in a low pony tail. And Stuart sat on a chair opposite, his feet kicked up on the table. “You already know who this is.” Chuck said to the others.
Stuart gave a small hand gesture, probably supposed to resemble a friendly wave whilst Benn just nodded.
Risa huffed, “Yeah, we know who he is, we also know he's caused a lot of shit to happen today.”
“But he can help.” Cas piped up, still standing behind Dean, hands still enclosed together.
Dean piped up at this too, “If anything can kill Lucifer, that's it.”
“Great.” Risa replied snarly, “Have we got anything that can find Lucifer?”
“Wait? Kill? That's Sammy you're talkin' about,” Dean grunted.
“Dean,” Stuart sighed, “I'm sorry, but these orders come from you.”
“What?” Dean mumbled, eyebrows raised.
“Dean wanted Lucifer dead, no matter the cost.” Benn finished. “And it doesn’t matter anyway, “he turned his attention back to Risa. “We don't have to find Lucifer. We know where his is, or at least where he will be. The demon we caught last week he was on of the big guy;s entourage. He knew.”
“So a demon tells you were Lucifer is and you're just gonna believe it?” Dean asked.
“Oh trust me, he wasn't lyin'.” Benn answered smugly.
“And you know this how?” Dean inquired, if he only had a day left to see what the Angels wanted him to, seeing his brother dressed up as Luci would be a page turner.
“Our fearless co-leader, is all too well-schooled in the art of getting the truth.” Stuart stated, twiddling his thumbs in his lap as if the situation was boring him.
“Torture?”
Benn looked up as if he was surprised there was any other way of getting information from anyone.
“Great.” Dean sighed, Cas held his grip a little tighter in reassurance.
Benn shook his head, obviously not caring what Dean had to say or think about any of this. He pulled out a map from his back pocket, placing it on the table, unfolding it, then pointing at a red marking he'd made earlier.
“Lucifer is here, now” he reported. “I know the block and I know the building.”
“Oh good,” Risa remarked, “It's right in the middle of a hot zone.”
“Crawling with Crotes, yeah.” He looked at her and smirked. “You saying my plan is reckless?”
“Are you saying we walk in, past all the demons and the Crotes and then shoot the devil?”
“Yes.”
“Okay. If you don't like 'reckless' I could maybe use 'insouciant'', maybe.”
Stuart chuckled, “Already fighting like an old married couple and you've only been together a month. Well, the honey-moon stage didn’t last very long, now did it?”
“Are you coming?” he asked them both.
“Obviously.” they both chimed.
“We'll get the grunts moving.” Risa stated, trudging out the door.
“What about you two love-birds? Ya comin?” Benn asked them.
Dean and Cas exchanged looks, “You don't have to, but I'm doin' this.”
A look of sadness flashed over Cas' face before he composed himself. “I'm not going to see you again after this am I?” Cas asked, a sad smile present on his lonely lips. Dean kissed them without even thinking about it.
“I don't think so.” he replied, matching Cas' smile.
“Then I'm coming.”
Cas and Dean took a truck with Stuart, he seemed like the only one out of all the others that wasn't bothered by Dean so much. Maybe they weren't that close when he was alive. Maybe he just didn't care. It seemed like they were all going to their deaths anyway.
Dean and Cas sat in the back, just a few more hours of privacy before Dean saw his baby brother wearing Lucifer to the prom. Cas sensed Dean's distress and so, he held him. Dean's head resting in Cas' lap. He'd offered him some pills too but naturally, Dean declined. He didn't want any false emotions whilst he did this.
“What're you gonna do when you get back?” Cas asked, playing with strands of Deans hair, close to petting him.
Dean looked up, “You mean with the Angles? With Sam?” Dean gulped then took Cas' other hand in his. “With you?”
Cas smiled, “All of the above?”
Dean sighed, “Honestly? I have no friggen' clue.”
Cas continued to pet him. What the hell am I gonna do? I can't just go back and suddenly say yes? I can't just spring everything on Cas. He's different back then, he doesn't even understand human emotion.
“I do have some advice.” Cas said with that sad smile again. Dean raised his eyebrows, telling Cas to carry on. “Don't spring it on him too quickly.”
Dean sat up at that, but he kept close to Cas, their shoulders touching. “Who? Sam?”
“No,” Cas trembled. “Me.”
“What do you mean?”
“Dean,” Cas turned in his seat, no seatbelt on to stop him from doing so. He took Dean's hands in his and looked at him intently, his expression filled with all kinds of emotions. “I was different back then. Don't get me wrong, there is no doubt in my mind that I loved you back then. But I was an Angel. I had all those feelings and I just-”
“You didn't know what to do with them.”
Cas nodded, “I wasn't even entirely sure what they were, let alone what to do with them.”
“Are you saying I should back off? After all that happened today, after we kissed? You just want me to leave that all alone?” Dean stammered.
Cas clasped his hands tighter, shaking his head, “No, no of course not, not at all.” Dean breathed a sigh of relief. “Just, ease into it.” He smiled sadly, “No matter how much of a badass I used to be, understanding my own and others emotions was still confusing to me.”
“Did you love me? Back then I mean?” It was a question Dean had been meaning to ask since their moment in the woods earlier.
“Love is a strong word I have come to cherish and use carefully. Maybe not love, but I was certainly on my way to falling for you, in every way imaginable.”
“I don't know if I'm strong enough to teach you things, not when I don't even have a friggen' clue what I'm doing myself.”
“I know, but I believe in you. And so does he. You need each other. Even with losing you, as hard as that was, I'm glad we still had the moments we did.” Cas placed a gentle kiss on Dean's lips. “I'm going to miss you.” he whispered. Dean help his hand tightly. Me too, he thought.
The trucks were too big and too noisy to drive right into the hot zone so the few hunters they had left stopped just a few clicks out. Climbing out of the trucks, packing up ammo, they kept walking forward. Only there were no Crotes. In a hot zone, none in sight. But they kept walking. They had a mission to complete.
“That building there! Take cover behind those vehicles!” Benn ordered.
They all sat, reloading weapons, taking sips of water, eating Granola bars.
“We go in through those doors.” he pointed to the entrance, “We don't turn back. We kill anything that moves. Is that clear?” he boomed. All of them nodded.
“We leave in 3 minutes.”
Dean and Cas sat next to one another, sharing a bottle of rain water, neither of them saying anything. Neither of them knowing what to say. Cas was the one to break the silence. “Don't forget me.” he whispered. Dean stared at him, how could Cas even think such a thing? He lay his gun on the floor, brining Cas closer to him, holding him in his arms. This could be the last time he's get to hold him for a long time. Dean leaned his head back, bring his hand to Cas' face, lifting his chin up, kissing him on the lips. “How could I ever forget you?” he retorted. Cas smiled, taking in a deep breath, bringing their lips together once more. They leant their heads against each other, eyes closed, just savouring the few moments they had left.
He heard footsteps behind him, then everything went black.
Dean woke on the hard cold floor. Wiping the dirt from his eyes, looking around to see where the others were, gone. What the hell. Figuring the building was probably his best bet, he ran.
A single yelp of pain caught Dean's attention, making him turn a corner. That sounded like Cas.
Turning yet another corner, a loud crash of thunder boomed above him, causing Dean to jump. Coming to an open clearing he saw his worse nightmare in front of him.
Lucifer was standing over Cas' body, his right foot on Cas' neck. Cas was lifeless. Dead.
As if sensing his presence Lucifer turned revealing yet another nightmare, Sammy's face.
Dean frooze. Cas is dead. Cas is dead. Sammy and Lucifer. Sammy and Lucifer.
“Oh,” Lucifer remarked, not startled as such, just surprised to see him. “Hello, Dean.”
Cas is fine. He's back in '09. He's standing on that corner like an idiot, waiting for him to call. Cas is fine.
A sudden bolt of thunder and lightening shock Dean from his trance. Cas is fine. Sammy is fine.
“Well,” Lucifer spoke, interrupting Dean's thoughts. “Aren't you a surprise”
Another bolt of lighting. Dean squinted his eyes to protect them from the brightness.
“You've come a long way to see this, haven't you?” Dean was finding it hard to believe that he wasn't still asleep on that dingy floor. Lucifer has Sam dressed in a white suit, his frame strong and tough. In a strange way, he looked nothing like Sammy at all. Everything about his appearance screamed 'Lucifer'.
“I'm sorry, it must be painful, speaking to me in this form.” He walked closer to Dean. “But it had to be your brother, it had to be.” he leaned forward to put a hand on Dean's shoulder, but Dean moved away. An angry scowl on his face. Lucifer sighed, tilting his head, in a way it made him look a little innocent. “You don't have to be afraid of my, Dean. What do you think I'm going to do?”
He walked over to Cas' limp body, sighing at his fallen brother. “Such a shame.” he mumbled, “But then that was my brother, always choosing his heart,” he stared at Dean at that word, “Instead of his brain.”
Lucifer shifted his stance, holding sammy's body upright. “Ever hear the story about how I fell from grace?” he asked. Cas is fine. Sammy is fine. Dean groaned.
“Good god, you're not gonna' tell me a bedtime story are ya'?” Dean straightened himself out. They're fine. This is just an alternative universe. “My stomach’s almost out of bile.”
Lucifer smirked, “Do you know, why God cast me down?”
Dean didn’t answer, he didn’t need to. This dickbag was going to continue his story anyways.
“Because I loved him.” he confessed, “More than anything.” More flashes and rumbled from the storm over head. “And then, God created you. The little,” he paused, “hairless apes.”
“And then he asked all of us to bow down before you, to love you more than him.” A questioning look went across his face. “And I said, 'Father, I can't' I said, 'These human beings, are flawed, murderous. And for that, God had Michael cast me into hell. Now tell me, does the punishment fit the crime?”
Dean's body began to tremble. The sorrow he felt, the guilt, the anger, all filling up inside him, giving him the courage to speak his thoughts aloud.
“You're not foolin' me, you know that?” Dean spoke aloud. His eyes glossing over at the sight of his brother being used in this way. “With this sympathy-for-the devil crap. I know what you are.”
Lucifer was taken back. Surprisement in the words Dean just spoke. “What am I?”
“You're the same thing, only bigger. The same brand of cockroach I've been squashin' my whole life.” he spat, anger filling within him. “An ugly, evil, belly-to-the-ground, supernatural piece of crap. The only difference between them, and you? Is the size of your ego.”
Dean trembled, How did I let this happen?How did we let it get this far?
“I like you, Dean” he stated. “I get what the other angels see in you. Especially my little brother. Goodbye. We'll meet again soon.”
Lucifer turned, his back facing Dean , walking away.
'You better kill me now!” Dean yelled after him.
Lucifer looked amused by this outburst. “Pardon?”
“You better kill me now. Or I swear, I will find a way to kill you. And I won't stop.”
Lucifer stepped forward, a smile playing on Sam's lips. “I know you won't.” His smile grew wider. “I know you won't say yes to Michael either,” he smirked “and I know, you won't kill Sam. Whatever you do, you will always end up,” he glanced around his surroundings, gesturing toward them, “here. Whatever choices you make, whatever details you alter, we will always end up, here.”
Dean felt too much sorrow within him, he couldn’t help himself, he let a tear fall down his cheek.
Lucifer continued. “I win. So I win.”
Dean shook his head, gritting his teeth, holding his head high. “You're wrong.”
“See you in five years, Dean.” A bolt of lightening and he was gone.
Dean rushed over to Cas' body. Kneeling beside him, his hands shaking, his fingers trembling as he reached out to hold him. Another bolt of lightening had Dean turn around, Zachariah. He touched Dean's forehead then... nothing. Just white.
They were back in that stingy hotel room, three days had felt like a month. Dean was now standing, leaning his body back against the cabinets. Dean still had stale tears staining his cheeks, the image of Cas dead on the floor still dead in his mind. But he was back, Cas was safe, Sammy was sfae. As safe as they could be anyways.
“You saw it right?” Zachariah asked, “You saw what happens?” Dean wiped his face with hands. “You're the only one who can prove Lucifer wrong.” he added. “Just say yes.'
“How do I know this isn’t one of your tricks, huh?” Dean asked, anger still fresh. “Some sort of angel- hocus-pocus?”
“The time for tricks is over, Dean.” Zachariah stated. “Give yourself to Michael. Say yes and we can strike,” he started to walk closer, “before Lucifer gets to Sam. Before Lucifer gets to Castiel. That I have to say.” Zachariah chucked, “was quite a surprise.”
“Don't” Dean warned, walking slowly over to the opposite side of the room. He stayed silent for a few moments, before smirking. “Nah.” he simply stated, turning to face Zachariah.
“'Nah'?” he repeated, taken back at this response. “Haven't you learnt your lesson?”
“Oh,” Dean chuckled, “I've learnt my lesson alright. Just not the one you wanted to teach.”
Zachariah's anger rose, his voice now a bellow, “Well I guess i'll have to teach it again, Ive got you now bo-”
A flash of white and Dean was suddenly at a roadside. He turned. Castiel. All the feeling sand emotions returned to Dean at once. He moved closer, only to stop himself. This Cas didn’t know. But they way Castiel was looking at him, like he had all the faith in the world in this one Man. Dean stepped forward, embracing the Angel in a 'bro-hug'. Patting his back, Castiel stood stiff.
“Hug me back you moron,” Dean huffed. “It's been a long day.”